beer and lemon

Playboy, bad boy Kim Taehyung

Originally posted by namjoonie00

Series genre: Smut, angst, fluff

Description: Kim Taehyung, one of the nastiest human beings you have ever been associated with. You despite even breathing the same air as him yet he still somehow finds a place in your life.

note: Park Jimin will also play a major role in this series. Also, this chapter will have some Harry Potter references that are not absolutely necessary to the story itself. Enjoy!

Chapter 1

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Craig’s Gang as Alcoholic Drinks

Part 2 and follow up to my Main 4 as Alcoholic Drinks post bc @earily asked that if I had more drinks for other characters that I share them, and you bet your ass I’ve got more!

(Although I see him more as part of Stan’s gang, I’m gonna include Butters here because I didn’t add him in the main 4 post)

Craig Tucker: Pisco Sour

  • 1 cup Pisco or White Rum
  • 1 cup Guava Nectar
  • 2 Tsp Superfine Sugar
  • ¼ cup Lime Juice
  • Angostura Bitters
  • Lime Wedges
  • Mint Leaves

In a glass pitcher combine the Pisco or rum, guava nectar, sugar, and lime juice. Add a few shakes of Angostura bitters; stir well to dissolve sugar. Divide mixture among 4 glasses. add ice; top with a lime wedge and fresh mint. (This drink is traditionally made with egg whites instead of Guava Nectar, but I chose not to do that. If you want to make it the traditional way, just substitute the Guava Nectar for the egg whites! It’ll create a cool little foam on the top if you do!)

It’s been a long-standing debate in the fandom whether Craig is a bitter asshole or a guinea pig loving dork. But let’s be honest, the answer is probably a little bit of both! Like Craig, this drink is a little sweet and a little sour. Light and limey, but still strong! Not to mention it’s also the national drink of Peru, so if you’re a fan of the “adopted Craig” headcanon, then this one holds double significance!

Tweek Tweak: Spiked Thai Iced Coffee

  • Strong Black Regular Ground Coffee (Enough to brew 4 cups)
  • 4 Tbsp Sugar
  • 4 Tbsp Heavy Cream
  • 2 Tsp Ground Cardamom
  • 3 ounces Amaretto
  • Crushed Ice

Add the cardamom to the ground coffee. Brew the coffee according to makers instructions. Pour the coffee into a pitcher or large glass. Add the sugar and Amaretto, and stir to combine. Fill four 12 ounce glasses with crushed ice. Pour the coffee into each glass and top each with 1 tablespoon of cream.

It wouldn’t be Tweek without coffee! This drink is sweet and spicy, just the right thing to calm you when the anxiety is hitting hard. But luckily it’s still light enough that it won’t give you a case of the GAH jitters.

Clyde Donovan: The Crybaby

  • 1.5 oz. Breuckelen Glorious Gin
  • 1 oz. Sour Beer
  • ½ oz. Rosemary Syrup
  • ½ oz. Lemon Juice
  • ¼ oz. Yogurt Whey
  • Angostura bitters
  • Rosemary Sprig

In a cocktail shaker filled with ice, combine Breuckelen Glorious Gin, Sour Beer, Rosemary Syrup, Lemon Juice, and Yogurt Whey and shake. Mist with angostura bitters and garnish with a rosemary sprig. Serve neat.

A seriously sour sip to drown the pain of rejection, family deaths, and realizing that there’s no glory in being a pirate (Poor Clyde!). This drink is a little heavier than most others, but if you feel like bursting into tears it could be just what you need!

