blame it on the t t t t t tumblr

does anyone else think about how fandoms are like cities?

you got your big, bustling ones that are really diverse and busy, maybe a little hard to navigate and full of crime, good areas and bad areas. the locals know the hot spots and how to get around

then the mid-range towns with big city attitudes even though they’re not big cities, a few local hubs of activity, the crazy dude ranting about stuff on the street corner who makes people uncomfortable

and then the small spot towns where everybody knows everybody, you can’t go out without seeing somebody you know, and there’s only one grocery store

reminder

if someone blatantly & continuously disrespects your values, they don’t love you.

if someone is making excuses & not being straightforward with you, they don’t love you.

if they constantly assign the blame to you when there is conflict (no matter how small), they don’t love you.

if you have to remind someone to treat you with kindness or to pay attention to you, they don’t love you.

if they are emotionally manipulative or belligerent, they don’t love you.

if they say “you’re just like the others” or “i thought you were different”, they don’t love you.

same for “well, i thought you loved me.”

if they belittle your feelings, goals, & ideas, they don’t love you.

if they expect you to make all the concessions & sacrifices, they don’t love you.

if they breach your established boundaries, they don’t love you.

if they don’t acknowledge your desires or interests, they don’t love you.

there are people in this world that will lie. there are people in this world that will fall short. don’t blame yourself.

it’s not your fault that their love is a currency. it’s not your fault that they were deceptive. it’s not your fault that you believed.

it’s not your fault.


Kim Kardashian’s ass didn’t wreck the world.
Didn’t impoverish nations or deport my neighbor’s mom.
Didn’t let Brock Turner off with a slap on the wrist,
Or bring Burger King to someone
Who shot a woman in prayer.
Her ass didn’t blow any whistles or involve the Russians or ban
The House on Mango Street in public schools.
If you’re looking where to blame,
I see supremacy painted as normalcy,
I see news brought to you by the number 14-
Didn’t Big Bird ever tell you about the letter K?
Not for Kim.
Or for Khloe.
Not for Kourtney, either.
But for the three striped steps up the White House stairs,
Knocking. Knocking. Knocking.
Never letting their bruises heal.
—  Contrary to Popular Belief, We Opened This Door
I used to think it was all my fault, I blamed myself for everything, every argument, every mistake, every tear shed. I uzed to think maybe it was me, maybe I am a bad person, maybe I really don’t deserve you. I came to realise that it wasn’t always my fault, that I wasn’t the only one who made mistakes, that I wasn’t responsible for every argument. It was a ‘we’ thing not a 'me’ thing, a relationship requirea efforts from both people involved not just one.
—  t.i // it was a ‘we’ thing not a 'me’ thing.

so anyway i just went on yet another aphobe-blocking spree and i just want to remind all of y’all that… you’re allowed to do that. you’re allowed to block ppl, and you’re allowed to pre-emptively block ppl, and you should pre-emptively block ppl who make you feel unsafe, who wear their hatred as a badge of pride, or who are just assholes. you don’t have to wait for them to hurt you first.

ppl love to say that you shouldn’t be on tumblr if you can’t take the heat, but that’s bully rhetoric. existing on a public space doesn’t give ppl a free pass to insult, harass or threaten you. talking about your experiences on a public space doesn’t give ppl a free pass to gaslight you. claiming otherwise is victim blaming, plain and simple.

furthermore: self-advocacy doesn’t mean you have to personnally engage with every bigoted asshole on this hellsite. it’s okay to pick your battles. it’s okay to pick no battles at all. refusing to argue with ppl isn’t letting them win b/c your right to exist unharrassed is not up for debate.

you don’t owe bigots anything. you don’t owe bullies anything. not a chance to spew vitriol at you, not your time, nothing. block liberally and take care of yourself.

Dear white people

You don’t need to feel bad for something your ancestors may or may not have done.

You don’t need to apologize for being white.

You aren’t ugly because you’re white.

You aren’t a bad person because you are white.

You are allowed to be proud of your heritage or culture.

