because those commercials are the best

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Art School | Sophie Roach (Austin, TX)

Drawing and painting her way through an imaginative landscape of intricate and visual entanglements is Austin native, Sophie Roach.  Her artwork has endlessly covered  surfaces from– guitars, beer cans, Vans, to entire rooms.  And if that isn’t already insanely rad, her organic approach and laid back attitude make her not only incredibly humble, but also a super awesome collaborator.  While finishing up one mural and starting up new projects, we had the chance to ask Sophie a few questions about her art, her career, and her approach – from finding her voice, attacking a mural, to digging the quietude one might find as a mail person hah!  

Photographs courtesy of the artist. 

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anonymous asked:

Massive fan of your fics. Any chance of sanvers one proposing to the other. Love from not sunny at all cos it always rains Scotland

Thank you! Are you as big a fan of my fics as I am of the rain in Scotland? I loved the rain there! Granted, I was there in June/July though.


Alex has been the instigator of a lot of their most important moments. She was the one brave enough to come out, and to kiss Maggie first, even if Maggie wasn’t ready. Alex was the one who tried to say “I love you,” and Maggie wouldn’t let her. When she was safe and sound, Maggie waited until Alex said it first, she wanted to make sure that Alex really meant it, that she wasn’t just saying it to make Maggie feel better about “having loved and lost.” Alex is the one that sneaks her key onto Maggie’s ring, who does Maggie’s laundry at her place so she doesn’t have to leave, until Maggie goes home one night and realizes the only clothes she has there are three orphaned socks and her period panties.

Alex has been responsible for a lot of their major milestones.

Sure, Maggie has had the speeches. “We should kiss the girls we want to kiss.” “It’s not gonna end, not for a long time.”

But Alex has the actions.

And two years and three months in, Maggie thinks maybe it’s time that she make the important move.

Because they’d discussed it, before, like responsible adults. Kind of. They’d discussed Maggie’s fear of committment, her feelings of worthlessness, her tendency to torpedo her relationships and how much it scared her that she would do that to them- to Alex- the way she had to Emily. They had a very adult conversation about boundaries and taking things slow and not running away.

At least until Maggie got tired of talking about feelings and started taking her clothes off.

But that was months ago, and sometimes Alex would sigh a little at those stupid heteronormative ring commercials. And Maggie was pretty sure that Zillow and Realtor.com were bookmarked on Alex’s computer at work, because sometimes email alerts on Alex’s phone would pop up while Alex was in the bathroom, and Maggie knew those addresses, knew they were all in neighborhoods with good schools and parks.

She couldn’t bring Kara ring shopping; as much as she’d like to involve Little Danvers, she’d also like to surprise Alex. Winn was out for similar reasons. Neither of them could keep a secret at the best of times, both would probably spontaneously word vomit the next time they saw Alex if she tried to involve them.

She briefly thought about J’onn, but he’s psychic, and every time Maggie thinks about a ring on Alex’s finger, she starts thinking about Alex in nothing but the ring, so he’s out.

James it is.

Except James has all these ideas for classically beautiful rings with big stones and intricate metalwork, which while all beautiful, none of them screamed “Alex.”

She was taking notes on a robbery involving suspected alien weaponry when she spotted it at a pawn shop. It took her another week to close the case before she could come back and see if it was still there. It was.

A thicker band, with the stones inset, meant that Alex might be able to wear it to work, if she wanted to. None of the stones were loose, even the bigger diamond in the center was locked down tight. It was too big for Maggie’s finger, but the sizing guide Mr. Montenegro had said it would fit Alex. It was gorgeous, but simple, just like she thought Alex would prefer. And it might even come in handy the next time her girl needed to punch someone.

Matteo gives her 30% off the asking price because she wasn’t an asshole while investigating the robbery.

It takes another three months before she actually gets the chance to propose. Not that she was planning something big and elaborate- that was a Valentine’s Day tradition and out of the norm. Not to say Alex didn’t deserve it, she did, but they were usually much more Netflix and chill than 5-Star starving and opera. Maggie did, though, want to clear the air with Eliza, warn her it was coming and get warning herself if she thought Eliza was going to cause trouble for Alex.

She was pleasantly surprised at Eliza’s excitement, though she wished that the first comment out of the older woman’s mouth hadn’t been, “Oh, Maggie, this is amazing, I was thinking she’d never get married, I almost forgot it was legal now.”

Maggie might actually punch her future mother-in-law in the face if she says that to Alex.

In the end though, she planned a nice dinner at home and a hetero trope of the ring in a cupcake, since Alex wasn’t Kara and actually ate them with a fork instead of shoving them into her mouth whole and risking death by confectionery treat.

That plan was, of course, derailed by an ill-timed standoff at a bank and Kara’s breakup necessitating a sister night. The next three plans were similarly thrown off by a hellgrammite, Winn’s breakup, and Vasquez’s baby announcement.

Which is why the next time they curled up on the couch, Maggie forewent all the speeches. She pulled the little box from between the cushions while Alex was focused on the Netflix menu, flicked it open, and waited for Alex to turn back, like she always did, to check for Maggie’s opinion.

When she did, her eyes went as wide as they day Maggie accused her of angling for a date. Those beautiful, expressive brown eyes flicked back and forth between Maggie and the ring and she didn’t say a word.

Maggie cleared her throat. “Well, what do you say, Danvers? Ride or die?”

She probably should have left the window open, considering how hard it was to get someone to fix it at 10pm on a Friday, especially when you couldn’t admit that it was shattered when Supergirl heard her sister accept Maggie’s proposal.

anonymous asked:

Ratings say otherwise. My abusive brownface, blackface, lesbian queen really did THAT.

Anyway….you don’t know how to read ratings, but what can one expect from a racist like you? Let me help you understand:

1st: The 100 has been dropping in ratings since Season 1:

Season 1 had an average viewership of a .6 with 1.85 million viewers

Season 2 had an average viewership of a .52 with 1.54 million viewers (a loss of .33 million viewers)

Season 3 had an average viewership of a .48 with 1.33 million viewers (a loss of .21 million viewers)

Season 4 had an average viewership of a .34 with 955,000 viewers (a loss of .37 million viewers)

which is essentially…not that far from the average loss of viewership the show experiences every Season. 

On to more damning evidence that counteracts your claim:

Every single last CW show lost viewers this Season:

Arrow

The fourth season of Arrow averaged a 0.94 rating with 2.49 million total viewers.

The fifth season of Arrow averaged a .62 with 1.755 million total viewers (a loss of .735 million viewers)

Supergirl (where most of the Cl/xa’s hopped over to):

The first season of Supergirl on CBS averaged a 1.68 rating with 7.68 million total viewers. 

The second season of Supergirl on The CW averaged a .73 with 2.356 million total viewers (a loss of 5.324 million viewers). Look at y’all go, I guess?

The Flash:

The second season of The Flash averaged a 1.37 rating with 3.53 million total viewers.

The third season of The Flash averaged a 1.06 rating with 1.755 million total viewers (a loss of 1.755 million viewers). 

Legends of Tomorrow:

The first season of DC’s Legends of Tomorrow  averaged a 0.80 rating with 2.17 million total viewers . 

The second season of DC’s Legends of Tomorrow averaged a .64 rating with 1.810 million total viewers (a loss of .36 million viewers). 

And so on and so forth. So…was L/xa on all of these shows? Or….did the CW just have a hard Season. 

2nd: It’s also important to note that these ratings that are easily accessible to us? They’re Live and Same Day (SD). That’s not where the money is! Networks get paid for C+3 ratings which includes DVR viewing within three days of the original airing when commercials are watched (which is why it’s important to suffer through commercials guys!). The press does not usually have access to those numbers. 

But what we do have access to are the +7 numbers (although not for the entirety of S4 just yet, and those numbers tell us that The 100 essentially doubles it’s viewership over the course of a week. 

3rd: Of all of The CW’s fall shows (save JTV which has always been a “low” performer and so is not on this list), The 100 was actually the 2nd best performing because it had the 2nd lowest rate of viewership decline (coming in only after Legends of Tomorrow and by a small fraction at that). Even if you disregard those facts, it is the networks 4th highest grossing show (because Arrow and Flash tie at 2nd). 

So basically….I’m not surprised that someone of your ilk doesn’t possess basic reading comprehension skills or the ability to do simple addition and subtraction. 

And to be honest? Y’all can keep that brownface bindi wearing white Savior cause I surely don’t want her ass. 

the best analogy for living with ADHD is like your brain is a computer, and people without ADHD they’re brains have like a maximum of 3 tabs open on the internet at once. They’re focused, they’re able to find stuff easily.
But for a person with ADHD it’s like there’s 100 tabs open and like 5 of those are in Internet Explorer of all things. Five of those tabs are playing music or a commercial and all the sound is clashing but you can’t figure out which ones they are because the lil tab things are so small you don’t know what each tab is. Some of them are just websites that don’t use a lot of energy and stuff, some of them are things like tumblr that with like 100 other things open can’t function well, you have a video game opened and also an unfinished drawing in Photoshop, somebody is trying to Skype you, and you’re trying to do all these things at once even though as good of a multitasker as you are, you can’t do this much! And there’s like tons of tabs you don’t need any more and you should’ve closed, but you didn’t because you forgot and now they’re just using more power and after you get to a certain point your computer is going to just crash.

