benny rogers

Rent quizzes are all like

what is your favorite past time??

  • filming stuff

  • stripping

  • playing musetta’s waltz on your guitar

  • being a lawyer and helping people get hired by buzzline

  • wearing leather pants, flirting with people, and mooing

  • dressing up in christmas drag
  • getting mugged in an alley way and being taken in by a drag queen
  • collecting rent from poor people who used to be your friends
Writing Side Blog

All of my writing has been transferred over to my side blog!

I’ll be spending tomorrow filling out a request and working on part 2 of the Bucky Barnes series that’s posted here (i recommend checking it out, it’s kind of movie AU-ish but also Avengers).

REQUESTS ARE OPEN on the blog!

Writing Blog

Writing Blog

Writing Blog

You're A Fool
Jonathan Larson
You're A Fool


You’re off?

You wanna wait here for Benny?

Is there anything else to do?

Well, there’s Maureen’s show…

You wanna go, yes?

I guess…

For someone cool, you’re a fool.

I know.

But her show’s not till one.

We’ll catch the 10 o'clock meeting!

Oh, fun.
I don’t know why you go. You’re straight – and negative!

We’re not positive that I’m negative!

But I thought that you were tested!

Yes, well, I haven’t seen the results…

From last July?

I forgot, that’s all. It was a busy fall!


I can’t!

Yeah right! Then when?

I lost the number!

You didn’t go.


For someone cool, you’re a fool.

Let’s make a deal!

No deals!

I’ll get tested if you sit in tonight!

I don’t fit in, alright!?
Can’t you see I’m working?
It’s scratchy.

It recalls something, but it’s catchy.

The inspired zone of my brain has atrophied,
but I need to leave a mark, before I croak!

Not funny!

No joke!
I wish that I could turn the days I wasted
toying with dope fiends and groupies
into days spent obsessing over details
the way that you do.

If you only knew
I spend so much time obsessing, it’s depressing
For someone cool, you’re the fool
You want to rediscover the spark
leave a mark, share something with someone
Face your fears

What’s that I hear?
Blood test, did you say?


For someone cool, you’re a…

Lucy with George Burns

S5;E1 ~ September 12, 1966


When George Burns opens an account at the bank, he recruits Lucy to be his new sidekick.  When the act is a hit, Lucy must choose to go on tour with Burns or stay with Mr. Mooney.

Regular Cast

Lucille Ball (Lucy Carmichael / Rusty Martin), Gale Gordon (Theodore J. Mooney)

Mary Jane Croft (Mary Jane Lewis) does not appear in this episode.

Guest Cast

George Burns (Himself) was born Nathan Birnbaum in New York City in January 1896.  He married Gracie Allen in 1926 and the two formed an act (Burns and Allen) that toured in vaudeville.  They had their own hit show “The George Burns and Gracie Allen Show” first on radio then on CBS TV from 1950 to 1958, airing concurrently with “I Love Lucy.” Burns and Desilu shared such talent as Bea Benadaret, Elvia Allman, Ross Elliot, Maurice Marsac, Kathryn Card, Eleanor Audley, Sheldon Leonard, Charles Lane, Irving Bacon, Hy Averback, Jay Novello, Shirley Mitchell, Jerry Hausner, Roy Rowan, Benny Rubin, Tristram Coffin, Mary Wickes, and many others.  After Allen’s death in 1964 (two years before this “Lucy Show” episode), Burns reinvented himself as a solo act. In 1976 he won an Oscar for playing one of The Sunshine Boys. He was also known for playing the title role in Oh, God! (1978) and its 1984 sequel Oh, God! You Devil. Burns and Ball appeared on many TV variety and award shows together. He died at the age of 100.  

Jack Benny (Himself, Telephone Voice) was born on Valentine’s Day 1894. He had a successful vaudeville career, and an even greater career on radio with “The Jack Benny Program,” which also became a successful television show. George Burns made a dozen appearances on the show between 1952 and 1964. He was also the best man at Burns’ wedding to Gracie Allen in 1926. Benny was a Beverly Hills neighbor of Lucille Ball’s and the two were off-screen friends. He previously appeared on “The Lucy Show” as Harry Tuttle (Jack Benny’s doppelganger) in “Lucy and the Plumber” (S3;E2).  He later appeared on three episodes of “Here’s Lucy” (one opposite George Burns) and appeared with Ball and Burns on many TV variety and award shows. Benny died in 1974.

Jack Benny is not listed in the final credits. George Burns says that Benny is his agent.  

Sid Gould (Show Announcer Voice) made more than 45 appearances on “The Lucy Show,” all as background characters. He also did 40 episodes of “Here’s Lucy.” Gould (born Sydney Greenfader) was Lucille Ball’s cousin by marriage to Gary Morton.

Joan Carey (Telephone Operator Voice) has only six other screen credits to her name according to IMDB.  

This is the first episode of season 5, the shortest half-hour season of any Lucille Ball series (except for the ill-fated “Life With Lucy”), producing only 22 instead of the usual 26 episodes. This reduced total was due to a special Ball did for CBS on location entitled “Lucy In London,”  technically not part of the series and not syndicated.

The title of this episode is often listed as “Lucy and George Burns.” The episode was filmed in mid-June 1966, before the cast and crew went on summer hiatus.  