You don’t automatically have privilege just because you’re white.

You do not need to beat yourself up because you’re white.

You don’t need to feel guilty because you’re white.

You shouldn’t be told to kill yourself just because you’re white.

People can be racist to you despite being white.

You aren’t automatically racist just because you’re white.

Black tumblr and society loves to tell you that you’re worth less, you’re pathetic, you’re to blame for slavery, you have no culture, that you are a piece of shit just because of your skin colour. White people that just isn’t true. Your skin colour doesn’t make you any less of a person and anyone who tells you other wise is the one who is hateful, ugly, a bad person, and above all, a god damned racist.

I just had a thought. How does tumblr get away with making the required age 13+ while also allowing pornographic and sexually explicit images? Safe search?? Is that the weak barrier that protects them so they can get away with it? While I’m not taking any blame off of kinksters and porn blogs that don’t mark their blog NSFW and use sfw tags and just generally put their content where it doesn’t belong, there’s a colossal amount of fault on tumblr’s end too.
Any website that has a user base including people under the age of 18 aren’t supposed to allow pornographic material, whether it be explicit images or video. That’s why facebook doesn’t. That’s why twitter doesn’t. That’s why instagram doesn’t. And yeah, while they may not do the best job of keeping this type of content off their sites in the first place, at least the option is there to report it to have it removed. Whereas on tumblr you can’t report sexually explicit images, they say there’s nothing they can do about it unless it’s a video and “hey have you tried safesearch? it’s a cool feature to keep these images away!” Trust me, I’ve tried, and that’s their response. And safesearch isn’t full proof so that’s laughable. Not to mention they’re putting a lot of hopes in the hands of these people running these blogs to mark their blogs as NSFW in the first place.
I’m really just curious. How does tumblr get away with that. I’d really like to know, sounds like shit lazy website management to me.

Do you even care that we don’t talk anymore?
Do you even mind not knowing how I am?
Are you not the slightest bit curious?
I won’t say I can’t blame you.
I won’t say I saw this coming.
I didn’t.
I didn’t because you told me this would never happen.
You promised me more.
You said you wouldn’t leave.
So, no, it was not foolish of me to think that I wasn’t going to lose you.
It was cruel of you to say I wouldn’t when you didn’t mean it.
Because at the drop of a hat you were gone.
No warning, no words, nothing at all.
You left me wondering what the hell I did wrong.
But it wasn’t me; it was you.
Acting like you gave a damn about me
Until something better came around.
And I hate that I still think about you.
Every bit of me wants to be done.
Every part of me wishes that I didn’t care
Yet I still wonder.
How could you let this happen to us?
I thought you cared.
I’ll never know why I was no longer enough.
I’ll be afraid the next time someone tells me they love me.
I’ll be terrified that one day they will look at me just like you did, and decide that I wasn’t worth loving anymore.
That’s the worst part.
—  d.e.

brokenbutbright  asked:

Hey, I was hoping you could give me a bit of context for the new Charlie Hebdo cartoon? Or direct me to someone who wouldn't mind? The anglosphere is reacting really badly to it, but when I first saw it I thought, "oh, they're saying they don't blame Muslims for the attacks. they're trying to fend off the islamophobia." But it's hard to get any opinion out of US articles that isn't "look! they drew mohammed again! islamophobes!"

Hi! Thank you so much for asking! Thank you for being polite and curious. It doesn’t matter if, despite our explanations, you don’t agree with the french side of tumblr, you’re fully entitled of your freedom of thought. I’m just happy of your interest in what we have to say.

