bleaching of teeth

So what’s happening? Are audiences such mule-fucking sociopaths they can’t go a minute without a blood-covered spectacle? Or are elite critics so far up their own asses that their next whitewashing complaint will be about the backs of their own bleached teeth?

Sorry to say – the answer might be neither. As I’ve noticed from purely anecdotal experience, none of these films are beloved or hated by the same group of people. Someone who loved It Follows might hate The Witch, and someone who loved The Witch might hate The Babadook, and et cetera. And some people (like me) might love all of these films, and have friends they respect and admire who don’t like any of them.

So I have a theory – one that doesn’t force me to repeatedly suplex all my friends. The reason these movies stand out as being polarizing isn’t just because they are slower and more atmospheric. It’s because they’re actually an entirely new genre of horror that works drastically differently on different types of people. Why? Because all of these films are extremely allegorical to some real-world problem or philosophy. And while critics and movie nerds are more likely to pick up on this, the casual horror-goer isn’t going to care unless it’s an analogy they are specifically attuned with. Nine times out of ten they just want a fear-induced rush to enjoy with their date.

I’m gonna call it “Parable Horror” and hope that it sticks. Or maybe “Alle-gore-y”? Wait. Let’s call it “Scarable.” That’s way better. Are we all cool with “Scarable”? I feel like I shouldn’t be the only person in charge of naming a new genre… but I also feel like I just hit it out of the park.

How ‘Get Out’ Is Pioneering A Brand New Genre Of Horror

Exasperating also starts with E

(Note: this is an Au where Eurus never killed VT and grew up as normal in the Holmes household as the baby of the family, she’s still a sociopath, so this happened…)

“Are you ever going to tell Molly Hooper that you love her?” Was the first thing Sherlock heard upon entering Baker Street after a long case, admittedly he should be used to his little sister showing up at his flat for no reason other than to annoy him, but honestly he thought it was Mycroft’s turn this month .

“And good evening to you too Eurus” Sherlock sighed turning around to find her sitting in his chair casually eating from a tub of (obviously expensive, imported specifically for high priority clients, delivered just two hours ago by a messenger with sweaty hands) Marchetti Gelato, she was wearing the Pajamas Mycroft had give her last Christmas and apparently seemed to have the ludicrous idea that he was back to his eight year old self who’d indulged her in as many pretend tea parties as she wished “I thought you said sleepovers were for goldfishes and amoeba brained females not worth associating with”

(Adult Eurus had never graduated from her ‘force my brothers to play tea party with me’ phase. And unlike Mycroft, who’d easily used his seniority to escape their little sister’s manipulative feminine machinations as soon as humanly possible, Sherlock never really had it in him to push her away)

“And he avoids my question, big surprise there, do have some Gelato, I even had this Ginger Nut flavor comissioned just for you” Eurus smiled extending the tub in his direction “you know that you are my favorite brother don’t you?”

“Yes I am aware, considering that the other option is Mycroft and I always win by default, although I apreciate the effort to sweeten what will undoubtedly be a conversation fraught with manipulation tactics and no I do not love Molly Hooper” Sherlock replied, putting away his bellstaff loosening his scarf and accepting the gelato “speaking of which how is your dear James?”

“Still hiding behind his lawyer in an effort to avoid me” Eurus sighed dramatically with a wave of her hand

“Well to be fair Moriarty isn’t an idiot, I think most men would prefer his high security prison in the middle east over facing your wrath after his failure to remember your aniversary” Sherlock didn’t have to make his disapproval of his sister’s choice of boyfriend known, after all it was the frequent topic of discussion among family dinners and the only subject Mycroft and he agreed on lately, but when it came to life sentences the Holmes brothers didn’t think that there was anything worse than being subjected to Eurus and the mercurial moods she hid under her sociopathic personality, so they both refrained from outright trying to get themselves rid of him.

“As James should” Eurus huffed “but he won’t be able to plead guilty forever if I make sure evidence of the contrary begins to accumulate around him” And considering the latest petty crime Moriarty had pleaded guilty for involved the assassination of a well known Middle East religious leader, Sherlock didn’t doubt his sister’s threat “are we done with your deflections Sherlock?, answer me already, when is that love confession taking place?”