That Last Minute Present Tho

Merry Christmas, Happy Holidays, or just an all around Hope-You’re-Having-A-Good-Day to you all, religion and beliefs besides! I want you all to know on this cold December night that I love you all and wish I could have mailed myself to all your houses so I could be there under your tree, or just in your living room in general. And eat all your food. I am a beast of perpetual indulgence, what can I say? 

Ling and I felt bad that we’ve both been so swamped this holiday season, so I’m pulling through at roughly 10:31 PM Pacific time to give you all a late as hell gift.

Enjoy!

Here are some of my favorite headcanons I have for each of the Overwatch babs. BEWARE. This post is huge. I apologize. 

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SHER: - Let’s Take a Selfie! - 
Markers, pens and pencils on mix media bond (new window for hi-res)

Stupidest Name I’ve ever coce up with because I dislike the word selfie but what else could I call it? Ugh. So it’s been awhile since I’ve posted anything new up here for obvious reasons, so I thought I’d indulge y'all with a little something I did during all my free time for the past 3 weeks :) Thought I would upload it today for justjohnlockstuff ’s valentine’s day challenge, only then realizing after I uploaded it and went to go get the submission rules that the pic had to be Valentine themed… UGGGGGHHH I need to learn to read. They’ve a pink phone and they’re of the cutest OTP ever, does that count? Feh. If it’s not eligible, that’s okay :) 

Anyway, so I doodled this up with no intention of doing more to this than just John and Sherlock, but then my computer crash happened, and then I decided what the hell, let’s go nuts on this so I dug around the google for pics from parks in and around London, and found a lovely pic of Regent’s Park, or at least I hope it is… at least all the researching I did said that there is a fountain at Regent’s Park, so please bear with me for I am an ignorant Canadian girl.

UGH, is all I can say about how long this actually took. I love it when I get ambitious and decide to do full detailed backgrounds… with pencils, no less… been a long time since I did pencil work. I’m actually REALLY proud of it except for the white gel pen in the fountain there… I’ll just leave you to what I keep seeing every time I look at this, lol. This is about… 15 hours’ work? Maybe? because I get really picky about colouring. LOL.

Really happy with this pic. You can take it however you want, just know that I’m a Johnlocker, so… wee. 

My sort-of-valentine’s day pic for this year? Yeah… I dislike v-day, it’s commercial bullcrap. I do, however, like drawing my current fave otps, this year being Johnlock.

So, not really a fanart friday pic, but it’s fanart, and it’s friday, so… soft restart of FF again, I guess. Happy Valentine’s / Single’s Awareness Day all. May you get to spend it with those you love, be it your best friends, family, or significant other, because that’s what it SHOULD be about :) <3

RIP Harris Wittels. 1984-2015.

There are so few people that you meet in life that give you that feeling that you’ve found a real unique, original person. Harris Wittels was one of those and we lost him yesterday. He was 30 years old. I’ve been devastated. 

I’m still waiting for the other phone call to let me know that Harris is okay and this was all a horrible misunderstanding. I don’t know when my brain is going to be able to process the terrible feeling that fills my heart with dread and my eyes with tears every 20 seconds when I realize this very special person is really gone.

So, I wanted to write something to share my stories about Harris and what he meant to me.

I first knew Harris as a standup. I’d have him open shows quite a bit, and he was always fantastic. As his career as a writer took off, he got busy. He’d say that he didn’t have time or wasn’t working on standup at the time. Sadly, he had just started back working his standup, which made me thrilled as a fan. His standup, like he his real life personality, was open, honest (way more honest than how most people refer to “honest” in their standup) and hilarious.

As a writer, we worked on two films that never saw the light of day. The first was Olympic Sized Asshole. The premise was Danny McBride and I were two best friends who lived in SC who’s girlfriends had a three way with a super handsome star Olympic athlete (think Channing Tatum). We did a rough outline of it together and then Harris went off to write the script.

Around this time in my career, I was very puzzled by film scripts. None of the ones I read ever made me laugh. I figured that I must not know how to read scripts properly. Maybe these things were funnier in person than on the page.

Then I got Harris’ first draft of Olympic.

Every page had a huge laugh. I couldn’t believe it. Jody Hill and I called each other and were just rolling about our favorite jokes.

I was DYING.

Here’s a little chunk I found looking through old notes. The script was just full of great jokes like this:

Another bit I loved was when Danny’s character and my character pitch a business idea in the beginning of the movie. 

There was also a part that would be played by Paul Giamatti. I think this was something he just added as a last minute addition that wasn’t even in the outline.

Eventually the project faded away as many movie projects tend to do.

But, after that, any time I worked on anything, I insisted that Harris Wittels be one of the writers. He was the first name I asked for every time. When I worked on the MTV Movie Awards. Those Randy videos for Funny People. Anytime I did a dumb commercial. Any time I needed to get joke writers, I always asked for Harris to help because he was truly the best of the best. And I was so lucky that he always said yes.

Most jokes when read by “comedy people” don’t get a laugh per se. You just read it and go, “Oh that’s funny” and you understand it would get a laugh. You eventually just know how jokes are constructed and you aren’t as easily surprised. Harris was part of that rare breed where you wouldn’t see his shit coming. His jokes were so weird, unexpected, often brilliantly dumb that they were in that ultra-exclusive club of ones that made comedy people laugh — and laugh hard. This was why Harris was such a go-to for everyone. Anyone that was ever in a writers room with him knew he was probably the funniest comedy writer out there. He was just a machine.

Remember the Obama-Galifianakis Funny or Die video?

Galifianakis: So are you gonna run a third time?

Obama: I don’t think that’d be a very good idea. That’d be like making a third Hangover movie.

I thought that was by far the best joke in that thing and maybe any thing I watched last year. I found out today that it was a Wittels original. Of course. 

Harris was also known as “the chuffah king.” Chuffah is the random nonsense characters in a scene talk about before getting to the meat of it that leads to story. Here’s one of the best chuffah moments from Parks from the “Hunting Season” episode:

Tom: Your favorite kind of cake can’t be birthday cake, that’s like saying your favorite kind of cereal is breakfast cereal.

Donna: I love breakfast cereal.

Harris excelled at coming up with hilarious, random nonsense like this. It was a tool that no one else seemed to have. I’m not a big podcast listener, but today I found out this was also kind of the fuel for Harris Foam Corner (or Phone Corner) from Comedy Bang Bang podcast, here’s a playlist that is filled with this kind of hilarious/awful nonsense from Harris: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLBB4729D88A16451A

Here’s some highlights I found on Tumblr today:

“One time I said to a guy that, ‘I loved learning new things. I’m a bit of an infomaniac.’ And he thought I said NYMPHOMANIAC….so he fucked me. And I said ‘No, no no…I said INFO. I’m an INFOmaniac’ And he said ‘Well, here’s some info…you just got fucked. Clean yourself up.’”

“I hate smoking sections. Unless it’s Jim Carrey’s The Mask. Then the smoking section is my favorite part!”

“I’m not getting married until gay people can get married. Because I’m gay.”

Imagine being around a guy who was this uniquely silly all the damn time. That’s what it was like being in a writers room with Harris. It was just bullshit like this non-stop. And it was the best.


After we failed to get Olympic off the ground, we had another idea called BIG TIME. This was about myself and another guy becoming super famous after a video of us saving a bunch of little black kids from a burning fire went viral. Again the plan was that Harris and I would draft a story (this time with our friend Jason Woliner) and then Harris would bang out the script.

One of my favorite Harris stories was before writing this script we’d pitch the story to studios. In one part of the pitch, we had a bit where the two leads became quasi-famous and started attending B-level celeb parties. In describing this scene in our practice session, Harris would say, “Guys like Chris Pontius would be there.” I’d say, “Alright Harris, none of these execs know who Chris Pontius from Jackass is, don’t say that.”

At that point, he knew he had me. Every pitch, and keep in mind these are important pitches with studio heads, etc. - I would lead and then as soon as I got to that scene, he would throw it in with glee, “you know, guys like Pontius would be there.” He even dropped the Chris and was just saying Pontius. Last name only. Jason and I were dying. 

Then, in an even more absurd move, he added a second part to this bit. During the pitch, he started saying,  "then the guys get famous and they do all the talk shows Letterman… Conan… Pontius Tonight…” To be clear, Pontius Tonight is a fictional show hosted by Chris Pontius that he made up just to make me laugh/fume. He said that execs would assume this was a real thing as to not seem out of touch. It was great. Harris would rather make all of us laugh than worry about jeopardizing these meetings.