About our culture of satire (and why CH isn’t racist) : 1- 2 - 3 - 4 - 5 - 6 - 7 - 8 

Here’s a huge post that covers a lot of things

Why we are not using the “race” concept

Nobody’s blaming the Muslims (but there are an awful lot of attacks on mosques since last week and we are very ashamed and upset by that. But neither us, the french side of Tumblr, or the medias, are blaming anybody else but the terrorists)

Lassana Bathily (this has nothing to do with social justice, but the guy is a hero, you should know about him)

Here’s what we wrote on signs for the rally and what is now broadcast in Paris

Satire being used about the Charlie Hebdo events

My opinion about imperialism on Tumblr and SJW over the last few days

How we feel about Tumblr’s reaction 


There’s another point that I haven’t seen explained in english so far: French people love to talk and argue about absolutely everything. All the time. Sometimes, it’s annoying, but we love it, and we (almost) alway learn something form the debate. Maybe that comes from the Enlightenment age, I’m not sure, but nothing is to sacred that it can’t be discussed. So, of course, we also talk about religion. That culture of discussing religion is helped by two facts: we are a secular country, which mean our State won’t interfere in any way about religion. And since 1881, we don’t have a blasphemy law (and every religious representatives are happy about that). So as we grew up in a place where the State (or our society) won’t punish us for talking and having an opinion about religions. We’re talking about it as we do about any political party. I guess you could say that to us, religion is just a line of thought. But since we’re discussing it as we’re discussing everything else, we don’t feel like we’re attacking anyone when we’re criticizing a religion. 

As for Charlie Hebdo, they were being as harsh on Catholicism and Judaism than they are about Islam. Really, they were making no exception. During the 90’s they were fustigating a lot on catholicism because of the pedophile priests scandal. But make no mistake: they are atheists, but they are defending everybody’s right to believe in what they want. With one exception: fundamentalists. Fanatics from any religion.
And they were working for people to understand that terrorism has no religion.

As for the drawings of Mohammed, I made a post in french about blasphemy, someone said they would translate it, I’l send it to you if you’re still interested. 

Those cartoonists were working for peace. They were working to end fanatism, rascism, homophobia, stupidity. They were making fun about everybody, french people as well as foreigners. They were mocking every religion, every single one.

We have laws to protect people from any kind of discrimination, Charlie had to go to trial 50 times since 1992, that’s one time every six months
On 12 occasions, they were up against nationalists. On 8 occasions, it was against catholics. And on 6 occasions, against muslims organisations. 

Those who were unhappy with Charlie’s publications had the legal means to be heard, and they used it. 75% of the time, Charlie Hebdo was declare not guilty. They were convicted 9 times on 48 trials. And never for their comment on a religion. Moslty it was because they insulted someone.

They just wanted to make us laugh and think about ideas we take for granted, or about the news. The only people who won’t allow that are fanatics. Humour is a part of freedom of thoughts. If you don’t use your freedom, you’ll lose it. Charlie Hebdo were making the most of it.

I’m sorry if I’m being confusing with all those links and my ill-written explanation. And I’m not sure I’ve help you understand about the cartoons, so I’ll ask other French people to help you, if you don’t mind. Please ask any question who might have! :)

Again, thank you so much for being so open minded since it all started. It means a lot. 

one of the things about the classical music community that we feel should change is the whole attitude toward clapping between movements.
the people who clap between movements may not know about “proper” concert etiquette, but they’re only trying to show appreciation for the performance, and isn’t that a good thing? don’t get me wrong, i still think etiquette is important - for example, people whispering or being noisy in general while there’s a performance going on is definitely one of my pet peeves.

however, i think clapping between movements doesn’t detract from the experience as a whole and so we honestly shouldn’t have such a harsh attitude toward it. heck, i didn’t even know that clapping between movements wasn’t supposed to be a thing before i joined classical music tumblr, and i’m sure i’ve done it more than a few times.
and anyway, i can’t say that i really blame them for clapping. so many movements of pieces can pretty much be played as a separate piece on their own and can sound like such too, and clapping between them is honestly understandable.

