breaking paradigms

En unas pocas centurias, the future will belong to the mestiza. Because the future depends on the breaking down of paradigms, it depends on the straddling of two or more cultures. By creating a new mythos—that is, a change in the way we perceive reality, the way we see ourselves, and the ways we behave—la mestiza creates a new consciousness.

- Gloria Anzaldúa, from ‘Borderlands/La Frontera: The New Mestiza’

anonymous asked:

transfemme dysphoria is wishing with all your heart to be a real girl

TFDF 00029

Normally, I don’t say anything on these, at least not as a proper message, but this is pretty important for me to address. I dealt with this a lot when I was starting transition, desperately wishing and practically bargaining with anything I could try to call up, that I could just be transformed and become a real girl.

It’s taken a lot of time to break that paradigm, and somedays the dysphoria still hits hard enough to make me feel like this, typically leading to curling up in bed and sobbing.

What it’s taken me this long to learn though, is that trans women are real women, there are no questions about it. We are just as much women as any cis woman out there, we are just as important and just as worthy of love, respect, and (proper, decent) attention. It’s hard as hell to remember that some days, but it’s true and it’s necessary to know.

So, anon, and anybody else out there who feels this way: You ARE a real woman if you consider yourself to be a transwoman. It’s not a question.

Women who are called into divine feminine service – that of raising the collective feminine spiritual vibration quotient on this planet – are not shrinking violets.

These women – who no doubt possess an ocean of the purest unconditional love and compassion at their conjoined Hearts – must be strong, bold and wise enough to make waves wherever they are sent.

These women are the Ones who walk into old paradigms and shake them up at their core.

These women are the Ones who have heard the Call of the Mountains, of the Sea, and of the Stars and Wind, and are doing something about it.

They are compassionate enough to have heard the desperate cries of those who need their Light. They are brave enough to move out of their own self-deprecation and self-doubt, and move into communities that require a sensitive, wise, age-old and intuitive voice to lead them back to sanity.

These women are not ‘nice’. They are not compliant. They are not people-pleasers. They do not seek approval from every ego that crosses their path. They do not adhere to the embedded morality and restrictions related to ‘what good girls do’.

They are not ‘good girls’. They are not ‘bad girls’ either. They refuse to be put into boxes because they have chosen to release and liberate their Spirits.

If they only lived to seek approval from others then they would be agreeing to the status quo as it is right now in this world.

These courageous, pioneering females have appetites for life, for love, for sex, for food, for men, for women, for the earth, for the Light.

They have appetites for power, and they are greedy for personal and spiritual expansion.

When you control a woman’s appetite for anything, you make it easier to control her.

These women were never, ever destined to be controlled. They have been given very specific roles by the Goddess to go into achingly-old and crumbling patriarchal paradigms, and break them up.

They have been selected to charge into places that are stuck, dead, overgrown with weeds, blocked and numb. They bring with them their overarching Higher Wisdom and carefully-honed skills of healing.

They know, deep inside, that the people and places that they are sent to are designed to be broken open, broken down, broken through.

This is not an easy task because it demands total courage and conviction of the Self.

It demands total Wholeness, Self-Realisation, Commitment to Truth, Unwavering Faith and Devotion to the Greater Good.
It demands Vision and Foresight.
It demands staying centred in the eye of the storm.
It demands all their inner resources to create frequency changes, stir up the emotional and spiritual waters, expose secrets and lies, confront denials and plant the seeds of extreme and radical transformation.

When these Women are called in, changes start.
All that has been repressed and denied begins to surface. The healing starts, but first comes the chaos.

Women of Spirit are not afraid of chaos, because they know that all New Light is born from it.

They are not afraid of intense emotions. They are not afraid of the ego’s reactions to being threatened by Divine Love.

Women who are in their Wholeness are a threat to the Old Order.

Women who love themselves, their bodies, their hearts, their intuitive senses, their psychic gifts, their ability to love without manipulation or fear – these women are dangerous to the status quo.

These women have energy to change the earth, bring Her back to balance, bring Her back to Love.

Because they are not wasting time or energy hating themselves. They are not wasting time worrying about what others think of their brazen confidence, their unapologetic, raw creative and sexual power, their mesmerising intelligence, and ability to rule the world.

These women do not have to apologise for existing.
They do not have to make themselves quieter, smaller, more ‘appropriate’, less visible or diminished.
They are sent to Earth to love with a fierce quality of compassion and wild, sacred intensity that has no roots in the ego.

This kind of Healing Love can only ever emanate from the Spirit.
These are brave, wise, visionary, patient, persevering, devoted and relentless females.
They will keep going until their last human breath on the earth plane.
They will not stop.

These are Women who Live to carry out tasks of great global and universal importance. Don’t underestimate the nature of these Holy Tasks. There are many who live here who want to bring them down; who can’t handle their ability to reveal Truth; who wither in the face of such unbridled self-love.
Who the hell do these women think they are?

Who do they think they are, to go around believing in themselves, loving themselves, admiring themselves, using their talents, expounding their ideas, opinions and wisdom, spreading their goddamn-blinding-Light?

Women who don’t need approval from men to feel they are valid. Women who don’t need to be kept by a man to feel they are safe. Women who don’t need to be in a relationship just to feel worthy.

These are women who really, truly love men.

These are the women that hold the Real Keys to the spiritual progression of the Masculine.

They are the Ones who will love men from a place of re-discovered Wholeness and Empowered Essence.

This is what Men really want, and need, in order to be free, divinely-motivated, built-up, charged and ready for the New Era.

These Women of Spirit NEED men, and adore men. But they are programmed to CHALLENGE men at their very existential core.

In order for these Women to be ravished, taken, blown-open to God and taken into worshipful ecstasy by Men, they need first to have challenged them, pushed them, confronted them and ignited their Spirits.

These Women have a Contract to show the men who are ready for them Who They Really Are.

And this only happens if women make waves, make noise, challenge untruth, unashamedly reveal and display their power, and look unwaveringly into the eyes of any who would seek to diminish them.

