broadway: heathers

List Of Bootlegs:

Here are some of the bootlegs I currently have, pm me if you’d like any of them.

• 25th Annual Putnam County Spelling Bee

• Beauty and the Beast

• Bonnie and Clyde

• Charlie and The Chocolate Factory (London)

• Cinderella (OBC)

• Dear Evan Hansen

• Finding Neverland

• Grease

• Hamilton (OBC i believe)

• Heathers (OC, except Charissa’s Chandler and Dan is JD)

• Heathers (Full OC, act 1 only)

• Newsies (OBC)

• Newsies (OBC // i have two)

• Waitress

• Wicked (OBC)

• Wicked (OBC // i have two)

• Wicked (Kara Lindsay)

Some of these may be OBC, I’m not 100% sure, but the ones I know for sure are marked.

Heathers the Musical: A Summary
  • Beautiful: i fuckin hate this place jk now I’m hot and popular
  • Candy Store: the Schuyler Sisters + evil
  • Fight For Me: dAAAAAAaaaaamn
  • Freeze Your Brain: tragic backstory™
  • Big Fun: my first week of college in a nutshell
  • Dead Girl Walking: sexytimes
  • The Me Inside of Me: wait now she’s somehow MORE popular
  • Blue: fuckboys perpetrate rape culture
  • Our Love is God: “i worship you” awwww “i worship you” cool bUT IT’S STILL MURDER J.D.
  • Prom or Hell: my bf is a triple murderer but he’s hot as fuck soooo
  • My Dead, Gay Son: our sons were gay and whoops so are we
  • Seventeen: murder is probably a no no
  • Shine a Light: oversharing teacher + snappy choreo = still uncomfortable
  • Lifeboat: bitchy cheerleader revealed to be cinnamon roll
  • Shine a Light Reprise: “what the fuck heather” -Heather D. “what the FUCK heather?!!?!” -audience
  • Kindergarten Boyfriend: we’re supposed to feel bad for her but also she kept a scab in a locket?? + more suicide
  • Yo Girl: scariest song in the show tbh
  • Meant to be Yours: VERONICA openthe opentheDOOR plEAse
  • Dead Girl Walking Reprise: surprise bitch, bet you thought you’d seen the last of me
  • I Am Damaged: i would die for you and now im gonna*BOOm*
  • Seventeen Reprise: fuck you all and lets go watch The Princess Bride
Quick Descriptions of Some Musicals

Hamilton: The Founding fuckboys Fathers in the form of highschool drama

Falsettos: Lots of Jews, lots of gay, lots of intense crying

Book of Mormon: Everyone is made fun of in this musical. Everyone.

Rent: Money is difficult, but so is AIDS and being gay

Phantom of the Opera: Mysterious man in a mask swoons you faster than you can say “Christine” no matter what your sexuality is

Newsies: Group of guys (that aren’t mormons) aren’t taking shit from no one (also the New York accent will stick with you, believe it or not)

Dear Evan Hansen: Sad musical about teen angst could never be so relatable

Wicked: Hey remember that one movie that comes on tv every now and then during the holidays that your parents reflect on? Yeah this is before that

School of Rock: Fake teachers and rebellious children who are all surprisingly talented

