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Billy Joel - A Matter of Trust

Wrong

This may be kinda deep but.. Here’s a request, can you write a Spencer x Reader one-shot about the reader being in labor & during birth something goes wrong, and Spencer is really worried. After they don’t know if the reader will live or not, she wakes up to Spencer holding their child? Thank you so much, I LOVE your imagines!! Don’t want to seem creepy but I’ve literally been reading through your master list for a few hours now…

That is not creepy at all!  I am beyond honored that you are enjoying everything so much.  And I can most certainly do this!  Here is your one-shot, comin’ ‘atcha!


“Aaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhh!”

Bearing down with all of your might as you squeeze Spencer’s hand, his knees buckling as he grits his teeth, you sway your tired, sweaty gaze over to him as you growl.

“You don’t get to be hurt.”

“I know, sweetheart,” he breathes, panting as his hand begins to turn blue under your grasp.

Letting go of him as you grasp onto the hospital bed handle bars, Spencer breathes a sigh of relief as he flexes his fingers, grabbing a washcloth and dipping it into the cool water as you lob your head back onto the pillow.

“Oh, god,” you moan, your face grimacing as the doctor continues to encourage you.

“Come on, give me a good push!” he yells.

Catching your breath as you rear up, your face determined as you feel Spencer press a deep kiss into your ear, you bear down with all of your might just as you see the doctor’s facial expression change.

“Hold on…” he says, his arms flailing in between your legs as you begin to pant, your body overriding your ability to stop.

“Y/N…hold on.  Hold on, hold on…hold on!”

And before Spencer can ascertain what is happening, your world goes blank.

“Y/N!?” Spencer yells, watching your eyes flutter closed as your arms to limp, falling to the bed as he whips his head to the doctor.

“Doctor!  What’s happening!?”

But the nurses were already rushing him out of the room as his eyes dart around, settling on the steady trickle of red fluid in between your legs, pooling on the floor in front of the doctor.

“Y/N!!!!!!!!!!!!”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Watching in disbelief as Morgan and Rossi come careening through the double doors, they run over to a trembling Spencer, his ragged form pacing the hallway outside of your room.

“Reid!  Reid…what’s happened?” Morgan asks.

Bringing his teary-eyed gaze to meet his face, Rossi looks behind Spencer and smiles, pointing above his shoulder as the two younger men turn around.

“Dr. Reid?” the nurse asks, holding a small child in her arms, wrapped in a blue blanket.

Holding his arms out as she hands the small little creature to him, his arms cradling him close to his chest, a smile breaks out on his face as tears of worry continue to pour, his hands trembling as he bends down and kisses the sleeping boy.

“Ma’am,” Rossi interjects, “what’s happened to Y/N?”

As the three men look at the nurse, her face suddenly falls as she looks back over to Spencer.

“Your wife’s uterus ruptured during labor.  She began bleeding out in the room, so they gave her two units of blood.  She’s in surgery right now,” the nurse adds.

“T-to…to repair her uterus, right?” he asks, knowing the answer to the question before he finishes it.

“No,” the nurse shakes her head, “to remove it.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Coming to as your eyes flutter open, you feel the vomit rising in your throat as you tilt your head to the side.

“’Atta girl,” Rossi says, brushing your hair back as you puke into the peanut-shaped bowl, “let it out.”

“Da-…dav-…”

“Sssssshhhhh…” Morgan coos, rubbing your forehead down with a cool washcloth as you furrow your brow, feeling one more heave bring up the rest of your breakfast that morning as your body trembles.

Breathing hard as you settle back down, you watch as Morgan hands you a glass of water, Rossi placing a kiss to your temple as you choke it down, desperate to rid your mouth of the unpleasant taste.

“Wh-…what ha-appened?” you choke out, tears streaming down your cheeks, “where’s my baby boy?”

As the two men look at each other, you watch as Morgan steps out of the way, pointing over to the couch as your eyes settle onto the most beautiful sight you have ever taken in.

