book two: nothing


Someone has gone to the trouble of publishing a new set of Famous Five books for the modern era, complete with sarcastic millennial humour and adult jokes, but keeping the original aesthetic.


I found them in Dymocks and 




Witness, for example, this Entirely Relatable Content from Five Get Gran Online:

There’s also a bunch of others my shop didn’t have:

In conclusion this is why I spent fifteen solid minutes cackling maniacally in a bookshop this week and I thought you might like to know.

I never noticed colors and clouds and stuff until you kept reminding me about them. It seems like they were never there before.
—  Johnny Cade

anonymous asked:

Lottie! Some english lit students at my university have been toying with the idea of forming a Renegade Gay Book Club, so do you have any LGBT+ standalone book recommendations that won't make for overly awkward/sad club meeting discussion?

intuiting your ‘overly awkward/sad’ to mean no one does anything to warrant an E on AO3 and I didn’t sob my heart out in bed, HERE IS WHAT I HAVE FOR YOU: 

  • Grasshopper Jungle by Andrew Smith
  • The Watchmaker of Filigree Street by Natasha Pulley
  • Dryland by Sara Jaffe
  • The Great American Whatever by Tim Federle
  • Wonders of the Invisible World by Christopher Barzak
  • Teeth by Hannah Moskowitz
  • When Everything Feels Like the Movies by Raziel Reid 
  • The Rest of Us Just Live Here by Patrick Ness
  • Fans of the Impossible Life by Kate Scelsa
  • Carry On by Rainbow Rowell 
  • Simon vs. the Homo-Sapiens Agenda by Becky Albertalli
  • A Hero at the End of the World by Erin Claiborne
  • The Darkest Part of the Forest by Holly Black
  • I’ll Give You the Sun by Jandy Nelson
  • Aristotle and Dante Discover the Secrets of the Universe by Benjamin Alire Sáenz

it’s a short list but in my defence I’m a) a sucker for a trilogy and b) a masochist

Everything Wrong With Twilight: Forever Dawn

When writing, one of the most important things that a person must do is plan out what is going to happen. Of course, for many writers, these plans are sometimes forced to change. 

For instance, in Harry Potter, Rowling originally had the entire ending chapter written out, so that she knew where the seven books were going to be heading. However, somewhere around between the fourth and fifth books, Rowling realized that she’d written an epic plot hole, which caused much of the fifth book to be writing around it, and during the final books, everything had to change from plans.

Gravity Falls originally had the Cipher wheel as nothing more than a sort of decorative thing, but when Alex Hirsh saw the work, effort, and thought that people were going to in order to decode the thing, he eventually integrated it into the finale, even if it didn’t change anything in the end.

Lord of the Rings went through so many changes that the original plot ideas are almost unrecognizable. It’s one of the reasons that when people say that Jackson was building off of some notes on the Hobbit that Tolkien had been writing out for a rewrite, it doesn’t necessarily mean that they would have found their way into the rewrite, if there ever was one.

Plans change. That’s something that all writers have to understand. When you force a story to follow your original vision, you have major, major, problems.

And that was something that Meyer ended up doing.

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Instagram post by Osceola Library • Nov 10, 2017 at 4:55pm UTC
5 Likes, 1 Comments - Osceola Library (@osceolalibrary) on Instagram: “Someone has big plans for her 15th birthday... #dundundun #worlddomination #kuchikopiattheready…”

“Someone has big plans for her 15th birthday…” O_O

Happy Book Face Friday! We got quite a few looks while getting this shot this week. #weregretnothing

FOLLOW US ON INSTAGRAM for a new Book Face every week! (As well as other puns, aesthetic photos, book quotes, and shenanigans.) 

honestly the most bomb teacher I’ve ever had was in 7th grade my English teacher was this super cool dude with a whole lot of degrees and an amazing accent and he’d hold weekly spelling bees with a pizza party for the winners and he’d give out fountain pens and lychee jelly cups and he had a shelf of books at the back of the classroom that we’d do book reports on and whoever did the best book report got to keep the book and at the end of the year we watched Studio Ghibli films for like a week and he motivated everyone to write from their heart and got the class published in a book of essays and was so cool and inspiring and one of the best teachers I’ve ever had

Drabbles as always.


