blamo!

BS Bending in TLOK

Watching The Legend of Korra is so disappointing in a lot of different ways. So if you ignore the plot, you’d expect at least some good action scenes with the effort and consistency from the old show. Ehhhh. The bending in LOK is strikingly idiotic and a degradation of the gem from the old show. Maybe if I weren’t comparing it to The Last Airbender, I wouldn’t mind it. But the fact it is so blatantly off from its predecessor makes for another highlight of Korra that I can’t un-see. From how elements are manipulated to even more complex shit with specific kinds of ~special people bending~, Korra, if I can put this politely, fucks everything up.

Right from the start you can tell that Korra definitely dumbed down the movements of the characters. It’s odd because the martial arts expert from Avatar worked on Korra as well. However, he only worked on 22 episodes of Korra, compare that with his 61 episodes guided in The Last Airbender. It’s probably a mix of Kisu’s lack of involvement, and an overall decision from the writers that maybe it wasn’t as important? Which is sad, because it really disassociates the audience from the complex spirituality and intricacies of the world. Styles benders seem to have spent years mastering are lost, and replaced with a modern, boxing type “PUNCH PUNCH PUNCH!!!” Hollywood action situation. Here’s some pretty (MS PAINT) pictures to do the talking for me.

And a bonus:

If the simplification of normal bending hasn’t gotten to you, there’s still a lot more I have to sift through. There’s so much shit pointing to how bending’s complexity was reduced for coooool moments. I’m even going to make nice little subheaders.

Lavabending 

So, in ATLA we see lavabending is a feat only the Avatars are capable of. Roku does it, Kyoshi does it. Avatar cool kids only. But then in Book Three, Bolin suddenly has the ability to lavabend at the tip of the hat. Which, by the way, is another thing stupidly prevalent throughout this series. Both Korra and Bolin in times of crisis suddenly have the ability to do things they couldn’t do, but really wished they could’ve. Hooow convenient.

So the discrepancy here is how Bolin can lavabend, and so can this random Earthbender guy, wouldn’t that mean all Earthbenders can? Metalbending makes sense, but lava is so hot it’s going to set stuff on fire. Technically, it counts as two elements, and has been confirmed as such by making it an Avatar-only thing in ATLA. But now these two random guys can just do this. Apparently it may even be easier than metalbending, which is also ridiculous. If lavabending is just bending the Earth to “go fast”, that’s a lot easier than metalbending because there’s more mass to bend. Just make it go zoom zoom and blamo everyone’s a lavabender.

Some people like to claim that because Bolin had an Earthbending dad and a Firebender mom, then that means he can control both elements to control lava. Which is dumb because then that would make him a fanfic-esque Dual Bender. And we really don’t need any of those. It’s never explained or justified, and is so different from the original show, it feels…sacrilegious. How dare you dishonor the lore. /s

BALD AIRBENDING MAN

What’s his name?

I don’t really care, because he’s dumb too. I feel like I don’t have to elaborate, though. It should be pretty obvious. ~Harmonic Converge~ (weird af plot device) gave him airbending, and because he studied it before and read a book by an Airbender Lady, he’s a master at it now. His powers are so innate, he worked so little to get to where he is. Hell, he didn’t work at all.

Unless you want me to believe that all his days in prison, he anticipated becoming an airbender and practiced all the moves beforehand. Granted, there are no official moves anymore. I’m sure he’s experienced in reckless punching. That’s all you need to bend, right?

If he can read a book and be great at airbending, why can’t Korra. Why didn’t Aang read THREE books to go defeat Ozai. Aang just should’ve read Earthbending for Dummies. Then he could bend the entire world off its axis. And This Bald Guy can jump off a cliff after quoting some “deep airbending lore” and he can FLY. Not even propelled by anything or even (AGAIN I REITERATE) moving his arms to BEND the currents around him. He’s not flying. He’s floating. And floating characters have always seemed like pretty bad animation, seriously. He looks like a late-stage yuri on ice character. Super out of place, and moving oddly across an undefined plane.

MAKO IN GENERAL

Mako does a couple things I’m not a big fan of. Ok, a lot of things. But in terms of bending, I have a few choice picks.

In Legend of Korra, lightning and its redirection has a lot less of an impact. Being electrocuted no longer hurts anyone unless the writers want us to feel bad for a character being hurt (usually Korra). But half of the time, it’s just there to look really COOL and not really do anything. This is proven by two things. Mako shoots lightning right on Amon at point blank, and Amon isn’t affected. The same is true for Mako. He HOLDS ON to the lightning and ISN’T AFFECTED AT ALL. Let me make another ATLA/LOK comparison.