If you know a woman like this, you will already have felt the vibrations of her.
If you are this woman, don’t give up.
If you want to be this woman, you have full Divine permission.
Go, and rock the world on it’s axis.

You were never, ever born to be forgotten. You will always, eternally, be remembered.

~Sophie Bashford

Unworshipped Gods & You

Hello I am here to spread the good word with this prelim primer on Unworshipped Gods. Enjoy.

*this is all from astral direction experience so expect some measure of disagreement with me; I am not the authority to end all on the topic or the astral in general, and I should not be seen as such. Anyways!

What are Unworshipped/Unrecorded Gods?

I use many names. Unworshipped Gods, Unknown Gods, Lost Gods, Unrecorded Gods for those who want a different name! But they all mean relatively the same thing.

These are the Gods that never had human names, or maybe they did once, and then they were lost to the annals of history–likely by their OWN hand. Perhaps they have never been here at all, or been known here. They are not always Gods for humans, they are often wild, natural forces, something beyond-us. They are far older than we are.

They are the Gods you don’t see mentioned.

Why the word Unworshipped? If I find one isn’t it Worshipped?

Because astral, that’s why. No but really. I chose this name to describe an astral concept because a lot of deities “die” from this world on purpose, removing all trace of themselves, in order to go into seclusion for a time, or a period of rest, on another plane. Many entities you may talk to don’t actually want any attention anymore, but they still may pick you to receive a lesson or two, or set up some kind of reciprocity. But generally these entities operate differently.

But what if an Unworshipped God wants me to spread their name?

This is a possible thing, an Unknown God could very well want to enter the public sphere. But many do not.

There are quite a few people on tumblr that come to mind at the moment that are in fact building personal traditions around THEIR Unknown Gods–and sometimes that’s really the path that is calling you, and you just don’t have the tools yet to explain it. That’s okay.

Why are Unknown Gods important?

Mostly because of the fact that they fall through our collective Spiritworker/Witch/Pagan cracks, precisely for being Unknown.

In the Spiritwork/Pagan/Witchcraft communites, many of us are guilty of wanting to know a God/Spirit’s identity that is seeking us out YESTERDAY. We pass around association checklists and are satisfied that SOME deity we know of has to be what it is, and then it’s fine.

But…what if it’s not?

There aren’t checklists for Unknown Gods. Not really. That’s usually because of the name, and some other factors. Unknown Gods are not always Everyone’s Gods. They may come to you, privately, quietly, under guise of night, and ask you not to reveal their name to others. They may not want to be for public consumption. They may be in retirement, but something about you and what you can bring intrigues them, they take an interest, they begin trying to get in contact.

But picture, for a moment, that someone is sending you letters. You understand someone is trying to contact you, but the letters are in a foreign language you don’t understand. This language doesn’t exist on earth. It may be CLOSE to a language you’ve seen before, but not…totally right.

But this language must exist here, you think. It’s logically impossible otherwise.

You post the letter online, show it to friends that work with known deities, they (being very helpful) give you some pointers, possibilities on who it might be. None of them feel exactly right, but…I mean, it must be ONE, right? Eventually you settle on one that seems “close enough”, and set up everything from there, even if it’s not them.

But…this is missing the point. If you lack the context to recognize when something is NOT adding up, you will tend to identification errors when you try to make it make sense. Sometimes the simplest answer–That this DOES NOT make sense inside your existing paradigm–is the right one.

The problem with Unknown Gods is the fact they’re Unknown.

Many people don’t even realize this can be A Thing. That you can have a deity with no name or station approach you and godbother the hell out of you until you get frustrated enough to sit down and admit something isn’t making sense here. Often this needs to break your existing paradigm of Gods. 

What do they do?

Everything. God is not really a title reserved for a select few on the astral. Everything has some kind of overseer–a God for pebbles, a God for entire planes, a God for the orbits of planets. So many, and so many thousands more.

Not every Unknown God is a Big one. Maybe you made a deal with a God that raises giraffes on some remote peninsula 700 years ago. I dunno your life. Stranger shit has happened, I assure you.

What does that have to do with me?

It should expand your horizons.

For every man, a God, as my astral family says. I’ve talked to many deities/gods of many different planes, and they are all a fascinating source of information–provided they will receive you, or have perhaps found you out personally.

You aren’t limited by what humans know, and now perhaps you realize you didn’t realize you were being limited. Oooh, paradox.

What’s the difference between God, Spirit, Guide?

Semantics, mostly, and development. You can have an unworshipped god actually seek you out to become a kind of mentor or guide, you can have a god actually sign up to be a guide, you can have a regular spirit that essentially BECOMES an unknown god over time, with age and energy. Potato, potah-to. We could sit here all day discussing the minute differences, but it may be faster to just, you know, try asking the God themselves.

What do I do the next time I’m being Godbothered, now that I know about this new class of deity?

Really, REALLY take time to sit down and slowly dissect what you are being sent. Be cognizant the checklist for your deity/spirit/guide may not exist yet, and that is okay. When Kratos (white wolf, unworshipped god, british asshole, also my guide) showed up, my checklist was like this:

  • Asshole
  • British as hell
  • White arctic Wolf
  • Wears nothing but suits
  • Information broker
  • Black hair with a white stripe

So you can imagine my utter confusion and 6 months of research before I finally admitted I had no idea what on god’s green earth I had got myself into with this dude

Your checklist doesn’t have to neatly match an existing deity’s list. It is completely fine if you are, in fact, being bothered by a VERY known deity! But, to me, I find it better to approach the identification process with a very WIDE net, then pare down from there–so as not to miss anything if the God of Shitake Mushrooms is really trying to talk to you personally about the benefits of fungus.

Dusken told me I could go to the astral and bother ever God I see and demand names and spread them all over the internet!

No. Return to step 1. Then maybe have a glass of water or five, damn kid

So what’s my takeaway point?

Take time to really get to know the next entity that wants to talk to you.