Some Musicals as Clickbait Titles
  • Hamilton: He didn't throw away his shot- until he did!
  • Phantom: "The strange affair of the Phantom of the Opera, a mystery never fully explained."
  • Assassins: The strangest JFK assassination conspiracy yet!
  • The Drowsy Chaperone: This man listened to musicals so much that he hallucinated he was in one!
  • Heathers: This Teen Murdered Three of Her Classmates- Find Out What Went Wrong!
  • Les Mis: We heard this story about an obscure French rebellion- and we are LITERALLY SOBBING :'(
  • Into the Woods: You'll never look at fairy-tales the same way again!
  • The Sound of Music: New evidence has uncovered what upper-class Austrians did in light of Anschluss, and you'll never guess what it was!
  • Sweeney Todd: "Demon Barber": One Man's Journey of Revenge, Murder, and a Meat Grinder.
  • Waitress: You go, girl! This woman's journey is the most inspirational thing you'll see all year.
Renamed Musicals
  • The Last Five Years: We were happy for ten minutes
  • Bring It On: just like the movies but better because Lin-Manuel Miranda
  • Dogfight: All My Friends Are Dead by: Eddie Birdlace
  • American Psycho: Benjamin Walker's abs ft. Jennifer Damiano
  • Spring Awakening: horny German teenagers make me cry thirty times
  • Gypsy: Broadway dance moms
  • In the Heights: remember Lin Manuel Miranda before Hamilton?
  • Jersey Boys: we're all shitty people but at least we're shitty people who can sing
  • How to Succeed in Business: life is good if you can lie
  • Matilda: Carrie Jr.
  • Daddy Long Legs: haha she said "daddy"
  • Children of Eden: the bible ft. belting
  • Tick, Tick...Boom: Remember Jonathan Larson before Rent?
  • Urinetown: urine jokes and Hunter Foster
  • A Chorus Line: we're all suffering so we cover up our emotions with dancing
  • Newsies: hot gay teenage boys stomp a lot
  • The Book of Mormon: we're all suffering so we cover up our emotions with religion
  • Footloose: let hiM BE A DANCER!!!1!!
  • Women on the Verge of a Nervous Breakdown: crazy women take lots of Valium
  • Next to Normal: crazy woman takes a lots of Valium
  • Avenue Q: ruining your childhood one song at a time
  • Bullets Over Broadway: Zach Braff can sing?
  • If/Then: Elphaba marries Roger
  • Parade: JRB can't write anything happy
  • Honeymoon in Vegas: JRB finally writes something happy
  • Ragtime: everyone's a little bit racist but it's okay because it's 1910
  • The Full Monty: suicide and strippers
  • Jekyll and Hyde: Frank Wildhorn needs to chill
  • Wonderland: Frank Wildhorn really needs to chill
  • Bonnie and Clyde: Frank Wildhorn finally finds his chill
  • Catch Me if You Can: Aaron Tveit ignores his feelings with jazz numbers
  • Merrily We Roll Along: we were all happy for like ten minutes
  • Cats: what?
  • Spelling Bee: guy from Modern Family ft. erection song
  • [title of show]: what musical theatre majors go through after college
  • Calvin Berger: Cyrano with horny teenagers
  • Legally Blonde: Laura Bell Bundy can belt my face off
  • Little Women: Jo isn't straight but alright whatever
  • Assassins: kill a president and all your problems will be solved
  • Clinton the Musical: the best thing to come out of Broadway in 50 years
  • Carrie: Matilda with murder
  • Rent: we're all dead inside but it's alright
  • Jasper in Deadland: we're all dead inside but it's not alright
  • Falsettos: family is important ft. the guy from into the woods
  • Company: love is stupid and so are all of you
  • Evening Primrose: literally wh a t the fuck
  • The Frogs: literALLY WH A T THE FUCK
  • School of Rock: these kids have more talent in their left pinkies than you ever will
  • The Addams Family: she's being pulled in a new direction
  • Aladdin: seriously SO much better than the movie
  • Bare: horny American teenagers make me cry thirty times
  • Bloody Bloody Andrew Jackson: everyone hates Andrew Jackson boo hoo
  • The Bridges of Madison County: Kelli O'Hara needs to stop being perfect immediately
  • Finding Neverland: somebody wrote fanfiction about J.M. Barrie
  • Fun Home: you're gonna cry a lot
  • Heathers: literally fuckin chill
  • Hamilton: literally fuckin chill (reprise)
  • Love's Labour's Lost: horny college students are horny college students
  • Meet John Doe: Heidi Blickenstaff can belt my face off
  • Pippin: sad gay circus boy
  • Shrek: everyone makes fun of this musical but it's seriously amazing????
  • Something Rotten: 16th century fanfiction
  • Tuck Everlasting: become best friends with your kidnappers
  • Waitress: Deep Dish Blueberry Pie
  • Sweeney Todd: Deep Shit Blueberry Pie
  • West Side Story: MARIA!
  • Zombie Prom: lol why
A (brief) masterpost of musicals!

(I don’t own/ didn’t record these!) Also, they’re all on YouTube!(it’s unfinished so far!) (I really love brackets, but if any don’t work, I can probably get a different video for you from somewhere else, just send a message. I have a heck of a lot of links)

Tony Awards (full show)

HEATHERS VIDEOS YOU SHOULD ALL WATCH

I myself have fallen down the “heathers videos on YouTube” rabbit hole sooo many times. But if for some reason you haven’t (or you’re new to the musical) these are my top 13 favorite videos on the tube that feature heathers. Some of these are OBC and some are other productions. I’ve literally probably watched all these videos like 5 times in their entirety. Enjoy.

1. OBC previewing the show: https://youtu.be/fjxacuu6b1Q

2. Original Heather Duke (Queen Alice Lee) covers Candy store: https://youtu.be/mG5Na03CINI

3. “JD Never saw that point shoe coming”: https://youtu.be/XOfrs_tck-Y

4. Live footage (not illegal!!) of OBC!: https://youtu.be/Gpad8LUEwsg

5. More non-illegal live footage of OBC!: https://youtu.be/ZxE05TP_hL8

6. Dead girl walking in the recording studio: https://youtu.be/1oyrGBahq50

7. This performance of candy store: https://youtu.be/sKSKK2KgPYQ (features OBC minus Alice Lee..Kristolyn played Duke in the original LA production tho!!)

8. Aaaand this performance of candy store: https://youtu.be/bFpYeFLqkXY

9. This cover of seventeen: https://youtu.be/4h49RTARPDs

10. This medley: https://youtu.be/gJRA_GMuE3E

11. This performance of dead girl walking: https://youtu.be/P4VEs2rDVEo

12. Jessica’s mashup of Beautiful (Carol King) and Beautiful (Heathers): https://youtu.be/jF9kl25udDs

And finally

13. Blue: https://youtu.be/fBcD9Z91R7E

Congrats! You have been heathers educated. But for real, just listen to the cast album and you’re good to go. This is useful for late night video binging, though.