beyond--redemption

hey kids

you know why I like redemption narratives? because a redemption narrative says: no matter how broken or wrong or bad or stupid or ridiculous or harmful or sad or terrible, you can atone.

there is still a road back. it might be rocky and steep, complicated and messy. walking it may take all your life. you may lose your foothold, slip and fall back into the abyss, but the wall is still there. the ascent is still there. hard is not the same as impossible.

you are never too far gone. you are never beyond saving. 

We’re often viewed as second-class American citizens. This is nothing new, sadly. A while ago, we were called parasites for wanting statehood because it gives us equal rights as such citizens without the need to leave our home island.


But anyway, two lives have been lost today. And the hurricane hasn’t fully arrived yet. This monster is going to tear us apart. We are expecting to stay without electricity and water for months. The pessimists are claiming that it could actually be more than a year without fulfilling our basic needs in a safe environment. Our infrastructure is shit. Our government is beyond redemption. The current state of our economy may worsen by the aftermath of this hurricane.


This may become the most catastrophic storm to hit Puerto Rico in its history.


And some of my people are still unwilling to believe it’s coming.


This is going to be one hell of a ride.

I still don’t know what all Noora knows, I still don’t know what the fight was about, and as much as I’m pissed, I still don’t know why Yousef “Anything for you, girl” Acar was seen hooking up with Noora. 

But what I do know? 

Fuck Vilde for going behind Sana’s back, spreading Islamophobic, vindictive misinformation about someone who has stood up for her time and time again.

You all want cancel someone? There she is. 

She’s hit my last straw.

I don’t care if a bus hits her, she’s beyond the point of redemption. 

For all who excused Mr. Trump’s rhetoric in the campaign as just talk, the reckoning has come. I hope it isn’t true, but I fear Mr. Trump is nearing or perhaps already beyond any hope of redemption. And now the question is will enough pressure be turned to all those who enable his antics with their tacit encouragement. There has been a wall of unbending support from virtually every Republican in Congress, and even some Democrats. Among many people, this will be seen as anything approaching acceptable. And mind you, talk is cheap. No one needs to hear how you don’t agree with the President. What are you going to do about it? Do you maintain that an Administration that seeks to subvert the protections of our Constitution is fit to rule unchecked? Or fit to rule at all?
—  Dan Rather

Okay, so like next time someone wants to point out a-fucking-gain how horribly Kylo Ren treated other characters in The Force Awakens and how it puts him beyond the chance of redemption, I want them to remember this scene.  This is the state that Darth Vader put Luke in even though he knew he is his son.  Luke barely escapes Cloud City severely physically and mentally battered, his hand cut off and everything he thought he knew violently ripped out from under him.  But that’s not the only thing that kills me about this scene; look how haunted he looks.  Look how scared he appears when he knows he’s looking out onto Vader, who put him into this state, and knowing Vader is probably staring right back.  Not only that, but he’s going to have to inevitably face him again.

And yet he still finds in his heart to forgive Vader and sets him on the path back to the light.

If you can accept this but are still convinced that Kylo Ren is not wroth having his own redemption arc, you’re not watching the series correctly.

