been wanting to make this for a long time now

Richie Tozier hasn’t spoken a word to anybody since he came to Derry in the middle of the school year. Until he talks to Eddie Kaspbrak.

Previous chapters: Chapter one. Chapter two. Chapter three. Chapter four. Chapter fiveChapter six.


Chapter seven.

It is two days to Christmas. Richie lies and Eddie doesn’t know why. Richie disappears and Eddie doesn’t know where to—and Eddie would call but Richie’s only got Eddie’s phone number, not the other way around. It has been days without word from Richie, and all Eddie can do is hope he is okay. Passing by the big brown house is enough, Eddie supposes; when he is walking down the street he stares up toward the second story window, the one from which music erupts. And Eddie just knows. Richie plays bass from his bedroom in the big brown house. He wants to separate himself, for whatever reason, doesn’t want to talk to Eddie, or hang out.

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anonymous asked:

do you have any words of encouragement for me? I've been trying to write this au of mine for a while now and am completely in a funk despite me knowing the plot and scenes i want to incorporate

sometimes it’s hardest to write when we know exactly what we want to do – i’ve got an au planned out from start to finish and i also can’t bring myself to write it, so i know how you feel. give yourself some space from it, if you need to, but what i would say to do is try and just power through a scene, even if you feel like it’s shit. let yourself at least start writing it, then take a step back and look at it and decide what parts of it are working and what aren’t – maybe what will make it fresh and exciting again is looking at it from a different angle, or changing parts of it you aren’t sold on. it’s not going to get any easier to start something you’re having a hard time with, so don’t feel bad if it’s not any good, because you can always edit it to be better, or scrap it and start over. it’s not a bad thing to do either of those things, because god knows none of us have perfect products the first time we put our pens to paper. funk or no funk, you’ve got an idea worth sharing, and you should let yourself start! i know it’s hard but i seriously know you can do it! 

(also, this is just ambiance, but take the time to make sure you’re in a good space for writing – don’t do it in the middle of the night in the dark when you’re tired, try and sit up straight at a desk or in a chair, have your favorite drink next to you, play some kind of background music or noise to keep yourself focused in, and just let yourself go with the flow.) 

My Sincerest Apologies & Vote + Sneak Peek

So, as you can tell, I have been away for an obscenely long amount of time. To make up for that, I have a new imagine set to come out sometime this week! It’s pretty long, so it should be a good read, and it is my first Bucky imagine! I am really proud of this one and I hope you all like it as much as I do.

Originally posted by 400facts

Also, I haven’t been getting the reactions I expected from the Peter Parker series that I had hoped for. Please let me know whether you want me to keep it going or put it on hold for now.

And finally, to make up for the time that I’ve been away, here is a sneak peek of the new imagine!

Atlas: Heart - Bucky Barnes

Bucky was always on the run. After Washington, nowhere was safe as long as he was in reach of HYDRA.

He took a plane to Munich, Germany, but didn’t stay there long, as the memories from the War were taunting him. Slowly but surely,he made his way to Bucharest, Romania, where he finally felt okay. Not safe, he was almost certain that he’d never feel safe again, but he felt okay, which was the best he would get after Hydra.

He found a small apartment in the city and laid low for as long as possible, only going out when he needed groceries, and occasionally he would take a stroll through the market, buying fresh plums and when he had a sweet tooth, some tarts.

He hadn’t truly taken in his surroundings in Bucharest. Sure, he’d walked the streets and gazed up at the architecture and visited the a few parks, but he didn’t know anyone.

Sometimes when he was in public he would pick up on names of others, but only by what the people with them called them. He knew the man that always sold him plums as Mr. Ciora.

His next-door neighbour was Mrs. Henderson, who was an elderly Englishwoman whose apartment always made the halls of the complex smell like cookies.

Other than that, there wasn’t really anyone else that he knew- not that he really knew them anyway.

It was a Wednesday morning when he finally made contact with someone besides the friendly smiles he sent to those who greeted him. He was headed out for his weekly trip to the market when he was shoved backwards by a large box, carried by two legs beneath them.

“Sorry!” The box chirped, lowering to the ground to reveal a woman’s face. She gave him a crooked grin as she made met his eyes.

Bucky felt lost for words. Her eyes sparkled as she smiled at him and her skin practically glowed. His breath caught in his throat, and his heart began beating faster.

“It’s- uh, it’s okay,” he muttered, keeping his gaze low.

“I’m just moving in, I’m just upstairs.” She told him, motioning to the rather heavy looking box.

Bucky only nodded in response.

“I’ll just be on my way then,” she excused herself, no longer able to stand the awkward tension. She heaved the box into her arms and slowly struggled up a few steps.

He considered continuing on with his journey to the market, but there was something pulling him towards the woman.

“Wait,” he called after her. “Let me carry that for you.”

She turned and looked at him as he pulled the box from her grasp. “Oh, thank you!”

The walk up the stairs was silent until the two began up the second flight.

“I’m (Y/N), by the way.” She moved to shake his hand, only to pull back after she realized that his hands were full.

Bucky considered giving you a fake name, but he felt a connection towards you. He almost told you his nickname, the name he’d gone by for his whole life, but he wanted a fresh start. He made a quick decision.

“James,” he smiled.

-H

8

The great thing about what we do, any art, is anybody can read into it what they want to take from it. - Katie McGrath

5

love doesn’t discriminate between the sinners and the saints
it takes and it takes and it takes

I met Joe Alwyn!!!

So, I was walking around my neighbourhood minding my own business, when I went inside a café to have a drink, and there he was!!! He was with a couple of other actors from Operation Finale, paying and getting ready to leave. I decided to approach them and I was so nervous that I started talking to the other actors first, who were all super nice! Then I finally got the courage and approached Joe. He is such a sweet heart! I told him I loved his work on Billy Lynn’s Halftime Walk and he thanked me, so I asked him for a picture and he agreed. Then I told him that I was a swiftie and to please say hi to Taylor and to ask her to come here to Argentina. He said he had no idea she had never come here and that he would tell her! I asked him if he was having a good time here and he said he hasn’t been here too long but that yeah, he was having a great time. Then I thanked him for his kindness and left, I didn’t want to bother him or impose on him. He was really kind and smiling all the time, I still cannot believe that I got the chance to meet him!!!!

Also, he is so gorgeous in person! Like, the photos do not make him justice! Now I get what Taylor was singing about (well done girl, well done!!!)
@taylorswift please thank him again for me, will you? :)

Why is this short film important?

Whaddup. I’ve been waiting for this day for a long time now and it’s finally here.

I wanted to make this post more serious and analytical so here it is. I’m Cloud and this is why the short film “In a Heartbeat” by Beth David and Esteban Bravo is a masterpiece and why you should care.