REALLY allow the space for them to characterize themselves in their own terms, which may not be human ones. That’s honestly all I’m advocating for.

Allow the possibility your new guide/god may not have terms yet to describe them, and that this is okay, the get-to-know-you-process can be a Process.

I wish you the best of luck with your journey w/ unworshipped Gods.

And anyone who has had experience with such entities, feel free to comment or reblog with add-ons!

[…] Brady may be best-known as a TV personality from series including “Whose Line Is It Anyway?” and “Let’s Make a Deal,” but he got his start in the theater and has made a habit of coming back to it. On Broadway, he’s had stints in “Chicago” (as Billy Flynn) and “Kinky Boots” (as Lola), and in L.A. he’s appeared at the Wallis in “Merrily We Roll Along” and at the Hollywood Bowl in “Rent.” He talked with Variety about his current stage foray in the musical phenomenon “Hamilton.”

*You’re starring in the biggest musical hit to come along in years.*

I’m a fan. I think I’ve seen it eight times. I thought, “Oh my God, I need to be in this.” I love anything that changes the paradigm or breaks down a wall of perception. It may sound corny, but every night I am moved close to tears during the bow because I’m so happy. Because I’m part of something big. Sometimes when you have a name, you are the big thing in the room at that time. But with this, I’m just a piece of this. And it’s awesome.

*The show feels particularly resonant now, in the days after the Trump inauguration.*

Not only did Lin[-Manuel Miranda, the musical’s creator] show us what a complete badass Hamilton was, what a flawed man, what a great man, what a motivated man, what an amazing story he had — His story truly is the American dream. In the day and age of “Make America Great Again,” and people talking about who has the right to be an American, this show completely knocks on that door.

*How did you get involved?*

I’ve been friends with Tommy [Kail, the director] and Lin and that crew for awhile, and I think it was maybe a year into “Hamilton” that I kind of just nonchalantly threw my hat in. And then it became not so nonchalant. I was like, “Hey, could this work out? Are you interested? Could this be a thing?” So we started talking about it, and I knew that this is something you’ve gotta prove you can do, so I said, “I’d love to come in and audition.” So I flew myself back to New York and I sat in the casting office with everybody else. It’s weird auditioning for people you call your friends, but if you love what you do, you humble yourself to get yourself where you need to go.


*What’s your take on the role of Burr?*

I only knew [Tony winner] Leslie [Odom Jr.’s] take on Burr, which by virtue of being the first was the definitive Burr. And then I made it a point to watch Joshua Henry [who initially played the role in Chicago]. I did a lot of reading on the relationship between Burr and Hamilton, and I received a lot of books for Christmas, too, once my family found out I was doing it. I thought about what I loved about Burr and how I could make mine different, and the thing I came away with is: If you look at this show sideways, Burr is the more sympathetic character. Hamilton had this fire and this want and this desire to plow through the world and make his mark. Burr wanted to be successful, too, but he wanted to do it his way — “talk less, smile more” — get through life on your deeds, do what you gotta do. He was just as driven, but it was understated. I connected with that piece of Burr. He was trying to let his work talk for him. I feel like that’s my story, in a way.

*What’s the reaction from audiences been like?*

This audience is rabid. Chicago feels like a town that has its own franchise baseball team: They are very, very loyal. “Hey, this our Burr.” I walk down the street and people say, “Hey, Wayne!” It’s like being a baseball player who just got drafted to the local team, and everybody knows about it. I start off the show with the very first line, and I walk out and I just hear this deafening roar. It’s so loud I have to really trust that my sense of rhythm is acute, so I don’t lose the first piece of the song. The first night I came out and heard that, I felt like I was back in high school. Like it was my first time on stage ever.

*What’s your favorite song to perform?*

From a physical viewpoint, I love “The Room Where It Happens.” You really have to think it through, and you jump off the table, and then you do a dance at the end. But the song that really means something to me is “Dear Theodosia,” the song Burr sings to his daughter. Because every night I see my daughter. […]

Storytelling In The Superkick Era

A couple of weeks ago, I was asked to imagine what an fake fanfic entitled “Plan B” would be about. My brain conjured a Bayley heel turn, led and influenced by Demon King Finn Balor, ushering in a new era of evil with Bayley as his Demon Queen. As with most things I do, it got out of hand, I wrote an actual fic about it, and now every time I see a picture of Bayley I imagine how cool she’d look with the Demon paint on. Heel!Bayley went from ridiculous to I Want This Now, because as stupid as it sounds, my brain was able to create a compelling story around it. That’s like, kinda how wrestling in general works.

But you can’t turn Bayley heel, and it’s not because she already got her doctorate in Hugonomics. It’s because in a given WWE crowd, a good 5% of people will be wearing “I’m A Hugger” t-shirts. Shit, John Cena and the Hardys can’t even retire their horribly dated ring looks, because they have a brand to uphold. If something changes about a character, their merch becomes outdated and unsaleable. With merch sales emerging as maybe the most vital profit stream for many promotions, it locks characters and situations in for very long terms. I could see heel turns and face turns becoming much fewer and further between, very telegraphed and obvious, and not changing the wrestler’s overall brand much. People whose gimmick relies on their alignment (in the D&D sense) will be particularly locked in. For example, AJ Styles can be The Phenomenal One whether he’s heel or face, but heel!Bayley can’t be A Hugger. 

Kenny Omega is another great example of this. There is/was a really compelling story going on with Kenny and the Bullet Club. Kenny’s long ago outgrown the Bullet Club, so story-wise, it made sense to seed a breakup, or at least dissension in the ranks. In a world where storylines were constrained by company finances and butts in seats, one could even dream of a face turn, a return to angel cherub queer blonde Kenny, The Golden Lovers reunite to destroy the title scene together; a trail of blood and rainbows in their wake. Yes, silly and unlikely (I’m more proving a point than anything), but still a possible outcome of an intra-faction feud. 

