LOVED your fic recs! You mentioned that you had runner-ups, what are they? I'm curious because we have similar fic tastes and I've read most on your list.
Thanks mate! I’m glad you appreciated that and yes, I was originally going to post 15 fics, but I cut it down to 10 because I’m a lazy bastard. The following are honorable mentions to my treasure trove (or part two, view it anyway you want.)
Author’s Description: Stuck in the Enchanted Forest after her wish was granted, Emma seeks out Killian. She doesn’t expect what she finds.
Rose’s Review: If I were a bigger cunt than I already am, I would just download this fic and sent it to A&E and be like “See this? This is what you should have done you bloody fucking wankers instead of going for the laugh!” (I’m not bitter I promise.) This isn’t just amazingly crafted Captain Swan smut, it’s amazingly crafted Captain Swan smut that rips out your heart and makes you weep for Wish!Hook because he’s just so unhappy but so gracious and in love with Emma (all Killians are in love with all Emma’s, let’s just face it). He really could have been bitter but he’s just so accepting and encouraging of Emma and his main verse self that it makes you want to curl in a corner with a bottle of rosé and weep to “White Flag” by Dido. It doesn’t make you cry because it’s angsty, it makes you cry because they just fucking love each other so much and Wish!Hook kinda gets the raw deal because he has no Emma of his own. He arguably doesn’t really exist but you still feel bad because despite the fact he was unhappy that doesn’t mean he didn’t have a good heart. Ugh. Just read it and have feels.
And here we are with another Invader Zim reaction. I’ve been told this episode was pretty fucked up, even by this show’s standards, so I’m excited.
And now we have a stuffed rabbit in a jar. At least I THINK it’s stuffed. It doesn’t look real, but you can never tell on this show.
“My organs!” The best reaction to pain.
“I’ve got a squeedlyspooch.” OH MY GOD GAZ
Hmm…now who exactly are these guys? They look like military, and they have some kind of tablet device, but they seem to be delivery guys of some sort.
Yeah, I think Dib went farther than he intended with that speech.
“You’ve got head pigeons!” Okay, 1) how did she not notice it fly in, but 2) never before have I so badly wanted to know the details of a disease as with “head pigeons”.
Oooookay, now we’ve got fucking exploding collars serving as hall passes. I think we’re bordering on Danganronpa 3 territory at this point.
I have a hard time understanding how all those classrooms can be so close to one another.
“Say…you’re full of organs, aren’t you?” DON’T ANSWER THAT, RANDOM KID; IT’S A TRICK QUESTION
AAAAAND Zim just replaced one of that kid’s organs with a suicide collar that will explode when he leaves the school. I’d say I was surprised, but at this point I’d say I’m probably used to it; this show is fucking intense.
The pencil scene is absolutely perfect.
“He’s missing his liver. That’s how some people react to the cafeteria food. The lucky ones.” Yeah, the food at my school cafeteria was pretty much like that.
Was that dog food? EDIT: Actually, I think it was soda.
Well, there goes the hall pass.
Man, Zim worked fast. I feel like he actually gets MORE competent in episodes where Dib IS present.
…and now there’s a cat. In a place. I don’t want to say exactly what I think the joke is supposed to be; I’ll just say that I am ASTOUNDED Cartoon Network let them get away with that.
Yeah, starting to spot a flaw in Zim’s plan.
“I’ve been working out!” That is literally the exact opposite of how that works, Zim.
I can’t decide whether Zim slurping up “his” large intestine like a spaghetti noodle is the funniest or most horrifying thing I’ve ever seen. Probably both.
I am not at all comfortable with that squelching sound.
Why does this random classroom have pickled organs, taxidermied hawks, and- oh yeah- a barrel of radioactive waste? I mean, two of those would make sense if this was the biology room, but we already saw that was somewhere else, PLUS it still wouldn’t explain the goddamn radioactive fucking waste, would it?