This short film that was released today has been through kickstarter and I know that kickstarter projects are well… Unreliable. So I was really scared for the success of this project considering that I’ve seen many other kickstarter projects have popped out sloppy, horrible, and downright awful. Yeah, talk about a waste of dough. But I’m happy to say that this wasn’t one of those fails. The creators of this short film were very determined and weren’t going to give up on this.

This short film has something we like to call good representation. Needless to say spoiler warning so I’m gonna get right into the story. The short film takes place through the eyes of Sherwin a closeted schoolboy. Who has a classic crush on another schoolboy. Enter love interest Jonathan. Just from the concept art it was established that Sherwin was head over heels for Jonathan.

That is something a lot of kids experience, crushes but not all kids have the challenge of being outed to a world and society where they could be ridiculed and possibly slaughtered for their feelings. And I know that sounds scary but it’s true some kids are just in dangerous unaccepting environments, so it’s easy to see themselves in Sherwin.

Sherwin isn’t the best at expressing his feelings and nor does he really want to because he’s closeted. But that’s not healthy at a young age to try to hide your feelings when they’re so deep. So his love is personified into this very adorable heart. This heart is Sherwin’s desire to be with who he wants even if it’s another guy and nothing’s stopping it except Sherwin. This carries the message that love is love even if it’s not from a man to a woman and vice versa.

So through the short film this heart is just going out there to be with Jonathan and Sherwin is struggling to hold it back. Suppress his feelings should I say. And it reaches this point where the cartoon heart is showing it’s affections in public in front of the school. The homophobic surroundings are then very real and puts both Sherwin and Jonathan on the spot. And this scene at 2:18 is the breaking point (pun not intended). Just this shot is showing how the two characters have this pure bond but yet everyone else sees it as a disgusting display. Now everyone can see it Sherwin isn’t in the closet anymore and put himself out there. So now that he’s out and exposed for what happens his heart breaks. Literally.

And the doors close on Jonathan with a piece of the broken heart now aware of Sherwin’s sexuality and feelings. So basically Sherwin symbolically came out to him but shrunk and ran away with his romantic feelings in shambles. And media wise that’s usually the end of it for queer characters. Nothing. No love, no affection, just a broken spirit. We see him outside the school with his broken heart.

But then Jonathan comes and fixes the broken heart. Returning his feelings and showing support and acceptance by sitting next to him with the repaired heart. And in the end both of their hearts come together. So finally the gay characters get a happy ending after years of bury your gays and homophobia. There’s happily ever after.

This film shows the struggles of real people and there’s no dialogue either so literally anyone can enjoy this without any language barriers or translation errors. That’s what makes good representation showing the struggles and themes that a group of people experience and even flipping the script and giving them a good ending.

I apologize for spelling and possibly grammatical errors but I wanted to get this out soon. Thanks for reading.

Originally posted by yavileto

You know what’s a really good ATLA scene

In Southern Raiders when the gaang swoops down to rescue Zuko and leaves Azula to plummet. And Zuko looks over, seeing his baby sister falling to her death, and is stricken by this sudden complicated emotion of “Did I want this…?” Sure, Azula was there quite literally to kill him. She’s tormented him his whole life, mocked him for being slotted for execution by their own father, hunted him down mercilessly. And yet Zuko spent such a long and complicated time vying for her approval, her affection. Zuko thought he wanted acceptance from Azula and their father both, so much so that he chose to betray Iroh in Crossroads of Destiny. And moreso, Azula has always been perfect. There was never any defeating Azula. There was only escaping from her. And in this moment Zuko is stricken with the realization that Azula can lose, Azula can die, and he mutters out this single, confused “She’s…not going to make it” as he watches her fall. Azula dying never seemed possible. And now it’s in front of him. Undeniable, irrevocable. Does he want this…? Should he let this happen…? Is there anything he can do to try… to maybe……

And then Azula pulls this Sick Fucking Move and rocket launches herself toward the wall and uses her own hair pick to anchor herself to the sheer cliffside and just stares at him gloatingly like “bitch you thought” and all complex emotion fucking vanishes from Zuko’s mind and he returns fully and completely to “jaded inferior sibling mode” and just goes “Of course she did” and stops thinking about it because. You know. Whatever. He coulda done that too he just didn’t try. 

Fucking Azula. 

That asshole. 

I’m sure you’ve heard a million times over how important it is to comment on fanfiction - maybe even from this blog. I’ve been a frequent advocate of supporting stories with feedback, often reblogging posts about its importance (and even making one or two of my own). For me, every time a post about comment culture crosses my dash I find a fresh determination to be a commenter and vow to leave feedback on every fic that crosses my dash from there on out.

But here’s my secret: sometimes, I don’t feel like leaving a comment.

It’s not that a fic is undeserving or that I have nothing positive to say, in fact it’s usually quite the opposite.

Sometimes, I look at the large number of comments a fic has already received and I think “What difference will it make if I just add to the masses?” But then I remember how excited I get every. single. time. someone leaves me feedback, how much my heart soars whenever I receive a comment notification.

Sometimes, I see that a fic has zero to little comments and I think “Oh, it would be awkward if I was the only commenter, I don’t want to stand out.” But then I remember the stories I’ve published that never received any responses, merely gathering a few reblogs and a handful of likes and leaving me disappointed and discouraged.

Sometimes, I read a fic long after it’s been posted and I think “Why bother commenting now? It’s way too late for that.” But then I remember that one time someone found a fic of mine months after it had been posted and still left a comment, making me feel as though my story had a permanence and a lasting impact.

Sometimes, I read a fic that is already multiple chapters in, and I think “I can’t possibly comment on any chapter but the last, otherwise it’s going to seem strange.” But then I remember all the effort that goes in to a single chapter, all the courage it can take to publish those words and how reassuring it can be to hear that a particular piece of a story had an impact.

Sometimes, I read a fic and I can’t think of anything insightful to comment, and I think “If I don’t have anything profound to say, I may as well say nothing at all.” But then I remember how it feels to stare at a blank comment section, wondering where exactly my story went wrong and wishing for even the smallest of reassurances.

And sometimes, I read a fic and I’m just tired, and I think “What’s it going to hurt if I just skip the comment this time? Who will even notice?” But then I remember how much time and energy a writer put into their story, how exhausting writing can sometimes be.

I read a fic, I remember these things, and I decide to leave a comment. 

Comments, from the smallest of keyboard smashes and heart eye emojis to the largest of analyses, mean the world to a writer. A comment can be the difference between an abandonment and another update, the divide between a story of requirement and a story of passion. Comments truly are everything to a writer, and they require so little from each one of us.

