boring-i-know

Batfam as Tweets and Tumblr Shitposts™
  • Dick: Knowledge is knowing tomato is a fruit, wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad
  • Steph: That was deep
  • Tim: Philosophy is wondering if that means ketchup is a smoothie
  • Steph: That was deeper
  • Jason: Common sense is knowing that ketchup isn't a damn smoothie YOU NASTY!
  • -------
  • Tim: What if trees cried because we started eating their fruit because their fruit is basically their babies. So every time we eat an apple or something, we're eating a tree baby
  • Damian: *Slowly backs away from the fruit bowl looking stricken*
  • Bruce: *Not looking up from his newspaper* we're eating their ovaries actually
  • --------
  • Jason: That feeling you get when you're angry
  • Dick: Anger
  • --------
  • Steph: Boys are so lucky to have boners to tell them when they're horny because girls are just like damn am I horny or am I hungry or am I bored I don't know I don't have a dick
  • --------
  • Jason: If I cut off my foot and like swing it at your head am I kicking or hitting you?
  • Tim: You'll most likely mentally scar me more than anything else
  • ---------
  • Dick: Carpe diem seize the day. Carpe noctem seize the night. Carpe natem seize the ass.
  • ---------
  • Jason: 80% exhaustion 10% sarcasm 20% don't care
  • Tim: That's 110%
  • Jason: 20% of me doesn't care
  • Tim: Should've seen that coming
  • ----------
  • Bruce: *Mary Poppins voice* okay children time to go
  • [Fifteen minutes later]
  • Bruce: *Batman voice* I said let's go
  • -----------
  • Alfred: Who ate all the cookies?
  • Dick: Ninjas
  • Alfred: I didn't see them
  • Dick: No one ever does
  • -----------
  • Bruce: *Calls up pizza place*
  • Bruce: WHY WOULD YOU CUT MY PIZZA SO UNEVEN? IF YOU ARE TRYING TO TEAR MY FAMILY APART IT'S WORKING
The Most “Moon” Things My Friends Have Ever Said

Thought this would be pretty fun & silly lol

Aries moon: I want to stop playing. Not because I’m losing, but because this game is fucking dumb”.

Taurus moon: I’m just looking to get wine-mom drunk tonight.”

Gemini moon: “Sometimes I stay up really late and enter random chat rooms for fun. They tell me their fetishes and everything…”

Cancer moon: “I feel like I really care about everyone but no one cares about me.”

Leo moon: “I skipped class because they don’t deserve my presence.”

Virgo moon: “Yeah, it’s that modern art shit that’s just a potato chip crumb on a plate. Genius.”

Libra moon: “There’s no hot people at this party, what’s the point?”

Scorpio moon: “Crime shows bore me, I always know who did it within like 5 minutes.”

Sagittarius moon: “I dropped 2 tabs of acid yesterday and became the best artist of all time.”

Capricorn moon: “Fuck you, I could beat Gordon Ramsay in a cook-off any day.”

Aquarius moon: “The state of our country right now…no actually, the state of our WORLD right now terrifies me.”

Pisces moon: “I don’t care that it’s just a game, you can’t leave those dogs in such small cages like that!”

-Admin L

8

“Because I know how important they are for so many people and just making sure that there’s this really nice balance of things you guys haven’t seen before. I don’t know, I’m always like, “they’re gonna get bored with this” but I know you’re probably not. But I put a lot of pressure on myself to keep getting those scenes right.“ (x)

Sun signs according to people I’ve met

Aries

Usually very motivated and energetic, they have a really strong aura around them. I admire them a lot, they seem like cool people and may seem intimidating but are super nice in person! Protective of their loved ones. Goals in terms of swag and athleticism they got. Teach me how to carry myself like you please.


Taurus

The cutest, most amazing (even if a bit stubborn) friends. Best partners for getting food or watching a movie together. Taurus boys are my cryptonite, Taurus girls are the loves of my life. They are very much real in a sense of being human. Sensual, chill and true, really “earthy”. Fake isn’t in their vocabulary. Seriously I know quite a few Tauruses and I love them all to death. Only problem is when we disagree on something major, neither will back down from the argument.