Zuko: Tries to redirect lightning, gaurding his torso so hopefully it doesn’t hit him. In the end it does and he’s pretty much out of the fight.

Mako: Doesn’t even really care if he’s hit by the lightning at all. He holds on to it for a good few seconds, because it’s not like electrocution hurts or anything. Only after getting a REFRESHING SHOCK for a good bit does he decide to toss it back at the Robo Man.

Maybe this would make sense because Mako is supposed to be a cool, all-powerful Firebender. But then even that theory breaks down, because he can withstand the strongest forms of raw fuckin’ Bending Power from all elements, apparently.

He does another of these dumb moves when he’s being bloodbended by Amon. We see Amon being bloodbended, but he escapes the grip, and the audience assumes it’s because he’s a bloodbender. But then suddenly MAKO CAN DO IT TOO. What a great guy.

Also Amon’s fine from this shock as well. And this kind of encompasses everything I’ve touched on. There’s Amon bending without moving, Mako having unrealistic powers never touched on before, and powers that are nerfed to all hell just to add ~drama~ in replace of actual sense.

TL;DR: LOK’s bending is saturated action filler written in for wish fulfillment, sacrifices old techniques and inner consistency for cool looking moves and scenarios, and shows a disappointing lack of passion or misunderstanding of the source material

anonymous asked:

May I request Lance bragging about how amazing and talented his s/o is to everyone to the point where his s/o is a blushing mess?

The gladiator was down for maybe ten seconds before Lance was running across the training space. You were still, eyes closed and breathing heavily, so you didn’t notice him until you were swept up into a hug. His crow of victory covered up any surprised noise that you made. 

“That was amazing!” He turned his head to look at the rest of the paladins right. “You all saw that, right? They were all zip and phooosh and ka-blamo! They took it down, no help required.”

“Lance, that’s not exactly true-”

“Shhhh-” He pressed a finger to your lips. “Don’t sell yourself short, we all know the truth.”

Thing’s I actually say now because of The Lonely Island
  • ka-blamo
  • im not a part of your system
  • IM AN ADULT
  • like a boss
  • excuse-i
  • well there you have it
  • me likely dat
  • Best picture, must be doing something right 
  • Mona Lisa, the original basic bitch
  • costco samples like a mother fucker
  • imma smash
  • im just trying to make water
  • Kevin: You can’t give up control. You’re terrible at taking your primary’s orders. You just do whatever you want. I could go on and on and on.
  • Neil: Something no lover of yours has ever said.
  • Thea: Blamo.

you and tattoo artist!boyfriend!calum laying on your bed in the middle of the night super close to you, calum not being able to sleep bc he is super stressed bc he needs to think of a new design for his boss and as you are dozing off, he starts drawing teeny tiny shapes on your back with his fingers and as you’re chest about to fall asleep you feel calum get up out of your bed and walk over to the shelf where his paints are on, he kneels on the bed and whisper’s “baby can you lay on your stomach, i have an idea” although it was 3am, when calum’s artistic inspiration strikes you have to let it go. you rolled into your stomach and calum kissed your head and said “thank you.”
mixing together his paints, calum lifted up the back of your shirt, drawing the first line of paint onto your back causing you to shiver a little. he continued painting til the sun went up, only falling asleep after his masterpiece was finished.
you woke up to a freshly painted back, and a painted up calum fast asleep next to you on your bed. you kissed his forehead letting your little artist sleep, heading to the mirror to check out the beautiful masterpiece calum created overnight.

requested by: @abby-blamo

i was literally always going to make this post

all right, cats and kittens, i’m asoiaf-auing hamilton.  it is asoiaf more than got bc honestly hamilton works way better as a war of the conquest au than it does a game of thrones-era au.  kinda?  let’s pretend.  just breathe and go with me friends.