So please, I beg of you: swallow your excuses, realize that leaving feedback has an impact that extends beyond you, and LEAVE THAT COMMENT.

history of the entire world, i guess; a transcript

hi. you’re on a rock, floating in space. pretty cool, huh? some of it’s water. fuck it, actually most of it’s water. i can’t even get from here to there without buying a boat. it’s sad. i’m sad. i miss you. how did this happen? a long time ago, actually never, and also now, nothing is nowhere. when? never. makes sense, right? like i said, it didn’t happen. nothing was never anywhere. that’s why its been everywhere. it’s been so everywhere, you don’t need a “where”. you don’t even need a “when”. that’s how “every” it gets. (pause). forget this. i wanna be something, go somewhere, do something. i want things to change. i want to invent time and space. and i know it’s possible because everything is here and it probably already happened. i just don’t know when to start. and that’s exactly where it started. (background noise) woah. i… paused it. i think there’s a universe now. what’s it made of? quarks and stuff. ah, that’s a thing, in a place. don’t like it? try a new place, at a different Time™. try to stick together because the world is gonna get bigger and emptier. but it’s not empty yet. it’s still very full, and about a kjghpillion degrees. (about no seconds later). great news! the quarks are now happily married in groups of three called a “proton” or a “neutron”. and there’s something else flying around too that wants to join in but can’t cause it’s still to (HOT). (about ten minutes later). great news! the protons and the neutrons are now happily married to each other (some of them even doubled up). (about 380,000 years later). great news, the electrons have now joined in. congratulations, the world is now a bunch of gas in space. but it’s getting closer together and it’s getting closer together and it’s getting closer together. it’s a staaaar. new shit just got made. some stars burn out and die. bigger stars burn out and die with passion! and make some brand new way crazier shit. space dust! which allows newer, more interesting stars to be made, and then die, and explode into even crazier space dust. so now stars have cool stuff around them, like rocks, ice, and funny clouds, which can make some very interesting things. like this ball of flaming rocks, for example. holy shit, we just got hit with another ball of flaming rocks, and it kinda made a mess. which is now the moon. weather update: it’s raining rocks from outer space. weather update: those rocks might’ve had water inside them and now there’s Hot Steam in the sky. weather update: cooler temperatures today, and the floor is no longer lava. weather update: its raining. severe flooding alert: the entire world is now an ocean. volcano alert: that’s land. there’slifeintheocean. what? something’s alive in the ocean. oh cool, like a plant or an animal? no. a microscopic speck! it lives at the bottom of the ocean and eats chemical soup which is being served hot and fresh made from gnarly space ingredients leftover from when it was raining rocks or whatever. oh yeah, and it can do that. it has secret instructions written inside itself telling it how to build another one of itself. so that’s pretty nifty, i would say. tired of living at the bottom of the ocean? now you can eat sunlight. using a revolutionary technique you can convert sunlight into food. taste the sun. side effect: now there’s oxygen everywhere and the sky’s blue. then the earth might’ve been a snowball for a while, maybe even a coupla times. it’s a sponge, it’s a plant, it’s a worm and some other types of weird strange water bugs and strange fish. it’s the Cambrian explosion. “wow, that’s animals and stuff.” but we’re still in the ocean. hey, can we go on land? NoO. why? the sun is a deadly lazer. oh okay. not anymore there’s a blanket. now the animals can go on land. come on, animals, let’s go on land! “nope, can’t walk yet. and there’s no food yet so i don’t care.” (100 million years later) ok, will you learn to walk if there’s plants up here? “maybe,” said some bugs, and fish. “uh. uh. uh.” (five million years later) “ok so i can go on land but i have to go back in the water to have babies.” (idea) learn to use an egg. “i was already doing that.” use a stronger egg, and put water in it, have a baby, on land, in an egg. water is in the egg, baby, in the water, in the egg. works for me. bye bye ocean. aaand now everything is huge. including bugs. wanna see a map of the land? sure. ah fuck, now everything’s dead. just kidding here are the survivors. keep your eye on this one because its about to become the dinosaurs. here’s another map of the land. yeah, it broke apart, don’t worry about it, it does that all the time. here comes a meteor. and the dinosaurs are gone. its mammal time! here come the mammals. look at those breasts. now they’re gonna dominate the world, and one of them just learned how to grab stuff. and walk. no, like, walk like ‘that’. and grab stuff at the same time. and bang rocks together to make… pointed rocks. “ouch.” and set things on fire. “yeouch.” and make crazy sounds with their voice (“gneurshk.”) which can mean different things. that’s a human person. and now they’re everywhere, almost. ice age. what? you can walk over here? cool. not anymore. i guess we’re stuck here now.

