before the cake

emmi-cakes  asked:

Heyyy!! So this isn't really a question but I just wanted to say that I love your art so much!!!! Your comics inspire me to draw my own (though I haven't tried yet) and your art in general gives me so much joy ^~^ Love you and your art!!

Ohh gosh! Thank you so much. Hearing stuff like this inspires me to draw in exchange, to be honest.

And you are thinking of drawing comics? I could give you a few tips. I mean, I am in no means a professional but I’ve drawn a bunch of comics and learned stuff about them over the years. This is just stuff that I often think about while sketching out a page.

-Never crop limbs from the joints, like elbow or wrist, or the head from the neck. I think that this is more on the photography side but it applies to this too. 
-Vary the zoom ins and zoom outs. For example, having a comic with just everyone on every panel cropped from the middle gets boring very easily. Zoom out to show the full body and the environment for a change. Did something dramatic/important happen? Zoom in drastically to show a reaction or the important thing.
-The flow of the panels is a tricky thing, but it’s a thing. Think about where the reader’s eye moves when they see the page. Do you want them to see the speech bubble first or the character? Many things can lead the viewers eye. Like body gestures and speech bubbles. This is tricky and difficult to point out without example pictures.
-Introduce the environment on the first panels with big zoom outs. Not entirely necessary but the purpose of it is to give the viewer an idea of where the scene is taking place. 

Uh, I hope this helps on some front? I cut my explanations down a bit because I do not want to make this long and I’m not great at explaining. Thank you again!

instagram

Happy Pride Month!
Asexual/Demisexual Pride colored cake 💜🏳🐘🎩
Source: https://instagram.com/p/BTdygNXg2w_/

4

Nico was in border patrol, but it was just so he could  be surprised.

Can you believe this could be the first time Nico can celebrate his birthday with people that like him since his mother died? :))

aceofalmonds  asked:

Hello! I read (and enjoyed!) the story you posted of your grandpa and his tree disposal methods, and so was looking for the story you mentioned of your other grandpa menacing a peach tree with a baseball bat, but can't seem to find it. Halp?

That would be because I haven’t posted it yet!  Many people have requested the story mentioned in the tags “Grandpa Menaces a Peach Tree With A Baseball Bat”, So here it is, with a side of “Grandpa Menaces The Iowa Relatives With Giant Corn”

**

For the Full Context of this tale, you have to understand how my dad’s side of the family got to America in the first place.  Prior to 1917, they were all farmers of limited success that migrated from county to county, trying not to starve, until a covey of the Fitzpatricks heard that they could be shoveling shit in Grand Americay, far away from the people they owed money to, so they all fucked off to Iowa and somehow made a fortune in the real-estate business in the middle of the depression.  Despite now being comfortably middle-class, they never actually gave up farming, and having a pair of glowing green thumbs was a point of pride in the family.

So, when Grandpa moved out to California, specifically to the Salinas Valley, which is where an absurd percentage of the country’s food is grown because it’s full of probably the world’s most stupidly good soil,  Grandpa had to continue the tradition and set up a garden in the backyard, planted various crops and flowers in January because fuck you this is coastal California, I can start stuff in the middle of winter, and invited his sister Leone and her growing brood of (at the time, 5, later 9 children) out to visit.

They came out in July, to escape the Midwest humidity and Butter fetish for a time, when the corn is typically getting to be around knee-height if things are going well.  Grandpa spent a long time asking how things were back on the farm, plying them with ice tea and grandma’s lethal Angel Food cake, before politely inviting Leone and her Husband Scotty out back to see how his patch was doing, oh its not much really, just a bit of fun for me and the children-

Scotty and Leone stared at the nine-foot-tall goddamn corn which was already setting fruit because it had been going since January.  At the watermelon plant that had taken over the side-yard, and at the other oversize and thriving crops that had taken over grandpa’s yard.  There was a few moments of awed silence.

“Well fuck you Edwin.” Scotty eventually said, before Leone whopped him over the head and the rest of the visit was a pleasant diversion.

the following spring though, Grandpa received a package from Iowa, specifically a small peach tree with a note saying “With Love, Scotty.”

Leone knew better than to engage in such shenanigans, because this is irish-agrarian passive-aggressive Bullshittery at its absolute finest.  “Sure, yeah, you can do corn.  Any asshole can do corn.  TRY THIS FUSSY-ASS PEACH VARIETAL INSTEAD, YOU ASS”  is perhaps a more accurate translation.