“Very well Eurus, I’ll humor you” the ‘else you’ll never let the subject drop’ was implied but thankfully not voiced, if one thing was true among the Holmes family was that Sherlock loved his like minded sister and rarely left an opportunity to talk to her go to waste “why do you think that I am as you so eloquently put it 'in love’ with Molly Hooper when you know I firmly believe that sentiment is a waste of time”

“Because you are, do you need me to make a PowerPoint presentation to illustrate it?” Eurus snorted, reminding Sherlock of their teenage years and her old perchance for whining about always being right “Anyone with high IQ can see it”

“So Papa has finally given you the grandchildren ultimatum huh?”

“No more than he gave it to Mycroft but that’s not the point”

“Youre his only daughter of course its the point, Papa wants grandbabies to spoil and you as the daddy’s girl that you are, do not want to dissapoint him, you wouldn’t be here trying to matchmake me otherwise” Sherlock shot back smugly “stop saying I’m in love with Molly”

“may I remind you that of all the people in this sentiment riddled universe Molly Hooper is the only one you’ve voluntarily apologized to?”

“It doesn’t prove anything” Sherlock dodged sitting in his armchair “I respect Molly, she’s my friend”

“You analyze her life choices and clothing preferences more than you do any other female in your acquaintance and that includes mummy, Mrs Hudson, Mary Watson and Me” Eurus listed off ticking her fingers “I don’t have much experience with actual friends but as the social manipulation expert in this family I can tell you that friends do not do that”

“I do NOT analyze Molly’s life choices, I deduce them and offer helpful advice, which according to John IS what friends do”

“Then why do you always hold your deductions whenever the topic of sex comes up around her?” Eurus challenged him with a smug smile as if to say 'go ahead, try to deduce yourself out of that question’ “it wouldn’t happen to be because your mind palace automatically supplies complimentary material would it? You used to say that intercourse was part of human nature”

Sherlock internally blanched, his sister really knew too much “because it has come to my attention that talking about someone else’s sexual habits and preferences in a social setting is potentially embarrassing for them”

“I see I’ll have to help you along, honestly your level of denial is quite impressive” If Eurus had been a little younger she’d have reached for fake glasses and written Sherlock’s name on a clipboard like she used to do when she’d mockingly declared she wanted to be a psychologist after her tenure in Sherrinford “why if its potentially embarrassing do you still do it to virtually anyone…exept Molly?”

“Because Molly is different, she’s not an idiot, she’s useful to me and good at her job”

“So you get no satisfaction out of making her feel like an idiot I understand, yet one could argue that Mycroft and I arent idiots either and you infer about our sexual lives often enough” Eurus pointed out taking a spoonful of gelato “why is molly different?”

“Because she is!” Sherlock grunted instantly regretting it by the knowing look his younger sister was giving him “what I mean to say is that, talking to her about the subject never feels correct to me, Molly isn’t …”

“Able to talk about sex like a normal adult? Why Sherlock she’s a healthy woman in her thirties who disects naked human bodies for a living, I would think she’s probably very open about it” Eurus ventured innocently “her past boyfriends seem like they were enjoying themselves at the very least”

“Would you please stop taking about Molly Hooper and sexual expertise in the same sentence!” The consulting detective finally snapped

“You ruin all her relationships”

“Its not my fault that she seems to attract men with criminal tendencies”

“Oh please, you announce to any who can hear the most inconsequential things, who cares if the paralegal with the bleach teeth was evading his taxes? His only crime was talking to your precious pathologist during her lunch break” why was it that Eurus always managed to sound fifteen whenever she tried to meddle in his life?, she was a genius in all parts of her life, but as a sister Eurus Holmes could really be a pain in Sherlock’s ass when she wanted to be"If you haven’t deduced it, I’ll have you know even James could tell that her relationships are your blind spot”

“Please don’t remind me about the famous 'Jim from IT’ considering that masquerading as Molly’s date isnt an ideal way of meeting my younger sister’s psychopath boyfriend ”

“ Life partner” Eurus corrected without missing a beat “James and I don’t use amaeba terms to classify our conection” then remembering something funny she added with a chuckle “The 'Molly factor’ blindsided your deductions so badly you even thought James was gay, as if someone like him would limit himself by the sexuality and gender of his partners”

“Nowdays I even doubt that he’s limited by their consent, species or lack of pulse” Sherlock rolled his eyes, glaring at his sister “But then again he’s saddled with you, so what should I expect? After all I’ve seen his bruises and heard the tortured screams”

“What can I say I like things rough and James is the only man I know who gives as good as he gets” Eurus shrugged and Sherlock had to remind himself that she wasn’t the type to worry about the gender, sexual orientation, lack of consent or inmorality of her sexual acts either “he has a certain je nes se quais that fits me so well”

