box guard

Into The Dark

Originally posted by elves-n-angels

Words: 883

Prompt: Reader is recruited by HYDRA to get the Winter Soldier back. Things don’t go as planned when Captain America and others show up.

Warnings: None.

A/N: I’ve had this  idea for a while now, so I decided to write it and see where it goes. I  don’t have an exact pairing chosen just yet.


chapter 1


Y/N knew that her job would come with certain hazards, she worked for HYDRA, hazards were a given thing. Even then, being thrown into the middle of a superhero fight was not something she could have foreseen.


She adjusted her black backpack and hid behind a car, checking for any enemies. She grabbed an iron stick that had been forgotten by the car. She would need it if she encountered any agents. She hated it, fighting people, working for HYDRA, everything. She could feel the rejection her body had to the whole situation. She imagined herself dropping the stick and running away. Far from the airport, far from superheroes, labs, hell, even far from the country. But running away was not an option, she knew better. That would be selfish. Instead, she closed her eyes and shook her head, clearing her mind from such thoughts. She hold the stick tight and towards the jet. She had to do this.

She hurried keeping her body low, her hand that held the iron stick hiding in her back. She got the loading part of the jet and waited by the right side of the entrance. Two guards came out talking to each other. She hit the one closest to her in the head with the stick, knocking him out right away. She struck the other one before he could step out of his shock. She swiftly pushed the two unconscious guys to the side and made her way inside.

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The Bin, the creep, and the dryer

A/N: 3.1K of Sin Bin logistics, guys being dudes, and dudes being gross. I couldn’t stop laughing writing parts of this. It’s ridiculous. I’m sorry.


“Dex. Dex.”

Dex cracked an eye open. He’d been asleep on the green monstrosity, post-kegster. The light coming through the window was thin and gray, and he could hear Bitty in the kitchen, humming softly as he washed dishes. Ransom and Holster were not yet acting as cleanup crew, so they were presumably still asleep. Nursey was across the room, curled in an armchair. They’d rock-paper-scissored for the couch. The victor had surprised no one.

Standing over Dex was Chowder, his brows pinched and his hands fidgeting at his sides. “Dex,” he whispered fiercely.

“Huh?” Dex asked, tucking a yawn into his elbow.

“Dex, the dryer’s broken again.”

Dex sighed and sat up. He ran a hand over his face, wiping sleep away. “Sorry, Chow. It’s the best I can do.”

“It’s making… noises.”

“Yeah. It’ll work as long as you don’t put too much in it.”

“Dex, it sounds like it’s going to catch fire.”

“I know. We’re only $700 away from a new one. $400, probably, after last night.” After much debate, it had been the first kegster where they’d charged an entrance fee.

“This is the third day I’ve worn this pair of boxers.”

Yeah, they really needed that cash.

Dex blinked slowly, shook his head, breathed through his nose. “Ok. First, gross. Second, I – gross. Third, the washer still works. Hang up your laundry. I have a drying rack in my dorm. I don’t really need it, so I’ll bring it over.”

Chowder looked about to cry. “Thank you, Dex.” He grabbed the back of Dex’s head and rushed forward to kiss both his cheeks. By the time Dex could protest, he was already bounding up the stairs, hopefully to get his dirty laundry and fucking wash it. Dex personally hoped the others followed his example. There’d been a certain ambiance around the haus the past week.

Dex would bring over the drying rack, but a single drying rack could not handle the laundry of a haus full of hockey players. It would be a temporary solution, a bandaid over a bullet wound. He’d have to find a way to get the money soon.

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unguarded-guards  asked:

How's does someone who's has a high sex drive still intimately connect with someone who's ace? Im looking for a good middle ground but I haven't found a good solution. I find it super interesting how she doesn't react to anything physical (if it sexual, or not) but it also make me nervous to think it's a sign of previous abuse. :(

There are aces who are sex positive, and/or have a high sex drive. 

Every couple has their differing preferences for sexual intimacy. It doesn’t suddenly become impossible when aces are in the picture. Compromise is something allos have to learn too.

