because this is just too hilarious

anonymous asked:

Have you seen the sweet debate? Do you think tumblr focuses too much on the same sex relationships in Shakespeare and not overarching play? Just wanted your opinion you don't have to answer.

I did see the Discourse, which like all Tumblr Discourse is at some level hilarious. “As I said above, ‘sweet’ can’t be interpreted as gay code because straight characters use it too” is probably the funniest sentence I’ve ever read. Delightfully 1970s reactionary academia.

Do I think sweet is “gay code” as the blogger so delightfully put it? (Really gotta get somebody to tell me these secret gay codes one day) I don’t know, but I think (like @leeks-is-good said) it’s a complex word that does have certain connotations and great Shakespearean academics have built a lot more on a lot less. I don’t think the bloggers against it had any argument, which is why they tried to distract from it by attacking fandom trends. And trying to build your case that “sweet is used by straight people too” by claiming Henry V is straight doesn’t really help your argument.

Do I think the tumblr fandom focuses “too much” on queer interpretations and relationships? Well, I was the student worker in charge of compiling every single academic paper on Shakespeare written in the world over the past five decades. Of the thousands and thousands I looked at, there were maybe a few dozen, a hundred at most, that discussed a queer interpretation of Shakespeare in any sort of serious way. If the Shakespeare fandom, filled primarily with young, queer, educated academics, wants to focus on and find evidence for queer interpretations…I believe any “too much” is completely offset by the “none at all” of professional publications.

If you hate queer interpretations bc you feel like that’s all you ever hear about, talk to an established Shakespearean. Pick up literally any academic journal. Go outside for five minutes. I can promise you that you won’t find anything gay there. In the meantime, sit down, shut the fuck up, and don’t claim to believe in Foucaultian author theory then immediately whine/argue that Shakespeare did or didn’t do anything “on purpose.” 💅

ok don’t get me wrong the ‘salt and pepper diner’ bit is hysterical, but john mulaney has so many more hilarious stories that no one seems to talk about:

•the party at the house of the teacher that everyone hated

•the dog trainer

•meeting bill clinton


•“-too old to be a duckling, quack, quack!”

•“eat ass, suck a dick, and sell drugs.”

•literally any story involving his parents (especially the black coffee one)

just please, do yourselves a favor, don’t just stop at ‘salt and pepper diner’, listen to all this guy’s stories because they are gold

One of my favorite things about Empire of Storms is when Elide and Lorcan are running for their lives and Elide is too slow and Lorcan keeps glancing at her but doesn’t know how to tell her because he’s low key afraid of her and she just sighs and says “do it” because of course she knows what he’s thinking and without another word he just throws her over his shoulder and takes off. That scene was hilarious and I love my grumpy teddybear son and my genius slytherin queen so much

Okay, but a Jack and Gabe who knew something was fishy from the beginning of Overwatch. So they staged their separation to see if the bad guys would come knocking on their door. But fighting infiltration was a losing game, so they staged their accidents because it would collapse Overwatch and let the good people get out before it was too late.

Now Gabe is the inside man infiltrating the organization, and Jack has the freedom to focus solely on tracking down the bad guys. Gabe has actually been slowly starting to disintegrate for years because of the SEP. Jack’s scars were because of Gabe’s plan fucking up, and he doesn’t let his boyfriend forget it.

Gabe thinks it’s hilarious that Sombra still hasn’t figured out his ‘Reaper’ persona isn’t genuine. Kid is too fond of her own theatrics to suspect Gabriel’s.

Jack thinks it’s hilarious that Winston hasn’t caught on that he’s been feeding Athena information through old command codes.

Just - sneaky dads taking on the world together. (They get found out when Reaper kills the Talon agent about to put a bullet in Jack’s head. Jack insists he has everything under control. Sombra is in tears that Gabe pulled one over on her. Winston is not pleased that Widowmaker and Sombra come with Gabe when he returns. Widowmaker is a peanut butter thief.)

With as many kids as Bruce has adopted it’s highly possible that the media has made at least one reference to it, probably something along the lines of: “Bruce Wayne buys houses like he adopts children.”