Gemini

I always lowkey hate on them, but they aren’t all that bad; Conversations with them are the most fun, and when I am with them I never get bored; I know a lot of male Gemini’s and no female ones sadly; in general they are nice people but usually fuckboys. Probably wouldn’t date one (but flirting with them is a lot of fun). Good sense of humour.


Cancer

Being a Cancer myself I tend to be drawn to a specific type of Cancer females on social media. Those are the The Moms, their entire vibe is really soft and warm and motherly but also protective and strong. We will cook you dinner because we love you. We are good cooks in general. Foul mouths and will fight you any time. Pretend to be edgy, but we usually aren’t. Crying over our partner (or lack of) all the damn time but usually in private.


Leo

Ughh. Leo females are okay but Leo males? They annoy me to no end and I always bicker with them, but at the same time they are usually really charming so :/. Lowkey hate them and their inflated ego but they are good friends which I appreciate. Loud and sooo in your face but loyal and can take you to the most bizarre and amazing places. Overall infuriating 0/10 do not recommend. (Jk)


Virgo

Okay, so I am biased, but Virgos are literally perfect human beings. They are smart, logical, neat and polished and just ugh. Especially females are really classic beauties with killer fashion sense. Overall all genders seem to have a feminine vibe? It’s sooo hard to get them even remotely interested in you but it’s worth it in the end. Can push you to be the best version of yourself. They can literally step on me. Heart eyes motherfucker.


Libra

Oookay, so. Libras are weird, man. It’s hard to dislike them, because they can be so nice but you never know if they are real nice or fake nice. Seems like usually fake tho. They are super gorgeous, in a very luxurious way and their lives are the true aesthetics. First impression is that they are pretty shallow, but I wouldn’t assume that about people without knowing them.


Scorpio

Damn I love Scorpios! Deep af, people I can talk to about my deepest thoughts, discussing occult stuff, cry on their shoulders or just hug it all out m8. I feel super comfortable with them. Best partners for planning an assassination on your ex (or Trump) tbh. Aesthetics on point as well. I am living for that mysterious grunge shit vibe. You go my bros.


Sagittarius

Don’t hate me for this, but the only sign I usually cannot stand to keep close are Sags. They are amazing conversationalists with the sharpest minds out there and interesting points of view. Talking to them about basically any topic can take hours and not get boring, and you could take them for an adventure for a week and it would be the best choice. But longterm relationship or friendship? Nah. I do not trust.


Capricorn

I have a lot of Capricorn women in my life and I admire them so much. They are so hardworking, punctual and they sacrifice themselves for their loved ones everyday, in every way. Also their love is so good and true, damn. The Cap stereotype is that they are bad with feelings but I strongly disagree. One of the most amazing signs out there. Protect them and treasure them.


Aquarius

Aw my favourite aliens. Just kidding. They are often misunderstood I think, but they are actually super cool. They are not afraid of being different and that’s a really admirable trait imo. Also the best partners for sharing your conspiracy theories with. If you feel like they just walked all over you, they probably didn’t mean it, they just don’t realize it sometimes? The most interesting people to keep around, if you can tolerate their cold exterior.


Pisces

Damn you Pisces. Why you all gotta be so unpredictable. I know a great deal of Pisces people and each of them is so different, it is simply impossible to categorize them in any way lol. My brother is a confident social butterfly. One of my friends is an aesthetics grunge queen with a lot of sadness inside. My other friend is pretty shy and introverted with a lot of super weird quirks (probably the only one fitting the usual Pisces category). Another one is a typical nerd who is however pretty choleric and fake on the inside. And another one was the spawn of satan and literally the ugliest and most selfish person I know. What even are Pisces lmao.

anonymous asked:

What does your perfect world look like?