He really seemed to relish getting laughs out of other comedians. Last night, the Parks writers staff and other friends shared Harris stories. One of my favorites was there was a serious email from NBC about a big sexual harassment seminar. Serious execs are CC’d along with Harris and the writers. Harris writes back, REPLY ALL, with this gem — now keep in mind EVERYONE is on this email, all the crew, so many higher level producers and execs, here we go:


As both our movies fizzled, Harris and I worked together on Parks and Rec. I was so thrilled when he got hired to be a writer and the episodes where he was on set were ones I looked forward to. A writer on set would pitch alternate jokes and help you if you didn’t feel a scene didn’t work, who better than Harris in that situation. Talking to other writers on the show today, it was clear Harris’ contribution to the world of Pawnee was immense. I’m sure he wrote many of the lines that made you laugh throughout the show.

Harris also eventually acted in the show as one of the animal control guys. Go on YouTube and watch this compilation, he is so hilarious in it:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Xkplbd_nQFs


I also want to say, besides being so unbelievably hilarious, Harris was truly a sweet guy. He was so lovable even when saying the most disgusting things. You just couldn’t help but love him. He had the most ridiculous opinions on everything from food to dating to music and he’d defend them to no end. He loved to make ridiculous boast that he insisted he could achieve. Here are a few that I compiled:

- Do as good a job as Trent Reznor scoring “The Social Network”
- Play against the Lakers and juke NBA point guard Steve Blake
- Hit an NBA 3-pointer
- Play right field in a Major League Baseball game, and catch a pop-up, and easily throw it back to the infield
- Act as well as any actor
- Every girl has, at minimum, a 20% crush on him

He was once adamant that he could taste the difference between all the major water bottle brands - and he did! He also once claimed he could beat anyone in the entire Parks offices at arm wrestling. Mike Schur gleefully egged him on: “Really, Harris? Anyone?” Harris said, “Yeah.” Then Mike beckoned John Valerio — a giant, muscular man with enormous arms – who worked in the editing department. Harris: “Shit! I forgot about Valerio. Come on, man!” Nevertheless, Harris went through with the match, put up a good fight, and was extremely gracious in defeat.

He was also kind of an odd ladies man in a way. Not blessed with a tall stature and traditional handsome guy stuff, he was able to transcend it all by being charming in an adorable/silly way. He was a romantic at heart. He once had a really big date. Someone way out of his league. His move - show up with a box of Russell Stovers chocolates. You know, the brand of chocolates of you get when you really want to impress a girl. He also once sent an e-vite to a girl’s heart. She declined. He once proposed to a woman on G-Chat. Genuinely.

Here’s some other random things I loved about him: He loved 311 and knew that the bassist’s name was P-Nut. He once had dinner with my parents and I in New York at a fancy restaurant and showed up in a suit that was 5 sizes too big. He looked like a kid dressing up in his dad’s clothes. Afterwards he turned to me and said, “Hey man, can you help me get a suit that fits?” His Tinder profile said, “I make money. I’ll buy you a couch.” We asked him why and he said, “Girls love couches.” He would always order the most unabashedly unhealthy, grossest thing at lunch. The most legendary being a burger he once ordered at Parks that had fried egg, bacon, avocado, onion rings (these are ON the burger FYI), BBQ sauce, and monterey jack cheese. He would take 4 things of mozzarella string cheese, line ‘em up, and melt it in the microwave. And then he’d eat this with a fork for a snack. I would always try to order healthy. Once I suggested a vegetarian place. After the email went out, I got a text from him “Guys this vegan place is an atrocity. Please reconsider.” He once left the writers office for lunch to eat at his house and texted my brother Aniz that he was “making Chili’s leftovers at home.” It really made me laugh that he chose the word “making” to describe heating up disgusting leftovers. He loved Chili’s but could never get anyone to join him. He would often go on solo missions. He once went to Chili’s by himself in Encino and Joe Mande asked him why Encino and not the closer one in Inglewood. He said, “The good one’s in Encino, you gotta go out to Encino.”

Weirdly, besides Parks, a lot of the stuff we worked on together never made it out into the world.

Another harsh part of this tragedy is that was all about to change.  Around the time Parks was ending, I started developing a new project with my friend Alan Yang, another writer on Parks. Immediately, we knew we wanted Harris to help us write it. We were lucky to get him on board and for the past 5 months or so, he’s been an integral part of this new project. He worked tirelessly and was a leader on our staff and we were all thrilled to be doing this thing that was actually going forward.

We knew Harris had issues with addiction but things were pointing in the right direction. He was getting treatment and focused on his career and the opportunities ahead. It all seemed to point in the right direction. We were all about to move to New York together in March to have great fun and make great work. He was excited. I was excited. It all seemed perfect. He just found an apartment on Monday.

Then, I got the most horrific phone call yesterday. I couldn’t comprehend it.

This week I spent a lot of time with Harris. On Monday he drove me to a dinner we were having. His iPod was on shuffle and every fucking song was a different Phish bootleg. I kept forcing him to skip until it was Phish maybe covering another more tolerable band’s song. Then we hit a band called Pralines and Dick. I told him this was particularly bad. He let me know it was his high school jam band and warned me about the upcoming 5 minute funk breakdown. I couldn’t help but enjoy it.  

I was so excited for what was ahead for Harris. I knew he was going to really explode after this new project. The little bit of Wittels comedy out there was just the tip of the tip of the iceberg. He had so much more to give and I was so excited for him. He seemed to be turning things around. He me asked for help finding a nutritionist. He said he knew nothing about nutrition. I informed him that I could confirm Chili’s is pretty bad for you. He even reluctantly ordered the “vegan bowl” for lunch the day before he passed when we were all writing together.

My last memory of him was from that day.

We were punching up a script. In punch up, you’re just trying to beat jokes that maybe aren’t landing. Everyone contributes and tries to beat the joke and you leave the best one in. But for us, what would happen is basically, all the writers would pitch something, then Harris would chime in with something so bizarre and hilarious, it would either make it in, or make us laugh and we’d agree it was the most hilarious, but probably too crazy. That last day, I remember I hit a line and we needed a better joke, I was exhausted. I turned to Harris and just wanted him to fix it so we could move on. I yelled “Harris! I need you, get off your phone. Make this joke better, fix it please.” And, of course, he did.

Bye Harris. I miss you and I’m glad I got to enjoy your genuinely amazing and original presence. I wish I got to you know even more. I hope people reading this realize what a incredibly unique man you were, and what brutal a loss it is for those who knew you and also for those who never had the pleasure. This has been so hard to write because I just keep wanting to add more and more stories and more jokes and more everything, but I’d never be able to finish it. You are far too special to sum up in any kind of piece like this. You were one of the best and we all will miss you.

