bodyke

Island of Misfit Delinquents Part 2

A/N: O wants to go to the zoo, Murphy advocates against Body Shaming, Jasper is zebra prejudice, and the gang runs into some trouble….. So like just any other typical day

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The Island of Misfit Delinquents

5:15 am

Blake 2: *added Nathan Miller + JJ Goggles + Smol Son Monty to the group chat*

Blake 2: Which one of you sons of bitches is up for road trip to the Polis Zoo

Blake 1: I’ll gladly offer up my car to drive you back to where you belong among the wild beasts

Blake 2: KMGRKJFNBIFLK I’M TRIGGERED

Nathan Miller: I just spent the past three hours trying to get this lanky drunk dude in a neon pink spandex body suit and feather boa who was screaming obscenities at me home so count me as a no

King Azgeda: Wait I thought you were working last night. I didn’t know you were hanging out with Jasper

JJ Goggles: Don’t roast me like this 

Smol Son Monty: Yeah roast anything else about him but his body suit

Smol Son Monty: He’s very insecure about his figure

Murph-Man: WHO’S BODY SHAMING JAS I WILL FIGHT THEM

Commander Clarke: John Murphy- the hero I never knew our group needed

Caw Caw Little Birdy: Such a cliched anti-hero, that John Murphy

Caw Caw Little Birdy: BUT ALSO SAME BECAUSE I WILL FIGHT ANYONE WHO OFFENDS JASPER IN THE SLIGHTEST HOLD MY EARRINGS 

Blake 1: What a power couple

Blake 2: But for real lets go to the zoo today. Roan said he’d buy me a churro. Or twelve

King Azgeda: You’re definitely not having 12 churros 

Blake 2: You’re not my boyfriend anymore

King Azgeda: You’re definitely not having 12 churros CAUSE I WAS GOING TO BUY YOU 13 CHURROS

Commander Clarke: Nice save 


JONTAVIA GROUP CHAT

6:52

JJ Goggles: Hey O

Blake 2: Hey J

JJ Goggles: How would you feel about Monty and I sneaking alcohol into the zoo?

Smol Son Monty: HYPOTHETICALLY sneaking in alcohol

Blake 2: I’d say HYPOTHETICALLY maybe

JJ Goggles: I’ve always wanted to get drunk at the zoo and naked fight the zebras

Blake 2: OH MY SHIT

Blake 2: PLEASE

Blake 2: But what do you have against the zebras, Jas?

JJ Goggles: They’ve got SO many stripes. Like pick a single color you over-hyped up multi-colored horse fuckers

Blake 2: ?

Smol Son Monty: Don’t mind him. He’s already started pre-gaming


The Island of Misfit Delinquents

7:30 am

Caw Caw Little Birdy: For whoever is riding in my car to the zoo, your father and I are here outside Casa Blake

Murph-Man: Yes, it is I, your father. And you are all disappointments and the reason I drink

Commander Clarke: Awww it’s like I’m actually talking to my real parents

Blake 1: BABE OMG

Commander Clarke: Wow forgot to compartmentalize my feelings there for a second #wildin

Blake 2: Don’t worry, Clarkey. I got fruit snacks and juice pouches to help numb the pain 

Commander Clarke: Scooby-Doo ones?

Blake 2: Are there any other kind of fruit snacks?

Caw Caw Little Birdy: Like jinkies gang! Get in the Mystery Machine or Murphy’s pasty ass is the only one going to the zoo


Blake 1 + Commander Clarke

8:09 am

Blake 1: Remind me again why we decided to split up the cars into boys and girls?

Commander Clarke: Cause Raven, O and I aren’t about to spend the next two hours listening to you guys bitch about our music

Blake 1: You bitch about Taylor Swift one time….

Commander Clarke: I can assure you we will never forget

Commander Clarke: *I-Knew-Bellamy-Was-Trouble.vid*


King Azgeda created a new chat

9:54 am

King Azgeda: *named the chat Beastie Boys*

Murph-Man: I can’t believe youre subjectifying me to this 1987 swill 

King Azgeda: Appreciate the classics

Blake 1: NO SLEEP TILL

Blake 1: *guitar solo from the gods*

Blake 1: B R O O K L Y N

King Azgeda: FOOT ON THE PEDAL NEVER EVER FALSE METAL ENGINE RUNNING HOTTER THEN A BOILING KETTLE 

Smol Son Monty: Ya’ll sleeping on Boyz To Men

JJ Goggles: I got you little homie 


The Island of Misfit Delinquents

9:57 am

King Azgeda: Had to make a small pit stop

Blake 2: What why

Blake 1: Just needed to stretch our legs

Murph-Man: All of us

King Azgeda: In separate directions

Caw Caw Little Birdy: Did you guys sing I’ll Make Love To You by Boyz To Men to each other again?