Contrary to how his family feels (they think it’s hilarious) Bruce actually likes it. The first time he uses the phrase in reference to himself his family is Horrified (and in Damian’s case Offended). “I’ve been buying shares of Apple like I adopt kids.”

They all assumed it was a fluke, a slip of the tongue, until it happened again. Tim and Damian had been fighting and ended up ruining a set of Batarangs. Bruce sighed making a note to replace the set mumbling “I collect these like I collect kids.”

The line stopped Tim mid swing at Damian, both turning to stare slack jawed at Bruce.

“Father, I’m not sure you’re aware of what you’ve said.”

“What’s the matter with what I said?”

It gets to be a habit, and no one can figure out why he likes it. Has he become aware of his habit? Is he some how purposefully making fun of himself? Jason swears it’s to remind himself not to adopt any more children. At last they all corner him in his office, Bruce looking confused from his desk as his children march in one by one.

“Why?” is how Tim starts it.

“Why?” Bruce frowns.

“Adoption. Why do you keep making the joke?” Cassandra clarifies.

Dick adds, “You’re not embarrassed of us are you?”

If their question surprised him it doesn’t show as Bruce sits silent at his desk, watching his children for a moment. “It reminds me of how proud I am of each of you.” He let his gaze rest on each of his children, pausing a beat longer on Damian to remind his son that yes he meant him too.

After that it wasn’t rare to hear the Wayne kids making a joke about their father’s adoption skills.

ppl always use lyrics from shake it off to make a dig @ taylor’s songwriting skills which i find hilarious because the shake it off lyrics are genuinely the most profound and meaningful lyrics i have ever heard in my life. like literally look me in the eyes and tell me that the haters aren’t, in fact, going to hate. you can’t do it. because the haters WILL hate and that’s just the way things are but i guess the truth of that statement is too confronting for some ppl </3

draco is the kind of person that likes to sleep in and snuggle deeper into the sheets when the morning sun peeks through the windows
harry is the kind of person that has never been able to sleep for too long and as such, while he enjoys not having to get up in the morning, usually wakes way before his partner does
sometimes he just lies in bed and looks at him, reads a book or does some paperwork and sometimes he gets up and has an early brekfast or walks their dog
and that domesticity is fucking sugary
but i also like to imagine them as elderly people

harry still doesn’t sleep much
but now draco has to get up early too because of his damn bladder and he is the grumpiest old man there ever was simply because he wants to sleep but can’t.
and that is just hilarious.

Zodiac Signs: 12 Sense of Humor

Aries: Goofy, physical humor comes most naturally. These are some of the top mimics in the Zodiac! But they are also known to be quite witty out of the blue.

Taurus: Observational humor. They are usually unintentionally hilarious, and can take a step back and laugh at themselves too!

Gemini: Quick on the uptake, they remember jokes really well and can laugh at just about anything, This sign is most prone to making fun of someone, but not in a mean way, it’s usually because they’re interested.

Cancer: This sign has an endearing self-deprecating way of being funny. As simple as a silly facial expression or pretending to be serious when they’re not.

Leo: This sign tends to take everything in around them and deliver it verbally with a bit of exaggeration that not only is hilarious, but leaves you wanting to hear more. They know when they have you hooked, too.

Virgo: The pissed, but not pissed, complaining, but not complaining, snarky wit about people and their lives is usually very humorous and entertaining.

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How will be being a father change John?
Well, I think in the ways that it does in real life, I guess — the ways that it changes you as parents in real life. That’s just a big responsibility. It can’t change the show that much because the dynamic of the show generally speaking is Sherlock and John, and their shenanigans fighting crime, but there has always been an emotional heart to the show as well, I think. It’s not just a procedural CSI type crime of the week thing. It’s also always been about that friendship between those two and the other people in it. John is a little bit changed, but you can’t change the shape of the show too much.

this answer is just so fucking hilarious im girg  ewfjkwekf 

martin: well, having a baby is going to change john, i guess. but like, the show is about john and sherlock and their life together. i mean, i guess, it’s a baby, you know.. but the show will never be about anything other than its emotional heart, john & sherlock
the interviewer: i… that’s not what i asked? 