Love,

Aziz

The Secret Life of Ahsha - Intro

“ Those flowers here…it doesn’t look good “
Ahsha was preferring the last details of each of her events herself. The ballroom was exactly how she pictured it , even better but those flowers…they really needed to move. It was because of such perfectionist details and care that Ahsha was the best at what she was doing. The gala will start at 9pm, not a minute late and it was her responsability to make sure it happen, without incident. But with years in the business, Ahsha knew that she wasn’t safe from perturbation. Rule number one, the event was a success only at the end of it , when every guest was left. Tonight was a big night, really important for her company. Not that she need any commercial, but since she was having the biggest contract in the city. She looked at her watch , seeing the hours and not the dream team of chef.
” Where is the caterer ?“ She said , at loud and her employee looked at her
” They are stuck in trafic “ answered Violette
The boss rolled her eyes, LA will definitely be the dead of her. It was just impossible to move in this damn city. She wasn’t panicking thought, she was dealing with this caterer since her debut, they never fail her, will probably not start tonight. Ahsha stayed supervising the decoration, the organization, making the gift package herself since Nancy was feeling sick. When she arrived to a satisfying result Ahsha decided to leave. She reached the parking lot . She pressed the button of her Bentley, It was one if her guilty pleasure. It was really not unpleasant to reach higher speed in couple second. She was loving the sensation of rolling in one of those, and the best was when she was getting out of her car,  the men look stayed on her, astonished that it was a woman behind the wheel of such a luxurious car. Life was being good for Ahsha. She was working hard and enough to afford herself the kind of life style she was having, enough to feed her guilty pleasure. Not that she was materialist, but she was having a taste for expensive things. Such as cars, shoes, bags… Not every women could say they can have whatever they wanted. Ahsha wasn’t one of those. Even if she didn’t had always been rich . It was precisely for this reason that she was still being down on earth. She parked right in front if her favorite boutique , her friend already in front. Marissa. The two ladies were friend since so long that they couldn’t even remember how they meet. Which isn’t unusual when it was in gardening . Some photos were showing them together, as babies. Right now, they were like sister, with a really tight bond. They never had a real fight, always stupid argue but it wasn’t lasting more than three days. Marissa was a part of Ahsha’s live since longer than her husband and son. They knew each other by heart, better than sister, they were twins, sometime just one person. It was no surprise that Marissa knew every Ahsha’s secret…
” Giiiiiiiiiiiiirl “ said Marissa accent.  It was their weekly shopping date and both couldn’t wait this moment of the week they will have. It was fun guarantee. Ahsha smiled , it was surprising how Marissa was always putting her in an extra good mood.
” Mariiiiiiiiiiiiiiissa “ she sang, mocking at her sis. Was she surprised to see her ? It was nothing like go shop with your girl. Ahsha just ran in her arms , hugging her friend. It was a ritual between them now, anytime they were seeing each other. Wasting no more time on the side walk, they penetrated in the store. The seller knew them by heart too
” Ahsha , Marissa!“ She said. They were also friend with everyone in this store . It was just like a second home for her. Someone brought them some orange juice in champagne glass, the true stereotype of luxury shopping. Another guilty pleasure was her endless collection of shoes. She saw some high heels, probably from the new collection she was already seeing them at her feet. With her confidence and assurance, her tiny and curvy body, her independance , Ahsha was having everything of the femme fatale. Men were stop walking to look at her when she was around. Women were swearing as her sex appeal touched them too. On high heels, no one was sexier. She asked for her size and indeed they were from the new collection seeing the price. Was it bother her to buy some shoes to a higher price of some salary. Not at all. When the seller came back with her size , Ahsha tried them. They were just gorgeous , making her a beautiful legs. It will be just criminal to not take them . She looked at her reflection in the mirrors, wondering if she will want to take them in different colors. The answer will definitely yes
” Are you gonna wear them tonight ? “ Marissa asked ” They will be perfect with your dress” Not only she was the event planner but she was also a guest. Thanks to her husband. The gala was organized by his company. All of his business partners, co worker, boss will be there. Like the perfect spouse, Ahsha needed to look just perfect. And she was always. She didn’t need to put an extra effort
“ No, I will wear my Savage Jimmy Choo” answered Ahsha. With no specific enthusiast. Of course Marissa didn’t miss it, not a bite of it
“ Someone look excited to have a night with her man ” Marissa sarcasstically spoke. Such of fancy nights might impressed some young girl, but not Ahsha. After 6 years of marriage, she was used to those night her and her husband were invited to. It was having nothing of romantic or even exciting. It was fill of meeting people you rarely speak, show off and expose your wife, then everyone was leaving after boring hours. Ahsha had been glad to skip some of those when she was pregnant of her son
“ Him and I are doing this since a while Marissa , you know how I don’t like to be the trophy at his arm" She couldn’t deny it, even if it never been her husband intention. Him…was actually real nice and gentleman. Faithful. Loyal. Honest. Kind and generous. A lot of women will be content to have such a husband. And Ahsha wasn’t ungrateful. Not at all… After more  hours with her girl, Ahsha went back to her car. With all her bags and boxes she charged on the back seats, it took her a little time. She drive among the street of LA. The sunny and fresh weather of the city was why a lot was moving in the there. She reached her residence who wasn’t that exceptional for a rich. A choice of the man she decided to marry. Anytime she was approaching , her ring became heavier. Ahsha was feeling being a wife only between those walls. In the drive way , His BMW SUV, letting her know he was home already. She escaped from her car and went back home. With no surprise, Lana , their baby sitter was in the living room, playing with her baby boy. Him…was the true man of her life . He was making her heart melt and was bringing so much joy.
” Hey Idriss guess who is here “ sang the baby sitter ” Mommy is here !“ He was just four months, but Ahsha was feeling like it was yesterday she gave birth to her son. Her pregnancy had been one of the most blossoming experience in her life from those past few years. She developed a really tight bond and was happy to be a mother. She let her bags fell on the flooring as she came to take her infant in her arms. He was warmth , like always. Ahsha couldn’t be sure which capacity he was having but she notice a certain face he was doing when he was seeing her after a day away. She kissed him on his forehead , holding tight against her chest. Touching him was one of this free pleasure she was praying the most to have
” Does everything was ok today ?“ Asked Ahsha, to Lana
” Of course “ the girl smiled ” You know this is a good boy that you have “
What Ahsha was loving with Lana is that she was truly invested in her job. She was taking care of her son like it was her own. We could tell she was loving what she was doing and was valuing interaction with babies. In her side, Lana wasn’t bother to work for the family with good advantage such as a good salary and three days off since the father wasn’t working on the wednesday. Sophie, her substitute will be there in a minute. Ahsha couldn’t spend so much time with her son since she was having the gala. Sophie was this new student they were calling as baby sitter anytime they needed to go out. And those night out was rarely date between husband and wife. Ahsha gave her baby back to the baby sitter to go prepare herself she mount the stairs , going in the master bedroom, the one she was sharing with her husband. Seeing her, he welcomed her with a large smile. It was no way he didn’t missed her
” Hey babe !“ He said, waiting she is coming farther in their room. He was just coming out of the shower since he was just wearing his towel… The man was barely dry because Ahsha could see some drop of water all over his chest.. That was one of the reason why she married him. Not the most important but definitely on the list. His weekly hours of workout was in front of her , shirtless and all appetising. She came closer to him. He slowly grabbed her small waist and dropped a peck on her cheek. That…was the reason why Ahsha tend to forget her rings as soon she passed the door . He done nothing else, just this really shy and small kiss before go back to his preparation
” How was your day ?“ He asked her . Ahsha tight up her hair in a messy pony tail. She was herself getting ready to have a quick shower before put her gala dress. While she strip in front of him , it doesn’t even attract his look. But it made a long time ago Ahsha wasn’t looking after her husband look. He was like never laying eyes on her. That she was dressed up , or the completely the opposite on a light outfit.
” Fine “ she answered going in the bathroom . She didn’t even ask him the same since she knew exactly , word by word what he will say. Even his days were boring. He always had been a hard worker, with a certain talent and an attractive arrogance. He was a catch that mostly women wanted. Under the shower, Ahsha realize how much she didn’t want to go out that night. She was having a strong feeling… even in front of her mirror when she was almost ready , adding her last touch of jewelry, earring that her dear husband offered her , she was feeling like boring already. Her man appears behind her, ready in his tux. He was hella sexy , like always. His physic perfection was almost scaring
” I thought that maybe we can arrange the messy room to make a play room for Idriss" he told her. When they moved into this house, couple of their stuff they didn’t know where to put, they just kept them all together in a room. It was filled of boxes and old stuff. But this area could be perfect to install a play room, dedicated to the play of their son. He was a good father, attentive and very present. Ahsha was almost sure that the first time he fell in love it was with their son. He was telling her that he love her, but only for big occasion. Right now he was planning their week end with cleaning, and make something for their progeny while they could have done something more intimate, for their couple.
“ Sure” Ahsha replied, without even look at him
“ We’ll do that" He kissed her hair and just let her finish her make up.

The Gala was exactly how she expected it , from both of her way to be there. The service was on top , the music low enough , the food delicious and nothing of the decoration fell on any heads. As for being a guest , she was holding tight her man’s arms, while he was strolling her from there to here , meeting new people, some old people. During those fancy night and clueless conversation , the wife felt like having her head under water and running out of breath. All those debate were just boring, all those gossip pointless and sometime mean. Her own husband wasn’t liking these night but he was so used to respect rule and obligation that he couldn’t turn away the invitation. They were both walking to their table and it wasn’t with regrets. Ahsha’s feet became heavier in her shoes. But it was without count on someone else
“ Ahsha!! Ahsha!!!” yelled a familiar voice. Ahsha didn’t need turn around to know who was it. But unlike what she is about to face , the woman Ahsha was familiar with wasn’t the one standing today. Estelle Lazio , like in the Lazio Restaurants , the best group of Italien caterer. Her husband…in a sort of way , Ahsha knew him too. The two couple were acquaintance, nothing close. The two real friend were the husband , many time Mr Lazio was parter with Ahsha’s husband company.
“ Hey Vincent” he said , shaking his friend hands. Ahsha wasn’t surprised how polite her husband was. He was such a nice man .
“ Ahsha I can’t believe you had a baby four months ago! There is no way that body gave birth ” cried out Estelle. Ahsha fake to laugh, but she was enjoying that at least someone did acknowledge her effort. After she gave birth , Ahsha tried her best to get back to her shape. Also for her husband, she wanted to keep being attractive. With months of sex strike, going back on the field , she wanted it to be good. But it didn’t change anything to her sex life. Just satisfying enough. Her own husband doesn’t seems to look at her while Vincent Lazio was having no problem. The way he was attract to Ahsha’s sensuality wasn’t even hiden. Yet , not a ounce of jealousy in the husband. Maybe if he knew how Ahsha was linked to the couple , maybe he will be a lot more jealous
“ I can’t guarantee you that Idriss definitely came out of me ” teased Ahsha mocking. Her husband surround her waist , bringing her closer to his large and muscular chest.
“ I have an amazing wife ” he said , kissing Ahsha’s cheek , his favorite spot on her “ who gave me an amazing son ”
See ? Why wouldn’t she be happy with a man who doesn’t fear to compliment her , in public , felling bless to have her by his side