Spencer, your wonderful husband, holding your son close to his chest, the two of them sleeping soundly against one another as your son grips onto his pajama shirt.

Feeling your eyes water as a smile crosses your face, you turn your gaze back to Rossi as you take a deep breath.

“My uterus ruptured, didn’t it?” you ask.

As the two men looked at you, shock filling their eyes, you sigh as you lean into the hospital bed, your hand migrating under the blankets to finger the gauze around your midsection.

“Shit…” you whisper, your jaw beginning to tremble.

“How did you know?” Morgan asks, bringing his thumb to your cheek and wiping away your tear trails.

“The birth defect with my uterus,” you sigh, “I was born with a unicornuate uterus.”

“Translation for those of us that aren’t geniuses?” Rossi cocks an eyebrow in the air.

“It means that instead of having a full uterus for a child to grow,” Spencer groans as he sits himself up on the couch, “she only has half of one.  Half of a uterus, and only one ovary.”

Lobbing your head over to Spencer as tears stream down your face, a smile crests your cheeks as you take in a deep breath.

“Well…did,” you correct.

Watching as Spencer raises up from the couch, his form walking over towards you as he sits on the edge of the bed, he hands you the beautiful little bundle as you take your son in your arms, holding him close to your body as his eyes begin to peel open.

“Hello there, handsome,” you coo, your voice upticking as you smile at his big, blue eyes.

“We’ll leave you two alone,” Rossi says, putting his hand on Morgan’s back as he guides him out the door, shutting it behind him.

“How are you feeling?” Spencer asks, moving a strand of hair from your face as your eyes lay heavily on your son.

“Conflicted,” you admit.

As the two of you sit in silence, you staring at your son as Spencer stares at you, you watch as the little infant begins to nuzzle into your chest.

“I guess he’s hungry,” you muse, peeling back your hospital gown as your breast begins to swing.

“Lucky dog,” Spencer murmurs.

“Spencer!” you yelp, a chuckle emanating from your lips as a smile peels across his face.

And as silence falls upon the room yet again, you hear Spencer lightly sniffle.

“I thought I’d lost you,” he croaks, his forehead leaning against your temple as he nuzzles your cheek with his nose.

“Gonna take a lot more than child birth to get rid of me,” you muse.

“Not funny,” he says lowly, feeling a tear of his hit your cheek.

“I know…” you whisper, turning your head as you find your gaze met with him.

“I know.”

And as you feel Spencer’s lip lightly connect with yours, you feel his hand slowly trail down to your stomach, resting on top of your incision spot as he pulls back and searches your beautiful Y/C/E eyes.

“I love you, Y/N,” he muses lowly.

“And I love you,” you whisper back.

The Superiority of the Mother Over the Father 

Miraath Publications

Compiled and Translated by Abbas Abu Yahya (hafidhahullāh)

From Sa’eed bin Abu Burdah from his father who said: 

“Ibn ‘Umar (radhiAllāhu ‘anhu) said: he was making Tawāf and he saw a man making Tawāf while carrying his mother saying: ‘Indeed I am like her submissive camel. Even if her ride becomes startled I will not become startled and run away.

I carry her since she carried me more, do you think that I have paid her back O Ibn ‘Umar? He said No, not even one breath while giving birth.’”

PDF Available for Download Here.

(Source: Following the Sunnah)

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(via https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s6YlRC1vhjw)

Long and painful crowning, big bulge, lots of screaming and pleading with the attendant to pull it out to make the pain stop. 

Not that pretty as was in a bit of a rush but oh so tasty! Banana overnight oats, stewed Apple, pomegranate seeds, flax seeds and pumpkin seeds! #breakfast #sunday #porridge #seeds #colourfulfood #nutsandseeds #weekendtime #fitfam #foodie #livewell #nunum #goodness #gettheglow #student #exeter #eating #yummy #blogger #blog #veggiebuzzing #nutrition #nourish #healthychoice #healthyfoodshare #veggies #detox #healthyyetyummy #pecansandpomegranates by pecansandpomegranates https://www.instagram.com/p/BBen_ngjQ8m/

Of Babies and Big Brothers (A Joshifer Drabble)

Good morning everybody! Some Joshifer trash for your literary pleasure this morning…Joshifer babies are my weakness, okay? Hope you like it!

