booz cruise

some of my favorite silly plotlines from Scottish ballads
  • Small village thinks illicit whiskey stills are its biggest problem until raiders show up and trash their everything. Death, destruction, etc. Raiders find whiskey still, get lit, pass out. Villagers murder them. Peace restored. Whiskey is king.
  • Shepherd lad spots fair maid skinny-dipping. Fair maid pleads for her virtue and/or clothing. Shepherd lad is complete gentleman, escorts her home with clothing and virtue intact. Fair maid demands to know what she has to do to get laid around here.
  • Plucky heroine’s boyfriend goes to sea, fails to return. Plucky heroine dresses in drag and goes to find him. Plucky heroine discovers boyfriend happily married to someone else. Plucky heroine shoots his head right off.
  • Do Not Stop By The Local Weaver’s House, You Will Get So Pregnant, Like, Super Pregnant, I’m Not Kidding, This Has Been A Public Service Announcement.
  • Wealthy farmwife habitually searches her maidservants’ dorm for SIGNS OF MEN out of concern for their virtue. Maids less concerned for their virtue are having None Of It. Maids hide scarecrow in dorm, farm mistakes scarecrow for prowler, farmwife decapitates scarecrow. Farmwife believes herself a murderer. Maids now permitted to do as they please, virtue-wise. 
  • Idiot son sent to market to sell cow. Scheming lass seduces idiot son out of cow, pants, and even shoes.
  • Dad returns from business trip to find daughter Super Pregnant, demands to meet the man responsible. Dad takes one look at man responsible and tells daughter “okay, you’re off the hook, I would have banged him too.”
  • Handsome stranger bribes fair maid to leave town with him. Fair maid rejects various bribes until handsome stranger flat-out offers her money, which she accepts. Handsome stranger turns out to be, to no one’s great surprise, the actual devil. Fair maid regrets her life choices.
  • Gallant knight goes forth to slay dragon. Dragon eats knight, but has indigestion.

ETA: If anyone has been reblogging this and wants to know what the songs are, here is the list! Or if you’re too lazy to click things, The Devil Uisge Beatha + Shepherd Lad + Billy Taylor + Tae The Weaver’s Gin Ye Go + The Straw Man + Cow Song + Willie Winsbury + The Devil’s Courtship + Sir Eglamore

