britney & kevin chaotic

Maybe, after 10 long years, she’s finally re-filming the music video for Outrageous. You know, the cancelled single from In The Zone? The same music video that took out her knee and effectively killed her ability to dance like a superstar. the knee injury that pushed her closer to K-Fed. and their wedding. and UPN’s critically acclaimed Britney & Kevin: Chaotic. and tater-tot & french fry. and her breakdown. I’ve written a thesis on this.

26 Signs You’re a Britney Spears Superfan according to e!online

If you’re a Britney Spears superfan, we don’t even need to tell you that E! is premiering I Am Britney Jean, Britney’s newest documentary, this Sunday at 9 p.m. You already know. But here are a few more signs that you might be a Britney superfan:

1. You can name all eight of her albums in chronological order.

Easy: …Baby One More TimeOops!…I Did It AgainBritneyIn the ZoneBlackout,CircusFemme Fatale and Britney Jean.

2. You know all of the choreography for the “I’m a Slave 4 U” breakdown.

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3. You can recite the spoken section of “Lucky.”

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“Best Actress. And the winner is…Lucky! (music break: ah, ah whah-ah-ah) I’m Roger Johnson from Pop News, standing outside the arena waiting for Lucky. Oh my god, here she comes!”

4. And “Oops!…I Did It Again.”

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“All aboard! Britney, before you go, there’s something I want you to have. Oh, it’s beautiful, but wait a minute, isn’t this…? Yeah, yes it is. But I thought the old lady dropped it into the ocean in the end. Well baby, I went down and got it for you. Aw, you shouldn’t have.”

5. You’re still jealous of anyone who got to wear school uniforms.

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6. And, at least once in your life, you’ve tied your shirt off to look like Britney’s in “BOMT.”

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7. You only watch the VMAs when Britney is appearing/performing.

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Otherwise, what’s the point?

8. And you (briefly) wanted a pet snake after seeing her “I’m a Slave 4 U” performance.

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9. You watched the entirety of Britney and Kevin: Chaotic. Every. Single. Episode.

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10. You only watched the season of The X Factor with Britney.

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11. You saw Crossroads in theaters opening night.

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And own a copy on VHS/DVD/Beta Disc/whatever.

12. You know who Felicia is.

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And think she deserves all of the respect. All of it.

13. You tried (and failed) to find Maull It barbecue sauce at your grocery store.

13. You tried (and failed) to find Maull It barbecue sauce at your grocery store.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4dh0PPlMWBg

14. You still think denim on denim is a good look

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5. You know the different between “Cold as Fire” and “Hot as Ice.”

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Look it up.

16. You still think “State of Grace” should have made the album.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Tm4VYgbRDl8

17. But know Blackout was and always will be one of the most perfect pop albums ever.

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18. You freaked out when Britney added “Mannequin” to her Circus tour setlist.

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Meanwhile, non-superfans were like, “This isn’t ‘Toxic.’”

19. Onyx is your favorite mineral. Because Britney named a tour after it.

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20. You skipped school/ditched work/canceled on your friends to watch Making the Video.

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(RIP, Making the Video.)

21. You listened to other Sabi music, just because she featured on “(Drop Dead) Beautiful.”

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r9okmtoo8TA

22. You still wonder what could have been if Britney had finished her “Outrageous” video.

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If you even know Britney made a video with Snoop Dogg you’re in superfan territory.

23. You remember where you were when 2007 happened.

(No need to drudge that up. We’re past it.)

24. You own every compilation album, greatest hits, remixes, etc.

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Even though you already have all those songs on the regular CDs.

25. You know all the words to all of her songs, no matter how obscure.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3SLINoB4qVo

“Rebellion,” anyone?

26. You’re traveling to Vegas to see her Piece of Me concert.

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