bored but in a good way

anonymous asked:

Jay-Chan! You're back! You had little old Pupper here worried sick! Phew, now that I can talk to you again, I have an AU idea for you. It's a high school sports au. BUT! Jason's the so called nerd who can knock your teeth out, and Tim is the captain of the school's ie hockey team and king of he school. Somehow they end up getting paired for a project and end up seeing something they're not meant to. Can these two idiots survive until senior prom?!?

Pupperrr!!! Welcome back :D I have… no idea what happened but my blog settings were wonky so I think that was probably the issue!

You know the fastest way to my heart is through a good AU (and anything with hockey hello! yes I will take 5!)

I always love thinking about Jay as the thespian nerdy birb (with a mean right hook if you rub him the wrong way), and Tim as the popular but bored athletic kid. 

What could they possibly have seen?! A drug deal? An illicit affair between teachers? A dead body?!

I don’t think there’s anything they couldn’t handle together : D

And now im pondering HS JayTims…

Keep reading

2

a soft and beautiful man and the sharp asshole that lives in his house

Master Post for Beginner Witches

Remember that you don’t have to do anything you aren’t comfortable with, and this list isn’t a requirement for witchcraft, just suggestions. Don’t let ANYONE invalidate you as a witch. Whether you have been doing this for 5 mins or 50 years, you are still a witch. Special love, energy, and snaps sent to all the people responsible for these amazing posts: ♥

Basic Information/Anthology etc.

Good things to research when you don’t know where to research (START HERE)

Types of Witches & Witchcraft

The Boring but IMPORTANT Basics of Witchcraft

Beginner Witchcraft

Crystals to Have on Your Altar (Altars aren’t required but if you do use one, this may be helpful)

Familiars (The Who What Hows)

The Goddess and the God (If following a Wicca Path, and just remember you need to find the path just for you. No one else can tell you how/who to worship)


Spell/Ritual Work

Ways to Cleanse

Magick of the Moon Phases (Familiarize yourself with this, many witches use the phases of the moon for spells, rituals, etc)

Spirit Work for beginners 

Crystal Cleansing (Important if you are going to work with crystals)

Salt & Witchcraft (You know witches love their salt)

Spell Writing Tips for Beginners

Divination Tips for Beginners

Spell Loopholes (A Must Read)

Reading a Candle

Color Magick (Lots of great ideas on how to include color witchcraft in your daily routine)

Simple beginner Spells 

50 simple Charms


Stock Up & Set Up! (Materials, meanings, etc.)

Basic Herbs List

Magical Correspondence and foods

Cleansing and Charging Items

Some Crystals for Beginners

Crystals/Stones Grouped by Use

Witchcraft Basics plants

The types and what I think of them based on what I've seen from my friends

(Not very original I know but I need to do something during this boring af evening)

ENFP
- cute
- childish
- full of ideas
- optimistic
- RaNdOm
-PUNS AND MEMES
- kinda geeky
-have a lot of feelings
- secretly evil

ENTJ
- ‘I wanna be the very best like no one ever waaaaas’
-natural leader
-considerate
- SO. DAMN. LUCKY
- easy going

INTP
-lazy
-smart
- can actually be very talkative if they like the subject
- PrOcRaStInAtIoN
- very funny in their own way
-trapped in their own world

ENTP
-have been told at least once in their life 'you remind me of Barney Stinson’
-have 2000000+ projects at the same time
-actually finish like two of them
-never shut up
-can be good at everything
-but can only be excellent at bullshiting their way through life
-zero empathie
-dad jokes
-socially akward but still manages to look cool

ISTP
-take grammar way too seriously
-frank and direct
-meticulous
-witty
-look intimidating
-can actually be very affectionate if they feel like it
-strong mentally and physically
-know martial arts


ISFJ
-warm and nice
-so calm, it’s relaxing to be around them
-excellent listenners
-shaped like a friend
-have louder reactions than everyone else during movies or roller coaster rides
-don’t dislike a lot of things
-litteraly everyone like them
-easy to live with

ISFP
-FEEEEELIIIIINGS
-don’t like to be challenged
-have strong valors
-don’t understand if you don’t share said valors
-don’t overcome difficulties easily
-EXTREMELY SENSITIVE
-hate criticism, even constructive ones
-too easily offended
-moody
-trustworthy (when they like you)

INTJ
-seem cold and calculating
-make the best of friends if you take the time to know them
-snarky
-quiet
-if they don’t like you you’re dead
-have low patience
-analytical
-don’t handle feelings at all

INFJ
-MYSTERIOUS
-they know everything about you
-but you know nothing about them
-sarcasm
-take time to feel confortable around new people (like 2 years or so)
-long period of awkward silence
-(the silence is awkward for you, no them)
- people tend to like them but still think they’re 'weird’
-secretly a nerd

ESTP
-stereotype of the popular jock
-athletic af
-class clown
-perfectionists
-everyone love them
-always quoting lines from their favorite movies
-want to experience everything
-often come to class with a broken leg or something
-have the kind of humor that everyone like except NTs

ESFP
-'girl’ ESTP
-love to party
-will do stupid stuff just cause they felt like it
-will cry about said stupid things
-GOSSIP
-very loving persons
-their spiritual goddess might be Aphrodite
-loud
-funny

ESFJ
-overprotecting grandma
-will bake you cookies but will be highly offended if you’re not hungry for now
-generous, but will expect you to return the favor
-don’t like when people don’t agree with them
-don’t like to be out of their comfort zone
-can be bossy
-talkative

INFP
-full of crazy, great ideas
-bad at maths
-love to read
-RaVeNcLaW
-extremely moody
-open minded
-like to learn new stuff
-LOTS OF STRESS
-good at acting without even trying

ISTJ
-Like to follow the rules
-but is not afraid to bend them if they logically think they’re stupid
-bossy
-good student
-patient
-will glady help their classmates if they haven’t understood the lesson
-have difficulties to think out of the box
-book smart
-organized

And I don’t know any ENFJ or ESTJ. (I mostly have NTs and INFPs friends.)

Also sorry if the ISFP is a bit harsh but the ones I know drive me nuts.

This is of course not representative of all the types at all.

All of NU'EST's music videos because y'all need to support them right now

2012

Face (debut song about facing down a tough opponent, more specifically the bullies versus the bullied in school, bonus if u watch the mv u see predebut baby seventeen!!! seungcheol why are u such a bully)

Action (about not conforming to the crowds, standing up by yourself, acknowledging the pain of bullying victims and encouraging them to be themselves and show everyone how amazing they are, more electro (?) than Face)

Not Over You (missing an ex, still wanting to be with them, surprisingly upbeat if you consider the topic which is usually covered in ballads. very refreshing CUTE MV SO CUTE I LOVE HAPPY NU’EST WHAT A CONCEPT)

Sandy (innocent young love, very sweet and happy, great song to listen to if you want to cheer up, also MORE CUTE NU’EST THIS WAS SUCH A GOOD TIME THEY LOVE THEIR FANS SO MUCH)

2013

Hello (struggling in a one sided relationship, very sweet and soothing melody, their voices are like honey in your ears, RAP MONSTER EVEN SAID THIS WAS ONE OF HIS TOP FAVORITE SONGS STOP SLEEPING ON NU'EST)

Sleep Talking (a really trippy song, very unique but addictive beat, about wanting to confess to their dream girl, the mv always makes me laugh)

Fine Girl (funky pop song about how much they like their girl and how they want to show their feelings, THE MV IS SO CUTE WATCH IT NOW I’M  SO MUCH NU’EST)

2014

Good Bye Bye (leaving a painful love, this song is less electro and more of a smooth and slower tempo pop sound, if you watch the mv you can see a shirtless Minki I’m jUST SAYING)

2015

I’m Bad (regret from breaking up with a lover, reminiscing and wanting them back, saying they’re bad for leaving their love and that they aren’t good enough, slow but catchy, makes me think of walking down the street alone but during a sunny day you know? it just has that kind of vibe considering the beat and flow of their voices idk)

2016

Overcome (overcoming the struggles and troubles that come their way for their love, telling their lover to rely on them and that they’ll protect them)

Love Paint (Every Afternoon) (about their dull and boring life being renewed and brightened by their love, seeing the beauty in their love and life, very sweet song pls be aware that u might get a cavity from it)

Daybreak (by Minhyun & Jonghyun, I’m not even gonna spoil this one u have to go and listen to it for urself)

of course, NU'EST has many more songs than this! these are just their Korean music videos, they also have the other songs off their albums, so please take the time to show them love and support for their hard work!!!