“The Office” Facts & Trivia
  • During the first season of the show, NBC seriously considered cancelling the show because other shows like Wife Swap were outdoing The Office’s ratings, but after Steve Carell’s “The 40-Year-Old Virgin,” the show made a breakout. 
  • Rainn Wilson, who played Dwight Schrute, originally auditioned for the role of Michael Scott. 
  • Originally, the TV show Parks & Recreation was supposed to be a spin-off show with Rashida Jones (who played Karen in The Office), but the spin-off idea was scrapped. 
  • The Office was originally supposed to air on FX or HBO before it landed on NBC with a wider audience. 
  • The episode “The Farm” in The Office’s final season was supposed to be a backdoor pilot for a new spin-off TV show starring Rainn Wilson (Dwight Schrute). However, NBC passed on The Farm and the episode was simply another one in a very long final season. 
  • Jenna Fischer (Pam) and Angela Kinsey (Angela) are best friends in real life. 
  • John Krasinski (Jim) and BJ Novak (Ryan Howard) went to high school together. 
  • Some of the writers of the show actually acted in the show. Mindy Kaling (Kelly), Paul Lieberstein (Toby), and BJ Novak (Ryan) were among them. 
  • Steve Carell almost missed out on being Michael Scott because he was working in another NBC sitcom titled “Come to Papa.” 
  • The Officer’s producers originally wanted to make Jim and Pam’s relationship an interracial love story. 
  • Oscar Nunez being gay was unplanned. He would not have been gay if not for a pink shirt he wore because of the wardrobe staff. 
  • When the show was still airing, tons of people came up to Jenna Fischer (Pam) and told her they were disappointed with Pam’s “strong willed personality and assertiveness.” 
  • John Krasinski (Jim) shot the videos of Scranton in the opening credits and theme song of the show. 
  • The opening credits of The Office revealed the real Penn Paper Building on Mifflin Avenue in Scranton.
  • The show’s cast often surfed the Internet in between takes. 
  • Four characters had the same name as the actors who played them - Angela Kinsey, Oscar Nunez, Phyllis Smith and Creed Bratton. 
  • The character Ryan Howard got his last name from a popular athlete. 
  • Brian Baumgartner (Kevin) and Ed Helms (Andy) were batch mates together in a school in Georgia.  
  • Poor Richard’s Pub is actually a pub in Scranton. 
  • The opening credits of The Office revealed a section of the Los Angeles Municipal Code. 
  • Steve Carell was never a fan of the British version of the show. 
  • Steve Carell placed a British flag on his desk in the show to honor the British version, although he didn’t even have a desire to watch it. 
  • Jenna Fischer kept her character Pam’s engagement ring in the series. 
  • The value of Pam’s engagement ring was around $5,000. 
  • The warehouse used in the basketball episode was really just below the actual office. 
  • Dunder Mifflin is now recognized by the Chamber of Commerce. 
  • Paul Giamatti was NBC’s first choice for the role of Michael Scott; however, Paul turned down the role. 
  • Before his audition, Steve Carell had only seen 5 minutes of the British version of The Office. 
  • Seth Rogan auditioned for the role of Dwight Schrute. 
  • Angela Kinsey originally auditioned for the role of Pam. 
  • Kate Flannery (Meredith) originally auditioned for the role of Jan. 
  • Phyllis Smith, who played Phyllis, was originally the casting director for the show, but producers loved her so much, they created a role for her. 
  • Oscar Nunez didn’t think the show would be a hit, so he kept his jobs as a server and babysitter after he got the role. 
  • Jenna Fischer’s real-life pregnancy was not an issue for writers because they were already planning a Pam-Jim pregnancy. 
  • Dwight Schrute was supposed to leave the show after the ninth season and have his own spin-off show titled “The Farm.” 
  • In the episode “The Launch Party,” John Krasinski accidentally signs Meredith’s pelvic cast with his name and not Jim’s name.
  • In the episode “A Benihana Christmas,” Michael, Andy, and Jim dine at the exact same Benihana restaurant that Carell’s character goes to in “The 40-Year-Old Virgin.”
  • Before the show, most of the show’s writers had never had a writing job before. 
  • Mindy’s roommate made an appearance in season two of the show, playing Brenda Matlowe, an executive from Dunder Mifflin corporate who came to evaluate Michael’s “leadership training exercise” in season two’s “Booze Cruise” episode. 
  • Before B.J. Novak was hired on the show, he was working as Ashton Kutcher’s lead accomplice on MTV’s Punk’d in 2003. 

@windcalling - here’s the list of songs I was referencing! You’re about to learn which artists are my favorite.


Posted the saddest deleted scene The Office ever made to our instagram account. T_T


Until “Booze Cruise”[…], Jenna had felt free to do what her character was doing: pretend Jim was nothing more than a friend.

And until then, she says, “my work day was great. This girl lived inside of me who was just kind of flirty with Jim and having fun. Since then, the girl who lives inside of me has a deep longing and heartache for this man she can’t quite manage to be with.”

After shooting that episode, says John, “Jenna asked me, `Is THIS what YOU’VE been living with all along?’ And I told her, `Yeah! How does it feel?!’”

