bone saws


Guys, this video is funny as hell. You just have to watch the crew dancing. At first it’s Star Wars, however it’s Star Trek strikes back, it’s pretty funny.


Growing up, Brennan’s education was always enhanced at home. Her father’s occupation as a science teacher allowed her the opportunity to continue learning outside of traditional school hours. Her curiosity and insatiable thirst for knowledge were better able to be nurtured, given her situation. She had an advantage, for sure. In the past, Booth harbored concerns about his own child’s education. He was unable to provide Parker any such supplemental enrichment- at least not as it pertained to science. But Booth also knew that Brennan (his “partner” at the time) and Max could potentially aid in that department. And they did just that. Nowadays, Booth and Brennan still take that approach with their kids’ education. Learning does not come to a halt when the bell rings. Parker, Christine (and presumably little Hank) are consistently engaged in learning. Whether it’s how to play peek-a-boo, the periodic table of elements, the bone song (the REAL one), reading, riding a bike, or standing up to a bully (or a monster), their education is supplemented at home. It’s quite evident that these children immensely enjoy expanding their minds and skill sets (I assume Christine will eventually take to riding a bike just fine). And both Booth and Brennan are able to teach their children the most valuable of lessons- both academic and life. The two of them have so much knowledge to pass down.  And since their varying strengths and areas of expertise complement each other, their kids will undoubtedly be incredibly well-rounded. Whether they become writers, scientists, hockey players, or car salespeople, they will have had a solid educational and emotional foundation. 

Obviously, Booth isn’t always interested in science and logistics. He wanted Christine to learn to ride a bike without making it into a physics lesson. It does not mean he has any sort of contempt for science. Or that he doesn’t possess the utmost respect for his wife’s intelligence and her team’s expertise. And it certainly doesn’t imply that he does not want his children to reach their full intellectual potential. If you recall the end of 11x16, Booth would be the proudest father in the world if Parker turned out like Brennan. He understands how important science is. After all, it is absolutely vital to his job. There is a reason he wanted to work with Brennan after their first case together. There is a reason their solve rate is unparalleled.  And while he himself may not want to infuse a teachable moment into every facet of his home life, he can appreciate Brennan’s round-the-clock devotion to science and mathematics- and really, learning in general. It’s a part of her. And to be honest, it’s part of why he fell in love with her. He loves her mind just as much as any other component of her.  He read one of Brennan’s “thick” science books when she was on the run for three months. Did he enjoy it? Clearly not. But it made him feel closer to her. And there have been a number of instances where it is apparent some of Brennan’s scientific knowledge and desire to learn has rubbed off on him. Remember when he scored in the 97th percentile? He was going to try for 99% the next year. “You turned me into a monster.” Similarly, Brennan isn’t always concerned with the intangible. How many times has she dismissed Booth’s faith or his gut feelings? But there are also occasions during which she notes their tremendous value. “There’s a time, and a place.” Booth and Brennan will occasionally disagree on each other’s teaching methods and priorities. And because they are famously stubborn at times, the two of them may even get a bit competitive over the best way to impart their wisdom (i.e., the end of 12x06). That’s the heat though. They have been this way since the beginning. At the end of the day, they will inevitably come together and find a compromise. They will understand from where the other is coming. That’s what they have always done. “Mass graves for me, and a beach with liquor for you.” Booth has made it clear he wants his kids to grow up to be more like Brennan. And Brennan wants her kids to grow up to be like Booth. Those children will be obviously be the best of both parents. Ultimately, the most important thing is that Parker, Christine, and Hank have every opportunity to learn, grow, and succeed. And that they have a better childhood than Booth and Brennan. And most importantly, that they are happy, healthy, bright, and loved. 

Also…rainbows  ❤ 🌈 ❤

Equipment of Zendikar in D&D, Part 1

Since Plane Shift: Zendikar was released I’ve been planning to run a D&D campaign in the setting. As equipment is really an iconic feature of both Zendikar blocks, I thought I’d go about turning some equipment cards into items, either mundane or magical, for characters to use when playing a campaign set in Zendikar.