- Fae

DH2 stealth is like

Corvo/Emily: *leans out two feet from cover directly in front of guard* 

Guard: *doesn’t see a thing* 

Corvo/Emily: *observing distant patrolling guard through 1cm gap in stack of boxes* 

Guard: *DETECTION* 

Guard: *RINGS ALL THE ALARMS* 

Guard: *THROWS 10 GRENADES* 

Guard: *BRINGS 200 REINFORCEMENTS*

niavou  asked:

If we were dating I'd buy you a matching mouth guard and boxing glove set. Square up. I'm taking you down.

i accept ur proposal but be warned, my good friend, while u may try……u may not be successful. in fact, i wager u won’t be.

The academy awards office

the security guard on duty, shining a light on the best actor ballot box: what…. r u doing

me, wearing an all black cat suit shoving papers with Harry’s name on them in the box: nothing

The security guard: okay I get this cause he’s actually is nominated for this category but why did u shove ballots in the best actress award, the best director award, and the best screenplay award

me: *starts running*

on grief

Sometimes I think grief bowls you over because you just feel so exposed. Someone you love is gone, but more meaningfully, someone who loved you is gone. You feel the loss of a staunch supporter. A light is missing from your world and your eyes are having trouble adjusting. Their love was a shield and you’re getting anxious anticipating having to fend off attacks on your own.Their love was a balm and you don’t even know when to apply it to stave off infection. Even if there was a way to replace this irreplaceable person, you don’t have the faintest clue how to hold interviews, let alone what to say in the want ad. You’re hurting, and you miss them, and you’re so terribly exposed.

Rooftops: Mikey x Reader

WARNING: NONE

Requested by: Anonymous

Hello (⌒▽⌒) god I absolutely love you and your blog! Your an awesome writer! ♥‿♥ if it’s not to much trouble could you please write a Mikey x reader were the reader is on the roof playing video games on there laptop or something and he’s watching there cute reaction and then he trips and reveals himself but there super chill and invites him to play or chill with them please? Is this to pacific? I don’t want to pressure you I just thought this would be cute 😂

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I'm Just The Pizza Guy- Brendon Urie Imagine

~TW: domestic abuse~

You sit in your room with your best friend, watching some movie they had picked out. You were so engrossed in the film that when the door bell rang, you both jumped.

 "That scared the shit outta me.“ You say and stand up to go answer the door, fairly certain that it’s the pizza guy, the cute one that always flirts with you. He always delivers on the weekends and you just happen to always order on the weekends so you’ve met multiple times. He’s about your age but you wouldn’t know. Hell, you don’t even know his name but you kind of consider yourselves friends. You open the door and sure enough, there he is. 

 "Hey.” He smiles.

 "Hi. Oh my god, I can smell the jalapeño. It’s smells amaaazing.“ You absolutely love the little jalapeño pepper they put in each box of pizza. He laughs a little and you giggle, handing him the $20 bill and him giving you the pizza.

 "Keep the change,” this was no surprise to him at this point because you always let him keep it. 

 "Thanks.“ He shoots you a million dollar smile as he walks away. You just nod and shut the door. You take the box upstairs and put it on the bed next to (Y/F/N).

 "What took you so long?” They ask without taking their eyes off the tv and blindly grabbing a slice. You smile to yourself. 

 "Nothing.“

 ~~~~~~ANOTHER WEEK LATER~~~~~~

 "Get the fuck out of my house you fucking asshole!” Your boyfriend, Michael, pushes you roughly aside and storms towards the door.

 "Fuck you!“ He slams the door. 

You stand in silence for a few moments, not knowing what to do. Michael has never been the nicest guy but after he cooled down he was always so apologetic and you always forgave him. You always thought things would get better but they’re not. They’re actually getting worse. You reach your hand to touch your cheek where it was burning from the contact his hand made with your face a few minutes ago. This was nothing new; but today, for some reason it really made you think.

 You sit on the ground quietly sobbing into the sleeves of your hoodie when all of a sudden, there’s an knock on the door which makes you jump. You think it’s one of three things : Michael coming back to get his stuff, Michael coming back to apologise, or Michael coming back to make sure he shut you up well enough. The person knocks again and anxiety runs through your veins.

 "It’s Marie’s pizza!” A male voice yells through the door. You sigh in relief. 

“I forgot he made me order that fucking pizza.” You unlock and open the door to reveal a boy in a black tshirt and black jeans, holding a pizza box and a receipt. The boy smiles and hands you the pizza. 

 "Hey, stranger. Long time, no see.“ He laughs a little and you smile in return.

 "I saw you last Friday, doofus.” You hear him giggle as you dig the cash out of your pocket and hand it to him. You look up and he just stares at you for a couple seconds, as if he’s waiting for you to say something. You chuckle and roll your eyes. 

 "You know I don’t want change. Get outta here.“ He winks before turning and walking back to his car. 

You watch his long legs stride down the driveway before you shut the door, smiling to yourself. You set the pizza on the counter and go to get a plate from the cabinet. You pick up a slice and start to put it on the plate when you realise that you’re not gonna want to come back down for more so you just take the whole box up to your room and never come out the rest of the night.