let’s review. there’s people on the planet. and they’re chasing their food. fuck it, time to plant some grass. look at this, i control the food now. now everyone will want to be my friend and live near me. let’s all build houses except mine is bigger because i own the food. this is great, i wonder if anyone else is doing this. tired of using rocks for everything? use metal. it’s underground. better farming was just invented in a sweet dank valley right in between these two rivers, and the animals are helping. guess what happens next. more food, and more people who came to buy the food. now you need people to help make the food and keep track of the sales. and now you need houses for people to live in, and people to make the houses. and now there’s more people and they invent things, which makes things better and more people come. and there’s more farming and more people to make more things for more people. and now there’s business, money, writing, laws, power. sociiiety. coming soon to a dank river valley near you. meanwhile, out in the middle of nowhere, the horse is probably being tamed. why is all my metal so lame and lumpy? tired of using lame, sad metal? introducing bronze, made with special ingredient tin from the far lands of tin land. i don’t know, my dealer won’t tell me where he gets it. also, guess what - egypt. meanwhile, out in the middle of nowhere, they figured out how to put wheels on a horse. now we’re getting somewhere. also, china. and did i mention indusrivervalleycivilization. norte chico. the middle east is getting more complicated, maybe because it’s in the middle of the east. knock knock- er, clop clop, it’s the people with the horses? and they made an empire! and then everyone else copied their horses. greeks! ah look, it must be the greeks, or a beta version of the greeks. let’s check in with the indus river valley civilization. they’re gone. guess who’s not gone? china. new arrivals in india. maybe it’s thosehorsepeopleiwastalkingabout or theircousinsorsomething. and they wrote some hymns and mantras and stuff. you could make a religion out of this. there’s the bronze age collapse. now the phoenicians can get down to business. also, can we switch to a metal that’s a little easier to find? thanks. look who came back to israel, it’s the twelve tribes of israel. and they believe in god. just one though, he’s got like a ten step program. here’s some huge heads, must be the olmec. the phoenicians make some colonies. the greeks copy their idea and make some colonies. the phoenicians made a colony so big it makes colonies. here comes the assyrian empire. nevermind it’s the babylonian- median- it’s the persian empire. “wow, that’s big.” ah, the buddha was just enlightened! who’s the buddha? this guy, who sat under a tree for so long that he figured out how to ignore the fact that we’re all dying. you could make a religion out of this. oops, china just broke, but while it was breaking confucius was figuring out how to have good morals. ah, the greeks just had the idea of thinking about stuff. and right over here, alexander just had the idea of conquering the entire persian empire. it’s a great idea, he was…great. and now he’s dead. hopefully, the rest of the gang will be able to share the empire evenly between them. knock knock, it’s chandragupta, he says, “get the hell out of here, will you get the hell out of here if i give you 500 elephants? ok thanks bye; time to conquer all of india- or most of india”. but what about this part? that’s the tamil kings, no one conquers the tamil kings. who are the tamil kings? merchants, probably. and they’ve got spices. who would like to buy the spices? “me,” said the arabians, swiftly buying them and selling them to the rest of the world. hey, china put itself back together again with good morals as their main philosophy. actually they have three main philosophies. out here, the horse nomads run wild and free, and they would like to ransack your city. let’s check the greekification levels of the greekified kingdoms: greekification overload! “bye,” said the parthians, “bye,” said the jews. “hi,” said the parthians, taking over the entire place. “heyyyyyyyy,” said the romans, eating the entire mediterranean for breakfast. “thanks for invading our homeland,” said the jews, who were starting to get tired of people invading their homeland. “hi, everything’s great,” said some guy who seems to be getting very popular, and then gets arrested and killed for being too popular, which only makes him more popular. you could make a religion out of this. want silk? now you can buy it from china! they just made a brand new road to the world…or you can get there on water. “sick, new trade routes,” said india, accidentally spreading their religion to the entire southeast. hmm, that’s a good place for an epic trading kingdom. there goes buddhism, travelling up the silk road. i wonder if it’ll reach china before it collapses again. “remember the persian empire? yup,” said the persians, making a new one. axum is getting so powerful they would like to build a long stick. has anyone populated madagascar yet? let’s do it together. china is whole again…then it broke again. still can’t cross the sahara desert? try camels. “hell yeah, now we’ve got business,” said the ghana empire, selling lots of gold, and slaves. “hi i live in the roman empire and i was wondering, is loving jesus legal yet?” “no” “actually ok sure,” said constantine, moving the capitol way over here to be closer to his main rival. don’t worry about rome, it won’t fall. it’s the golden age of india. there’s the gupta empire. not chandragupta, just gupta, first name chandra, the first. guess who’s in rome? barbarians. what’s a barbarian? “non-romans,” said the romans, being invaded by non-romans. r.i.p. roman empire. or actually, just half is just fine. but it’s not in rome anymore so let’s give it a new name. the mayans have figured out the staaars. oh, and here’s a huge city, population everyone. the göktürks have taken over the entire eurasian steppe. great job, göktürks. how’s india? broken. how’s china? back together. how’s those trading kingdoms? bigger, and there’s more of them. korea has three kingdoms. japan has a kingdom, it’s the sunrise kingdom.

deep in the arabian desert, on the top of a mountain, the real god whispers in muhammad’s ear, so he goes down to the cube where everyone worships gods, and he tells them their gods are all fake. and everyone got so mad at him that he had to leave town and go to a different town. you could make a religion out of this. and maybe conquer the world as well. the roman empire is long gone, but somehow the pope is still the pope. plus there’s new kingdoms all over europe. i wonder if there’s room for moors. here’s all the wisdom, in a house. it’s the baghdad house of wisdom, just in time for the islamic golden age. “let’s bring stuff to the coast and sell it, and become the swahili on the swahili coast,” said the swahili on the swahili coast. remember this tiny space you have to go through to get from here to there? someone owns that now. wanna get enlightened in the middle of nowhere? the franks have the biggest kingdom in europe, and the pope is so proud that he invites the king over for christmas. “surprise, you’re the new roman emperor,” said the pope, pretending to still be part of the roman empire. then the franks broke their kingdom into what will later be called france and not france. the northerners, or just norse if you don’t have that much time, are exploring. they go north, from the north to the northern north, and they find some land. two types of land, and they name them accordingly. they also invade some other places and get called many names, such as vikings. there’s the rus, the kievan rus. are they vikings? “i don’t think so,” said the kievan rus. ok, fair enough. the pope is ready to make some more emperors of the roman empire, the holy roman empire. it’s actually germany but don’t worry about it. new kingdoms! christianizeallthekingdoms. which brand would you like? “mine’s better,” “mine’s better,” “mine’s better”. “time to conquer england,” said william. it’s a bird, it’s a plane, it’s the seljuk turks. “ahh!” said the byzantine empire, who’s getting so small it almost doesn’t exist anymore, “we need help!” they need help, so they call the pope. “hey pope, can you help us get rid of the seljuks? maybe take back the holy land on the way? come on, i know you wanna take back the holy land.” “yes, i do actually want to do that. let’s do a crusade.” crusade. they did many crusades, some of which almost didn’t fail, but at least the italians got some sweet trade deals. goodbye mayans. hello toltecs, goodbye toltecs, hello mississippi. look at those mounds. there’s the pueblo. i always wondered how to build a town in a cliff. guess who’s here? khmer. where? here, and pagan is there, and vietnam unconquered itself, korea just became itself, and japan is so addicted to art that the military might have to take over the government. china just invented bombs, and typing. and the mongols just invaded most of the universe. nice going, genghis. i bet that will last a long time! some of the islamic turks were unaffected by the mongol invasions because they were busy invading india. is it tonga time? i think it’s tonga time. i just found out where the swahili gets all their gold. look at this chad (means lake), there’s an empire there, right in the middle of africa. the king of mali is so rich he’s going on tour to let everyone know. “wow, that guy’s rich,” everyone said. the christians are doing a great job of conquering iberia which will soon be called spain and not spain. please remain christian. we will check in later to see if you are still christian when you least expect. whoops, half of europe just died. ming. china’s back, yay. hey khmer, time to share, new kingdoms here and there. oh look who controls all the islands, its the mahajapit. majahapit, mapajahit, mahapajit, mapajahit, majapahit? oh, italy’s really rich, time for them to care a lot about art and the ancient classics. it’s kinda like a rebirth. here’s a printer, lets make books. so you think you can conquer the byzantine empire? “yep,” said the ottoman turks. nice job, ottoman turks. whoops, you missed a spot; don’t forget to ban europe from the indian spice trade. “what? that’s bullshit,” said portugal, spiceless. well i guess we’ll have to find another way to india. “wait,” said christopher colombus, probably smoking crack, “if the world is round, lets go this way to india!” “nah, don’t worry we already got this,” said portugal. so chris goes to spain. “hey spain, wanna hire me to go find india by going around back of the world?”  “no.”  “please?”  “no.”  “please?”  “no.” “please?” “ok.” so he sails into the ocean, and discovers more ocean, and then discovers ‘the indies’ and ‘japan’. let’s draw a line to decide who gets which half of the world. the aztec and inca empires are off to a great start. i wonder if they know that europe just discovered their continent. the habsburgs are marrying into so many royal families they might have to start marrying each other. move over lithuania, here comes moscow. ivan wants to make russia great again. move over timurids, maybe go invade india or something. persia just made persia persian again. let’s make it the other kind of islam, the one where we thought the first guy should’ve been the other guy. hey christians, do you sin? now you can buy your way out of hell. “that’s bullshit, this whole thing is bullshit, that’s a scam, fuck the church, here’s 95 reasons why,” said martin luther, in his book which might have accidentally started the protestant reformation. “you know what would be magnificent?” said suleiman, wearing an onion hat, “what if the ottoman empire was really big, which it is now.”  “what if russia was big,” said ivan, trying not to be terrible. portugal had a dream that they controlled the entire indian ocean, including the spice trade, and then that dream was real. and spain realised that this is not india, but they pillaged it anyway. “damn,” said england and france, “we gotta start pillaging some stuff.” then the dutch revolt and all the hipsters move to amsterdam. “damn,” said amsterdam, “we gotta start pillaging some stuff.” question one: can you get to india through north america? no, but at least there’s beaver. question two: steal the spice trade. that’s not a question but the dutch did it anyway. sugar. guess where all the sugar’s made? in brazil. stolen! in the carribean, and it’s so goddamn profitable you might forget to not do slavery. the next thing on russia’s to-do list is to get bigger. britain and france are having a friendly discussion about who should control the entire world, more specifically, ohio. then it escalates into a seven year discussion, giving prussia a chance to show austria who’s boss. but what about britain and france, did they figure out who’s boss? yes they did, it’s britain. guess who’s broke? also britain. so they start taxing the hell out of america.

