bruce wayne

My ideal beginning to a Batman movie:

We start with a slow pan down to Gotham as Oracle narrates

“Ask your average person who Gotham’s most famous citizen is, and you’ll get the same response every time: Bruce Wayne. Everybody’s heard of Bruce Wayne. You’ve probably heard his name a million times before. But there are some things that the average citizen doesn’t know about him. See, to the people of Gotham, Bruce Wayne is a rich kid who never grew up. They think he’s a buffoon, an airhead, a moron. But the truth is…”

*Batman bursts out of a window, screaming, on fire*

*record scratch, freeze frame*

“…they aren’t entirely wrong about that.”

Dear mansplaining morons who think "Batman could totally win a fight with Wonder Woman"

Are y'all high?

Bruce 

- an average human dude
- has no superpowers to speak of
- trained fighting for like, 10, 20 years tops
- uses fancy but breakable human-made gadgets

Diana

- literally a deity
- “only a god can kill another god”
- trained fighting for 500 to 2,000 years (depending on who you ask) under Antiope, the greatest general in the history of a legendary warrior race
- can fly
- can literally level a building with a single punch
- can control lightning
- able to take punches by someone capable of crumbling a gun with their bare hands
- can toss a tank with her bare hands like it’s nbd
- has magical weapons originally made for & owned by gods

Being a man doesn’t give you the ability to defeat a deity who’s trained for centuries under the best of the best, has magic powers, and magic weapons, you twats.

Being a man doesn’t make you better than a deity.

You know what I want?
I want in the Justice League movie for Diana to see the Robin suit in the Batcave, ask about it and have Bruce walk away silently.
I want later in the movie for her to say, “I’ve lost friends in wars before.” And I want Bruce to respond, in the most pained voice, “but have you ever lost a son?”
I want Alfred talking about it with her, telling her what happened.
I want acknowledgement of Jason Todd’s death as Robin in the Justice League movie.

Jason: We are gathered here today-

Dick: [sobs]

Jason: To honor the life-

Damian: And death

Dick: [sobs harder]

Jason: Of Blue, someone who meant much to us all. He was family. A victim of- uhh…

Dick: [sobs some more]

Damian: This is pathetic. I’m going to my room.

Tim: Don’t be so rude! This is a funeral!

Damian: For a fish

Jason: Shut up. Both of you. Steph, start the music again.

Steph: Sure thing, lover boy.

Jason: Blue was only 3 weeks old when he was tragically taken from us

Dick: [wails]