Things I didn’t know Desmond could do 1/? - Mah boi pulling some John Wick style right here

YOI Fan Rec Friday

Thank you for all your recs this week! I can’t wait to read them all during my trip in Europe! If you didn’t know, I will be gone from June 17th-July 9th and may not be able to make fan rec friday or other lists while I’m gone! I will be bringing my laptop so hopefully I will be able to, but if not you now know why!

Rec’d by anonymous:
Six Hours Ahead by alipiee, Teen, 35k (WIP)
When Yuuri downloaded the harmless quiz app, he hadn’t expected to become best friends with the Russian boy who asked him for a rematch.

✧·゚: *✧·゚:*    *:·゚✧*:·゚✧

Rec’d by @rogovich :
The Next Level by azriona, Explicit, 82k (WIP)
The skating season continues (as skating seasons are wont to do), while Victor and Yuuri negotiate the shifts in their relationship, their careers, and their home rink. Sometimes, things even go as planned.

✧·゚: *✧·゚:*    *:·゚✧*:·゚✧

Rec’d by anonymous:
Gentlemen and Businessmen by Theladyofravenclaw, Teen, 21k
Yuuri Katsuki is a businessman in desperate need of a date for the week and instructions around L.A. Victor Nikiforov is a prostitute just doing his best to find some work to help pay the rent. When these two cross paths Victor and Yuuri are set up for a whirlwind of events as Victor finds himself thrown into the world of first-class society and Yuuri starts to question whether what his company does is right or wrong as they both find themselves falling more and more in love with each other. But as they fall in love with one another they become more aware of the fact that they only have one week together. And it’s almost over.

✧·゚: *✧·゚:*    *:·゚✧*:·゚✧

Rec’d by anonymous and @fisukisuki :
Driving Mr. Katsuki by CullinanKatsudon, Mature, 23k (WIP)
Yuuri Katsuki gets into Victor Nikiforov’s car, mistaking it for his Uber ride…and Victor doesn’t correct him. And then there’s a job interview, and mistaken identity, and some pole dancing, and ice skating lessons, and a Very Smitten Nikiforov, and a Nervous But Determined Katsuki, and what was supposed to be a quick, cute fic has turned into a novel, and that’s okay.

✧·゚: *✧·゚:*    *:·゚✧*:·゚✧

Rec’d by anonymous:
viktor nikiforov is a nightblogger by thishasbeencary, Teen, 2.9k 
Yuuri started a mental list of the small things Viktor did that annoyed him about a week after going to Russia, and texted Phichit every time he added something new.

✧·゚: *✧·゚:*    *:·゚✧*:·゚✧

Rec’d by anonymous:
To Yuri. by poppysicle, Mature, 5.2k (WIP)
Dear Yuri,
If you’re reading this, it will mean either two things happened. It was not in our control or you found this on accident. Before you start to freak out, we want you to know that we love you more than anything in this world. Our love for you has grown stronger than for each other. We will do anything for you if you asked us too. I found myself praying every night after finding you that we want to keep you safe.
You’ve become a big piece of our small, messed up life. We hope one day you will have a better one after being with us. We care about your happiness and well being. Please, never forget our time together and the love we built with one another.
To help, I am going to tell you a story about how our family became one.

✧·゚: *✧·゚:*    *:·゚✧*:·゚✧

Rec’d by anonymous:
Ptichye Moloko by lilithduvare, Melody_thysoulandthylove, Mature, 28k 
Viktor is a two time Academy Award winner actor who, while shooting a movie in Japan accidentally found a small cake shop Agape & Eros and instantly fell in love with the stunning desserts on display. He, however, did not expect to fall in love with the gorgeous but shy man who ran the shop.

✧·゚: *✧·゚:*    *:·゚✧*:·゚✧

Rec’d by anonymous:
One Night With The King by Pjkal, Mature, 22k (WIP)
Katsuki is a poor boy selected from a giant pool of men and women to attempt to become the new spouse of King Viktor Nikiforov. Is he able to charm his way into the heart of the king while hiding his true identity of being in the lower class? He adopted the name Yuuri and sets off in his adventure in the giant halls of the king’s palace, while avoiding the scrutinizing eye of Prince Yuri Plisetsky. Winning the king’s heart becomes more than just a quest for love as Prince Plisetsky plans to enforce cruel laws against Katsuki’s people.

✧·゚: *✧·゚:*    *:·゚✧*:·゚✧

Rec’d by anonymous:
of dusk and dawn and a love beyond by exile_wrath, Gen, 5.5k 
The King of Day, Victor, drops flowers to the Ruler of Night, Yuuri, to express his love for him; yet, they are always returned, as Yuuri thinks that they’re dropped by mistake.Victor cries and plucks wishes off the petals every time, remembering the time when once, they had been together.

✧·゚: *✧·゚:*    *:·゚✧*:·゚✧

Rec’d by anonymous:
Pigeon Alley by DiAnna44, Teen, 21k (WIP)
What’s meant to be will always find a way. Victor and Yuuri? They’re meant to be.

✧·゚: *✧·゚:*    *:·゚✧*:·゚✧

Rec’d by @nursewives :
Ode To Boy by nursewives, Teen, 4.3k (WIP)
Viktor Nikiforov stands on the top of the music charts and the height of his life. Detroit has been good to him, giving him new sights to see and more songs to write. The Detroit Ice Castle Night Club is his only reprieve from the exhaustion of fame and constant harassment. Viktor’s life begins to bore him when the lull of routine sets in. His life changes with a video link, a club night, and a pianist named Katsuki Yuuri.

✧·゚: *✧·゚:*    *:·゚✧*:·゚✧

Rec’d by anonymous:
‘Til I Tear the Walls, 'Til I Save Your Heart by ken_ichijouji (dommific), Explicit, 9.4k (WIP)
A chance encounter with a mysterious, beautiful man gives Katsuki Yuuri far more than he bargained for. There’s only one way for them to find salvation—an act of love and bravery on Samhain. If Yuuri doesn’t succeed, then he and his beloved are doomed.

✧·゚: *✧·゚:*    *:·゚✧*:·゚✧

Rec’d by anonymous:
Night is Young and the Music’s High by opalish, Teen, 3k
“Best press conference ever,” the Japanese Nationals silver medalist says when asked. “Ten out of ten, would medal again.”
“I would die for Katsuki-kun,” Minami declares, with terrifying sincerity.

✧·゚: *✧·゚:*    *:·゚✧*:·゚✧

Rec’d by anonymous:
Lampadaires Sous la Pluie by xuantime, Teen, 37k (WIP)
Yuuri is an elite, the best of the Time Arbitrators. As the youngest member of the formidable Scythes Squadron, he swears loyalty to the all-encompassing Organization. At least until whispers of a silver haired man and long-buried secrets reach his ears. Even shadows can hide in light, and as the cold truth reveals itself, so can forbidden questions.

✧·゚: *✧·゚:*    *:·゚✧*:·゚✧

Rec’d by anonymous:
Ah, deceit. by Nikiforlove, Gen, 11k (WIP)
Viktor is the head of the Russian Mafia, charming, sleek and confident. He’s a very hasty man, and he prefers fieldwork over office work, and Yakov’s pissed. Surprise, surprise! Yakov signed a contract with the Yakuza without Viktor’s consent, to get him a right hand man who would maybe, just maybe, make up for what Viktor lacks. Oh boy, Viktor is pissed, he’s fuming. Damn, all he wanted was to go on a date with that bespectacled cutie he met the other day at the cafe.

✧·゚: *✧·゚:*    *:·゚✧*:·゚✧

Rec’d by anonymous:
Charm Your Way by OwlBeDamned, Mature, 8.3k (WIP)
It is a well-known fact that newly-appointed Flying instructor, retired Russian Quidditch legend and seven-time winner of the senior World Cup, Viktor Nikiforov, is heads-over-heels in love with shy Charms professor Katsuki Yuuri.

✧·゚: *✧·゚:*    *:·゚✧*:·゚✧

Rec’d by anonymous:
Precocious by EmmyLynna, Gen, 109k (WIP)
Whatever Viktor Nikiforov wanted, he would get. And the moment his eyes locked onto the cute omega, he knew that Yuuri Katsuki would be his. That’s why during recess he marched over, held his hands, and proclaimed, “Yuuri, starting today, I’m your alpha and you’re my mate!” Much to the shock of their classmates and teachers. So what if he was only seven-years-old and Yuuri was six?