 ~~~~~~~NEXT WEEK~~~~~~~~

 It’s Friday night again and of course, Michael is asleep in your bed as you shower, washing off the blood and dirt from the brutal beating you’d just received. He was not happy about that fact that you were talking to another boy besides him while he wasn’t around. You were only catching up with a friend but when he saw you it was all over. You have bruises up and down your arms, your ribs hurt, and you’re pretty sure you have a black eye. None of it matters though, it’s not anything some concealer can’t cover up, you never really leave the house anyway. You sigh and continue trying to wash away the pain as the pinkish coloured water runs down the drain.

 Once you’re done, you throw on some leggings and a tshirt and then put a hoodie on because your house seems so much colder than usual. For a second you think maybe it’s Michael’s presence that makes your house seem so less warm and cozy but you shake the thought, deciding it was stupid. You’re drying your hair with a towel when you hear a knock at the door. Pizza. It’s like the rainbow after the hurricane. This also means you’ll see the cute pizza boy. You almost skip to the door to answer it. When you open it you of course see the tall, skinny boy standing on your doorstep. You smile, glad to see him but his face drops. 

 "Oh my god, are you okay?” You wrinkle your forehead in confusion until you see his hand slowly reaching for your face and then you realise that you haven’t covered any of Michael’s damage up. His thumb gently strokes your cheekbone and you can feel the bruise forming there. 

 "Y-yeah. I’m fine. I just…get into trouble sometimes. You should see the other guy.“ You chuckle a little and his eyebrows draw up in sympathy, probably not buying your story at all. You don’t look like the type to get into fights.

 "Are you sure you’re okay?” He asks. You see him glance back in your house, looking for the person responsible for this but there was no one. You simply nod.  

“I promise.” You hold put the cash and he hands you the pizza skeptically but nods. 

 "O-okay. Enjoy your pizza.“ You smile and he does too before going back to his car.

 You set the pizza on the counter, ready to dig into the food but when you open the box, you’re caught off guard by a note written on the inside of the lid in what appears to be black sharpie. ‘I threw some extra peppers in for you :) -Brendon’ He even left a number on the receipt. You grin like an idiot.

 "So pizza boy has a name….” You quietly say to yourself as you pick up one of the jalapeños, taking a bite. You take your food to the couch and enjoy it a lot more than usual. You smile as you watch reruns of Friends on tv and text Brendon, the latter bring your main priority. You find out that he is even more adorable when you exchange more than 3 sentences with him. As you read his texts you could imagine his voice in your head. He was the only thing running through your mind all night and you weren’t made about it at all.

 *******BRENDON’S POV********* 

 It’s Saturday evening and the smell of 4 jalapeño peppers fills my nose as I drive the familiar road to (Y/N)’s house to deliver her pizza. For the past couple weeks, I’ve been putting extra peppers in her boxes since I found out she likes them so much. It’s been a week since I’ve seen her but putting my phone number on that receipt was one of the best decisions I’ve ever made. 

 I pull up at her house and fix my hair in my rear view mirror. I pick up the box and walk up to the door. I knock and hear yelling inside before (Y/N) opens the door. She barely gets the door open halfway before she’s forcefully pulled back by someone. She yells out in pain and then I realise that she’s actually in trouble. I set the pizza on the ground and push the door open to see her boyfriend grabbing her by the shoulders as she sobs and begs him not to hurt her. 

 "Hey!“ I yell. He turns to see me and shoves her to the ground as she whimpers.  

"What the hell do you think you’re doing?” I say approaching him.

 "Why don’t you mind your own damn business? Who even are you?“ He scowls at me.