Commander Clarke: fuck you guys we’ve been over this

JJ Goggles: Idk what those others losers are talking about 

JJ Goggles: I was going IN on that song

Murph-Man: Yeah and making direct eye contact while singing it to us

JJ Goggles: Masculinity so fragile #cantrelate 


The Island of Misfit Delinquents

10:32 am

Blake 2: WHERE THE HELL ARE YOU GUYS

Commander Clarke: We’ve been waiting in the parking lot of the zoo for like 20 wtf

Caw Caw Little Birdy: O is starting to smell the fresh baked churros and honestly I’ve never been more afraid for my wellbeing 

Blake 2: HELLO

Blake 2: Listen here shit-for-brains 

Blake 2: You guys are going to get here and you are going to get here NOW

Caw Caw Little Birdy: Um pls hurry 

Smol Son Monty: NFJKVNFONVFONVM

Commander Clarke: Did you have a stroke while typing, Monty?

Blake 1: WE LITERALLY ALMOST JUST GOT MASS-MURDERED IN A GAS STATION FUCKLFNJENFBRU3

Nathan Miller: I have about eight million texts to read through but I’m glad I woke up to Bellamy’s frantic text about being deceased

Commander Clarke: Are you guys ok?!

JJ Goggles: We’re fine bUUUT Roan totally made me spill like half my flask down the front of my pants when he went to shield me and Monty with his chiseled upper body

King Azgeda: Sorry???

Nathan Miller: He’s a real fucking monster

Blake 1: Murphy went like MMA street fighter on this dudes ass

Blake 1: Like I’m not even kidding. This rando serial killer comes charging up to the cash register where we’re all standing and demands all the money and cigarettes and lotto scratchers

Smol Son Monty: And our wallets and anything expensive we had on us!!

Blake 1: He’s waving this gun around and the gas station clerk is scrambling around to gather all his demands. And then the guy turns around to us and puts the barrel right against mURPHY’S HEAD

Caw Caw Little Birdy: OHMYGOD

Caw Caw Little Birdy: Murphy are you hurt?! 

JJ Goggles: HURT!?!??

Smol Son Monty: he literally stEPS CLOSER TO THE GUY

King Azgeda: AND SMILES

Blake 2: FUCK. IT. UP. YAS BITCH

Blake 1: I honestly don’t even know what happened after that??? Like????

Blake 1: He’s literally standing there with the gun to his head one second and then the next he has this dude on the floor knocked tf out and with a broken wrist 

JJ Goggles: Like bone-popping-out-of-skin broken wrist 

Nathan Miller: I miss all the fun stuff :(

Murph-Man: Sorry the police just finished questioning me

Murph-Man: I’m all good Rey. Pinky Promise babe <3


The Island of Misfit Delinquents 

1:45 pm

Blake 2: Got my churros finally!!!!!!!!

King Azgeda: *churr-O’s happy dance.vid*

Commander Clarke: S’cute

Blake 1: Not as cute as Clarke tho

Murph-Man: I just barfed in my mouth

Smol Son Monty: Not to be like rude but the zoo is kinda underwhelming after the gas station

JJ Goggles: hella underwhelming 

Caw Caw Little Birdy: I’m just glad ya’ll are safe 

Commander Clarke: For real 

Blake 2: Don’t worry. Jasper is almost drunk enough to naked fight the zebras

Commander Clarke: what

Blake 2: what

JJ Goggles: Whhhhaaaaaaaaattttttttt

anonymous asked:

I really love your pregnancy aus and I mean I get why you can't do a "love scene" but can I ask what ur canon is for how it happened? On her birthday? Was he drunk and couldn't stop himself? Was she? One night stand? A one night only, and they pretended it never happened after? A desperate need kinda night? Does he remember? Does she? Did it start as a fight? Need the dets lol Cause they haven't mentioned it at all in the sets and don't act like they've had sex

While I do have a future set planned where they will finally talk about how baby Gecko came to be (because they are mastering the art of avoidance right now), I do have quite the headcanon about it. In fact, my headcanon is so developed that you could even call what you’re about to read….okay yeah it’s a fanfic that’s what’s happening here I’m sorry but just remember that you basically asked for sethkate smut okay? I’m also running seriously low on sleep so let’s blame this on that because I am perfectly aware of how ridiculous it is.

How the unplanned pregnancy au came to be.


  • It was really fucking hot. Like burn yourself on the metal of the seatbelt, all of your clothes are sticking to you, you just want to shove yourself into a freezer hot.
  • Their motel room, one of the worst yet, had no air conditioner because the thing had probably been broken for months and the manager didn’t really seem to care about it.
  • They’d been traveling for a day and a night trying to get away from a pack of culebras that spotted them so they were both too tired and done to find another place.

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