When you’re favorite #curvygoddesses fck it!!!
Last nights @prettybigmovement - move your curves heels workshop up in NYC!
These women are not only SEXY but amazing human beings thank you again for the unconditional amount of love & support you continue to give me. #iamprettyBIG
I do not have the curves of Beyonce, the willowiness of Lupita, the fit-thickness of Serena. And I know it. I stare in the mirror everyday and wish for something different, something better. I started my weightloss journey almost two years ago. I finally said enough was enough and that something had to change. At my best, I’ve lost 20 pounds. I lost it and then figured my job was done. I stopped going to the gym and started eating Talenti. 5 pounds came back, my stomach isn’t flat. Now I have a weekend getaway looming on the horizon to one of the most superficial cities in this country and all I can do is panic.
To be perfectly honest with you, despite not having the body I think every other SB has, I’m relatively happy with the progress that my body has made and where I am now. I know I’ve come a long way. I know I have excellent arms, legs that won’t quit, an ass to mesmerize. But I don’t have the stomach I want. And I don’t quite have love handles but something is there on my lower back. Love knobs? Love drawer pulls? Whatever it is, I don’t want to bare it all on the beach but I don’t really have a choice. Or at least I don’t think that I have much of a choice. I am already mentally in competition with every fit woman that comes across my dash. Can you imagine the amount of self inflicted torture I’ll put myself through in real time? Can you imagine my embarrassment if I don’t compete at all?
The worst part is, I don’t wish I had stayed away from Talenti. Talenti is delicious. I wish I had stayed in the gym more. I wish I could just commit to something and stay committed. The fact that after almost two years I still don’t have the body I want feels like another failure. It’s another thing to throw on the pile of things that I just couldn’t stick to. Another one of those things that I could have had if I’d just stuck to it. Like sugaring.
Like sugaring, it’s probably best that instead of focusing on all of the things I did wrong, all of the times I gave up, to instead focus on all of the things I did right. I lost the weight once. I can lose it again. I just have to focus on today. I just have to stop competing with women that don’t even see me and recognize that the body I have now, covered in loose clothing was intriguing enough for a man to buy a plane ticket, suitcase, and things to fill that suitcase with. He knows I’m trying to lose weight and still wants to touch me. I can ignore that. I can continue to worry. I can project my thoughts onto him and potentially push him away or at the very least make him uncomfortable. Or I can recognize that it’s okay that at this moment I don’t think my body is a wonderland. But I do recognize that it’s mine. And I need to be kinder to the things that are mine.
The best thing I can say to young ladies is accept the body you’re in. If you have curves, love your curves. The thing to strive for is to have the best healthy body you can have. It’s really not about being skinny or being curvy. What matters is that you love yourself and you are taking care of your health.