because this hit me in class

I think one of the reasons the Harry Potter Epilogue was so poorly received was because the audience was primarily made up of the Millennial generation.

We’ve walked with Harry, Ron and Hermione, through a world that we thought was great but slowly revealed itself to be the opposite. We unpeeled the layers of corruption within the government, we saw cruelty against minorities grow in the past decades, and had media attack us and had teachers tell us that we ‘must not tell lies’. We got angry and frustrated and, like Harry, Ron and Hermione, had to think of a way to fight back. And them winning? That would have been enough to give us hope and leave us satisfied.

But instead. There was skip scene. And suddenly they were all over 30 and happy with their 2.5 children.

And the Millennials were left flailing in the dust.

Because while we recognised and empathised with everything up to that point. But seeing the Golden Trio financially stable and content and married? That was not something our generation could recognise. Because we have no idea if we’re ever going to be able to reach that stage. Not with the world we’re living in right now.

Having Harry, Ron and Hermione stare off into the distance after the battle and wonder about what the future might be would have stuck with us. Hell, have them move into a shitty flat together and try and sort out their lives would have. Have them with screaming nightmares and failed relationships and trying to get jobs in a society that’s falling apart would have. Have them still trying to fix things in that society would have. Because we known Voldemort was just a symptom of the disease of prejudice the Wizarding World.

But don’t push us off with an 'all was well’. In a world about magic, JK Rowling finally broke our suspension of disbelief by having them all hit middle-class and middle-age contentment and expecting a fanbase of teenagers to accept it.

Also. Since when was 'don’t worry kids, you’re going to turn out just like your parents’ ever a happy ending? Does our generation even recognise marriage and money and jobs as the fulfillment of life anymore? Does our generation even recognise the Epilogue’s Golden Trio anymore?

if you’re struggling for AU ideas take a look-see at this list i wrote for my friend who dubbed it “better than the 10 commandments" 

1)     Coffee shop AU

i)       Barista and person who has a ridiculous coffee order

ii)      I’m worried about your coffee dependency

iii)     you accidentally poured boiling hot coffee over me so you’re responsible for taking me to A&E

iv)     you give me a different fake name every time you come into starbucks and I just want to know your real name bc ur cute but here I am scrawling “batman” onto your stupid cappuccino

2)      Flower shop AU

i)       You buy a weird amount of flowers and I’m concerned as to why

ii)      I’m allergic to flowers but I work in a flower shop – you’re a customer who’s very confused as to why I’d do that

iii)     (this is also a good way to incorporate flower meanings eg, buying certain colours/types for person to represent feelings etc.)

3)      Library AU

i)       You’re overdue on this book and I want it so I’m tracking u the fuck down

ii)      I work in the library and I’m a little concerned for your health bc you never stop studying

iii)     The library’s pretty empty save for you and me and OH that couple making out loudly in the shelves somewhere

4)      Awful first time meeting

i)       I accidentally punched you in the face when I was too overexcited about something

ii)      I thought you were my friend who’s just done something awful to me (read: cut my hair while I slept, dyed all of my clothes pink, etc. etc.) because you look similar from behind so I stormed up to you and shoved you from behind while calling you an asshole

iii)     You get the gist to this one

iv)     Oooh when you told me your name I thought you were joking because it’s fucking awful and I made a joke about it and things got awkward real fucking fast (perfect for a Hannibal au just saying)

5)      Weird places to meet/awkward meetings in general

i)       We live in the same block of flats but haven’t ever talked and Sunday morning we were both doing the walk of shame and had to stand in the lift together

ii)      “okay I know that being in the woods at 2am is a weird thing to be doing but my friend called me and- wait, why are you in the woods at 2am, fuck I’m going to die aren’t I?”

iii)     A personal favourite of mine – first day at a new job and oh fuck my boss is the person I drunkenly hooked up with last weekend/night

iv)     We keep accidentally running into each other I’m not a stalker I swear

v)      You live across from me in our apartments and we smile when we see each other but we don’t really know each other and oh you’re the stripper at my friend’s stag do/hen night fuck this is really uncomfortable

vi)     “My shower’s broken but I’ve got a date tonight could I possibly use your shower please?” “Oh sure (neighbour that I’ve been crushing on for the past six months) of course you can use my shower to get ready for your date (fuck fuck fuck)”

6)      Friends to romance – pining and all that wonderful shit

i)       You’ve got a date tonight and you asked for advice on what to wear but I’m so in love with you and damn you look good in the outfit I picked out for you

ii)      I really like you but you’re my best friend’s ex

iii)     You’ve liked me for ages and were really obvious about it and I didn’t like all the attention but now you’re over me I really miss it and fuck I think I like you too?

iv)     Somewhere along the way of getting into bar fights together, staying up all night with movie marathons, other friendship things, I’ve fallen in love with you but oh my god this could ruin EVERYTHING

v)      Friends with benefits oh wait I like you

7)      FAKE DATING HOLY SHIT I LIVE FOR THIS

i)       It’s my highschool reunion and I need a hot date so I can rub it in the faces of the people who hated me

ii)      My homophobic parents are coming to visit will you pretend to date me as an extra “fuck you”?

iii)     There’s a person who won’t stop bugging me will you pretend to be my partner so that they’ll fuck off?