The way back home was silente, as always. She was tired and couldn’t wait  to have all of her mask off and go to bed.  When someone doesn’t talk to you, you’re not interest of engage a conversation either. It was the life story of Ahsha. He was right there, behind the wheel and yet wasn’t giving a word to his wife. The only warmth face she was facing was her night baby sitter. Of course the young student was happy to go home. The married couple mount on the floor up but speared. Her husband went to check on their son, sleeping peacefully. The spouse went to her bedroom. Removing this dress and make up felt great. She was watching her face when she heard her husband walked in. He approached close to her and kissed her shoulder
“ You was incredible beautiful tonight ” he whispered her. Does it even make her heart beat faster or make her sweaty ? Not even a little bit.
“ Thank you. I will go check on Idriss ”
Ahsha left. Not that she was running away from her husband but she wanted to see the man of her life one last time for the day. When she discovered she was pregnant , Ahsha remembered how excited and happy she had been. The pregnancy had been fantastic and a great experience. Seeing her baby sleep was reassuring her. She did good. She was having a job . Was spending time for herself. Was married to a good man. Was the mother of the sweetest baby boy. But when the sun was down , for Ahsha it was just the end of the day , not the perspective of a better day for the future. She stayed a little moment in her son’s bedroom He wasn’t even doing her anything but he was the person giving her the more attention under this roof. Maybe when she will back , Idriss father will be asleep. Like most of time. Her little nightie wasn’t ideal to stay out of the sheet. She slowly opened the door and came in. He was lay down , on his back , wild awake. Ahsha came closer , mount on the bed. It was just mechanical. Nothing she wasn’t doing every night. She just leaned over him and dropped a small peck on his lips, before turned around on her side. She rested both of her hands against her head, and the pillow, closing her eyes. All she needed to do now was to wait the sleep. During the gala , she thought being tired but now that she was lay down, in her bed, she wasn’t tired at all. Just bored. Something surprising happened. She felt a breath on her neck and soon a body against her back. Some lips closed behind her neck in small kisses. His hand was now on her thigh , caressing the flesh of her. Ahsha opened her eyes , wondering what was happening. It was highly unexpected. Was he….?
“ It’s not Wednesday ” she whispered , in the dark
That was what was surprising. The married couple was so stuck in a routine , that they notice the time they were mostly having sex was the wednesday night. Not like they decided it and sign a paper but…they were having sex every wednesday night , and only this night of the week.
“ I know ” he replied “ But I thought that we could make an exception. You were so sexy tonight. Just don’t scream too loud to not wake up the baby” She turned around, facing him. Unfortunately she wasn’t turn on and the words he whispered in her ears have nothing sensual and sexy. But when she face his expression, him was looking at her with desire and envy for his wife.
“ Ok” she just said. She didn’t know if he will kiss her or… They were both uncomfortable, like teenager in their first relation while they were marred since years. It clearly felt like they didn’t know who must do the first step. Ahsha waited and her husband hesitated. He made his move thought. He came closer to his wife and pecked her lips. Like the usual kiss he was doing to her everytime. He seems really unexperimented and to be honest Ahsha was still not turn on. Not with a kiss that…innocente. Where was his hand on her body , like a little earlier when he was caressing her inner thighs ? Where was the sensation of his body against her ? Where was the dirty talk and a exploring tongue. For the woman , it feel like wait for the temperature to get heat.
The man itself was in another mood thought. He would never admit it but he expected this moment since the gala. More he was introducing his wife to his collegue and investor and more he admired his spouse beauty and he wanted to get intimate with her. He was already having different kind of image in the head, even if he wasn’t communicate them with Ahsha. He kissed her again and this time, he put his tongue in her mouth. Right the way , it speard a nice sensation in Ahsha. He was never doing this most of the time. But he quickly won some confident and dominance. He made the shoulder strap of her nightie slide , undressing her. If he was appearing like he wasn’t noticing her shape , now he was clearly aware of how hot his wife was. Just the first sight of Ahsha’s naked , made his hard on harder. She was simply a goddess
Unfortunately , their excitement weren’t at the same level. He was a bite clumsy and too much precaution. To have herself aroused, Ahsha need to think about hundred mile away from what was really happening. She needed to imagine a her husband completely throw and turn her on her back , came above her and fiercely penetrated her from behind. Letting his animalistic side take over hi and wildly dig into her. Instead…this happened
“ Can you lay down on your back ” he begged, in the dark, like a little boy. Ahsha said yes with her head and lay on her back , looking at the roof …waiting something happen .He took off his shirt and pants and then boxer before come between his wife’s tights. The rumors such as white men were less packed than black man….could neither be a stereotype or a fact , depend on the man. If someone would have say to Ahsha that she will marry a white men she wouldn’t believe it and yet her husband was white and his member was one of the multiple reason she married him. For him, it was a stereotype and now having his d*ck under her nose, she was not all wet and horny. He wasn’t the best at making the foreplay last , or making the temptation increase, having the sexual tension delectable but he was having a good d*ck , a good trust game , a good pace. As soon he penetrated her, Ahsha all body inflamed . It was feeling damn good. That amazing feeling of the intimacy share , of him getting in and out of her… Sex was having magical power.
For sure No one could imagine Ahsha’s surprise that not only her husband worked that night but several time. Making her cum 3 time ad even gave her an oral

Waking up this , Ahsha was like another woman. After the night of love she had , it was a breeze of fresh air she received. She couldn’t remember when was the last time he made love to her like this. And more than once… It was really pleasant. Never under esteem the power of sex on a woman. In fact she couldn’t wait to wake up and be with her husband. Rare was the day she was waking up with that feeling. Like they planned the day before, they will focus on empty the messy room to make a play room for their son. So far , it was going well. They were bringing back to their old memories , mostly about their first years together. Before get married and have a baby. In a box, Ahsha put all of the gift hemade her , like a portrait of her he draw for their second date
“ You remember this ? ” she asked, a huge smile on the face. Ahsha was prettier when she was happy. Her face was just lighten when she was smiling. Her brown eyes were so much more communicative. She gave him the little draw. Indeed, when he bring Ahsha for a ride , near to the beach. He remind how beautiful he found her, while she was posing for him . The small and delicate line of her. Her incredible sensual sex appeal. He always looking for a wife and when he meet Ahsha , he thought about found the one. It was rare to find a lady so beautiful and still have values, self respect and an immensely independence. It took them five months before even have sex while they already has week end. She wasn’t the kind to offer herself to anyone. She was a serious woman and right now he never regrets his choice to marry her. She was an incredible mother and a faithful spouse. She never give him any reason to doubt about her. Ahsha did , for a period she was wondering if her husband was cheating on her. One day , she just woke up and face the reality of her marriage. The lack of everything comparing to their debut. She hired a private detective and after two months , nothing. Absolutely nothing. Neither he was the best cheater in the world, neither he wasn’t cheating on her. The wife almost regretted he wasn’t. It would have add some spicy to their marriage. Discover a sexual appetite higher than the one he was showing her those past years.
“ I’m going to get me a sandwich , I’m starving ” Ahsha announced , before left the room. He decided to continue himself. He saw a little box with , Ahsha written on it but he never saw it before. Never in his all life. It was small as a box shoes. But in it , not shoes. Several black book note. At least 7 of them. He took one of them and see what was in it. But he didn’t have the time to read it since , from the other side of the corridor, Idriss woke up , crying , asking for some assistance. The husband went in his son bedroom, the book note in his hand . The baby just needed some swing and rocking. He took his baby on his arms and sit on the rocking chair. He balanced, calmy the boy immediately. But he was still really interest by the book note he discovered. He bring his son back to sleep , but he just needed one hands to done this. He really wanted to know what was it. He read the first line… it was Ahsha’s diary from 8 years ago. Unfortunately, he didn’t know that he just put a mortal stroke to his marriage and  opened the pandora’s box

So….some theory about what Ahsha secret can be ? 

Thank you for reading , Merci d’avoir lu 

secretlyadoombot  asked:

Why are you so fond of Morrison's action comics run when so many were disappointed and felt it didn't live up to All Star?

I’ll admit: I was very disappointed when I first read the new Action Comics #1. It was all…weird. Superman was a jerk! He’s threatening bad guys! He’s fighting cops (I can assure you, that last bit would not hit me so hard these days)! I got that a more Golden Age vibe was coming, but I guess I’d really just expected the All-Star version jumping over buildings. Once I adjusted though? Morrison’s Action is as good as it gets.

