birth of a notion

anonymous asked:

Who originally thought about bombing and shooting up Columbine, Eric or Dylan?

We don’t really know. We don’t know how that conversation first began or who initiated the idea. However, we can guess.

In November 1997, Dylan writes “[redacted] will get me a gun, I’ll go on my killing spree against anyone I want”. It’s the first mention we have of murder (and, more importantly, of a killing spree) after he already mentioned suicide more than once in the previous entries. One of those suicide-entries also has him reflecting on [redacted] getting him a gun so Dylan can use that gun on himself. What’s interesting is that this gun provider was not Eric, as Eric’s name remains unredacted throughout the evidence. Dylan’s first reference to NBK happens in February 1998, but the person he names as wanting to do that with is also redacted.

Eric didn’t start his journal until April 1998. In its third entry (still within that same month), he writes “ when I go NBK”. The choice of words here – when instead of if – shows that the idea had already taken shape prior to the entry and that Eric was already treating it as something definite. There is more murder-related stuff on his website, though no direct references to NBK the way he mentions it in his journal, but none of those entries were dated (though they’re likely to be from the 1997-1998 era).

Note that both of these entries are still individualistic: they talk about a killing spree/NBK as something they’re going to do alone. Dylan first writes of going NBK with Eric in January 1999. He didn’t sound too happy about it and many have speculated that this wasn’t his first choice. Eric, on his part, writes “when we go NBK” in October 1998 and mentions Dylan later on in that same entry in connection with these plans.

Logically speaking, we could say the following:

  • The idea of a killing spree was born a little before Dylan’s earliest mention of it in November 1997. I’d tentatively put mid-1997 as the initial birth of the idea.
  • By February 1998, Dylan mentions going NBK with someone else. He’s already moved forward into not wanting to do this alone.
  • Eric first mentions going NBK as a solitary idea in April 1998 – something for him to do alone.
  • What’s interesting here is that they both use the same terminology for the idea: both use the codename NBK for this. That would suggest that they spoke about the notion with each other, probably in conjunction with the movie they both liked, some time in early 1998.
  • By October 1998, Eric is already convinced that he’s going to do this together with Dylan.
  • November 1998 sees them acquiring the guns.
  • By January 1999 Dylan acknowledges the plan and says “maybe going “NBK” (gawd) with Eric is the way to break free”. Dylan is still treating it as an option instead of as a definite at this point.

Who originally thought about it? The evidence suggests that it was Dylan who first came up with the idea of going on a killing spree, but we don’t have any dated writing by Eric from that time. That makes it hard to know what was going on in the latter’s head at the time Dylan first wrote about the killing spree. However, it’s very clear that the two really came together on the idea between April and October 1998, though Dylan already knew he wasn’t going to go through with it alone as early as February 1998. I have no doubt that mid-1998 saw the actual birth of NBK as we now know it: Dylan’s notion of a killing spree with guns combined with Eric’s love of explosives in those months and that’s when the idea of bombing the school and shooting the survivors/first responders came into being as a definite sort of plan. It’s likely that they spoke of the idea among themselves earlier on than that, too, but I personally think that it didn’t really come into definite being prior to those months because Eric still mentions lone-wolfing the whole thing as late as April 1998.

Many outlanders, even that of Dunmeri birth, seem to not understand our notion of the after life. We do not go to Aetherius like the Divine worshipers, we do not become one with the earth like our Bosmeri-cousins, we do not join with the Hist like the scale-backs of the southern swamps, we do not go to the sugar-palaces of Secunda like the Khajiit, we do not go to a mead palace like Sovngarde or the Far Shores of the Yokudans. Even our way to our resting place is different from the other races, our way to Heaven is guided by Saint Veloth for it is only fitting that the race that descends from pilgrims commit one last pilgrimage to our final rest.
One common misconception is that Necrom, or the City of the Dead, that exists under the City of Above is our heaven, is it not. Think of it like a trade ship from Port Telvannis to Tears, we leave Port Telvannis but we are not obligated to stay in Tears. Saint Veloth is our ship-master to Necrom but from Necrom our spirits can go anywhere and always return. Necrom is the port that connects to multiple destinations, some may be to our ancestral tombs, our descendants or gateways to the realms of our gods, the reclamationists Azura, Boethiah and Mephala.
Why would we return to Tamriel? The ignorant outlander asks and our answer is always simple, family. Family for us is the most important thing, even in death our clan-bounds are strong and even in death we must protect our family from those who try to harm them. Our ancestors are our guides in life and in death, they travel to aid us, they travel to save us, they travel to protect us. The Clan-bound Pilgrims is the best description of our dead for all Dunmer spirits are pilgrims.
How are the Dunmer spirits able to go to the Daedric realms? The outlanders ask, it’s quite simple. Necrom was originally Saint Nerevar’s tomb, his last destination if you will. On that holy site we built our resting places, our eternal homes and our gods, glorious as they are, granted us the ultimate gift. The gift of entrance to move throughout their realms and back home whenever we please. Though the way is blocked for mortals our spirits can see and pass through the gates of Moonshadow, Snake Mount and the webspinner’s numerous realms that rest on her webs.
No matter what death befalls our kin may they always know that the halls and streets of Necrom will always open their doors for them.
Hail the Reclamationists, the Saints that guide us and our honored ancestors.

