born on third base

It was once said of W Bush that he was born on third base but thought he hit a triple ...

If so, then it’s fair to say Donald J. Trump was born halfway down the third base line but thought he invented baseball.

Donald, Jr., meanwhile, was born crossing home plate, and while he isn’t sure what game he’s playing, he knows he’s really good at it because everyone is always applauding.

Born on Third Base 

by kiddle (115k)

Published : 2017-06-02

“We have lived very different lives, you and I.“
“And yet, here we both are.”

All his life, Harry figured the recipe for success was to work hard, follow the rules, and have a plan. In school, he always had the top marks in his class. He knew what university he wanted to get into, and he knew what he wanted to study. What was not part of his plan was getting accepted for a scholarship to the most elite private boarding school in the country.
So, deciding that the opportunity best not go to waste, Harry shows up for his first and last year at Rockcrest Academy for Boys. There, he meets his roommate, Louis, who is seemingly popular, rich, rebellious, on the football team, and has a thing for movies from the 80s and 90s. They shouldn’t be friends. They come from two different worlds. But with help from a secret off-campus car, and a determination to break the rules, they hit it off. And somehow along the way, they show each other the parts of life they’re each missing out on.

Chaptered

Deep Space Nine RECAP: 7x04

Perhaps the reason why my Trek through Deep Space Nine was on hold for a while, was because the universe knew that this strawberry milkshake of an episode would be exactly what I needed this week.

Season 7, Episode 4: ‘Take Me Out To the Holosuite’

It’s another beautiful day in space — until Sisko’s mood is upended by the arrival of his Petty Nemesis, one Captain Solok.

A) Love a petty nemesis, fantastic, B) am just realizing in this moment that there is no one in the Quadrant more suited to petty nemisery than Vulcans. Those people never forget a detail. In a ‘Which Line In Hamilton Are You?’ quiz all Vulcans get “Here’s an itemized list of thirty years of disagreements.”

“(Sweet Jesus.)”

Solok and Sisko each affect a superior remove while they snip and preen at each other over their respective medals of honor. Then Solok gives Sisko a rundown of the repairs his ship is going to need, and unfortunately for EVERYONE, it turns out that the work that needs to be done on the T’Kumbra’s warp core will take at least week. Aggrieved siiigh.

As he rises to depart, Solok mentions that while here he needs the use of a holosuite. Well whatever your floats your spaceboat; take it up with Quark.

“I have created a special program for my senior staff,” he continues, “and they are quite eager to resume using it.”

Sisko, in a tone that is somehow more dismissive and disinterested than not even responding: “Really.”

Oh yes really. In fact, it’s based on an Earth game.

We don’t even hear Solok say it, we just cut to Ben bouncing up to Kira like “Colonel, gather the team! I mean crew. I mean TEAM.”

Keep reading

Ann Richards, a former Governor of Texas,

once joked about George H. W. Bush that he was born on third base, but thought he hit a triple. 

Betsy DeVos, meanwhile, was born halfway down the third base line, got a helping hand starting her slide into home … and still got lost on the way.

When one is born rich enough, anything is possible.

Medical revenge on the big man on campus.

Back in the 1990s I was enjoying college life, much the same as any kid. Though I had a great many friends, I wasn’t popular with the ladies at the time, due to my extreme shyness. Even when girls would show interest, I either didn’t pick up on it, or was way too shy to do anything about it.

So the Big Man on Campus (BMoC) lived next to me in our dorm. You know the type - good looking, rich family, born on third base and thinks he hit a triple. This is the kind of guy you saw with a different girl every week. He left of trail of broken hearts on his wake, but it takes two to tango, so whatever.

Now one day, BMoC decided he didn’t like me. I’m guessing mostly because I wasn’t successful with the ladies like himself. I was a quiet neighbor, studious, early to bed type who rarely said a word, so I cant imagine I did anything to gain his ire. Nevertheless he decided to torment me every chance he got for a few weeks - physical aggression, verbal assaults about my lack of manliness, typical immature bullshit.

Anyways, I had enough and went to work with a little revenge scheme. I was visiting the ER of the local hospital with flu symptoms, when a brilliant idea hit me. Sitting in the patient room waiting for a nurse to see me, I noticed a stack of letterhead with the hospital’s information on top. I popped a few of the papers it into my backpack, and after my visit returned to my dorm room… and pc/printer.

I wrote a professional sounding, medical term laced letter to BMoC detailing the fact that a young girl had come into their free clinic who had been diagnosed with syphilis. She had given the name of several of her sexual partners, including BMoC, and they were requesting he come in to get checked out.