But it currently seems like that Bullet Club drama ended with a heartfelt in-ring hug after Kenny won the US title. The “feud”, such as it was, went exactly nowhere, developed no one’s character, and achieved some momentary drama at best. In fact, I fear that with merch sales being paramount, wrestling storytelling is going to have to become episodic, like a sitcom, in order to preserve marketability. Like, there’s still gonna be conflict, but everything’s back to normal by the end of the half hour and no one has changed. To keep the Bullet Club and The Elite and Kenny Omega shirts flying off the racks in Hot Topic, it must be thus. 

Of course the self-appointed torch-bearers of this era are the Young Bucks, and they’ve had incredible success. They have always, like, actually scoffed at the idea of storytelling, like that’s for smarky losers who don’t like superkicks and dick jokes enough. They practically get off on the fact that people accuse them of “killing the industry”—it’s become a feather in their cap. So why would they care if their merch-driven model of wrestling success meant that storylines and characters couldn’t really change all that much? As long as they continue to have the financial success they’ve garnered, the lesson will be that lulz and cool merch sell. Promotions will follow their example, and create storylines around selling merch.

If you don’t care about kayfabe, nbd, but if you do, this is a hugely kayfabe-breaking paradigm. You know Fale just came out with some new merch, so unfortunately he is not getting sent to Hell anytime soon. So, yeah, the whole damn world in Bullet Club shirts, but my god at what cost?

Stories (A BnHA Fanfic)

Word count: 1440

Rating: T

Summary: Shinsou Hitoshi wants to rewrite the stories that he tells himself.

Notes:  Inspired by a fantastic piece by @animeaves, please check it out! They are very talented and deserve all the recognition they can get! You can find it here! Thanks to @sugarmagic for the beta and thank you for reading this!

TW for some violence and depictions of bullying.

Keep reading

anonymous asked:

can u please rec some rentboy fics? thank u!

I can :)

Unhook the Stars by jad (62k)
“Love is like a Rubix Cube: there are countless wrong twists and turns, but once you get it right, it’s perfect no matter how you look at it.” Seventy-thousand words of pornographic discourse between two boys-turned-men that still haven’t learned how to communicate like normal people – with words. Guest appearances by Pansy Parkinson, Neville Longbottom, Hermione Granger, Blaise Zabini, Teddy Lupin, Gregory Goyle, the Weird Sisters, ex-wives, several Weasleys, a Boggart, and a Honey Badger. 

Another Mask Behind You by lettered (116k)
Draco is a high-end prostitute who hides his identity.  Harry unknowingly hires him.  And then there is porn, questions about identity, domestic bliss, more porn, and truth as seen through a web of lies. 

Number Seven by Sara Holmes (265k)
Harry already has two children, an ex-wife, annoying colleagues and an international crime ring to deal with. So when Draco Malfoy reappears after eight years AWOL in France, of course Harry is going to leave him well alone…Right?

Gone Down the Angel On a Lonely Night
by @femmequixotic (17k)
Eight years after the end of the war, Harry stumbles upon Draco in an unexpected place: Islington.

Kiss A Boy in London Town (And Other Intimate Misadventures of A Society Whore) by @femmequixotic (36k)
There’s only one cardinal sin for a whore.

Touch Me Fall by lumosed_quill (23k) 
Malfoy was such a ponce. And he was a complete snob. And he was so fucking fit Harry wanted to jump him where he sat. It would be too easy to forget his objective tonight: to really, really, really get Malfoy out of his system.

Breaking the Line by Kedavranox (19k)
Draco was a Dom for hire. Harry was his best client. But Harry disappeared and now Draco’s retired.
Draco’s doing fine (he’s even attending parties!) but who should show up to the latest BDSM shindig, but Harry Potter himself?
Can Draco play with his ex-client without breaking the line?

Paradigm by Cheryl Dyson (57k)
Harry Potter is an Auror and Draco Malfoy is a rentboy, but this is not a typical rentboy story.

Kisses are for Lovers by kjmom1 (22k)
Draco is a high class prostitute famous for taking clients virginity and doing it with a tenderness and care so they feel loved. Harry comes to him for the same treatment.

Shameless by QueenyMidas (50k)
Coming around on his third year in the local Escort service, Draco gets a new client that surprises him. Harry Potter, after having dropped out of the Auror academy a few years back, finds his life without direction or meaning when he orders a helping hand. Along with an Auror investigation gone wrong, once-separated lives intertwine again in a mess of scandal and moral ambiguity. EWE, disregarding Colin’s death.

The Shadowy Corners by Kedavranox (29k)
Fifteen years after the war, Draco is still struggling to survive. Living in squalor and under heavy Ministry restrictions, Draco takes Pansy’s advice on an option he had never thought to consider before. A means to regain everything he lost and more, courtesy of the wizarding hero –Harry Potter.

…and with persons even worse by leela_cat (14k)
Someone’s killing rentboys in Lower Knockturn, and the case is getting attention from the top. No one at the Ministry wants another Ripper, stalking Knockturn Alley or moving into Muggle London. Harry Potter agrees to go undercover, but can he keep his identity a secret when Draco Malfoy is the rentboy assigned to show him the ropes?

Coins by inell (2k)
Coins make a certain jingling sound whenever they are tossed onto the top of a wooden bureau.

Railway Lands by Maelipstick (65k)
Draco finds his own way to cope with being a failed Death Eater at Voldemort’s headquarters. Voldemort finds a way to destroy the wizarding world even after his death. Harry is trying to hold the world together while his mind quietly comes apart.

Let the Poets Pipe of Love by bookshop (12k)
Harry is a virgin, Draco is a hooker, but when they get together they have nothing but fun sex fights—well, something like that.

The Spiritual Side of the Political Shift

The first thought that came to me was - I feel very neutral about the whole thing and for some reason I’m not triggered by this at all. If you look at every social network, news columns, article comments and everywhere in the collective people are suddenly plagued with RESISTANCE. 

Resistance = Resistant towards change and the truth. When we are resistant we’re fighting the current flow of our present reality. We’re instead resisting the present moment of the NOW. 