iv)     I told my sister I have a boyfriend so she’d stop trying to set me up with people but now she’s coming to visit and I’m in too deep I need a fake boyf ASAP

8)      Soulmate aus

i)       The first words your true love(s) will say to you are tattooed on you and why the fuck are their first words something really ridiculous like ‘I’ll pay you a tenner to punch me in the face’ or ‘quick what’s your favourite animal’ or ‘fucking shit hell holy fuck wow oh my god jesus h Christ fuck me’ etc. or even worse a really ridiculous song lyric like  the opening lines of uptown funk or a high school musical song or smthing did you have to serenade me the first time you saw me asshole?

ii)      You get an ‘impression’ of your soulmate when you turn 18 or something but all I got was a strong smell of bananas or an overwhelming feeling that Thatcher was a good prime minister or an image in my mind of a fucking unicorn

iii)     The more ridiculous the better actually

iv)     Something like whenever your soulmate sings a duet you can’t help but join in and my fucking soulmate is in a goddamn band but I can’t sing for shit

v)      Or maybe something like soulmates always sneeze at the same time and I cant be sure but me and this kid in my French class just sneezed at the same time are we soulmates or was it a coincidence (proceed w character trying to make themselves sneeze around said person to see what’s what)

9)      Alternate universes for real

i)       Mermaids

ii)      Siren and asexual pirate who doesn’t understand why all his crew are losing their shit that person has a nice voice sure but what the fuck is happening

iii)     Hogwarts

iv)     We live in a world where the greek gods are real and you went and got yourself cursed and now I have to go on a fucking quest to sort this shit out why do I love you again?

v)      Pacific rim au (either they’re drift compatible or one of them is a ranger and the other stresses constantly bc what if they die yes I have read a fic like this no I didn’t come up with this one but it’s fucking good) (also if you haven’t seen that film go watch it now)

vi)     Literally any movie or book universe you like tbh just go for it

10)   Other aus that I like

i)       I wanted to go on the ferris wheel but there has to be two people to a cart come on random person let’s go oh wait are we stuck at the top? Fuck

ii)      We work in the same office and you have a goddamn squeaky chair and you wONT FUCKING STOP SQUEAKING IT BECAUSE YOU KNOW IT ANNOYS ME

iii)     Our mutual friend set us up on a blind date and I thought I’d hate it but you’re actually… kind of funny? But because I expected to hate it in no way am I going to let you change my mind just because you’re gorgeous and funny and intelligent oh no my friend is not winning this

iv)     It started to snow and I’m the only one of our friends who would go outside with you – I soon found out why none of the others would go out in the snow with you (this works best if they’re new friends who don’t know each other all that well) when you shoved a handful of snow down my back and declared snow war

v)      It’s nowhere near Christmas it’s literally still November would you calm down about Christmas wait no why are you getting the tree out no stop please stop (if you do this pre-relationship you can have the grouchy one secretly finding the other’s excitement endearing and falling in love with them actually that works for established relationship too)

vi)     Current partner got a new job in America (or other country far away) and we’re getting by on skype calls and emails but it’s not easy and then I met someone new (can be poly or can be finding the OTP person)

vii)   You want us both to get in shape and I hate working out/running but your ass looks really good in shorts oh the things I do for my friends and their nice asses

viii)  Carrying on from 10.vii. you’ve caught me checking you out in what I thought was a subtle way too many times and now you’re calling me out on it what do I do???

ix)     You’re an actor/other famous person that I really admire and I just saw you in the street and as I was debating whether or not to say hi you came up to me and started flirting what do I do??

x)      You were waving at your friend behind me but I got confused and waved back at you and now I’m dying of embarrassment but you think it’s cute

xi)     I sat down in the wrong class and I’m panicking but don’t want to get up and leave because the class has started and you think it’s hilarious and shut up you dumb fuck you don’t know me aahhh

xii)   I’m a waiter at this wedding and you’re a drunk guest who will not stop hitting on me please I’m trying to work no I can’t dance with you omg let me find you some water

xiii)  Our best friends are that awful ‘cute’ couple that make-out in public and call each other “sweetie” and “sugar” and “babe” and god they’re awful let’s talk about how awful they are – develops into “shit we’re the awful couple now”

xiv)  You pissed me off in class so I threw a book at your head and now I’m in detention and jesus fuck I hate you so much and the teacher made me apologise and wait you’re cuter up close and the way you talk is kind of nice actually oh fuck no

Okay I could go on forever but this is over 1,500 words of auing already I have too many ideas christ

send me some to @theskyis-forever with a pairing for me to write :)

It still hurts when I see you.

I still miss you sometimes.

It hits me in the middle of the night when I’m laying alone with nothing but my thoughts. It hits me in the middle of math class when I’m working on solving an equation. It hits me anytime it wants to, but it’s happening less and less.

You’re happy. It’s not because of me. I still wish that it was, but I’m happy for you. All I want is to see you happy.

I’m happy too, most of the time. I have good friends, a good life. I’m learning that I don’t need you for my happiness.

I think that this is letting go. I think that this is moving on.

It feels so good.

—  moving on and letting go.
Let me heal him!