I dropped the letter into campus mail on Thursday, which means he would receive it in his box on Friday. Oh, did I mention the clinic he received the letter from was only open Mon-Thur? :) Thus, he would have to wait a few days to contact them and get tested.

BMoC received his letter on Friday (confirmed by co-conspirator friend who worked in the campus post office). Every time I saw him the next few days, he looked like he had seen a ghost. Not really sure of the outcome at the hospital when he showed up with fake letter in hand, but I do know he chilled right the f*ck out the rest of that semester. I imagine having the sh*t scared out of you will do that to a gigolo.

lordviridis  asked:

So what are senator Kallan's political views?

Max is pretty solidly liberal, part of which can certainly be attributed to his time in the military.  Before that, he’d attended a prestigious private school and Yale, and spent his time in pretty rarefied social circles.  While his grandfather and mother are strong proponents of giving employees enough to meet their needs and buy your products (much of which comes from Adrian’s belief that you shouldn’t need “handouts” if you’re working), spending enough time around people who were born on third base can definitely skew how you see things like social programs.

In the military, however, it doesn’t matter what your name is or how much money you have. You’re not getting promoted quicker just because your family is famous (and in fact, Max came in for a fair amount of unwelcome attention during training once his family connections reached his superiors - he left OCS and TBS in the best condition of his life).  Leading a platoon, he saw firsthand how even a military family could be doing everything they’re Supposed To Do and still need assistance with food, or how one major car repair could ruin their budget for the month.  Deploying twice caused him to really take a step back and evaluate the direction the US was taking with foreign affairs, and see how hamfisted handling and no end strategy in sight helped no one but the military contractors getting rich off the deal.

He left the military with a marked disdain for politicians who care about nothing but fattening their own bank accounts, and decided to run for office after his sister pointed out that, “Maybe instead of just standing there bitching about it, Max, you could do something.”

He 100% absolutely believes it’s his job to serve the public, a stance that has made him quite popular in his district but has a tendency to baffle those who are expecting him to be a typical “corporations are people” type, and irk those who think that things are fine and no one needs to upset the apple cart.


(note: I should add that I’m taking some … liberties with the current world situation for this book. I’m already living the dumpster fire that is the Trump presidency; I have no desire to write it, even if it does give my angry little punk less to rage against. Thus, the Democratic candidate won the presidency, Congress is not packed to the rafters with mean old men who hate poor people, and much of the issue is - as it is in real life, seems like - that Democrats can’t seem to get out of their own way to get shit done.  So there are still government issues, but not of the “you’re literally going to die, fuck you” sort.

I’m also taking some liberties with the Marine Corps because frankly it’s stupid that women are only now barely even getting a look in at combat arms MOSs, so that’s going away, too. Of course women deploy. Why wouldn’t they? They’re Marines, aren’t they?)

Not All Me

A few weeks ago, my wife and I went for a walk down on the beach at twilight. It’s something we do every so often, because it’s the best time of day for such a thing, and the uninterrupted activity makes for better discussions. In Long Beach, the ocean is down 15 to 20 feet from the city proper (it’s why the collapse of the Antarctic Ice Sheet is NO BIG DEAL here), so you have to climb stairs to get back to the street once you’re done with your walk. On this particular evening, I emerged at the top of the stairs—chest heaving with breath, because I am still hideously out of shape, despite my current diet and exercise regimen—only to find a woman there, out for a run, waiting for a traffic light to change. She had a rape whistle wrapped around her right hand, and when she sensed my arrival—not hard, given my panting—her fingers tightened around it instinctively. She didn’t even look at me. She just did it.

Keep reading

The “born on third base, think they hit a triple” poster boy. Trump thinks being rude to get attention is good. Privilege has provided every opportunity, but the lasting memory of Trump is of an egocentric, greedy asshole.

First up is Michael Driver; Michael is a Nottingham born, London based Illustrator currently in his third year at Kingston University studying Illustration and Animation. His work is a marriage of sharp lines, bold colours and analogue textures, he says he has “a great passion for print narrative image and mid century design”.

1. If you could only use one tool for making work for the rest of your life, what would it be?

If i was only ever going to be able to use one tool for making work for the rest of my life i’d probably only use a brush theres a nice directness about using a brush and there is always a chance of making happy accidents.

2. What would your dream illustration job or client be?

I would really love to have the opportunity to work with The New Yorker so many people of high prestige have worked with them and it would be lovely to one day have a go at doing the cover.

3. Cheese or Chocolate?

 Chocolate every time! I have the most ridiculous sweet tooth.