So as an energy reader this is fascinating to me because what I currently see is a WHOLE LOTTA PEOPLE Plagued with cognitive dissonance. These people are blantantly resisting to accept their present experience. 

Another thing I feel is because it is triggering so many people subconsciously, we are behaving reactively towards the situation - Essentially it’s bringing out unconscious fears and insecurities that we have over our reality. 

what’s interesting about this is a TON of people right now are having their illusions ripped out right in front of them. Now see this is really big here if you think about it. This means a MILLION people or more are being blantantly triggered by their illusions. They are starting to have their paradigm dismantled. 

And from what i’ve learned about resistance is if we feel this way - what is offending us is our missing link towards transformation. It’s a truth we need to see withn ourselves. 

What does this really mean? 

It’s hard to say but what i’m feeling is a whole lotta people right now are being triggered collectively and having their illusions come crashing down on them. This could drastically effect the collective consciousness. This kind of ripple is intriguing because it could definitely trigger vast amounts of awakenings. 

Strangely this occurrence is smack dab in the middle of the 11.11 startgate. THIS IS SO WEIRD. There are no coincidences. 

There is a huge paradigm shift in progress and those triggers from the election are really sending a catalysm energy into the air. This is both good and bad because it’s really hard to say what that could mean collectively. 

BUT this new information coming through - it has to mean deep down something good is in the works. Something is building and growing in the undercurrents of society. For that much resistance we are building tension and MASSIVE energy expansion. This is peculiar because it’s directly showing me we are changing and evolving as a society. 

We no longer are sitting by being blinded by the illusions -we’re starting to collectively see the truth. And to see the truth makes us question. It makes us question our security, our safety and most of all our reality. 

In short, my awareness sees this as a positive. 


we have to take the bad with the good but for some reason intuitively I feel safe, I feel all is meant to happen and maybe this change is the ripping of illusions that people need to have their paradigm busted.

I’m personally feeling kinda neutral about the whole thing - I think the dramatization is really moreso based on the fact that we have anxiety for our future. YET this future is something that hasn’t happened yet…we don’t know what is going to happen. But feeding the fear and hating eachother isn’t exactly helping either.

 All is meant to happen for a reason we are either stirring in blantant resistance, resisting the change or we can move forward with our lives. It’s up to you - it’s your choice. The universe has our back <3

Step out of fear loves,
until next time, Ash


Brilliant Shadows is now live on Kickstarter.  Head on over and take a look!

Overall, there is an astounding lack of variety and diversity in the world of mainstream gaming. Gender, race, and sexuality are often not present in modern games or eroticized when they are.  

Brilliant Shadows will attempt to break this paradigm by featuring a lesbian protagonist along with a slew of supporting characters that run the gamut in terms of both ethnicity and sexual orientation.

 While the focus of Brilliant Shadows is on adventuring through a fantastical world filled with danger and magic, we wanted to incorporate characters that would be reminiscent of the people you interact with everyday.

“W Two Worlds is an excellent drama. Usually I can predict the plot of the stories very easily. It wasn’t like that this time. There were very surprising twists of events that I couldn’t foresee. Well done for the writers and producers of the show! “

Similar Confession:

“W two worlds is brilliant and clever and fresh, with the meta game going on it’s funtioning in a whole another level, breaking the rules, antiquated paradigms and going against the dramaland establishment. I’m so in love with this drama because it’s more than just a drama. But people are not used to such a brainy show that force you to be actively aware of the narrative and also it helps if you have some knowledge about the works both author and director are referencing. “

The Dimensions of Time: Dismantling the Old Paradigm

So I’ve been noticing this pattern of people and starseeds particularly having a harder time dealing with 3d perception or in general just a hard time dealing. My guess on this is that as we move more into the heart center, the old paradigm is breaking even further. The old systems just aren’t working anymore and it’s starting to show through our actions, our thoughts and most definitely our emotions. 

Another thing I keep hearing from others is there is this intense emotional wave that is coming over people. One of my healing friends mentioned it feels like the summer of expansion of the heart center and i couldn’t agree more. The Universe is really getting in touch with our emotional body and these high emotional bursts are as if the heart is opening and opening taking in these new energies of unconditional love from the Earth’s galactic core. The sudden urge to cry, express yourself truthfully, lots of honesty(lies are much harder to believe anymore, you see right through them), and there is this vulnerability. A very raw honest emotional state if i had to pinpoint it. I believe this inability to deal is because there is a friction in the air, it’s as if the old paradigm and the new paradigm are kinda straddled between us bouncing off of each other. It would be the catalyst of entropy in many ways because the old energy and the new are building up like a huge ball that is snowballing.

We’re essentially straddled between worlds and it’s starting to weigh in on us. The whole feeling tired of the old energy is because this is our past selves, letting go of 3rd dimensional perception, dualistic thinking. Releasing the old self, the old 3d self is dying and the New soul of evolved consciousness is being reborn. Now we are awakening into 4-5th perception which is more in balance between the mind and the heart. It’s the mind-heart unification again. So to work out the kinks we’re going to encounter that teeter totter feeling of moving back and forth between the two. It’s a very surreal feeling. Like yesterday i felt very nostaligic, not motivational and just more inner with my thoughts and memories. Then the next day i felt very motiviational and very external bouncing with energy. It’s as if I kept wanting to go inside myself rather than interact with people then the opposite happened the next day. wtf? Then what’s funny is i see others encountering the same feelings! 

So truthfully this is a powerful message deep down, this means we are releasing the old paradigm and the old structures are breaking within the system. Our old karmic self is dying and our new evolved soul is being reborn. Our memories of the old are releasing and we are opening the door for ourselves to operate more from a unified place between the heart and mind rather than just strictly the mind. This opens the doorway to possibilities and infinite probabilities.  This also ties into 8 circuitry theory that one of my followers mentioned. We’re moving more into the 5th and 6th circuits and upon a little research as the Tree of life is ridiculously interconnected between the circuits it also got me into dimensions. If 1-4 are more left hemisphere, material ego world of thought and we’re moving more into the 5th and 6th this would translate to moving out of the 4th dimensional and into the 5th-7th triad. 