“Spare me the details Eurus, there’s a reason I never frequent your Knightsbridge flat”

“Me thinks the gentleman doth protest too much, your Molly hasn’t been raised under a rock you know, why, if my airlines didn’t keep me so busy I’d think I might even grow to like her, I would wager my escapes with James wouldn’t shock her”

“Keep your evil machinations away from Molly Hooper sister mine” Sherlock warned narrowing his eyes “You already played you games with John and it almost cost him his marriage, if you so much as try the same on Molly so help me science I will make you regret it”

“Why would I want to make my future sister in law despise me?” Eurus laughed letting Sherlock see in her eyes a glint of the madness she kept firmly under lock and key in the confines of her own mind palace “you should really hasten that love confession Sherlock, you won’t be virile forever you know, after all we don’t know if all those drugs you’ve taken in the past have affected your fertility” she taunted in a sing song voice

“I’m perfectly fertile and perfectly virile! Molly would have nothing to complain about in that aspect” Sherlock exclaimed outraged realizing belatedly thst he’d falken for Eurus’ bait “I meant it in a purely hypothetical situation”

“ARGH I blame Mycroft for this! If he hadn’t put the 'emotions are evil’ mantra in your head you wouldn’t be acting like a preschooler pulling the pigtails of the girl he fancies” Eurus groaned putting her head in her hands “what have I done to deserve this?” The answer : probably a lot

“Funny, Mycroft blames you for crippling Victor’s legs in that blasted well and coloring my perception of human relationships with trauma”

“He locked me in SHERRINFORD for three years because of it, excuse me if I disregard his opinion on the state of your psyche”

Sherlock sighed, he supposed they all were self fulfilling prophecies, being the middle child in a family of geniuses had never been easy, specially because their whole sibling dynamic hinged on Sherlock’s hability to stay neutral in the feud between Eurus and Mycroft, who by all means hated each other during a good day

But Eurus liked Sherlock and Mycroft liked Sherlock so they made an effort to not attempt mutual murder if it kept them in their middle brother’s good graces.

“Sherlock you leave me no choice! If you don’t get your head out of your rectal cavity where Molly Hooper is concerned and tell her that you love her I’ll have to force the issue with Mycroft” Eurus outlined in no uncertain terms, eyes flashing the way they only did when she played violin “and believe me I won’t be as nice to him as I’m to you”

“It would take a battering ram to knock down Mycroft long enough to give papa grandchildren and we both know it” Sherlock exclaimed, then narrowing his eyes the posibility that Eurus was in fact unhinged enough to put her brain to the task of breaking Mycroft “you wouldn’t, even YOU have to draw a line somewhere”

“Andrea has been working with him for how long? Since high school if I’m not mistaken, I happen to know a philanthropic a armament mogul that is looking for a public relations manager and well…How bored must Andrea be in that silly little desk, chained to our brother, doing paperwork all day, a woman of her capabilities deserves more and Mycroft doesnt let her do an ounce of fieldwork, if I happened to offer the position to her, adding the fact that our mogul has the highest number of assassination attempts in any bounty hunter’s book, she’d accept right away, if only to get to use her fancy guns” Eurus began innocently as tough outlining her lunch break plans

Deducing exactly who she was referring to Sherlock groaned “Nikolai Udinov? You would send Andrea to manage the life of that reprobate? Mycroft would never allow it”

“Well what do you expect? If Andrea leaves her job and him for good I calculate that it will take Mycroft less than two months to crack, she does his laundry, paperwork, calls, orders him his cakes, decorates his bunkers, manages his agents with an iron fist, Andrea practically breathes for him and Mycroft needs the wake up call” Eurus smiled with a hint of malice “so many agents have fallen in Udinov’s maze of secrets…It would be a pity if Mycroft’s greek flower was next”

“That’s because Nikolai Udinov is the type of assignment that goverment agents train for years to take on, the bullseye in his back is larger than Mycroft’s ego ” Sherlock snapped wondering again why he hadnt trottled his sister yet “you’d be manipulating Andrea into strong arming Godfather Death”

“Correction Mycroft will THINK she’s taking on Godfather Death” Eurus snapped rolling her eyes “She’ll be fine, I wasn’t lying when I said Agent Anthea is quite competent and she’s been wanting to do fieldwork since her thirtieth birthday, my people will make sure she doesn’t get killed”

Sherlock didn’t even want to ask about who 'her people’ were, like he did with Mycroft and they did with him, the less the Holmes siblings knew about eachother’s ocassional dabblings in the wrong side of the law the better “You’ll just have Mycroft believe she is, but why?”