overwatch starters

 i play to win.  
❝  this is my curse. ❞ 
❝  wait for me! ❞ 
❝  your mother would’ve been proud of you. ❞
❝  let us hope for a different outcome. ❞ 
❝  sorry it’s such a mess in here. i-i wasn’t expecting company. ❞
❝  this is going to make you feel better. ❞
❝  the true enemy of humanity is disorder. ❞ 
❝  a steady blade balances the soul. ❞ 
❝  this is just like old times. ❞ 
❝  even here i feel an outcast. ❞ 
❝  think you can do my job, do you… ❞
❝  all eyes on me! ❞ 
❝  ooh, this is my jam. ❞
❝  got your aim from your mom, i see. ❞
❝  i’ll feast on your soul. ❞ 
❝  cheers, love! the cavalry’s here! ❞ 
❝   our paths cross for now. as to the future, we shall see. ❞ 
❝   we could’ve built an empire together. ❞ 
❝   ah. just setting foot here sets my soul at ease. ❞ 
❝  this time, stay down. ❞ 
❝  can i get your autograph? ❞
❝  why are you so angry? ❞
❝  ever get that feeling of déjà vu? ❞ 
❝  i am a different man now. i am whole. ❞ 
❝  over my dead body. ❞ 
❝   i’m on top of the world! ❞
❝  i’m patched up. ❞ 
❝  kids today with techno music. you should enjoy the classics, like hasselhoff. ❞
❝   what’s wrong? don’t you recognize me? ❞ 
❝   aren’t you warm wearing all that? ❞ 
❝  can’t stop, won’t stop. ❞
❝  i’ll race ya! ❞
❝   mock death at your own peril. ❞ 
❝  this time, i will finish the job. ❞ 
❝  death is an illusion. ❞
❝  look at this team! we’re gonna do great. ❞
❝  i am beyond redemption. ❞
❝   it looks like we will be working together. ❞ 
❝   you’ve rescued me again. ❞ 
❝  i will not be defeated so easily. ❞
❝  treasure? s-sure, i don’t know anything you’re talking about. ❞ 
❝  so this is what has become of you? a pity.❞
❝  you’re so amazing! you inspire me. ❞ 
❝  i miss him greatly. ❞ 
❝  there is nowhere to hide. ❞ 
❝  whatcha’ lookin’ at? ❞ 
❝  woo, nothing’s gonna stop me. ❞
❝  that was your dream, not mine. ❞ 
❝  what you call freedom is an illusion that causes more harm than good. ❞ 
❝  hehe, there’s something on your dress.. ❞ 
❝  you have been judged! ❞
❝   i have the upper hand this time. ❞ 
❝  traitor! ❞
❝  you will never amount to anything! ❞
❝  i’ve got my eye on you. ❞
❝  lot of memories of this place. they weren’t all bad. ❞
❝  the heart of a man still beats inside of me. ❞ 
❝  stay out of trouble. ❞
❝  step into my parlor said the spider to the fly. ❞
❝  one shot, one kill. ❞
❝  don’t think i’m happy about that. ❞ 
❝  now this place? makes me wanna be an atheist. ❞
❝  our world is worth fighting for. ❞
❝  you haven’t aged a day. what’s your secret? ❞
❝  ooooh, shiny! ❞
❝  oh, did that sting? ❞
❝  heroes never die. ❞
❝  where does it hurt? ❞
❝  you’re just a no-good bully. ❞
❝  i’m a one-man apocalypse. ❞
❝  you should look somewhere else. ❞
❝  you said you would arm wrestle me. nervous? ❞
❝  i learned that from my brother. ❞ 
❝  i hope nobody saw that. ❞
❝  on a scale of one to ten, how is your pain? ❞
❝  i’m not a miracle worker. well… not always. ❞
❝  this was once my home. no longer. ❞
❝  sorry! sorry, i’m sorry. sorry. ❞
❝  i remember being here. it was good for my tan. ❞
❝  wish i’d practice my japanese more, konichiwa! ❞
❝  you need a time out. ❞ 
❝  you might not want to tell your friends about that. ❞
❝  guess we know who’s really on top, don’t we? ❞
❝  with every death, comes honor. with honor, redemption. ❞
❝  a punishment for your crimes. ❞ 
❝  i will be on my best behaviour. ❞
❝  you think there’s something worth stealing in that temple? ❞
❝  people should be free. ❞ 
❝  you were never my equal. ❞
❝  death walks among you. ❞ 
❝   last i checked, i didn’t ask for your opinion. ❞ 
❝   you can’t be serious. ❞ 
❝   they’re back. ❞ 
❝   armor? how positively primitive. ❞
❝   now this is my kinda city, everyone’s free to live as they choose. ❞
❝   you need a time out. ❞ 
❝   die! die! die! ❞ 
❝   to think i would have to work with a street ruffian. ❞ 
❝   death comes. ❞ 
❝   one of these days someone is gonna to put an end to you. ❞ 
❝   that which doesn’t kill you…makes you stronger.. ❞
❝   well. you sure take to this bad guy thing easily, don’t ya? ❞
❝   aren’t you supposed to be dead? ❞
❝  i’ll tell you my secret if you give me your coat. ❞
❝   sleep. ❞
❝  never liked you much. ❞
❝  never leave a teammate behind. ❞
❝  together we are strong. ❞
❝  you won’t get rid of me that easily. ❞
❝  i don’t even think children are afraid of you. ❞
❝  i taught you everything you know. ❞
❝  it’s hard to just sit around knowing there’s someone out there that needs to be blown up. ❞
❝  i’ll put an end to your sad story. ❞
❝  you havin’ trouble keeping up? ❞
❝  i have destroyed more of your kind than i can count. ❞
❝ it’s a perfect day for some mayhem. ❞
❝  we’re all soldiers now. ❞
❝  give me your best shot. ❞
❝   you knew exactly what were you doing. ❞
❝   knock me down, and i’ll keep getting back up. ❞
❝   you always did have a high opinion of yourself. ❞
❝   i’m not a young man anymore. ❞
❝  still trying to play hero? ❞
❝  i sometimes wonder if your height is why you’re always in such a bad mood. ❞
❝  this is no place for children. ❞
❝  the world could always use more heroes. ❞
❝  looked in a mirror lately? ❞
❝  Me one, bad guys zero. ❞
❝  i’m gonna have to shoot you down. ❞
❝  this old dog has learned a few tricks. ❞
❝  another one off the list. ❞
❝  i love your glasses, so cute! ❞
❝  if at first you don’t succeed…blow it up again! ❞
❝  that’s for my family back home! ❞
❝  i’ve got you in my sights. ❞
❝  i’m the one who does his job. i’m thinking… you’re the other one. ❞
❝   you weren’t given those guns to toss them away like trash. ❞
❝   i will protect the innocent. ❞ 