A Dunmer’s View on Death
A understanding of the next life
By Curate Sedris Arendu of the Necrom shrine of Saint Veloth
Permission given by the council of Indoril and the Patriarchs of the Temple

(Written by our writer Cider over on Dark Creations)

Lilly Pulitzer is preppy. It is part of a preppy uniform that announces itself from fifty paces. It is not so much a declaration of wealth as it is a perceived statement about class, lineage and attitude… Lilly Pulitzer suggests an advantage of birth. The clothes stir up scrapbook notions of ancient family trees, summer compounds, boarding school uniforms and large, granite buildings inscribed with great-great-grandfather’s name.
The clothes are, upon close inspection, not so terribly attractive. Actually, they are rather unattractive. And that is part of their charm. They are not meant to be stylish — that’s so nouveau. The clothes are clubby. Country clubby. One-percent-ish.
#332. I do not appreciate it when people tell me I should look past the fact that my beginnings were how they were. It’s easy for them to say the obvious, “It is what it is”, “You can’t change the past”, “You shouldn’t let it hold you back”…Those not adopted will never know what it’s like to be told as a young child you were abandoned at birth, with no clues. And then you’re given the reality of infant abandonment and coercion in your birth country. Try coping with that notion throughout your life, it can be challenging sometimes. I know it’s all relative, but you’d be grieving and mourning in different ways for this indescribable loss too, I think. Everyone’s at a different point in their journey and no two journeys are alike. People need to realize that sometimes.
—  Anonymous
If you know how to look, how to touch deeply, you will become birthless and deathless, because the nature of everything that is, is without birth and without death. You are in everything else, everything else is in you. Birth and death are just notions that scare us, and if you are able to remove the notions, you get the gift of non-fear, and only with non-fear can true happiness be possible.
—  Thich Nhat Hanh

The notion that peoples gender is assigned at birth is ludicrous. Gender roles have been chained to women since the inception of agriculture.

This notion that it’s “assigned” is total bull shit, assign implies that it’s arbitrary, that either option is equal. It’s not arbitrary. It is a conscious act of suppression of half the population.

Assigned also implies individualism. As if the individual was the unlucky one here. Which is not true. Half the population is fucked over with gender. “Born into” is at least slightly more honest.

And if Michael Brown was not angelic, I was practically demonic. I had my first drink when I was 11. I once brawled in the cafeteria after getting hit in the head with a steel trash can. In my junior year I failed five out of seven classes. By the time I graduated from high school, I had been arrested for assaulting a teacher and been kicked out of school (twice.) And yet no one who knew me thought I had the least bit of thug in me. That is because I also read a lot of books, loved my Commodore 64, and ghostwrote love notes for my friends. In other words, I was a human being. A large number of American teenagers live exactly like Michael Brown. Very few of them are shot in the head and left to bake on the pavement.

The “angelic” standard was not one created by the reporter. It was created by a society that cannot face itself, and thus must employ a dubious “morality” to hide its sins. It is reinforced by people who have embraced the notion of “twice as good” while avoiding the circumstances which gave that notion birth. Consider how easily living in a community “with rough patches” becomes part of a list of ostensible sins. Consider how easily “black-on-black crime” becomes not a marker of a shameful legacy of segregation but a moral failing.

—  Ta-Nehisi Coates, being amazing.
Watch on

they finally have it back on youtube.

I couldn’t be happier. 

Looney Tunes - Birth of a Notion (by aboharby1)