It had been a long night. My body ached, sweat covered my every surface, and I felt as though I could barely keep my eyes open, let alone give another life-breathing push. Josh was at my side, breathing words that would never reach my ears because I was grunting and moaning. The only thing I found he was good for was allowing his hand to be squeezed to bits as I let that ground me.

“Okay, Jennifer, great job, just a few more pushes and she’ll be here,” the doctor instructed from her position below me. I flopped back on the pillow. I could feel the tears welling up in my eyes even though I tried to stop them. My head shook seemingly of its own accord.

“What is it, baby?” Josh’s voice finally reached me. I brought my hands up to my face, covering it.

“I don’t wanna do it anymore,” I whimpered. I could hear Josh chuckle slightly before shaking his head and bringing my hand up to his lips.

“I know, Jen, I know. But we wanna meet our baby girl, right?” I nodded. “So you’ve got to stay tough, babe. You can do it, I’m right here, okay?” he encouraged.

“Okay,” I grunted, squeezing his hand and bracing myself as another contraction hit. The doctor’s voice sounded out from below again, and Josh’s was in my ear, and the pain throbbed all the way to my core, but I kept going. I kept going until everything surrounding me was blurred into nothingness, until it was just me and my body and my baby. Until out from the blur sounded a shrill cry, and I felt the weight slip out of my body and onto my chest. Until our daughter was finally here.

The knot in my throat was so big I could hardly breathe, kept choking on it as I shakily put my arms around the squealing infant on my chest. She was the most beautiful thing I had ever seen; angry red, wrinkly, all of it. She was mine and she was Josh’s and she was perfect. They whisked her away to be cleaned, and Josh’s eyes followed her as far as they could before giving up and resting back on mine. I don’t think I had ever been looked at with more love. He leaned down, pressed his lips to mine hard, and rested his forehead on mine.

“Good job, baby,” he breathed. I leaned in for one more kiss before we were interrupted, probably not for the last time, by our new baby, clean and ready to be comforted. I sat up gingerly.

“C’mere, baby girl,” I cooed. “Someone needs some lovin’ from her momma, doesn’t she?” The nurse passed her to me, and her whimpers finally calmed down as she sunk into my arms. There might have been more people in the room besides Josh and me and her, but I would’ve never known. I couldn’t stop staring at her, this beautiful little bundle. She already had a thick sprout of dark hair, obviously Josh’s, and she was opening her little eyes to reveal their blue. I pressed an index finger to her little lips, swiping it gently over her tear-stained cheek, letting it rest near her hand before she grabbed onto it with such force I knew she was my kid.

“Lookie, Joshy,” I whispered, as if speaking louder would break the beauty of the moment. “Look at what we made together.”

“Mmhmm,” he responded, neither of us taking our eyes off her for a second. We stayed like that for a very long time, Josh peeking over the top of my head as I held her. Until I remembered a few people remained anxiously in the waiting room, one of whom had been dragged out of bed just to meet his new little sister.

“Hun?” I said. Josh craned his neck to make eye contact.

“You ready?” he asked, and I nodded.

“Go bring ‘em in.” At this he eased himself off the bed, leaving me for a moment with the baby to go corral the troops. It was only a moment of peace before they started trampling, as quietly as the Lawrence clan could, into our private hospital room. Josh led the way, behind him my mom and dad, who held Noah, and my brothers and their wives with strollers of sleeping children. I was pretty sure there was a visitor limit, but I wasn’t going to be the one to bring it up.

“Hi, honey,” my mom whisper-spoke, easily approaching me with wide, tear-filled eyes. “Look at this little angel,” she gasped, leaning over me to look into the depths of the blanket. She rested her arm on mine and squeezed a little. “Oh, Jenny Lou, she is beautiful,” she said with all the pride of a brand-new grandma. Noah had since been passed to Josh, who came up on the other side, my dad now free to give me a quick squeeze and a kiss on the head. Everyone talked quietly amongst themselves, venturing looks at the new baby, but nobody approached quite yet. They knew it was Noah’s turn.