2

t l o t c cmost underrated character  →  baghra morozova

“Before he’d ever dreamed of a Second Army, before he gave up his name and became the Darkling, he was just a brilliant, talented boy. I gave him his ambition. I gave him his pride. When the time came, I should have been the one to stop him.” She smiled then, a small smile of such aching sadness that it was hard to look at. “You think I don’t love my son,” she said. “But I do. It is because I love him that I will not let him put himself beyond redemption.

Sentence Starters

A collection of lines from books, movies, tv shows, songs, and popular tumblr text posts.

“When everyone knows you’re a monster, you needn’t waste time doing every monstrous thing.”

“Let’s say I had to resort to… aggressive negotiations.” 

“I was lightly stabbed! Lightly!”

“You’ve never seen anything like this before? Goddamn. I thought you’ve seen everything.”

“Let me see if I understand: Neither of us know what this thing is, correct? What do you say we intentionally antagonize it to see what it can do?”

“Are you going mad? Neat! Maybe things will finally get interesting around here.”

“If you’re seeing that too, then I’m currently not hallucinating. What in God’s name is that thing, by the way?”

“Listen to me: If you continue doing that, you will die.”

“Your heart is filled with bitterness.”

“I hope you will find peace one day.”

“The solution to this and most other problems is fire. Set it on fire. Burn everything to the ground.”

“I am so tired that I could sleep for centuries and still feel exhausted when I wake.”

“Do you ever look in the mirror and start to feel unreal? Because that’s been happening to me lately. Nothing feels real.”

“I feel like I’m going to fade away someday.”

“Having a body is so strange.”

“I want to run away. I don’t know how to fix this, so I want to run and run until I can’t anymore.”

“I’m a coward. I’m a damned coward.”

“I can’t do this on my own. Please help me. Please. I promise I will repay you.”

“Not to be melodramatic but my heart aches and my soul is dying.”

“Today I explored the void. The void, as you might want to know, is not as void as some think. Anyway, enough about me. What have you done recently?”

“My friends, my comrades, my fellow saints and sinners…  Today I must inform you of a terrible thing.”

“I suggest we start a revolution.”

“There is something horrifyingly wrong with you.”

“He who dies here dies in the radiance of the future, and we are entering a tomb all flooded with the dawn.”

“Even false saints have power.”

“I found a door. A door to another world.”

“Nothing will stand against us.”

“Tell me what you’ve done.”

“They are beyond redemption, as you will be if you do this.”

“Do monsters make war, or does war make monsters?”

“Such acts rip out the soul and make space for beasts to grow inside.”

“You tell me that battling with monsters has made me a monster? Doing business with devils, what has that made you?”

“I have repented, I have been punished enough, take me home…”

“My soul is clean. I’ve never killed anyone. But you, oh you. Look at your hands.”

“Wishes are false. Hope is true. Hope makes its own magic.”

“Take all my pain away.”

“Start the Apocalypse with me.”

“Together, we are unstoppable. Nothing and no one will stand in our way.”

“You are a shining light in the darkness.”

“Oh yes, you go do that. Great idea, I’m sure you’ll be perfectly fine!”

“I will follow you to the ends of the earth and beyond.”

“Must you point that thing at me? Please put it down.”

“Think about it. Just stop for a moment.”

“My heart hurts so much I want to tear it out.”

“That’s not what I said.”

Nothing else mattered

It’s been quite a while since I wrote my last Supernatural meta. Some days ago I answered an ask where I said that time constraints were among the reasons why I hadn’t written much lately. The other powerful reason was lack of inspiration. The thing is that after watching episode 12x14, I felt that I simply HAD TO write about something in particular, no matter what. I haven’t had time to read any meta for this episode, and that’s a good thing because it means this is my opinion without anybody else’s influence. Without further ado, let’s talk about the part of the episode that inspired me to write again.  

