I am not good for you. (Part 4)
Pairing: Jace Herondale/Wayland/Lightwood X Reader.
A/N: there is Clary too but this is a Jace x Reader, sorry for who ship Clace. I ship Clace also 💕but this imagine is based on a dream i made a few nights ago. And also i’m sorry for any mistakes, English isn’t my first language and i wanted to share this with someone.
“Wow…you are so flawless!” Izzy gasp.
She has just entered in my room with Alec. I am in front of my mirror studying my reflection, i am wearing my wedding dress and I’d be lying if i said that i do not like it.
It would be the perfect wedding, just as i had always imagined it if it weren’t for the groom. In these past days i spend every moment with him because Maryse forbidden me every mission and forced me to stay with him before the wedding to make us know and he is beautiful i do not have nothing to say about this. He has curly brown hair, brown eyes and his jawline is so sculpted that makes your own jawline drop just watching him. But this as no effect on me.
“Thanks Izzy and you are stanning as always.” i give a small smile at her, she is wearing a long emerald green dress with a couple of his inseparable high heels.
“Are you alright?” asks Alec.
“Yes, i was just thinking.”
“Y/N, you are not forced to do it if you do not want, you can go back.” continue Alec.
“No, i want to do it. It is just…James is nice but i do not feel anything like what you should feel in these cases, you know? I should be happy and anxious and all those things but i feel anything.” i explain.
“Then call of the marriage. If you think that marrying James you will be able to forget Jace you are wrong. If you marry him you lose the chance to stay with Jace.” Izzy replies.
“Why everyone think i do this because of Jace? I told him that we can stay togheter and i already lost my chance. Now i need to be alone, sorry.” i excuse myself quickly running out of the room and head to the greenhouse, my favorite place in the entery Istitute. Every time i need a little time for me the greenhouse is always where i go. After a little time Jace always reached me with a cup of my favorite tea and biscuits, then we went in my room and watched my favorite cartoon. He kept me company for as long as i need, especially in the beginning, when i lost my parents. He has even planted tulips, my favorite flowers, only for me. He was always here for me, not just like a brother or a friend, i just see it now. He was falling for me just like i was falling for him. I am a fool.
“Y/N.” i turn around hearing my name and i saw Clary. “Can we talk please? I want to say something to you.”
“Go heated” i nod.
“I know is the day of your wedding and maybe is to late or maybe not but i want to talk about Jace. I do not know if you seen him in this week but is upset. He talked to me about what happened between you two and belive me if i say that is the wrong choice. Between me and Jace there are nothing. Ok, honestly i like him, he is a great guy but he do not want me. You have every right to hate me but if you do not come back you regret it.” she say firmly looking in my eyes.
“I do not hate you Clary, i never have. I hate the changes and the fact i am not able to heandle them. I lost every member of my family, i am the last Y/L/N, i change family and house…Then you come out and everything chaged: Jace has canged, my relationship with Jace, the true about Maryse and Robert and Valentine. I am about to marry and this change my wole life. And i care about Jace, a lot, but he is out of my launge, he is perfect in every way and i am not good for him. He can have every girl of the Shadow world or Mundane world if he want. He will be happy, so please stop, stay besaide Jace for me, you are good and i do not hate you, i ammire you.” i confess and she smile in the end.
“I am sorry, trust me i know how you feel, a month ago i belive i was…i do not know, normal? Now i am here and i am a sort of power girl that i belived existed only in the movies.” she laughs making me smile and then she retun serious. “This is not the right way for everything you are trying to do, now you can do something for your own, you can choice. He do not want me or any girl of the Shadow World or Mundane World, he want you, he loves you and you love him too.”
“Please stop.” i sigh tired. “I love him i really do, but i am easy to forgot and i can try to forget him too. And for the hundred time this is the right choice.” i add.
“Right choice for what? Are you trying to convince the other or you saying this?” she says tilting her head to on side looking at me.
“I’ve already decided. Forgive me now but i have to go, the marriage is about to start. I will see you there.” i say to her and run away for the second time. I just want peace, a little time with me and me before the wedding but it seems i have no time, the cerimony is about to start. When i reach the room where they organized the wedding i see Alec out of the door waiting for me and when i approach him he istantly hug me and for a while we remain for a while embracing each other.
“Ok, let’s do it.” he whisper and i nod. We turn towards the door just the moment it is open and i feel my breath stop. The room is full but i know only Clary already here, Simon and Magnus in the first row, Robert, Max and Maryse in the other and Izzy standing in front of the altar with James waiting for me. I do not see Jace, i look at Alec and he must have noticed because he looks at me with a sad look. I smile at him and shock my head.