This is actually getting pretty intense. See, Zim episode climaxes tend to be either really cool or impossibly anticlimactic; it’s hard to tell which one they’ll go for.
Wait, what did he actually do to him?
Yeah, that’s about right for Dib.
Wow, they were not kidding. This was a really fucking twisted episode. I love it.
wonder how weak he really is. like, he is immortal? but what dos that
mean… i mean before mythal gives him her like, life force
I’m sorry in advance as that’s way too much lore to dig up so I
have nowhere near the energy to try to link the sources, I’ll be
relying on your familiarity with the lore I’m sorryyyy, also omg it’s so long I hope it makes sense oh no
Long story short : memories, it’s always about memories
Short story long : Nothing in Thedas is immortal, or at least
nothing I can recall of. People are killed, Archdemons are killed,
Titans are killed, even Corypheus who had achieved effective
immortality is eventually killed (it took two games but still). Then
come spirits and the infamous All New Faded for Her quest. Spirits
can be killed, but Solas tells you she might be able to reform. Solas
actually tells us on several occasions that spirits form to mirror
the thoughts and emotions from the waking side, and in the same way,
if the feelings are strong enough, their essence is able to reappear
Now bringing Arlathan in, the city full of magic, so full of magic
half of it lies in the fade and spirits are somewhat part of the
elven society. I believe in the headcanon that the original elvhen
actually came from spirits and I’ll be using this in this post.
The Evanuris were using vallaslin to bind people to their will,
some would wage war in the sole purpose of gaining more worshippers,
and a lot of other obnoxious stuff we can read in codices, alright.
But what if there was actually an actual practical purpose™ to this
: the more people are devoted to you – the more feelings you gather
– the more you’re guaranted an immortality of sorts, and I might
extend it to ‘the more powerful you get’ just like this nightmare
demon we meet and his fear. That would explain the whole godhood
thing : they were generals at first, and upon victory people started
liking them a bit too much, they got so strong overtime they ended up
just the same as gods. They strove for power and they kept wanting
more, more, to the point they were about to do something that would
destroy everything and Solas had to stop them.
So Fen'harel was in Uthenera the whole time so him being alive is
very easy to accept, but what about Mythal ? There’s been fusing with
Flémeth and using bodies as hosts, but Mythal’s soul surviving so
long is still questionning.
There’s that the evanuris worshipping has never really stopped. I
have the feeling that it almost did and had weakened greatly before
suddenly getting brought back to life but I can’t recall clearly and
I’m terrible with years. There’s also this very suspicious dalish
Keeper, Gisharel, who’s quoted as the author of a huge lot of
important codex entries regarding the evanuris, there’s the
possibility that at some moment one of them, either the locked ones
or Mythal herself, used him to bring the religion back on its feet so
that they wouldn’t lose their everything just like this. If it’s from
a locked evanuris, it’s even easier to imagine how Fen'harel would be
only depicted as the evil trickster.
Solas asks (begs) Cole in banter to remember Wisdom the way he
would. In the fade, things are shaped according to everyone’s
perception and there is no one single Truth™ in these, everything
is equally real as it’s real for the people it was formed off.
Feelings and memories are critical to allow a spirit to survive
death, but their accuracy seems just as important, or the spirit
would lose it’s original purpose and turn twisted. I believe that,
when Mythal was killed, her numerous worshippers were grieving and
raging to such extent that she reformed soon after, but almost fully
as vengeance and not really justice anymore. This theory helps me
greatly with understanding the ambiguity of Solas reactions to her,
'she’s great, the best, luv her forever but oh my god don’t you ever
get bound to her that’s the worst thing that could happen to u omg
no’ kind of thing (and regarding the well apparently he was supposed
to protest even more in the game but these lines didn’t make it to
the final product). This way it just makes so much more sense to me
So now that I put all of this down I can finally answer (help me
lol) : Solas can die but not Fen'harel. The dalish don’t entertain
the memory of his battles, of his rebellion, of freeing the people :
they only remember about tearing the world apart, breaking the
eternity of their lives, weakening Arlathan to the point Tevinter
could just march on it, and every single bad thing ever existing.
