If Michael could tell his younger self one thing, anything, it’d be don’t tell him.
He’d explain that there are a thousand ways for a heart to break and Jeremy Heere will make you learn all of them, starting with oh god, Michael, I’m so sorry. That some love songs are never meant to be sung, that some truths are better off buried six feet under. That the relief of finally saying it out loud is not worth everything that comes afterwards.
If Michael could, he’d tell his younger self everything. How one ugly truth took root in the garden of their friendship and overtook the soil, strangling their happy memories and drying out their intimacies and filling the land with bitter weeds. How their relationship turned into a rotten wasteland, full of landmines and skeletons, so toxic that Michael no longer remembers what it’s like to breathe without pain. How the best thing in Michael’s life turned into knives in his back. How love disfigured itself into hate and fury and wishing he were dead.
He’d say that he regrets it, all of it. That he’d take it all back, if he could.
(If Michael could tell his younger self one thing, anything, it’d actually be don’t fall in love with him.
But some things just can’t be stopped.)