boredom time

how the FUCK does one study for an exam without dying of boredom… every time I try to actually sit down and study i start being so sleepy i can barely keep myself from falling from my chair

PUT A # IN MY ASK

Put A Number In My Ask!
ASK ME
1. Who was the last person you held hands with?

2. Are you outgoing or shy?

3. Who are you looking forward to seeing?

4. Are you easy to get along with?

5. If you were drunk would the person you like take care of you?

6. What kind of people are you attracted to?

7. Do you think you’ll be in a relationship two months from now?

8. Who from the opposite gender is on your mind?

9. Does talking about sex make you uncomfortable?

10. Who was the last person you had a deep conversation with?

11. What does the most recent text that you sent say?

12. What are your 5 favorite songs right now?

13. Do you like it when people play with your hair?

14. Do you believe in luck and miracles?

15. What good thing happened this summer?

16. Would you kiss the last person you kissed again?

17. Do you think there is life on other planets?

18. Do you still talk to your first crush?

19. Do you like bubble baths?

20. Do you like your neighbors?

21. What are you bad habits?

22. Where would you like to travel?

23. Do you have trust issues?

24. Favorite part of your daily routine?

25. What part of your body are you most uncomfortable with?

26. What do you do when you wake up?

27. Do you wish your skin was lighter or darker?

28. Who are you most comfortable around?

29. Have any of your ex’s told you they regret breaking up?

30. Do you ever want to get married?

31. Is your hair long enough for a pony tail?

32. Which celebrities would you have a threesome with?

33. Spell your name with your chin.

34. Do you play sports? What sports?

35. Would you rather live without TV or music?

36. Have you ever liked someone and never told them?

37. What do you say during awkward silences?

38. Describe your dream girl/guy?

39. What are your favorite stores to shop in?

40. What do you want to do after high school?

41. Do you believe everyone deserves a second chance?

42. If your being extremely quiet what does it mean?

43. Do you smile at strangers?

44. Trip to outer space or bottom of the ocean?

45. What makes you get out of bed in the morning?

46. What are you paranoid about?

47. Have you ever been high?

48. Have you ever been drunk?

49. Have you done anything recently that you hope nobody finds out about?

50. What was the colour of the last hoodie you wore?

51. Ever wished you were someone else?

52. One thing you wish you could change about yourself?

53. Favourite makeup brand?

54. Favourite store?

55. Favourite blog?

56. Favourite colour?

57. Favourite food?

58. Last thing you ate?

59. First thing you ate this morning?

60. Ever won a competition? For what?

61. Been suspended/expelled? For what?

62. Been arrested? For what?

63. Ever been in love?

64. Tell us the story of your first kiss?

65. Are you hungry right now?

66. Do you like your tumblr friends more than your real friends?

67. Facebook or Twitter?

68. Twitter or Tumblr?

69. Are you watching tv right now?

70. Names of your bestfriends?

71. Craving something? What?

72. What colour are your towels?

72. How many pillows do you sleep with?

73. Do you sleep with stuffed animals?

74. How many stuffed animals do you think you have?

75. Favourite animal?

76. What colour is your underwear?

77. Chocolate or Vanilla?

78. Favourite ice cream flavour?

79. What colour shirt are you wearing?

80. What colour pants?

81. Favourite tv show?

82. Favourite movie?

83. Mean Girls or Mean Girls 2?

84. Mean Girls or 21 Jump Street?

85. Favourite character from Mean Girls?

86. Favourite character from Finding Nemo?

87. First person you talked to today?

88. Last person you talked to today?

89. Name a person you hate?

90. Name a person you love?

91. Is there anyone you want to punch in the face right now?

92. In a fight with someone?

93. How many sweatpants do you have?

94. How many sweaters/hoodies do you have?

95. Last movie you watched?

96. Favourite actress?

97. Favourite actor?

98. Do you tan a lot?

99. Have any pets?

100. How are you feeling?

101. Do you type fast?

102. Do you regret anything from your past?

103. Can you spell well?

104. Do you miss anyone from your past?

105. Ever been to a bonfire party?

106. Ever broken someone’s heart?

107. Have you ever been on a horse?