Fen'harel is evil, so evil one just has to build a statue of him to
chase demons away from the clan. It’s possible to ask for his help
but it’s a huge risk as he always find a way to torment everyone, and
he relishes it.
Now he’s got the lifeforce of Flémythal so his essence is
powerful enough to keep living on for a while, but despite this, (and you asked about his time before getting it) if he were to die
what kind of spirit could reform from this mess ? Certainly not
Solas. Sure he’s got his agents and a bunch of ancient elves who were
there back then, but could it win against millenias of a heinous
projected persona ?
That could be the point of the current massive
disappearence of elven people all across Thedas (even if up to now I
thought it was only Mythal’s doing, but her lifeforce is with him so
actually there’s a LOT of different possibilities there, I won’t
detail it as it would take me way too far lol #da4HYPE)
But one thing’s for sure, WE MUST PROTECT HHIIIMMMM AAAHHHH
PS : Now please take a moment to reconsider his « I’ll never forget
you » line. You’re welcome.
Clarke couldn’t stop laughing because Lexa was being a total goof about everything, clearly a little drunk already and in a very silly mood. They were in a small booth in some bar near Lexa’s place. It was all dark, with music that was loud enough to hear, but not so loud it killed conversation. Clarke liked the chilled, intimate atmosphere and the cocktails. Clarke had insisted they get cocktails and Lexa was more than happy to go along with the plan. Clarke stared at Lexa - pouty lips around a straw as she sucked on her Pina Colada. Clarke had insisted on Pina Coladas - mainly because she had the Pina Colada song in her head. Lexa didn’t seem to sure about the taste because every time she took a sip her brow pursed a little making Clarke smile. Not for the first time she marvelled at Lexa’s beauty - dark hair all wavy, tank showing off an incredibly sexy arm tattoo. Clarke didn’t know if she wanted to be Lexa or just be near to her.
‘You don’t have to drink it if you don’t like it,’ she tapped Lexa’s fingers where they were gripping the glass, her finger fizzing slightly at the contact with Lexa’s. Clarke ignored that
‘Oh I’ve drunk it,’ she pushed the glass away and smiled. ‘But I’m ordering the next lot.’
'As long as you can come up with a reason for your choice, then ok,’ Clarke smirked.
'A reason?’ Lexa smiled - it was a beautiful smile and it never failed to bring a smile to Clarke’s face. 'What sort of reason do we need to have this time?’
'You like my games Lexa, don’t pretend otherwise.’
'Yes, only drinking drinks served on fire was fun,’ Lexa nodded, 'though I preferred the only pink drinks night.’
'Well tonight is drinks from songs. Hence our pina coladas!’
'You chose it because you can’t stop singing the damn song, right?’ Lexa giggled.
'Exactly. I’m hoping by drinking the damn drink I can stop trying to <em>Escape</em>…’
'It took me a while to work out the song, you know?’ Lexa teased and Clarke eyed her warily before whacking her arm softly,
'Haha, don’t make fun of my singing, we can’t all be rock stars,’ and she poked out her tongue cheekily.
'Your singing voice is very sexy,’ Lexa leaned a little closer and Clarke found herself staring into green eyes. Who the hell had actual green eyes? And a pretty voice? And a perfectly constructed face?
'Because it’s all deep and raspy?’ Clarke had heard it before and managed to sound slightly condescending.
'Nah, because you get all the words wrong and that’s adorable,’ Lexa announced and sat back.
'I don’t get the words wrong,’ Clarke protested indignantly.
’If you like making love at midnight with a dude in a cape;…’ Lexa sand and Clarke nodded,
'It’s a superhero reference, right?’
'No, the line is actually “in the dunes of the cape” - sex in the sand dunes.’
'Oh,’ Clarke frowned and Lexa grinned at her. 'Isn’t that a little gritty?’