Certainly, as you noted, it’s not in the same echelon as All-Star. It was never, ever going to be. All-Star Superman was arguably the best creative team in comics working with near-total creative freedom as part of a new brand designed to mimic the success of Ultimate Marvel (which they’d later attempt again with the New 52 and, god help us all, Earth One, to considerably lesser results), meticulously and over the course of years, to do a single perfect predetermined story. Action was Morrison using some leftover ideas for a six-issue arc as a favor to DiDio, that happened to get expanded into something bigger when he was asked to do a two-issue filler story and it snowballed from there. It doesn’t belong in the All-Star tier, or even the gold standard of longform Morrison runs in Batman. But I think it might be on the JLA level.

I have to assume that the impossible All-Star comparison is what ruins it in most peoples’ eyes, because if you take a general poll, I expect you’d find

* Most people like the six-issue origin arc

* Most people like the two-issue Legion story

* Most people love the one-shots with President Superman, Superman’s first adventure and Krypto

* Most people dig the finale

The only part people seem pretty consistently ambivalent on is the 3-issue story with “The First Superman”, and while that’s definitely the weak point of the run, even that’s a better stretch of Superman issues than any non-Morrison Superman comics for at least about a year in either direction. He fights alien construction workers and adopts a new secret identity and learns all of medicine! That’s fun stuff! And right after this he fights a super-powered ghost mummy that wants to conquer the world! This whole run is full of more fun stuff than Superman got in some entire decades!

And that three-issue story was still instrumental in providing what almost no other version of the character has been given: a well-defined character arc. I wrote just the other day on how, unlike Batman’s fairly coherent personal narrative (to the point where Morrison built a whole run around that), Superman’s kind of fragmented into a bunch of different, incompatible takes. What Morrison tried to do was (by his own admission if I recall) force Superman into that same paradigm he’d worked with for Batman, imposing a character arc onto him that matched up with his actual real-world development: he starts as a rough-and-tumble social crusader, realizes he’s scaring people and starts to soften up a bit around the edges, turns into the wild Silver Age cosmic champion as weirder threats start coming along without losing sight of the little guy, goes through his (post-)crisis of the soul (though Morrison has him question if there must be a Clark Kent rather than a Superman, because if he has to pick between his own happiness and helping people, he’s instinctively going to go for the latter), and emerges out the other side as a synthesis of the best of all of those takes, a brawling kind-hearted hero of the people fighting cosmic madness. That’s practically the point of the last arc, where while he’s warring against a battalion of his greatest adversaries as the 3rd dimension falls apart around them, it’s still really about Superman fighting a dick businessman in a suit trying to co-opt and commercialize his image while talking ordinary people into unwittingly selling out their own best interests by posing as a benefactor (to the point where he emerges initially as a flock of angels), and Superman wins by uniting them against him. Instead of the largely soulless fusion of continuity details we got for Superman’s updated beginning in Secret Origin, this was a combination of personality takes that gave us a Superman who changed, fucked-up and grew while still being Superman.

Speaking of how this run was constructed, I also feel Morrison did a better job than anyone else on any of the major titles of actually living up to the premise of the New 52: reimagining and hyper-modernizing the characters while still keeping the essential spirit of what makes them work. Along with Rags Morales, Brad Walker, Gene Ha, Andy Kubert, Ben Oliver and Travel Foreman, he created an aesthetic for Superman and his world that looked sleeker (except that damn armor suit) and more ‘real’ while still including all the essentials. Major elements like Kryptonite, Metallo, Brainiac, Mxyzptlk and Krypto were overhauled and made more ‘realistic’ while still keeping all the stuff that made them cool. Villains with promising aspects who’d never fully worked like Doomsday, Zod and Terra-Man were recombined, remixed and reintroduced as new, honestly far superior creations like Super-Doomsday, Xa-Du and Nimrod. And along with that arc, and Morrison’s traditional weird ideas, efficient characterization and his recent thematic preoccupations with never-ending cycles (with Superman’s ultimate triumph at the end being to resist starting over again and moving forward so he can keep saving people), we got the best Superman run we’ve ever had - a take that should have changed him forever for the better, but like so much of Morrison’s greatest material intended to fix struggling concepts, ended up dust in the wind the moment he left.

At least it gave us t-shirt Superman, who was both great and also the only new concept introduced to the franchise in the last decade to meaningfully stick around for awhile. And Sholly Fisch’s backups were consistently A+, and in a just world he’d have been given the main Superman title.

anonymous asked:

Cayden a few hours ago I heard a commercial on the radio and nearly started crying so I looked it up and here's the translation because I want to share my happiness: Young girl: "hello, i'm lisa-sophie and this is for my parents. I see clearly now: I'm adopted! There are more and more hints and nobody else in my class has parents like you. And we don't even have anything in common! I like spaghetti, you like those fat steaks. (1/2)

And I have long blonde hair…. you are both bald. But that doesn’t matter, I love you. Because you two are simply the best dads in the world.“ ~ radio is great, blah blah blah~ (2/2)

This is really cute!!! What was the commercial for? It’s so awesome!

Disneyland is running all those Halloween commercials where the Villains are all happy because they’ve “taken over the park” now can you just imagine Halloween being like the biggest day of the whole year on the Isle of the Lost.

The one day the villains give their kids sweets and tell them how evil they are. Can you imagine all the costumes and decorations made from all the best scraps found on the Dumpster Barges. CAN YOU IMAGINE THE PRANKS.

Now imagine the Rotten Four’s first Halloween in Auradon. Everyone is going dressed up as knights and princesses. So far all the decorations for the party Audrey has planned are pink and sparkly. And the Villain Kids are like Nonononono we will show you how Halloween is done. And they just take over and make it the scariest/BEST Halloween party Auradon Prep has ever seen.

Bonus, they spend a whole week pranking each other and their new friends mercilessly and force them to wear costumes that are actually scary and cool.

blue-pancakes-dont-drown-deacti  asked:

Sizzy and the 'hold my new kitten while I kick this kids ass' au please

isabelle is so badass


If Simon was being honest, the guy definitely deserved it.

Simon believed passionately in a lot of things. He was very entrenched in his beliefs that respecting people regardless of race, sexuality, gender, religion, or any other set of characteristics was of the utmost importance. That’s why he found it borderline revolting when a guy that he (unfortunately) shared two classes with looked at the girl that Simon (fortunately) shared one class with and shouted an extremely demeaning catcall in her direction.

Isabelle Lightwood was the kind of girl that probably received hundreds of disgusting catcalls within a week. She was gorgeous. At the same time, Isabelle Lightwood was the kind of girl who probably managed to petrify men with just one glance in their direction and ward off any unwanted advances.

Personally, Simon found Isabelle Lightwood quite enchanting. She had been in his school for only two years now. She’d moved to the city with her three brothers (one who Simon saw in the senior wing when he went to AP Calculus and was terrified of, one who was still in elementary school, and one who was adopted and always flirted with Simon’s best friend) and had taken hold of his heart from the very first day in freshman year when she’d sat beside him in biology. Isabelle had only uttered about six words to Simon, but he didn’t blame her for that. They weren’t friends. They probably could be friends, because Isabelle was nice to everyone who was nice to her.

Simon was just too scared to talk to her.

Keep reading

stairwaytorays  asked:

I have a prompt for you :) Rey, Finn, and Poe are all at Rey's apartment watching a big football game and being really loud. Kylo's next door about to go over and complain but before he can Rey invites him in. (By the way, I think your writing is great. One of my favorite Reylo authors)

“TOUCHDOOOOOWN!” Finn and Poe shouted, standing up in excitement.

 “YEEEEEEEEEEEEESSS!!” A flurry of Cheetos came down upon the three friends as Rey jumped in excitement while holding the bowl of Cheetos. None of them particularly cared though – they were all too pumped about the touchdown.

 At that moment the doorbell rang. “I’ll go get it,” Rey said, squeezing past the two men as they did a victory dance. Rey padded across the apartment. Opening the door, she smiled when she saw her next-door neighbor. “Hey there! How’s it going?” Before he could respond, she noticed he had on a Jets t-shirt. “Oh my gosh, are you a Jets fan too? You should come watch the game with us!”  

 “Um, but – ”

 “Come on!” Rey said, grabbing his hand and pulling him inside. “Finn, Poe, this is my neighbor, Ben. Ben, meet Finn and Poe. He’s a Jets fan too, so I invited him in.”

 “Nice to meet you, bro,” Finn said as he stuffed some Dorritos into his mouth.

“Take a seat!” Poe said encouragingly as Rey shoved Ben onto the couch.

***

Ben wasn’t sure how the hell he had ended up in this situation.