Grandpa, not about to be intimidated by a mere tree, planted that sucker in the front yard and proceeded to pamper it- bone meal fertilizer, a brand-new irrigation system, the works.  Hell, he would go out some times and talk to the darn thing.  It flowered, and he borrowed a behive from one of the local farmers to make DARN SURE that it got pollinated, because he was going to mail peaches to Scotty for Christmas, that asshole.

The tree. Did not. fruit.

That fall, grandpa reccived a letter from Scotty, asking after a couple paragraphs of circumlocutions, how that tree he sent was doing?

Grandpa got up, made himself a martini, picked up Dad’s baseball bat, and walked out to the front yard to have a discussion with the Peach tree.  

“I’ve just received a letter.”  he explained, waving the paper at the tree. “Asking when you’re going to fruit.  Now, I think I’ve held up my responsibilities to you as your caretaker, so it’s time for you to start providing.  Do you understand?  This spring, you better start fruiting or I will personally take this bat to you and turn you to into kindling.”

He stepped close to the tree, sticking his face in the branches as though whispering into it’s hypothetical ear. “Do not test me, you little shit.”

The next week, the tree bloomed out of season, and by February, it had set an obscene amount of fruit, which grandpa gleefully turned into preserves and mailed back to Iowa.

  • L: *eating, as usual*
  • Matsuda: But Ryuzaki!!! hOW are you going to eVeR catch Kira?!?!
  • Light: *tries not to look like he's eavesdropping*
  • L: Catching Kira will be a...
  • L: *dramatically pausing*
  • L: Piece of cake.
  • Light: *deeply inhales*
  • Light: That's it Ryuk, I don't give a fUCK anymore, give me the shinigami eyes he's dying rIGHT NOW.

Official Graveyard Shift Lyrics

Rats
Well Mrs. Pharmacist / I insist / fix me up with something quick
I’ve been a bad little boy and I think i’m getting sick
Sick to the bone / slave to the flesh
Better put on my Sunday’s best      
I’ve been bad little boy… little boy

I’ve got a dirty dirty dirty dirty dirty little secret
And I’m not not not sure that I wanna keep it
So we feed ourselves lies to submit to the shadows
Cause we just wanna dance under our pretty perfect halos

Everyone’s got a secret
Whats yours? whats yours?
Don’t be shy, i’ll never repeat it  

Oh Mrs. Pharmacist / if I resist / lock me up and bind my wrists
You’ve been a bad little girl…. little girl.    
Close your eyes and listen close
I know just how much you love it
If you speak you lose your turn
So shut your mouth before I fuck it

Everyone’s got a secret
Tell me all about yours

Love. Hate.
Oh how we play the game
Cold soul
No sense of self control
Love. Hate.
Unsure to pass or play
Cold soul / now  we’re out of control

Roses are red, and my heart is black
We creep about the floor to indulge like Rats
Enraptured, we walk to nurse our obsession
Cause the roles that we play are paved with cruel intentions

Well  Mrs. Pharmacist… If you insist

I’ve got a dirty dirty dirty dirty dirty little secret
And I’m not not not sure that I wanna keep it
So we feed ourselves lies to submit to the shadows
And I just wanna shake you by your little perfect fucking halo

Everyone’s got a secret
Whats yours? whats yours?
Don’t be shy, i’ll never repeat it.


Queen For Queen
If you wanna soar with vultures, you’ll have to swallow bone
The saint charade is over / plastic royalty exposed
You wanna play the victim, to preach upon your throne                                  
No semblance of virtue as your relevance erodes

We go queen for queen  and move just like this

When you fall down
Will you back out
As you crawl through life with no crown?
Though you preach love, you package lies
Just a pawn in a kings disguise

I never said I’m perfect, there’s a guilt behind these eyes
So check me If it helps you fall asleep at night

Your skeletons are building / your closet’s getting tight
Are you the prey or spider in the web of all your lies?

When you fall down
Will you back out
As you crawl through life with no crown?
Though you preach love, you package lies
Just a pawn in a kings disguise

Don’t stop breathing in the chemicals
You don’t know humble… though you play the role
Pockets of evergreen are your amphetamine
Please stop feeding what you can’t control

YOU’LL FALL.
You’ll bend, you’ll break, (you’ll) trip over your “fame”
Be careful, or you’ll run your mouth off your face


Necessary Evil (Feat. Jonathan Davis)
Strip off the weight of morality, and check it at the door
I’ll show you the worst in me
…what i’ve become
 
Blow out the candles I need not a wish
For I am everything
Now crawl to my boots and lick
Kneel before me

Imma have my cake and fucking eat you too.