Context: As my Paladin, I needed to heal one of my comrades with Lay on Hands because he just took a nasty hit. I also needed to get into a particular position to give my other comrades a flanking bonus. Unfortunately, this would mean I would have to provoke an attack of opportunity. I wasn’t afraid; I was counting on my high Armor Class (23) and Damage Reduction (-8) to keep me safe. So my enemy rolls for attack…

The enemy rolled a 1.

The DM allowed me to make a quick counterattack.

I rolled a 20.

So basically what happened was this. My Paladin politely pushes past the enemy.

PALADIN: Get out of my way. I need to heal my friend.

ENEMY: Hey, don’t ignore me! I will bash your brains in-

PALADIN: SIR!

My Paladin socks him in the chest and he falls down unconscious.

PALADIN: I will fight you in a minute.

thrilling new au scenarios for your otps
  • I lost my little sibling in IKEA and I need your help finding them
  • I work at the animal shelter and you always come in to pet the cats when you’re sad
  • “Oh so you’re the camp counselor my little sibling keeps talking about”
  • We both have friends who party too hard and we keep running into each other in the bathroom while we hold their hair back
  • We showed up at a book club meeting but we’re the only people there who are not interested in Nicholas Sparks
  • We both signed up for an adventure cycling class and we’re the slowest people so we always end up biking together at the back
  • I work at Chuck E. Cheese and your sibling is having a huge birthday party
  • Your RA almost caught your illegal cat but I convinced them that it was just me meowing
  • I have a service dog and you’re failing this class because you just stare at it instead of taking notes
  • Our little siblings are on rival sports teams and I’ve made it my life goal to cheer louder than you
  • Someone gave me a fake phone number and it’s actually yours
Modern Day Hogwarts!AU

Originally posted by rose-wexsley

  • Oh my GOD being a Witch/Wizard in the 2010-2017 era would be so much fucking fun I swear I’ve never wanted to be a modern witch more than I do now
  •  Imagine every Friday night to celebrate the weekend, whatever year you’re in has a battle of the bands tradition, where everyone gathers in the Hufflepuff common room to rock tf out.
  • Pureblood student’s learning muggle music and instruments and LOVING it.
  • Every person in the year having mad hangovers the next day, and being dragged to the Quidditch pitch. All of the older students who attended the battle the previous night would all be dying, some of them even conjuring their own potions in an attempt to stop their hangovers.
  • FUCKING FIRST/SECOND YEARS DABBING 
  • “10 points to Ravenclaw” *AGGRESSIVELY DABS* 
  • If you weren’t in Hufflepuff yourself, the Hufflepuffs would be so fucking annoying. In EVERY SINGLE HOUSE EVENT they would all be chanting this song. (Even better if there was a Hufflepuff vs Slytherin Quidditch match and all the fucking Hufflepuff’s start shrieking the snake part)
  • I’m convinced there would be a Wizarding equivalent to social media apps like vine, instagram etc. Imagine the fucking vines that would be made through the school year im dyigreqdasiuf
  • Some Ravenclaw students using the room of requirement as a gym, because they know not only the importance of a healthy mind, but a healthy body too. Some Gryffindor students tagging along too when they notice what they’re up to, interested in muggle ‘leg day’, as they call it.
  • Piercing’s getting banned but most students being like lol fuck ya, wearing nose rings, septums etc all the time without fail.
  • Skater kids would enchant their skateboards to be able to hover, riding them in the corridor to their classes. Some teachers like Professor Longbottom would let it slide, others such as Filch wouldn’t be as forgiving.
  • Voldemort would become a meme.
  • He would definitely be a meme oh my god I am CONVINCED of this
  • In the History of Magic studies, the selected teacher would be expressing how dangerous and fearful the Dark Lord had once looked, one of the Slytherin students yelling out, ‘He doesn’t even have a bloody nose?! Dark Lord my arse.”
  • Muggle born students would take their pureblood friends to Muggle music festivals like Glastonbury and Reading Leeds, and they would go OFF. 
  • Wizards/Witches enchanting their camping tents so it’s like a small cabin, so it wasn’t uncomfortable to sleep in after a long day of seeing all the bands.
  • Kids who stay over the Christmas holidays would so stay up and play beer pong for New Years- all the Ravenclaws using advanced magic to cheat.
  • In Charms class, the students in their last year would do the mannequin challenge, making objects levitate while someone records it all.
  • Gryffindor students being annoying little fucks and trying to see how many teachers they could get to dab over the year. This turns into an annual house event for students, Slytherin always winning.
  • For Halloween all the older students enchanting their image to look like professors, which may become problematic through the day.
  • Hufflepuffs coming to class stoned, but never get told off for it. Sure, the odd point or two will be taken away if it’s that obvious, but those little shits always get away with it. Bonus points because their common room is so close to the kitchen.
  • If you haven’t heard this song before, I believe the Gryffindor would change the lyrics to “Gryffindor sound, we aint fucken around, fuck our classes man so we keep it underground, cause potions each day got me feeling like shit but it’s all worth while when the weekend hits.”
  • Slytherin students playing odds on, getting their Gryffindor mates to jump into the black lake to see the giant squid. 
  • Muggle borns taking their pureblood friends to rugby/hockey/soccer games, and them not having a fucking clue what’s going on.
  • KIDS IN THE CHOIR USING THEIR FUCKING FROG’S TO DO DUBSTEP AND TRAP BEATS FUCK 
  • Students using Snapchat to record small snippets of Mandrakes screaming then slow it down- Professor Longbottom finds this hillarious.