108. What should you be doing?

109. Is something irritating you right now?

110. Have you ever liked someone so much it hurt?

111. Do you have trust issues?

112. Who was the last person you cried in front of?

113. What was your childhood nickname?

114. Have you ever been out of your province/state?

115. Do you play the Wii?

116. Are you listening to music right now?

117. Do you like chicken noodle soup?

118. Do you like Chinese food?

119. Favourite book?

120. Are you afraid of the dark?

121. Are you mean?

122. Is cheating ever okay?

123. Can you keep white shoes clean?

124. Do you believe in love at first sight?

125. Do you believe in true love?

126. Are you currently bored?

127. What makes you happy?

128. Would you change your name?

129. What your zodiac sign?

130. Do you like subway?

131. Your bestfriend of the opposite sex likes you, what do you do?

132. Who’s the last person you had a deep conversation with?

133. Favourite lyrics right now?

134. Can you count to one million?

135. Dumbest lie you ever told?

136. Do you sleep with your doors open or closed?

137. How tall are you?

138. Curly or Straight hair?

139. Brunette or Blonde?

140. Summer or Winter?

141. Night or Day?

142. Favourite month?

143. Are you a vegetarian?

144. Dark, milk or white chocolate?

145. Tea or Coffee?

146. Was today a good day?

147. Mars or Snickers?

148. What’s your favourite quote?

149. Do you believe in ghosts?

150. Get the closest book next to you, open it to page 42, what’s the first line on that page?

(Technically it’s the 15th since it’s 1:38am)

So there’s one bit near the end of the Genocide Run that hit me pretty hard, personally. And as with most things that hit me very hard emotionally, it was a random almost throwaway line that wasn’t written to be focused on that much. But whether it intentionally held the meaning I took from it or not, it doesn’t change the fact that I DID take meaning from it.

When Flowey is monologuing near the very very end of the game and explaining what he went through, he talks about how he lacks the ability to feel anything for the people around him, and how desperately, frantically, he wishes he did. He talks about how, at first, he tried to help people. He talks about how at first it seemed to help, but every time it was time to let go, to move on, he got scared and couldn’t do it. He’d panic and reset instead. And how then he’d be right back where he started. And he would try helping everyone again.

But it became hollow. Everyone always said the exact same things, and did the exact same things. And nothing changed. And nothing new ever happened.

And eventually, just out of sheer desperation for SOMETHING new, he decided to kill everyone. And how that was at first a relief, but even that grew stale and empty as he did it over and over again. Until he was left with nothing, and there was nothing to care about, either for better or worse, but he couldn’t let go either. So he was trapped in this world where nothing ever changed, and he couldn’t make himself leave.

It’s a sad story, but it’s also a bit of a gut punch because of its implications.

Maybe in time, the person playing the game, the actual human being behind the keyboard, not the pixel character they control, would find themselves in the exact same situation. Eventually, things in a game stop changing. Characters always say the same things, do the same things. And maybe in time, as boredom takes over, the player would also try a genocide game just for SOMETHING new. But eventually even that will become empty and lead to nowhere after you do it enough.

I can’t really say if that’s true or not. I can’t say it’s false either.

But It’s 2 years now. And a lot of us are still here. And more importantly a lot of us still care. Quite deeply in fact.

And maybe we won’t care forever, maybe the same thing will happen, or more likely, we’d be the ones able to let go and move on to other things and let go. Maybe there’s no escaping that.

But it’s been 2 years, and at least for now, we’re still here.

There is also the possibility I’ve considered, that since the insane success of the game was never expected or anticipated at all, that the level of love it caused in gamers was a complete and utter surprise, maybe their ability to never fall into that cycle of apathy and just how long they can keep going, caring as hard as ever, will also be a complete surprise that was never foreseen.

