because-i-no-longer

160723 Seventeen Twitter Update

[ORIG] [17’s 정한] 안녕하세요 정한이 왔어요ㅎㅎ
[TRANS] [17’s Jeonghan] Hello, Jeonghani has comeㅎㅎ

[ORIG] [17’s 정한] 이제 갈래요ㅎㅎ 다음에 또올테니까 오래 기다려용~~ㅎㅎㅎㅎㅎ 안녀엉♡
[TRANS] [17’s Jeonghan] I’ll go nowㅎㅎ Wait a bit longer because i’ll come back again next time~~ㅎㅎㅎㅎㅎ Goodbye♡

Trans © Pledis17@tumblr

au where ford follows basic lab safety protocol

Take a Moment to Read-Please Reblog! Emergency!!!

I’m making a new post since nobody seems to be donating at all. Uh. My paycheck bounced, I have to pay rent, job stuff is shitty right now. I do tarot readings and also I do art, but I cannot pay anything right now. My power bill is past due but I have no way to pay for it. My rent is due at the end of the month and I don’t know how I’m going to pay for it. When we run out of toilet paper I don’t know how to buy more. We’re in need of a grocery trip but we cannot pay for it. Nobody has really donated and I just survived 3 months of bad abuse. My mental health is on the fritz but I cannot stop working, and despite how much I’ve been working, my boss is firing everybody and I no longer have a job because he downsized, so it was quit or be fired.

Every day I cannot help but just sob because I’m so scared I’m not going to get through the end of this month, and I have nowhere to go–if I become homeless I will die because my body cannot survive the weather of night due to my disability.

Please donate if you can to my paypal, which is transdragoning@gmail.com, or please reblog if you can’t. Any testimonials to my character are welcomed to show that I can be trusted. I’m a very hard worker but right now I’m in a really though spot.

There are other ways to say I miss you other than I miss you. And that’s me gluing the cracks of my hours with writing in my journal, jotting down the right words to entertain that my sadness was happy or wasn’t there, or reading a young adult novel with a cliché ending; at least it was still possible in fiction, or watching the whole season of another TV show, or eating it all out because anything that comforted my stomach, eased my heart’s hunger pangs too. And I did it all to pull it down into minutes until it has collapsed into seconds with the night closing before my eyes only to open with another morning that I no longer want to see, because the cracks of those last hours of March dented my memory to a season of mourning. Strangers walked past me, a dozen of them familiar with the scent of you as they leave without a second look that I am looking, searching for another face in their face. I only want you here instead of me wishing you were, instead of me crying in the shower, instead of me falling apart over and over the thought that there’s another day empty of your warmth, because it has been filled with distance. And because of that, I miss you more, more than the words more can define. Is there even a definition worse than dying, because this is it. This is the ultimate meaning of crying in a funeral over something that’s still alive, and I know nothing will help but to do everything I can to still be alive so hopefully I can wake up one day saying I don’t miss you anymore. I don’t miss you anymore, but the clock has your hands pointing in the direction of your bed at home, where your arms are waiting, and I only want to be held there. In this time of desperation, if I give in to it I only suffocate with my heart on my throat with the words I miss you. Now, even more. So when the clock finally stops, and the time is over, maybe there wouldn’t have to be ways where I can say I miss you since with you, time didn’t matter. It was too slow, and too fast, something in between, but I knew every second was worthwhile.
—  i’m not going to say i miss you // s.c

ways to kill Vladimir:

  • get him to absorb a lot of tainted blood
  • disable/corrupt his blood so he can’t heal from wounds
  • drown or suffocate him
  • play Riven 
My proud artistic identity is not unlike my proud gay identity. I would be gay even if I spent an entire lifetime in perfect celibacy. The same is true of my Jewish identity; I remain a Jew even when working on the Sabbath, eating shrimp with lobster sauce at Uncle Chung’s Szechuan Restaurant, or praying with monks in a Catholic monastery, cloistered in the mountains above Big Sur. These things are who I am: artist, Jew, faggot. This is so because I say it is so. I could make a longer list, but I think I have made the point.
5

1) Tiny oak leaf lettuce plant I’m trying to revive in a window that gets loads of light. The leaves are finally identifiable now!
2) My sage plant!
¾) Tiny banana pepper plants I need to separate soon. They will probably never set fruit because it is almost fall (took longer to grow than I expected) but that’s okay!
5) Tiny butter crunch lettuce!