 "I’m just the pizza guy…but I don’t let assholes like you go around beating up pretty girls." 

 *********(Y/N)’S POV*********** 

 All of a sudden you hear shoes scuffling on the ground and grunting from people being punched. You can’t even open your eyes to look because you’re basically having a panic attack. You didn’t want Brendon to get hurt but you couldn’t do anything. The yelling and punching goes on for about 3 minutes until you hear someone hit the floor, hard and you pray it’s not Brendon. Someone groans, taking the hits from someone else.

 "Don’t. Fucking. Touch. Her. Ever. Again.” You hear Brendon grit through his teeth in between either punches or kicks, you can’t tell. All you hear is Michael groaning in pain. 

 "Now get out! And don’t fucking come back.“ Brendon yells as you hear Michael shuffling out the house. You keep your eyes shut and stay curled up on the ground. You hear a sigh and the door shutting, then footsteps walking towards you. 

 ”(Y/N). (Y/N), it’s Brendon. It’s okay. He’s gone.“ He places a hand on your shoulder and you flinch a little then relax. You open your eyes and see Brendon kneeling next to you, hair messed up, falling in his face and his nose is bleeding a little. You immediately wrap your arms around his neck and he wraps his arms under you legs, picking you up and sitting down on the couch with you. 

 "Are you alright?” He asks, you could tell he’s concerned as hell. You nod your head and look up at his face again.

 "Are you okay? You know your nose is bleeding, right?“ He lets out a small chuckle and nods.

 You stand up and he stays seated on the couch, wondering what you’re doing. You hold out your hand and he takes it. You lead him upstairs to the bathroom and close the toilet lid, motioning for him to sit on it. He does so as you get the rubbing alcohol and some cotton balls from the mirror cabinet. You press the cotton ball against the opening of the bottle and tilt it down, soaking the cotton in alcohol. You stand in front of Brendon and start dabbing his cuts on his face and cleaning the spots of blood. He winces a little and you apologise but continue. Once you’re done he smiles and thanks you. You just sit on his lap, resting your head on his shoulder. Brendon wraps his arms around you and you guys just sit in silence for a few moments. 

 "You didn’t get in a fight, did you?” He asks referring to a couple weeks ago when he saw your black eye and bruised face. 

 "No.“ You whisper out as tears begin to fall down your face. Brendon sighs.

 "Oh my god…..how long has he been doing this to you, (Y/N)?” You stay silent for a couple seconds before answering. 

 "A few months. But if you would’ve asked me a few months ago if I thought it would end up this, I would’ve been offended that you’d even think Michael would do something like that.“ You shake your head in shame.

 "I don’t even know how this happened…” Your voice strains as you begin to cry harder. Brendon rubs your back, trying to calm you down.

 "Hey, look at me.“ You sniffle and sit up to be face to face with him. He uses his thumbs to wipe away your tears. 

 "He’s an absolute dick. He didn’t deserve to ever have you, alright?” His hands cup your face. 

 "And I just want you to know that I’d never ever hurt you in any way. I never want to see you cry. You’re too beautiful to cry.“ You sniffle and smile, looking down before you look up and place your lips on his. You can feel him smile into the kiss and you wrap your arms around his neck as your lips move in sync. You tangle your hands in his hair and grind your hips down a little which causes him to moan. You pull away to your my breath and he just smirks at you. 

 "Are you too injured to keep going?” He asks you and you shake your head, your chest rising and falling. 

 "Nope. You?“ You ask. 

 "Not at all.” He picks you up and starts carrying you to the closest bedroom with an open door.

 "Good. Let’s do it.“ 

 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 

 Here’s the second one! This ones kinda short and it was hard to edit and write cuz I’m on my phone but let me know what you think and requests are open! :)

 - Blue

Deserve This

Summary : Reap what you sew.

Warnings : Mentions of torture.

Word Count : 2,001 words

A / N : The continuation of ‘Not The Only Monster’ is here! I’m glad I finally freaking finished this part so I can focus on the next (and hopefully the last) part of this thing. Hopefully it’s good and makes sense and anyone who reads this will enjoy. 