    FEEL FREE TO ADD TO THIS LET ME SEE WHAT YA’LL GOT
BTS as things I’ve done Pt. 2

Seokjin: Told my friend a really bad pun so she blocked me on Facebook for two days.

Yoongi: Walked an entire cross-country race because I couldn’t be bothered to run.

Hoseok: Screamed so loudly when I was playing a horror game at night that my dad ran in thinking I was being attacked by an intruder.

Namjoon: Dropped my mum’s cup of tea and then dropped mine when I went to pick up hers.

Jimin: Had to wait with the bags on my own while the rest of my class went on a rollercoaster because I was too short to ride.

Taehyung: Almost got hit by a bus because I was chasing a butterfly and wasn’t paying attention to my surroundings.

Jungkook: Got my phone taken away in class for looking at memes instead of doing work.

Glitch in the matrix moment!

I’m not sure if this can count as a glitch because I’m still very new to the town I’m currently living in and this could just be a case of me misidentifying things in the dark. That said, at the time it freaked me the hell out. 

I was driving home from yoga class the other day, and it was about 7:30 pm so it was pretty dark. I always count the street signs before I hit my street, there are four of them, so I’m pretty sure I didn’t just make a wrong turn. 

Anyway, so I get to the street that I live on, make a right like always… and the street I find myself on isn’t mine. I’ve never even seen it before. It sounds weird to say, but somehow it didn’t even feel like it belonged, like it was a road from a different city entirely. 

I ended up getting myself turned around, and got back home like normal, and I’ve just been thinking about it since. I have a pretty active imagination, so it’s entirely possible I just made a wrong turn and subconsciously embellished the experience, but I still thought it was worth sharing. Either way it was some @sixpenceee shit. 

the signs as things my teachers have said

Capricorn- “No, Ronald Reagan stays here. He’ll be fine." 
Aquarius- "I’m pro banning veganism.”
Pisces- “I bought everyone Rubbermaid for Christmas.”
Aries- “I make juggling look easy, but it’s not." 
Taurus- "I’m grumpy because some bozo just hit me in the head with a paper airplane." 
Gemini- "Not to be rude, but I really don’t care.”
Cancer- “If someone drops a nuke I’m running towards it." 
Leo- "My favorite comedian is Donald Trump." 
Virgo- "I miss my ex’s dog more than I miss my ex." 
Libra- "This is history class, not feelings class." 
Scorpio- "Canadians don’t have heritage." 
Sagittarius- "I don’t mean to roast you, but that was really bad.”

Keith’s Galra DNA

So this is a long one, but I think it’s important.

This will go in the “Headcanon” category. If you want to take this idea and expand upon it, please do! Tag me so I can see what you create! And HERE are my other headcanons!

I was sitting in a science class, thinking about Voltron, as you do. And a theory came up and hit me out of nowhere.

Now, I’m no biology major. But we’re talking about a show with giant space robot lions forming to make a giant space robot man piloted by an escaped prisoner with a magic/tech arm and four teenagers. I don’t think scientific accuracy is our main concern.

We know Keith is part Galra. We just don’t know how much. A lot of people are going for the 75/25 split in favor of human, because of how he looks. This is called phenotype - how our genes are expressed outwardly. But phenotype is determined by dominant and recessive genes. The genotype is what the DNA is actually made of.

With that in mind, you can have a 50/50 split in favor of Galra, with human being all dominant. With all the aliens out there that are even vaguely human-looking (with face structure, body structure, etc), it seems like human-like traits seem to be dominant in this universe’s genome. And we see Keith having human traits in the dominant form - dark hair, dark eyes. So we can think that most, if not all of Keith’s Galra DNA is in the recessive form in the genotype. It’s there, we just don’t see it. It could even be a 75/25 split in favor of Galra instead of human, but all be hidden. This is why some children look so much like one parent and almost nothing like the other.

So now that we’ve got the science out of the way, let’s talk about the Blade of Marmora episode and get some theories going.

Imagine Keith’s blade triggering the Galra DNA in his system, pulling it from genotype to phenotype. All the Galra traits were there, but they were all in the recessive form. The magic purple flash changed them all from recessive to dominant. That’s not exactly how our DNA works, but we also have this quintessence stuff that turned him a bit purple? We’re talking about alien biology, cut me some slack.

But this switch wouldn’t happen instantly (like we all wanted and made edits of). It would take time for the biology to catch up.

And that’s the transformation we wanted.

Imagine Keith getting super hungry, his body craving the nutrients to grow ears, claws, a new set of teeth, maybe a tail. With all the hand-to-hand combat he does, he must burn a lot of calories already. He goes to each meal eating three bowls of food goo, begging Hunk to make something with a lot of calcium because he’s so hungry. But once his body has stored up enough, the hunger disappears. He starts to feel nauseated. Who knows what a Galra diet entails, but it’s certainly not food goo.

Imagine him waking up to find that his body is itching from starting to sprout a fine layer of purple hair. He tries to shave it off his face, but it grows back by the end of the day (I mean, come on, they have to have razors on the castleship. There’s no way all of them stay so cleanly shaven, even if you go to the extreme and only count Shiro and Coran growing facial hair).

