Over the past 9 ½ months or so, I can honestly say that this is the worse time period of my entire 20 years thus far. And as of late ive been feeling so down for the longest that I start to question whether or not people even care to stop what theyre doing, just to see how my day is…I could seriously tell you know that there is only one or two people that actually gives a shit about me as of now. All of these so called “friends” from highschool that dont even talk to me anymore have all faded away from my life ever since i graduated from military school, and when i finally returned home i felt so alienated that people didnt even care to hang out with me… I just feel so alone that its hard for me to even make new friends in person rather than on tumblr or on other social media that 9/10 i probably wont get to meet because theyre like 100 miles away. Not to mention the feeling that id never again get to enjoy the feeling of somebody wanting to be with me and liking me for who i am as a person after 9 long months. As a 5'7black male whos working and making ends meet at a fast food restaurant, struggling with school, and also struggling with depression with suicidal thoughts every other day, I just cant help to think, “how long do I have, before I break and taking the risk of ending it all?”.