“fuck you,” says america, declaring their independence, and fighting for it. france helps them win, now france is broke. and britain will have to send their prisoners to a different continent. wait if france is broke, why do the king and queen still wear such fancy dresses? “let’s overthrow the palace and cut all their heads off!” said robespierre, cutting everybody’s head off until someone eventually got mad and cut his head off. you could make a reli- no don’t. haiti is starting to like the idea of a revolution, especially the slaves, who free themselves by killing their masters. “why didn’t we think of this before?” wait, who’s in charge of france now? “me,” said napoleon, trying to take over europe. luckily, they banished him to an island. but he came back. luckily, they banished him to another island. there goes latin america, becoming independent in the latin america wars of independence. britain just figured out how to turn steam into power, so now they can make many different types of machines and factories with machines in them so they can make a lot of products real fast. then they invent some trains, and conquer india and maybe put some trains there. “hey china,” said britain, “buy stuff from us.” “nah, dude we already got everything,” says china. so britain tried to get them addicted to opium, which worked actually, but then china made it illegal and dumped it all into the sea. so britain threw a hissy-fit and made them open up five cities and give them an island. britain and russia are playing a game where they try to stop each other from conquering afganistan. also the sultan of oman lives in zanzibar now, that’s just where he lives. india had a revolution, and they would like to govern themselves now. “nope,” said britain, governing them even harder than before. technology is about to go crazy. the united states finally figured out whether slavery is good or bad. “it’s bad,” they decided. and then they continued manifesting their destiny, which is to kill the rest of the natives and take their land, and maybe kick out the mexicans too. “i know, let’s rape africa,” said europe, scrambling to see who could rape it the fastest. they never got ethiopia.  britain and france are still hungry. they never got thailand. the united states ran out of destiny to manifest, so they’re looking for more. hawaii. cuba. wait spain controls cuba. “well, blame something on them and go to war! what should we blame on them? let’s blame the maine on spain!” so they blame the maine on spain. now we’re in business. to celebrate, they kick panama out of panama and make a canal, connecting the two oceans. britain just found oil in the middle east. it makes cars go. china is so tired of being bossed around that they delete their old government and make a new stronger government, which is accidentally weaker and controlled by a guy from the previous government. europe hasn’t had a war since the last war, so they start world war one. look at those guns. it’s gonna be a great war, so great we won’t need a second one. after it’s over, they blame germany. russia went on strike and the workers overthrew the government. now everyone’s paycheck is the same. communism, in the soviet union. the arabs revolt, and britain helps. now the ottoman empire is gone, so we can give the jewish people a place to live. hopefully the arabs won’t mind. “let’s cut the cake,” said sykes and picot, carving up the remains of the not-so-ottoman-anymore empire. except turkey, turkey makes a brand new turkey. and then the saudis conquer arabia. it just seemed like the right thing to do. hello? yes, it’s the 1920s calling. let’s get in a car and drive to a party and listen to the jazz on the radio and go to the movies. the economy’s great and it’ll probably be great forever. just kidding. germany’s back, featuring hitler, the angry mustache model. he’s mad at the jews for existing. japan is finally conquering the east, and they’re so excited they rape nanking way too hard. they should probably just deny it. hitler’s out of control, so the international community tackles him and tries to explain to him why killing all the jews is a bad idea, but he kills himself before they could explain it to him. that’s world war two. bonus round: pacific showdown, united states versus japan. fight! finish him. let’s unite all the nations and have some world peace. seems legit. “hi i’m gandhi and if britain doesn’t get the hell out of india i’m going to starve myself in public. wow, that worked?” bonus: now there’s pakistan. actually two pakistans. one of them can be bangladesh later. the jews and the arabs finally figured out which one of them should live in the holy land. “me”, they both said at the same time. “let’s divide up the land so everyone’s happy.” sike! they both get angrier. look out china, there’s a new china in china. what’s on the menu? communism! “no thanks,” said the other china, escaping to an island. i wonder which one is the real china. there’s the korean war, korea versus korea, nobody wins, then it’s on pause forever. let’s meet the sponsors. oh, it’s the two global superpowers. they’re having a friendly debate over which economic system is good and which is an evil virus of satan. and they both have atom bombs. fight! wait no that would be the end of the world. let’s just keep it cool and spy on each other instead. and make sure we have enough atom bombs. “i’ll race you to space. now let’s make some more countries fight themselves.” europe is tired of pillaging other continents, so the continents they were pillaging are tired of being pillaged. so here’s a new map, with new countries. now you can’t tell who they’re being pillaged by. the united states finally decided whether racism is good or bad. they decided it’s bad, and the world agrees. south africa might need another minute to think about it. let’s check the world population. woah. okay. technology’s better too, that might keep happening. the soviet union decides to relax a little and accidentally falls apart. europe makes a union, so now they can all use the same money; except britain because they don’t feel like it. let’s check the mail. surprise! it’s on the computer! whoops, someone just attacked america, i bet they’ll remember that. phone call, surprise, it’s in your pocket! wanna learn everything? surprise, it’s on the computer! now your phone’s a computer, which is in your pocket. whoops, the economy just crashed. don’t worry, the big banks won’t fail, because they’re not supposed to. surprise, flying robots! with bombs. wanna print a brain? some people have no friends. some people have no food. the globe is warming, and the ocean is full of plastic. “let’s save the planet,” said everybody, not knowing how. “let’s invent a thing inventor,” said the thing inventor inventor, after being invented by a thing inventor. that’s pretty cool. by the way, where the hell are we?

