Hooray, I finally finished! This is based on @russianfeya‘s Neon Pink Motorcycle fic. It’s a soulmate AU where people have a mark that changes color depending on the soulmate’s mood. Yuri no longer has a mark (due to Reasons) and it just hit me in the most recent chapter that when Otabek asks “How are you feeling?” he’s actually…you know, comparing notes. :D Anyway, if that sounds like something you’d like to read, I highly recommend it!
The infamous clothes swap is finally here! When you start off with dressing up D.va all cute and things escalate and you get a Junkrat in a thight suit and a Lucio that, just like in comp, just fills whatever role is left.
It’s been a week so it’s pretty clear I’m never getting my scissors back. I’m about to order some new ones, but I can’t decide between getting the same 4.5 inch ones I had or the 6.5 inch ones that actually look more like the ones in the show.
The bigger ones are 8 dollars more but I kind of want them more. What do you think, should I go for it? I’ve been spending a lot of money lately but I know I’d get a lot of use out of these and they’d make me happy. Hmmm.
Penis size isn't dictated by height but rather a hidden variable in the human genome with direct correlation to how sick of a kick flip you can do. Though recent studies have shown you don't actually need the penis physically, because its more a determination of your ability to wield one should you come in possession of one at some point. My biology professor taught us a simple rhyme to remember: "The sicker the flip, the bigger the dick"
oooo… when you explain it like that it makes sense
Now, in 2017, it might be hard to see why this was such an influential video part. Barely an Insta-worth of actual skating, falls that take too long, funny clothes and hair, awkward 411vm-style interview, TWO lipslides…but in 1995, all the pieces came together–Bigger flips, bigger rails, taller bars, cleaner landings, fatter wheels and boards, that opening line…THAT OPENING LINE. Way before Olson apparently went on a permanent, monochromatic acid trip in the latter Shorty’s days, he (along with Kirchart, in this same video, and a handful of others) was at the forefront of what skateboarding would be in the coming years–juggernaut culture more content with risking life and limb (and looking good while doing it) than kicking and flopping around a parking lot for hours at a time, only to go home angry and unfulfilled.
-What a show off. I cannot even begin to describe how much a show off he is.
-Both on and off the team.
-On the team, he’ll pull off those bigger moves with more flips than necessary.
-Off the team he’ll try to best people at competitions
-He is so competitive (in a playful way)
-If he ever tells you he’ll take it easy on you, don’t believe him.
-That butt will show off how great he is while simultaneously making it look easy.
-The only thing that you might be better at against him are racing games.
-I’m serious, take this opportunity to put him in his place. XD
-He flirts more than Wally does, and that’s saying something.
-I think Dick is better at flirting than Wally because he knows just what to say to make you swoon. Wally goes for the funny side of it to make you laugh.
-He’ll invite you over to watch movies, play video games, and just hang out.
-Be prepared for a truck load of random questions.
-Don’t be weirded out of he already knows some of the answers. He was raised by the worlds best detective after all.
-Whenever your hair falls in you face or is getting too long he’ll gently sweep it out of your face.
-His hand will linger longer than necessary, but you don’t question it.
-If you fall asleep in a weird place/position he’ll pick you up and bring you somewhere more comfortable.
-Gentle kisses to the forehead while you sleep/nap.
-Whenever you do something he considers cute, he will stop what he’s doing and just stare at you while his face turns red.
-After a while of dancing around his feelings for you, (and him talking to batman about it for him in season 1) he’ll get you guys to go on a date by setting up a “group hangout” with people you both know.
-These people will include Barbara, Wally and maybe a few of your friends.
-When you get there it’s just him there and wow the others are late huh? Guess we should enjoy the carnival/café/movies by ourselves since you know, we’re already here.
-You two end up having a blast where you are. Both of you just enjoying each other’s company.
-By the end of the day he’ll confess to you that he likes you by giving you a sweet kiss.