'If you’re not careful, yeah.’
'Have you ever?’ Clarke waggled her eyebrows leaning forward, as ever desperate to hear what Lexa would say. She was quite honestly a little amazed Lexa was single.
'Yes,’ Lexa said and Clarke watched the blush trail across her cheekbones, entranced for a moment. 'Have you?’
'No,’ she shook her head, breaking her trance. 'Was it gritty?’
'Hmm, no…it was fine. We had a blanket and well…no…all good,’ Lexa mumbled and Clarke loved how embarrassed she was - it made her want to know more.
'Tell me about your ex-boyfriends,’ she stated and then shook her head, 'actually tell me about your last ex-boyfriend,’ she smiled and took a sip of her drink, feeling slightly awful for prying when Lexa’s face fell. She looked, for want of a better word - stunned, like she was fighting off the urge to cry or something. She somehow managed to pull it all together, taking a deep breath and schooling her expression. Her teeth sinking into her bottom lip as she stared at Clarke was the only thing that betrayed her emotions. Clarke also didn’t think she’d ever seen Lexa’s eyes quite so wide.
She instantly assumed the worst, 'Oh my god, was it a terrible breakup? I’m sorry,’ she rushed to say feeling terrible for prying. She was insanely comfortable with Lexa and it felt like they’d known each other for ages, but the girl was a new friend and she worried she may have crossed the line with her question.
'No, no it wasn’t,’ Lexa managed a small wry smile. 'My ex girlfriend and I are actually still friends,’ she squinted a little, clearly unsure of the reaction she’d get from her friend. Clarke felt mortification rip through her and slapped her hands over her face, fairly convinced she was as red as a tomato or something much, much redder. She was utterly embarrassed, her stomach twisting uncomfortably and she ignored the weird thrill she felt in relation to the revelation, shoving it aside firmly. She knew that this was probably not the best reaction but was too surprised to pay heed to that knowledge.
'Oh my god you’re gay! God I’m such a dumbass,’ she trilled into her hands. Why hadn’t Lexa told her? She felt her stomach flip as it occurred to her that Lexa might have thought they were dating. But no, she’d never made a move. Lexa had been strictly platonic. Clarke wondered why she’d never made a move? Probably because Clarke was straight. That had to be why. Clarke felt the vibe between them and fine, she was crushing pretty hard, but she was straight, and therefore Lexa was clearly only into friendship and so was she. 'Fuck Lexa, you could have told me,’ she mumbled, still humiliated.
'I just did,’ Lexa chuckled softly.
'You don’t look gay at all,’ she dropped her hands and stared at Lexa - beautiful Lexa, Lexa who had ex-girlfriends, and touched boobs. Lexa who had sex with girls and dated them.
'No Clarke, no,’ Lexa shook her head and Clarke instantly realized that there were about a millions things wrong with what she had just said and threw her hands back over her face, her skin even redder she was sure,
'God I didn’t mean that. I’m saying everything wrong, shit. I know. You just didn’t say anything?’ Why hadn’t Lexa said anything? Clarke knew it wouldn’t have made any difference when they first met and it wouldn’t now, but she wished she’d known.
'Well I didn’t hide it either,’ Lexa shrugged and Clarke considered that. No maybe not. There was the rainbow flag on her guitar and that sticker she’d never entirely understood that said “I’m just saying…if it wasn’t meant to be eaten it wouldn’t be shaped like a taco” the meaning dawning on Clarke in an instant and only compounding her embarrassment. She rubbed her face and willed away her pink cheeks, and her ridiculously inappropriate thoughts of Lexa having sex with faceless women. She had so many questions - what type of girl was even Lexa’s type? It felt like she might be flirting with the inappropriate again if she went asked if Lexa liked butch girls or what?
'Ok, God, let me stop being an idiot,’ she heaved in a breath and tried to calm down. 'Tell me about your last ex girlfriend.’