Sometimes i forget Camp Camp is technically an adult cartoon

And honestly? That’s, oddly enough, one of the main reasons i love this show so much. This is gonna be kind of a long one, so buckle up.

Let’s be real: We’re living in the golden age of animation. When you compare the amount of hard work, love and passion that’s put into modern day cartoons, to how it was just about 20 years ago, you can clearly see a big difference in quality.

Some of the best and most popular tv shows of this era have been cartoons aimed at kids. That’s pretty amazing, and i feel like we take it for granted because we’re so used to it by now. At this point, “kids’ shows” barely have a target audience anymore. A few examples would be gigantic worldwide hits like Gravity Falls, Adventure Time, and so many more. Both of these shows are well-known among kids AND adults for their incredible writing and animation (i’m personally a big fan of both, but trust me, i’m trying to be as unbiased as possible lmao).

Adult entertainment is…different. You have a lot more options when it comes to a show aimed at an older audience, which means it’s also a lot easier to screw up completely.

For a long time, kids’ shows were quick and easy to produce, because of the idea that kids are so easily entertained that you didn’t have to put any effort into making a high-quality product. Breaking this ideology was the main goal that big animation companies like Disney strived for, which is why most of their movies are of such high quality, while still appealing to people of all ages.

But when it comes to a show that’s strictly meant to appeal to a mature audience, ESPECIALLY animated ones, a similar ideology has been tossed around for AGES. I think a lot of you know what i’m talking about: Lazy, crude humor. Writing without substance. As many adult topics as possible, to make sure it’s nothing like a kids’ show.

The idea that “mature” ONLY means “haha sex and profanity”, is really just as bad as what i talked about earlier. Sure, there are quite a few really good adult cartoons out there (Bojack Horseman, Rick & Morty, The Simpsons) who have a clear understanding of how to handle mature topics in, well, a mature way. But i think Camp Camp really stands out, and here’s why.

Please look at this official artwork of the show:

If you were like me and you didn’t know any better, you’d definitely assume this was a show for kids. Then you’d watch it, and almost flinch the first time you hear Max say the word “fuck”. But you know what’s funny?

Even WHEN you’re watching this show, it’s not just the cutesy art style that messes with you. Because Camp Camp plays out and feels like a show for kids.

If you were to take out all the sex jokes and swearing, this would be your average kids’ cartoon. Like…..literally. I’m not even sure if it’s intentional or not, but i refuse to believe that this is just me. The way the characters interact, the way the jokes are build up, the way the stories are told. Even when one of the characters are on fire and the kids outside are screaming and throwing bombs around, it somehow manages to give off those cozy and goofy vibes of a typical Cartoon Network show.

Camp Camp is chaotic, bloody and filled with jokes that would never get past CN censors. But at the same time, it just feels…genuinely “fun”. Not even in a jokingly funny way, but it just has this very pure and innocent sense of childish fun. Like, come on. If it wasn’t for the furry orgy at the end, “Journey to Spooky Island” was pretty much just a casual Scooby Doo adventure.

I would go further in-depth about how good the writing of this show is, but that’s not really the point of this post. The main thing i’m trying to say, is that Camp Camp is one of the only adult oriented cartoons i have ever watched in my entire life, that actually feels like a modern cartoon for kids. And hey, maybe that’s why it actually has a fair amount of young fans!

i. i think of all the people i thought i loved and i laugh. it’s a long list, and for a long time i thought there was something wrong with me for being the only one of my friends who had never fallen in love, never fallen so fucking hard that my bedroom floor had a hole shaped like my body.

ii. you laughed and i swear to god, seriously, i almost cried. it was beautiful. that’s not to say that it still isn’t, i’m sure it is, it’s just, i haven’t heard your voice in months and so, i can’t use present tense. i’m only fooling myself. i erase my call log frequently but, i can’t bring myself to erase the proof that you were once here.

iii. our love was held together by pepsi and walks by the lighthouse and caramel frappuccinos and rainy days and extra large packages of extra gum that had 35 sticks instead of 18. i think i dropped my heart in the water when you told me you were leaving. i think i left it there for safe keeping but, i can’t bring myself to get it back.

iv. we haven’t spoken in a little over a month but it feels like it’s been longer. i think you stopped caring when you knew you didn’t have to pretend anymore. i think your liberation from my mess of emotions was the only thing you got out of what we had.

v. it’s weird to think that there were people before you. i had my first kiss in the 8th grade and i thought i loved him. a little over a year later i thought i was in love again and a year later and a year later and then, i kissed you. i loved you. i think for a long time i tried to convince myself that i didn’t want to kiss you, and when i did, i knew i had been wrong from the start.

vi. i haven’t deleted our pictures. i know i said i would, i know i told my friends i have, i know i’ve told my mom i don’t miss you anymore and i know i go outside now and i smile at the sun, but i think that missing someone is harder than it looks. self help books tell you to use distractions and make plans and talk to your friends, but i’ve done exactly that for the past 8 months and my neck still has a bruise in the shape of your lips.

vii. it was raining the first time you kissed me. the storm almost blew us away but we held onto each other and you drank my coffee and i leaned on your shoulder and we watched the world fall down around us. i think when you’re 16 you feel so invincible that you try and walk right into the eye of a storm. that’s what i did that day. i came back, broken, mangled, torn apart, but i came back.

viii. the day you left, i cried. i know this isn’t a surprise, i think anyone who lost the person they built their world around would cry. it’s been 8 months, and i still don’t know what happened. if love is real, then so is closure, it has to be. i never got it. i don’t know how you managed to break a shattered thing, but you did.

ix. i still love you, please call me.

they call her maid maleen

for the first few trembling years of her life, she is a princess. she is the daughter to the king, born of his beloved wife and of her visage. her dark eyes have the appearance of a smoky quarts and her mother carefully twists her mass of black hair into a hundred small braids down her back. she is a beautiful, quiet child, and for a while all is well. they call her princess maleen.

then her mother dies. it seems as if the king is determined to bury his love for his daughter along with his queen. he moves her to a different wing of the castle, and refuses to see her. her tutors are let go, and the nobles’ children are no longer allowed to play with her. only the maids look after her now.

the king remarries. the new queen gives birth to a son, and maleen is forgotten completely, banished from a home she still resides in and a life she can now only watch unfold.

the maids take care of her, braid her hair and kiss the blisters on her fingers, teach her to scrub at porcelain and polish silver, to clean a fireplace and mop polished marble floors.

they call her maid maleen.