Sweet summer child Yugyeom’s struggles during girlfriend-related missions

i really should turn this blog into dailyjojodads because i have so much to say on dadseph and dadtaro too. in honor of that, here’s a dadtaro post.

Jotaro in his forties was not a great parent. HOWEVER, I think 17 yo Jotaro would have been super fond of Jolyne if she pulled some sailor moon Chibi-usa nonsense.

Just look at this:

If Jolyne had pulled that on one of Dio’s lackeys during SDC as a time traveler from the future, imagine how Jotaro must feel, because that is so hilarious and so like him. Plus, she’s delivering one liners too?? Polnareff, Kakyoin, and Joseph would be giggling a bit too. There’d be moments where they disagree (maybe Jolyne is carrying baggage from the future), but everyone around them comments they deal with it so similarly… jfc Jotaro did you clone yourself?

I propose an AU idea: Jolyne can stop Pucci if she goes back in time and works through the SDC era with the Squad. She tells Jotaro she’s his future daughter because this is JJBA and time paradoxes don’t matter. Hijinks and maybe characters that get to live instead of die ensue.

Also she’s got the Chibi-usa buns so whaddup

So I read the first 11 Series of Unfortunate Event books when I was a kid, and I just read the last two books last year.

One really big shift for me was, as a kid the villains were absurd, and the clueless or hapless adults were hilarious. As an adult reading the books though, the previously incompetent or ignorant adults made me extremely angry. Because see, now I understand more about what it takes to care for adolescent and young humans, and I could see clearly exactly how society was failing them. And it’s still entertaining and funny except when you remember that actually, kids are abused and neglected by the adults they rely on all the time. The social dynamics are taken to absurd lengths, but they reflect a reality that actual children have to deal with all the time. And for kids reading it, seeing the Baudelaire’s resourcefulness and resilience may be a powerful model.

But for adults? It’s a reminder that our actions and the way our society is set up affects children in often terrible ways. It’s a reminder that we have a responsibility.

I actually have to gather to myself because I’m just gonna say it:


It was hilarious, meaningful but also so damn random all at the same time but it worked so well. The change from having all the tension from the competitions to seeing the skaters hang out for the day was simply amazing. This was definitely a fun episode and one that I’ll be re-watching whenever I need a laugh or to be assaulted by feels. 

The one thing I loved so much about this episode was that it was told from Viktor’s point of view. Usually, it’s told through Yuuri’s but today, we actually got to see inside Viktor’s head, his thoughts and his feelings. We never really know what Viktor’s thinking about though it’s quite clear through his actions but it’s so nice to see what goes on in that head of his. 

The fact that he cares so much for Yuuri is incredible, I never doubted it but to actually hear it is something else. The way he looked at Yuuri throughout this episode, the way he holds so much affection for him is so much that I simply couldn’t sit still. Even though it hasn’t been said, it’s obvious to see that the love is there and there is no queerbaiting involved. The show has been consistent with their relationship and hasn’t dialed back on how important their relationship is. 

In fact, they’ve dialed up even further. 

(Kubo knows what she’s doing and she’s doing a FABULOUS JOB!)

Then the fucking rings, you’ve gotta be kidding me. 

My heart can’t even handle how married these two are, putting the rings on each other’s fingers because that was basically a proposal. It’s a good luck ring, like a charm but as Viktor said, it also doubles as an engagement ring. We never got Yuuri’s answer because the moment Viktor said ‘gold medal’, all the skaters were like ‘bitch what?’ and it got all tense.



Also, Obatek is my new son and Yurio’s best friend, I’m so happy that I saw my angst son smiling and actually having a good time because he deserves it, yes he does. 

Chris has also redeemed himself because he’s really cool and funny and I like him. 

Also, Phitchit, my dear, was adorable and wonderful as always. Actually thought his best friend was getting married, announced to the restaurant, has no shame and I love him. 

Then…Yuuri being drunk. 

Where do I even begin?

He wanted to let loose and he wasn’t exactly in the best of moods. So he drank.

And drank.

And drank.

Then proceeded to:

  • Challenge Yurio to a dance-off (which he won!)
  • Strip and pole dance with Chris (who was in his element)
  • Dance (the Tango, I’m guessing??) with Viktor (those two were destined to be together from the start)
  • Stumble around with a champagne bottle.