As his ear biology shifts, his hearing goes out of commission for a while. He tries to read lips, and it works pretty well, but you can’t read lips over an intercom through the Lions. The same thing happens with his eyes. The corners of them start to turn yellow, and his vision blurs as his actual eye is changing.

His jaw would start to ache like getting wisdom teeth, except for his entire mouth, until one day while he’s brushing them in the morning, they start to fall out. Depending on how different Galra bone structure is, he could even be incapacitated for a few days. We never see what a Galra foot looks like, or if their skull structure is different for the ears. He might even grow to a more Galra height, making him even more hungry.

I imagine that he would stay vaguely human-like. He wouldn’t change into an Ulaz-looking Galra, but a much more human-looking Galra. Short for a Galra, tall for a human, and much more human facial features. He’d keep his iconic mullet (even it turned just a tad bit more purple), his gloves would accentuate the aesthetic of claws, he’d even be able to master the very annoyed Galra snarl with the sharp teeth poking out. He would still look like Keith.

To end on a happy note, imagine the entire Voltron team being there for him during this transformation. Hunk would make him the most nutrient-packed meals he can manage, making sure to blend them up into a smoothie so his teeth don’t hurt. Pidge would dive into the science behind it, and even though Keith doesn’t fully understand, it’s somewhat comforting to know that someone does. Lance would absolutely be the personal cheerleader, always talking about how cool it is to have a Galra on their team and all the advantages it brings. Shiro would not only be the King of Moral Support but also help with the physical aspects. He’d train with Keith every day to help him adjust to the new Galra body. Coran would spout the history of Galra before Zarkon started taking over the universe, telling him about their culture and all the good things about them. And after a long period of giving him the cold shoulder, Allura would finally apologize. She’d take great strides to mend the relationship, even going so far as to do research into where his mother may have gone because she knows what it’s like to lose parents. And while that’s not directly helping him with the physical pain, it’s giving him very good peace of mind.

TL;DR: If Keith is going to have a more Galra form, it would be a much more gradual and painful change than just *poof* Galra. And everyone, even Allura, would be happy to help him with it.

Nurseydex & Acting Class

Eyoooooooooooooooo, the CP Resident Shakespeare Ho/Theater Major is back with more shamelessly using these characters as a means to talk about my major Nurseydex Antics!

As anyone who follows me knows by now, I’m a theater major. Dex and Nursey are comedy gold, and the thought of them working with any of the texts I’ve worked with is just DELIGHTFUL.

(Click here and here for my other Shakespeare Ho/theater major posts)

So without further ado!

  • Dex needs and art credit. Just one more fucking art credit. But his schedule is insane and there’s only one he can take this semester
  • it’s an acting class
  • He doesn’t want to do it. Mostly because his boyfriend will be I N S U F F E R A B L E
  • But he just wants to get this over with so he registers and just waits for Nursey to find out
  • Nursey is delighted. And registers for that class, too.
  • “YOU DON’T NEED ANOTHER ART CREDIT, DEREK!” “Dude, you really think I’m gonna miss this?”
  • Dex doesn’t really know what to expect going in, but he definitely wasn’t expecting the prof (let’s call him Casey) to be this hot middle aged guy who dresses like Indiana Jones and lives in a cabin and recites Shakespeare to trees
  • (we’re talking Adventure Indy, not Professor Indy)
  • (what no I’m not basing him on my prof Kerry who is also currently directing me in Julius Caesar why would you think that)
  • Nursey and Casey hit it off because Casey is this great mix of Passionate and IDGAF and Nursey wants to be him when he grows up
  • Dex’s main reaction to him is “?????????” until he starts talking about his cabin in the woods and then they bond over Practical Shit like fixing window panes and Nature
  • (the rest under the cut because this always happens my posts are always long af)

Keep reading

little kids will really believe anything you tell them.

when i was in pre k (4-5 y/o) we had some guest speaker talking to us about who knows what and some kid in my class asked her when her birthday was.

she was a much older woman so she probably disliked her birthday and didn’t want to share the actual day, so she answered “Everyday is my birthday.” and i shit you not after the initial couple of seconds of shock that hit our little baby brains, we all just gradually started singing happy birthday, because clearly if every day is your birthday (which is TOTALLY possible [/sarcasm]) then she must have a birthday that day too!!!! how could we possibly disrespect her by not singing the happy birthday song to her on her birthday?!!

and that was it, that was how easy it was to convince us of that.

so yeah don’t try to tell me your young child can’t possibly understand my gender. if an entire class of 4-5 year olds are immediately willing to believe that a woman’s birthday is every day of the year then surely they can understand that a person can have a gender that’s something other than “boy” or “girl”

ch. 1

Bad Habits || Jaebum

Originally posted by jjaenyoung

(THIS GIF IS SO HOT LIKE !!!!!!)

Reader (you) x Jaebum

Word Count: 1398

Warnings: none :)

note: i re-wrote this chapter i think 12321 times and idk if i’m completely satisfied with it BUT HERE IT IS! THE FIRST CHAPTER OF MAFIA!JB. hope you guys enjoy it and yeah…. happy reading and take care! -admin


Nighttime had always been the time when the demons came out to play; to bring out the worst in some people.Others may describe the night as downtown being lit up by the neon colors of the clubs and bars, shining on the rain-kissed sidewalks. However, in the night, I could be anybody and no-one would care who I really was.