Other more talented meta writers have previously stated that Mary’s arc this season parallels Cas’ arc in season 6. I totally agree. The whole “Mary is working with the BMoL and keeping it from Dean and Sam” is the same thing Cas did when he was secretly working with Crowley. At least, the writers are trying to undo some things from season 6 because in this case Mary decided to confess to her sons what she was doing without being forced. However, if somebody still had doubts that Mary is a Cas parallel, in this episode there was a very explicit shout-out to a memorable scene between Dean and Cas: Mary literally told Dean, “I’m doing this for you.” I know she meant both Winchesters, but she was talking directly to Dean in that scene. Besides, where have we heard those exacts words before?

There was something else that was very relevant almost at the end of the episode. If we’re keeping in mind that Mary is a Cas parallel, how much of what Dean said to Mary applied to Cas around 6 years ago? The thing is that Dean never expressed what he felt at that time, but he did it now. The fact that he’s trying to talk about his feelings is huge character development for Dean.

What did Dean say to Mary?

“The moment I thought something bad had happened to you, nothing else mattered.”

That pretty much explains this from episode 7x01:

It also explains why Dean was so worried and desperate when he thought Cas was dead, to the point where he told Bobby that maybe angels didn’t need to breathe. It explains why when Dean realized Cas was alive, he didn’t focus on being pissed.

Dean didn’t tell Cas there was no way to redeem himself. He didn’t decide to leave him right there; Dean actually wanted to take Cas with them. Why? Dean was hurt deeply by what Cas did, and didn’t like the choices Cas made. The same happened with Mary. Dean didn’t like the choices she made and was really hurt by them. However, when Dean thought that something bad could happen to Mary, nothing else mattered. There was no betrayal important enough to prevent him from running to her rescue.

That’s what happened back in season 7’s premiere. The moment Dean thought that something bad could happen to Cas, nothing else mattered. Nothing Cas had done was beyond redemption. The idea of losing the person he loves hurts Dean a lot more than accepting the choices the person makes. That’s why Dean forgave Cas in season 7, no matter what.

Of course, many of us already knew that Cas meant a lot to Dean even back then. I’m just glad the subtext of season 12 is somehow explaining things that happened so long ago in the show. If season 12 continues like this, I might feel inspired enough to keep writing as often as I used to. 

Why does everyone suddenly think that Luke is the chosen one, and that Disney are completely rewriting the major plot details? Can you not think about anything except what’s directly in front of you?

This does not make Luke the chosen one, that fact has not changed. It’s still Anakin. The reason Obi-wan says this is because he believes that Luke is the chosen one. He’s been betrayed by Anakin, he’s seen his fall and the atrocities that he’s commited. He honestly thinks that the only way to stop Vader is to kill him, that Anakin is beyond saving, beyond redemption. And if he was, if Luke killed him and the Emperor like Obi-wan thought he had to, he’d be right.

But Anakin is turned, he is redeemed by his son. It’s still Anakin who destroys the Sith, as it was he destroyed the Jedi.

Anakin is still the chosen one, Obi-wan just doesn’t believe it, it wouldn’t make sense for him to still believe it. It’s not bad writing, or retconning by Disney

Anakin is still the chosen one.

(unless Disney is now saying that Luke actually is the chosen one, which is stupid. But I really don’t think that they are.)

I have exactly one of two feeder moods at any given time

1.) “Oh my, look how swollen your stomach is now~ You’ve eaten so much for me; I’m so proud of you.. But you’re not done yet! The only way you can rest is by falling into a food coma. I want your belly drum-tight, so big and heavy it’s pressing on your lungs, making it hard to breathe. You’ll look so adorably vulnerable, moaning from being stuffed to the gills with sooo much food, but I promise to shower your exhausted body with the rubs and kisses you so very much earned <3″

2.) “unnhghyes sqUIsH me///”

Buffy still means something to me, and it’s okay if you feel that way, too.

I need to add my two cents to the Joss Whedon discourse I see floating around. If you’re not aware, I’m referring to the essay his ex-wife, Kai Cole, submitted to The Wrap, detailing his track record of infidelity, as well as other recent bad press, such as the leaked excerpts from his unused Wonder Woman script, which included dialogue and characterization that many found to be problematic beyond understanding. 

I, personally, found the script to be problematic, too. I’m hesitant to jump on the condemnation bandwagon on the issue of infidelity, because I think our culture fosters white, male empowerment and encourages dishonesty and shame when it comes to sexual expression, and the issue is far too big to be tackled in a blog post. I’m not excusing his alleged actions, by any means. Dishonesty and infidelity and abuse of power are terrible, and people deserve to be judged for them. I understand why so many people are rushing to condemn this man who branded himself a feminist and then revealed himself to be deeply flawed in so many ways.