It’s my party and i’ll die when I want to, die when I want to, die when I want to
The monster you’ve made is wearing the crown
I’ll be the king and you be clown
I’ll take the blame (and) parade it around.
You’ve made me the villain you can’t live without.

Reciting violence like poetry
No you can’t sit with us
Too fashionably plain  
Now say my name
Forget everything you think you knew of who I used to be
I look much better as… as the enemy

Imma have my fucking cake and eat yours too.

I want you low
I won’t let you die
(I’ll) keep you alive
Just to remind you of what you are not

It’s my party and i’ll die when I want to
you wanna see me fail, but I won’t die for you.


Soft
You’re mine motherfucker

Let me begin with envy’s a sin
You’ll have to find new words to invent
Cause I’ve heard your broken record, and i’m not impressed

I love when you talk, I just use it to drive me
I won’t let your judgement define me
I’m not broken, so don’t fix me
I want you to hate me

Tell me what you’ve lost
Hang me on your cross
If you’re so wise, then why are you so Soft?
Do you leave your “throne” as you cast your stones?              
I’m above living under your microscope

I’m insane, I’m “insane in the membrane”
I wanna fuck your face with a switchblade
I’m not broken, so don’t fix me
I’ll leave you behind me

Internet killed the video star

Cry baby cry baby, did I just hear you whimper?
Cry baby cry…
Suck my middle fucking finger

Cry baby / Cry baby
What have you done lately?
Cry baby / Cry baby  
What have you done?

Tell me what you’ve lost.
Demonize my flaws
Do they call you when dumb needs a mascot?
Do you leave your “throne” as you cast your stones?              
I’m above living under your microscope

You dilate / god of your existence
Begging me to listen while you “pray”
Swallow in vain / sliver spoon religion
Closer from a distance

You’re mine motherfucker


Untouchable
They try to bend / they try to break me by design
But I am the nightmare that will haunt you in the light

If it’s war that you want… then I’m ready to play
And the world’s gonna know my name

Through everywhere that I go
Every failure I’ve owned
Every crack in my bones
I’m Untouchable
Like a sleeping grenade
Built to blow you away
Pull the pin… I explode
I’m Untouchable.

Born of the ground I dug myself out from the dirt
With every scar I will avow to shake the earth

Unless it’s blood that you want.. then get the fuck out my way
Cause the world’s gonna scream my name

I will never be silenced
I will eclipse the pain

You can’t let it go      
(It’s) the price that we pay
But I own the grave from which I came
You reap what you sow
We don’t bleed the same  
Cause I own the rights to my own fate
And i’ll sleep a king on my deathbed

Through everywhere that I go
Every failure i’ve owned
Every crack in my bones
I’m Untouchable
Like a sleeping grenade
Built to blow you away
Pull the pin… I Explode
I’m Untouchable.

Every mile from home
Every failure I’ve owned
Every crack in my bones
I’m Untouchable
Like a sleeping grenade
Built to blow you away
Pull the pin… I Explode
I’m Untouchable.


Not My Type: Dead As Fuck 2
She’s got no soul / heart black as coal
She’s from Hollywood Forever / dug her out of a hole
And here we go again / spinnin me in her web
She said “there’s just no rest for the queen of the dead”

Another trick to treat with candy apple dreams
Gonna rot her teeth cause i’m so sweet
One lick to rule them all
They crumble as they crawl

She loves me cause I like to give head like a zombie
(I) eat eat eat till her insides are on me
She loves me cause I give head like a zombie
(I) eat eat eat and nobody’s gonna stop me
And in the glow of the pale moonlight
She goes for a spin on my haunted hayride
Tried out the living but I don’t believe the hype  
Cause if she’s got a pulse, then she’s not my type.

She’s got a temper in stock / made of hemlock
Uses absinthe as a lip gloss
Death hawk / fresh New Rock’s                              
She’ll use your corpse as a catwalk

She’ll use your corpse as a catwalk
Plays truth or dare in the mirror
Uses absinthe as a lip gloss
Undead, but won’t shed a tear

She’s my graveyard baby
She’s my……

She loves me cause I like to give head like a zombie
(I) eat eat eat till her insides are on me
She loves me cause I give head like a zombie
(I) eat eat eat and nobody’s gonna stop me
And in the glow of the pale moonlight
She goes for a spin on my haunted hayride
Tried out the living but I don’t believe the hype  
Cause if she’s got a pulse, then she’s not my type.

