I don’t know what to label us, it keeps on shifting between “could’ve been” and “we never happened” and “WHY DON’T YOU LOOK AT ME THE WAY YOU USED TO ANYMORE”. Most of our conversation are cut short because I know this won’t go the way I wanted, I know you won’t say the words I wanted to hear. Say, maybe I’m a fool for making you left me. Say, maybe I just wanted you to try.
I heard you’re not supposed to move on just because he has but damn what am I supposed to do when he look that happy with her. I know she won’t fuck this up. So maybe it’s not that I don’t know what to label us, maybe I don’t want to label us at all, maybe I just want to shove this to the dustbin, maybe I just can’t take it that he has moved on, maybe I still do love him. But let’s stop with this maybes, all I know is I should stop dramatizing the way he left me. My first question to him was probably “Was it painful to love me?” I should stop wondering when will he came back. He won’t.
owlandowly // I took a glance on the hourglass and see the top part empty.
They decide to split a bacon grilled cheese sandwich and a giant strawberry smoothie because Jonghyun isn’t that hungry and Jinki just…wants to see Jonghyun happy. The movie doesn’t start for another hour, and since it’s warm, they decide to walk around, talking about everything and nothing at all. The silences are comfortable when they come, and Jonghyun can’t help his flustered grin when Jinki tells him how cute he looks.
(There is a point where Jonghyun thinks Jinki is going to kiss him though - they’re by the pond near Jonghyun’s house and Jonghyun is telling Jinki about the time when he and Taemin went to feed the ducks and Taemin nearly fell in the pond, and when he turns to Jinki, his laughter immediately dies because of the look on Jinki’s face, concentration and sheer adoration and-
Jinki doesn’t kiss him, because the alarm they’d set to leave for the movie goes off, and Jonghyun doesn’t know if he’s more disappointed, or Jinki is.)
Seeing thin and/or healthy weight people eat anything is an out of body experince like how??? Do??? u??? Do that??? Without ???? Looking???? Fat like me?????
Like can u belive that some people are actually able to consume a healthy ammount of food and maintain a healthy/low weight without restricting or counting calories or purging like wtf
(( Okay guys, I didn’t say anything since now but it is kinda really submerging my dashboard.
GUYS. DON’T TALK ABOUT SUICIDE SO EASILY. PLEASE DON’T.
I don’t know if some of you just want to have some attention from people ivl and in reality you don’t attend to do it at all. Tbh, it doesn’t matter. I know that life can be hard sometimes, but the suicide isn’t the SOLUTION.
Hey, you only has ONE LIFE.
It is okay to be weak, it is okay to cry, it is okay to want people to care about you time to time. It is okay.
But you need to be STRONG too.
Because if you look carefully around you, you will realize that there is a beautiful world out there, not perfect but pretty in its own way.
You will realize that there are people who really CARES about you out there. Some people love you deeply but don’t show it quite often.
You will realize that if you do it, you won’t be able to come back ever again.
You know what will happen after you do it?
Someone who treasures you will find you corpse, they will call the ambulance while crying, as you will be carried to the hospital, they will pray for your safety, believing that there is still a chance that you will be still alive. But no, the path of the life ends here for you. Your death won’t resolve anything, it’ll make people who care about you cry and sadness will overwhelm them. They will live along with this burden in their heart. Always thinking
“I could save them. If only I could… They will still be there today…”
You know what is there after death? Your dreams, your future, EVERYTHING will end if you die. Only darkness will stay.
It is okay to rely on other people, it is okay to ask for help.
No one is going to blame you. Just do it. Don’t wait someone to reach out their hand for you, sometimes you need to do the first step.