I looked over to my son, who was at eye-level with me in his father’s arms. He looked curious, but shyly so. He leaned carefully toward the bundle, a furrowed look on his face, but kept his distance.

“Hi, Noah, baby,” I spoke. He looked at me as if he was deciding if I was still the same Mommy that gave him his afternoon snack every day.

“Hi, Mommy,” he said, apparently having made up his mind, and pointed. “Is that my new sister?”

“Uh-huh, baby, it is,” I said, positioning her to face him. I tugged on the blanket to reveal her little wrinkled face. “She was in Mommy’s tummy, remember? But she’s all ready to meet you now.” He still looked at her with an air of reservation. I motioned to Josh to set him down on the bed next to me. He immediately leaned into my chest, both seeking comfort and getting a closer look at this “new sister” deal.

“Noah, you know what?”

“What Mommy?”

“Your sister knows what you sound like.”

“She does?”

“Mmhmm. She could hear you when she was in Mommy’s tummy. And I bet if you talk to her now, she’d listen.” At this, he leaned in closer, as if he was going for a kiss. Instead, he whispered in her ear, “Hi sissy, I’m Noah. I love you,” after which, he really did give her a kiss on the cheek. A chorus of “awww”s sounded from the crowd around my bed, and I kissed my son on the top of his blonde, curly-haired head, leaving him beside me but opening up the conversation with everyone else. They all came closer, and she was passed around until everyone had gotten to hold her, my mom staking claim not once, but twice. My sisters-in-law and my mother asked me how I was, how everything went, while Blaine earned a well-deserved smack on the arm from my mother after teasing, “Gee, Jen, how’d something so cute come from the ugly one of the family?”

Eventually my baby girl made it back into Josh’s arms, and I pulled Noah as close as I could without actually putting him on my lap, just content to cuddle with my oldest baby. No one seemed to want to leave anytime soon, and I wasn’t complaining. I mean, I was exhausted, but the gentle chatter that surrounded us was soothing, and I knew I wouldn’t hesitate to kick them to the curb when the time came for me to sleep. My brothers crashed on the sofas in our room, their wives guarding the soft sleepers in their strollers. My mom and dad were positioned up by our bed still, just content to watch, probably because they were the two that started this whole little family that now currently existed in one hospital room. At this thought I became emotional again, but I wrote it off as hormones and attempted to quell them before anyone took notice. Unfortunately, Ben eyed me curiously and asked me what was wrong, drawing everyone’s attention back to me.

“I just – ” I started, choking on words. I let my empty fist drop to my thigh in quiet exasperation. “I just really love everyone in here, that’s all,” I managed. I expected some sort of playful retaliation from my brothers or my dad, but nobody said anything. My mom just gave me another gentle squeeze and a kiss to the temple, and everyone stayed quiet for a while. Until –

“So, you guys, are you ever gonna introduce us to our new niece?” Carson asked. It really did feel odd for her to not have her name yet, and we had been deciding between two. I made eye contact with Josh.

“Honey?”

“Yeah, I know. So what’ll it be, babe? Is she a Grace or an Isabella?” He passed her back to me, and we took a moment just to look at her, as if no one else was even there. I took in her little nose which would one day grow to look like mine, surely, and those eyes which had since shut but which I knew to be my exact shade of blue. Her little dark hair, her sweet little lips and soon-to-be chubby cheeks. I felt her weight in my arms and I just knew.

“She feels pretty damn like a Grace, I think, Josh,” I said. “What d’you think?”

At this he playfully rubbed the scruff on his chin and looked at her with a furrowed brow. He squinted. He leaned closer to her face, as if trying to get a really good look. And, crossing his arms, he began to nod decisively.

“Yeah, I think I’m getting a pretty strong Grace vibe.”