Eurus huffed tempted to just repeat Sherlock’s famous 'you see but you don’t observe’ dribble that he always spewed to John Watson “Because it will kill Mycroft to lose Andrea and I’ll enjoy seeing him suffer” Eurus shrugged “think about it Sherlock, Andrea has been a fixture in Mycroft’s life since your uni days, the only time you and I see him without her is on social situations and even then she’s always one text away from him, he trusts her with all of his sensitive information”

“You assume that he cares about her” Sherlock snorted mystified “Mycroft doesnt do sentiment Eurus, not even for Andrea”

“Oh how blind my brothers can be when they wish to” Eurus laughed taking out a bag of chips from her purse and biting a couple “I don’t assume, I KNOW, just as I know that you love Molly, the difference is that Andrea is more likely to wait to have children, but as I said I’ll force the issue if I have to”

“If Agent Anthea dies because you wanted to get out of giving our parents grandchildren then forget about Sherrinford, he’ll hire a submarine and drop you in the Atlantic with a crew of deaf personell”

“You could also tell your morgue mouse that you love her, then I wont have to threaten Mycroft’s potted plant”

Eurus like always, had a better grasp of the ins and outs of sentiment than her two elder brothers, a fact both Sherlock and Mycroft often resented, because while Sherlock fought his battles with logic and Mycroft with dry politics, Eurus manipulated people using their emotions against them. She’d rarely used her 'gift’ on Sherlock preferring to keep herself occupied with her chain of airlines and her side work as a data analyst (when she wasn’t dabbling in her illegal hobbies) apparently tough she was doing it now.

Sherlock didn’t find it amusing.

“I suppose I should be grateful that you have not threatened to kill Molly yet and instead chose to talk to me about it in a rational way, isn’t that what your point is?”

“Yes! And I feel deeply offended that you don’t appreciate the gesture, I could have bulldozed trough your childhood traumas just to make you see sense” Eurus huffed clearly not happy by Sherlock’s lack of gratitude “I don’t see why you wont just admit the truth”

“You’re seeing things where they don’t exist, don’t you think that if zi loved Molly I would know?”

“NO! BECAUSE YOU DON’T UNDERSTAND SENTIMENT” she shot back with an angry glare, then Eurus sighed and did the one thing that always brought Sherlock to his knees, she opened her big dark eyes and gave him a very sincere part of her vulnerability “Sherlock” she began, her tone belying how much she wasn’t trying to manipulate him this time “you’ve been there for me trought all the hard things in my life, you who have supported me even in things we both know you knew better than to support…Is it really such a surprise to know that I want to see you happy?”

“as my little sister, wanting to see me happy comes with the territory” Sherlock replied putting the desert down and returning her sincerety “the truth is that I don’t see a future where I can keep Molly safe, I have too many enemies…she deserves better than me, she always has”

“And yet she loves you, all of you, far strongly than you deserve”

“Foolish woman that she is” Sherlock chuckled “I can’t love her Eurus, I’d be placing a red mark in her forehead if I did”

“Sherlock, there’s always going to be Blackwoods, Magnussens and Black Lotus organisations in this world, in fact there’s drunk drivers and bad weather and unhealthy eating habits all who cause death on daily basis, but for you there’s only one Molly” Eurus tried reasoning softly “ its hard enough for people like us to form lasting human connections, I’ve come to learn it takes years of persistence to completely bond with someone else and the fact that you are capable of it is something I’ve always admired far beyond Mycroft’s Iceman facade”

“Speaking from experience?” He raised an eyebrow taking care not to break the fragile bubble of vulnerability they’d reached

“Its always nice to know that there’s always someone out there who will care about you beyond the trappings of your psyche” Eurus agreed cryptically, giving Sherlock a tiny insight into the twisted reason why his sister hadn’t allowed Moriarty to blow his brains off after Sherlock’s fall “isn’t that how Molly makes you feel? I admit she’s no Nocturne like Irene Adler in looks or sexual appeal but I don’t believe I could be wrong in what I see when you look at her while her back is turned”

“Don’t put Molly in the same category as the woman…Irene is a capriccio, an Intermezzo with too many Staccato harmonies and not enough tenerezza, more Opera than Nocturne she’s filled with high octaves and acciaccaturas, Molly is her own sonata”

“Now that is quite surprising” It had never occurred to Eurus that Sherlock might have a melody for Molly, mainly because if he did he’d want Eurus to hear it at least once, given her brother and her shared a love for violin that often lent itself to describing people in musical terms according to how they saw the world but honestly Eurus expected Sherlock to classify Molly as a chloral “how does Molly sound?”