Token Black: Chocolate Coquito

  • 1 can (13.5 oz) Coconut Milk
  • 1 and ½ Bars (3.5 oz) Bittersweet Dark Chocolate
  • 1 can (15 oz) Coconut Cream
  • 1 can (14 oz) Condensed Milk
  • ½ cup Evaporated Milk
  • 2 Tsp Vanilla Extract
  • ½ Tsp Ground Cinnamon
  • ½ Tsp Ground Nutmeg
  • 2 cups Light Rum

Break chocolate into medium pieces and place in a bowl. In a small sauce pan, warm up coconut milk. Once hot, pour over the chocolate and mix well until chocolate has melted and combined with the coconut milk. In a blender, combine chocolate mixture, coconut cream, condensed milk and evaporated milk. Add the vanilla, cinnamon and nutmeg. Finally, add the rum. Blend until all is well combined. Pour into glass bottles, seal well and refrigerate. Serve cold in small drink glasses and garnish with a sprinkle of shaved chocolate. Shake well before serving. (Note: This drink will become very thick once it gets cold. Let it sit out about 15 minutes before serving to thin it a bit.)

Dark and rich, sweet but not too sweet, with a calming effect and plenty of personality, now that’s a Token drink! Dark chocolate has also been shown to have brain boosting benefits, which even the naturally gifted Token wouldn’t mind, I’m sure! Should balance out the brain stupidifying properties of alcohol! …right?

Jimmy Valmer: Anabolic Steroid (Shot)

  • Blue Curaçao
  • Midori
  • Cointreau

Hold a spoon against the side of the shot glass and allow the alcohol to gently pour onto the back of the spoon into the glass.The Blue Curaçao goes in first so you don’t need to do the ‘back of the spoon’ trick. Fill it about one third of the way up the glass. Next get your Midori, if it helps, rather than pour from the bottle you can pour some Midori into the Midori lid and then pour that onto the back of the spoon really really really slowly. It might look like it’s mixing but if you look from the side you can see there is a difference between the blue & green. So again, another third of the glass is filled and then finally you want to do the same with the Cointreau. Slowly filling the shot glass until you get to the top.

No, this isn’t real steroids like the ones Jimmy used to try to win the Special Olympics, but it’ll make you feel like a w-w-winner regardless! Its vibrancy and fun look is sure to be a crowd pleaser!

Butters Stotch: Topical Painkiller

  • 2 ounces Dark Rum
  • 1 ½ ounces Coconut Milk
  • 3 ounces Orange Juice
  • 3 ounces Pineapple Juice
  • Pineapple Wedge and Cherry to garnish

Fill cocktail shaker about half full with ice cubes. Add Dark Rum, Coconut Milk, Orange Juice, and Pineapple Juice, seal and shake. Pour into a small cocktail glass filled with ice and serve.

Sweet, fruity, and seemingly innocent, but with quiet a bit of feistiness! And after being the butt of so many jokes and suffering parental abuse for as long as he has, well, Butters could probably use some (tropical) painkillers.


Well, that’s it for this one! I guess if people like these, the next post will be drinks for the ladies of South Park!

Superior Ginger Beer

Ten pounds of sugar; 9 ounces of lemon juice; ½ a pound of honey; 11 ounces of bruised ginger root; 9 gallons of water; 3 pints of yeast. Boil the ginger half an hour in a gallon of water; then add the rest of the water and the other ingredients, and strain it when cold. Add the white of an egg, beaten, and ½ an ounce of essence of lemon. Let it stand 4 days, then bottle, and it will keep many months.

You give me flowers resembling Chinese lanterns.

You give me hale, for yellow. You give me vex.

You give me lemons softened in brine and you give me cuttlefish ink.
You give me all 463 stairs of Brunelleschi’s dome.

You give me seduction and you let me give it back to you.
You give me you.

You give me an apartment full of morning smells—toasted bagel and black
coffee and the freckled lilies in the vase on the windowsill.
You give me 24-across.

You give me flowers resembling moths’ wings.

You give me the first bird of morning alighting on a wire.
You give me the sidewalk café with plastic furniture and the boys
with their feet on the chairs.
You give me the swoop of homemade kites in the park on Sunday.
You give me afternoon-colored beer with lemons in it.

You give me D.H. Lawrence,
and he gives me pomegranates and sorb-apples.