✧·゚: *✧·゚:*    *:·゚✧*:·゚✧

Rec’d by anonymous:
with these things i’ll never say by missmichellebelle, Gen, 1.8k
Yuuri has been Victor’s PA for well over a year now, but no matter how many times Victor has told him otherwise, he still leaves actual handwritten notes for Victor to find.

✧·゚: *✧·゚:*    *:·゚✧*:·゚✧

Rec’d by @blue-and-ironic :
Sweet on You by fuzzycatsandgoofyhats, Teen, 2.5k (WIP)
Victor Nikiforov is the owner of a popular bakery in St. Petersburg, and he loves it. But just when he starts to grow bored of the same routine every day a cute foreign college student comes to visit and suddenly becomes all Victor can think about…

✧·゚: *✧·゚:*    *:·゚✧*:·゚✧

Rec’d by @aurajenkins :
The Night Has A Thousand Eyes by LinneaKou, Teen, 54k (WIP) ***Major character death
A game of cat-and-mouse, playing out in an alternate Gotham, with some different (yet familiar) faces…Viktor Nikiforov is a wealthy, eccentric socialite who picks up where the law leaves off. Yuuri Katsuki operates on an alternate revenue stream. They fall in love. And sometimes fight crime.

✧·゚: *✧·゚:*    *:·゚✧*:·゚✧

Rec’d by anonymous:
Cherry Wood and Golden Robes by Skowronek, Not Rated, 21k (WIP)
When the up-and coming Japanese wizard Yuuri Katsuki arrives in Sochi for his most important duelling competition so far, he expects to flub his duel, embarrass himself, and panic. He doesn’t expect to exceed his own expectations and gain a rival in the process.

✧·゚: *✧·゚:*    *:·゚✧*:·゚✧

Rec’d by anonymous:
Droplets between us (keeping us together) by Natsumi, Teen, 2.3k
If Victor could stop the world for just a second to allow Yuuri to catch his breath, he would. Unfortunately, that isn’t possible. They’re both tired. There are ways to deal with it.

✧·゚: *✧·゚:*    *:·゚✧*:·゚✧

Rec’d by anonymous:
Victor’s Moving Castle by weeaboobiwrites, Teen, 28k (WIP)
A pointless war, a moving castle, a contract sealed in fire and a hood that can’t be removed. Yuuri can’t face anyone, Victor is an empty man with a deadline, and Yuri doesn’t know what he did to deserve being forced into the role of a wingman. This is the story of two boys, two curses, a cure that’s right in front of everyone’s noses, and the journey along the way.

✧·゚: *✧·゚:*    *:·゚✧*:·゚✧

Rec’d by anonymous:
story of my life by vodkawrites, Teen, 5.3k
There are 3,140,000 results on Google Search for why you should meet your idol. Meeting your idol could allow you to tell them personally how much they mean to you and can inspire you to be more like your idol. However, there are 20,300,000 reasons why you shouldn’t meet your idol.

✧·゚: *✧·゚:*    *:·゚✧*:·゚✧

Rec’d by anonymous:
My Boy Builds Coffins by ken_ichijouji (dommific), Teen, 4.9k (WIP)
Yuuri’s always dealt with a lot of (pun not intentional) grief about the family business, so much so he’s given up on making many friends or finding romance. But during one morning Starbucks rush, he meets a light-haired, blue-eyed man in dark colors and manicured nails who just might prove him wrong that no one will be able to get past his job.

✧·゚: *✧·゚:*    *:·゚✧*:·゚✧

Rec’d by anonymous:
Tale of Two Princes by VoidGlasses, Teen, 5.5k (WIP)
Viktor Nikiforov, Crown Prince of Petersburgia, is the most sought after Prince of all the kingdoms. He’s famous, gorgeous, and rumored to be rich. For years, he’s bought into and played up this image, but these days he’s losing interest in this life. It isn’t until a chance run in with Prince Yuuri of Yutopia that Prince Viktor realizes what he’s been missing. This tale follows the spontaneous Prince Viktor through his journeys with Prince Yuuri.

✧·゚: *✧·゚:*    *:·゚✧*:·゚✧

Rec’d by anonymous:
Chasing Moonlight: A tale of a Lost Prince by LiaoftheDawn, Teen, 18k (WIP)
Victor’s 27th birthday is approaching and all he wants for a present is a chance to see the lights up close. And maybe the handsome young man who somehow stumbled into his tower can help him with that.

✧·゚: *✧·゚:*    *:·゚✧*:·゚✧

Rec’d by anonymous:
Worlds Finest by counterheist, Teen, 1.8k
Intrepid journalist Yuuri Katsuki gets an assignment to interview billionaire international playboy slash ditz Viktor Nikiforov. Superman and Batman thwart a hostage situation.


Thank you for all your recs! ₍₍ (̨̡ ‾᷄♡‾᷅ )̧̢ ₎₎

The amazing “YOI Fan Rec Friday” banner was created by @omgkatsudonplease! I love them a lot, check out their blog!

Things Matthias deserves

  • love
  • happiness
  • cuddles from Nina
  • appreciation
  • waffles
  • warm sweaters
  • his friends
  • sunshine
  • hugs
  • wolf puppies
  • everything good because Matthias is amazing and deserves great things

Things Matthias doesn’t deserve

  • chapters 38-40 of Crooked Kingdom
  • being called a boring and dislikable character like come on yall
Memory Lane ft. Yoongi

Originally posted by allforbts

Drabble game #100: “I adore you.” 

grumpy husband yoongi au aka lots of fluff (mentions of sex)
→ 1.7k words

A/N: I recently had a realization that the way my blog is structured doesn’t really give me a great leeway to express my creativity and feels for the members at random. So this is the start to a really short series of drabbles for all of the members in super short (less than 2k) drabbles! To be continued! :) Hope you guys like it. 

more from this au: here, more drabbles: here


“You’ve got a wonderful wife there, son.”

Yoongi gives the elderly man a small smile and nods in agreement, clinking his beer can against his and tipping back the cold liquor into his throats with his eyes trained on you, a feat that happens quite often.

Often Yoongi finds himself just staring at you, in awe of how someone like you ended up with someone like him.

Your friends would describe you as sweet, bubbly, kind, selfless, and bright. His friends would describe you as “the light that shined in Min Yoongi’s horribly dreadful bitch ass life.” And although he always gives them a glare or just brushes their comments off with an eye roll it’s moments like these when he feels like the six dickwads’ words can never be any more accurate.

Keep reading

anonymous asked:

do you think life is worth living even if you never achieve anything noteworthy?

given the statistical unlikeliness that any single human being will exist on earth at a particular moment in time, living is pretty noteworthy.

yellowgoingblue  asked:

“i work at a little market/store and u came up to the register with a candy bar but didn’t have enough money to pay for the entire thing. but don’t worry, i got you, fam” au: I saw this and my mind screamed, "ANDREIL".

ok i combined both of these and neither is fully what you asked for but i hope you like it anyway!!!


It’s hot the way only New Jersey gets hot, America’s swampy asshole, thick damp air under an impermeable layer of smog, the sun mocking him from where it hangs between a few grey clouds that indicate but don’t promise an upcoming rain.

Neil’s jog is taking much, much longer than usual thanks to an unbearable amount of traffic. It doesn’t help that he’s had to reroute himself to get some British candy bar from the one Wawa that—without explanation—carries British candy bars.

He gets there eventually, eight miles away from his apartment and so fully dehydrated that he’s questioning how the fuck he’s going to make it back. Wawa is, as always, an oasis: refrigerators line the walls, and within them, blissfully, is cold water. He grabs a bottle and drinks half of it in the aisle before even going on the search for the Mars Bar.

The candy aisle has nothing, just mostly-depleted cardboard boxes of Snickers and Twix. The international section is mainly Latin American and Asian goods, and then, crammed between coconut water and Goya goods, a box of Mars Bars.

Like the boxes in the candy aisle, it’s empty.

Keep reading

doodles-by-di  asked:

How would the team (romanced and not) react to some one bashing the Inquisitior for being Bisexual. It's a common thing, and lots of people believe that if your Bi, you're twice as likely to cheat, or you're being greedy, or just making it up. It's worse when people say they you've been faking it and that there officially " straight" or "gay/lesbian" now depending on the partner. Even some lesbians and gays bash bisexuals.