“Molly is shades of Adagios, Dolce notes and intermitent Allegros, that rise and fall without damaging the integrity of the composition, any more notes and she could have been a ballet or a solft waltz” Sherlock sounded so sure, humming a few bars to let her understand the gist of his thoughts, always far more comfortable expressing sentiment trough music than in words

“I wonder why you have never played her for an audience” Eurus genius that she was didn’t need to see him play to hear the notes in her head, the soft tone of the violin and the spikes of the Sonata’s hidden edges “she sounds like comming home” was all Eurus could say after the song finished playing in her mental fortress “your very own masterpiece”

“Her melody isn’t for public to hear” Sherlock replied ruminanting in his sister’s words, because she had put into words the elusive title that he’d never given to the Sonata that belonged to Molly Hooper 'comming home’ was an apt name for the piece and if he was honest with himself he had to admit it had been that way for a long time, Molly herself was the kind of person who’s existence validated the part of Sherlock who needed a place to run to when things got difficult “she makes me feel accepted, when it comes to Molly I always know that whatever I do, or wherever I go, I will always have a place to call home in her life, the Sonata always changes in degrees of subtleties” hadn’t that been the reason he’d felt so hurt by her (failed) engagement to Meat dagger? Because he’d assumed she would always be there… and on the heels of that thought the realization struck “Because I love her”

Eurus could have clapped her hands in joy at the breaktrough of her brother, and to think it hadn’t taken any death threats, really Sherlock was so much better to reason with than Mycroft “then why do you keep wasting so much time?” She asked still trying to be understanding

“You don’t understand Eurus, I LOVE HER” Sherlock exclaimed in shock and Eurus could see the beginning of what looked like a very Holmes panic attack “And I’ve hurt her in the past so badly…and you KNEW” he was referring of course to the fact that Eurus hadn’t told him what she suspected since day one

“In all honesty I thought that you would have noticed your attraction to your pathologist since the moment you began your game of 'flirting for organs’ I didn’t expect the situation to last this long” Eurus admitted sheepishly reminding Sherlock of the way she used to intentionally assume that he’d clean his bedroom when he had a nasty experiment rotting in his desk, conveniently not reminding him to throw it away “its not my fault, its yours” So maybe his mind palace was undergoing a major rearrangement, Eurus could work with that..hopefully

“What do I do now?” Sherlock groaned putting his head in his hands “I love her”

“You do whatever mummy would do I suppose, she’s the one who is good at handling non-sociopaths” Eurus tried to help along “maybe you should confer with Dr Watson, I fear my continued advice in that subject would nderimental to your latest breaktrough” Aka: Eurus would not give Sherlock romantic life hacks, she simply wasn’t willing to.

“Mummy…would make lunch, maybe a pot of her favourite tea” Sherlock agreed pensively “and ease Molly slowly into the situation”

“Not too slowly, I want my first nephew to be born preferably within the next year or so” Eurus asserted as tough she were giving Sherlock her takeaway order “you will make mostly male children given both of your genetic profiles but I’d still like at least one of them to be named after me if possible”

“Have you ever thought that Molly might not want children? If anything she hasn’t agreed to even date me yet, let alone get engaged or conceive with me…”

“Tiny crime solving pathologists?” Eurus supplied when he couldn’t bring himself to say the word children “Sherlock a basic deduction of Molly’s life would point towards a desire for a nuclear family, more to the point she’d want it and she’d want it with you, the only sibling in our circle liable to be successful in raising another generation of Holmes geniuses” considering Mycroft and Eurus would most likely cause their offspring some degree of psychological issues with their parenting techniques, it didn’t sound so much like a compliment

Aaaand there went their bonding moment, Eurus was back to her manipulative self “Maybe you should leave” Sherlock muttered comming in and out of buffering mode “as much as I enjoy our interludes, I don’t think I’m fit for company or will be for the next few hours”

“Maybe I should, my work here is done” Eurus agreed rising from her seat and dusting her Pajamas “I expect that a sleepover wouldn’t be any fun anyway, not with the way your thoughts are shouting”

