blue fringe jacket

Phil fucking goddammit Lester

Title: Phil fucking goddammit Lester

Genre: high school/boarding school au with all the fluffs and agnsts and some smutty chapters later

Warnings: none really except for swearing and mentions of smoking oh and also really shit titles

Summary: Dan really liked it here. Here he could focus on his work and his friendsand keeping a low profile and he could just be. But then Phil Lester comes along and fucks everything up. Phil Lester is the school bad boy. He wears leather jackets and smokes and has tattoos and piercings and has sex in the bathrooms. He’s the exact opposite of little shy Dan Howell with his flower crowns and pastel jumpers.


It’s the first day of school. Ridgewell Private School is in the middle of nowhere, far from Dan’s parents and town.

As he walk threw the front doors of his dormitory and into the office he notices his best friend pj. Pj’s sitting with Chris, his other best friend. They spot Dan and motion for home to come sit down with them. He walks over, sets his stuff down and sits across from pj. They’re waiting to be assigned their dorm rooms so they talk about their summer vacation, what teachers they want to have (or don’t want to have) and school in general. When Dan hears his name called he lifts himself off the chair and walks to the desk where one of his favorite people in the whole world is sitting with a bright smile and and dyed pink hair.

“Hi, Louise” Dan says with a smile.

“Hello Daniel” she says back with a laugh.

“Don’t call me that!” Dan says as he feels a blush rising on his cheeks.

“Oh, stop it. I can call you whatever I please.”

“Anyway, what’s my dorm room” he’s say hastily wanting to change the subject.

“You’ll be in room 405. It’s on the 4th floor so here’s the elevator key.” She exclaims and hands Dan a laniard with 2 keys on it.

One is bronze and worn down from use. The other is fairly new and silver. He takes them and nods as he makes his way back to where Peej and Chris are sitting. He informs them of his room number and then grabs his bags and makes his way to the elevator.


He presses the button for the elevator and waits. The door opens a few moments later and out walks Phil Lester. Phill fucking Lester. With his dyed black hair and electric blue fringe tips. His leather jacket covering his tight black t-shirt that shows of how lean but muscular he is. He has a lighter and box of cigarettes in his hands. His snake bites glisten in the florescent lights of the hallway. He can see a few of his tattoos. They suit him very well. At least the ones he can see from underneath the cuff of his jacket and the ones adorning his Chet and neck springing up from the collar of his shirt. He looks so fucking hot. Like so fucking hot.

Dan just gawks at him. He freezes when Phil brushes past him not really noticing the boy until he stumbles into the elevator. They turn around simultaneously and lock eyes for a second. Dan blushes as Phil looks him up and down then smirks. Dan wants the walls of the elevator to swallow him whole, because Phil fucking goddammit Lester smirked at him. And fuck it was hot.

When he gets to his room it’s unlocked. Probably because his roommate has already got there. He pushes the door open and expects to see some kid unpacking his stuff, but the room is empty except for a suitcase on one of the beds. It’s decorated with a blue and green plaid duvet and little lion plushies. A Buffy poster is hanging half assed on the wall.

Dan wonders for a second who is roommate might be then decides it’s not that important seeing as he’ll just ignore them whoever they are and hang with Chris and Peej. He begins to unpack. Firstly grabbing the bag he knows has his bedding in it. He pulls out his black and grey plaid duvet and notices that it matches the one sprawled on the other bed. He laughs to myself as he pulls out his aqua colored sheets. He quickly makes his bed not forgetting to put his Haru body pillow on the right side.

He turns to grab his suitcase with his clothes in it and his flower crown swings off his head. At the same time the door swings open and Dan can hear whistling and the loud smack of bubble gum. He looks up to see a structured face. His cheekbones quite high and prominent on his face. His jawline very defined with a tiny hint of stubble on it. His nose is slightly crooked and a nose piercing hangs from his left nostril.The most beautiful part is the boys eyes. Clear blue with thin stripes of green that match the duvet run out from his pupils. Little specks of yellowish gold litter the iris. It looks as if you could swim in them. The black hair on the boys head slightly covers one of his eyes and he notices it dyed a familiar blue. Dan is mesmerized but is quickly snapped back to reality by the smack of gum and the low gravelly “Hey” that leaves the boys perfect mouth pierced by two metal rings on either side of his bottom lip. Dan recognizes the voice and the hair and the eyes and takes a step back to see Phil Lester in all his glory.

“Hey,” he says again a little louder this time.

“H-hi” Dan manages to squeak out.

Phil chuckles a little and moves past Dans almost frozen form. He picks up Dans flower crown and hands it to him.

“Th-thanks” Dan splutters out. Phil turns to his bed and plops down on it reaching for the phone in his back pocket.

Dan turns and continues unpacking as nonchalantly as possible. He can feel Phil’s eyes on him as he bends over to get his clothes out of his suitcase. Heat rising in his cheeks and spreading across his body.


