being a doof

My mom’s cat, Jagger (his name is actually Mic Jagger-Gibson but we call him Jagger, Jag, or Jaguar respectively), being a doof. He’s a needy a-hole that eats too much too fast before throwing it all back up, but we love him

anonymous asked:

(Before zimbits becomes canon) Okay so imagine Bitty and Shitty having a talk in the kitchen about women-taking last names after marriage. Then Jack being the doof he is walks in and is casually like 'haha what about zimmerman' and bitty is internally like 'oh heck yea i take that name' and jack is internally 'why the heck did i say that'

Bitty and Shitty were sitting in the kitchen taste testing Bitty’s latest creation and talking last names.

“I get it, Bitty. I totally get it. Just because you’re getting married doesn’t mean you have to take some person’s name. But some people like tradition and the whole becoming a family thing.”

Bitty laughed, enjoying watching Shitty pretty much have the entire conversation with himself. It was always entertaining to watch Shitty discuss whatever was on his mind from every angle.

“Fuck, Bitty, this pie is good. What about you? If you were with some guy and you guys got married, would you want to take his name? Or what if he wanted to take your name? What would you do?”

Finding his pie suddenly very interesting, Bitty pushed it around the plate, trying to find an answer. “Um….I think it would depend on who I was marrying. I kinda like my last name. What about you? Would you ask you wife to take your name?”

Shitty smiled and leaned back in his chair. “Are you serious? Me? She can have it if she wants it, Knight is an awesome last name. But I wouldn’t mind taking her’s either.”

“Knight is a pretty awesome last name. I’d take it if we got married.” Bitty teased. “Might make it a hyphenate, though.”

“Knight-Bittle? Nah, Bittle-Knight is better.”

“I like Knight-Bittle. Using, Bittle, first sounds like a teeny knight.”

Shitty laughed and was stealing another piece of pie when they heard Jack’s voice at the door. “What about Zimmermann?”

Bitty was silent as Jack looked him in the eye and Shitty pushed a chair out for him. “There’s a lot of legacy to that name. I think I could live up to it.”

Jack took a seat and Bitty handed him a slice of pie, trying not to make eye contact. He hoped if he just nodded along and let Jack and Shitty banter, Jack wouldn’t ask him what he thought. He’d had a crush on Jack for so long now, he wasn’t sure what would come out of his mouth if Jack asked.

Jack took a bite of pie and stared down at the table, cheeks red. “ flavor is this? It’s, it’s good.”

Relieved to have a new subject, Bitty babbled about how he was trying something new and how glad he was that Jack and Shitty had liked it. Soon after that, they all moved onto a new subject and Bitty could breathe a sigh of relief.

If he was truly honest, he’d jump at the chance to take the Zimmermann name. Shitty was right, it had a legacy, but it was a good one. Even if they hyphenated it, it still sounded good and Bitty would by lying if he said he’d never imagined it.

Bitty stood to start cleaning up and Shitty disappeared muttering something about helping Lardo. Jack carried the plates over to the sink. As Bitty washed, Jack dried and nudged Bitty with an elbow. “Everything alright, Bittle?”

“Of course! Just thinking about what I need to study next. Got distracted with the pie and am probably a little behind.”

Taking the dish from Bitty’s hands, Jack pointed to the door. “Go. I’ll finish here.”

“Are you sure?”

“Go, BIttle. Can’t have you getting behind.”

“Thanks, Jack.”

“You’re welcome, Bittle.”

ya know, sometimes when i wanna laugh i think about stan and ford in phineas and ferb like scenarios

more specifically i think of ford accidentally causing stan harm and being the most oblivious doof about it

and to be even more specific i always think of two very particular scenes from the haunted house ep and the chronicles of meap

(if this reaches you) Dear Mark,

I just watched your newest video and something bothered me.

If something makes you emotional it really is okay to cry, don’t apologize or say you’re “being a doof”

you’ve been through some serious shit, to look back on accomplishments and see someone portrayed as your father in an already reminiscent game is hard and we get that.

Again, please don’t ever feel the need to apologize for having emotions. Don’t ever feel ashamed of crying. And don’t feel like a doof for expressing your emotions.

Welcome friends to my special brand of shitposting.

Basically this started as a crack idea of giving Yui wings and devolved rapidly into a 10-page Googledoc that will never see the light of day. EVER.


There are probably more, but those are the biggest ones. Thanks for the ask! -Heinz


You mind if I continue invading Germany?

Meet Dee and Mack, the Unstoppables.

This is going to be a recurring convo between the two. Usually, Dee spits an insult and Mack, being the philosophical doof he is, spits some wisdom… or takes it as a compliment. These two argue a lot but make no mistake. They can’t live without each other.


Had so much fun designing Mack. I had to be really careful with his choice of clothing ‘cuz he represents people in my life I look up to. In the end, he turned out pretty good!

They’re the main characters of the game (though Dee is the only playable one) and their friendship is going to have a really big impact with the plot (WHICH I FINALIZED LAST NIGHT!!! YIS!!)

I have no idea what their relationship is. It’s gonna be established in the story that they’re best friends but that’s it. They have more of an older brother/little sister dynamic but if people ship ‘em, I honestly don’t mind.

Oh, and before anybody rants about their palettes leaning to their gender roles, Dee’s favorite color is indigo. Mack loves magenta. Now shh! 

(I’ve had this one on my box for months. I’ve always wanted to do some comics with Sam and my farmer actually acting fully like herself, and drawing out the little scenarios that have happened in the game. Maybe one day I’ll start doing those like how magicallyclueless does with her farmer Jade and Sebastian. But for now, here’s Sam being a doof and Farmer Jess not handling it too terribly well. ;) )

Comic panels: 11

Keep reading

most of doof’s psyche was full of his worst fears though

and then the little perry-shaped grave shows up


like there’s always been the sad headcanons about doof being aware that perry’s lifespan will probably be shorter that his, but that one little background detail that i never noticed before makes me positive that it’s. it’s probably true?? it’s true and most likely weighs pretty heavily on his mind if it was important/scary enough to show up in that scene

doof is terrified of perry’s mortality, b y e