 After getting more than a little frustrated with his exceedingly loud and obnoxious neighbors, he had walked over to give them a piece of his mind. However, he had ended up being dragged into the apartment, tossed onto the couch, and given a plate of nachos.

 Now that he thought about it, there were definitely far worse things a neighbor could do.

 As he munched on the nachos, Ben observed his rambunctious neighbors. They were the most stereotypical sports fans he had ever met in his entire life. He had always laughed at commercials or TV shows that had overzealous sports fans in them because he had found them so ridiculous and unrealistic. His neighbors to his amazement proved, however, that those depictions were not larger than life caricatures, but accurate renderings of real life sports fans. If Ben were to be completely honest, it was vaguely terrifying.

 However, Ben was noticing that the more time he spent with the trio, the more contagious their excitement got. He even found himself standing up and cheering along with them whenever the Jets scored a touchdown.

“YEEEEEEEEES!”

 “THIS IS THE BEST GAME EVEEEEER!”

 “YEAAAAHHH TAKE THAT SUCKERS!!!”

 “Woo hoo!”

 He hadn’t quite achieved the same level of enthusiasm yet.

 “So Ben,” Finn said as they settled down from another round of cheering, “what do you do for a living?”

 “I’m a doctor.”

 “Oh really? So am I!” He seemed genuinely excited to meet a fellow medical practitioner, “What do you specialize in?”

 “I’m a pediatrician. You?”

 “I’m still in my residency, but I’m going to be a neurosurgeon – OH FUCK NO!” The Dallas Cowboys had just scored a touchdown.

 “DAMN IT!”

 “BOOOOOOO!”

 “That’s unfortunate.”

 His disappointment also wasn’t quite as intense as Rey, Finn, and Poe’s.

***

“We’re sorry again for leaving before clean up,” Poe said apologetically as the two prepared to leave. “We really can’t be late for this dinner though.”

 “Don’t worry about it, it’s not a big deal,” Rey responded, “Besides, Ben volunteered to help.”

 “Thanks again for hosting,” Finn said with a smile. They both gave her a hug and were on their way.

 Ben, carrying a couple bowls into the kitchen, said, “I thought they were your roommates.”

 “They used to be,” Rey said as she wiped off her living room table, “But they moved out after they got married.”

 “That would make sense,” Ben called from the kitchen, presumably as he washed the dishes, “How long have they been married for?”

 “About a year now,” Rey came into the kitchen and picked up a dishtowel. She dried the dishes and put them away. For a while, the two worked in a comfortable silence. Rey was used to being surrounded by the wonderfully loud, chaos that was her two best friends so she was surprised to find that she actually enjoyed the quietness she shared with her neighbor.

 “By the way Ben, what was it you needed in the first place?”

 “What do you mean?”

 “I assume you hadn’t expected to end up joining us to watch the game, so was there something else you needed?”

 When Ben didn’t say anything, Rey turned towards him and found him blushing. It was extremely adorable. “Um… well…” He stared at the plate he was cleaning like it was the most fascinating thing he had ever seen. “To be honest… I had come to ask if you could… perhaps… be a little… quieter.”

 Rey blinked a couple times before bursting into laughter. Ben appeared to be very confused by her sudden outburst. “I don’t understand why that’s so funny.”

 Rey took a couple moments to calm herself before saying, “Our previous neighbors always used to get mad at the three of us for being so loud. One time, someone came over and shouted at us for a solid half hour. Never has any of them acted embarrassed about being annoyed at us. Until you that is.” She chuckled again. “You know, when you moved in, the three of us took a bet to see how many games into the season it would take before you came over and chewed us out.”

 Ben leaned against the kitchen counter and raised an eyebrow at her. “Oh really?”

 “Mhmm,” Rey said with a cheeky smile.

 “What did you guess?”

 “Not saying.”

 “Come ooooon,” Ben playfully whined.

 “Nope.” Rey laughed as he pouted. “I have to say though. I’m really glad you came over to yell at us.”

 “I wasn’t going to yell –”

 “You’re a pretty cool guy,” Rey continued, “I might never have known that if you hadn’t come over.” Rey watched as another blush brightened Ben’s face. She had to admit, finding out that her tall and physically imposing neighbor had a tendency to blush when he was embarrassed was absolutely delightful. It made her want to tease him some more, but she restrained herself.  

 “Well,” he said, obviously trying to play it cool but failing, “you’re pretty chill gal yourself.”

 “Did you just use the word gal?”

 “What’s wrong with gal?”

 “Too many things to list.”

 The two laughed and Rey sensed that this might be the beginning of a beautiful friendship. However, when their hands accidently brushed each other’s as Ben handed her a plate, Rey felt her face grow warm. What the hell? Since when do I blush? Rey thought to herself. As she casually glanced over at her neighbor, curious if he had experienced a similar reaction, Rey couldn’t help but wonder if perhaps there was something more in store for the two of them.

***

As the door to Rey’s apartment closed behind him, Ben placed a hand over his heart as if that would somehow still its rapid beating. Their hands had touched. Briefly. That was all. Why in the world was he getting so worked up about it? He looked over his shoulder at Rey’s apartment door, wanting to go back inside and talk with her so more, but he didn’t. Instead, he went back to his apartment, confident that he would get to the chance to see her again soon.  

mornings.

“I love you.”

He said it with his eyes closed, lips barely parted, the words coming out in one solid breath, more like a sigh than a sentence.

I glanced up at him, or at the small corner of chin I could see from that angle, my head resting on his chest. I ran my fingers over the fine hairs of his forearms and replied, “What’s wrong?”

“Nothing.”

“Then why’d you use your dramatic voice?”

“Because I love you.”

“Dramatically?”

He responded with another sigh, a real one this time, non-verbal. I resisted the urge to giggle. I used to think my tendency toward levity was one of my better character traits, but I think maybe I just never learned how to take anything seriously.

I rose from his chest, uncomfortable in the growing heat of the room. He kissed my forehead before I wriggled away, his eyes still closed as I bounced off the bed and to the bathroom.

I sat down to pee, frowning, and then yelled at him through the open door, “I love you too.”

He didn’t reply and I got up, flushed, washed my hands and began to brush my teeth. He came in and lifted the seat. When he finished he joined me at the sink. I caught his eyes in the mirror, the blue foam frothing out my mouth, naked but for my ratty underwear. He was in a tee shirt and boxers, his breath smelled like garlic aioli and beer and sleep.

My heart was beating too fast and I felt a familiar tension creeping up my neck and splaying in a wide tee across my shoulder blades. I forced a smile. Today would be one of those days, I knew, when every moment, from cereal vs toast to Skytrain vs the 22 bus, was going to be a decision about a million other, bigger things. Today was one of those days when the fact that we were out of butter and that rent was due and my Rogers payment was too goddamn high because who really needs that much data anyway and it’s raining, it’s always raining and late late late, today was one of those days when all of those little things would actually be about a million bigger things.

Today was one of those days when my thoughts would crawl around my skull like fire ants and the only clear and coherent one to rise above the buzzing would be “I can’t do this.”

Today was one of those days when I would be the cause of my own undoing and he would be coming down with me. I saw it all then, as we stood with blue mouths and sleepy eyes, the day having not yet begun but having really ended already. I spit, he spit. My pinky finger found his on the porcelain.

“Wash, rinse, repeat.” I said it cheerfully, like a commercial.

“It won’t always be like this,” he said, because he knows me best, “it won’t always feel like we’re waking up just to tire ourselves out so that we can sleep again.”

“I love you.” This time my eyes were closed. My words all breath.

“Don’t be so dramatic,” he replied. The bastard.

2015 MAMA reaction compilation

So I kinda went crazy today at MAMA and instead of spamming my blog, I decided to do it in one post. Be prepared if you’re going to read it, in case you need a detailed review.

Taeyeon looking like a goddess

Exo shows up in their pajamas

Exo wins best asian style (the irony)

Taeyeon performs like a goddess

BTS and GOT7 performance = kill me now

Twice wins Best New Female Artist oh ah yeah

Big Bang best MV and Seungri’s adorable speech

Hyuna wins best solo dance yess slay ‘em girl

San E (a.k.a Naruto) winning best rap

Kwangsoo too high for the mic lol

Everyone’s looking way too tall

OMG SO MANY GOOD FEMALE ARTISTS WHO TO CHOOSE

Taeyeon wins best female artist hell yess she deserves it

Taeyeon looks like an angel is she even real omfg

Small Baekyeon moment but not really cause Baek tries to ignore looking at her because if he does stupid people will bash them >.< (a.k.a. my heart breaking)

JYP best male artist and Twice sending hearts to PDnim how adorbs

iKon performance

All the MC girls are so pretty

Everyone is so pretty I’m so jealous

Rap break omg they be slaying

Chanyeol gets embarrassed when the camera is on him but why though he looks smokin and Suho too

Show meeeh the moneeeey

lol, Jessi’s furry pink coat is in the way

What’s up with everyone wearing pink furry stuff

Look at Hyuna go she’s so good

Fuck these commercials honestly, they’re so fucking obnoxious

omfg those male backup dancers what have I witnessed

YES F(X) GLOBAL FANS CHOICE FEMALE FUCKING YES if anyone ever says something bad about fx again i sWEAR

Global Fans Choice Male is EXO and Suho looks hella good, Baek spreading the love in that bunny sweater, Sehun and Soo looking uninterested lol. 