It has now been shown that Yuuri was the one to put the idea of Viktor being his coach into his head. 

Meaning it wasn’t the video of Yuuri skating that pushed Viktor into doing it fully. 











some Tadashi Hamada headcanons because why the heck not

–he’s rather sweet and shy to new people, but he opens up pretty easily once he’s introduced to them.

–he’s pretty snarky and sassy around his friends, and he’s a complete and utter jerk to Hiro just because he’s his little brother and he can.

–he sings in the shower. really loudly. like, at the top of his lungs loudly. he’s not a bad singer–actually, he has a beautiful voice–but sometimes Aunt Cass has to tell him to quiet down because people in the café downstairs can hear him over, like, everything

he’s also a surprisingly great dancer, but sometimes Aunt Cass has to yell at him because his dancing gets a little too suggestive

he’s terrified of creepy crawlies. whenever he sees one he visibly freaks out, probably makes an unmanly shriek noise, grabs whatever’s close to him and just chucks it at the offending insect. Hiro thinks it’s hilarious.

–he LOVES texting. he’s always texting Hiro and everyone else every chance he gets, and Gogo says he’s addicted to it.

–the little moped/scooter thing he drives in the movie was originally his father’s. normal vehicles never really caught his interest as a kid, but he loved the scooter. his dad would always take him for rides on it, and he promised Tadashi that it would become his when he was old enough. after his parents’ deaths, he never worked up the nerve to even touch his father’s scooter until he was around 16 and got his license. even then he felt bad for tampering with it, but he couldn’t just leave it lying around forever. besides, normal vehicles still didn’t interest him much.

–he sometimes wears glasses, but he only needs them to read.

–when he was four years old and his mother was pregnant with Hiro, he swore up and down that she swallowed a ball. so when Hiro was born, when he saw his little brother for the first time, he said in a very serious voice “that is one weird-looking ball.”

–he loves coffee, and every time Hiro gives him crap about it, he replies with something along the lines of “it’s no worse than those sugary sodas you like to drink.”

–he’s always sneaking sweets from the café downstairs, but he’ll never admit it.

–he’ll also never admit that he sometimes eats Hiro’s gummy bears on him

–he doesn’t watch a whole lot of TV, but when he does find a show that he likes, he gets hooked, and ends up binge-watching it on Netflix for like 12 hours straight

he prefers soft music to hard music, and upbeat music to edgy music. heavy metal scares him.

–there’s a reason he’s usually wearing a blazer or some sort of coat–he’s always cold!

–he gets slightly cross-eyed when he’s panicked

–he picked up a little bit on Aunt Cass’ baking skills, and he makes the best chocolate chip cookies in San Fransokyo


Thank you all so much I truly appreciate this,, I honestly never thought this would happen, at least half of this must be spam blogs but oh well XD

I want to do some shout outs to a few followers but even if you aren’t on here I’ll probably forget some people cz I have such a bad memory anyway XD just know that I really appreciate you and I love you all<3!!

@starburstskies Zaraaa You’re amazing! and tbh I can’t even remember how I met you but I’m so glad I did!! and because of you I’ve met so many other amazing people too so thank you ilyy<3

@christinelucka Christineee I remember you gave me my first colouring request and I was so nervous about it XD The meme queen and I’m so glad to know you!! love ya so much<3

@animoozies The typo queen and founder of @slutsforh2o Connie! ilyy I think you are so hilarious and just a great person all round your positivity and kindness is so refreshing and it helps me and a lot of people more than you know, also YOU’RE SO TALENTED those piano skills had me almost in tears wtff 

@terironi Ronnieee ah I’m having little flashbacks with memories of everyone now XD I think I still remember the first time we talked, when you asked me to colour one of your ft drawings and your mum said I was polite XD Your art is amazing and I love it when you post new drawings,  you’re also so nice and I’m so happy we’re friends<3

@thebluefuckingunicornblr hey it’s my mum, sarah! you are lovely and your lipstick is always on point XD and you have so many talents, you sing, you draw, you write I’m so happy I met you!!<3

@mustang-hawkeye17 Emma!! believe it or not you were one of the first people I ever spoke to on this site, You are such a nice person and you’re fics are adorable and so creative I love them and youre tags on my drawings give me life omgg XD ily<3!