Iron Bull: He’d bash their freaking skull in if he could. Instead, he towers over them, the Inquisitor hugged protectively to his side, and scowls menacingly. “Could you say that one more time? Yeah, I didn’t think so.” Then he hustles the Inquisitor away for crazy strong drinks and comfort. If Romanced: Pretty much the same thing, but he’ll kiss the Inquisitor before leading them away and make loud comments about how much he loves them as they drink.

Cassandra: Her head whips around toward the one who made the comment and for a second she’s sure she didn’t just hear what she thinks she heard. But she looks at the Inquisitor and sees that look, the one that means they’re hurt and trying not to show it, and she knows. She storms over and says absolutely nothing, but she glares down the offender until they scamper away. Then she pats the Inquisitor awkwardly on the shoulder. “What they think matters not at all,” she assures them. “You are a good person, I know you are.” If Romanced: She storms over takes the Inquisitor’s hand tightly in hers, partly to comfort them and partly to keep herself from flying into the attack and bashing someone’s brains in. Once the offender leaves she turns and kisses her lover. “You are perfect, and you are mine,” she tell them, arms around their neck, uncaring of who could see for once. “I don’t care what they think. I know you are a good person.”

Blackwall: He won’t confront the idiot who said it directly, but he’ll place himself discreetly beside the Inquisitor and glare from the sidelines until they leave. Then he’ll stay beside the Inquisitor, a silent guard to keep idiots away. If they try to thank him he’ll get uncomfortable. “Just doing what’s right,” he’ll mumble into his beard. If Romanced: He’s drawn to the Inquisitor’s side as if magnetized, taking their arm in his. Posture straight, he’ll stare down everyone around them and dare anyone to say anything. No one does.

Dorian: Oh, now they’re in trouble. Dorian definitely heard that, and he glides over smoothly and wraps his arm around the Inquisitor, leaning against them. He then proceeds to ignore the person in front of them entirely and speak of them and all the skeletons in their closet to the Inquisitor as though it is merely juicy gossip. If Romanced: He kisses his amatus right there for whatever pea-brained idiot to see. He absolutely does not care what anyone thinks; he’s spent his life as a pariah but he’ll be damned before his amatus has to suffer like that. He’s a good man and deserves better.

Josephine: Very quickly, the offender loses most of their personal fortune as their business interests flop. They’re all but ruined by the end of the night. If Romanced: She bustles over, friendly and bubbly, and without ever saying a single threatening word makes certain that the offender knows that they’ve just ruined themselves. Then she gives her lover a kiss on the cheek, smiling sweetly.

Sera: Oh HELL NO. Friends are going to mess that piss bag up! But first, a well-placed knee to the crotch. If Romanced: And suddenly honeytongue has a shadow that is kissing her neck while making awkwardly direct eye contact with the stupid piss bucket that would dare to insult Inky. If the offender dares to say anything else, a well-placed knee to the crotch is in order.

Cole: Whoever said it leaves before they even finish the comment, distracted by something trivial. The Inquisitor’s favorite treat mysteriously appears in their hand. “They’re wrong. You’re good. You try to help and your people love you. It doesn’t matter what they think. It hurts, but you know you and they can’t change that.”

Varric: “Let me tell you a story about this time my good friend Hawke did something really terrible, slightly illegal, and entirely blasphemous to someone who said those exact words. Then I’ll tell you a story about the time I did something really terrible, slightly illegal, and entirely blasphemous to someone who said those exact words. Oh, wait, that one hasn’t happened yet. It’s about to!”

Cullen: No, that’s not going to stand. He marches over and calmly begins discussing the intricate and incredibly boring details of trebuchets and their calibration requirements in a very passive-aggressive way. If Romanced: His one-sided discussion about trebuchets becomes vaguely threatening, his smile brittle and the hand that normally rests on his sword is gripping the hilt.

Leliana: With a lovely smile and music in her voice, she curses whoever uttered the insult to the deepest, darkest edge of the Void. Her agents disguised to blend in with the crowd flash weapons and make vaguely threatening remarks until the offender leaves Skyhold altogether.

Vivienne: And the offender has just been socially ruined for the rest of eternity by a small smile and a single question uttered by the Iron Lady. There will be no coming back from that.

Solas: With a smile, he wields kindness as a weapon, exaggerating compliments as the offender grows more and more flustered and embarrassed, realizing that they have mage a tragic mistake by daring to say such a thing to the Inquisitor. If Romanced: His gaze is as sharp as his tongue and if the offender doesn’t start crying right there they certainly will the moment they’re alone. “Do not allow them the satisfaction of hurting you, vhenan. You are perfect exactly as you are.”

Why we enjoy Sarah J Maas’s books:

Alright! So I finally got through all of the survey responses. I got over 300! However, I did have to throw out over 50 as many people decided to check more than 5 for likes or dislikes. And I don’t think google forms lets you limit the number they can check? Anyways, it’s fine because I still have 254 usable responses and tons of lovely quotes/thoughts/rants from all of you!!

I’ll put the data charts up top and then the long answer responses below, divided into sections.

So clearly, we are overwhelmingly here for the female characters, the character growth, and the romance. But we also like the morally grey characters, the world building, and the representation of PTSD, abuse, and mental health issues. 

I’m sorry that is so tiny, but basically, we overwhelmingly dislike the lack of diversity in terms of PoC and LGBTQ character and we also have some issues with world building, magic, and seeing our favs do problematic things. 

Also 18 of your hate Celaena lol (I love her and I know that putting that answer in there as a selection was petty af but I cannot help myself. It was all for a good laugh)


Alright, so most of us feel negatively and positively about the fandom. But a solid chunk, 34%, feels positively most-all of the time. Which is great. We are doin okay friends. Only 5.5%, 14 people, felt like the fandom affected them only negatively. 

So we clearly are here for enjoyment and escapism. And pain. 

Also, I apologize for the wet dreams one but THIS FANDOM LOVES SMUT I HAD TO PUT IT ON THERE OKAY

So 70% of the ppl reading to enjoy things and find it easy to ignore the things we dislike. 


And the long answers:

Enjoyment:

Some of us really enjoy the way she writes characters—she really makes us really care with backstory and character development:

“When I finally decide to shut the book, it takes me a minute to forget that the characters aren’t real. I’ve fallen in love with almost every single one of her characters because they’re so authentic; they go through hardships, they love, they fall out of love, they get angry, they grieve deeply, but most importantly, they GROW. I’m so impressed with who Feyre and Aelin have come to be as women over the years. The familial love that bonds the characters together is also something that I really connect to. They really would do ANYTHING to protect each other.” anonymous

“She delivers types of characters and points of view that other YA writers haven’t done. She pulls of tropes without making them boring. She isn’t afraid of calling characters out for doing the wrong thing.”- @the-heir-of-terrasen

“I think SJM’s character development is her biggest strength. I haven’t connected to so many characters in a series since Harry Potter. She is good at showing rather than telling when it comes to several moments of key character building, especially for . That I am so emotionally invested in such a wide variety of characters across two series is a testament to her gift.” -anonymous

“Her use of description and narrative really is eye-opening to the world of the characters in the most subtle of ways. She knows how to wield a character’s experiences and history to cleave new paths in their personalities, and thus makes ever-changing, ever-growing characters that are so much more relatable than most other fantasy books. Not to mention that her villains are just as mysterious and wicked as her protagonists, making even the antagonists realistic to the point of you *screaming* at the book for whatever the character has done this time.“ - @cynical-minds-for-cynical-times

“The Connection to the characters. I don’t relate so much as I do just care very, very deeply about them. I LIKE them, even if they aren’t likable people?” @squaddreamcourt

We also really enjoy how morally complex the characters are:

“What I love about SJM is that she doesn’t make things prettier than they are. She has not created a perfect world, with those perfect good characters finding a perfect happy ending. Instead she created a world that has loads of problems we’re also facing in our world and she shows us how layered and well thought out characters are dealing with them. Her characters grow and the emotional impact of their deeds is not shrugged off. I love it how everything they do has consequences and how the heroes make mistakes and bad decisions and how the villains do good things sometimes. What I love is that it’s a fascinating world with fascinating characters that gives me an unique view on our world.” @acourtofhopeanddreams