You give me the loose tooth of California, the broken jaw of New York City.
You give me the blue sky of Wyoming, and the blue wind through it.

You give me an ancient city where the language is a secret
everyone is keeping.

You give me a t-shirt that says all you gave me was this t-shirt.
You give me pictures with yourself cut out.

You give me lime blossoms, but not for what they symbolize.

You give me yes. You give me no.

You give me midnight apples in a car with the windows down.
You give me the flashbulbs of an electrical storm.
You give me thunder and the suddenly green underbellies of clouds.

You give me the careening of trains.
You give me the scent of bruised mint.

You give me the smell of black hair, of blond hair.

You give me Apollo and Daphne, Pan and Syrinx.
You give me Echo.

You give me hyacinths and narcissus. You give me foxgloves
and soft fists of peony.

You give me the filthy carpet of an East Village apartment.
You give me seeming not to notice.

You give me an unfinished argument, begun on the Manhattan-bound F train.

You give me paintings of women with their eyes closed.
You give me grief, and how to grieve.

Rebecca Lindenberg, “Catalogue of Ephemera,” Love, an Index

2

I waste hours every week trying to post on Tumblr and for whatever reason it does not happen. So I just do what I can do and that’s that. I guess I am pretty blessed to have a few vids make it each week and the photos. So here are some sights from this week (Yes, I am re-doing this post AGAIN):

Above are mushrooms (it looked like two varieties) that I know nothing about. I tried spore printing them to no ado. About half were fed to the compost bin. I love mushrooms; this morning I cooked organic ginger, shallot, and shitake mushrooms in four organic eggs. Good breakfast to say the least. The mushrooms out in the yard though I can’t mess with. I won’t make the same deadly mistake as expert forager Gibbons made; mistaking a poisonous mushroom for an edible. Morels, puffballs, and hen of the woods, oh and sulfur mushrooms I can identify no prob. 

Next I have been watching this “silver back” robin grow through the months. 

I wake up before sunrise most days and go after the moon set or whatever else grabs my eye.

(Going on hours again for a single post… I am about done here)

Cardinal Wired to the Moon

Turkey Vulture Pretending to be a WWII Bomber

The Three Scavengers Approaching a Soul Under the Influence of Moonshine

And above is a first; I made a large organic pan cake adding shredded fresh organic ginger. It turned out great but my foraging mentor gave me something special that I use on rare occasion- lemon curd. It is amazingly awesome. I have never had store bought so I can’t speak for what can be bought. Spreading some of that curd on the cake is like adding the wild strawberries on strawberry shortcake. Curd is like eggs… keep it cold and it will last years.

So besides dehydrating, cataloging record albums, getting packed for the excursion, nature observation, interviewing elders, blogging hours through this week until now with nothing to show for time and time again, organic gardening, spinning some great albums, cooking some great organic food, getting irritated on how the world works sometimes, and how more importantly that other things should never go unemployed… I finally got this post done. SAVE DRAFT for the umpteenth time!

I think that this might have to spin through another night of thunderstorms. The wind in the…

Maybe this will have to spin as well:

Have a great weekend. I am going home to relax and research/search for more words. I’ll be back before Sunday ends. I can’t believe that this finally going to post… I deserve a Stoic for the persistence on this.

Everybody needs to believe in something…

This song always makes me laugh… my German girlfriend at the time I first got this used to sing the opening lines exploding in laughter at the point of “beeeer” I nearly laughed an 8 pack on my abdominals. She was funny. She was not a drinker either she just knew what was put together in an ingenious comical way… and was certainly a great actress… so good that she had me fooled when she said that she loved me. I laugh about that now too. I learned from her that beauty is only skin deep… and under 140 lbs;) I learned that when someone is trying to butcher you and denies it as you are being torn into pieces that it is best to leave that person for good though they are clinging to shred whatever leftover nerves, tissue, bones, and limbs can be had. Being alone, wounded, or whatever is way better than dealing with a liar… any minute and for any duration of time in this life. As the old saying goes as I go home…


Peace.