Lexa eyed her uncertainly, as if checking her for disgust or horror, neither of which Clarke felt - she was just embarrassed at her own reaction - the shock and in all honesty the thrill that went through her at the revelation - the latter emotion both weird and confusing. It was not that it was the first time she’d felt attraction to a girl, and Lexa was an extremely attractive girl - she just couldn’t imagine actually doing anything with her - that was kind of gross, so why would she feel that thrill? Not that sex with girls was gross to Lexa apparently. Clarke shook her head as the thrill went through her again - it was all off topic because they were friends and nothing more. Lexa was gay and she hadn’t made a move. Clarke was straight. Friends.
'You sure? You’re looking kinda shaky there…’ Lexa gave her such a Lexa smile that Clarke laughed a little,
'I’m sure. But first order us another drink by song title and then I want to hear all about…’ she waited expectantly.
'Costia,’ Lexa replied lips pursed in amusement that was undoubtedly due was sure Clarke’s flustered aura at that moment. <em>Costia</em>. Clarke rolled the name around in her head and tried to picture a girl that went with a name like that. Her brow furrowed. She was sure Costia had been just lovely but her name was a little irritating. And she couldn’t have been all that great if she was Lexa’s ex. Clarke was shaken from her thoughts when the waitress arrived.
'More drinks girls?’
Clarke looked to Lexa expectantly, watching the girl give an evil little grin,
'Two beers please, Stella if you have it.’
'Sure,’ the waitress nodded.
’Beers Lexa?’ Clarke scoffed - beer was such a cop out - dozens of songs had beer in the title.
'From the Toby Keith song, “I like girls that drink beer,”’ Lexa was clearly trying to hide her smile and Clarke couldn’t help but laugh, because Lexa was an adorable, smart, dork. The song she’d chosen just after coming out to her friend had the words “I like girls” in the title. She was a genius. She’d even ordered fucking Stella. 'It’s not my kinda song at all…very country, very straight, but it works,’ and then she winked and Clarke’s heart thundered, especially when Lexa began to sing in a sexy southern drawl, ’I need a little down home lovin’, And a girl ain’t gonna get it up here, Hey, I’ll find what I want in a honky tonk, I like girls that drink beer…’ She finished and made the silliest expression with her face and Clarke started to giggle,
'You’re just the greatest girl,’ she told her with utter sincerity and enthusiasm, taking her hand and squeezing it.
'I thought it worked well with the conversation we just had,’ Lexa blushed at the compliment, squeezing Clarke’s hand before letting go. Clarke wondered if she let go to make it clear they were platonic. Which obviously they were but Lexa didn’t need to make that clear.
'Nicely done,’ Clarke pulled out her phone and snapped a photo of Lexa looking all shy but pleased, cheeks wonderfully pink. 'Now tell me the tale of the ex-girlfriend.’
Never have I seen a movie with a naked woman done in a less-sexualised way than Mad Max. Usually, when there are women who are in any way even partially naked, I am gritting my teeth until it’s over. But in Mad Max, I was literally on the edge of my seat, because the naked female character was so amazingly non-sexual. I don’t think I’ve ever seen a movie do that before. I was starting to think you couldn’t put a naked woman in a movie and not make it sexual.
And oh my god Max’s reaction was the best. Not even a moment of gawping. Not even him trying to get a closer look, or a shot of him glancing at her as she scrambles (still naked) to reach their group. Not even a shot of him looking away to preserve her modesty (because while it would be way out of character and better than him perving at her, when a character does that it does serve the purpose of sexualising the naked woman as much as if they were staring at her).
but we didn’t get any of that. Just the words “that’s bait” because obviously it is, why else would a woman be naked and waiting for them on top of a high (and sort of phallic-like structure) if not to be bait. because it wouldn’t be anything else. but oh my god was i not expecting that scene to be treated in such an amazing way because i’ve literally never seen that in a movie before
Imagine it’s Christmas Eve, and you’re sitting on your couch, watching your boyfriend, Niall, put up the Christmas lights on the tree.