“Let’s do it.” i agree, he reach my arm and in the moment we hear music we start to walk down the aisle. I could never thank Alec enough for doing this, my legs are weak and probably if he does’t hold me i could easly fall down. I hold thigter Alec’s arm and smile embarassed at the people. I am not exagerate if i say that doing this is the most embrassing things i ever do. We reach the altar and James took my hand and helps me up while Alec goes sit with the others.
“You are beautiful.” James smile at me and i to him. “Thanks, you too.”
It is time for James Blackwine and Y/N Y/L/N to mark each other with the wedding union rune. A rune on the hand, a rune on the heart. A union is born.
Here we are. The Silent Brother approaches us, i take my stele and grab James’s hand.
“Are you alrght? You are shaking.” James says warried and i just nod. I close my eyes and take a deep breath trying to calm my shaking. I open my eyes and i start to approach his hend with my stele.
“Y/N wait.” i heard a strong and weak voice who i recognize as Maryse. “Do not do this.” she add and i turn to look at her with my eyes out in shock.
“What are you saying?” James speaks for me.
“I am sorry James, but i can not do this to her. She is like a dauther to me and i can not ruin her life. Y/N i know in these past weeks i was rude with you and i am sorry, i was worried about the future of our family and i lost my mind. I know i am rigid sometimes but i love you, as my child and i am forced you to marry and i can not allow this.” her voice crack while every guest start whispering and murmur. I step back and i feel two hands on my wrist, Isabelle’s hands who is trying to keep me up.
“I only accepted for you, because i am convinced if i marry today maybe you finally saw me like your family. I was convinced that to you i am just a burden, a weak girl who do not belong here. I only do this for you! And now you are trying to stop me!” i burst out at her. Now also Alec and Magnus are on my side with worried face but i push everyone away from me. I can feel every part of my body shaking but for the rage now, i clench my fists pressing my nails on my palm. She trying to hold her tears back while she nervously taking a step towards me.
“I know, i was wrong. One day maybe you can forgive me and understand me. I can not force you to marry a guy you do not love. I’ve been watching you these days and what i’ve seen is a kind and strong girl who tried to prove herself but you are more than you think and i am trying to do something good for you.” she remark, guilty obvsious in her voice. I shock my head and wipe the tears that threaten to quit and for the first time i look around the room and i see shocked and confused people and even some are crying. I turn to look at Isabelle and Alec who are looking at me with a huge smiles on their faces but concern in their eyes. Witout a word i bolt out of the wedding to my room and lock the door. I lean against the door pressing my palm on the wood, i trying to fight my tears back biting my lips harde as i can but my troath hurt so much and my lungs are on fire, my brath are short and fast when sudently a pair of strong arms hug me from behind and i jump, but i immediatly recognize Jace’s perfume.
“Sssh…everithing it is okay.”
I remove my hands on the door and i grab disperatly Jace’s arms on my waist while i trying to calm myself. I rise my head in search of air making. I lean my back on Jace and he strengthens his grip on my body. Jace’s mouth found my neck and begin to kiss me slowly and sweetly, gently rocking us. After a few minutes i calm down and the room is completely silent, i can hear only our breaths. I lower my head when i can feel my lungs breath properly and my body relax. Jace’s grip loose my waist and slowly turn me towards him until we are face to face. His hand reach my wet cheeks removing the tears while the other are pressing on my lower back for keep close our bodys. I can not help myself but noticing how muscolar he is, i have seen his body thoutausand time but never this close. I let my hand sliding down his harms and up on his shoulders, i look down and i can see our bodies pressed togheter, my face burning at the closeness. I look at his soft skin, just a little red and his pinkie lips. When i look in his eyes once again his expression is intense and loving.
I feel my mouth get dry, i trying to say something but before i do it he close the gap between us and cover my mounth with his in a soft kiss and i immediatly kiss him back. His lips are so soft, more than i had imagined. He taste my lips with is touge and the soft peck turns in a passionate and hungry kiss. My hand found place behind his neck and his arms around my waist tigthened the grip pulling me into him. We broke the kiss feeling the urgency to catch a breath. He still keeps me close while our foreheads touching, our breaths are fast and we have big smiles on our faces.
“I am so sorry Jace.” i says breathless.
“You do not have anything to be sorry for. You did what you felt right to do but now i will never let you go and you better stop saying that you are not worth for me. You are enought to me, you are everything i need because i love you.” he confess never break eye contact with me.
“I love you too, i really do.” i says feeling my heart beating agaist my chest. With that he kiss me again and again and this is everything i need too. Suddently i broke the kiss and i push him away a little.
“Wait. What were you doing in my room?” i looking suspiciously at him and he smirk.
“I was waiting for you obviously. I know you would not marry that guy, i am something you’ll regret losing, love.” he says cocky and he throws me in the bed laughing then jump on top of me.
A/N: Well, this is the last part, it is kinda bad but i hope you’ll like it.