“The characters are very well-rounded and dynamic. Almost every character has a motivation for what and why they’re doing what they’re doing, which is something some villains lack in other stories. You find yourself hating the characters, but still enjoying the parts that they’re in because they are so realistic in their mannerisms and motivations.” anonymous

Her books help us deal with personal issues, and we also seem to enjoy how relatable or realistic the personal relationships between the characters are:

“I feel like her books help me a lot, for one thing because they make me feel excited and enthusiastic about something which I think everyone needs more of in their life. I also love the platonic and romantic relationships between the characters because they educate me about abusive relationships, healthy relationships, and the complications of friendships etc. I love this because I feel like it helps me understand myself and the people around me better emotionally, and puts my own personal experiences with other people in perspective. I also find a lot of the things that go down between the characters help me feel more secure about my personal life, and they help me accept myself for feeling the way I do about certain things. Also, I love just love reading them because I find them really fun and enjoyable.“ - @ashryverblue

“I enjoyed the way she wove my favorite fairy tales together and wrote compelling romance. I also connected to the characters and appreciated how she prioritized female pleasure in sex.“ - @sarahviehmann

“The representation of mentally ill and abused characters and their arcs that deals with their past and their issues that isnt “love fixes everything” -anonymous

“also like how they don’t have the common ‘no body likes me because I’m ugly I’m so sad boo ho’ because I never really related to those characters. I want to read about someone who is confident in their body and with their skills, and not someone who is whiny and needs someone to hold their hand through everything.” @a-book-love

“Feyre’s struggle with abuse and PTSD in ACOMAF was relatable and her growth is inspiring. I love her relationship with Rhys and the understanding and respect they have for one another. I love Rhys and his Inner Circle - they’re funny, kind, intelligent, strong, witty etc. I like that Rhys, Mor, Az, and Cassian are abuse survivors - it gives me hope. I love how supportive they are of one another. Of course, I love the magic and world-building in the series but the characters and their relationships are what stand out to me the most in this series.” @pencilsfulloflead

And some of us are here for the drama (myself included):

“Honestly these are the most dramatic books I’ve read, which I love. My favorite thing about fanfiction is how character focused they are, all the big sweeping emotional gestures, all the angst and drama. Give me all that shit. SJM’s books give me that but with original characters/a new world/etc. which allows me new content with those same tropey, dramatic things that I love, with good writing. “ anonymous

“GOD I WISH I KNEW, I HAVE ALWAYS CONSIDERED MYSELF BEING HELD IN THIS FANDOM AGAINST MY WILL AND BETTER JUDGEMENT. I guess I’d say the characters– while I wouldn’t call them “relatable” necessarily– are engaging, and the light fantasy trappings, digestible (though not refined) prose, fast pace, exciting-if-not-necessarily-logically-sound plot twists, and heightened drama create an exciting tableau/ fertile ground for indulgent romance narratives/ heavy interpersonal dramas, which SJM does well. There’s also lots of side characters/ unexplored plot or world-related threads prime for creative exploration that make the world fun to explore as a fic writer.“ @valamerys

“The books have an element of wonder to them; my jaw was wide open during the scene in HOF when all the witches drummed for Abraxos and during the Weaver scene in ACOMAF. Aelin never fails to make me laugh, and on the flip side, her story in HOF is my absolute favorite.” @screaming-at-billiards

And finally, this little snippet that I thought explained why most of us read for the female characters:

“that the women don’t need men to be powerful”


Dislike:

So we clearly have some issues with the diversity…

“Two black girls died for white pain (Dorian/Sorscha and Aelin/Nehemia) in back to back books.”

“I would like to see more POC and LGBT characters because I feel like with the powerful messages and arcs these characters go through it would be beneficial not only to the storyline (with experiences like racism and LGBT discrimination to add to their issues and how they deal with them) but to how people read the book.”

“She messed up big time with ACOWAR and how poorly she treated Mor’s trauma.”- anonymous

“I can’t think of a general thing I dislike about Sarah’s books. I know lack of/poorly handled diversity is an issue but as a straight white female I tend to let others speak on this as I don’t feel like it’s my place to say whether or not POC/LGBTQ+ characters are represented well/enough. Other than that there are plot points, conversations, small things, etc. that I wish had gone differently but that’s my nitpicking and personal preference.” anonymous
“Primarily it’s the lack of representation and understanding of diversity, but recently with acowar I felt she became too busy and it was a bit rushed and unfinished.” @fcyrearcherxn

“Eh I wish it [descriptions of skin color] was clearer so ppl would stop drawing illiryans white” @acourtoffeyreandaelin

And some of us have issues with world building…

“Sjm seems to think about a lot of things while writing, but she doesn’t think them all the way through. For example, the magic system, the references to mythological characters/creatures from multiple cultures and smashed together, etc. I get the sense that even if she has to outline for her publisher, there is still so much that just isn’t thought about with enough attention to detail.“ @abookandacoffee


How dislike affects our reading:

Some of us are not affected by the things we dislike:

“Not at all really, if anything it just fuels fanfiction.” anonymous

“Literally not at all. Even if there are things I dislike, I still love the characters and their stories.” anonymous

“they mildly irritate me until i get over it about 4 minutes later” anonymous

“not much tbh, I just skipped that shit lol” @squaddreamcourt

Some of us were disappointed by acowar and the world building issues it raised affected our enjoyment:

“It makes me cringe when I read it, and honestly all the issues in ACOWAR made it harder for me to get into. Some illogical (even with magic in place) things in the end battle made it impossible for me to focus on the end of the book, cause I still couldn’t get over how little sense what had just happened made. Which was the opposite of ACOMAF, I couldn’t get enough of that book.” - @nightinsurgent

Some of us are negatively affected by the way SJM has handled certain issues:

It [ Mor’s trauma in acowar] honestly ruined the entire book for me and I try to pretend like the third book isn’t even canon.” -anonymous

“Sometimes it can put a downer as I’m a POC I can sometime realise I can’t fully relate to all characters but usually i brush it off as I realise that all books have faults.”-anonymous

And some of us feel guilty for enjoying these books despite the issues:

“I have at times (particularly after major online discussions) felt guilty for taking pleasure from something that hurt another person’s feelings.“- anonymous 


How the fandom affects our enjoyment:

Some of us love the fandom and how it leads to deeper understandings of the story:

“I LOVE fandom. It makes me feel like I’m part of something and that I have people who are there for me. It also gives me new ways of obsessing about the series, and I love seeing other people’s interpretations and feelings about the books, especially when they point out things that I haven’t noticed before. It just gives me a deeper, richer reading experience and it’s like I’m always partly in the world of the books, because I’m always thinking about them and in that sense they never really leave me and are always a part of me.“ @ashryverblue

“WE RIDE AND DIE TOGETHER SO NOTHING IS TOO PAINFUL WHEN YOU HAVE EACH OTHER” -anonymous

For some of us, fandom really affects how we enjoy the books and how we think about certain aspects and characters:

“I’ve always been a critical reader but I wonder if I didn’t have a medium to see, read, and interact with my criticisms that I would let them go easier.”- anonymous

“I can mostly ignore it but sometimes it makes me feel shame for liking the books as much as I do. I also can get past it because I think some people are way to harsh and expect perfect characters which is not what I’m here for. Also, even if improvement in terms of representation is slow at least sjm has made some changes which is something most authors would never do.”-anonymous

“I get to see both sides of all the arguments and my own opinions are sometimes changed based on an argument someone might present considering any topic, which expands my horizons and makes it more enjoyable for me.” @angrydinosauryouth

“I don’t think I would care about Suriel’s death so much if it wasn’t for this fandom who made him a drama loving queen. Things like that” @jmaas-books-lover

We are disappointed with the fandom recently:

“At first I loved how we were all interacting, but the fandom has grown so negative and condemning of any differing opinions. I don’t mean people being called out others for saying abusive characters are not abusive, but people seem to go to war over inconsequential opinions that don’t harm anyone.” @nightinsurgent

“The ACOTAR fandom in particular used to be really lovely and amazing, and there are still groups with whom that is still true. Everyone let people think about and enjoy what they wanted as long as we weren’t perpetuating or justifying abuse, and it was a very supportive environment. It’s less so, now, and people are defending the text just to defend it, which is frustrating to me both as a fic writer AND a reader.” @sarahviehmann

“What gets at me is the clouds of negativity… And it seems really  hard to avoid sometimes, especially in such a small fandom. And when a few vocal members, who otherwise make good stuff, get very negative it gets worse…”

