INFP: Steals a book. The guilt eats away at them until they wake up at midnight and leave the book outside the bookstore with $20 and a tearful apology note.
INFJ: Steals a book. The guilt eats away at them silently, and their friends notice they are always clutching their heart. 7 years later, INFJ confesses to their sin and rips open their shirt, revealing an “A” carved into their chest, before dying as a martyr for human inadequacy. The “A” stands for “asshole,” they say.
ENFP: Steals a book because Kerouac would approve!
ISFJ: “I would never.” Gets in with the wrong crowd and participates in teenage stealing shenanigans. ISFJ, naturally, is the only one who gets caught.
ESTP: Is the bad influence friend. Is perfectly happy guzzling the stolen beer until they realize something isn’t right. Proceeds to break ISFJ out of jail and teach them how to shotgun a beer in the moonlight. <3
ENTP: Makes plan to steal THE MOON. Enters wrong shipping address when ordering rocket parts from amazon. By the time they realize the parts never came, they’re already over it.
INTJ: Steals ENTP’s plans, successfully steals the moon, caught after running into a poll when fleeing police.
ESTJ: Is the police. Steals a donut from Bob in accounting because that guy is an asshole. Also they were hungry.
ISTP: Steals the donut from ESTJ’s mouth. How did they do it???
ESFJ: Steals underwear from Victoria’s Secret. Is caught on the way out of the store, but talks their way into getting off punishment free with the underwear as a free gift for their trouble.
ENTJ: Steals control of the nation. When did ENTJ become Supreme Leader again? People aren’t sure. Hasn’t it always been that way?
ESFP: Steals your heart and loses it a few days later. At least they found their car keys!
ISFP: Steals your heart and proceeds to break it. Unfortunately for you, there are no returns on damaged goods.
ENFJ: Steals your identity. After a few weeks of knowing them, you notice ENFJ has adopted your mannerisms and chameleoned themself to your personality. They just want to be the best friend they can be, they explain.
INTP: Steals a first edition Avengers comic, not because they don’t have the money, but because they’re too lazy to walk to the register.
ISTJ: “WHY DOES EVERYONE KEEP STEALING FROM ME???”
Imagine being the punk, rebellious kid in class and Teen!Tony having a fucking huuuge crush on you. (Requested: Genderfluid they/them pronouns)
——— Request for anon ———
“Ah, (Y/N), so good of you to finally show up to class,” the teacher sarcastically quips as you enter the classroom, a lazy sort of indifference in your eyes as you regard the teacher in a bit of annoyance. “All the seats are taken, aside from the one beside Mr. Stark.”
“I have eyes,” you comment as you brush past the teacher towards the only open seat meant for you in front of your friend. The teacher starts back on the lesson before you have a chance to sit down, but Tony’s attention has already been completely captured with you.
He leans forward as you plop down in the seat, “What? Did the truancy officer catch you this time?”
“Old Bob couldn’t catch a donut if it was running from him,” you try to keep your snort quiet, before looking back at him in an endeavor to catch the blush you were sure to elicit from the boy who had been pining after you for longer than you’d noticed, “Maybe I came to class today to see you?”
My day at Wondercon on Friday was AMAZING. I was passing out donuts left and right, hanging with my awesome friends, and meeting some cool people!
Cosplaying as Sadie from Steven Universe was a BLASTY BLAST.
Highlights of the day: Running into Korra and Asami on their Turtleduck Date. And a random girl fangirling at my feet and telling me I was her head cannon of IRL Sadie. BLESS YOU, RANDOM TUMBLR GIRL. Made my whole day. :)