  • hamilton is a bastard, orphan, son of a whore and a…valyrian.  he’s basically orys baratheon, the right hand man of washington’s “aegon targaryen” during the war of the conquest.  people whisper about him being washington’s son, but he’s not.  lbr here, “ours is the fury” as house words that he adopts from argilac durrandon philip schuyler when he marries one of his daughters is tha realest.  
    • can we just: angelica “you will never be satisfied, god i hope you’re satisifed” as an “ours is the fury” moment
    • “you forfeit the rights to my heart, you forfeit the place in our bed, you’ll sleep in your office instead” hell yeah that’s some “ours is the fury” shit right there too.
  • king george is probably like….mern ix gardener or some shit.  gets ousted in the field of fire.  or sth like that, and replaced with someone new…like thomas jefferson “tyrell” “growing strong” in the chivalry capital of westeros–aka the reach.
  • aaron burr is super “winter is coming” stark over here.  he’s like torrhen stark–waits for it to see how the battle will go then kneels instead of fighting and is rewarded for it.  old blood, has a legacy to protect, wants to maintain his power and not disappoint anyone, but also isn’t stupid af and fighting dragons and shit.  
    • me: quietly has feels about the baratheon/stark historical frandship that goes to shit kinda but also not, so too do we have “i’ve always considered you a friend” “i don’t see why that has to end” at some point later
  • can lafayette be the equivalent of visenya targaryen?  k and thanks.  good talk.  guns and ships i mean fire and blood.
  • which i think makes laurens more like the rhaenys of the team which makes sense given that rhaenys dies young and in dorne after the war is over but the fighting’s not done because dorne i’m not crying you’re crying.  
    • also hams and laurens are both there for being reliable with the ladies i mean taking storm’s end as orys baratheon and rhaenys targaryen did.  
    • also i think it possible that orys and rhaenys moved undercover and moved as one banged on that campaign, you smell what i’m steppin’ in.
  • and, of course, HERCULES MULLIGAN NEEDS NO INTRODUCTION and as far as i know has no good equivalent so let’s insert him as a cool spy somewhere.  it’s kinda disappointing that that’s true, but let’s say that the best spies are the ones no one can pin down, and that was certainly true of mulligan.  let’s say he’s washington’s master of whispers when washington melts down everyone’s muskets swords and makes the new iron throne (and i cry because if only they had a constitution or a magna carta or some shit in westeros life would be a lot better but womp womp what is rule of law even?)
  • end act i “WE WON WE WON WE WON THE WORLD TUNRED UPSIDE DOWN” and 7 kingdoms that had literally 8,000 years of history of not being unified got unified bc washington’s the shit and history has it’s eyes on you.
  • act ii: hokay so we don’t have a constitution which changes a lot of shit. i guess jon adams becomes hand of the king bc vp?? womp womp sorry hams/orys you aren’t going to be it.  you get to be master of coin, and sure, for the hell of it, you can try to start westeros’ bank un deux trois quatre cinq BRAVO.  
  • in terms of small council: 
    • madison–master of laws–who i see as a very varys-like figure–at least as far as he’s depicted in hamilton  bc he’s very “power behind the throne” kind of power and manipulates others to do shit for him like
    • tj–master of ships i guess??–all about defending that southron way of life/thinking the south is better at shit when lolnope it’s not
    • hams–master of coin–bc yep.
    • burr tryin’ hard to get himself on the council (in a vaguely uncharacteristic way for house stark, but hey, we’re continuing with this shit)
    • the throwdowns are epic
    • throwdown topics include
      • the creation of a national bank (you can totally see them not wanting to rely on lannister gold. who’re the lannisters in this au?  i feel like some other southern motherfuckin’ democratic republican who would bro out with tj.  maybe madison?  heck.  madison.  problem solved.)
      • the creation of a kingsguard
      • rule of law?? why would you?? do that??
      • puttin’ down rebellions and shit
      • engaging in wars across the sea like in the disputed lands and shit
  • not sure how the transition of power works bc it should be hereditary–but washington has no kids.  maybe hams angles for power and there are more rumors that he’s washington’s son (”i’m not your son”) and then there’s the reynolds pamphlet and he picks against burr and then they duel and blamo hams doesn’t put up a fight bc of principles some weird westerosi honor and he dies and his sons rule storm’s end and eliza tells his story.

“Blammo! Another successful interaction with a man!”

I just went to the market to buy some food for dinner where I had a Liz Lemon interaction with the cute checker.

Checker: Hey, how are you today?

Me: I’m Good, how are you?

Checker: ALRIGHTY! (Awkward pause) I, I, I mean I’m alright… I’m not alrighty

Me: bah hurhurhur - awkward laugh 

I then look around so I wont make a googly face

Checker: Why are you looking so suspicious?

Me: Hahaha um um I don’t know.

He then hands me my bag and we awkwardly touch hands too long.