All the quitters out there, I feel u.

I struggle to understand the negativity that comes along with the word “quit”. The term isn’t defined with failure, or giving up, it simply means to leave—to stop what your doing and move on.

Quitting does not deem you weak or fragile, it only shows that you’re progressing. I’ve quit relationships, I’ve quit school, and I recently quit my job. Not because I failed at anything, or couldn’t bare a challenge. I quit because I needed to end a sentence before it ran on and no longer made any sense.

When I hear someone use the word quit, I don’t punish them by picking at their faults. I don’t consider them a loser for not trying harder. Since when is life a competition anyway? Instead praise them for how strong they are—how strong it is to know what you want for yourself and take action.

It’s OK to say, “you know, it just wasn’t for me.” It’s OK to feel down about yourself. It’s OK to change. It’s OK to quit.

To quit is to begin again—to loose what is holding you back. By quitting you’re allowing yourself to learn and grow. What’s so negative about that?

So you quit something, congratulations on entering into a new realm of endless possibilities…go get em tiger!

Day 36: Playing a musical instrument

100 Day Action Challenge

Still a day behind. But might be able to catch up today if I don’t go overboard! This took longer because I tried an angle I didn’t know how to draw and the anatomy and details yikes oh well!  

Prescilla actually doesn’t play an instrument! But recently @mermaidchimney and I concocted a headcanon..or I guess AU where @mermaidchimney‘s Areli, and my Prescilla exist on the same plain of DA universe and xe teaches her how to play piano. She’d never get very far to be honest. She’d get bored and give up in frustration. The only reason she enjoys singing is because it came naturally to her. She only lasts as long as she does bc she has a crush on her instructor :P

Thank you Cait, for letting me borrow Areli!!! <3 I’m sure Prescilla appreciates it even more ;)

Anyway I listened to THIS SONG the entire time. 

I don’t know. I’ve always sort of… Expected to be/become mentally ill. There’s too much history in this family for me realistically anticipate otherwise. It happened and continues to happen and it’s OK.

I also wasn’t surprised when I started getting chronic illness stuff, like the vague flu like full body pain fatigue stuff I’ve seen in so many other trauma survivors. It all seems part of the same package.

But losing my hand function… Came out of left field. I don’t know what to do with it. I never planned for this (like anyone ever plans for this) and I feel so lost. I have to reevaluate every part of my place and I’m terrified. Cascades washed and brushed my hair today because I can no longer do this for myself. I’m so scared. I’m trying to not let it consume me

Beach City Drift was a great episode. Although I wonder how Stevonnie was able to drive.

I was hoping that Kevin would get redeemed or something, but I guess not.

But I’m glad Stevonnie made another appearance. They don’t get enough screen time.

So now we have to wait two days until the next episode. The next week will be an exciting one, I can imagine. I’m really looking forward to Monster Reunion and Alone At Sea.

I know Monster Reunion will be about you-know-who. I saw the clip, and I’m excited.

I know that there were leaks for Alone At Sea, but I didn’t see any of them because I decided that I was no longer going to be watching any more clips or pictures from unaired episodes. I know it’s the one where Lapis and Steven are on a boat and I heard somewhere by accident that it’s the one where Greg goes fishing. But I don’t think it’ll be just that. I have a feeling it’ll be something more than just fishing, but I don’t know. We’ll just have to wait and “sea” for ourselves haha.(Honestly I really can’t wait to see this episode and the wait is killing me).