DIY Spiritual Cleansing Spray!


We all know we should cleanse our homes of negativity from time to time. Not all of us can burn incense, though! Personally, I take issue with most providers of white sage or palo santo due to the plants’ endangered statuses, and because I own a snake, smoke in general is bad news for his health. So what do I do? I use a cleansing spray. Cleansing sprays and smudge sprays from metaphysical stores can be super expensive, but making your own is easy and cheap.

The base recipe requires:

  •     Filtered Water
  •     Alcohol (rubbing alcohol, vodka, any type of liquor will work here. Do NOT use beer/wine/malts)
  •     A Lemon/Lemon Oil/Lemon Juice
  •     A Spray Bottle (I found this one at Safeway in the travel bottles section)


Optional:

  •     Lavender Essential Oil (calms and purifies the air)
  •     Eucalyptus Essential Oil (attracts positive energy)
  •     Water-Safe Crystals (will include below)

Here’s what you do! Fill the bottle most of the way with filtered water. Add a teaspoon of alcohol, and either the lemon oil, juice, or skin of the lemon. I used lemon essential oil here, but you’re welcome to use whatever part of a lemon you like! Lemons have a long-known property of removing negativity and can be super uplifting. Give the bottle a big shake, and you’re ready to start!

When spraying, imagine the spray “misting away” any negativity. Use whatever smudge or smoke cleansing prayer you might like to use as normal.

I also added Eucalyptus & Lavender essential oils, quartz, black kyanite, and amethyst crystals to mine. Eucalyptus and Lavender smell REALLY BAD to bugs (for those of you interested). Particularly spiders! So this is a bug keep-away spray as well. The crystals I use: Black kyanite to remove negativity, amethyst to bring soothing energies, and quartz to amplify the properties of the oils and other crystals. You can absolutely add whatever you like to make your spray personal to you! Customization is the best part of DIY. Let me know if this spray works for you!

Water Safe Crystals for Cleansing/Purifying/Soothing:
  • Any type of quartz (rose quartz, amethyst, aventurine, citrine, carnelian)
  • Shungite
  • Agates
  • Jasper
  • Bloodstone

Other Cleansing/Positive Energy Materials you can use:
  • Rosemary (not recommended for those with epilepsy)
  • Sandalwood oil
  • Salt
  • Cedarwood oil
  • Juniper
  • Rose water
  • Bay Leaves

Do not drink this spray.

Formal Dinner

You had hadn’t even had the chance to ring the hastily installed doorbell, which still had wires sticking out around it, when the back door of the fire house was flung open with the force of a tornado. Holtzmann stood in the entry way grinning with excitement while your finger hovered over the button.
“You’re here!” She exclaimed. Apparently her idea of formal dinner-wear involved a linen pants and vest suit with an impressively ugly printed silk shirt, an even uglier bow tie, and a fedora with a comically large blue daisy stuck in the brim. Before you could respond, she seized you by the arm and practically carried you into the station, up the stairs and into her room.
“What do you think?” Eagerness shone brightly in her eyes as she gestured proudly to the night’s spread.
“It’s…” When the physicist had invited you over for a “super fancy dinner soirée in her private boudoir”, you hadn’t exactly expected a heaping pile of tater tots, root beer, and grilled cheese sandwiches that were underdone on one side and burnt to an absolute crisp on the other, all served on suspiciously exquisite china, although thinking about it, you weren’t sure why on earth you had expected anything else. You accepted a fine, crystal glass of root beer, complete with an elegant lemon wedge garnish and crazy-straw from a beaming Holtzmann.

“Jilly,” you started. “I love it. It’s perfect.” The two of you smiled at broadly at each other. You’d have taken this over a stuffy expensive restaurant any night.

Bond

Originally posted by spngayngels

Pairing: GabrielxReader
Word count: 738
Warnings: None
Request: @lovetusk gabe and child bond by pranking the winchesters, or random people around town.


