books that won't happen but should

anonymous asked:

Hey! How do I tell if I'm ftm trans and not just a tomboy? Sometimes I seriously consider going on T or changing myself, but I really want biological kids so I won't, but I don't know how to get rid of these feelings.

Hey back! ;P I couldn’t possibly answer this question briefly, but it just so happens I wrote a book to help people figure out the answers to questions like these! The first chapter should help you figure out your identity. The second chapter should help you explore whether different aspects of physical transition are right for you. I think it might also be helpful for you to have access to the information in there, as you will learn that going on T does not mean you cannot have biological kids. (For example you could freeze your eggs before starting hormones and/or there are trans men who go off of hormones for a period of time later in life so that they can carry and give birth to a child.) I hope you will find that you don’t have to get rid of any feelings at all, but that those feelings will help guide you to find what path is right for you. Happy gender quest!

anonymous asked:

Hello. Some friends and I were going to co-write a book together & I was reluctant cause I knew there would be issues: 1&2 are passive, 3 emotionally volatile and throws tantrums over nothing, and 4 has no patience. In short, I was thrown out the project because of an irrelevant issue that doesn't even concern me, I was just a good outlet, then asked back. I don't feel like I can though bcs even with an insincere apology, how can I be assured the same thing won't happen again? What should I do?

Short answer? You can’t be sure your working relationship with these other writers will pan out. And that’s okay. 

Co-authorship can be hard to negotiate among friends, especially if these friends are not disciplined writers. It is often difficult to keep work and friendship separate. If you or your friends lack commitment and discipline, the project is doomed. 

It sounds like you’ve got some anger directed toward these other writers regarding this project. Since they’re your friends, I recommend that you talk to them and work on repairing your friendships before you commit to the project. After you’ve come to some resolution in your personal life, then, if you still want to, you can move forward in working with them.

Some unsolicited advice: as you repair your relationships, be sure to imagine your friends complexly (as people rather than actions or emotions, for example). I’m sure you’re aware that your friends are more than just passive and emotionally volatile and lacking patience. The urge to oversimplify others, especially when we are angry with them, can muddle our perspective.

Friends are respectful, open to understanding, and practice active listening. It may be true that they forgot these things when they asked you to leave the project before, but that doesn’t mean you’ve forgotten. I know you’re upset now. Trust me, being open with your friends can go a long way in repairing the damage done to your relationships. 

If you decide to continue work on the project, be sure to establish strong, open lines of communication among your co-authors. Work on creating timelines or other thresholds of achievement. Be open to others’ ideas and share your own. Be honest about your commitment to the project and try not to hold grudges if others are not as disciplined. Remember, the goal is to complete the project with your relationships intact, but the relationships are more important than the project itself. If things get rough again, put your friendships first. 

Other advice from around the Tumblr writing community on collaborating:

Thank you for your question, and I hope my rambling was helpful to you. Best of luck!

-C

Conversation about HTTYD between me and a friend
  • Me: *geek rant*...and I was re-reading book 11 the other day and it's so epic, you really should pick up where you left off in the series.
  • Friend: I think I prefer the movies to the books. It's so much more lighthearted, and not as sad, right? The first book says all the dragons are going to die out or something. I'm glad that won't happen in the movie!
  • Me: ....
  • Me: Buddy, I've got news for you.
  • Me: not buying any more books until I finish my TBR pile
  • Me: well, only the sequels to the series that I'm already following
  • Me: this is Christmas money so I think it's okay if I spend it on books because it's extra money
  • Me: this is birthday money and people told me I should spend it on books when they gave it to me so I feel like I'm obligated to do as they wished
  • Me: I just really wanted this one or two or three other books too
  • Me: okay I really mean it this time I won't buy any other books
  • Me: *makes list of all the sequels being released in the next six months*
Gravity Falls Characters You Should Fight
  • Grunkle Stan: Absolutely fight Grunkle Stan. He's a con-man, has been in a Colombian prison, took boxing lessons as a child, and has punched the supernatural in the face on multiple occasions. You have no idea what tricks he has up his sleeve. He spent the last THIRTY YEARS building a portal to get his brother back. I want to see the carnage of this fight you're proposing. Fight the Grunkle. You'll lose.
  • Soos: He's a repairman, he has tools to hit you with, but he's made of marshmallows. You could take him in a fight, but why would you? Do you want to see him cry? You monster.
  • Wendy: This is Manly Dan's daughter. We've seen her fight a monstrous shapeshifter in the show already. Cipher says she's a pushover, but I'd take that with a grain of salt. That triangle just wants to watch you burn. Do not fight Wendy.
  • Grenda: She's a prepubescent girl. By herself, assuming you're an adult, you could probably take her. If she's tag-teaming you with Candy, however, your chances of losing grow exponentially.
  • Candy: Some say she never fights fairly. If you can see her before she strikes, she's all yours. Otherwise, you join the others buried under that mailbox in the forest.
  • Manly Dan: He punches. He looks like a biter. Be fast, and you could do it. Or you could listen to Sev'ral Times' new album with him. Your choice.
  • Mystery Twins: DO NOT FIGHT DIPPER AND MABEL. First of all, why? Mabel wants to make you sweaters and feed you plastic dinosaurs. Dipper sneezes like a kitten. Are you Gideon? They already kicked your ass while you were in a giant robot. Besides that, if they catch wind of it beforehand, you won't be just fighting them, but also whatever supernatural demon they pulled out of the book. I don't know what more you want me to say on the matter. Be friends with the Pines' kids. Or pray.
  • Bill Cipher: Summon Bill Cipher. Do the candles, the mantra, everything. Wait for him to appear. Propose a deal and extend your hand. When he goes to shake it, slap him in the face instead. You have no chance of winning, but I want to see what happens. Fight Bill. I fucking dare you.

anonymous asked:

Hello, I have read your GynoGuide and I have a follow up question. I'm 26, never had sex, and have asked my GP for the last 3 years when I've gone in if I need to go and see a gyno, and all three have told me not until I have sex (being asexual, that probably won't happen any time soon, if ever). So is this something I should I doctor shop for? or is it something I should just book in for. Sorry to bother you like this, Thanks again

You can go ahead and find one on your own. You can go through your insurance and ask around to women near you and just make the appointment yourself. I cover this quite a bit in the GynoGuide (we’re totally calling it that now, btw) and why it’s extremely important, even if you haven’t had or plan to have sex. There are hundreds of 18 year olds out there who discovered they had cancer on their first OBGYN visit who would have gone undetected if they had waited to make an appointment.