Of Friends and Lovers (Cont. 4)
Rafael watched Olivia
struggle with her words. She had a sharp tongue and a sharper mind and he
admired both. She was trying to tell him about Tucker and he knew she was going
to get defensive right away. He didn’t believe her words when she says it wasn’t
serious and that they hadn’t…done something. Slept together? He tried not to
snicker, letting her know he knew she was lying.
Before he could call her on it she went on saying that she didn’t want to be with him and that she wanted him instead. He couldn’t express how long he’d waited to hear her say that but it made him nervous to hear. Was she only saying that because she was scared of what was happening with Ed? No, Ed isn’t necessarily a very powerful man but he does hold some clout. His job is to investigate those who investigate which means that he is privileged to information that others aren’t. Barba can bring up charges against a suspected rapist but Tucker can bring up charges against him; not that there was necessarily anything he needed to confess to, but the thought was unsettling nonetheless.
She wanted to call him during the hostage situation. Sure, sure she did. If she wanted to, wouldn’t she have done it? When he realized something was wrong he called her repeatedly but then he didn’t hear from her after that.
As she talked, his brain worked backwards as his finger circled the dew that had gathered on his glass. She was dating someone but it wasn’t serious. She was saying that she wasn’t sleeping with him. She wants to be with him but her face shows repulsion when she talks about him. She called him for comfort when she was in a horrifying, traumatic situation when he wasn’t the one who was there for her when she was held hostage before. She was asking, begging, for him not to push her away and yet that had been what she was doing for the past couple months with Ed. And in a moment of realization, every victim interview, every assault report, every survivor testimony came together in his mind and the blood drained from his face. He’d always suspected it but never dared bring it to her attention for fear that it would break her down even farther. But he had to know now. If they were ever going to move forward, if he was ever going to be what she needed him to be, he would need to know.
“Olivia, I went through the Lewis trial with you from day one. I made sure that I did everything in my power to keep you safe and yes, if I could go back in time and do things over I would. I took your word at face value every time I prepped you or took a statement. I never questioned your rendition of the events and I never prodded you to tell more than you needed to. If you don’t want me to push you away, you need to do the same for me.” He waited for a moment to make sure that she had taken in the first part of his question. “Lewis raped you, didn’t he.”