I’m not writing to criticize anyone for thinking that way, but I am extending a hand to anyone else who feels conflicted while considering this information.

I was ten years old when Buffy the Vampire Slayer first aired. I didn’t even know the name of the man who created it, back then, and probably didn’t for at least a couple of seasons. If intimate details were available online about the showrunners and the cast at that time, I didn’t know to look for them. I didn’t read press releases about it. I didn’t spend hours sifting through blog posts dissecting every episode, critiquing every character arc and line of dialogue, if such blog posts even existed. I watched it, in the absence of all the noise and conflicting opinions that accompany the viewing experience today. And the show affected me deeply.

Buffy was the first fictional character I really saw as a hero. I understood that she was brave and selfless, despite being portrayed as terrified, and grief-stricken, and often deeply flawed herself. And she was a woman, who could beat the life out of pretty much anyone she met, if she so chose. She was powerful, all on her own, and she took that power seriously.

I’m not saying the show wasn’t flawed. It was. Deeply, at times. (Hopefully you’re starting to pick up on the trend here.) But it spoke to me. It taught me things. It stuck with me for years - the pain of it; the bittersweet victories; the early lgbtq+ representation; the images of Buffy killing the person she loved most in the world to save everyone else, or digging her way out of her own grave with her bare hands because her friends couldn’t face the notion of living without her. These ideas took hold in my heart before I cared about who created the show, or what that person might be like. And because of that, I’ve come to this conclusion.

Media can be both problematic and valuable.

Given what I’ve learned about Joss Whedon since I was an impressionable ten-year-old, I do believe it’s my responsibility to bring a more critical eye to the content he’s created. Shows I once loved might look and feel different to me, now, and they should. And I know I should be hesitant to endorse future creative projects by Joss Whedon, and to think more critically about his casting choices, his character arcs, and his dialogue, if I encounter media he creates in the future.

But I don’t believe it’s my responsibility to condemn every piece of content he’s ever created, just because he’s proven himself to be flawed as a human being. I can love Buffy, and what the show once meant to me, and still be critical of it. I can enjoy the ideas and the characters from Angel, and Firefly, and Dollhouse, and understand that they might be as flawed as their creator.

Media can be both problematic and valuable.

So if you’re like me - trying to reconcile your love and appreciation of this content with what you’ve learned about this man - please know that you’re not alone. You’re not bad because you were once inspired by these works. You’re not evil if you still find comfort and enjoyment in spending time with these characters. You don’t have to erase your connection to them in order to believe in equality, or to support feminism, or to encourage fairness and integrity in media. Joss Whedon didn’t turn out to be the hero we wanted him to be, and it’s okay to be disappointed in him, and critical of him. If you’ve followed his content, you’ve probably spent plenty of time being critical of his charactrs, too. Buffy certainly wasn’t a perfect hero. Neither was Willow, or Angel, or Wesley, or Mal. And their villain counterparts were equally multifaceted - Spike, and Faith, and DeWitt - flawed, seemingly beyond redemption, until they revealed themselves to be perfectly, disturbingly, human. 

Problematic characters are at the heart of good media. They force us to think critically, to adjust our views and expectations of ourselves, and of each other. And characters with this depth are often created by people who understand what it means to be flawed and conflicted - to be the hero sometimes, and to sometimes be the villain.

And this story isn’t a new one. “White Man Working in a Flawed System Possessing Immense Power Abuses It” - this should not be a surprising headline, anymore. I can’t possibly know all of the intimate details of his abuses, or his marriage, or his affairs, and neither can you, but yes, we should be critical. If you feel like your personal solution is to blacklist Joss Whedon and every piece of media he’s ever created, you’re entitled to do so.

But it’s not okay for you to tell me I have to do the same. I can condemn infidelity and misogyny and abuse of power, and still love the characters this man created. 

I can condemn the man, and still love the hero Buffy was to me.

I have come to the conclusion that Percy and Scanlan are two halves of the same coin; simultaneously very different and very similar.

- Both lost their family and believed themselves to be alone in the world
- Both discovered that they still had a family member left in this world
- Both believed themselves beyond redemption until falling in love and striving to become a better person for that other person
- Both very egotistical
- Both represent a form of intelligence/knowledge: Percy is book/academic knowledge, whereas Scanlan is worldy/experience knowledge
- Both suffered from some form of depression and as a result acted out to purposefully hurt others
- Scanlan comes from poverty while Percy comes from nobility
- Percy is of the sciences while Scanlan is of magic
- Both have a tendency to keep secrets and not talk about their true feelings (Percy has gotten better about this but only with Vex)