So in case you dont follow me on twitter, me and @fabjohn have been having some wild adventures together this week and i wanted to share some pics here! We went to a beatle festival together and made close connections with the bands ; ) it was so great!
I just really want my own house with a back yard and a vegetable garden and some chickens and some honey bees, and I’ll do my best to plant lots of flowers that butterflies love, and I can be an urban farmer with a floppy hat and if I have a baby she can sit on a blanket with a sweet mastiff and play with flowers and I’ll watch them while I pick fresh tomatoes and the three of us will go to the farmers market on the weekends and life would be good💖💖💖
So today started out dumb, but this afternoon was AWESOME.
I’m on the porch attempting to construct a railing for the stairs when I notice a weird noise. Like, a kind of droning or buzzing? And it’s getting loud. So I investigate. It’s coming from the neighbor’s yard.
It is a metric fuckton of bees. I have never seen so many bees in my life. It is a fucking swarm of bees, and I have been reading about bees because I got a wild hair a few weeks back about wanting a hive of my own, but haven’t yet convinced Husbandthing, and there is suddenly a SWARMING HERD OF WILD HONEYBEES IN THE NEIGHBOR’S YARD.
I see postings on the neighborhood page all the time for feral swarm collection, but I also know the guy in the house across the alley just set up a hive. “Hey I think your hive escaped,” I text him.
He calls me back about three minutes later. Turns out, the swarm he was supposed to get never came; the company went out of business and his order got cancelled, and he’d found out HALF AN HOUR AGO. And he says he’s got a friend who is a professional beekeeper, and he’s going to go pick her up and would it be okay if they came and got this swarm please please please?
So Bee Neighbor and Professional Beekeeper show up and immediately don bee suits. Apparently there is fierce competition for feral swarms, and the swarm in the neighbor’s tree is HUGE, and also twenty feet off the ground, and Bee Neighbor wants them very badly.
The tree the bees are in is in a yard belonging to neither of us, so we go knock on the door, but there’s no answer. I knock on the house adjacent to it, but that guy’s not home either. Finally, I text the neighbor on the other side of me to see if he’s got contact info for the property owner, who is incredibly shy and in three years has never made eye contact. No luck.
So…we trespass. We get my extension ladder, and Bee Neighbor climbs the tree while Professional Beekeeper stands on the ladder and walks him through the swarm collection. Turns out, you just shake the swarm into a box, and as long as the queen makes it into the box, the rest of the swarm will eventually follow. Bee Neighbor has never collected a swarm before (this is, in fact, his very first swarm of bees ever) and it takes the two of them the better part of an hour in the tree trying to shake the swarm into the box.
Bees eventually get into the box. Bee Neighbor gets out of the tree without dying, and Professional Beekeeper examines the swarm and makes pleased noises. At this point, the box is the neighbor’s driveway, and about two thirds of the swarm is still milling around the box all confused. Since the neighbor isn’t home and we can’t contact him, he risks coming and parking right in the middle of a huge cloud of bees. Professional Beekeeper doesn’t want to move the box too far away, because we risk the milling bees losing the queen’s scent and never going into the box. An equidistant point between the current location and Bee Neighbor’s yard is the top of my recycling bin.
So they put the box of bees on my recycling bin, and I text Husbandthing.
Now I have a box of bees that I am babysitting. They’re being all lazy and dopey and bumbling around. I think I might be in love. Bee Neighbor will pick the box up later tonight and put them in his hive, and then the bees will be MY neighbors too!!
Feb. 10 - Social Media Shenanigans – Jeff kind of wishes that he didn’t know
Kent and Alexei apparently sext each other through Snapchat pretty regularly. 1.3K
“What the hell are you doing?” Jeff asks, a towel over his head as he
enters the locker room.
Kent doesn’t even look remotely embarrassed as he pulls his shirt down and
pockets his phone. “Sexy snapchatting my boyfriend.”
Alexei Mashkov likes his men blond, shameless, and a little stupid, he
supposes. There’s no helping taste.
He shouldn’t be that surprised when, that night while marathoning Game of
Thrones by himself, he gets a notification that he’s received a snapchat from
Kent. When he opens it, he nearly drops his phone and spills his cup noodles
all over his crotch.
Miss you lots babe, when you coming to
Vegas??? Providence is no fun, the caption says. The Kent in the photo is
lying down on what seems to be super soft blankets, the picture taken from the
up-down to showcase Kent’s exceptional abs all the way down to his low
waistband. He has an actual finger in his mouth, like he’s trying to play coy. It’s
clearly sent to the wrong person.
Lizzie Douglas (June 3, 1897 – August 6, 1973), known as Memphis Minnie, was a blues guitarist, vocalist, and songwriter whose recording career lasted from the 1920s to the 1950s. She recorded around 200 songs, some of the best-known being “Bumble Bee”, “Nothing in Rambling”, and “Me and My Chauffeur Blues”.
Once upon a time, there’s a bee. That bee goes to an average bee high school and has no friends. Slowly, after lots of perseverance, he makes friends. They’re good friends, the best friends a bee could have! After a hearty argument, this bee friends notice something. They’re really good at arguments! So good, in fact, that they recommend that they go and join the debate club. That bee turns out to be very good in debate club and becomes top in the entire school, winning one after another until there’s no awards left to win. On top of this, that bee was a straight “A” student and was recommended to go to Harvard.