Some of us love the books despite what the fandom has to say:

“The fandom itself doesn’t affect my love of the books, I make my own opinions about them. But the fandom is severely affecting my enjoyment of being a part of the fandom.” @miladyaelin

Some of us enjoy parts of the fandom, but have serious issues with how the fandom reacts negatively to certain aspects of the books:

“Parts of the fandom really make me happy and allow me to discuss my thoughts and feelings about the books. There’s an amazing community of people. But there is a huge part of the fandom which really, really negatively affects my experience through heavy, harsh, and often unnecessary criticism. That’s not to say that we shouldn’t be critical and shouldn’t discuss the issues in her books, but there’s almost a frenzy about it now to the point where those of us who enjoy her books are made to feel bad about it. Yes, she has problems. But there has been significant improvements that no one seems to want to acknowledge. The second something new is released it’s torn into shreds and if you have a different opinion then you’re wrong. (For example, how Morrigan’s coming out was handled. Everyone has been saying how bad it was and how Sarah really messed it up, but I’m bisexual and I now really relate to Mor and the way she came out and her reasoning for not doing so before was incredibly real and believable to me. It seems that a lot of the people (though obviously not all) who criticise the lack of diversity in SJM’s books aren’t actually diverse themselves and are just on some sort of crusade to make themselves look like better people.) Why can’t some of us just enjoy a book for what it’s worth?” anonymous

ENTP Care and Handling User Guide and Manual

This manual is part of a series brilliantly thought up by @intpboard

Congratulations! You’ve come into possession of a rare and often exhausting ENTP unit! Now that you have your very own ENTP here are a few helpful tips and tricks to maximize the fun on their maelstrom of…. stuff…..

Your ENTP comes with:

  • Four everyday outfits
  • One extra snazzy suit for special occasions
  • One mobile device for research and communication purposes
  • One laptop for next-level research and communication
  • One gaming console and accessories
  • Five complex strategy games

Software

Your ENTP comes preprogrammed with the following traits:

Ne: Your ENTP can generate 45,673 ideas per minute, change subjects at a rate that will make you dizzy, and is always interested in anything and everything. Loves to make comparisons or analogies that make no sense but they will insist it works perfectly.  

Ti: Your ENTP unit will want to analyze and understand ALL THE THINGS. If interested, will demand as many details as possible. They may process by arguing to see all sides of a situation or idea. Favorite questions are why? And what do you mean?

Fe: Your ENTP has the uncanny ability to pick up on other’s emotions, and will occasionally push to see just how far they can go socially. Low-key cares about people and their opinions and doesn’t really like conflict among friends or loved ones (but good luck getting them to admit it).

Si: As this is their lowest function, your ENTP unit will struggle to keep track of things and lose their keys frequently. Also, makes them prone to buck tradition in favor of doing something novel, but may have strong attachments to certain memories or people.

Getting Started

  1. Place your ENTP in front of an open computer with the internet browser open.
  2. Tell them that they can’t accomplish something.
  3. Show them your favorite meme.
  4. Challenge them to beat you at your favorite strategy game.
  5. If your ENTP unit has not booted up yet, bring 2-3 friends to talk about their nerdy interests or favorite TV shows.

Modes

Eccentric Scientist Mode (default): Your ENTP will get very excited by whatever random idea or talent or skill happens to catch their eye and obsessively research it on the internet for a good 2-3 days. Then they will dedicate their life (and a considerable financial investment) to master this project. Within two weeks it will be added to the clutter of abandoned or “In progress” projects in favor of something new.

Tony Stark (default): Your ENTP will fire up their impressive mental capacities to whirr through countless ideas and possibilities to find the best possible solution for nearly any situation. Be forewarned; just because an idea makes sense to them and they are convinced that it’s amazing, doesn’t mean it’s actually foolproof.

Manipulative Bastard: When your ENTP brings their tertiary Fe out to play they can be manipulative little bastards.They are scarily perceptive of what others are feeling and thinking. On the innocent side, they’re sassing you back within hours of meeting you. On the devious side, they know just how to pull your strings to get what they want.

Detached Robot: Activated when your unit is angry, stressed, or sad. If your ENTP unit refuses to “talk about it,” complains bitterly that life always sucks, or removes themselves from society to bury in a project, then things are BAD. Resist the urge to push ENTP to open up about it or fix their problems for them. Chances are your unit has already been overthinking the situation and needs a mental escape. To restore to default mode: keep them company and try to redirect their attention to a favorite project or interest.  

Relationships with Other Units

NF: Your ENTP unit will often appreciate the depth and understanding of the NFJ’s and enjoys the random and giggly fun that comes with the NFPs. Caution is advised, however, as NF’s care quite a bit about their feelings and opinions, which your ENTP may find to be boring or muddled.

NT:  Relationships with NT types can go one of two ways for your ENTP:. They will either be in mutual delight over how logical and similar the NT’s brain is or your ENTP will reject the NT as useless, arrogant, and not worth tolerating. They can either end up as an awesome power duo or a cold rivalry.

SJ: Your ENTP will most likely view SJs as useful tools to uphold society, but not good for much else. Your unit will tend to be aggravated by their reliance on tradition or repetition but could stand to learn a thing or two about order and stability.

SP: This combination is double trouble. Your ENTP secretly admires the SP mastery of their physical environment and will often attempt feats that are beyond their abilities when around SP types, especially XSTP.  Generally, they get along well but don’t leave your unit unsupervised with a group of SPs.

Feeding

Your ENTP will forget to eat if not reminded. When left to their own devices, will often skip meals and then wonder later why they are dizzy, grouchy, or exhausted. Feed regularly to ensure they maintain a balanced diet and peak mental efficiency.

Grooming

Your ENTP will often put effort into picking out outfits and combinations, only to throw on whatever works for that day and cover the rest with charisma. Remind your ENTP to brush their teeth, shower, and exercise, as they often forget to do so for periods of 2-3 days.

Sleeping

Your ENTP generally views sleep as a waste of time and do so only when absolutely necessary.  The preferred sleeping pattern is to stay up through the night and catch up by taking naps throughout the day. ENTP will stubbornly insist that this works (it doesn’t). Send them to bed anyway.

Frequently Asked Questions

Why do ENTPs like talking with people, even those they aren’t particularly fond of? What do they find in that?

Your ENTP’s Tertiary Fe enjoys watching people react to things, especially things the ENTP causes. They derive a certain smug pleasure from watching people react predictably (Ti) to purposely offensive, crazy, or outlandish actions or claims. On a less sinister note, your ENTP most likely views pretty much everyone in the world as a potential friend or resource, so they are more than happy to connect and see what happens.

My ENTP won’t shut up about season 6 of Battleframe Nebula. What do I do?

Your ENTP unit is very excited about their newly discovered interest and likely is one of the most knowledgeable persons in existence on the subject. Ask two or three generic questions about their new interest, such as what do you like about [insert name of new interest]? Or ask them to explain it. Above all, do not panic: within two weeks they will have forgotten about Battleframe Nebula.

My ENTP has decided that organizing or planning things is a waste of time. How do I fix it??

Your ENTP unit has most likely decided that things will work just fine if they go with the flow. Your unit has a preference for keeping their calendar in their head, which is subject to constant change. Point out to your unit that a keeping a written schedule helps them see where they are budgeting their time and helps others know when the ENTP will be available for socializing.

to quote the inimitable chira:

(via chirart)

captive prince is a fantasy-historical romance novel trilogy by australian author c. s. pacat! i actually think it’s a little cheaper on the play store than amazon; i only paid $20 aud for it in total. there are also 4 short stories set in the universe, 3 of which have currently been released: green but for a season (a midquel), the summer palace, and the adventures of charls (both sequels).

i’ve always described it as a thoughtful, sweet political romance with a trashy gay porno aesthetic; you have to like one of these things, and at minimum tolerate the other, in order to enjoy it. i personally love it very much but it’s not the sort of thing i would recommend to everyone; there’s a dearth of female characters, some disturbing content, and the premise can definitely be alienating, especially to usa audiences.

some big content and trigger warnings: slavery, rape, abuse, CSA, corporal punishment, animal death, and just general corruption and treachery. it’s not gratuitous; for a point of reference, if you made it through the game of thrones TV show, i reckon you’ll be fine here. but bad things do happen, ceaselessly, throughout book 1, though nothing is fetishized, things improve immediately in book 2, and the series does a good job of resolving all that conflict and drama in a believable way so when the characters finally fall in love, you are right there with them.

i can’t lie, it does take a lot of Dealing With Things to get through the series – i only barely made it through book 1. but i do really think it’s worth it! it’s a very rich, dense narrative, but the writing is clever and unadorned enough to lead you through without it becoming frustrating or boring. the series is a mess of trauma and betrayal, but the ending is wholly and unambiguously happy. it’s written by a queer australian, like me! and the romance is. oh my god, it is so good. it is so good. the happy ending is so bone-deep satisfying, because you come to admire the characters so much, and their joy is just utterly gratifying to see.

if anyone needs more detailed content warnings, could you please send me an ask off anon, or PM me! and be safe; if you’re not sure you’ll be able to enjoy the series, just skip it. the only important info you need to retain is that damen and laurent are in love.

