biblical heroes

You woke up everyday, and you could never decide the name you’d like to use. You changed them as I changed my hair,and my shoes. Your names seemed to always be biblical; heroes, of sorts. Sometimes your name was that of a god, or that of destruction. Ezra was one of your favorites; second to Gabriel and Deicide. You’ve always been odd; lord am I glad I fell in love with your fighters hands, Cracked, scabbed and calloused. They always seemed to be bruised, or bloodied. They where crisis crossed with scars; constellations, you’d whisper, as I lay there counting them. Today your name is Gabriel. I don’t care much; I love you no matter how you see yourself.
—  Lonliness

spark-of-jenius  asked:

While I'm coming up with a wish list of "stuff I need to see on SH": the next time Katrina goes on about Abraham needing a second chance or being secretly good, I really, really need SOMEBODY to point out that HE EFFING. MURDERED. ICHABOD. WITH AN AXE TO THE CHEST. (And then I want to see Katrina try to gloss over it again, and Abbie punch her in the face.)

Welp, the new clip where Abbie says “Katrina was right” has me GOOD AND ANGRY so let’s talk about all the reasons Abraham is an awful, awful person who should never be redeemed and the show is messed in the head for even suggesting we should root for him to get a second chance. 


  • Killed Crane, as you said, WITH AN AXE TO THE CHEST.
  • Murdered August Corbin in cold blood.
  • Murdered Reverend Knapp.
  • Murdered multiple Masons and made festive arts and crafts with their craniums.
  • Attempted to kill Crane and Abbie every day for several months.
  • Directly or indirectly murdered so many people I can’t count them all.
  • Worked in concert with Henry to slowly suffocate Crane to death in a pine box and leave Abbie Mills trapped in Purgatory as a demon’s plaything.
  • Very nearly murdered Jenny. 
  • Accepted Katrina as his rapey reward for working with Henry.
  • Kept Katrina as a captive and tried to Stockholm her into loving him.
  • Wanted to involve Katrina in a weird ass murder ritual to make sure she loved him.
  • Tried to murder Ichabod AGAIN. SOME MORE.
  • When given a chance at redemption because ALL THESE REASONS AREN’T ENOUGH TO DAMN HIM, his first action after promising not to kill anyone was to reforge his death axe of death. AND IMMEDIATELY TRY TO KILL ICHABOD.

You’ll notice I used the word murder above. I don’t think we use this enough in fandom. “Kill” sounds nicer. There can be legitimate reasons to kill, after all. But this is homicide. This is literally the death of a person. And time and again, Abraham has chosen to be a murderer. 

There are some shows where you still root for people who have done horrible things. The Vampire Diaries was one; I understand Once Upon a Time is another. But in those shows, usually everyone is involved in more moral ambiguity. Everyone has blood on their hands. But this character spent the first season characterized as a remorseless killing machine, set in direct Biblical opposition to our heroes, who have not killed many human people.

Every show has its own internal morality. Some shows leave piles of bodies behind with a shrug. Others act like someone getting a paper cut is the end of the world. Sleepy Hollow has chosen, for all its insanity, to be a show grounded in a fairly familiar, modern-day morality system. Time and again, we have seen our characters mourning the innocent people who died — Caroline, the lady at the bank, the victims of the Pied Piper. They have chosen to make those deaths meaningful. Our heroes do not kill humans. That is something they simply do not do. Therefore, people who do kill humans are bad. This is the morality system the show has chosen.

You can’t just backtrack that with a handsome guy in a wig and some sad sack jealousy backstory. It does not work within the morality system the show has built. Why did the Pied Piper deserve to die but not Abraham? Why did the painting murderer deserve to die but not Abraham? Why do Abbie and Crane kill any monsters? Why don’t they deserve the same grace?

You know what you call a guy who kills a bunch of people because he was rejected by a woman? Elliot Rodger. And I refuse to root for that person’s redemption. I. Refuse. 


Christian Bale, badass Moses

It’s been almost fifty years since a live-action retelling of Moses and the Israelites’ epic exodus from Egypt has hit the big screen. Thankfully, a new man has stepped forward to don the mantle of the Biblical hero: Batman himself, Christian Bale.

Bale’s Moses, soon to appear in the upcoming Ridley Scott film Exodus: Gods and Kings, is not your grandparents’ Moses. In the vein of Noah, which came out this spring, the movie will include action-packed sequences that you might not hear about in Sunday school.

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