After months of practicing and growing comfortable and capable with her abilities the young woman had finally been given the all clear to use them in the field. Cisco had even made her a cool suit. Her first mission with Barry seems simple enough, a bank robbery, she probably won’t have to do much at all. However, when they get there, there’s more robbers than expected, and as soon as they enter the building they start firing. One bullet severs the fixture holding a large chandelier to the roof, and Leah is quick to stop it’s descent onto the civilians below, however this takes her full concentration. The first bullet rips through her left shoulder, the second finds home in her ribcage. Her cries of pain are quickly drowned out by the shattering as the chandelier crashes to the ground.
🖍 draws "warpaint" on braig's face (if he lets him lol)
Send 🖍 and draw whatever you want on my muse! || Accepting
He’s… Admittedly a bit confused, and very curious, but he’ll hold as still as he can. The paint was cold, and the scent tickled his nose. He wrinkled his nose to prevent a sneeze, scrunching up his face before realising that’ll mess up the paint. After a moment, he peeks one eye open and grins.
“And then, Dean became a demon. A Knight of Hell actually…”
Dean telling the whole story. Only with a handful of words, a few sentences. From Sam coming back from hell soulless to being stuck in purgatory with Cas to him becoming a demon, a knight of hell. AND - most importantly - leaving out that he was cured. And in this case it doesn’t even matter if he was cured or not, because the emphasis lies on how Dean feels about it and though he might be ridd of the black eyes ( not cured until proven otherwise lol), it doesn’t really change anything about the fact that he still sees himself as a monster, as poison, because that is how he has always felt (though Dean was never poison, he was poisoned - and he had to become a literal monster in order for him to hopefully somehwere down the lines realize that he - as a human - never was one to begin with, but that he fell prey to one, who made him grow up too fast and put too much on his small shoulders. And as strange as it may sound - in a way to Dean feeling like a monster might be the only normal he has come to know, just like hunting is the only normal he knows.
And he tells all of it Marie, who man times over the episode echoed Dean’s words to a T (“The show must go on” is one example) and in that light can be seen as a Dean mirror just as much as the Dean in the play if not more. By “confessing” his story to her, he is reflecting upon himself and is pretty head on working through - even if only superficially at the moment, but it’s a start - what made them become who they are now.
There is something else going on here though and even though I played this part over and over and over again, I still cannot decide how to read Dean’s expressions in this scene where he tells his story. He sounds calm, put together. It seems almost easy. Until he realizes that his true story is ridiculed in a way and not taken seriously. But Dean’s a big boy, he can handle it. ;)
All that being said and as much as we know he struggles and loathes and feels ashamed of what he did as a demon, when he tells that he became a demon and a knight of hell he doesn’t look sad. He almost looks like he is saying “Cool, right?”. It’s a very brief moment, but for a few second it seems there is a certain bit of ~pride in his eyes that completely confuses me. :)
But then again… last episode we had Dean twitchy to go hunting, telling Kate that if you tapped into a certain kind of darkness there is no coming back, wearing sunglasses that give him black eyes and now the confirmation he isn’t sleeping (the same way he didn’t sleep in the end of S9 due to the mark. He tries to be productive though, distracting, polishing up baby and most importantly that one the inside as much as on the outside, which to me bodes well for Dean slowly heading towards a healing curve. Even though while working on the car, the oil and the grime still stuck to him. Baby might be all good again, but on his soul is still a taint like the oil stains on his arms. On top of that I kind of REALLY adore the fact that both Sam and Dean are dressed in grey. Perfectly in the middle. Not black, not white, but somewhere in between. It’s not too hard to fall into the darker shades, but at the same time the lighter tones aren’t too far out of reach either. So where will they go? Well, I think it first has to get a bit darker again - then when no one expects it - so that afterwards they can truly move forward with new strength. fter all, it’s always darkest before the dawn.
It took me a long time to realize that food is not the enemy. Food is Fuel.
2012; i was starving myself, fasting for days. losing ‘control’ binge eating and throwing up whenever I could. I wasn’t happy, my hair was breaking, my nails weak, so tired all the time. I remember when i realized i was actually HAPPIER with myself at my highest weight of 210. I loved myself more when I was bigger, and now all i saw was girl who couldn’t be a thin and no one would even think had an ed under all that fat.
something had to change. slowly. surely.
2013 ( this morning ) I now eat, alot. alot alot alot. i love food and bacon. i love bacon alot. I finally figured out some ideal Macros. i lift weights. Its crazy to see that I am HEAVIER today then i was a year ago. Sometimes its hard to look down and see that I’m farther away from my 'weight goals’. But thats not the only thing that matters, Its taken me a year, and i still slip up from time to time. But I am so happy to be on this journey. <3
there is always hope, you can overcome great challenges. <3 Never Give Up.
What are you opinions in the skinny me tea tox? Not for losing weight just for a cleanse for your system?!
First of all, you don’t need a ‘cleanse’. You have a liver. You got kidneys. You poop/pee. Your body cleanses and detoxifies itself. Those teas are scams, usually laxative teas, that will make you drop a few pounds of poop. Not to mention, those companies have stolen COUNTLESS before and fter pictures of people here on tumblr, including myself, who did not use their shitty products. Don’t waste your money. Drink water, eat healthy, workout. There’s your cleanse.