Bone Saw - Simple melee weapon
1d8 Slashing Damage, Two-handed

For Oath of the Gatewatch’s Bone Saw, I based the damage, and the need to wield it two-handed on the apparent size of the item. As such, i presented it as an item similar to the longsword, but without the versatile rule, representing the fact that the Bone Saw isn’t intentionally made for combat, and is therefore a little more unwieldy to use as a weapon than the longsword. To purchase in-game, the Bone Saw would cost around 10gp, and weigh 4lb.

Captain’s Claws
Magic Item - Rare
These gauntlets grant the wearer +1 to their unarmed attack and damage and damage rolls, and advantage on all acrobatics or athletics checks based around climbing. Any friendly creatures that see this character succeed an acrobatics or athletics challenge based around climbing may gain advantage on their own acrobatics or athletics checks based around climbing.

Also from Oath of the Gatewatch, Captain’s Claws are treated as a rare magic item. To mirror the +1/+0 it grants to a creature it is attached to, my rendition of Captain’s Claws acts as a +1 Weapon, but specifically for unarmed attacks. To represent the summoning of allies, I decided it could in game-terms mean that the wielder can help their allies their allies catch up to them, essentially “Entering the battlefield” attacking with their leader.

Explorer’s Scope
Objects viewed through this spyglass are magnified to twice their size.
Perception checks relying on sight may be made using this spyglass, granting the user advantage.

From the original Zendikar set, I decided that explorer’s scope would be treated as very similar to a standard spyglass found in the Player’s Handbook, but with the added bonus to Perception checks, representing the item as a must-have part of any Zendikar explorer’s toolkit, as the rules of the actual card suggest.

Ogre’s Cleaver
2d8 Slashing damage, Heavy, Reach, Two-handed

In Zendikar and the many other settings of Dungeons and Dragons, Ogres are considerably bigger than the majority of humanoids, that being the reson behind this weapon having the Heavy, Reach, and Two-handed rules. While the same limitations of heavy don’t apply to the card itself, it seems plausible that a goblin would have a lot of trouble using such a large weapon. The weapon’s stats are similar to the standard Greatsword found in the Player’s Handbook, but with slightly raised damage and extended range, representing the weapon’s size and brutal crafting (I mean just look at the thing!). 2D8 does seem like a serious amount of damage for a non-magical weapon to deal, and makes an appropriate comparrison to the effect that giving a creature +5/+0 can have in a game of Magic. This weapon would likely weigh around 10lb, and cost over 50gp, perhaps being sold for considerably more than that if the players are trying to barter with the tyrannical ogre Kazuul or any of his minions.

Pathway Arrows
Magic Item - Uncommon
You gain a +1 bonus to attack and damage rolls made with these arrows. An eldrazi or construct hit by a pathway arrow must make a DC11 Wisdom challenge. On a failed save, the target gains the Stunned condition until the beginning of the wielder’s next turn.

For a weapon that taps colourless creatures in the game, the main design goal of Pathway Arrows as a magic item was to create a similar effect in D&D’s own combat system. Going with stunned, the target is quite heavily locked down for a turn in combat, just as tapping a creature before it can be declared as an attacker in Magic stops that creature from doing anything in the ensuing combat. While stunned presents further disadvantages in combat, this is balanced by the target’s ability to make a save to prevent it from suffering the condition. In game, pathway arrows can be presented in a quiver of five, sold for the normal costs of an Uncommon Magic Item presented in the Dungeon Master’s Guide.

I’m planning on designing D&D rules for the majority of Zendikar’s equipment, if you have any feedback or any card you would like to see in the next post, please let me know!

So do we summon Satan?

I am playing a 5e campaign with an online group, and we’re just starting up our second session. In the last session we just finished killing a grizzly bear and were about to search the den. We have 4 players, a Paladin (me), a Monk, a Ranger, and a Rogue. The Monk and Ranger go to investigate first, and both roll 6’s before bonuses.

Ranger: Okay, apparently I see jack. Does anyone else want to try?

Monk (OoC): So if one more person rolls a 6, do we summon Satan?

DM: Mmm, we’ll see. Anyone else?

Me: Suuuure. [Paladin] goes into the den to investigate the bones they saw earlier. (also rolls a 6)

The rest of the group starts laughing as I’m yelling out of character, “We summon the deviiiiil! Or Cthulhu!” (Luckily, the DM did not summon Satan on us.)