~

the king has a son by his new wife, and then a daughter. they are pale and fair-haired like their mother, with only their dark eyes to show they are the king’s children. but they inherit none of their parents’ beauty, have faces that don’t look quite right and bodies that get stuck between gangly and chubby and never settle into one or the other. princess gisella and prince jan are privately regarded as unfortunate products of a lovely union.

maid maleen spends long hours working, and has neither the time nor funds for creams to soften her skin or oils to care for her hair, has never used face powder or lip color.

maid maleen is twenty three years old, and the most beautiful woman in the kingdom.

her braids are wrapped carefully atop her head, but when she lets them loose they hang past her hips. her dark skin is made even darker thanks to long hours working in the palace garden, and her eyes have never lost that same curious light. she walks straight and strong, years of hard labor giving her muscles and definition to her body that she never would have had as a princess. boys and girls give her long, considering looks and flirtatious smiles, and nobles have to double-take when she passes them by.

no one speaks of it anymore. but maid maleen looks ever more like her beautiful late mother, has the same eyes as her father, and dressing in ill-fitting cast offs and running her ragged can’t hide the truth.

maid maleen is the king’s daughter.

she has accepted her life as a maid in the palace she was one day set to inherit, and tries to see it as a gift. she sleeps with who she likes, may marry whichever of the charming boys from the city who’s smile she likes best. in the maids who raised her she has more mothers than she has fingers, and perhaps she longs for the days when she was a small princess, when she was the apple of her parents’ eye, when the whole of their nation was to be hers to inherit.

but then the blacksmith’s daughter lets her hands linger a little too long on her wrists, and maleen knows that she won’t be sleeping alone tonight. there are some things that worth more to her than a throne she was born to. she doesn’t miss the little girl she used to be.

until.

tensions have always run high between their kingdom and the neighboring one – too many squabbles over borders, over trade agreements, over patrols, over anything and everything the kings can find a reason to be upset about, it seems like. so when prince wolfgang is sent over, the whole palace is abuzz. the prince seems determined to inherit a peaceful land, and is coming over to talk with the king to do it.

maleen does not care for princes. nor for nobles of any rank, in fact. she remembers how they turned on her, she sees the small acts of pettiness and cruelty they thoughtlessly inflict on their servants, and she wants nothing to do with it. commoners may not be as educated as nobles, may not have as many objects to call their own, but maleen finds she prefers their company to that of lords. she’s uninterested in this prince, which is perhaps why she’s the one that gets sent to his rooms. her moms can trust that she at least won’t fawn over him.

“sir wolfgang,” she murmurs, pushing open his door and giving a low curtsy, keeping her eyes trained on his mud covered boots. “is there anything you require?”

silence. she can only stay bent in a curtsey so long before she loses patience. she’s almost given up on him, is about to cut her losses and call it a night when he says, hesitant, “queen sabine?”

her mother’s name is punch to her gut, and her head snaps up at the sound of it, the rolling fire of her temper bubbling just below her skin. “i am maid maleen,” she snaps, then tacks on “your highness,” after a moment’s consideration.

his cloak is half unbuttoned as he stares at her with a slack mouth. she supposes he would not look unhandsome if he were not currently doing his best to imitate a frog. he appears to be only a handful of years older than she is, and if she were not furious she would be impressed that he remembers her mother well enough to see sabine in her.

“maleen,” he repeats, and for a moment she wonders if he will recognize her as well, but he only says, “my apologies. if you would help me with my cloak, i would be much obliged.”

she’s instantly suspicious. she’s met nice nobles before, ones that were considerate and remembered her name and thanked her when she brought them wine. but she’s never met a nice prince before – they’re always of the worst sort. “yes, your highness,” she says, and the cloak is soaked through and clinging, it’s no wonder he’s struggling with it. once she’s gotten it off she hangs it to dry, then goes back to him. she slaps away his numb, struggling fingers and undoes the rest of the buckles and loops of his overly complicated clothing. she’s gotten down him down to an undershirt and pants when his hands grab hers. she blinks and looks up. he has freckles dusting across his nose.

“this is inappropriate,” he says, but honestly she’s stripped a lot of nobles, it wasn’t weird until he took her hands and looked at her like no one’s ever looked at her before.

“yes, your highness,” she agrees, and takes a step back. she places his clothes in front of a fire, curtsies, and leaves. she can feel the weight of his gaze on her all the way back to her room.

wolfgang continues his diplomatic agenda, having long meetings with the royal family. after, maleen goes and tends to him, setting out his food and taking care of his clothes, straightening up any mess that he’s made. at first he’s quiet, and he just watches her, but he quickly discovers that maleen has opinions and thoughts and isn’t afraid to share them. soon they’re debating the finer points of trade routes and arguing the effectiveness of a sliding tax scale, and maleen comes to cherish the evenings she spends with the prince, likes the way he speaks to her and looks at her, likes the shape of his smile.

weeks in she enters his room, dinner steaming in her hands and eager to continue their conversation about state funded orphanages versus a state funded foster system. he’s pacing and tense, shoulder stiff. “wolfgang,” she sets down the food and wipes her hands on her apron, “is something wrong?”

“is it true?” he asks, and he’s not looking at her. he’s always looked at her before.

“is what true?” she flinches away from his coldness, is already preparing to retreat and hide and beg someone else to watch over him.

he turns to her, and she’s baffled by the mixture of hope and anger on his face. “are you the king’s daughter? are you princess maleen?”

she takes a step back, “i am maid maleen.”

“please,” he follows her as she steps away from him, and her back hits the wall. he stops when he’s almost close enough to touch. “my father sent me here with the goal to seal our new treaty with a marriage. he expects me to marry princess gisella. but if you are the daughter of the king – then he will allow me to marry you instead!”

“who says i want to marry you?” she retorts, but he gets on bended knee and she freezes.

he holds a hand for her own, and against every bit of logic, she gives it to him. “maleen, i’ve never felt this way about anyone. i was willing enough to enter a loveless marriage before i knew what true love is, but now i do, and i can’t go back. marry me.”

she wants to. she thinks she loves him. she hadn’t been planning to fall in love with anyone. “i am the king’s daughter,” she tells him, “but i am no princess. i haven’t been a princess in a long time.”

he brings her hand to his mouth so he can kiss each one of her knuckles, “then we’ll have to change that.”