Six years ago I was this very depressed 15 year old girl who was extremely close to giving up. But then, someone referred me to this British singing show. They gave me a website that uploaded the episodes as they aired, and that’s how I was introduced to the five boys that made me feel just a little less lonely, and made me want to stick around for just a little bit longer. Because you see, I was constantly bullied because I was different from my peers. I liked different things, I wasn’t as outgoing as my classmates. I was considered weird and I didn’t really have friends. And then I saw these boys and they were so strange? They said awkward things and they were weird on camera and yet, people still seemed to adore them. They were loved for all the reasons my peers seemed to hate me and it just made me feel so much less alone, that there were others who were a bit like me. And that’s always what drew me to One Direction.

The way they acted on stage and on camera, and how they were with each other. They gave me a sense of safety that I’d never felt before. I know a lot of drama happens with this fandom but regardless, I love these boys to death. These five boys grew up with me, and when I felt lonely and scared, they were there to make me laugh. Their presence in my life has made a big difference that I will forever be grateful for.

And I think that the best thing they ever did for me was help me meet my best friend, who was so curious about One Direction and the conspiracies surrounding them. She’s not one to randomly go up to someone and make friends, but she knew I was a fan of theirs and so something made her approach me and now here we are four years later.

So, I know I always joke and say “I’ve been wasting my life on a boy band for six years” but honestly, had it not been for them, a lot of good things wouldn’t have happened to me. And I don’t think I would have stuck around this long.

Happy six years, boys. I am eternally grateful towards you. All five of you.

All the love xx

If you watch Dan and Phil on YouNow please read!

Ok so YouNow has made an update which takes away the “Replay” option so that only people who pay to subscribe can go back and watch all old broadcasts. They are no longer free.

This means that you currently cannot watch any of Dan and Phil’s old broadcasts on YouNow. Dan and Phil don’t have a subscribe option, so their Replays are unavailable to everyone.

And as a gif maker, this is very frustrating because I can no longer go back and make gifs of old broadcasts to post for you all!

Please sign this petition for YouNow to bring back free Replays!

anonymous asked:

Hi! I love all your barrisco art and recently saw a westallen piece you did and was hoping you might draw Barry/Cisco/Iris cuddles? <3

Took me too long to get this done but here ya go! It’s movie night and Iris promised not to fall asleep…                

FAHC Gavin’s coming up to bat in my headcanon series. 

Gavin Free who grew up pretty well to do in the money area. Who’s parents were almost never home as a result, who grew up with Nanny’s taking care of him instead of his real mother. Who only ever gets parental attention when he does something extraordinary, so he takes up gymnastics in middle school, and is naturally fantastic, his parents come to the matches he could win medals at, all the others the only person in the audience Gav can count on being there for him is Dan, and that’s okay because Dan is his best friend, his B, he’s a good support system, and even taught Gav how to fight right for his own size after his mouth got him in trouble one too many times.

Gavin who comes out to his parents at 15 and is emotionally disowned, who only remains part of the Free family for appearance sake, who has a stupid amount of money funneled into his personal account after his parents force him to promise via contract not to mention his oddity in public, who basically moves in with Dan and his mom after the incident. Who would rather sleep on Dan’s bedroom floor than in the fluffy feather bed at his parents’ house, because Dan’s house is warm and welcoming and he can be himself without consequence. 

Gavin Free who rebels in any way he can without his sexuality coming out, who pierces both his earlobes, nose and gets an industrial in his cartlidge all in one day just to spite his parents, who gets ridiculously drunk at parties and gets really publicly stupid. Who embarrasses his family name in any way he can possibly find. 