Or even more simply, maybe Flowey just needed to be shown, as with so many things, he was wrong about that too.

Who knows. Honestly I can’t say how things will look in time. It could either way.


But at least by year 2 we were still here.

I Will Survive....parody

“I Can’t Survive” (Hannigram Ver.)

Hannibal:
At first I was afraid, I was petrified,
Kept thinking I could live without Will Graham by my side
Oh I had spent so many nights thinking how I was so wrong,
The feelings ain’t gone. He’s still the man that I want

Will:
And now I’m back. A familiar face.
I need my murder husband here and oh I’m on a chase
The murder husbands you can’t stop
We were always meant to be
Now I’m sailing across the ocean,on my way to Italy.

Hannibal & Will:
Go on now, go. It’s worth fightin’ for
It doesn’t matter now.Without him life is such a bore
And although he might have hurt me several times.
I always loved the trouble.
Laying my life out on the line

Oh, no, not I!
I can’t survive.
Because I dream about him everyday and every single night
There is no alternative
All I need is to forgive.
And I can’t survive,
I can’t survive, hey, hey.

Hannibal:
I knew there was something lurking from very start
Can’t say I didn’t find it cute to see him fall apart
Oh I sat back,kinda wanted to watch your brain slowly melt
Oh I didn’t try…but hey,you didn’t die.

Will:
You know it hurt me to see you with Bloom.
Oh the jealously only worsened.I’m still in love with you.
I wanted to see your reckoning
A little sniffly,teary plea
Tried to kill you,indirectly,cause you chose her over me.

[2x]
Hannibal & Will:
Go on now, go. It’s worth fightin’ for
It doesn’t matter now.Without him life is such a bore
And although he might have hurt me several times.
I always loved the trouble.
Laying my life out on the line

Oh, no, not I!
I can’t survive.
Because I dream about him everyday and every single night
There is no alternative
All I need is to forgive.
And I can’t survive,
I can’t survive, hey, hey.

#NoFearFriday

8 Things That Will Happen If You Don’t Follow Your Dreams

1. Negativity - misery loves company. When we give up on our dreams we will attract others of a similar nature because our vibe attracts our tribe. Having nothing to strive for, nothing to hope to achieve and nothing to work towards will cause us to seek out dysfunctional behaviours to occupy our time.

2. Boredom - the devil makes work for idle hands. Not following our dreams leaves a lot of our time unoccupied and this allows us to fill it with overthinking, watching television and other activities that revolve around living outside of the now such as gossiping.

3. Lack of fulfilment - trying to fill the void. Being unfulfilled is the reason why many of us seek out material things, sex, drugs and relationships - because we believe this will get rid of the feeling that something is missing from our lives. The only way we can be truly fulfilled is by doing what we love & being 100% authentic about it.

4. Envy - projecting our insecurities. Seeing others live their lives and achieve their goals can inspire feelings of envy if we are just sitting on the sidelines watching other people play their super bowl games. Spectators will never know what true glory feels like.

5. Complacency - living in the comfort zone. When we abandon our dreams we confine ourselves to living in a comfort zone for the rest of our lives - these are “fine” but nothing exciting ever happens here and there is very little room for growth. Living our lives in a comfort zone will lead to resentment which can be projected onto those around us.

6. Missing out on life - sitting on the sidelines. Refining ourselves to the sidelines of life and watching everyone else play the championship game is the way we miss out on everything this life has to offer. 

7. Denial - making excuses. Often times those who have given up on their dreams do so before even trying by making excuses like “oh, they only did it because they’re rich”. This how we lie to ourselves to keep ourselves in our comfort zones so that we don’t have to risk failure. How do we know we won’t be great if we don’t try?

8. Complaining - the worst thing we can do. Giving up on our dreams leaves us with a lot of time on our hands, this time tends to get wasted on activities that don’t serve us such as complaining. If we have the time to complain we have the time to change our situation.

You’ve got one life - make your dreams come true.

Peace & positive vibes.