My heels clicked on the sidewalk as I pulled my jacket closer to my body. As I passed by people, I observed their cheerful behavior and smiled. It reminded me of home of when I used to hang around my friends, laughing my head off like how these people were. However, moving to Korea alone was the result of my smile fading away. I wish I had friends here who I could go out with at night to bond over a drinks or share stories of our past. But all of them were at home and I was alone.

Keep reading

Height AUs
  • “I told you  even though I’m short, I’ll still beat your ass if you dare touch my friend again. Now, look at where we are. I hope you know how to pack a punch, fucker.” 
  • Person A being as tall as a giraffe, at least as Person B says, moving all of B’s favorite foods up to the very top shelf until the shorter apologizes for being “mean.” Bonus: If Person B attempts to get back their stuff by climbing on a chair, but fall. Luckily the not, that mad nor mean, Person A catches them. 
  • I’m the cute pastel kid in our rather cliché relationship as the jock and the flower kid, but you’re a pansy and I’ll knock that asshole’s teeth out for you sweetheart. “Let me know if they keep bothering you after this one, eh?”
  • You’re so tall they wouldn’t let you do the school play because they already built the set and you don’t fit through any of the doorways… I’ll get you a bouquet anyways if you’d like sweetie?
  • We came to the shower to have a fun time, but you hit your head on the the shower head and I’m laughing uselessly as you curse at the piece of bathworks jutting from the wall, I love you.
  • We’re vampires that were both changed together, and consequently buried together. You’re right next to me in your coffin, but because you’re so much taller I know you’ve already dug up to the surface. Will you please help me, I can hear you giggling up there you know.
  • “I swear to fucking god, will you please just put your head down a little bit you asshole, I’m trying to take vital notes and I’m failing this class, and woah… what’s your number because you’re hot and even though I’m a shithead, I want to take you out.” 
  • I’m not short, I’m average height, for your information… fanfic writers.
{Special} College!AU Bambam
  • major: biochemistry 
  • minor: took film for a semester and then dropped it when the teacher disagreed with his opinion on dr. dolittle being the best comedy of all time 
  • sports: quote on quote “what’s the point of sports when i burn calories with all this swag” 
  • clubs: chemistry club, tried to join a frat but jb made sure that did NOT happen
  • when people first meet bambam they’re like “you’re a fashion major? a english major? a theater major? a,,,,,,,,,,art major???” and he’s like “noooo im not good at art and writing, im good at BLOWING THINGS UP” aka he’s a science major
  • nd he’s like,,,,,,pretty good?? like he’d be better if he ACTUALLY studied 
  • because when he does he ends up doing really well,,,,like on tests if he gets his hands on someone else’s notes and spends at least 2 hours reading through them he gets by with like a 90% without even trying TOO hard
  • the problem is,,,,,,,,,,,he never does that. he never studies. he gets swept up in campus drama or parties or his own personal relationships and stuff 
  • and in lab he’s a headache for the poor teacher because his questions always stray from the topic at hand and go “if i put chemical x and chemical y in water at the same time i could theoretically make something strong enough to burn through skin right??????” and the teacher is like “yes but that’s not-” and bambam is like “where’s jinyoung i gotta get him back for hitting me over the head with one of his big ass ‘political’ textbooks” 
  • and the teacher just has their head in their hands and the class is laughing and it’s just like,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,bambam,,,,,,,,,are you seriously interested in a career in science??? 
  • but in a way bambam doesn’t really know what he wants?? he’s a creative person with a good fashion sense and he’d fit so well into the art community but he like doubts his skills ?? even though it never seems like it
  • he’s always internally hard on himself and he’s convinced the only way he can maybe prove he’s good is if he gets a successful job as a doctor or engineer
  • but at the same time does he really want to do that for a living??? like it’s fun to experiment but classes that deal with math and theory are kind of boring to him
  • but bambam just keeps it to himself,,,,,he doesn’t want anyone to know he’s worried and maybe that’s why he distracts himself with gossip and parties and oh my god taehyung hooked up with who?? oh hyuk is throwing a party?? 
  • and you’re familiar with bambam from the first day you start your work study as a TA to the chemistry professors lab program because all the students there have their coats on and their goggles and their notebooks
  • and bambam is sitting there with what looks like a labcoat that is bright green instead of the standard white, his name sewed in cursive on the pocket, and goggles with stars bedazzled on the side
  • and he’s the only with bright blonde hair and dangling earrings and when he raises his hand the teacher lets out the biggest sigh you’ve ever heard in your life
  • before turning to you and he’s like “you have one job. take care of that one.”
  • ‘that one’ is of course, none other than bambam
  • and lab happens two days a week and those two days a week are straight up Teasing from bambam on your part
  • from the second you introduce yourself to his group, bambam goes “i’d much rather learn from you than that old grumpy professor,,,,,,,,you’re cuter (;”
  • and his greasy cheesiness at first off-puts you but somehow you find yourself falling into it
  • and as you’re leaning over his shoulder to correct some of his notes he goes “ahhh,,,,my heart might explode with you so close to me~”
  • and you roll your eyes but like,,,,,,,,,,,it’s also kinda cute