A bit of the Trossachs, Snowdonia and Newfoundland thrown together, my dogs, my sisters and their kids, Happy Queers, an endless library, no factories, no autos, no noise, maybe a train, proper accommodations everywhere for those with every sort of disability or impairment, a small sporting area for light sabre battles and biannual cosplay events (with holodecks available), a faithful reproduction of Rivendell but with Amazons, a science and aeronautics ‘village’ with dedicated geniuses designing intergalactic transport for when it is Time to Leave This Place and Benes chip shop.  

All Needed Things are supplied via advanced Replicators. 

There are constant rumours of Tardis sightings.

Every year we host the Hayfever Fan Fiction Festival.  

We haven’t a flag, but we all hang out our laundry, so.

Ye Olde Relickru Shoppe (YORS) features a selection of fine wines, whiskies and sexual ‘aides.’   There are weekly discussions on the merits of pineapple on pizza vs Just About Anything Else.

Buckfast is illegal, but someone at YORS ‘knows a guy.’ 

Since we live in an alternate reality, we enjoy different telly:

  • Xena is now in her 21st season
  • Clarke and Lexa are leading the Coalition into a new, peaceful era - and Raven’s managed to setup wifi for everyone
  • The Doctor has always been a woman. Except that One Time  
  • The Hermione Granger films are still very popular
  • The L-Word is a chat show dedicated to all things Lexa
  • There is a 24-hour w/w channel featuring productions of @Steklir’s More Women Than Warriors, @entirelytookeen’s The White Queen Running, @femininenachos‘ Don’t Want to Be Your Girl and so much more.  Sundays are dedicated entirely to short films based upon @coeurdastronaute‘s prompts and @unicyclehippo‘s various head cannons. 

Quidditch Wednesdays are on hold until we sort out the Recent Deaths

Do not speak to the Empty Woman in the Fountain.  She will correct your grammar and insult your choice of clothing

If you see a Clockwork run down, please wind it up. It’s rude to just leave it there 

If you fail to wind a Clockwork and it comes after you later, that is Your Own Fault and We Will Not Pity You

The phone boxes are entrances to parallel universes, so only use when Necessary

There is a Monster in our loch, everyone has seen it and it doesn’t mind the odd selfie - it does love chatting with terfs. We never hear from them again for some reason (hence our country is free of terfs) 

If you have a fidget spinner, You Must Share It 

We’ve no leader, but the Oracle sometimes dispenses advice which she advises not to heed 

We’re mostly atheists and agnostics, but there is a church somewhere near the standing stones and everyone is free to participate, whenever it appears (usually on a full moon) 

Signs According To People I’ve Met

Aries

Usually very motivated and energetic, they have a really strong aura around them. I admire them a lot, they seem like cool people and may seem intimidating but are super nice in person! Protective of their loved ones. Goals in terms of swag and athleticism they got. Teach me how to carry myself like you please.

Taurus

The cutest, most amazing (even if a bit stubborn) friends. Best partners for getting food or watching a movie together. Taurus boys are my cryptonite, Taurus girls are the loves of my life. They are very much real in a sense of being human. Sensual, chill and true, really “earthy”. Fake isn’t in their vocabulary. Seriously I know quite a few Tauruses and I love them all to death. Only problem is when we disagree on something major, neither will back down from the argument.

Keep reading

Hello sweeties! When I went through the IB programme, sometimes I felt so overwhelmed by all the reading, work, presentations and everything we had to do. So here are my tips to help you manage your time wisely ♥

Write things down:
It can be an agenda, a board, a calendar, post it notes. ANYTHING where you write down all the things you have to do. I always recommend planners and calendars because you can check the overview of a months and keep track of dates.

Make a to-do list:
This one is just for the day. If you get overwhelmed sometimes (like me) about all the things you have to do, this will help. Youc an start with an easy task to get your momentum going, or with a difficult one to get it over with. You have to find what works for you and know your priorities.

Set aside leisure time:
You NEED relax time. you know that right? there’s nothing else worse than a burnout so set alarms every 30min or so and go do your favorite activity for a little while. 