He gets involved in a gang by accident at 17. He and Dan had rented a flat for the summer, just to see what it might be like to live on their own. Gav gets corned one day when he’s walking back from Tesco with a carton of milk and a few bags of crisps by a huge man with squinty rat eyes and a lot of messy prison tattoos. The guy won’t let him pass until Gav asks what he wants, the guy tells him he’s seen him at gymnast meets (Gav finds out later the guys daughter was on one of the teams at his last meet), tells him he sees potential in him as a runner for the gang, is offered a job he can’t refuse without fear for his life. Who goes home to Dan shaking and near tears about what just happened. Dan comforts him, begs him to be careful, and promises to keep him safe in any way he can.

Gav gets stuck in the gang, moves up the ranks from runner to negotiator, who can spin words as beautiful as gold but as false as the promises of safety he hands out at the beginning of meetings. Who still, no matter how high he rose, did not want to be in the gang at all, because it scared him, because he was skinny and lithe and who’s only muscle is the thin cording you get from heavy cardio, who can’t aim a gun at first to save his goddamn life.

Gav who shows up to a job one night where he needs to negotiate the release of a girl his age, another 18 year old kid, one of the boss’ daughters taken prisoner over a gun deal gone south. Gavin who tries his damnedest to save her, and once he thinks he’s bargained her life back into their hands and the rival gang leaves, springs on the girl tied to the chair, only to lift the burlap sack off her head to find her hours dead already because the other gang had killed her before they got there. Gav who leaves immediately after that via a window to keep from facing the guards outside the door, who goes home to his and Dan’s flat, crying full out, and gives a gasped explanation to his B, who tells Dan to move back home, since the gang won’t be able to find him, packs up a few things and books a thousand dollar last minute red eye to the US. Who tells Dan to get a new phone after he leaves, and that he’ll call him at his mom’s house the moment he can. Who hugs his B goodbye at the airport with almost nothing to his name but a rucksack with some clothes and a little bit of food, and his cell phone. Who boards a plane terrified he’ll never see Dan again. 

Gav who’s only 18 years old and terrified for his life. Who spends almost a month on the streets of Los Santos, cold and hungry and terrified, who gets picked up on night by this brilliant woman who looks like a TV mom and calls herself Jack. Who’s already half-dead when they get back to the small apartment she shared with her then-boyfriend, who gets fed up and set up in a soft warm bed. Gavin Free who’s Jack’s first lost boy. Who starts to build up strength again within a few weeks, who starts trying to build his skills back up, get his hacking online again, get his body back to the condition it was in when he was doing gymnastics regularly, who proves himself to Geoff AND Jack on his first heist with them when he leaps from a third floor window of the building and catches himself on the bar of an opposite balcony with a sack of jewels tied to his belt. Who finally feels okay working with a gang, because Jack and Geoff take care of him like parents should. 

Gav who tries to welcome all the other boys as they come, who immediately befriends Michael, calling him his Boi, helping him to cut his hair so that it stops sticking up everywhere after Michael botched cutting it when he left home, who plays X-Box with Ray to keep him engaged with the group while he gets to know them, who leaves little gifts of succulents and cactuses outside Ryan’s bedroom door once the crew fully integrates with him, who thinks Jeremy’s so cute he can hardly keep his eyes off of him, who does little things to try and make him feel welcome, as well as drop hints that he’s got a bit of a crush without making him uncomfortable or nervous, who has his own special relationships with everyone in the crew, even when he gets really annoying, who secures a date with Jeremy, followed by another and another until they officially come out with it to the crew when Jack walks in on the two of them asleep, curled together in Gav’s bed, looking for all the world like they’d been together for years (Jack fondly remembers thinking they looked a lot like her and Geoff when they were first together). Who has Dan come by and visit and hang out with the Crew at least four or five times a year, because he can’t forget his B, his first protector and his first real friend, and the crew accepts and loves Dan because he’s Gav’s B, because there’s no judgement of pasts or outside friends in the Fakes’ penthouse.

Gavin who spent so much of his life hiding who he was, finally finding a place, and people, where it was okay to be exactly as he was.