The age of technology sweeps everyone into a frenzied storm.

For most, the growing advancement of these devices mean power – everything is accessible now, if you know how to use your gadgets well. Information can be seen and retrieved with just a single push of a button, communication is no longer exclusive to pen and paper, and games are accessible anywhere at anytime. It is absolutely overwhelming!

However, for Uzumaki Naruto, this availability of anything at anytime means finally having a jumpstart on romance. And not just his love-life, oh no. His friends too! Which is why, on a clear Saturday morning, the blond Uzumaki is demanding for Neji’s phone and insisting on having a look-see.

Neji, warily, gives the phone to the enthusiastic boy and watches as Naruto sweeps the contents with a furrowed brow. After seeing most of what is stored in the device, Naruto huffs and quickly starts downloading something in there. Once done, he proudly shows it to Neji, who assesses the newest application with a glare.

“Cupid Match?” Neji’s lips thin. “Naruto, what is this?”

“A dating application,” Naruto answers easily. “See, what’cha need to do is that you fill out this form right here, and then theyy match ya up with someone!”

He grins, shoves the phone to Neji to make him try it. But the Hyuuga is stubborn; his eyes continue to glare at the glowing pink icon on his phone. Finally, he shakes his head.

“This is a waste of my time.”

But Naruto is stubborn is his own way too.

“Just try it, Neji! What’s the harm, anyways?”

Neji scowls, once again examines the application’s icon, then at the beaming Naruto. Finally, he sighs.

“Fine,” he grumbles, fingers flying as he answers all the questions on the form. “Done. What should I do next?”

Naruto jumps excitedly.

“Click on MATCH and wait for the results!”

Neji does as told, and they wait in tensed silence as the application loads up its results. Naruto is still fidgeting excitedly, head craned to better see the phone’s screen, whereas Neji sits patiently.

Finally, the phone makes a shrill tone, and the results page opens up. The two take a gander at what is written, their eyes growing wide as they realize who the application just paired Neji up with.

“Tenten?!” Naruto screeches, arms flailing. “She has an account in this too?!” His grin widens, and he elbows Neji jokingly. “But HA! I knew it! I’ve always shipped you guys together and–”

“This is pointless.” Neji scoffs, pockets his phone. “That application is faulty, Naruto.”

The Hyuuga leaves before Naruto can even squeak out a protest.


Tenten frowns. Neji gives her a one-armed shrug.


“Yes. Apparently, this thing thinks that you and I are a good match.”

Tenten hums; Neji crosses his arms.

“Well, we are a good team, aren’t we?”

“Yes, we are.”

She stretches; he closes his eyes.

“And we do spend a lot of time with each other…”


She awkwardly shuffles in her seat. He looks away.



She scratches the back of her head. He is still looking away.

“You… uhh… wanna try it? Dating and stuff?”

“…If you want.”

She bites her lips. His eyes slowly turn to her.

“I kind of do. And you?”

“That does sound appealing.”

She giggles softly. His shoulders relax slightly.

“So. We’re dating?”

“It seems we are.”

They shake their hands on it.


(From the distance, Naruto almost tears his hair off because GOD DAMN THESE TWO! So unromantic! But hey, what can you get from Neji and Tenten anyway?)

So, I think it’s been clear that I’m obsessed with the @welcometonightvalebook lately, and I’m going to try to explain why without any spoilers.

On the surface, perusing the back cover and listening to the sample chapter available on the Night Vale website, it sounds like a foray into the weirdness surrounding Night Vale, especially The Man in the Tan Jacket, and, on the surface, it is.  And that would probably honestly be enough for me; I enjoy the “uncanny valley” horror and suspense of Welcome to Night Vale and always find the quips humorous.  But I soon discovered that what lies on the surface is not actually the core of the novel.

