bob remus


Slytherins and Hufflepuffs are also wonderful, wonderful matches because a Hufflepuff can bring out the playful side to a Slytherin, make them feel wistful again, and a Slytherin would protect the Hufflepuff and keep them down to earth when they start to fly too far off.

For instance, I think of Linda Belcher as a Hufflepuff and Bob Belcher as a Slytherin. When Linda gets too much (Bed and Breakfast, Mother-Daughter Laser Razor) Bob speaks up against it knowing she’s too far out in space. And when Bob ends up working too hard or becomes a little too ambitious (Fleet Week, Bobsterfest) Linda is there to remind him to take a break or to reign him back in place.

  • [Singing children's songs with Harry, to minor success. Harry babbles along to the tune. Sometimes.]
  • Remus: [after bobbing his head along] Beautiful rendition of Itsy Bitsy Spider. Love the ad-lib of Harry shoving a finger up his nose at "down the water spout". The nose is a drain pipe of sorts, indeed. Genius.
  • Sirius: [resting his head on his hands] [hollowly] The book said he should be able to do this.
  • Remus: [amused] The book said WE should be teaching him songs, not that he'll burst into song like Bocelli. Isn't that right, Harry?
  • Harry: [nods]
  • Remus: Want to sing more? More songs?
  • Harry: [nods]
  • Remus: [points at Sirius] Ask Paddy. Say pleeeeaaaase.
  • Harry: Paddy pwease?
  • Sirius: [pretends not to notice]
  • Remus: Uh-oh. He can't hear you. More. Pleeeeaaaaaaase.
  • Harry: [louder] PWEEEEEAAAAAAASE.
  • Sirius: [grins] Godric's hairy pants, a toad has more rhythm than you. [pinches Harry's cheeks] I don't know why you like destroying the peace so much, but all right.
  • Remus: [sarcastic] Says the guy who ruined the microwave by running a Hunger Games - Fruit Edition. [mimicking Sirius's voice] Only one fruit can leave this microwave whole. May the odds be ever in your favor.
  • Sirius: Oi! You were just as curious as I was, Moony, don't deny it. [turns to Harry] [launches into a very animated rendition of Baa Baa Black Sheep]
Moony is gonna be okay. I made him a PB&J. He said he didn’t want it, so I ate it. He was still sad, so I made him another PB&J. He didn’t want that one either, so I ate it. Anyway, Moony wants to be alone for a little while and we’re out of peanut butter.
—  Sirius Black [to James, after a full moon]
  • Sirius: That was almost a major disaster!
  • Remus: Uh, you’re kind of exaggerating, Padfoot.
  • Sirius: I’m exaggerating?
  • Remus: Yeah, I think so, a little bit.
  • Sirius: That is literally the stupidest thing that anyone has ever said, in the history of mankind EVER!
  • Remus: Kids are horrible! Why do we keep making them?
  • Dumbledore: Do you need a hug?
  • Remus: No. Kind of? No.
  • Dumbledore: Sorry, Remus, I should have explained. Defense against the Dark Arts isn’t for honors students. It’s where dumb-dumbs learn to make sparks.
  • Remus: You know my best friend’s kid is in that class, right?
  • Dumbledore: Yes, Remus, I know.

Here we are then. A second part to the university AU that I never really intended to make anything else of, so we’ll see how this goes. 

I’ve changed the original to make it so Jily are already married and there’s some mild sexy stuff towards the end but nothing descriptive. 

It still doesn’t have a title so suggestions are welcome because all I can think of is being an arsehole and naming it after a hsm song at this point. 

Anyway, here we go then. Thanks for everyone who asked for more or talked to me about this. 

When Sirius knocked on his door at exactly 8pm the next evening, Remus was only half dressed.

“One minute!” he shouted, glad that they lived in the same house and he didn’t have to awkwardly go to the front door in his underwear.

Some time between their conversation in the early hours of the morning and now, Remus had remembered that Sirius was cool – a strange thing to think, he knew, but Sirius wore leather jackets and eyeliner and looked effortlessly handsome all the damn time. He knew that Sirius liked him, or fancied him at least, but what if he wanted to go to a trendy bar or café? Both Remus’ wardrobe and his self-esteem were a little unprepared for that.

So, he’d scrapped any hope of getting his course reading done in favour of a frantic search of his own wardrobe, and had spent longer than he’d like to admit pulling on different combinations of shirts and trousers.

Looking at himself one last time in the mirror, Remus shrugged helplessly at the black t-shirt and red checked button-up he was wearing. He looked more like a cowboy than anything else, or perhaps a lumberjack at best.

Still, Sirius was ready to go so it would have to do.

He took one more minute to attempt to flatten the sides of his hair into something that looked more tousled than dragged through a bush backwards, before finally deeming himself presentable, and stepping out into the hallway.

“Hey there,” Sirius said, leaning casually against the wall by his door and looking, as Remus had expected, irritatingly good.

“Hi,” Remus replied, “you all set?”

“Of course,” Sirius grinned, gesturing for Remus to walk ahead of him as they ventured down the stairs. They threw on jackets and were just about to open the front door when a horrible rumbling noise reached their ears, followed by the unmistakable sound of someone screaming.

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