Know yourself:
What I mean by this is work at the time that you feel best at. Work in a place that you feel comfortable in. If it’s 10pm and you’re tired, don’t go to your bed and lie down to read your boring theory book.

Don’t procrastinate:
Seriously. I know this too well. Especially if you’re a perfectionist, all you’re going to do whine and cry about the work that needs to be done, but that doesn’t help. Break down your tasks and start little by little!

Keep your materials with you:
This is something that has worked for me bc some people tend to be late or class doesn’t start at the time or I’m waiting for an appointment, so if I’m bored or have a little spare time, I can read a book or handout because I have it with me!

I wrote each one of these personally, so please don’t repost. I hope this helps you, and remember to use your time wisely! If you have any questions, don’t hesitate on messaging me ^_^ © freepic icon

Love, Yumi ⏰

Questions for gif-makers.

  1. What are your top 3 favorite sets you’ve made
  2. What is your least favorite set you’ve made
  3. Which of your sets has the most notes
  4. A set that flopped but deserved better
  5. What is your favorite movie/TV show to gif
  6. What is your least favorite movie/TV show to gif
  7. Who are your top 3 gif makers
  8. What gif trend do you hate
  9. What/who inspired you to start making gifs
  10. What was the first gif you ever posted
  11. What is that one set you made that just won’t die
  12. What is the most embarrassing thing you’ve ever giffed
  13. Where or from whom did you learn how to gif
  14. How long does it usually take you to make a set
  15. Have you ever had gifs stolen and reposted
  16. How long have you been making gifs
  17. 10 sets, 8 sets, 6 sets? How many gifs to you prefer in a set
  18. For the aesthetic, for the laughs, or for the feels what your preference
  19. What is your gifting process like
  20. Mac or PC
  21. PSDs or original coloring for each gif
  22. What fandom/movie/show/person etc do you gif the most
  23. What is the thing you gif when you don’t have anything else you want to gif
  24. 480p 720p 1080p? What is the minimum quality you’ll gif from 
  25. Old dimensions or new dimensions and why
  26. How many un posted sets are in your drafts right now
  27. Have you ever made a set, decided you hated it and deleted it? What was it
  28. Have you ever posted a set, regretted it and immediately deleted it
  29. Have you ever posted a set, realized you made a mistake later but it was already too late
  30. How frequently do you like to post
  31. Do you schedule/queue posts or do you post right after you’re done
  32. What is your favorite tool/adjustment layer in Photoshop
  33. Do you like to/can you make edits and graphics too or only gifs
  34. A set that took you a long time/was really hard but you’re really proud of how it came out
  35. Do you change your giffing style a lot or do you have a set routine
  36. Do you gif with something specific in mind or do you just wing it
  37. What sets if any do you have planned to make in the future
  38. What are you really excited to gif that isn’t out yet
  39. How often, if ever, do you delete old sets that you don’t like anymore
  40. Why do you make gifs
  41. What is your least favorite part about your gif making process
  42. How is your gif folder organized? Is it organized at all?
  43. Do you keep videos forever or delete them once you’re done giffing
  44. Ever had a gif become a meme? Would you like that if you haven't 
  45. Ever gotten hate over a set
  46. Ever gotten a really sweet compliment over a set
  47. Any advice for novice gif makers/people who want to start making gifs
  48. How would you describe your giffing style
  49. How much would you say you’ve improved since you first started giffing

I know you want to be thin.
I know the cork board of your thoughts is tacked full of nothing but numbers and magazine girls.
I know you are at a point of calling this dedication.

I know that assessing the circumference of your wrist with opposite hand is a calculation you aren’t even aware of making half the time.
I know you have a million conversions and equations and numerical values all memorized in your head.
I know you’ve never hated anything more than you hate math.

I know you spend your days sipping on coffee, always black, in pathetic attempt to feel something comparable to fueled.
I know you are always either sweating or shivering,
You are always moving, always burning
And malnourishment means you are the only one in this room who feels cold.