@leashykitty-chan Leashy!! ilysm you were also one of the first people I spoke to on here and I’m so glad because you are one of the kindest people I’ve ever met, you are so caring and supportive and I really love talking to you <3!

@juviarainworld Diya! I love your blog , you’re aesthetics are always absolutely perfect like I actually don’t know how you do it XD<3!

@erzawesome Aleena!! my wee cutie<3 I still can’t actually believe you follow me XD I read your fics before we even started speaking and omgg I can’t put into words how much I love them!! and that gift chapter omggg!! I still can’t thank you enough for that, I’m honestly like a fangirl XD but you are such a cool person too and I’m glad we met!<3


@ginamontier @pineappland @chychymazzu @lucy-tail  @skyeforger  @oberstroymustang  @reflect-to-regret @millydr  @fairywithastrawhat @gelichina @reinbowthoughts  @clearcandymusic @toomusiccheesecake @neinsupris @pocketwoman7 @lillitu @ravenluckarts

Sorry if I missed any of us out I love you all anyway XD

colourists/ artists

@lord-rogue @celestialyukino77 @lockserh @fairymarie @cosmicloveoftheages @thatsvicchan @thatartcorner @watchmist1412 @peoniespoppiesandowlsohmy @pennytf all of your work is amazing and I really admire you for it!!<3

precious mutuals

@fairy-couples @lightningcards @trilarkabeth @assistantpandawinetakerkohii @furidojasutin @laura6181  @fairyknightworld @marumigamer @alittlemage @lynnlinera @witch-4-life @luce-dragneel @alwaysnarichtsu @ftshipper @otakuforlife12 @iloveshippingkitty @crows-with-keys @avnai @nalufan @7shinningwings @benisa1608 @stopnatsu @bnarutos @lucyheartfiliathecelestialmage @party-with-books @navi-the-annoying-fairy @bellonares @sophie-mey @rmbennett21 @naruhinagajevyfandom @indayiashow @hell-dragon-fire @not-a-recommended-url @ventus-rogue  @marys-corner @bibi-loves-books @black-cats-bring-good-luck @pluviophile-s @castiel-ren @alecrazy21 @andykayudha @the-fire-master @xternel @archangelalstone @plisets-ky @wretchedkotori @gruvia-for-life @fairytailsgemini @phantompierce-okamoto @lynntheripper @ruine420 @shenthewolf @the-mystifiying-walnut @lushihatofiria @maudthebookeater @juviagrayfullbuster @nothing-but-fairytail @rosesoto-universe @omgsniarf @bo-sh @y4y-wifi @baby-duck1233 @raioseucliffe-cheney @far-shore-resident @mrsallsunday @mageofsabertooth @immortalarhiart @tobio-froyo @taller-than-my-bias @air-of-fire @celestialmage14 @aiwilaa @larakurdi28 @googler49 @baerandish @kami-jakira @neato-ft @outertalefan @watehmelons @superfan163 @destinydueler @yarggray @thatcrazyfangir1 @ispookykittycollection @creativeblaze @kuroo-churro @trashboatshenanigans @bethisafreakshow @koheli @princesstutu5 @mak-tmnt @milemupy @fucking-dragneel @genisisvalkyrie @emmathehalf-bloodhunter @tremendouslynerdystrawberry @mrsleepyallthetime @celestialmagelucy @faelise @lucyheartfiliavevo @a117c @kuriyamamirai-san @requipmage1255 @iwishiwasinfairytail @lilyevanseviltwin @ifonly1fonly @megakonekochan17 @meadowofstars @snazzylavaca  @bowl-bowl-bowl @moonlustelara @winterpixier @crookedmoonlight123 @mystiqdreamer @arreisa-mist @rainteaanddragons @ask-kamigami-no-asobi @loveisstronger07 @boomtheregoesyourpants @ocerassa @cokesama @yer-a-fairytailwizard-natsu @happyxcat @sivera777 @kurobear-kun @catysrandom @jayaisland @janatscake @gcat-enthusiast @sorcererweeklyjason @sonnets-of-beauty @tsukiyoshida @marisya-sarha @luclaxx @scribble-heart @littlepanicmix @kare-niisan @madiiieeee14 @endragoneel @bluewatermuffin @buberryz @marabougirl @randomness-and-boredom @ladysnausages @doe-print

okay I will have to stop here cz my laptop is running out of battery XD but thank you all for following me and I’m sorry if you’re not on here love you guys!!!

