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This is Penelope, the opossum at the zoo where I work l, sitting in her “weight bucket” so we can keep track of how much she weighs. She is a very good girl.

That is all. I hope this beautiful opossum made your day a little better.

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Fancy dinner dates spent pocketing breadsticks and silverware. I give it twenty minutes tops before they either get kicked out or decide on skipping the tab.

How Dan and Phil probably broke up #43
  • Dan: *sacrifices Phil to Satan*