Please be reminded once more that English is not my first language, and so if you find any grammatical error please point them out to me so I can learn to be better (:

Not The Only Monster || Deserve This || Not My Secret To Tell


Originally posted by winter-capricorn

Snow was falling lightly over you, pure white flakes dusting the landscape, over the headstone that stood rigidly in front of you;

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Land of Steel and Silicone

“It’s a Hardmode single-player planet like one in Caliborn’s session.

You might find yourself quite lost within the land of STEEL AND SILICONE, an endless sprawling labyrinth of a land. Unlike most easy-going planets, this land is one large planetary sized MIKE TYSON SPHERE, a dyson sphere packing the punch of BOXING OGRES and RINGLORDS, guarding elevators, thousands of miles of stairs and hallways, paths and sky scrapers, and an endless dome made entirely of the planet’s core, where you’ll be spending most of your time navigating.

The consorts are SILICONE MUTANTS (think gears of war basically) that fight in tribal wars constantly with plasma-splatters and matter-shooters, you will have to carefully choose your alliances and engage in this never-ending STRIFE in order to survive the core of your planet. With a ticking clock to it’s explosion, you must hurry to move the PRIME DETONATOR, a huge-ass bomb at centre of your planet to the outside of it in order explode it and send it into a black hole at your sessions centre. Failure to venture out before it’s timer sets will explode it prematurely.

The planet is kind of like the core of Derse basically but it’s all dark obsidian sky scrapers, towers, stairs and paths, etc on the inside which is where the quest takes place. It’s just a thick steel core shell on the outside with no real features.”


Oh wow this one took a long time. So much learned in making it though, including some severe limitations with some of 3dsMax’s distribution tools.

There were so many stages involved, that I’ve included some “making-of” pics after the break.

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Don’t Shave (Chris Evans)

Prompt: “You’re chasing me around the house because I have your razors and I won’t let you shave.” 

honestly I won’t ever let him shave Chris looks too good with a beard on

You wished that the 95-year-old virgin golden retriever of unwavering justice that your boyfriend plays as would actually go through a stage of a man’s life; growing out a beard. You met Chris when he had a beard, and he looked fucking fantastic with it. Whatever the hell the reason that Steve Rogers just somehow can’t grow a beard of his own is a bit infuriating for you. You don’t like it when Chris has to sacrifice his beard for the sake of his movies.

So, on the night before Chris’s last week he can properly spend with you, he told you that he was going to shave off his beard tomorrow because the filming of his next Marvel movie starts next week. After your conversation, you sneaked into the bathroom near the kitchens and grabbed his razors, scissors, shaving cream, anything that can possibly make his beard disappear and put them in a box. You hid that box on top of a cabinet above the sink where he would never find it if he went looking for it. 

When you went back to your living room, Chris was reading a book silently on the bed. He was scratching his beard, an action that made your stomach fill itself with butterflies. He looked up from his book and smiled at you. “Hi there, darling.” he greeted. He patted the space beside him, inviting you to sit beside him. You happily obliged and sat down, instantly having his arm wrap around your shoulder. Chris folded the top right edge of his page and closed the book, setting it to the coffee table in front of you and got comfortable next to you.

“Why can’t Steve grow a beard?” you blurted out quietly. Chris’s chest rumbled, indicating that he chuckled at your weird question. “Steve can actually grow a beard, but soldiers have to shave because it’s mandatory.” he replied. You scoffed and rolled your eyes, deeply annoyed by the fact that Chris has no other choice but to shave his beautiful beard for the sake of his super soldier character. 

“Oh, come on, he’s living in the twenty-first century, where bearded thirty-year-old men are putting glitter on their beards to celebrate Christmas.” you complained exasperatedly. Chris laughed. “I know, darling, but that’s just how it is. I’m gonna shave tomorrow, I’m sure you’ll understand.” 

Fortunately, he didn’t catch your little coy smirk.


The next day, you forced yourself awake.

You were relieved that Chris was still asleep beside you, the Dorito’s face half buried in his pillow and snoring lightly. You carefully got out of bed and made your way to the kitchen. You checked the box if it was still there and when you triple-checked if it was really there, you went down of the sink and began cooking breakfast. 

After a few moments, you hear footsteps coming towards the kitchen. You pretended to not notice his presence and continue cooking your bacon. A pair of strong arms wrapped around your waist and a face stuck itself to your hair, humming in satisfaction. “Morning, Cap.” you greeted. You placed the cooked and almost burnt onto the plate beside the stove. “Morning, darling.” he mumbled incoherently against your hair, kissing it affectionately.