I found an awesome theory that i wanted to share, let’s break this down…

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This is the tree of life and you see in this diagram, each sephiroth (Malkuth, Hod, Netzach, etc)  is connected to a different Circuit. The circuits are divided by dimensions of perception within our consciousness. As you see the number, for instance 1 is the bio-survival circuit connected to the Root Chakra and Maluth, the kingdom and so forth. The beauty of the Tarot is that the tarot cards also represent the Tree of Life which is a model for our Universe and our unified Consciousness, everything is a symbol! So pay attention Tarot lovers if you don’t already know this :)

I stumbled on a forum by accident talking about the circuits and one person broke the circuits down into the dimensions. Let’s see if they line up with the chakras as well. 

“The bio-survival circuit (1) correlates to the first dimension. The first dimension is a line, so for any creature being aware of only this dimension, there are only two choices available for reacting to a stimulus: approach or flee/attack. One can only travel forwards or backwards on a line. 

(Isn’t the Root chakra always about our surivival instincts, adrenal, fight or flight? Etheric Body, First dimension/bio-surivial circuit is what we experience as a baby, our primal instinctual self. Dimension 1 is time (physical motion.))  

The emotional circuit (2) correlates to the second dimension. This circuit formed on Earth when animals (vertebrates) appeared and started competing for territory. The second dimension can be seen as a plane, a grid divided up for territory. 

(The emotional circuit is about up-down, raw emotions, separation of behavior, this starts when we first learn to walk, Also connected to our senses, Sacral chakra, Emotional Body, 2nd dimension is a grid.  Dimension 2 is feeling (emotional motion.) )

The dexterity-symbolism circuit (3) correlates to the third dimension. When animals think in the third dimension, they can apply logic and start to use tools, because they can imagine objects in 3D even when they can see only one side of an object at a time. The analogy "depth of thinking” comes from the idea of the third dimension of depth. 

( Solar Plexus, The Divine Will, how we triangulate the universe and create our reality.  This is where the maturation of the Ego mind takes place. Our personal Power. 3rd dimension is always about polarities, dualism, good vs evil, separation of spirit and ego. Our Mental Body. Dimension 3 is thought (mental motion.) )

The socio-sexual circuit (4) correlates to the fourth dimension. This circuit has to do with the transmission of culture, including morals and behaviors, across generations, which deals with the passage of time, a direction in the fourth dimension. 

(The Fourth dimension is always talking about Time because it is laced in paradox. The heart is connected to the Astral body it is our driving vehicle, the station of the Merkaba. This is where energetic cords are created. The socio-sexual circuit is often associated with Oxytocin, the hormone chemical of love. You feel this chemical during childbirth, when you first fall in love or whenever you move into your heart center. Dimension 4 is spherical separation) 

The neurosomatic circuit (5) correlates to the fifth dimension. When a consciousness is at the fifth circuit, the individual is aware of endless possibilities. This can be seen as a perception of the waves of probability of the fifth dimension. 

(The 5th dimension, endless probabilities. The Neurosomatic circuit allows us to see into multi-dimensional reality instead of strictly space-time. It allows a fluid perception of our consciousness. The ability to see past-present and future as ONE, the unified self operating from Present Time of NOW. We encounter this circuit during smoking Pot or anything of similar nature.  The etheric template. This is the THROAT chakra, our communication source, the barrier into telepathy and interchanneling of frequency. How you know what another is thinking….Pure Starseed territory here ;) Dimension 5 is circular separation. ) 

The neuroelectric circuit (6) correlates to the sixth dimension. “The characteristics of this circuit are high velocity, multiple choice, relativity, and the fission-fusion of all perceptions into parallel science-fiction universes of alternate possibilities.” It is here that we can consciously choose which waves of probability we want to work with to create a reality. 

( Well we all love dimension 6 because it is home to our Third eye and pineal gland perception. The Mind’s EYE. The inner self. Where our Intuition and inner feelings are most activated. Our celestial Body. This is the circuit where the mind becomes aware of itself. Metaprogramming. This is where Telepathic communication becomes the norm and opens the door for intercommunication. People with only left brain circuitry won’t understand this level yet. Dimension 6 is linear separation.

The neurogenetic circuit (7) correlates to the seventh dimension. Describing a point in the seventh dimension as infinity recalls the perceptions of reincarnation and immortality that comprises the seventh circuit. 

(The thousand petaled lotus, Divine Enlightenment sung by the Crown. 
this circuit is connected to our past life memories, our genetic DNA structure, the akashic records, our unconscious, it is the connecting source of Christ consciousness into the God-source of IAM.  This is the Ketheric Template, Where one knows they are ONE with the divine God/Goddess within themselves. Dimension 7 is electric energy, the building block of physical matter. )

The neuro-atomic circuit (8.) correlates to the eighth dimension. It’s not neccessary for a consciousness to be housed in a physical body in order to experience this circuit. The eighth dimension encompasses different infinities, just as in the eighth circuit “space-time is obliterated; the speed of light barrier is transcended,” showing different initial conditions for the creation of a universe. “

(The 8th Chakra is the Soul Star chakra that helps communicate to your higher self. It also contains our karmic residue and karmic bonds we carry on into this life. It connects into Ascension and Ascended beings/Masters. The Serpent of Kundalini ascended past the Crown…The 8th circuit is our connection to DMT, how we operate outside of Time and Relativity.  Time Travel of intergalactic consciousness. Dimension 8 is magnetic energy, the primal field of the universe.)

OF course there are higher Dimensions as this reality is composed of over 13 but these are bases of our consciousness(the human mind/body spirit) not the universal consciousness of the multiverse.  I believe we’re opening ourselves to the higher circuitry of consciousness 5-7 eventually 8. The dimensions are endless but this is truly only the beginning of Learning to see inside of our growing Evolved Souls of Consciousness. 

Thoughts, feelings, opinions welcome <3

Post-apocalyptic Mr. and Mrs. Smith. 