I should be answering the headcanon requests in my inbox but instead here I am, making up Jon + dragon headcanons with @mstoker

  • Imagine the opening shot of GOT. Majestic music…a shot of a wing…and then we see a dragon, being ridden by…Jon. The majestic music swells. Jon is finally on a dragon. Seconds later, Jon vomits. He’s airsick. 
  • Jon, getting off a dragon: “Leave me here on the floor. Just fucking leave me. Getting stabbed was a better experience.” 
    • Jon is just laying on the floor and everyone’s just like “jon pls you have to fight the white walkers” and he just groans. 
    • “Just. Drag me around the floor. Everyone already drags me just do it.” (10/10 real dialogue)
  • Dany: “My children…they understand high valyrian.” 
    • Jon: “Well. That’s…cool?” 
    • He also probably doesn’t get the whole “the dragons are her kids” thing he hears that and just constantly shares A Look with Dadvos. 
  • Jon tries to take Ghost with him because he wants the company and after 10 minutes and a scratch on his arm Ghost is clinging onto Viserion’s tail and is howling. When they get off Jon is almost positive Ghost glares at him, and he’d say he was exaggerating except for the fact that Ghost legitimately ignores him the entire day. 
  • Rhaegal ignores Jon. Jon loves him for it. 
  • Viserion takes a shine to Jon and follows him around all the time and Jon just sighs because he follows him around literally everywhere. Jon tried to pee and Viserion just popped up screeching and Jon almost cried.   
    • Bran: “Jon, I am the Three Eyed Raven now. I see all, I have to tell you about your parenta-”
    • Jon: “That’s great good to see you too can you tell me how I get this dragon to stop following me?” 
  • Bran wargs into a dragon and Jon doesn’t know how to feel about the fact that he’s currently riding a dragon who is also his brother but honestly this is like, the third weirdest thing in his life so he rolls with it and just resolves to go on a booze cruise and finally take a nap when this is all over. 

Another deleted scene from ep220 “Drug Testing” with Jim under the jinx. There was a little bit of a subplot with Jim and Brenda Something-from-corporate who we very briefly met on the booze cruise. He called to ask Brenda out when he was stuck in the annex all day in The Carpet. Then Jim left early for a date in Take Your Daughter To Work Day, though he doesn’t say who the date was with, the clues point to Brenda. We’re gonna guess Brenda didn’t call back…

bobs burgers sentence starters.

“ no one sheds like this family, it’s like a bunch of chewbaccas. ”
“ i hope they’re using protection because i am not taking care of that baby. ”
“ this is what it sounds like when they have sex in the room next to mine. ”
“ do you think cows should be ground up for food? ”
“ frowny face? all I’ve been is super nice to you and this is the thanks i get? ”
“ i loved you, i loved you like a horse, which is my favorite animal. ”
“ so you’re not going to get revenge today? ”
“ then i won’t bring your credit card… which i cut into a ninja star! ”
“ word of advice: don’t tell them what you’re in for. ”
“ when you say that, i feel like you’re trying to hurt my feelings. ”
“ great. why don’t you learn something and become a lawyer. ”
“ i will punch you. again, and again, and again, and again, and again— ”
“ let’s release the lobster from whence it came! the supermarket! ”
“ i just can’t stop banging things down here, the acoustics are great. ”
“ wait, so, you you didn’t just throw a candy bar in the pool? ”
“ i did a booze cruise through your living room! ”
“ you’re supposed to love each other, not kill each other! ”
“ if you think about it any box could have vibrators in it. ”
“ we’re adrenaline junkies. we like our rides pure and uncut. ”
“ on the plus side, there doesn’t seem to be any damage to the other car. ”
“ for all we know, that was probably already there, right? ”
“ because stress is making my hair fall out! look at me! ”
“ puberty, puberty, puberty. that’s all i hear when you guys talk! ”
“ fine! i don’t wanna play your dumb little game anyway. ”
“ i’m gonna learn about sex from television, so i don’t need that from you either! ”
“ look through the tube, see some boob! show some green, see some peen! ”
“ we’ll have to cut down on expenses. what can we live without? ”
“  i made it rain shrimp! what did youever do? ”
“ your ass is grass and I’m gonna mow it. ”
“ i just wanna slap his / her hideous, beautiful face! ”
“ i’m no hero. i put my bra on one boob at a time like everyone else. ”
“  i was going to punch you, but i’m holding wine. ”
“ so i’m guessing you guys are not the top frat on campus. ”