Instead, it’s a story about a single-parent household and what sort of effect that has on both the parent and the child.   It’s about the parental fear of how, absent of one parent, the child’s growth could be seen as a direct reflection of the remaining parent’s ability.   It’s about the sacrifices the parent makes and how much the child comes to be the center of the parent’s world.   It’s about the resentment that can form from parent-to-child, regardless of the noblest intentions.   It’s about facing that resentment, and realizing judging yourself by your child’s achievement puts undue pressure on the child.

It’s about the childhood fear that, absent of one parent, you are somehow incomplete, and therefore will not be able to understand yourself until you understand both your parents.  It’s about the ways you try to find yourself as more than just a reflection of your one, remaining parent.  It’s about the resentment that can form from child-to-parent, regardless of how much you love and need your parent.  It’s that very dependence that causes the resentment, along with the feeling that you are the reason the other parent is gone, and the only way to deal with that is to blame the one remaining parent.  It’s about facing that resentment, and realizing that ultimately you are your own person, shaped by your parent but ultimately able to find yourself no matter how many parents you have.

And it’s also about being 19 - technically an adult, but still treated like a child by most people older than you.  It’s about realizing you know more than you do, and realizing you know so much less.  It’s about realizing that no one can force you to grow up; there are supposed adults just as young as you, but your knowledge and confidence in yourself doesn’t make you older either.  It’s about the growth that only comes when you abandon safety.  It’s about learning who you really are by stepping away, however briefly, from what you think you are, just to make sure you can confirm everything you’ve ever thought.  It’s about letting in the outside world and how much that sucks, but how ultimately necessary it is.

Funny jokes, weird happenings, and men in tan jackets aside, I think everyone needs to read this book because of what it says about living.  Fink and Cranor have crafted a story with incredibly real characters that are often too close to home - and by that I mean they’re as close as they should be.  All space/time-bending, angels, and monsters aside, this novel is very real.  And as I read it, I helped realize my own reality again.  I looked at my own scars and my own triumphs.  And I felt good.

I’m an English teacher.  I have a masters degree in the stuff, so I’ve read a book or two.  And nothing has spoken to me the way this book does.  I hope it speaks to you too.

But, you know, in the “heartfelt feelings” sort of way.  If the book actually starts talking, RUN.

hey, lemme talk at you about the fire nation royal family and lightning for a sec please, because this family is so totally heartbreaking and i’ve seen a lot of people talk about the fire sibs and the abuse they suffered but i haven’t seen anyone touch on this stuff specifically.

(now with pretty pictures! yay)

alright, let’s start with azula.

(up yours, buddy.)

azula’s fourteen at the end of tla and many, many times throughout the series we see her ready to kill. not maim, not burn, but kill. she is a lightningbender and that’s a highly lethal technique in and of itself, but azula is also all about precision. precision lightning, coupled with deadly intent, is an awful thing to expect out of a fourteen-year-old girl but it also allowed her to almost murder her sixteen-year-old brother long at the end of book one, almost murder her uncle to get away from an angry mob partway through book two, and succeed in killing the twelve-year-old avatar at the end of book two.

(‘cause nothing tells your brother “i love you” like a lightning bolt to the face.)

that all happened in less than a year, by the way, and remember that the avatar is, as far as the lore goes, basically a god… or as close to one as the avatar universe gets, anyhow. fourteen-year-old living weapon azula kills a veritable god.

and then comes book three, and by then, aforementioned brother learns to redirect lightning and teaches the avatar to do it and calls his old man on so much shit that the sap of preaching love and kindness is overwhelmed by the satisfaction and pride of zuko finally getting his act together after 2.5 books.

(i think is is yours, dad.)

he says he’s gonna go teach the avatar because it’s aang’s destiny to take down the fire lord, not his, and ozai shoots lightning at him and he redirects it and leaves. this is important. remember that; it comes back later.

the point for now, though, is that zuko called ozai on the abuse he suffered as a child and ozai, unaware of the fact that he now knows how to redirect lighting, responds by trying to kill him. great. and it blows up in the fire lord’s face (literally) and he gets knocked back against the wall.

if zuko had thought his destiny was to take down his father, he’d have done so there. just let that sink in for a moment. zuko’s redirected bolt was so close to hitting ozai that it knocked. him. back against the wall. the prince knows how to work with other people’s lightning and he had to learn it because lightningbenders are trying to kill him.

and then the series finale rolls around and aang faces off against ozai and zuko against azula, and they do their respective things and during the last agni kai, zuko trips azula and goads her into shooting lightning so he can redirect it.