Guest: Part 1

You ask Harry to be your date to a wedding. But just as friends, of course…

————————————————————————————————-

Originally posted by intoyouharryarchive

You had never been more perplexed over the word, “Guest”.

The wedding invite in your hand had arrived at your door a few hours prior and, while the upcoming wedding itself wasn’t news (you had known that your two friends would end up getting married arguably before they did), the little “(Y/N) + Guest” notation at the bottom was unexpected. You currently weren’t dating anyone and hadn’t been for quite a while; at least long enough for your friends not to assume that you would be bringing someone.

But, there it was, in plain, black ink: (Y/N) + Guest.

You bit your lip and read the invite again, wondering if maybe they had just allotted one guest for everyone because they had a huge budget. All of your other close friends were already invited to the wedding in the first place; who on earth were you expected to bring?

It was one friend’s suggestion of, “What about Harry?” that currently had you in fits of nerves and bouts of overthinking. Harry was a pal, sure, but you certainly weren’t close enough to him that you could just waltz right up and ask him to be your date to a wedding. He didn’t even know the bride and groom, but he did know many of your other friends that would be in attendance.

It wasn’t that you weren’t friendly with Harry. You had known each other probably about five years now and always ended up hanging out whenever he was around, though it was typically in a group. You got along well, laughed a lot, enjoyed the same things and had a lot in common. But you weren’t close. He wasn’t the type that you would just call up on a Friday night if you were bored; you were way too self conscious to do that, even though he didn’t act like Harry Styles when he was around you.

He was also incredibly good looking and charming, and that scared you. The idea of being seen at a wedding with Harry Styles just felt like you were opening yourself up for ridicule. You were generally okay with how you looked, but Harry was like a Greek god compared to pretty much everywhere else.

Truth be told, you had a bit of a crush on him. It was a harmless crush, because when he was away you didn’t really think about him at all, but he did manage to make you nervous and give you butterflies every time you saw him.

The idea of asking Harry to be your wedding date had been pinching at the back of your mind for weeks now. The wedding was still a few months away, but you still hadn’t sent in an RSVP to confirm whether you were coming alone or with someone else.

“Have you asked him yet?”

That was the first question your friend consistently asked you ever since she had suggested it. Your response was always the same and becoming a bit exasperating, if you were being honest.

“How am I supposed to ask him?”

Your friend crossed her arms and gave you a smirk.

“Well…how about, ‘Hey Harry, would you like to come to this wedding with me?’”

You sighed, throwing yourself back on your bed and bringing your arms up to cover your face.

“I can’t just ask him like that! It would be weird.”

“I feel like it wouldn’t be…”

“I don’t know him that well.”

“You’ve known him for four years!”

“Yeah, but we never hang out alone!”

“He’d say yes.”

“You don’t know that.”

“No, but I have a pretty good idea.”

Your conversations went on like this until your friend finally got tired of arguing with you. The rational part of your mind knew that, in all likelihood, Harry would say yes if you asked him. As long as he was around and didn’t have any other plans, he had no real reason to turn you down. But the part of your brain that kept overthinking things – the one that was usually in the forefront – had run through 50 different scenarios in which you asked him and he said no, or you just ended up making a complete fool of yourself.

Finally, you couldn’t put off your RSVP any longer; the wedding was drawing near and your friends needed numbers. Harry had been in London for quite a while now, with a few quick trips to the US scattered here and there, but you had seen him more in the last six months than you had in the past few years.

“Ask him!” your friend hissed, almost shoving you in Harry’s direction as you and a large group of your friends were just about to leave a restaurant.

Keep reading

Jet Lag and Chinese: Part 2

Prompt: As Clark Kent’s best friend and kind of sister you’re used to the strange. Still seeing him get cozy with Wonder Woman is more strange than you’re used to. So when the chance to cozy up to a billionaire playboy comes around, who are you to say no? 

Part 1


  When that knock wakes you up at three in the morning, you consider killing whoever is on the other side. You pull yourself out of bed, your comforter wrapped around your shoulders, and make your way to the door.

   You open is to find Clark, Diana, and an unconscious Batman between them. An unconscious Batman who is bleeding all over your floor. You look them in the eye, and ask, “You realize I’m a photographer and not a doctor, right?”

   Clark rolls his eyes, and pushes his way inside. “Duly noted. The bleeding has stopped for the most part, but he’s under some sort of alien drug. Hal got a cure, but it’ll be a while before he comes out of it.”

   You close the door behind them, “So you need a place to stash him?”

Clark shrugs, “He’s part of the team, and he’s damn good at what he does.”

You blink as Clark puts him on the couch, “You were just complaining about him yesterday.”

“You complain about your sister all the time.”

“My sister is an entirely different matter.”

   “Clark.” Diana’s voice is soft, a reminder.

   He let’s out a deep breath, “Right. We have to go. We’ll collect him in a few hours. Stay inside and don’t get yourself killed.”

   You wave him off, and turn on the T.V. knowing that you won’t be getting back to sleep. You collapse in your armchair and watch the chaos unfold. You’re more than a little bitter that Clark hadn’t given you a heads up that something was going down. Your passion was photography, and things like this called your name. To tell the story of what was happening. The true story.

   After about six hours, you guest begins to stir. You glance at him, as he sits up. You meet his gaze and he simply says, “You’re Clark’s friend.”

   You nod, “Change of clothes is in the bathroom, feel free to shower too.” He stares at you, and you stare back, “I already know the secret identities of ninety percent of the League. One more won’t kill me.”

His voice is gruff, “It might.”

You shrug, “Then don’t. Sit there in the blood and filth on my couch. I’m going to make Clark buy me a new one anyway.”

His lips quirk slightly, “Are you now?”

You smile, “My guests are mainly reporters, they tend to pick up on things like blood stains.”

You watch him leave for the bathroom, and listen as the shower turns on. Your attention remains on the TV, while you pull out the breakfast fixings; cereal, bread, milk, butter, bowls. After about twenty minutes the doors opens and you stare at the man standing in your bathroom doorway.

He raises one eyebrow and asks, “Are you surprised?”

You screw your mouth into a pondering look, “Not completely. Makes sense, who else would have the money for Batman’s toys. Bruce Wayne fits.”

He nods before moving into the kitchen, and pouring himself a bowl of cereal, his eyes remain glued to the television screen, “How bad is it?”

“Not the worst thing to have happened. They’re in cleanup mode right now.” You take a bite of cereal.

“And whose clothes am I wearing?”

“Clark’s.”

He nods, “Excellent. Then it really will be his fault when I kill him.”

You hide your smile behind a spoonful of cereal, “Not a fan of plaid and blue jeans.”

His scowl said it all, “I’m not a fan of him continually asking me out to his family farm to relax. And insisting I’m made for farm life.”

You can’t help it, you laugh, “You’ll have to excuse him. He’s been hit in the head one too many times.”

“You don’t think I’m made for farm life.”

You smile, “You have city boy written all over you. You’d survive, you’ve been through worse. But you’d be bored within minutes, and murderous by the time lunch hits. I’m the same way, and I grew up in Smallville.”

He raises an eyebrow and asks, “Thrill seeker?”

You shrug, “I’m a photographer. A damn good one. It allows me to go where I want, when I want.”

“I bet the boy scout loves that.”

You scowl, “He’s the over protective brother I never asked for.”

“Only child?”

You shake your head, “one younger sister. We’re not on speaking terms. Parents have been in and out of jail since I was a kid. My grandmother raised me. But she was up there in years, and could only do so much. The Kent’s were nice enough to help out.”