I know you see the galaxy every time you stand up.
I know you think it’s romantic to see the stars through dark clouds,
But really, it’s not.
The cosmos is still far away as ever.
This is just you
Failing your body.

I know you are unhappy.
I know that existing in this state is not as exciting as all the poetry and lifetime movies would have you believe.
I know the boring.
I know the sitting in a chair for hours on end adding up calorie contents.
Repeatedly.
I know the repetition, the monotony,
The drab days and days of ritualistic movements
Checking and rechecking.
I know this all feels so empty and
What else would you expect?
You have not allowed yourself to feel full
In so very long.

When you look back at this time in your life, you will not see any sort of grand epic, no chaos
All you will see on this timeline is
White space.
Blankness.
Life put on hold for these months, these years spent sick.

I know that despite your discontent, you still feel starvation is a necessity.
I know that taking care of yourself hurts anymore.

I know you drool over pictures of rib cages
Forgetting that there is a heart underneath
And that it is beating far too slowly.

I know you dream of being small the way you should be dreaming of your future,
But don’t you know, that pretty body will kill you,
That once you do achieve that perfectly flat stomach, your health will have already been long destroyed,
That your heart may stop altogether right around the time your hip bones really begin to look defined.

I know you will find yourself crying wondering where everything went wrong.
You will curse yourself for becoming this way.
You will feel jealous of every person’s rut that isn’t deadly
And every person’s body that is somehow both thin and healthy.
It will hit you that your body could never be thin AND healthy and you’re going to be very angry,
Both at your body and at the world
For having you believe that the women on tv were the epitome of health,
That your health could never look like that.

You’re going to feel stupid because of how many of the Anorexic Bimbo jokes that apply to you now,
You will be having a panic attack thinking about the possible ingredients in a restaurant’s bread rolls and it will hit you as the stupidest thing to be so damn worried about.
Still, you will not be able to turn the fear off so easily.

You will feel out of control realizing how you only feel in control when you’re losing weight.
You’ll wonder why the hell weight loss is so admired as the strongest thing a person can do because you feel nothing but weak, weak, weak.
You will feel stuck.

You will try to eat normally again.
You will probably fuck up.
You will wonder where all that so-called willpower is now that it’s health you’re aiming for over sickness.
You’ll realize it was never the amount of willpower you possessed that made the pounds fall right off,
But the amount of self hatred.

You will eat and your thoughts will scream at you so loud you stop again.
You will have a constant fear of not ever being able to get past this.
You’ll hear about people who have dealt with your disorder for decades and you’ll wonder how they’re not dead yet and ponder on whether surviving this for twenty years would be better or worse than having it kill you after three.

You will be sure of absolutely nothing when everything solid comes tumbling down.
Your first instinct will be to stand everything back up
Nice and tidy
When really it should be to find some new solidity altogether.
After all, these fallen walls are the same ones that landed you here at all
And I know you just want to be as far away from this place as possible.

Roman Godfrey X Shy!Reader

Anonymous said:

Love your work! Could you maybe find the time to do a short headcannon of Roman with an unusually shy girl? Thanks, love!

A/N : Thank you, darling! I hope you enjoy this!