Noticing the changes in the tone of her voice Sherlock briefly paused his panic attack to regard his sister with a suspicious stare “Stay away from my pathologist Eurus, I mean it”

“I will, but be a smart boy and keep an eye on her, I heard your old friend Victor is back in town” Eurus attempted to joke “Maybe you should move her here for a few days, you know, for security reasons” And with that parting shot his sister breezed out of Baker Street leaving a very stressed Sherlock no choice but to phone Molly

“Gasp and Bloody Works what can I do for you?” Molly’s cheerful voice answered her mobile, Sherlock could hear the sound of a bone saw in the distance and deduced he’d caught her in the middle of an autopsy

A million thoughts raced trough his head but he settled for a mundane response, no need to alarm her “Bad time for a call?”

“Oh it’s you Sherlock, sorry I didn’t see the caller ID, funny you should phone I just got the most interesting body with a unidentified brain aneurysm, I thought you might find it interesting so no its not a bad time at all” she always sounded in good mood whenever he called, give or take a few exemptions, Molly always tried her best to be positive about everything including his cases.

“Really? A brain you say” Sherlock perked up before remembering the subject at hand “actually I was calling to ask for a favor, but the brain aneurysm sounds quaint, please save it for future study”

'smooth Sherlock real smooth’ mind palace john muttered

'Not now Watson’

Molly who knew him well enough to know that if he wanted to ask for something big he’d do it in person and not by phone had no qualms in replying “what kind of favor? Sherlock is this for a case?, you know that as long as its within my power I will help you”

“No its not for a case, this is more of a personal favor, I need to stay in your flat for an undefined amount of time” there he said it now all he had to do was get Molly to agree, because while this wasn’t the first time he’d used her place as a bolthole it was the one time he’d do it for sentiment’s sake and consent was important.

“Wait, why? Are you okay” the bone saw was turned off and Sherlock could hear the unecessary concern in the voice of the woman he’d just realised he loved.

“yes I’m fine, but I have reasons to believe that my privacy in Baker Street has been compromised” and he needed to make sure Molly’s hadn’t been. Lest Eurus perchance for giving people a push in the right direction landed Molly in the bottom of a well.

“By who?”

Sherlock gave a long suffering sigh and answered “by my sister”

An: I’ve thought up Eurus as a dark version of Georgiana to Sherlock’s Mr Darcy hope she wasn’t to occ, this fic is for all my Sherllolian folks on tumblr, who are just awesome

anonymous asked:

How can I achieve the LA girl lifestyle?

?? bleaching your teeth white in a motel swimming pool, only eating raw fish and avocado, ‘ethical’ shopping at reformation and realisation par, pair layered gold chokers and large hoops, either light embroidered denim jackets or red pu latex boots / feminist or lolita inspired slogan crop tees, causally featuring in your friends’ disposable film photoshoots, lingering in 24/7 convenience stores, wear only take me to church inspired jewellery and literally anything to do with the neon glow


Bleach those teeth (crest white strips), fade those stretch marks (olive oil and vitamin E pills) and rap your favorite bad bitch confidence building song in the mirror (Remy Ma conceited or Lil Kim No matter, whatever you like). Anddddddddddddd Never wait for a man to make you feel like you’re THAT bitch….. you already are! 💖💓😩😭😂

Teruki was sickly sweet.

He was golden honey, thick and rich, dripping off of cracked, brittle bones that were rotted through the middle. His skin was dried, cracked syrup, gooey and sticky to the touch. Teru’s hair was golden ribbons, too dull and weathered to shine under the sun’s rays. He was emotionless smiles full of sharp, bleach white teeth. He was vacant eyes that shone gold under the right light, but were pupilless and void of anything.

The oldest coyote of the bunch has a broken tooth. Looks a bit infected. Of all the coyotes he’s the only one that shows any real wear on his teeth.

After inspecting them all closer it seems they have been boiled clean. Luckly grease stains are minimal. Nothing that can’t be fixed with a soak in some bio detergent a d water. Thankfully they don’t seem to have been bleached.

Remember This

Summary: “As long as I remember you, you will never be lost to me. You will never be lost again.”

Characters: Kim Taehyung x Reader/You

Genre: Wedding Planner!AU, v angsty, as usual

A/N: im back from the dead! show this some love pls <3 requested by @myeonggu here

The rules for your job are fairly simple. There are only two.