It was a toss-up to me whether or not I should make the family members scared of the apocalypse or holding their own, but we’ve all seen Rick Potion 9, and I like that Jerry is one of those people for whom the collapse of society was the best thing that ever happened to him. Forego your precious status quo and say hello to Mr. Crowbar. 

Of course in Rick Potion 9, Beth breaks the delicate continuity paradigm over her knee when she realizes her father’s a loser, so in this apocalypse, I’ve decided the paradigm is 10,000x stronger when she realizes he’s an axe-wielding badass. Did I mention all these are on the same canvas? You’ll get that in a bit I promise. 

We're in the Middle of an Energy Gateway

I’ve been having a bunch of revelations this weekend and it’s been very inspiring to me so i’d thought i’d share. I think part of this is due to the Cardinal grand cross and these two eclipses smack dab between them. I don’t know about you guys i’m seriously loving this energy, it’s the energy for miracles. 

If i were to write a recap, My understanding is that Winter was all about confronting our shadow self/antithesis, confronting our past dead on and dealing with those deep old memories we had buried within our souls. One thing we deeply learned from Winter’s energy was that we all need eachother, it was about connection. Seeing ourselves in eachother as we are a collective mind. We also saw how we kept reliving past memories like a recycling of previous experience.  Winter was all about introspection, reflection and dealing with deep internal issues of ourselves and our darkness. i felt like Winter’s energy gave us this snowball effect that led up until the Spring Equinox which was a pure initiation point. The light started returning, we felt less foggy spiritually.

After the equinox, we started feeling a bit more in control and revelations started returning, spiritual mojo started coming back and it was as if everything was starting to turn…a big turning point for the collective. Then we felt like there was an anxious energy for April, a lot of people felt that, the closer we got the more we felt it. These eclipses are all about yin/yang energy masculine and feminine. If we were to translate that into consciousness, the Lunar eclipse was all about feminine energy and the solar eclipse is all about masculine energy, which is a HUGE unification and union of the god/goddess archetype of kundalini flow(ida and pingala). Smack dab between a beautiful and transformation alignment(13 13 13 13 GATEWAY/STARGATE ) with mars retrograde and oppositions. We have the perfect formula for ridiculously deep change, transformation and the ability to start breaking down paradigms. 
I posted all i possibly could on this cardinal grand cross because it felt vastly important and if you go back into the archive you can see a lot more details on what the cardinal grand cross holds…

So around the Lunar Eclipse energy, i kept having these very lucid dreams that i was writing about on here, where i would be in a dream scenario and then something would happen either a fear or i would just flat out say ‘i don’t want to be here anymore or i don’t want to be in this situation anymore’ then i would literally teleport out and land into this void space of total darkness where i would be flying/swimming in a pool of darkness. this dream haunted me because i kept experiencing the same dream about 6 times within the past week or so. As you guys know i am all about dream symbols and paying attention to symbols/patterns/deja vu within dream world and waking reality. Then i started having this song also haunt me called Original Sinsuality by Tori amos, particularly this part about gnostism: 
I’m calling you
You are not alone
I say
You are not alone
In your Darkness
You are not alone

Which also reflected back to the dream i was having…Well Adam and I had a relaxing day to ourselves since baby is sleeping all night now and decided to take 4-ho-mipt which is a beautiful tryptamine, very light, angelic, gentle and it just had this miraculous mental clarity. It was like encountering an old friend. The beauty of tryptamines is they are so NORMAL and real. The previous day before the trip i was so nostalgic recalling deep old wounds, old aspects or myself and just being really reflection, a friend of mine i was talking to that day said “it’s good to be nostalgic but don’t get trapped in your old memories instead think of them through the heart” Which really stood out to me. 

Then that night on the miprocin i had this beautiful vision of a door, that would bend and contract and i saw it opening, thinking it as a gateway that we were stepping through like a portal Into another world. This other world was here, in the now, inner stillness deep stillness, pure present vision. I realized i was the door and the gateway all along. we’re creating the new paradigm right now and we all have the choice to open that door ourselves. There are some more aware than others but if you’ve been paying attention things are truly changing and shaping our new paradigm. We are building the foundation right now as we learn to step into ourselves and reclaim our minds. 

Now the dream i was still questioning even in this state and it just came to me….Remember winter and how we felt we were stuck in old memories? That’s because many are still stuck in their old memories and are choosing to pick a direction to take! Some of the collective is still stuck in 3rd dimensional thinking and they are stuck within their old memories not realizing that when they are present and embrace inner stillness they are already free. We are creating the new paradigm with our ACTIONS in the now! This is also why manifestation is getting much easier because when we operate from the NOW, we can manifest with the law of attraction. That dream i had about teleporting into a black void space/darkness was because that world isn’t created yet! We’re stepping out of the 3rd paradigm to awaken the new, We’re READY to start creating our new reality but we can’t do this alone we have to do this together.

We have to think about this from both standpoints. We are a collective mind and if people who are still trapped in 3d fears start thinking in fear in the higher paradigm those fears would manifest into reality. All is projection all is mind. Your soul is a co-creator of the multiverse and what you think and desire is what you project into your world, your reality. What we think we become, Life is very magical ;)

You cannot let fear rule your reality any longer, the past is over, don’t let old memories haunt you and rule your life. Stop being on recycle! Our karmic bonds are released if you let them.  It is time to start creating our dreams, our wishes, our desires, our peace of mind into this reality. Don’t let fear define you anymore, you are free. 

The future isnt written and it is yours for the taking, how do you wish to see it, how do you want to create the new world, how do you want to see the new paradigm? this is what you want to ask yourself and tell yourself, write a list of things that are holding you back and then write a list of positive affirmations of what you want to create, who do you want to be, what do you want to do, where do you want to live,etc. We need to impact ourselves with NEW IDEAS and NEW EXPERIENCES to clear the old memories and wipe out the karmic ones. If we were Neo in the Matrix we would be getting the “reboot” program which is why we keep seeing repeats and deja vu. Do you feel stuck in a rut or stagnant? This is because you are still deciding on a direction to take. It’s like after the procession, we entered a point of blank slate and many didn’t see that ascension definitely DID happen. Well what would happen if we were to align with a new Paradigm? Our old memories would surface for clearing because we would see we don’t need our karmic bonds anymore! 

