This is probably the best description of my individual experience of psychosis.
I have BPD, one of my most prominent symptoms is anxiety. I have various ways in which I keep my anxiety down as much as possible, just ensuring that this is possible, whilst trying to be a good friend , colleague , etc. At times, my anxiety spirals out of control, and when this happens, I become psychotic.
It’s very , very tiring and I have come across many people over the years that have mimicked my symptoms for attention, sympathy and even to add ‘quirks’ to their personality to pull! I’ve come across websites where mental illness is glamourised, by (usually) young girls playing the damsels in distress.
BPD is a complex , severe , mental illness, and there is NOTHING glamorous or sexy about it !
I have a psychotic break around once every 3 months. It’s exhausting, scary and far from pretty! I usually come out of it after a couple of weeks or so, then have to gather myself and replenish my energy which takes a further few weeks. And before I know it, I am back, struggling with another psychotic break.
So trust me when i say , you NEVER wanna feel the way I do.
I wouldn’t wish this on my worst enemy.
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