The date this episode premiered (September 12, 1966) CBS presented the series premiere of “Family Affair” (1966-71) starring Brian Keith and Sebastian Cabot. The opening episode featured Phil Ober (Vivian Vance’s ex-husband) and “Lucy Show” extras Barbara Perry and Murray Pollack.  “Family Affair” was produced by Edmund Beloin, who had written a half dozen season 4 episodes of “The Lucy Show.” Once again, “The Andy Griffith Show” (filmed at Desilu Studios) followed Lucy in the CBS prime time lineup. That same morning, CBS syndication ran a repeat of “Lucy Wants to Move to the Country” (ILL S6;E15)

A new opening title sequence was created that featured Lucy as an animated jack-in-the-box. Lucille Ball reportedly hated it, and it was only used in a handful of episodes at the start of the season before being replaced by a slightly revamped version of the kaleidoscope opening. However, because of poor editing, the theme music to this opening was retained for several early fall 1966 episodes while the kaleidoscope opening was used. The jack-in-the-box opening hasn’t been shown in syndication since the 1970s but was recently restored for the DVD release.

This episode is in the public domain resulting in the availability of many inexpensive and low quality DVDs.  There are 30 episodes of the entire series that have somehow reverted to public domain.  Only one season 5 episode - “Lucy Puts Main Street on the Map” (S5;E18) - is still under copyright protection.  

In Mr. Mooney’s office, Burns sings (a capella) a bit of Irving Berlin’s “Lazy.” The song was written in 1924 and sung by Bing Crosby in the film Holiday Inn (1942) and Marilyn Monroe in There’s No Business Like Show Business (1954).  Burns then launches into a chorus of “Time on my Hands,” a song written by Vincent Youmans, Harold Adamson, and Mack Gordon in 1930 for the musical Smiles. The song was used in the Marilyn Miller biopic Look for the Silver Lining (1949) and in So This Is Love (1953) sung by Kathryn Grayson.

Looking for George Burns’ file in Lucy’s absence, Mr. Mooney opens the ‘B’ drawer to find “Martin, Miller, Munson, Murphy” - but no Burns. This is the start of a running gag about Lucy’s unusual filing system that will continue well into “Here’s Lucy.”  Lucy explains that the B’s are under the X’s because “that poor little file never has anything in it.”  Her mnemonic system of filing: 

Burns reminds her of fire and fire reminds her of stove and stove reminds her of pot roast and pot roast reminds her of noodles and noodles reminds her of her mother (who made the best noodles) – therefore the Burns file is located under 'G’ - for gravy!  

Mr. Mooney offers Burns a cigar. George Burns was rarely seen without a cigar in his hand.  He claimed to smoke up to ten cigars a day up until his death at age 100.  

Mr. Mooney asks why Burns stopped working and went into retirement. He replies that he like to work with women but that Carol Channing went into Hello, Dolly!, Dorothy Provine went into television [“The Alaskans” 1959-60], and Connie Stevens went into pictures. Burns actually performed with all three of these women at some point.  What goes unmentioned is the death of Gracie Allen. Perhaps Lucy and the writers felt that the public already knew this information and would accept it as a given. On “The Lucy Show” death is only ever mentioned in a humorous context. The word was never mentioned to explain the absence of Lucy’s husband; just that she was a widow.  Lucy’s deceased husband never even had a first name!  

Lucille Ball’s entrance comes four minutes into the action, cued by George Burns saying he’s looking for “a girl with a pixie personality, an eccentric, a real kook.”  [Enter Lucy]  Curiously, Lucy does not get entrance applause - probably due to the fact that she was typically introduced to the studio audience by Gary Morton, her husband and warm-up act.  Interestingly, when Lucy recognizes George Burns and says his name aloud – despite the fact that he’s been on screen for four minutes – the studio audience applauds.  Lucy and Burns both get entrance applause in the final dressing room scene indicating that this scene (despite being the last in the script) was filmed first for logistical reasons involving the sets.  

Lucy says that Ginger Rogers is her very favorite star. She describes a film she saw on “The Late Late Show” in which Fred Astaire and Ginger Rogers fell in love despite her accidentally kicking him from the chorus line. Lucy is probably describing Follow the Fleet (1936) or Roberta (1935) in which Lucille Ball had supporting roles. Both films were made by RKO, which became Desilu Studios.  

Jack Benny has booked Lucy and George into a club in Santa Monica.  Their act is very much in the style of Burns and Allen, where Lucy delivers the set-up and George anticipates her punchlines. Lucy and Burns sing “Some of These Days” and dance a soft shoe. “Some of These Days” was written in 1910 by Shelton Brooks.  It became associated with Sophie Tucker, who Lucy impersonated in a 1970 Bob Hope TV special.  

The Las Vegas bookers offer $10,000 for the act ($15,000 if Burns won’t sing). Lucy turns down the offer in order to stay with Mr. Mooney at the bank. [This is after all, the beginning of a new season, not the end!]


In “Lucy and the Dummy” (ILL S5;E3) Lucy Ricardo’s comedic dancing routine with 'Raggedy Ricky’ earns her a lucrative contract, but she is conflicted if she should leave her husband and child for the bright lights of Hollywood. In the end she turns the offer down, just as Lucy Carmichael does here.  

Blooper Alerts

Mr. Mooney’s office has been reconfigured once again. There is a new door (marked “Private”) just behind Mr. Mooney’s desk and there is a new bank of green filing cabinets behind Lucy’s desk.  

“Lucy with George Burns” rates 3 Paper Hearts out of 5