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Splash of Color - Prologue

Chantilly Lace Chiffon… that is the incredibly long and complicated name I was blessed with, thanks to my mother and father. I never heard it in its full form very often though(only when I was in trouble) No. For as long as I can remember back, they just called me Lacey. I don’t remember much from my childhood sadly. The only clear memory I have from my young life is one of Peppermint Pier. That was the day of the accident. My mother says it was not my fault, but I know it was.

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The Lich's Haunt

The Lich’s Haunt

The crooked skeleton of the lich let out another shriek, cackling as it whirled up into the darkness of the chapel’s ceiling.  There was only so much that could be done against such a foe.  The holy water had been carelessly spent, and Gwalth’s great sword had been brutally beaten in the melee.  He had been warned by his companions that mundane tools would be of little use besides comfort, but Gwalth had failed to properly understand the threat.  Magic… he needed magic.

There was not much time until the lich swooped again.  The air had grown thick with darkness and deafening shrieks.  The shroud was difficult to pierce, but Gwalth knew where his salvation lay.  Now the lone survivor, he wasted no time in retracing his steps. 

A band of four had entered this chapel tonight with the purpose of extinguishing the vile being within: a twisted manifestation of shadows writhing around bones long rotten and bleached.  When they had been first contracted by Duke Rypus, their employer had described the lich as a once honourable man some two hundred years ago, but had fouled his mind with pursuits of immortality and then dominion.  It had been supposedly sealed, but was now loose, with reports of fifty-two deaths inside the last month.  Now it was fifty-five, and Gwalth would not allow it to become fifty-six.

He slowed his pace and stopped at the sight of a hand stretching out from behind a crumbling statue.  It belonged to Saltor, his body now lay twisted and lifeless on the cobbled stone; the Lich had spared no expense in tearing his throat out, having taken advantage of a shield arm weary from the relentless beating.  His plated armour now reflected rogue shards of light, scattering in the dark despite the new crimson streaks. 

“Sorry I dragged you into this, kid.”  Gwalth leaned down to rescue the kite shield Saltor had lugged in.  If the boy could see only see this, he would have had some quip for Gwalth finally taking his own protection seriously.  There was a brief smile that marked Gwalth’s scarred face, but it was irrelevant to the job at hand.

Pooled blood splashed beneath Gwalth’s hurried boots as he moved on. Cracks in the floor works left by Saltor’s iron sabatons directed him forwards.  He crossed Vina’s hand, lying in the middle of his path, recognisable by the golden rings adorning each of the fingers.  Those same crooked fingers which were curled in agony as though to escape.  Gwalth banished the thought of what might have happened to the rest of her, and ignored the spray of blood straying from his path that might answer the question, clenching his sword tighter.

Vina had deserved better.  They all had.

Gwalth could see the light of the full moon peeling away the darkness inside.  A beam shone onto Liul’s blackened husk as he raced towards it.  She had been the first to die tonight, wreathed in flames as soon as they had entered this accursed chapel.  The vision of flesh boiling and screaming surged in Gwalth’s mind. 

He forced all sense of remorse to one side, and focused on the fact that it had been the desire for gold much more than anything else which had bonded these four beings for just over a year now.  He hadn’t known his three companions well, truth be known. None of them had been with him when he first began work as a mercenary, and Gwalth had not considered staying in any form of contact with them after this job either.   

He hesitated over the sparse remains of his former companion.  Smoke was still rising off the thickened charcoal, mixing a foul smell in the air.  Cautiously, he started to fumble through what remained of her equipment and clothing for the only thing he could think to assist him.  

“Sorry I’m looting your corpse”, he whispered, as though he might provoke Liul’s regular sigh and look of displeasure at anything he had to say.  He fumbled around her remains.  “You know it’s not my style.  I just need a little help … Damn it! Where is it?!” 

Immolation always seemed like an unpleasant way to go in Gwalth’s eyes, and he was honestly sad for the loss of Liul, despite her being an imperious Elf.  But this?  This was downright inconvenient. 
The charred remains of her cloak offered no results as he struggled to remember what she had done with the Duke’s gift, given as a send-off for this mission.  It had adorned her neck when they set out from Tarl a week ago, but she had come to call it “too precious” soon after.  As if having it tucked away in her magical sleeves was useful in the heat of battle.

Realisation struck with a stupendous shout.  “Her sleeves!”