I was reminded of one of my very favorite parts of Irish folklore, and now I have to tell you all about it. I like to call it “Cu Chulainn’s fear of boobies.”

There is never a moment I don’t find this hilarious.

Cu Chulainn’s fear of boobies is first mentioned in the story in which he becomes a warrior. You know this one; it’s very famous. It’s in the Tain, and everything. Cu overhears Cathbad the druid saying that whoever takes up arms that day with live a life of glory, so Cu runs off to do just that and ends up receiving Conchobor’s weapons and chariot because he’s Cu Chulainn who cares if he is six years old he’s too cool for other weapons and chariots.

So Cu and the charioteer (who’s probably wishing he’d retired) ride off and Cu ends up challenging these three foreign warriors to a battle while the poor charioteer bites his fingernails and hopes he’s not about to watch a six-year-old be violently decapitated (spoilers, he’s Cu Chulainn, he does the decapitating, while the people in the castle are wondering what the SHIT is happening down there).

After killing three grown men, lust for blood not sated, Cu Chulainn heads home, pausing on the way to kidnap a bunch of animals and tie them to the chariot. And that’s how he returns to Emain Macha, thundering along in this chariot, screaming with rage, with all this bewildered swans and deer and shit running along wondering what the fuck is happening.

Someone sees this and tells Conchobor, “oh shit oh shit Cu Chulainn is going to kill us all” to which Conchobor presumably replied “what” and had to have the whole thing explained. After someone patiently told him about this extremely angry six-year-old with all the animals, Conchobor said, “No, it’s cool, just send out a bunch of women to show him their boobs” to which I can only imagine the warriors went, “Boobs, sir?” and Conchobor confidently said, “Boobs. Trust me on this, guys.” 

Since everyone in Ulster does trust Conchobor, despite mountains of evidence telling them they shouldn’t, a bunch of women -in some versions led by Conchobor’s own wife- go out and flash their boobs at Cu Chulainn. Cu is so embarrassed by all the naked titties that he flings himself out of the chariot and covers his eyes. The Ulster warriors grab him and dunk him in a barrel of water, which immediately begins to boil because that’s how pissed this child is. Angry enough to boil water on contact. They dunk him in a second barrel, which begins to steam. They dunk him in a third one which stays cold and then Cu’s not angry anymore, and then everyone goes and gets drunk or something, I don’t know.

Hey wait! You might say. Cu was only six in that story! And six-year-olds are dumb! That doesn’t mean he’s afraid of boobies!


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Whatever you say [Remus x Reader]

(Gifs are not mine)

Anonymous said:

I don’t know if you are still wanting requests but i have a Remus Lupin request. You are Sirius’s younger sister and you try to stay away from him and his friends because you have a huge crush on Remus but Sirius prefers you to be with him so he can make sure you don’t get hurt, but you are always shy around Remus and Sirius figures it out and thinks it’s hilarious because Remus likes you too.

A/N: Set in the Marauder’s era. I changed this slightly but hopefully it is still enjoyable.

Description: Your older brother is the first to find out that you have a massive crush on Remus Lupin

Characters: Sirius Black, Remus Lupin, James Potter, Peter Pettigrew

Warnings: Just super fluffy :)

Word count: 1,270

November had come quickly, stripping the trees of their vibrant leaves and leaving a sharp sting in the air, turning the grounds of the castle harsh and grey. Despite the blustering winds you liked this time of year; the mist in the morning, the frost on the grass and the deep, almost unnatural blackness of the lake. It made the entire grounds seem so serene and more beautiful than ever. It was so different to your home in London. Grimmauld place was in a city, and the place did not exactly hold happy memories for you. When you arrived at Hogwarts you were amazed by how much more open it was. In your sixth year, the vastness still surprised you.

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