anonymous asked:

Oh, so, are all ES heroes mentally challenged in some way?

Nah, not mentally challenged, just… off. Anyone drawn to that profession is never going to be your typical Tamriel citizen (IE the kind of person who does the same thing every day, like meeting their friend to talk about mudcrabs or wandering a single spot for several hours)

Let’s face it, the legends might speak of the Dragonborn killing Alduin, or the Champion of Cyrodiil fighting off daedric armies, but that’s the stuff the bards tell.

The REAL stories, in the history books, the local rumors, and similar, will all talk about stuff like 

“And then the Nerevarine gulped down fifteen pounds of ebony in one bite, jumped to the moon, and talked five guys into killing themselves just so he could steal their pants.”

“The Champion was known for standing in places, hours on end, casting the same spell over and over again with a blank expression.”

“Unfortunately, much of the dragonborn’s personal life remains unknown, due to their house being stuffed so full of artifacts that nobody can open the fucking door.”

You know why we never really hear about the other characters? Because TES historians are so embarrassed by all this shit they just never write down anything but the basics.

anonymous asked:

if hisoillu had a pet ... what animal would it be and what characteristics would it have ?

One of the many halfway-written ficlets I have is about this precisely. Illumi loves children, that’s just facts

Hisoka does too but has exactly no desire to parent one? It becomes a point of contention in their relationship down the line

So he gets Illu a kitten.