D- E - A - D  
If she’s got a pulse, then she’s not my type.


The Ladder
Tragedy / a poisonous lover
You infiltrate to destroy
Vanity / a cancer unforgiving
A charlatan with poise  

Fool me once / enough is enough
Was I more than a step on your way up?
Hollowed out /  I’ve no semblance of love
Now you’re just somebody that I used to fuck.

Lest we learn / the tables turn / so i’m betting out / I’m betting out.
You can be the prey in your masquerade, but i’m getting out / i’m getting out
There’s nothing left to repair

Ravenous / self righteous and lurid
But how much more till you break?
Scavenger / so fucking undeserving
You slither in just to take what you can take

Counterfeit / I’m calling your bluff
Was I more than just a step on your way up?
Now you’ll burn and you’re flesh out of luck
Now you’re just somebody that I used to fuck

Lest we learn / the tables turn / so i’m betting out / I’m betting out.
You can be the prey in your masquerade, but i’m getting out / i’m getting out
Against insight I fed your source of revenue
But now, it means nothing to me to mean anything to you

Open grave /  I was too blind to see
That “love”, spelled to you, is “F A M E”

You fuck your way up the ladder
Going down on your way to the top
Do your arms ever tire?
Or do they heal while you climb with your mouth?  

Delete Everything
Sever the yearning / you can keep the fucking ring
Delete Everything
You can keep the fucking ring

Nothing left to repair.


Voices
Voices in my head again
Trapped in a war inside my own skin
They’re pulling me under.

I’ve swallowed myself but the fever remains
I’m numb to the pleasure but still feel the pain      
If I showed you my soul, would you cover your eyes?
If I told you the truth, would you dare me to lie?  

I keep it all inside because I know that man is every thing but kind

Voices in my head again
Beating me in a war I can’t win  
I can hear them now
Trapped in a game inside my own skin
And I don’t know myself anymore
They’re pulling me under
Voices

As I walk through this valley of shadows and death
I curse not the “wicked”, I praise not the “blessed”
If I told you the truth, you’d beg me to change
If fear were a currency, you’d own the bank

I don’t want to live so calloused and frozen / ugly and hopeless
I don’t want to live forever, I just want to live right now
You can’t take me from me

I keep it all inside because I know that man is everything but kind


LOUD (Fuck It)
You gotta be loud / You gotta be rude / so the world can hear you
You gotta be crass / You gotta be cold / it’s everything we know
Turn it up turn it up now

Another day, a double shot of hate
Drink it up like gasoline
Underpaid, you graduate, to build somebody else’s dream

With a noose as a tie… do you fantasize of a much different life?  
The fix for who they want you to be / directly streamed to your TV

And when they turn their backs on you…

You gotta be loud / You gotta be rude / so the world can hear you
You gotta be crass / You gotta be cold / it’s everything we know
Turn it up turn it up now
Loud / Rude / When nobody hears you
You gotta stand up / You gotta commit
Say “Fuck It”, make the best of it

A broken home you’re trying to mend
You’ve got one day left to pay the rent
We’re not sure, but we believe in the lie… that it’ll all be fine, when we die

It’s so easy to grant the mirror power to control what you want to erase                      
Don’t become another victim / “Put a smile on that face”

You gotta be loud / You gotta be rude / so the world can hear you
You gotta be crass / You gotta be cold / it’s everything we know
Turn it up turn it up now
Loud / Rude / When nobody hears you
You gotta stand up / You gotta commit
Say “Fuck It”, make the best of it

The money’s in the treatment, baby, not in the cure
So they fuel your pain with fear and shame and then hand you a brochure
The money’s in the treatment, baby, not in the cure
So they build you up to watch you fall and then beg for an encore

What are you waiting for?


570
Burn it down / brick by brick / Made in 2006
Lost and found / losing grip /  I needed this
Question me not, for I gave up everything
Forget me not, cause I’ve not forgotten what this means

Strip me down, tear me apart, you’ll find one theme left
No sign of stopping till my veins rust
Strip me down, tear me apart, you’ll find one thing left
I fucking know where I came from

..And nothing can replace those lessons learned
as I stood with my brothers on the side of the road
No longer haunted by the skeletons
No longer haunted by the past

For so long, it’s all i’ve known
I’m crossing over the undertow
For so long, no one was listening
Determined to make their deaf ears ring

Miles repeat / my worst enemy… is me.
But then four soon became six… to shatter the canvas
Handed nothing / loss pulling the strings
Outlived the dead trends / united by distance

I’ve been to hell and back, with no promise of return
So I made friends with fire, to keep from getting burned
No money, no sleep. dedication
10 years on the road this is sacred
And when i’m facing a wall, I do not quit
…Cause if you mean it, you will make it.