i think that instead of shunning the people who clap between movements for doing so, we should instead make an effort to educate them, and definitely not in an aggressive way like the attitudes i’ve so often seen have implied. i know that i, at least, would be really pissed if someone yelled at me for clapping between movements when i didn’t even know that i wasn’t supposed to do that - and this kind of thing is what pushes people away from classical music. it reinforces the idea that classical musicians are a bunch of elitist snobs who need to get off our high horses, and isn’t that an image we want to get rid of?
this isn’t even just about clapping between movements anymore - it’s a thing about elitism in the classical music community in general. i so often see people complaining about how classical music isn’t popular enough nor appreciated enough, and i definitely agree, but what irks me is the way some of these same people have elitist attitudes and don’t make an effort to change that - things like this are part of the larger problem of elitism and there are more important issues to focus on than just people making noise with their hands when the performers aren’t playing, but i digress. (i digress a lot.)
i actually have a lot more to say, but i am going to stop soon for fear of losing more of you.

tl;dr clapping between movements is okay and understandable and we shouldn’t make such a big deal of it, it contributes to elitism and there are bigger issues to be angry about.

- mod chopin, the bringer of salt

sinaru  asked:

About FFXV anon, I think it's even part of tumblr's community guidelines that there should be no necessary negativity in tags that are supposed to be uplifting, so I can kinda understand the frustration when people want to read positive stuff and then hit a wall of criticism they didn't sign up for. You can't really blame people for wanting to feel good about their fandom (especially when they might go through shit in rl). Doesn't justify the hate anons, but try to be more considerate, ok?

Like most humans here I haven’t thoroughly read tumblr’s community guidelines but I highly doubt that the purpose for tags is only ~*~ pOsItIvY & lOvE & rAiiBowS~*~. Tags are used to tag a post which is related to the thing you’re posting whether it’s a video, lyrics, art, OPINIONS, etc.

Who ever said tags are only for positive opinions? Aren’t we allowed to speak our minds if we don’t like / agree with something?. Sorry to say but that’s just delusional.

Looks like you’re all very affected by my opinions on your based god videogame telling me how I’m a hater then you’re totally fine with going here and sending me literal death threats lmao. Please make some sense.

This is basically the same with every fandom (if you’ve stuck with me long enough you know totally what I’m talking about lmao) so I’m not expecting much.

The only advice I can give is that you either grow up and deal with the fact that we all have different opinions or else if you don’t wanna see any negative thing regarding your beloved game go and make a new tag for FFXV POSITIVISM!111!!!

Sorry to say, but you don’t own the tag.

It’s almost four in the morning and I miss your voice. The tears won’t stop coming. The memories won’t stop replaying. God, look at what you’ve done to me. I can’t sleep. I can’t move on. I don’t know how to accept, you know. You always knew that it was one of my major flaws, that I could never accept change or adjust so easily. I hate that I blame you, but I also thank you at the same time. Because of you, I have realized how much I need to work on that flaw, because it leaves you in pain. Not learning to accept things leaves you hurting the most. So I’ll work on that, I promise. But right now, I feel too heartbroken and too small to even try.
when ppl ask u to either delete their post or reblog it with the original caption
  1. this is my blog and not yours oops
  2. i’m on vacation, i’m hardly online, i don’t even have a computer right now
  3. the person i reblogged it from had no caption on it, all i did was hit the reblog button
  4. i don’t have time to go through all 250 posts i reblog a day just to find their original captions, esp. when i can’t even find the source!
  5. i just reblog things as they come. the only thing i would delete are self promotions or when i do queues, some people put their ratchet sponsor links in posts like wtf

the harsh reality: this is tumblr, people will reblog the hell out of your posts, some might clear your captions, some might self promote, don’t get butthurt over it. 

if you have over 1000 notes on a picture, chances are this has happened to you. pls don’t be a dick and message one person, blaming it on them, when u know they’re not the only ones (particularly if they didn’t even clear your captions, they reblogged it when there was no caption anyways!!)

I don’t want to be the ex you tell the next guy about.
I don’t want to be the name you accidently shout.
I don’t want to be the face you fail to recall as he runs his hands over your skin.
I don’t want to be the one to blame for you never letting anyone in.
Don’t let me become an object of hate whenever you hear our song.
I don’t want you to start thinking that being the luckiest is wrong.
We both know this is right.
I don’t want you to ever stop making wishes at 11:11, just because it makes you think of me.
Don’t let me become a part of your past, a footnote in your history.