This is high tide those that are awakened and see the truth to step into their grace and truth. Reclaim yourselves and your multifaceted soul. Realize the multidimensional being that you are and are becoming if not already. the barriers are lifted and your chains are released, the alignment is in place, the gateway is open, and it is time you realize you are the Door all along. 

Ascension is here, Ascension is you. The ticket to ascension is seeing that you have already ascended into the NOW. the present moment, see that you are the vehicle connecting the bridge between the spiritual world and material world to operate your consciousness at a higher oscillate. You are the one you’ve been looking for, the answers are inside of you as the universe is inside of you. We are creating a new universe and a new paradigm that is awakening the new evolution of this planet’s crystalline core structure. The veil is breaking and our old memories are returning to be cleared, our energy is changing as our nervous system is also changing. The new structures are in place and now we are learning to walk now that we have learned who we are as  infinite co-creators of reality. 

This message will either bring harmony or cognitive dissonance, but either way it’s bound to shake a few of you and see that it is time we stop living in our past and stop hitting replay, it’s time to hit play and let our present actions by choice create our reality. We are all made for this potential within ourselves, we need to communicate, we need to open ourselves up, we need to listen to others frequencies and see the mirror of ourselves within them. We are all ONE collective mind, each versica piscis linking to the next to create The Tree of Life within the multiverse. It is time to believe in not only ourselves but the faith of the universe for we are one <3

Don’t get stuck in your own blackhole ;)

Instead learn to stay conscious in the 


Imagine. believe. create.

love <3

Codependency versus Independency

This is a forum response.

I don’t think either Stefan or Caroline is the other’s salvation or damnation, per se.

It’s very important to understand that Caroline has never been with anyone like Stefan before. Not even close. Her previous boyfriends have been rather grounded people and actually not very passionate. They aren’t the kind of people who would really go with “love above all”.

Stefan is a love addict. He’s an addict period, but in all honesty I think this is a bigger problem for him than the blood.

Caroline seeks control because that is who she is and that is how she’s comfortable. Stefan seeks control because without it he murders entire villages.

Neither the dispassionate and detached mindset nor its opposite is ideal and when people from the two sides of the spectrum come together it changes them both for the better.

I think this is the first time Caroline has ever thought something like “I don’t know if I can live without him” and I think that scares the hell out of her. At the same time it’s completely irresistible. This will not make her completely “codependent” but it will draw her towards that polarity. That shouldn’t necessarily be viewed as a bad thing. To an extent it is good to depend on people. The only person completely independent of others is one who does not care for others at all. Will she make mistakes? Absolutely certainly. She’s drawn out of her comfort zone. This is new territory.

Does it sound weird that I am talking like this when in all honesty, Stefan hasn’t really given away his hand, hasn’t come with any grand declarations of love, et cetera? Maybe, but the thing is that the “all-consuming love” is always on the table for Stefan, and that shows. When they kissed, Caroline had never been kissed like that. In that moment she was the absolutely only thing that existed in the world for him. If you aren’t used to that kind of people and you fall for one, it is overwhelming. Even “small” moments come to hold more meaning. The boy in question simply taking your hand is enough to shortcut all higher brain functions.

For Stefan this love might be even more important. As I said he is a love addict, and for one hundred and fifty years his drug of choice has been a pretty girl with long brown hair and a slightly hoarse voice. He met her as a teenager, lost her as a teenager and relived her through a replica of adolescent love. His relationship with Elena was never healthy. Katherine “wrote the book” on relationships for him and he could never truly break that paradigm with her doppelganger.

He’s had many lovers and many flings but nobody he really took serious except her. If he hadn’t taken Caroline seriously he’d banged her without a second thought.

He met Caroline as a friend and thus Caroline has seen a lot more of the real Stefan Salvatore than Elena has. He hasn’t felt the need to cover up and he hasn’t instinctively regressed to an immature self with her. This also explains how Elena had an easier time handling the relationship. Elena fell in love with a teenager. Caroline is falling in love with a giant - a brilliant man with eight times her life experience.

When Stefan kissed Caroline that was the first time that the adult Stefan Salvatore, in full possession of his faculties, ever kissed a girl and really meant it.

it’s really really shitty how showrunners are at a place where they’re letting (and expecting) fandom do the work they’re too lazy and entitled to do. Oh so Cap/Sam/Bucky are “the greatest love triangle in MCU history”? cool how about we see some of that love onscreen i.e why not have Sam lock lips with Cap or Bucky or each of them declare their feelings at some point? oh that’s right, this isn’t really about showcasing gay love, it’s about using and exploiting a subset of your viewers while continuing to avoid real, challenging, paradigm-breaking representation. this happens ALL THE TIME with these white dudebrow fests. BBC Merlin spent whole seasons REFUSING to develop their characters or advance the story because they knew if they just gave fandom enough scenes of merlin and arthur “bantering” or taking their shirts off people would tune in anyway and continue writing fanfics and making gifs and feasting on the “subtext” that will never be allowed to break the surface. same with BBC Sherlock. Same with Supernatural. Showrunners know what fandom thirsts for, they read the tweets and tumblrs, they know the formula for garnering slashdom interest and they run with it all the way to the bank. meanwhile, women of color/ queer women of color rarely appear onscreen, and when they do they’re quickly shafted or sidelined in favor of white male characters (see also: Merlin, MCU, Sleepy Hollow et al). and lemme tell you it’ll be cold day in hell before MCU lets chris evans share a kiss with anthony mackie onscreen. i’m not saying dont ship things or dont enjoy these films/shows. god knows i enjoy a lot of trash media. but i’m pissed that showrunners exploit and encourage the worst sort of trends in fandom with not a single effing drop of accountability.