Seventeen and Monsta X so fresh and lovely

Best Vocal Performance Male = Zion.T

Best Vocal Performance Female AILEE UNNIE SO FREAKING AMAZING

That girl’s struggle with English is real

Got7 and Twice awkwardly jamming to JYP’s songs (excluding Jackson and BamBam, they’re enjoying every second)

JYP almost haves sex with a dancer while Twice is covering their eyes lmao this is the best thing I’ve seen so far

Best Dance Performance Female Group honestly I wouldn’t be able to choose if I wasn’t biased BUT RED VELVET WON HELL YESS MY BABIES

Red Velvet looks so elegant and beautiful like damn

OMG SHIT’S ABOUT TO GO DOWN IT’S BEST MALE DANCE PERFORMANCE

Bow down bitches, SHINEE WON THIS IS THE BEST THING, Key’s hat though

CL THE BADDEST FEMALE, wait wtf is that on her head, oh nvm she took it off

It still amazes me how she’s able to own the stage every single time

omg is that the girl from the bang bang bang mv

2NE1 slayed the stage, let me tell you HELLO PARK BOM

Here comes EXO, oh boy I’m not prepared

Kai’s and Lay’s little dance breaks omo

FREAKING LIGHTSABER AND CHANYEOL RAP AND DROP THAT LMR YESSSSS Sehun is such a noodle I LOVE EVERYONE

oh hello Kyungsoo where you’ve been, WOWOW ChenBaekSoo vocals

Red Velvet clapping along Exo’s songs so cuteee

All fandoms going on about unfair performance line up

Jonghyun doing some weird Harry Poter thing with some lamps

Oh snap Shinee’s on stage wtf is Key wearing

EYOOO BIGBANG how did they manage to look the same as they did during Loser promotions

Bae Bae

SEUNGRI IS SITTING IN SEHUN’S LAP I’M ABOUT TO COLLAPSE AND CHANYEOL IS SENDING FLIRTY LOOKS TO THEM

^ see this VIP’s and EXO-L’s, this is a sign of eace no more fan wars pls

Now Seungri is at TTS’ table what is happening

Wow, BigBang. Just, wow. The energy men…

BTS WINS WORLD PERFORMER I can hear Armys going cray in the background but hands down they deserve every award imo + they’re all so pretty

Girl’s Generation is the year’s best female group no surprises here except where is Girl’s Generation, I only see TaeTiSeo 

Best Male Group. I’m scared for my life.

EXO. THE LORD IS WITH ME! But let’s be fair, probably every single nominee would’ve deserved it

They showed Taeyeon how dare don’t start anything Mnet (#baekyeontrashforlife)

Baekhyun is giving a speech and he’s so lovely I wanna hug him.

*f(x) voice* : “Love is 4 wa-au-au-au-aulls”

WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK IS WITH THOSE OUTFITS PSB

What have I done to deserve these outfits 

Kong HyoJin is adorbs as ever

BANG BANG BANG IS SONG OF THE YEAR I mean we all saw it coming that song is catchy as hell

LMAO, TOP doesn’t even have to say anything and the crowd goes crazy

Now the album oh-oh I don’t like this

JK EXO WON FUCK YEAH BITCHES Suho is so happy he doesn’t know what to say, I mean chincha saranghaja

Chanyeol’s eyes, fuck.

Pls Kyungsoo scream again.

SEHUN SPEAKING MANDARIN, wait a fuck, SEHUN ACTUALLY SPEAKING.

Kyungsoo didn’t scream I’m offended.

ARTIST OF THE YEAR!!!

BigBang, is GD about to cry???

Longest speech in history, but for some reason so emotional >.<

why the dramatic music oh it’s psy

You have to have guts to perform like him

TBH, looking back at it, with non-biased eyes, I agree with most of the awards

IT’S ENDING AND I’M HAPPY AND PROUD YESS 

This year was definitely better for kpop!

FLASHFIC: long time listener

Another jam fic from the Discord. Davekat. In which Dave is the DJ of a radio station and someone keeps requesting terrible music during his shift.

> Dave: Be the rider.

No, it’s ‘be the Midnight Strider,’ your current on-air personality for Radio SBRB (complete with asinine We’ll BRB after these messages! jingle), the radio station you work at. You try to keep things fresh and change your DJ moniker on the regular. 

You keep a list to avoid any repeats: DJ DS was the first title you awarded yourself, back when you were shoved on the air only two days after your interview. The Turntech Godhead was a longrunner, almost two months, but you didn’t like how many randos hit you up on pesterchum once they figured out it was your handle there. Now, you’re the Midnight Strider after the nickname your older sister gave you stuck. You’ll move on to something fresh and new as soon as the next idea occurs to you.

You claim to just be The Strider before 12AM ticks around, as your shift starts at 10PM, actually. There are few things more satisfying than playing the THX cinema hum at 11:59 to announce the start of your reign of musical benevolence.

This is probably why management likes you, you think. You extemporize. Like a good DJ should.

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"We Should Clone Misha!"

Is the strange turn a conversation between myself and waddupfandom took the other day. A perfectly normal conversation devolved into us exchanging Misha gifs and generally fangirling over the perfection that is Misha Collins, when we were struck by a thought. Everyone loves Misha, and every fangirl/fanboy would love to meet The Bluest Eyes to Ever Blue in person, right? Then we had a wonderfully absurd idea: We should clone him so everyone can have their own Misha!  

Seriously guys, this could be the best thing EVER! Think about it! You could have your very own Misha Collins! You could go to any major retail store and just walk out with your own Misha! Can you imagine? You wake up: there’s Misha! You have a bad day: Misha is right there! You need a hug: get one from your Misha! Build your own Misha army just in time for the next Mishapocalypse! The possibilities are endless!   

Still not convinced this is the greatest idea ever? Waddupfandom and I could also produce a Castiel version! They would be sold individually and, for those who can’t decide, they would also be available as a boxed set. Heck, we could even make mini versions of Misha and Cas for people who live in small apartments or do a lot of traveling. We could call it the Fun Size! See? Convenient! They would, of course be very affordably priced ($2 each, $1 each for Fun Size) because we got our fandom family’s back!

This needs a freaking commercial!

Do you love Misha Collins? Are you a ‘Minion’, ‘Mishamigo’, or 'Misha’s Best Friend’? Do you spend you days daydreaming about meeting, or even just breathing the same air as the perfect ray of sunshine that is Misha Collins? Well stop daydreaming because thanks to Super FandomFun Co. now you can get your very own Misha! Take him to the park, to your friend’s house, to the mall, everywhere! Have tons of fun, leave dignity at the door and make the word 'Normal’ an insult!  Each Misha comes complete with numbered certificate of authenticity, and your choice of accessories. 

Super FandomFun Co. also has Misha in a Castiel version so you can also have your very own Angel of the Lord. Castiel comes with his trademark trenchcoat, Angel Blade, and of course, sex hair. 

Do you live in a small apartment, or travel frequently? No problem! Misha and Castiel are also available in a smaller, space-saving, travel friendly Fun Size so you can take them anywhere! Both sizes sold individually or as a boxed set. Get yours today!

Disclaimer: Super FandomFun Co. is not responsible for strains, sprains, loss of consciousness, damage to vocal chords, deafness, broken bones, imploded/exploded craniums, liquefied brain matter, exploded ovaries, or heart attacks due to extreme fangirling, and cannot be held liable for any resulting real life Mishapocalyses.“ 

 It could work, right?  Guys?

eamonwhalen  asked:

Who else used to be hip hop canon but isn't anymore because modern memory is stupid?

This is a good question. Obviously the canon is a completely abstract construct and I’m sure some of this shit could quickly be negated by a “but he’s huge in Germany!” or a “but they were trending on Twitter when the Unsung documentary aired!” but I don’t really care to split those hairs. So here are a bunch of once revered rap artists who seem like they don’t get nearly as much or enough love anymore:

Schoolly D - The guy invented gangster rap but now is mostly known for his contributions to a cartoon about a talking meatball, if at all. His first few records were absolutely otherworldly - reverb drenched unapologetic street shit that I think might appeal to people who dig those shitty Chief Keef records I just posted about. And then slowly over time he grew into making really thoughtful street shit which is precisely how it’s supposed to go down. Plus his artwork destroys all of the other artwork and he gives an awesome interview.
Where to start: “PSK;” Schoolly D LP.

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