I’m drinking in the rain, too wet to notice I’m drowning.
The whisky’s cold but my throat is burning.
I spent the last month digging holes in the churchyard,
to hide all the pain we’ve borne and shared in the soft earth.
To lay to rest the terrors of our tears.
Your fingers grab me like a gravestone.
The silence haunts me like a shadow.
I just want to fill the dead air between our words with ‘forever.’
I want to help you bury the memories of men that meant nothing but ‘maybe.’
I want to make you believe in ‘truly.’

I know there’s a hint of hurt in my mouth,
a faint taste of failure on my tongue.
But there’s still an aching need for your kiss.
There’s still our love, and our promise.

—  giraffevaderI guess I’m just asking for another chance

so darren finally snapped at someone who called mia something horrible and we’re all pleased with this? happy that he is acknowledging the awful? like, finally darren has realized that this happens? I mean, yeah they deserve to be smacked down but I sincerely doubt darren saying something will achieve that. 

People have this weird idea that he doesn’t know it happens but he does. We put up with atrocious behavior because we argue that as long as he doesn’t hear about it… It’s all over twitter! And tumblr! And we can say he shouldn’t look for it but that’s the weirdest version of victim blaming I’ve ever heard. People threaten and talk shit about his girlfriend all over the place and say it’s ok as long as they don’t say it to his face? what the fuck people? I am so done with crisscolfer shippers, and just general mia-haters. I don’t give a shit if you keep it online, or to yourselves. that’s bullshit, he knows, and you are trash and need to be put in a box and left there. 

At the Alan Cumming thing Mia and Darren’s family sat behind me and some trashbags sat in front of me. I won’t talk about their generally crappy behavior (oh wait, I will: talking, phones out, feet on chairs) but I heard them talking shit about Mia. People sitting in front of them that I knew heard them talking trash about Mia. You could guess the were talking crap about Mia because of their faces and the way they kept looking at her. 

newsflash, if I could work it out, so can she and it is a marvel that she doesn’t let it get to her more! And that darren doesn’t. 

These people are literal crap and Darren is done and I am done. 

I’ll say it again: You can be jealous of Mia. Natural human reaction. She’s with a guy everyone here is crushing on. And also she’s beautiful and funny and talented and has stuff and shit. By all means be jealous. And then be a fucking adult and recognise that emotion and get the fuck over it. You fucking trash bags. 

It’s 6am and NY is my city now (I’m totes like daredevil) and if you go around talking trash expect trash to come flying back at you. 

I feel like I failed people.

I’m sorry if I’ve ever hurt anyone’s feelings by not responding to their messages, but the truth is, past a certain point it’s just not possible for anyone to respond to everything. 

I want to spend my life helping people and speaking about body image, but one of the things I’ve struggled with in the past few months is feeling responsible for other people. I’ve gotten angry messages on Tumblr and on Facebook from people who blame me for them hating themselves or being depressed because I didn’t make time to talk to them.

And like.. I want to help, but I’m just a fucking guy. It isn’t right to direct your anger and frustration outward because someone you don’t know wasn’t able to be there for you. You don’t know their situation or what is going on on their end, as much as I try and read all my messages there’s got to be at least a dozen a day that I just don’t see, and I rarely have the time to go back and comb through old ones.

If it means that you’ll hate me, hate me. It’s fine, and I’ve gotten a lot of it before. But I’m a 22 year old dude. I’ll do everything I can, but you can’t make me personally responsible for your difficulties.

I’m sorry.

PSA

If you want hateful anons off your back for posting your opinion on your blog, but tumblr’s search is so bad that it picks up and you have anons blaming you for tagging your hate when you didn’t.

Then I suggest turning off ‘Allow this blog to appear in search results’ in your settings so you don’t have to do t/h/is whenever you’re talking about something. And you don’t have pesky anons messaging you and sending anon hate

Please spread this! I’ve seen so many people get blamed for tagging their hate when they didn’t. It’s that tumblr’s search system picks up everything.