Pulled apart in a world so demanding
I’m still here, still standing
I’ve sweat blood from Stockholm to Scranton
Still here, still standing.

You can always rinse the surface, but the stain will remain

For so long, it’s all i’ve known
I’m crossing over the undertow
For so long no one was listening
I did my time

You live / you learn / you defy the terms, but this house will be my home
Beguiled / betrayed / it’s the price we pay, as trust will be our tomb

If you mean it, you’ll make it.


Hourglass
I’ve watched the whole world drowning in chemicals
Dissociative / but it takes it’s toll
Can I surpass time, or would I start to rust?
Depreciating / collecting dust

And I fear myself as I fall away  
In a cold deluded sense of fate
When the nightmares come, and the doubt sets in
Will the fever break, or will I burn from within?  

It’s too late to feel, I’ve lost my breath
With the hands of time around my neck
Am I more than the pen that wrote the past?
Or am I just the sand enslaved by the Hourglass?

Will I live again, or will I fade to black?    
Dehumanizing / when the heart attacks      
Will I expire before my dreams unfold?
But if the futures so bright, the path should glow

As the walls melt
and the light fades
I’m letting quicksand take me

If you look beyond the blindfold
You’ll find the hole in my soul
One fear, one mind, no hope, no time
If you look beyond the blindfold
You’ll find the hole in my soul

I’m on the edge of my seat
Holding out for a sign
Trying to rewrite the storyline

It’s too late to feel, I’ve lost my breath
With the hands of time around my neck
Am I more than the pen that wrote the past
Or am I just the sand encased in the Hourglass?

Fear is not my fate


Eternally Yours
Blow the bridge to the past / wipe the fingerprints
Melt your heart encased in wax / steal it with a kiss
Our fate engraved / scar enslaved / as we mutually destruct
Repose, my love, i’ve sinned enough for the both of us

In the name of love…..

I’m ready to bury all of my bones
I’m ready to lie but say I won’t
So tell me your secrets / and join me in pieces
To rot in this garden made of stones
Eternally yours

I feed like you taught me and selflessly swallow
We coalesce in darkness, so selfishly hollow
Examine the wreckage / writhing in tempo
Invisible anguish casting a shadow  

and in the name of love…

I’m ready to bury all of my bones
I’m ready to lie but say I won’t
So tell me your secrets / and join me in pieces
To rot in this garden made of stones
Eternally yours

As we rest in pieces, though I know not your name
I would suffer forever to absolve all your pain

And in the name of love

I’m ready to bury all of my bones
I’m ready to lie but say I won’t
So tell me your secrets / and join me in pieces
To rot in this garden made of stones
Eternally yours

I’m ready to bleed to make amends
And sleep in this dirt we call our bed
So tell me your secrets / and join me in pieces
To fall and rewrite the bitter end
Eternally yours

I’m more than willing to rot in hell with you.

2

MONSTA X for PopTeen (June issue): I.M

— ALL ABOUT YOU

Q1: What is your normal clothing like?
I.M: Comfortable and simple.

Q2: Any hobbies?
I.M: Listening to music, watching videos. Recently I’ve been listening to Eddy Kim’s ‘The Manual’ a lot.

Q3: What is the first thing you do after you wake up?
I.M: Go to toilet.

Q4: What 3 things would you bring to a stranded island?
I.M: Knife, lighter, cellphone.

Q5: If you had a superpower?
I.M: Telekinesis.

Q6: What is the last thing you want to eat before you die?
I.M: Rice cake soup.

— TELL US ABOUT THE MEMBERS

Q1: In one phrase, what kind of group is MONSTA X?
I.M: A group where every member has their own color.

Q2: What is your favourite MONSTA X song?
I.M: Right now it’s ‘Hero’.

Q3: Which member has the biggest gap?
I.M: Minhyuk hyung. When he’s quiet he might give off a cold impression, but when he smiles, he has the brightest smile in the universe.

Q4: Who is the most fashionable?
I.M: All the members. Especially if we compare our clothes from when we just debuted, I think we’ve improved a lot fashion-wise.

— IF THE MEMBERS WERE 〇〇?