“So, Flowerboy…” Are the first words Phil utters to Dan the rest of the day. “…like what you see.”

Dan is surprised by the comment and turns around still blushing from earlier.

“U-uh uhm, what?” He stutters and mentally curses himself for letting Phil have this affect on him.

“I said, ‘do you like what you see?’” Phil repeated. He got up and walked over to where Dan was standing beside the wardrobe. He continued to back Dan up until his back was flush against the wall and Phil was looming over him staring hungrily.

Dan nodded frantically as Phil ghosted his hand over the boys thigh. Dan whimpered and Phil backed all the way up until he hit the wall opposite Dan, leaning like he owned the whole building. He looked Dan up and down and laughed once before getting up and blowing Dan a kiss then walking out the door leaving Dan to ponder what the fuck just happened.

Later when he’s hanging with Peej waiting for the orientation to start he tells him all about what happened.

Peej stares at him, a look of nervousness and pity washing over his face as Dan continues with the story. Peej lost his virginity to Phil Lester in year 10. It tore him up real bad because after, Phil pretty much pretended like it hadn’t happened. He’s mostly over it now but Dan knows he doesn’t want that to happen to him. Pj has always been very protective over his friends.

When Dan finished telling him all about it Peej looked more angry and concerned than pitiful.

“This is bad Dan really really bad. You need to stay away from him. He’ll chew you up and spit you out then walk over you like a paper bag blowing in the wind.”

“Damn Peej calm down. I know that and I will stay as far away from him as possible.”

“Promise me”

“Ugh, ok I promise.” Dan held out his hand for Pj and he took it shaking wearily.


Chris had come to sit down with them and orientation started as usual. The administration saying how wonderful it was for everyone to be back and introduced some new teachers and staff. Then he got on to the bit about expectations and rules and dress code. Unlike most boarding school, Ridgewell didn’t require a uniform. Dan loved that bit because he was free to wear his pastel jumpers and skinny jeans and his little flower crowns.

Everything was going quite smoothly. They split off into groups and wandered the campus with a guide telling them about all the great opportunities and clubs and things they had to offer. Dan hadn’t noticed he was in the same group with Phil until they reached they science hall and Phil brushed past him. Phil cupped dans ass and squeezed ever so lightly making a small gasp escape from Dans mouth without his permission. He saw Phil smirk as he moved forward to get to one of his friends. Pj burned a death glare into the back of Phil’s head. He was absolutely fuming and Dan could see that. His fists were not balled up and he was moving tensely.

“Hey Peej calm down ok. It’s fine I won’t let him do that again”

“No it’s not Dan. He can’t do to you what he did to me. I won’t let that happen.”

“What are you all going on about?” Chris said hesitantly looking over to Dan

“I’ll tell you later” Dan said a little reluctance in his voice.

When orientation was finished everyone went back to there respective dormitory. Dan stayed with Peej and Chris for a while since they were assigned the same room. They ordered a pizza from the campus call box and talked about school and everything. They played a quick few games of Mario kart before it was time for roll call.

Dan returned back to his room to find Phil lying on his bed on his phone with a big evil grin on his face. Dan scurried to the bathroom and locked the door behind him. He took a quick shower and got dressed for bed. He was wearing a mint green shirt with a large Eiffel Tower printed on it in black. He wore just his regular pastel boxer briefs and laid out his clothes for the next day. He walked out of the bathroom and Phil looked exactly the same as he had left him minus the maniacal grin. His jacket was laying on the edge of his bed and now Dan could see his various tattoos. A galaxy crawled up his chest and neck. A graphically drawn lion adorned his biceps and a dragon crawled up his wrist. He had loads and loads of tattoos but those were the ones that stuck out to Dan. Dan cursed himself when he realized he had stopped in his tracks just to stare at Phil.

When he looked away it was already too late. Phil had noticed and he was smirking again. That fucking smirk that made him look like a hungry hyena searching for his pray.

Phil stood up and pulled his shirt and jeans off and walked into the bathroom in just his boxers leaving his clothes on the floor. As he walked past Dan to the bathroom Dan turned to look. He could see all of his tattoos now. He had two diamonds placed on his pelvic bones and another dragon sprawled on his back creeping up to meet the nape of his neck. He had tiny stars and dots littered across his arm in different shades of purple and blue and black. They surrounded other tattoos to form a very spaced out looking sleeve down Phil’s arm. A few different roses in different colors and patterns adorned his neck and chest. Though all of them were different they all seemed to work very nicely together.

When Dan realized what he was doing it was too late (again). Phil was grinning as he said “wanna join me?” In a low smooth tone. Dan tore his eyes away from Phil’s body to look at his face. Dan’s eyes widened and he managed to squeeze out a small ‘no’ before turning to crawl into his bed. Phil continued into the bathroom. Dan heard the water turn on and he slowly but surely fell into a restless sleep before Phil got out.