You pinched the bridge of your nose. “Yes, Mr. Franks…” You sighed. “I will talk to them. Again. I’m very sorry. You have a nice evening.” Hanging up, you let your head fall back. They were at it again. Your ten year old son, and your husband, Gabriel. Of course, marrying the Trickster should have been a clue. He was too damn lovable. This as your third town since Kit was born that you’d lived in. All because of Gabriel and his pranks.

Hearing the door, you got up and walked to the hallway. Raising an eyebrow, you crossed your arms, and they knew. “Hi, honey.” Gabriel chuckled nervously. “Have a good day?” He was trying to get you on the topic of anything but what you wanted to talk about.

“Work was pretty good.” You started, Kit hiding behind Gabriel. “You’ll be happy to know that I got a raise.” You worked in sales, so a raise was helpful. Sometimes you didn’t get many commissions, which sucked. “I get home, and see you two gone. Which is fine.” You shrugged, knowing they were basically best friends. “But, then, I get a phone call. It was Mr. Franks….”

Gabriel winced, knowing he was in deep trouble. “Uh, why don’t you get cleaned up for dinner, Kit?” He nudged your ten year old towards the stairs.

You looked at him. “Don’t think you’re getting off the hook, mister.” Kit nodded and booked it. Rolling your eyes, you looked at your husband. “I’m not going to even waste my breath. You know the usual speech.”

He moved closer, wrapping his arms around your waist. “I’m sorry, it’s how we bond, babe.” You raised your eyebrow. “He’s like a small version of me.”

“And that’s exactly why we haven’t had another. I can barely handle the two of you! Three towns in ten years, Gabriel.” You told him, resting your forehead on his chest.

“Did Mr. Franks tell you what we did?” He asked, smirking. “Come on, did he?” Looking up at him, you shook your head. “We replaced the water in his watering cans with clear Kool-aid.” He laughed. “And the bags of dirt? Crushed up Oreos.” He beamed, so proud of himself. Mr. Franks was an older gentleman who spent a lot of time in his garden.

You couldn’t hold back the chuckle. His humor was a big reason that you fell in love with him. Hearing the phone ring, you groaned. “I’m not even answering that. Just…who did you mess with, and what did you do?” You asked, hoping it wasn’t anything too horrible.

He shrugged. “I may have slipped away from Kit for a little and replaced every DVD in the Henderson house with porn, bad horror movies, and many, many copies of Barney.” Your eyes widened. The Hendersons were pretty much the worst neighbors you had ever had. No one liked them.

“Okay, I can’t be mad about that one.” You admitted. Stepping away, you tilted your head to the side. “Where was Kit?” Knowing them, they literally could have been anywhere.

“I zapped him over to the bunker for a bit. Let him have a little fun.” Gabriel told you with the biggest grin on his face.

Turning to the stairs, you leaned over the banister. “KIT DOMINIC WINCHESTER! Get down here, NOW!” You yelled.

Gabriel slunk back a bit. “Oh, he’s in trouble, you used his full name. And I still say that you should have let me name him Kit Kat.” He muttered.

Whipping your heard around, you narrowed your eyes. “I let you name him Kit, AND you had to piss off Dean by taking the Winchester’s last name.” That led to Gabriel referring to Sam and Dean as his brothers. They didn’t mind Kit thinking of them as uncles, but having Gabriel as a ‘brother’ was a bit much.

Kit sulked down the stairs. “Yes, mom?” He asked, looking at you with his golden brown eyes.

What did you do to your uncles?” You asked, voice low.

“Uhhh….” He hesitated. “I may have put dye in Uncle Dean’s shampoo, itching powder in Uncle Sam’s underwear drawer, and replaced all the beer in the fridge with lemon juice.” You had to facepalm at that. Sighing, you trudged into the kitchen. “Where’s mom going?” Kit looked at his father.

Gabriel looked at his son. “Probably to look for a new house. How’s California sound?”