He grins at you, before pouring himself a cup of coffee, his eyes flicking to the television screen. You sit there in silence for several minutes before his phone rings. You listen as he talks, assuring the person on the other line that he’s fine.

You meet his gaze unashamed as he hangs up. He smirks at you, “Looking to write a tell all?”

You smirk, “Clark does the writing, I just take the pictures. That being said, a picture of Bruce Wayne in jeans would set me up for quite a while.”

He smiles back, “Or you could let me take you to dinner.”

You raise an eyebrow, “You really want Clark to kill you, don’t you?”

He answers your question with one of his own, “Aren’t you a thrill seeker?”

“Absolutely. But something tells me that you, Bruce Wayne, may very well be the adventure of my life.”

Girl Next Door

Y/N had grown up next to Harry her whole life, he had only been two years older so they got along like peanut butter and jelly, ever since Y/N and Harry could walk they had been attached at hip. He came over and would have a tea party with her, she would tug at his curls, attempting to put a crown on him, he never minded. She would run over and play soccer with him, kicking the ball around, getting mud all over her.

Harry, and everyone else, thought of her as the perfect girl next door. Her father, a lawyer, her mother a stay at home mom, a helicopter mom. She watched her daughter all the time, making sure she was studying and getting the right marks at school. She pushed Y/N to join everything and anything she could. Y/N, of course, listened. She was active in middle school, she was on student council and drama club, between those two and studying she hardly saw Harry, and the two started to drift apart.

In high school Harry had found his group, a group Y/N did not like, and her parents hated. They made Y/N cut all ties with the Styles boy. Harry had traded in his soccer ball for drinks, he traded in his silly puns for sex, and his clean skin for tattoos and piercings. Y/N at first was upset, but then she found herself too busy to care.

Y/N had started at the bottom, literally. She began as a base for cheering, and by her sophomore year she was a flyer. Her junior year she was voted as caption, which her mother loved, but Y/N, not so much. With being caption, class president, and vice president of drama club she found herself overwhelmed. Her school life began at seven am and didn’t stop till one am, she forced herself to stay awake and study, keeping college in mind at all times.

Every once and a while she would peek out her window, where she could see into Harry window. When they were little they would write notes to each other, holding them up to window. When they reached middle school they would call each other, but sit by the window and watch each other as they spoke into the phone, Harry would watch as she would giggle at a stupid joke, and stick her tongue out at him. She would watch him run a hand through his long brown curls, which he now had chopped off. Now when she looks over the room would be empty, the lights off, or she would catch him smoking out the window, blowing out the toxin into the air. When Harry looked over she was always sat on her bed, studying, or she was at her desk working on another essay. Things weren’t the same anymore.

Before Y/N would tell Harry everything, on her worst nights, when she just couldn’t sleep, Harry would climb into her window and hold her close. They would whisper to each other, coming up with plans for the future. Y/N and Harry would run off to New York, where Y/N could be a dancer on Broadway, and Harry would find his career in music, they would be the best of friends, sharing an apartment and laughing all the time. They would run out and one am and get Chinese food and walk Times Square, they would camp out to watch shows, it seemed so simple, so real, at the time. Now she’s left alone in her room, not being able to sleep, the tears leaving her eyes every night.

“Hey,” Jade places a hand on Y/N’s shoulder, grabbing the girl’s attention.

Y/N hadn’t even noticed how she drifted off, staring at her former best friend. He leaned against his locker, arm draped over a girl’s shoulder, a smirk on his lips as he looked down at her. She was giggling, her cheeks red as she trailed her hand up and down his chest.

“Sorry,” Y/N blushed, closing her locker and turning to the blonde, “what were you saying?”

“The girls and I are going to get our nails done after school if you want join!” Jade smiled, gripping her books.

Y/N smiled softly, “oh I wish,” she pouts, “but I have rehearsals.”

“You’re in need of a break,” Jade says, “how do you live?”

“I’m not sure,” Y/N responds, a breathless chuckle leaving her lips.

The bell rings and she turns, “I’ll see you tonight at the game,” Y/N called, walking down the hall.

She waves to a couple of people as she walks to her class. Once Y/N reaches her room she slips into her seat, pulling her note book and pen out. Harry walks into the room, walking all the way to the back where his friends sat. His eyes land on Y/N, she’s doing what she has done for years when she was stressed, twirling her hair around her finger and then lightly tugging on it.

Harry can’t help but admire her body in the uniform she’s wearing. She had grown up for sure, the blue and white fabric hugged her body, showing off her tiny waist and her nice handful of boobs, Harry was sure if she bent down he would be able to catch a glimpse of her bum. He frowned when Scott pulled up the chair next to her, shrugging off his letterman jacket and kissing her cheek. Just like the perfect caption of the team and girl next door she had the perfect boyfriend.

Harry hated Scott Edelman more than he hated anyone else in the world. The guy seemed to make everyone smile, he was nice, and perfect for her, but Harry never trusted him. Scott’s hand would sometimes slip lower than Y/N wanted, and sometimes his eyes would linger on her chest when she wouldn’t notice, but Harry did, he could see it from down the hall.

“How was your morning?” Scott asked, tapping his fingers on the desk.

“It was good, I went for a run, nothing big, Mr. Brown is killing me though. He just edited my essay and I have to go home and fix it tonight after the game,” Y/N answered, rubbing her forehead, “what about you?”

“It was okay, does this mean you aren’t coming over after the game?” Scott frowned.

“I’m sorry,” Y/N says.

Scott sighed, leaning back. Anytime he invited Y/N over and she knew his parents weren’t home something always came up, and he was getting tired of it.

“Are you actually going to sleep with me or are you going to be a stuck up prude for the rest of your life,” Scott whispered, anger clear in his tone, “if you loved me you would sleep with me.”

“It’s because I love you I’m going to give you this warning,” Y/N says, her voice low, she leans over so her lips are next to his ear, “if you so much as touch me when I say no, or keep pushing me to sleep with you, I will kick you so hard in the dick you won’t ever be able to please yourself again let alone another human being.”

She pulled away, sitting back in her seat, her eyes on the board as the teacher begins to speak. The rest of her day goes by quick, rehearsal dragged on too much for her liking.

Harry hardly attended football games, but tonight was different, and he was thankful his friend dragged him out. He had promised Nina, the girl draped around his arm earlier, that he would take her home after the game, but he couldn’t focus on her. Instead, as always, his eyes drifted to Y/N. She was in the air, two girls gripping her ankles, her right hand on her hip, her other up in the air as she smiled at the fans in the crowd.

“She’s hot, I hear her and Scott are getting it in after the game,” Niall remarked, handing Harry the flask he had hidden in his jacket.

Harry takes it, letting the alcohol fall down his throat, “nah, she’s too much of a prude,” Harry shakes his head, chuckling, “she’s all about waiting for marriage.”

“Boring,” Niall rolled his eyes, everyone around them stood up to cheer, “are you hanging out with Nina afterwards?”

“Maybe, she’s getting a little too clingy for my liking,” Harry sighed.

“She a good fuck?” Niall raised an eyebrow, grabbing the flask and putting it back in his pocket.

“She’s okay, maybe I’ll ring up Stella,” Harry said.

“I’m gonna go smoke,” Harry says as halftime rolled by.

He walks down the stairs and goes down the alley way to head towards the school. He stops, hearing a small sob, a sob he heard too many times in his childhood. He peeks around the corner to see Y/N pressed against the wall, Scott has her arms pinned over her head, kissing her neck.

“Stop,” she pleads.

Harry feels his blood boiling, his fist tightening, but before he can act she does it herself. Her knee bending, and kicking up in between Scotts legs. Scott groans, backing away, and she shoves at him, making him tumble back.

“Don’t ever touch me again,” she yelled, sniffling and wiping her eyes, “or I’ll report you for harassment.”

Harry watches as she walks briskly towards him, she freezes, seeing him in front of her. Her eyes are glossy, her lipstick is smudged, cheeks pink and puffy. She looks scared and her hair is slightly a mess, her arms crossed over her chest, hugging herself. They stand, eyes connected, she can’t help but not look into the same green eyes she used to love, the same eyes that would watch her dance around her room.

She drops her head, walking past Harry, her shoulder bumping into his arm. Harry sucks in a sharp breath, walking towards Scott, he hits his side, a quick and hard kick making Scott groan, “if you so much as look at her, I swear to god, I’ll kill you myself,” Harry says, spitting near his head.

Part Two