  • having someone’s attention and being around someone who is so open with their feelings like it’s nice like who doesn’t like attention
  • but also the teacher loves you because bambam has focused his energy onto you and not onto asking him what kind of atoms make someone tall and someone short
  • but,,,,,,that all changes when the science department gets a new lab technician, a tall and handsome recent graduate nichkhun  
  • who from the first day is very sweet and helpful,,,,reminding you to roll your sleeves up when you get near the burner
  • and asking you if you’ve eaten before lab start 
  • and bambam notices this because he’s Nosy and Mischievous ,,,,,,,and he does not let you live it down
  • all of his flirtatious little come-ons turn into teasing you about nichkhun and how ‘cute’ you’d look together and how much he thinks his hyung likes you
  • and nichkhun just brushes all of it off,,,,,,because he’s older than you and he’s your colleague. both of you don’t talk outside of the lab
  • but bambam think it’s the funniest thing ever to keep trying to pair the two of you together  
  • but one day he goes a bit,,,,,too far,,,,,,you’re all sitting around the table and you’re helping someone else in bambam’s group figure out the equation needed to change the temperature into kelvin when you hear bambam call over nichkhun
  • and nichkhun gives everyone a friendly smile and of course one to you as well but bambam nudges nichkhun and is like “hyung,,,,,,,,your staring is obvious~ when will you two date? have you exchanged numbers?”
  • and you’re trying to help someone so you’re like “bambam, not now”
  • but it goes completely over his head and bambam is like “ill get their number for you hyung, you interested?” and you slam the pencil you’re holding down and you’re like “bambam. stop.” and nichkhun is like “bambam, really we are just acquaintances” 
  • and bambam is looking at you, your pissed off expression and he’s like “ok,,,,,,fine.”
  • and you go back to helping the student and bambam doesn’t speak to you and you don’t speak to him 
  • you try to tell yourself not to think about it because like you don’t care about nichkhun,,,,,,what bothers you is the fact that bambam had always been so sweet and affectionate toward you in the beginning
  • telling you how much he likes your eyes, staring at you when you were working with the burner, even poking your cheek with the eraser of his pencil because he claimed the sound of surprise you’d make was cute
  • but ,,,,,,,, now with him always pushing this other guy onto you like it makes you realized that perhaps all of that ‘flirting’ was really just a part of his personality, he’s just that person who teases people without having real feelings for them
  • and you had never been comfortable with openly coming to terms with the fact that your liking for bambam had turned into a bit of a crush,,,,,,maybe partially because he’d be so interested in you but also,,,,,it’s hard not to fall for someone so outspoken. so unique
  • with his tall, slender body,,,,sharp jaw,,,,,,,,mesmerizing gaze,,,,,,how his lips look partially open in concentration,,,,,,,how his laugh is loud,,,,,how he’s silly but also so??????? gorgeous 
  • like how could he be sitting there looking like a prince from the cover of a novel to dabbing every time the teacher says the word “ethanol” 
  • but it’s obvious with the way he was totally ok with the idea of you and nichkhun,,,,,,,that those compliments and his flirting was all just a way of him killing his boredom in class
  • so when you return to lab the following week, you don’t even spare him a glance. you think instead about what you’re going to do later,,,,,,,,and you get a text from a friend asking if you’d want to go on a double blind date with them
  • and you peek at bambam whose happily laughing with someone from another group and you reply that sure, you’ll go
  • the date is in some cafe half a mile off campus and you don’t know if you’ve even put ‘effort’ into your outfit tbh you just want a distraction
  • and your friend is mindlessly telling you about this class they’re taking on portuguese film when you’re approached by two guys,,,,,,one you know is totally your friends type so you let them go off and start chatting
  • the other one seems as awkward as you are about this situation,,,,he’s quite tall for what he says his age is and his black hair is cut in a kind of mushroom style with his bangs falling in front of his face but he seems nice,,,,,,,,,
  • and you tell him your name and he goes in a bit of a high voice, “im yugyeom!”
  • and your friend and their date are completely hitting it off as you and yugyeom sit in the corner sipping chocolate latte’s in silence until he asks what your work study is about and you tell him about the lab
  • and yugyeom stops and then tilts his head and he says your name outloud and you’re like yes? and he’s like and you’re the TA for chem lab,,,,,,,,,,,,,,then you must know my best friend!!!
  • and you’re like ????? who is it and he’s like “bambam!”
  • and the straw kind of falls out of your mouth but you regain your composure and you’re like “ah- yes i do” and yugyeom is all smiles and in your head you’re like change the subject change the subj-
  • “you’re the TA, he’s actually talked about you a loooooot!!”
  • and you’re like wait excuse me what now
  • and yugyeom is tapping his chin with his finger and he’s like “he mentioned that he was doing even worse in lab since you came along,,,,he already doesn’t concentrate but he was like like ‘yugyeom i couldn’t even take a single thing down i kept wanting to look at them’ it was so funny, actually hasn’t he asked you out??????”
  • and you’re sitting there with your jaw practically on the floor
  • and yugyeom is like “are you on this blind date because you didn’t like him back or did that loser never ask you?”
  • and he’s asking it jokingly but you look down at your hands and blink because wait,,,,,,,,,,bambam talked about you to his bestfriend????? he told his bestfriend,,,he ,,,,,,liked??? you????