Q: If the members were sushi?
I.M:

Shownu: Juicy meat
Wonho: Flounder
Minhyuk: Flying fish roe
Kihyun: Salmon
Hyungwon: Egg
Jooheon: Shrimp
Changkyun: Octopus

Korean translation: @n_ning_2
English translation: @potatoestorm

Actual Cinnamon Roll Mike Faist

•Believes his character Morris Delancey is actually a good guy deep down, even after saying things like “My skull busting arm could use a break" and beating up a crippled boy. (Aka Mike Faist has an unbelievable amount of faith in people)

•Informed everyone of the cookie cake before getting some himself.

•Have you seen the picture of him and Ben Platt cuddling?

•His friendship with Laura Dreyfuss. Too cute.

•Actually named his Newsie Mike.

His hair is on point no matter what length

•He used to beat up on the rest of the Newsies cast, but they loved him anyway

He wears a tiny tie!

•"You know how I feel!“

•He reads Albert Camus before the show

•Always plays the villain, but is the sweetest?!?!?

• His energy when performing King of New York. You can tell he loves it.

•Him and Thanye during King of New York. Yes.

•His friendship with Tommy Bracco. Too pure

•The boy can’t use Twitter for shit, and I live for it.

• Once said his favorite fan moment was when someone asked him to marry them.

He is a tired little cinnamon roll with puffy eyes that need sleep

He wears New Balance shoes (But he also owns converse tap shoes)

Please add more! I love hearing about Mike’s adorkablness.

(If it’s in italics, it’s something my sister said)



Originally posted by savewalterrwhite

instagram

Asexuals are part of my community 💜☻

(also yay Jack Skellington) https://www.instagram.com/p/BTdygNXg2w_/
SHORT IMAGINE

Originally posted by purposeheaders

“HAPPY BIRTHDAY DEAR JUSTIN! HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU!” 

The crowd surrounding the table the cake rest on began cheering as Justin leant over and blew the twenty three surrounding candles placed around the cake.

Once all 23 flames the candles held were blown and shifting into a small stream of smoke, Scooter approached the boy handing him a large silver knife. Justin smiled before cutting into the cake, right until the edge reached the bottom. 

“You touched the bottom!” Jazzy yelled. “Now you gotta kiss a girl.” 

Justin smiled, sliding the knife out of the cake and onto the platter beside it, before leaning over and placing his lips upon mine. With a smile on my face, holding back a laugh, the crowd of family and friends all cheered around us as Justin began to pull away.

His hand slivered over, taking mine in his as he tangled our fingers together before lifting it to his lips, placing a sweet kiss on my wedding ring.

“What did you wish for honey?” Pattie asked. 

Justin smiled, his eyes wandering over to mine “I can’t tell you, or else it might not come true.” 

“That’s just bulshit, c’mon tell us JB!” Khalil shouted from somewhere in the crowd. A few other comments where thrown around throughout Justin’s boys causing a small chuckle to escape his lips at the commotion.

“Aight, aight! I’ll tell you. I wished that we” He squeezed my hand “finally have a bit more luck, receive God’s blessing and get what we’ve wanted since the day we were married.”

Staring into Justin’s eyes, I could see a slight sparkle to them and I instantly knew my face was as red as tomato. “Thank’s baby boy.” I whispered, snuggling closer to his body. Looking over towards Pattie, I spotted her smiling at me, with a look of knowledge in her eyes.

“You guys are so cute it disgusts me.” Maejor sighed. “Time to open presents!” 

The kids got up and squealed in excitment, running over towards the living room. The adults followed suit with smiles on there faces as Pattie, Diane and Chelsey stayed back to cut and hand out the cake. 

My hand slithered out of Justin’s grasp, turning towards them to help before Pattie quickly darted over to my side, pushing me back into the living room. “Oh no you don’t! It’s your husband’s birthday and he’s about to open his presents, go sit with him.”

“Pattie that’s nice really, but I’m not gonna leave you three to do all the work, theres over 50 people here.” 

“And we will handle it. You - just sit down.” With a nudge, I was in the living room walking over to Justin’s side. Justin peeked up, his face lifting up into a smile at sight of me. After placing myself on Justin’s lap, Jeremy was first to walk forward, handing Justin a small box wrapped in birthday paper.

“Thanks dad.” Justin smiled. 

“Happy birthday son.”

After ripping the paper off, Justin was left staring at a box laced with velvet. Picking up the lid, he was met with a beautiful thin gold chain and a brand new guitar pick with the words ‘Music is love, but family is life’ engraved on it.