You were done cooking and Chris removed himself from you. He sat down on the seat across from you and began wolfing down the bacon. You chuckled as you grabbed a strip of bacon to your mouth. Chris began staring at you lovingly and he put his chin on his palm.

“Y/N, have I ever told you how pretty you look every day?” he blurted out and grinned when you grinned at his compliment. “Many times now, Christopher. Many times.” you replied and grabbed another strip of bacon. Chris giggled.

After your breakfast, Chris went straight to the bathroom. You stayed in the kitchen to guard his box of razors. You snickered to yourself when you heard Chris frantically look for his razor. “Y/N, darling, where are my razors?

You giggled and said, “I don’t know, babe! Maybe you left them back at your home?” 

Chris emerged from the bathroom and gave you a suspicious look. “Y/N, where did you hide them?” he asked menacingly. You shrugged, exaggerating your shoulders a bit. “I don’t know, Chris.” you said innocently, batting your eyelashes. He smirked and went over to you, putting his hands on the counter beside your hips and trapping you. “Where did you hide them?” he asked again. Your mouth threatened itself to twitch into a grin and blow your cover as an innocent victim, but fortunately you fought it. 

“Chris, I don’t know.” you whispered. Chris still didn’t look convinced and still kept you trapped. “Ma’am, I don’t like it when people lie to me.” he warned, going into Steve Rogers mode. You raised an eyebrow. “And what happens to people who lie to you, Captain?” you teased him. He lowered his lips to your ear, his beard brushing against your cheek.

“They get punished, ma’am.” he whispered

You hummed, not believing his words. Steve Rogers could never torture a soul, but then this is Chris. You sighed, feigning fake defeat. 

“Okay, fine, I’ll get them, Chris.”

Chris was shocked when you submitted to him so quickly. You liked to put up a little fight to let him get what he wants. He turned a lot more shocked when you suddenly climbed up the counter and grabbed a black box from the top of the cabinet. “Oh, Y/N-”

You suddenly bolted out of the room, running out of the house and laughing loudly with the box of his razors in hand. Chris took a moment to get what was happening and ran out of the house to follow you. “Y/N GET BACK HERE YOU LITTLE SHIT!” he yelled as you made your way to the garage, getting back inside the house again. Without thinking that he could just go through the front door and catch you easier, he followed you into the door of the garage anyway because he was panicking. 

“Y/N!” he yelped when he ran in the living room, looking for any sign of you. He heard distant giggling coming from the kitchen and he instinctively followed it. When he found you, you held a spatula in your one hand and with the box on the other, trying to threaten him with the ridiculous weapon in your hand. Chris laughed before going into Steve Rogers mode.

“Ma’am, please give me back my razors.” he gently said before diving to the hand where you held the box. You dodged him successfully and ran out of the kitchen. You paused in the living room to stick your tongue out and tease him with your adorable come and get me! as you run back outside. 

Chris chuckled before running after you, wondering how he ended up with such a lovely girlfriend.


“Y/N, you can’t hide forever.” Chris called out.

Steve was frozen for 70 years! Nobody found him until 70 years later!” you called out and then frantically ran away from the garage when Chris’s fast footsteps began go near to where you were just hiding, instantly regretting responding to him. 

You’ve been running around the house for half an hour. Chris had those small temporary victory moments where he managed to catch you, but you left the box in your hiding place. You would run back to your hiding place when he lets go of you and grab the box from where you left it. 

You almost from your tangled feet, but you managed to enter the house again and lock the front door. You didn’t lock it quietly, though, and Chris heard the click it would make when it was locked. 

Chris was so fast in running back in the living room to get you that your natural instinct was to start panicking before running when he finally caught you in his arms, his right hand gripping the box so you won’t let go of it while his left arm gripped your waist tightly so you won’t escape him again. You thrashed in his arms as he carried you to the couch, whining about letting you go. Chris laughed and snagged the box in your hand, throwing it to the coffee table and sitting down on the couch with you sitting on his lap.

