big adobo spice

March 16th at height of my Personal fame I wrote my home town on my hand to humble myself. Its not every night you get almost shit faced w/ a baseball millionaire. I was happy that he saved the brown hairband because I appreciated that… Only people w/ long hair can understand what its like not having anything to put your hair up. Long story short I got drunk with No Jose & watched him sing songs I never heard of… Good times Nothing I wouldn’t do with my mom around. Tho it was kind of loud.


The first step is to acknowledge you have a problem… My problem is my heart writes what my dick is thinking & my brain cleans up the wording. It was all about Puerto Rican women & celebrities, Cultivating beautiful minds & funny lines. Interjecting my insightful snarky comments at the right point. Go on Twitter, Search the word Puerto Rican watch what pops up. Find a face to follow & another one & another one, like a harvest of women from the mother land. Deep down there can only be one is my thinking. My parents been married for 43 years & they still can’t get each other right.. So I made my courting process simple.  Since guys only think of one thing, I made a list of other things I find important in a suiter. 

  1. Must be Puerto Rican - I want my kids to have a chance defend their Mother land in sports (really the World baseball classic)
  2. Willing & able to Cook alcapurrias 4 times a year for me - If the alcapurrias are on point this will cancel any fear of me cheating on you. (forever the truth)
  3. Big Crazy Family - There is nothing wrong with me  trying to find the same type of environment I grew up in. (like 2 corporations  merging)
  4. Good hair - My hair is an advanced form of Nappy, fluffy, chunky, clumpy & curly. (I just wonder how I’m going to share this DNA) 
  5. Mets babies - Tho it doesn’t show up on the field. Mets fans are smarter than Jankees Fans. So to the one whom ejects my Little Sofrito Spice out her Vaginal crevice. If he/she isn’t a Mets baby.. I just pay the child support. (the last thing I need is a lil arrogant & cocky version of me)

I haven’t found my 5 for 5 woman but Now I don’t really care… Just give me a down ass chick with 4 out of 5 I’ll be good. (or not)

I’m in Rehab 


It doesn’t matter who I drink with, I wake up the next day God willing… I think we went to find some baseballs so No Jose can sign.. This was a one take shot  ( no bullshit ) He’s a talent PGA watch out! you’re looking at the first Dominican to win a major 


Hats 2 for 30 fitted where can you find that?? in the Port of St. Lucie. The New owner don’t do much talking. He’s a man of few words… Mostly telling me things I can’t do.. (you can’t tell me what I can’t do) Its a no fun police zone with me…