After thanking his father and opening a few more presents, it was only a matter of time before it was finally my turn. At this point every one had eaten there cake and was sitting in the living room, all ready to open the last present presented by me.

I stood off my husbands lap, walking over to the corner I had left the gift bag in. handing the white bag with the words ‘happy birthday’ written all over it to Justin, I watched as Justin smiled, placing a kiss to my lips.

“You didn’t need to buy me anything baby. Everything I want is right here.”

I smiled at his kind words before forcing him take the bag “Believe me, I think you’ll like it.”

After taking the beg from my hands, he slowly pulled the tissue I stuffed in at the top and tossed it into a ball on the floor beside him with the rest of the wrapping paper.

A confused look crossed his face as he peered inside, searching through a few of the items. Everyone else around us stood back and watched in anticipation and curiosity as to what was in the bag, all until Justin’s face went pale, everyone elses turned to confusion. All except mine.

“What is it?” I smiled.

“Yeah Justin what is it?” Za added. A few similar comments repeated around the room.

Justin didn’t bother looking up, instead just leant back and placed both hands over his face, the bag still in his lap. Tears brimmed in my eyes at his reaction, watching as his body jumped a few times from the sobs he let out.

“Justin baby what’s wrong?!” Pattie yelled in confusion and shock. She stood from her seat, prepared to run forward and comfort her son before I put a hand forward and smiled, mouthing ‘wait’.

Slowly she placed herself back on the seat and watched on, still looking slightly worried. 

“What is it baby?” I smiled, a slight giggle escaping my lips. 

He ignored my question, only leaning his elbow on his knee, with one hand over his eyes. “Are you serious?” He sobbed in disbelief.

“Yeah.” I cooed, allowing a tear to fall down my cheek. 

Justin finally removed his hand from his face, wiping the discarded tears from his eyes before looking back into the bag and picking out two items from the very top. A bib and a pacifier.

Everyone around us gasped, all with smiles on there faces. “Your pregnant?!” Chelsey yelled with a smile. 

Without responding, I leant back into my handbag beside me, pulling out the test I had taken two weeks prior. Giving everyone one glance at the stick, before handing it to Justin who had once again began crying.

“Happy birthday Baby…Or should I say daddy?” I chuckled. 

“Guess you won’t be the only one calling him that anymore!” Za yelled. Everyone chuckled as Justin moved forward and engulfed me in his arms. A few seconds passed before his lips met mine once again and I noticed that as he did all this, his hands never left the spot which was beginning to swell with a beautiful and well earned baby.



Request are open!