“Move it up a little higher,” you tell him.
“Gee thanks for the help babe,” Niall says sarcastically, a smile spreading across his face.
“You’re welcome!” you chuckle. You did ask him if he needed help, but he had insisted that he do all the work. He wanted to celebrate your third Christmas together. What a dork. A cute dork, but a dork nonetheless.
Finally, he steps down from the ladder and turns to face you.
“What do you think?” he asks excitedly, gesturing to the beautiful tree.
“They’re perfect Niall,” you tell him earnestly. “This is gonna be the best Christmas ever.”
“Alright!” he exclaims, clearly proud of himself.
You laugh; his excitable personality makes you feel all warm and fuzzy inside. You love spending time with him, almost as much as you love him.
“I’ll be right back,” he tells you, heading into the kitchen.
“What are you doing?” you call.
“Making my princess a surprise!” he calls back.
You blush. “Princess” always makes you feel all flustered. Niall always knows how to make you feel special, and this time is no different.
Niall returns with two, steaming mugs of hot chocolate, topped high with whipped cream, and he even added some holiday sprinkles.
“Ooooo festive!” you say as he hands you one of the mugs.
“Festive is my middle name,” he jokes. He sets down his own mug on the coffee table and tends the fire until it’s bright and warm.
“There,” he says, coming over to sit beside you. “Nice and cozy.”
You rest your head on his chest, and he puts his arm around you. You sit there for a while, sipping your hot chocolate, and feeling warm and fuzzy inside. This must be what people are talking about when they say “holiday cheer” because damn do you feel cheerful right now.
Suddenly, you get an idea. “Babe we have to exchange presents!”
“But tomorrow is Christmas Day,” he points out. “That’s when we’re supposed to open presents.”
“Yeah well we get to open one present on Christmas Eve,” you inform him. “That’s the rule.”
He laughs. “Oh is it?”
“Yes. Now let me go so I can give you your present.”
He chuckles, but releases you for his firm grip. You rush over to the tree and grab the biggest box. You hand it to Niall and he tears it open. You wait to watch his reaction excitedly. You knew you picked the best present ever.
“Oh my god!” he exclaims. He opens the package and he pulls out the most incredible guitar. “I can’t believe it!”
“You were eyeing it at the music store,” you tell him, “so I thought you’d like it.”
“Like it? I love it!” he says, starting to play the guitar.
As he’s playing, you hear a small bark and a quick pitter-patter of paws on tile. You laugh; its your cute little puppy coming over to Niall. He just loves listening to Niall play the guitar.
Your dog comes into the living room and hops into Niall’s lap.
“Hi boy!” says Niall, petting your dog. He barks in delight, loving every moment of Niall’s attention. You can definitely relate.
Niall smiles at you and holds the cute puppy up. “Isn’t he the cutest?”
“I guess,” you say with a giggle. “But you definitely give him a run for his money.”
“Awe babe that was cute,” Niall says.
“Cute is my middle name.”
“I thought it was-”
“SHHHHH,” you say, playfully covering his mouth with your hand. “It’s cute.”
Niall laughs. “Whatever you say babe.”
Your dog hops off Niall’s lap and goes off to another room, clearly bored now that the guitar is sitting unused on the floor. Oh well, at least you were truly alone again.
“Babe it’s time for your present,” says Niall nervously as he reaches into his pocket.
Your heart stops. Niall pulls out a small, black box.
He gets down on one knee and says, “I love you so much. These past three years together have been the best of my life. Three magical Christmas’ with the most amazing girl in the world. And I want every single one of my future Christmas’ to be with you. So… Will you marry me?”
The tears are flowing freely as he opens the box to reveal a beautiful diamond ring.
“Yes…” you whisper. “Of course I’ll marry you.”
You have barely enough time to register Niall’s enormous smile before he engulfs you in a huge bear hug.
“I love you baby,” he whispers in your ear.
“I love you too,” you respond wholeheartedly. “Merry Christmas.”