Warning: phone sex Eunhyuk’s phone rings in his pocket. He quickly fishes it out and accepts the call. “Hey, baby, what’s up?” “Hey. What are you up to?” You say at the other end of the line. “I’m at Tous Les Jours at the moment.” “When can you come home?” “I’ll be home soon, I promise.” “But I want you here now.” Eunhyuk smiles - he can practically hear your pout in your voice. “Why?” “Because I miss you. I really miss you.” Eunhyuk catches on to the meaning behind your words. He can’t fight the smirk pulling at his lips as he moves away from the crowd of fans who have invaded the place to see him. “Oh really? How much do you miss me?” “So, so much. All I can think of is you being here with me; your hands on me, your lips on my neck, my fingers in your hair.” Eunhyuk closes his eyes and swallows. He pictures what you just described in his head - your bodies intertwined on the bed, his mouth lavishing your neck as you writhe in his arms, grinding against him as you tangle your fingers in his hair, letting them run down his back before gripping onto his shirt and pulling him even closer to your trembling body. “I need you, Hyukkie.” “God, baby,” Eunhyuk groans quietly at the desperation in your voice before letting out a shaky breath as he feels his cock twitch in the confines of his jeans. “I want you so badly. I want you to pin me against the bed and rip my clothes off and cover me in hickeys as your fingers tease my nipples, making me moan and beg for more.” Eunhyuk swallows again to moisten his mouth as your words made it go dry. “What else do you want me to do to you, babe?” He asks in a hushed voice, so low you barely hear him at the other end of the line. “I want to you to go down on me. God, I love your tongue on me - it feels so amazing and you know exactly what to do with it to make me scream.” Back at home, you picture Eunhyuk’s head in between your legs; his dark hair tickling your inner thighs, his eyes meeting yours, shining with mischief and lust, as his mouth works flawlessly on you. The mental image makes your skin prickle with desire. “What about when I use my fingers?” Eunhyuk asks, now making his way out back and heading for an empty stockroom. He locks himself in it and leans against the shelves and palms his hardening cock through his jeans. “Oh God, yes, your fingers. I love it when you fuck me with three of your fingers, curling them and twisting them inside me.” Eunhyuk sinks his teeth into his bottom lip and unfastens his jeans to relieve some of the pressure. He can’t help but notice a hint of breathlessness in your voice that’s all too familiar. “How many fingers do you have inside you right now, babe?” “Two. They feel so good and they’re making me so wet.” Eunhyuk moans at the mental image of you lying back, your hand in your underwear, your body jerking to your ministrations. He can’t hold back any longer - he delves into his boxers and wraps his hand around his cock. The sudden encasement of warmth from his palm makes him groan, and even one slow pump has his breath hitching in his throat. “I’m so hard for you right now.” “Good. I want you hard. I want you to slam that hard cock into me all the way, filling me up completely. I want you to start fucking me hard and fast because you’re too horny to start off slow. I want you to fuck me into the mattress, making those hickeys on my neck bigger, then flip me over and pull me onto my hands and knees and fuck me from behind, your hands holding my hips tightly.” Back at home, your fingers speed up and you rub your clit with your thumb, your hips bucking into your hand as you moan erotically down the phone to your boyfriend. Eunhyuk pumps his cock faster at the sound as his skin prickles and heats up under his shirt. “Do you want me to spank you?” “Yes, oh God, yes,” you practically beg. “I want you to spank my ass hard, leaving me with red hand prints, then reach around and rub my clit as you fuck me so hard I can’t say any other words apart from your name.” “Fuck, babe,” Eunhyuk growls, moaning and bucking into his hand as he jerks off even faster. At the other end, you add another finger inside you and curl them slightly, making you cry out in ecstasy, your back arching and your eyes fluttering shut. “Hyukkie, I’m so close.” “Cum for me, baby. I want to hear you scream.” You don’t disappoint. It doesn’t take long for your hand to help you reach that apex of euphoria; with a cry and curse, you tumble head-first into the throes of your orgasm, clenching around your fingers as your hips buck without abandon into your hand, your whole body writhing and trembling, Eunhyuk’s name rolling out of your mouth in erotic exclamations. This is more than enough to tip Eunhyuk’s over the edge too and with a moan of your name and full-body spasm, he releases into his hand, trying to remember through the glorious haze of his orgasm to not get any on the floor. The two of you breathe heavily down the phone to each other as you both try to catch your breath. “That was…oh my God, that was amazing,” Eunhyuk says. “It really was. It would have been even better if it was your hand doing the work instead of mine, though. Seriously, when are you coming home?” “Soon, baby. And you’re going to be in so much trouble when I do.” You giggle. “I like the sound of that.” Eunhyuk chuckles and after an exchange of goodbyes and ‘I love you’s, he hangs up. He leaves the stockroom and heads in the direction of the bathroom - he definitely should wash his hands before meeting fans.
title: 104th Street pairing: Levi/Eren & Erwin/Eren note(s): levi and erwin reverting into teenage boys bc of eren jaeger. probably ooc. i can’t even be sorry. summary: In which Levi has a potty mouth, Erwin’s the disappointed mother, and they both fall for Eren Jaeger at first sight.