He grinned with relief as he reached for what was left of her arms.  “You may save me yet, Elf!” Yanking them off, he reached down Liul’s dainty sleeve.  Gwalth had never liked the sensation of extra-dimensional compartments.  They felt like fluid jelly, reaching, shifting and grabbing at whatever would probe inside them, but he needed to set aside any squeamish thoughts.  The magic had been explained to him before… 
“Just think of what you are looking for… Envision it in your mind…” 

Footsteps echoed from the black. 

“That’s new,” Gwalth murmured to himself.  Surely it had been flying earlier? Never mind that, he had to ignore the thought.  “Envision it quickly!” 
Something fell into his right hand as he whipped it out of the sleeve; he just prayed it was what he had wanted. 

He left his sword on the ground, gripping the shield firmly with the left hand and stood to face the darkness. The matter required a strong arm. 

“My name is Gwalth!  Of the House Temblin!  Son of Lord Gerard Temblin!” He bellowed as loud as his body would allow, clenching his hope in his right fist.  “And I refuse to yield before you Shade!”
“You think nobility will delay your demise?”  A hissing echo rattled forth, as a skeletal foot emerged from its obscuring shelter beyond the moonlight.  “Death has embraced your friends. Why should it spare you?” 

Gwalth smirked.  “I was never very good at following everyone else.”  At least he would die having the last word in the matter. 

The Lich hastened towards the lone figure, standing firm before the ruined structure.  He had not allowed the moment to check his hand for fear of breaking eye contact with the monster charging, but in that instant Gwalth channelled everything he had remaining into throwing whatever had fallen in his right hand against his foe.

The faintest glow flying forth from him let Gwalth know he had been lucky.  Raising his shield and turning his head away expectantly, he smiled to himself at the idea of a tiny bead such as that capable of achieving greater results than his great sword ever could.  

A second passed before Gwalth turned back in dismay.  He saw the bead bouncing into a roll on the ground as the lich continued advancing, and though he could see no lips, Gwalth could swear the Lich smiled.

Why didn’t it break?  He had thought that it was supposed to burst on contact… 

Gwalth remembered the bead being clasped around Liul’s neck by Duke Rypus himself, as they were setting off.  There were words to go with the bleached teeth in his smile, what were they? 

There was something about a temple?  That wasn’t relevant.

Something about bringing the judgement of Gods upon the victims?  Not helpful.

There was a word, a phrase…  The image of the Duke leaning in to whisper in Liul’s ear shot forth, stirring a bitter feeling of contempt in his stomach.

The Lich reached past Saltor’s shield to grab Gwalth’s throat, lifting him well into the air. 

Stupid Elves and wizards and priests, he thought, never trusting the rest of us with their secrets but still demanding we die defending them, or despite them.

“With your last words, puny human,” the hissing echo emerged from behind the skull’s moving jaw, “you will yield to me.” 

There wasn’t much breath left in his chest to snap something back.  But as long as there was breath, there was hope.

“Fuuuuhh…” The grip on Gwalth’s throat was too tight for even mediocre cursing.  To hell with it, he thought.

He released the shield from his left hand.  It made a solid clang as it hit the ground.  And with all speed and strength that he still possessed, Gwalth grabbed for the dagger on his belt and swung it up over his head before striking down on the skeletal arm holding him. 

The crunching of bone was as loud as the thud with which Gwalth landed on the ground.  Fear and panic was fuelling his adrenaline rush, as he scrambled forward and away from the looming figure.  His heart was thumping in his ears.

The gleaming target was easy to mark.  Little more than a metre ahead of him.  With dagger outstretched, Gwalth dove forward, landing the pommel squarely atop the bead.  It felt like he was trying to crush a pebble, like the bead was grinding the dagger down and not the other way. 

Gwalth peered over his should and could have sworn that he saw the faintest glimmer of panic from the Lich, as pealed white fingers grasped out at him.  With new determination and defiance, he gripped one hand firmly around the blade, clenching the other on the handle, and beat down on the bead in a final effort. 

Like the water breaking from a dam, the first crack was faint but all the same deafening.

The light was blinding. 






It was nine days before any soul dared to investigate the ruins of the old chapel, so far beyond the walls of Tarl.  When a farm hand finally worked up the nerve, he discovered the site obliterated.  He could find no bodies or remains, nor could he find any trace of the walls and ceiling that had so long stood in place. 

The four adventurers had not returned, nor sent any word.  And when Duke Rypus finally received word of the chapel he elected to spend the allotted reward on a grand funeral and to rebuild the chapel.