Originally posted by adoresfandoms

  • When Roman first sees you, he knew he had to get your attention.
  • But, for the first time ever, he had no idea how to do that.
  • He didn’t know that you would glance at him out of the corner of your eyes.
  • He couldn’t see that anything he did would catch your attention.
  • You barely spoke in English class, only making you more intriguing to Roman.
  • “Find a partner and discuss the last five chapters.”
  • Roman immediately walked over to you, planting himself in the desk next to yours.
  • “Hi,” he said, that charming smile glued on his face.
  • You just nodded at him, too scared to utter a word.
  • “I haven’t read a single chapter so I have no idea what she’s talking about. With the tones or whatever,” Roman admitted, hoping he could coax you into talking.
  • You only pressed your lips together and flipped through your book.
  • “Are you okay?” He placed his hand on yours gently.
  • Roman Godfrey was touching you.
  • You looked up and met his eyes.
  • A calming blueish-green.
  • “I’m f-fine,” you squeaked out.
  • Roman smiled, your voice being the softest thing had ever heard.
  • Since then, you and Roman would partner up in English class.
  • You were still the quietest person he had ever met, but you were starting to speak up more.
  • In the hallways, he would wink at you and grin when you blushed.
  • Your eyes would find the floor as the people around the two of you would stare in confusion.
  • Why did the most popular, rich boy in school want you, the girl that barely said a word.
  • Sometimes, on the day’s you were more talkative, he’d throw an arm around you shoulders.
  • “Roman, people are staring.”
  • “Let them, you’re beautiful.”
  • “They’re staring at you,” you said sadly, trying to hide your blush.
  • “No,” Roman said with a smile, “I’m nothing compared to you.”
  • You quickly learned that, due to your immense shiness, Roman made it his life’s goal to make you blush.
  • The two of you were in this type of limbo when it came to your relationship.
  • Roman was very forward with his affections.
  • You tried to be but your timid nature would take over.
  • One day, when you were feeling very brave out of the blue, you grabbed in his hand.
  • Roman didn’t say a word when your finger’s entangled with his own, he only smiled.
  • The next day, in English class, Roman dared to take it a step further.
  • “I say we go out for coffee after school and not read this boring-ass book.”
  • “I don’t know Roman,” you said quietly, not meeting his eyes.
  • “I know,” Roman said with a grin.
  • He pulled the book from your hands and you reluctantly met his gaze.
  • You knew as soon as you met his eyes, you’d give in.
  • “Alright,” you said, feeling a heat rush to your cheeks as Roman licked his lips.
  • The coffee date went smoothly for the most part.
  • The caffeine in your system made you really open.
  • “Do you drink coffee often?”
  • “No, not with that much sugar! This is fun!!”
  • “This is the loudest I’ve ever heard you.”
  • He walked you home as you both chatted about school.
  • “I’ve never really had a friend like you, Roman.” You admitted.
  • “Huh?”
  • “I’ve always been really shy,” you said, stressing the ‘really’.
  • “That doesn’t mean you can’t have friends, I’m your friend.” Although he wanted to be more.
  • His arm tightened around your waist, pulling you closer to his side.
  • “I just never made any,” you said sadly, leaning into his warmth.
  • “Well you have me,” Roman said, looking down at you.
  • For what was the first time maybe, your eyes were already on his and holding his gaze.
  • You both stopped walking, staring at eachother.
  • Soon his arm snaked away from your waist and his hands went to you cheeks.
  • His lips were on yours, softly at first, as if scared he’d break you.
  • He didn’t want to push you too far and have you crawl back into your shell.
  • Roman had waited too long for this moment to have you leave.
  • After a moment, you pulled away from his lips.
  • Your face was beet red, making Roman grin.
  • “Thank God for coffee,” he said, before pressing his lips to yours again.
  • Since that first date, Romna had hardly left your side.
  • Whenever someone gave you a look in the hallway, he’d glare at them.
  • Through your relationship with him, you grew a little more confident each day.
  • You now had friends: Peter, Letha, and Shelley.
  • They all ship you and Roman.
  • “They’re perfect for each other. Roman is no-nonsense and impulsive while Y/N is shy and tries to keep him reined in.” Letha would claim, making Shelley nod in agreement.
  • Peter and Roman being your defense squad and Shelley’s too.
  • If anyone mocks you for being shy, Roman will have them bloodied in an instant.
  • “Don’t talk about my girlfriend that way. Next time, you won’t be able to walk away.”
  • Hugs all the time, so you’re blushing all the time.
  • You’re timid when it comes to PDA but Roman is all for it.
  • He leaved kissing for private time, however.
  • He knows how much you love to kiss him but he also knows that doing so in public is too much for you at times.
  • You both even each other out in the perfect way.
  • “I love you, Y/N.”