(come at me, bro.)

think about that. zuko just provoked one of the deadliest firebenders on the face of the earth into shooting lightning at him, and of course he expected to be able to send it back and come out unscathed like he did with their dad, but consider the implications of the fact that he provokes azula. he taunts her. he wants her to shoot at him. consider how determined and fierce he looks and was when confronting her. consider how grim he looks… and then he gets her to give him lethal ammunition like lightning? yeah. that’s right.

zuko went into that agni kai fully ready to win it by killing his sister. he’s so determined and he’s made so many hard decisions that he can and will do whatever needs to be done… and then azula fakes him out and he takes the proverbial bullet for katara, who finishes the duel without ever landing a single blow while zuko lies dying on the floor.

(that’s normal. he’s probably fine.)

that last agni kai, for all intents and purposes, was intended to be a duel to the death.

and, hey, speaking of  which…

(boom boom boom dancin’ thru the skies!)

while zuko and azula are fighting each other, ozai and aang both go into their final battle with that deadly intent as well, and at one point, ozai shoots lightning at aang, who catches it to redirect.

and ozai has this very sudden and very hard-hitting realization of exactly who it was who taught him that, and gee, isn’t this like that day in the underground bunker, and he expects aang to kill him with it because the kid learned from his son. zuko had the determination to kill if it’s necessary, and aang… well, he doesn’t, but ozai doesn’t know that. he assumes aang will kill him because he studied under his son, and that’s what the guy would do in the avatar’s place. the thought that aang would send it skyward, away from his opponent, doesn’t even cross the fire lord’s mind until it’s already happened.

(well damn, son’s friend, that can’t be good for my health.)

so basically, everyone expects someone to die when a firebender shoots lightning, and the royal family has two prominent lightningbenders, both of whom attempted to kill their own family member with it, and that, in turn, prompted said family member to not only learn to kill them with their own technique, but to teach it to his student, the avatar, too.

that’s pretty dark.

k, so like I love that Agents of SHIELD is basically Skye’s superhero origin story. That’s cool. Love Skye. Love superpowers. Love origin stories. 


There’s like one huuuuge problem I have with this.






Like, I could let Coulson and May slip by, as they’re not like actually parents, just filling the parent-sized hole in her heart, but YOU CAN’T HAVE BOTH. NOT COOL. WHAT WOULD BATMAN SAY??

“Un giorno ci incroceremo in un caffè o in metropolitana. Cercheremo di non riconoscerci o di fingere di non vederci, ci gireremo svelti dall’altra parte. Saremo imbarazzati per ciò che è diventato il nostro “noi”, per quello che ne è rimasto. Niente… Due estranei uniti da un passato immaginario…

[ D. Glattauer]


“Is that hers?” Dean asked in shock. “And that too?”

Sam just nodded silently. It was his idea to google you, for fun. Neither of them expected what they found.

You had your own secrets. Since you were a little girl you enjoyed painting with your mother and later you started writing as well. It took you a lot of time and people to realize that you were good at what you’re doing. That’s when you started selling your paintings.


“Hola, boys!” you greeted your favorite brothers after comming home from San Diego comic con.

“Hall of hell? Blue fingerprint?” Sam asked and your eyes widened. “Why didn’t you tell us that you’re pretty famous in some circles?”

You were quiet, not knowing what to say. 

“Well where did you think that I got money for food and modern things?” you finally spoke.

“Poker? You’re good at that too!” Dean exclaimed.

“Don’t be mad at me, please? It’s not a big deal, I sold a few paintings and wrote a book or two. It’s nothing.” you begged.

“We’re not mad, more like amazed.” Sam chuckled and pulled you into a hug.

“And really proud of you, kiddo.” Dean added, joining the hug.

x / requested