“Dammit!” you cried and laughed, slowly accepting your defeat. You laid back against Chris’s chest, panting heavily. You could feel his sweaty face press against your back. “You little shit.” Chris grumbled angrily and you laughed at his annoyance. You turned around in his lap, your foreheads pressing against each other as you relish in your exhaustion. Chris kissed your nose delicately and said, “Why?”

“I just don’t want you to shave.” you pouted.

He laughed. “You could’ve just said so and not make us run around the house in our pyjamas, Y/N.” he told you and pecked your lips. It was your turned to get annoyed. “Hey! I tried to tell you that I don’t want you to shave, but you still shave anyway!” you told him, crossing your arms across your chest. Chris hummed, smirking at you. “I’m a good listener, love. I just don’t like some of the stuff you say. Especially about your attachment issues with my beard.” 

You laughed. “I guess I do have attachment issues with your beard.”

DON'T STEAL FROM THE GODS

THOTH, THE GOD OF WISDOM, HAS A BOOK OF FUCKING MAGIC SPELLS. HE KEEPS IT IN A BOX WRAPPED IN AN IMMORTAL SNAKE, BURIED IN A HOLE IN THE DESERT FUCKING MILES AWAY FROM CIVILISATION.

PRINCE NEFREKEPTAH DECIDES HE WANTS TO BE A MOTHERFUCKING WIZARD, SO HE SETS OFF INTO THE DESERT TO FIND THE MAGIC BOOK AND STEAL THE SHIT OUT OF IT. 

EVENTUALLY HE FINDS WHERE THE MAGIC BOOK IS BURIED. UNFORTUNATELY, IT’S SURROUNDED BY FUCKLOADS OF SNAKES AND MOTHERFUCKING SCORPIONS. THE SNAKES AND SCORPIONS ARE REALLY SHIT AT THEIR JOB, THOUGH, AND THEY DON’T GIVE A FUCK ABOUT NEFREKEPTAH. HE WALKS RIGHT THROUGH THEM AND POKES THE IMMORTAL SERPENT GUARDING THE BOX IN THE FACE.

THE SNAKE IS PRETTY FUCKING FURIOUS, AND IT DIVES AT NEFREKEPTAH, WHO JUST FUCKING BEHEADS IT. BEING AN IMMORTAL SNAKE, THOUGH, IT DOESN’T FUCKING DIE. THE HEAD FLIES BACK ONTO THE BODY AND THE SNAKE TRIES AGAIN. ONCE AGAIN, NEFREKEPTAH BEATS THE SHIT OUT OF THE SNAKE, BUT THIS TIME HE THROWS THE HEAD IN THE RIVER. THAT DOESN’T STOP IT FROM REATTACHING, THOUGH, AND HE HAS TO DO IT ALL OVER AGAIN. NEXT TIME, HE POURS A BUCKET OF SAND OVER THE STUMP, AND THE HEAD JUST BOUNCES OFF. HE LEAVES THE SNAKE WRIGGLING AROUND ON THE FLOOR WITH ITS HEAD BOUNCING EVERYWHERE, OPENS THE BOX, GRABS THE MAGIC BOOK, AND FUCKS OFF.

UNFORTUNATELY FOR NEFREKEPTAH, THOTH REALISES THE BOOK’S BEEN STOLEN AND MURDERS HIM, HIS WIFE AND ALL HIS CHILDREN. YOU REALLY SHOULDN’T PISS OFF THE GODS. THEY CAN GET STABBY AS FUCK.

Royals Pt. 9 (Michael)

PART 1| PART 2| PART 3| PART 4 | PART 5| PART 6| PART 7| PART 8 

Originally posted by mcliffordmadness

|| in which you are royalty but Michael is not. || 

MASTERLIST 

// 

“What do you mean pregnant?” 

Your eyes focused on the carpet underneath you. 

Sophie’s eyes widen in realisation. “Y/N, you didn’t.” 

You nodded in shame. 

“No.” 

You nodded again. 

You heard Sophie’s groan of frustration as she throws her head back on the couch.  “Y/N,  I swear you are one of the most reckless individuals I have ever had the..” 

She stopped when she noticed the silent tears that were making  its way down your cheeks. “ Hey, hey, I’m sorry. I’m just really surprised.” 

You shook her head, sitting beside her gently. “It’s not that Sophie, it’s just, you need to help me.” 

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