~

wolfgang goes to the king to make his case, to return maleen to her birthright and allow her to marry him.

it goes even worse than maleen had feared.

her father is furious. he’s so angry at the audacity of this request that prince wolfgang is thrown from the kingdom. so incensed is he, that guards drag maleen from her bed in the middle of the night and throw her into a tower. the door closes shut behind them, and she bangs on it and screams but no one comes for her.

there are no windows, and only one door with a sliding metal grate in the bottom. she’s high in the tower, she thinks, from the number of steps she’d been forced to climb, but she stands on a dirt floor. the room contains only the bare minimum needed for survival, and nothing more.

once a week food is slid through the slot in the door. she has to be careful, because if she eats it too fast they will not provide more, she will just starve. days turn to weeks turn to months, and she despairs of ever being let out of this tower. months turn to years, and she gives up hope entirely of leaving this tower. she considers refusing to eat, killing herself slowly through starvation, because death is preferable to life locked in this tower.

one night there’s a scuffle, and shouting, and for the first time since she was shoved inside the door opens. there’s a guard standing there, and princess gisella tentatively steps inside. “maid ma – i mean, maleen?”

maleen stares. this is the first time she’s seen another person in years, and suddenly for all the screaming she’d done she can’t find her voice. gisella takes another cautious step forward, “maleen, please – we don’t have much time.” she holds out her hand, “come with me.”

gisella is sixteen now. although she’ll never be a great beauty, she’s grown into many of the features that she was once mocked for. “where?” she asks, but takes gisella’s hand and lets her lead them down the twisting staircase. anyplace is better than the tower.

“i’m to be married in a week’s time to prince wolfgang.” maleen feels a sharp pain go through her chest. had wolfgang forgotten her? their farce of a romance was such a quick, shallow thing. she was a fool to fall for it in the first place. “i’m not going to show up. you are.”

she stares, “what?”

“wolfgang started a war over father locking you in the tower,” she explains, “but eventually it got to a point where neither could justify it, so our father and wolfgang’s decided our union would mean peace between our countries, as intended. but i don’t want to marry prince wolfgang, and he does not want to marry me.”

“i don’t understand,” she hadn’t paid much attention to the girl when they were in the palace together, and she’s regretting that now.

they finally reach the end of the tower. it’s the first time she’s breathed fresh air in years. she tries not to get distracted by it, and instead focuses on the carriage to her left, and the pure black mare laden like a pack mule on her right. “i’m leaving,” gisella says, “i don’t want to be wolfgang’s bride because i want to be klaus’s,” the guard smiles, and he must be klaus, the princess is rejecting a prince to run away with a commoner. “there’s a map and everything you need in the saddlebags. the wedding dress is waiting for you at the castle. no one will know you’re not me until wolfgang unveils you, and by then it will be too late. he will marry you, and i will be gone.”

“why are you doing this?” she asks.

gisella shrugs, “you’re my sister, and father is an idiot. i want you to be happy, and i want wolfgang to be happy, and i want to be happy too. this way we all get what we want. our brother will be waiting for you in wolfgang’s castle. he’ll help you.”

maleen is speechless. gisella grabs her in a quick hug – the only one they’ve ever shared – and then goes to the carriage with klaus trailing behind her. “i’ll see you again, princess maleen!”

she doesn’t have time for tears. she gets on the mare, and rides for the palace of the neighboring land.

~

she makes it just in time. she sneaks into the castle the night before the wedding, ducking around servants until she find her way to jan’s door. she knocks, tentative, wondering if this was a mistake and all one elaborate trap. but the door opens and his face slackens in relief, “finally!” he pulls her inside, and sits her down. there’s lukewarm water waiting for her so she can clean herself, and jan stands with his back to her the whole time, outlining the wedding and how it will go so she knows what to expect the next day. “father isn’t here,” he assures her, “he didn’t want to leave the kingdom, so i’m here in his stead.”

“won’t you miss your sister?” maleen finishes washing and wraps herself in a soft blanket.

“when i am king, gisella will return,” he says confidently, “she will come home and bring klaus, and you will rule here with wolfgang, and all will be well. our countries shall be great allies when it is me and wolfgang on the throne.”

he’s only a year older than gisella, just seventeen, and maleen feels oddly old next to them, feels old next to these children who know what they want and take it and don’t let anything stand in their way.

“we need to get your hair rebraided,” he says, “you should look perfect tomorrow. it’s your wedding day.”

she stares, aghast. “that will take all night!”

“i’ve brought help,” he says, and sends a servant down the hall. the servant returns with a half dozen of the maids who raised her, and who crowd forward and hug her and kiss her cheeks and say how much they’ve missed her. princess or not, bride or not, to them she will always be their little maid maleen.

~

it’s clear gisella picked her wedding dress with maleen in mind. it fits her for one thing, and is clinging and heavy, and it must have looked awful on gisella, but on her it’s perfect. her dress is accompanied by white silk gloves and a thick veil so that no one can see her, so that no one will know she’s not the daughter of the king they’re expecting to be there.

wolfgang is at the end of the aisle, looking like he’s going to an execution, and it takes more self control than maleen was anticipating not to go running to him. she turns to him, and he lifts her veil. he sees her and freezes, mouth sliding open. she winks at him, because they just need to keep it together until they’re married, he just has to keep his cool for a few minutes and they’ll have won it all. wolfgang closes his mouth and says nothing about how this is clearly not the bride he was supposed to marry. they turn so none of the guests can see them, and the priest gives maleen a confused look, but with a glare from wolfgang he continues on with the ceremony as if nothing is out of place.

“you may now kiss the bride,” the priest says, after what seems like an eternity.

wolfgang grabs her about the waist, dips her, and kisses her soundly on the mouth. her veil falls off and she can hear the horrified and shocked gasps of the guests, and under that jan’s laughter. when they break apart, foreheads still pressed together, she whispers, “hello, prince wolfgang.”

he kisses her again, quick and sweet, and does nothing at all to disguise the joy in his face. “hello, princess maleen.”

and they all lived happily ever after.


read more retold fairytales here

2 | Jealous

A NIGHT AT HOME | JUNGKOOK VERSION 

WORD COUNT: 5,378

warnings: graphic smut, dirty talk, spanking, oral sex, fingering, rough sex, asphyxiation (choking), ass play, degrading names, dom!jungkook + sub!reader

Originally posted by junghope

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i really like the concept of an ice fighter in overwatch , and thought id give a shot at making one in tf2 ! i havent played overwatch, so uh, i dont exactly have a grasp on what kind of character mei is/ any attacks.

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he got in an accident when experimenting with the gun and froze his right arm off (definitely not an excuse to give an oc cybernetics.,., cause cybernetics are cool) he reloads his gun with the cell packs on his belt, they slide out and refill through the tubes connected to the liquid nitrogen storage tank on his back. (i’m definitely gonna fix this to actually be accurate,,, and i also havent figured out his attacks yet . may need help with that if anyone has suggestions !!) im still figuring out his design, but im very happy with the way this came out :>