Ana

Thinspo Tips
Tips and AdviceThis is a featured page
1. Drink one glass of water every hour. It will make you feel full.
2. Drink ice cold water. Your body will burn calories just getting the water to a normal temperature to digest. Also it is great for your complexion.
3. Drink 3 cups of green tea daily. It will help boost your metabolism, plus its anti-oxidants make your skin look great.
4. Take vitamins daily. Do not take vitamins on an empty stomache, otherwise they have nothing to catalyze with.
5. Eat ice or gum when hungry. This will make your body think it had food without the calories.
6. Do aerobics until you want to faint.
7. Eat spicy foods. They raise your metabolism.
8. Take cold showers because your body will burn calories to heat you back up.
9. DON’T take laxatives. They don’t help you to lose weight.
10. DON’T use diruretics. They only dehydrate you.
11. Brush your teeth constantly so you won’t be tempted to eat afterwards.
12. Weat a rubberband around your wrist. Snap it when you want to eat.
13. Clean something gross (toilet, litter box, boyfriend’s closet) when you want to eat. You will not want to eat after cleaning a litter box.
14. Keep your hair in good condition so no one will suspect anything.
15. Get a job so you’ll have to work through meal times.
16. Exercise twice the amount of calories eaten. 17. Use smaller plates and utensils so it seems like you ate more.
18. Chew eat bite of food thoroughly and then take a sip of water between bites. You will feel full quicker and will not eat as much.
19. Say you are going to eat at a friend’s house and instead go for a walk. You will be burning calories instead of taking them in.
20. Buy clothes that you can’t fit into and hang them wear you can see them. This will motivate you to lose weight to fit into them.
21. Sleep at least six hours a day. If you get less than six this can lower your metabolism by 15%.
22. If you start to feel hungry do situps or punch yourself in the stomach. You will not feel hungry anymore.
23. Pamper yourself! Give yourself a facial, paint your nails, anything to make you feel pretty.
24. Make yourself a snack, but instead of eating it throw it away. Leave the dirty dishes where your parents can find them. They will think you ate.
25. Prepare a list of excuses as to why you can’t eat - You’re sick, you’re a vegetarian, allergic, etc. You’d be amazed at how many good excuses there are.
26. Get out of your house! If you’re not sitting around then people can’t start shit with you about not eating.
27. Join a pro-ana group or start your own website. Anything that will keep you motivated.
28. Make an ANA scrapbook with pics of skinny models. Right down all the reasons you want to lose weight. Keep track of everything you eat. Look at it daily for thinsperation.
29. Keep good posture, burns 10% more calories when you sit up straight.
30. Instead of food, buy something else, a new shirt, flowers, jewelrey etc.
31. Make a list of all the “bad” foods that you crave and tend to binge on. Each day, pick one to take out of your diet that you absolutely, no matter what, cannot eat again. Take one off the list each day until there are no more bad foods you can have.
32. Avoid alcohol! A shot of liquor has 100-120 calories, a glass of wine has 80 calories, a lite beer has 110-120 calories, and a regular beer has 140-170 calories.
33. Never eat anything bigger than about a cup, your stomach will expand and then you’ll get hungry more.
34. Eat in front of a mirror naked. See how much you can eat then!
35. The smell of coffee is suppose to supress appetite.
36. Wear perfectly applied lip gloss. It makes you more aware of what’s going in your mouth. Also, flavored ones help with cravings.
37. Have 6 small meals a day. Take 2 apples, and split them so you can make 6 meals out of them. That way your body will be tricked into thinking it’s eating more.
38. Low calorie hot chocolate curbs chocolate cravings, and makes you feel full.
39. Take anti-heartburn pills if you’re really hungry. They nuetralize the acid that builds and makes you hungry.
40. Take a picture of yourself wearing a bathing suit or something equally revealing, look at it when you want to eat.
41. It takes 20 minutes for the brain to realize the stomach is full.
42. When you get hunger pains curl into a ball, it makes them go away.
43. If you’re a smoker and hungry, light up a cigarette. It curbs your appetite.
44. Eat lots of fiber. It makes you feel full and takes fat with it out of your body. The natural cleansing helps improve both your energy level and overall feeling of wellness.
45. Before you dig into that cake, bag of chips, candy, or whatever, take a deep breath and count to 100. Usually by the time you get to 100 you will have convinced yourself that you don’t really want it.
46. When you’re hungry chug 2 glasses (or how many you need) of straight water. It’ll make you so full and nauseous you will have completely lost your appetite.
47. Celery actually burns calories. Every hour eat a stalk of it. Not only will it fill you up, but it will also get your metabolism kickin’.
48. Weigh yourslef before and after every time you eat. Not only will it eliminate unnecessary eating, but it will make you want to eat less when you see the numbers creep up.
49. Read the nutritional information. Remember, fat-free does not mean calorie-free. Also keep an eye on fiber content. Get as much fiber into your diet as you can, while cutting fat and calories.
50. Don’t eat a lot at once. Spread your food throughout the day. This will help to avoid binging and keep your metabolism going.
51. If you like to drink alcohol, you’ll like this. Make a rule: You can only drink every time you lose 2lbs. So, if you lose 4lbs a week, you can drink Friday and Saturday night. However, if you only lose 2lbs a week, you only get to drink one night.
52. Do not eat in front of the computer or TV. This distracts you from recognizing you’re full. 53. Save the money you would have spent on that meal in a jar. Save it in a bottle instead and watch it grow.
54. Stay away from Slim-fast and other so-called “healthy” candy bars and shakes… one look at the nutition facts will tell you why. With all the carbs and excess calories you may as well go eat a freakin pie or something. Not to mention the rediculous prices… save yourself the money, and the calories.
55. Instead of buying food, buy yourself flowers. Food is depressing, but flowers make you happy.
56. When having cravings drink a couple glasses of water with slices of lemons and count to 100 and it should go away.
57. Eating 100 cals 4 times a day is better than eating a 400 cal meal.
58. An occasional binge doesn’t hurt, in fact it’s quite beneficial if you have reached a plateau (stopped losing weight). Your body will think you have stopped starving yourself, and you will drop at least a pound overnight! Just don’t binge too regularly!
59. Someone told me that if you take a pure cold bath for 15-30 min and lower your body temp, your body burns around 200 cals for every degree it has to raise itself to reach a normal body temperture. This person tried it, a 30 min bath lowered their temp about 3-4 degrees