We turned to our little crowd of Lawrences.

“Okay, everybody, this is Grace Karen Hutcherson,” I announced, looking up at her namesake, who, unsurprisingly and unashamedly, had fresh tears sprouting from her eyes. She tried to get something out before giving up and simply hugging me as fiercely as she could while I was still sitting. Once she regained her composure, she once again cried, “Grandma’s turn!” and pried the sleeping infant from my arms. The ease of weight on my arms felt all at once wonderful to my exhausted body and uncomfortable because I was so used to her warmth. I looked back to my side to discover the reason Noah had been quiet for so long; his thumb resting in his mouth, he had easily fallen asleep against me. I wrenched my arm free from his little body and wrapped him in an embrace. Okay, now I was tired. I cleared my throat in Josh’s direction and he nodded slightly.

“Okay, everyone, love you all a bunch, but do you wanna come back tomorrow?” he said, adding with a wink in my direction, “I’m just so exhausted with all the work I’ve been doing today.” This got a laugh from pretty much everybody, and I received a long line of kisses on cheeks, congratulations and promises of returning in the morning. My mom handed Grace back to me with a kiss to my forehead and another, “I’m so proud of you, sweetheart,” before Josh handed Noah back to my dad and they parted. Once again, it was just Josh, Grace, and I. I shifted her little weight so she rested on her tummy atop my chest and closed my eyes. Josh closed the door and dimmed the lights before prying our daughter from my quickly fading grasp and kissing me one last time for good measure.

“I love you so much, Jennifer,” he whispered.

“Mmmm,” I sighed against his lips. “Love you too.” My eyes stayed shut and I could feel myself falling quickly into oblivion. The last thing I remembered before I fell asleep was thinking how full my heart was with love, and how full our house was with little people that were half me and half Josh, and how, when I thought about it, that was all I had ever wanted since the day I met him. So I fell asleep in disbelief that my life could turn out the way that it had; not the fame or the fortune or even the acting career that I loved, but the children and the family and the life that we had built together. What a crazy, beautiful life it had turned out to be.

Pregnancy Phobia &/or Fantasy?????

I’m absolutely terrified of the idea of a baby developing inside me and I’m terrified of giving birth.


even if I decide I want kids, I want to adopt bc pregnancy sounds like the worst thing ever (I’m thorough with my BC, I always use condoms and the Pill with sex)
especially for someone like me who not only has normally painful joints and low energy, but also a pretty sensitive vagina. SO PREGNANCY/ BIRTH IS A NIGHTMARE TO ME! !!!!!

YET, sometimes I keep getting this “fantasy” I guess you could say, of myself being pregnant. like I imagine being pregnant and being really cherished and taken care of by a really sweet man, and I think about us having a cute little kid that looks like us and that we can love together. and the fantasy makes me feel really loved by whoever this guy is. (sometimes the guy is my boyfriend, sometimes it’s another specific guy I know at college, sometimes it’s a hot stranger I saw, sometimes it’s just a male silhouette)

maybe I’m just really craving a mature and loving relationship?
maybe my birth control that I started taking for the first time in August 2015 is making me feel this way bc of the Hormone change??? maybe extra Estrogen
plays a part?

Like I don’t choose to think about this stuff. it just pops up in my mind and I daydream about it.

Its weird, i’ve never been one to idolize traditional values like marriage nor care about having a husband, and I still don’t care. I hate babies and think they’re gross. Just the thought of giving birth makes me feel so sick I wanna vomit

But, why am I having these pregnancy fantasies then???????!!!!!!!

Feel free to message me or Instant message me, I’d be really interested to hear what anyone has to say! C;

Why Female Newborns Are Better Protected From Brain Injury

Each year, thousands of newborn babies suffer complications during pregnancy or birth that deprive their brains of oxygen and nutrient-rich blood and result in brain injury. This deprivation results in hypoxic ischemic encephalopathy (HIE), which can lead to long-term neurological issues such as learning disabilities, cerebral palsy or even death.

The research is in eNeuro. (full open access)