  • and yugyeom is like “hey- are you ok?” and you get up and you’re like “yugyeom you’re nice and all but i-”
  • and he grins and waves his hand in front of his face like “i get it. by the way bambam is probably in the library right now, jaebum forced him to go and stay there. forced him or gave him ten bucks something like that~”
  • and you look over at your friend and yugyeom is like “don’t worry, ill take care of it ^^” and you’re like,,,,,,,ok thank you so much
  • and you don’t know why but you can’t even walk properly, your excited because the thought of,,,,,,,,,, “he likes me,,,,,he likes me,,,,,nichkhun was just a joke,,,,,,but why,,,,,,,,does he like me? he must,,,,,,,,maybe,,,,,”
  • and you can’t believe it but you’re running, trying your hardest not to bump into student on their way back and forth from classes
  • and you get to the library,,,,,but it’s closing and you try to tell the librarian you just have to see if someone is still there and she’s like “no one is here, go” and you’re like,,,,,,,standing there defeated
  • until you feel someones hand on your shoulder
  • and you turn and bambam is there, notebook under his arm and a smile on his face and he’s like “what are doing here TA?”
  • and you’re like “i,,,,,,,,” but you freeze up and you’re not sure what to say because well you were kind of standoffish to him for a while
  • and he seems so fine just smiling here in front of you that you find yourself doubting what yugyeom told you like how can you even trust yugyeom like you just met him on some stupid blind date what if he didn’t even know bambam what if this was all-
  • but you don’t have to say anything because bambam sheepishly scratches his neck and is like “i wanted to find you and tell you something by the way”
  • and you’re like “oh,,,,,?”
  • and bambam flicks his eyes to look into yours and you’re like holy shit his lashes are so pretty and long what,,,,,,,but bambam intentionally lowers his voice and is like
  • “i was really childish to keep teasing you and nichkhun hyung. im sorry i made both of you uncomfortable.” 
  • and you stop for a second because ok you kinda were expecting that confession but also your heart warm a bit because it’s nice to see him reflect on his mistake 
  • and you play with your fingers but ofc you’re like “it’s ok,,,,,,,but why did you keep pushing it? the one i like isn’t nichkhun,,,,,,,”
  • and you’re shyly blushing now a bit and bambam gives a nervous chuckle and he’s like 
  • “i thought you’d be into guys like him! you know,,,,,,guys who are actually going places with their life. you’re definitely not into losers like me.”
  • the words make you look up in shock because bambam has always been this mr. confidence to you and ,,,,,,,did he just call himself a loser??
  • and the usual bambam who stands tall, chest out with a gleaming grin on his face is now hunched over, hair in his eyes as he speaks in embarrassment
  • and you’re like “is that what you think of yourself?” and bambam coughs a bit because he’s never,,,,,,,really,,,,,,,,,told anyone,,,,,,but he just shrugs and is like “kinda,,,,,,you’ve seen my lab grades. im not a genius - im not getting a job as easily as someone as nichkhun,,,,,”
  • now his voice is breaking a bit,,,,and you’ve never seen this side of him because you’ve always only know the vibrant bambam whose popular on campus for dabbing during lectures or getting the most likes on his instagram or hell being that kid at the party who drew a mustache on the president of the college’s portrait 
  • you never knew there was this much self criticism within him and you put your hand out, pulling him forward so you can wrap your arms around his waist
  • and it shocks bambam, he drops the notebooks he was holding and he kind of hesitates with the warm feeling of your body pressed against his
  • and he’s like “it’s ok - p-please don’t pity me-”
  • and you muffle your words and he has to bend his head to hear
  • and you look up and you’re like “,,,,,,you may not be a genius but you’re not a loser bambam,,,,,,,,you’re such an open and lovely person,,,,,,,you have so much about you that people adore and are jealous of,,,”
  • bambam’s eyes widen a bit and he just chuckles and he’s like “no one is jealous of me-”
  • and you’re like “you’re wrong!! not a lot of people can be as friendly and as social as you without being fake or mean about it. you’re genuine with people,,,,,,,you put yourself out there and don’t show that you’re hurt,,,,you’re so strong i wish i could be like that too,,,,,,”
  • somehow you picture the bambam that you first met, who maybe your teacher didn’t like all that much, but who made the class laugh. who made the people around him happy.
  • no one had known he was harboring this look on himself and it hurt your heart to think you were too selfish in your thoughts to think of the other reason as to why bambam might have tried to push nichkhun toward you,,,,,,,,
  • you never imagined he could feel like he wasn’t good enough
  • and bambam hears you sniffle a bit you can’t believe you’re crying but imagining the smiles he’d have to fake or the thoughts that haunted him it makes you so sad
  • and you feel his warm finger press against your cheek, wiping the small tears that come down
  • and he’s like “i never thought someone as perfect as you would be jealous of me,,,,”
  • and you swallow and you’re like “i’m jealous, it’s true but that openness about you,,,,,,it makes me like you so so so much too”
  • this catches him off-guard once again and bambam let’s you go and points to his face in shock again and he’s like
  • “you like me?”
  • and you’re like “yes, which is why i would get pissed even more when you were like nichkhun this nichkhun that like i don’t like him dummy i like YOU”
  • blinking back in confusion bambam straightens his back and he’s like “huh,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,i can’t believe i beat hyung,,,,”
  • you roll your eyes and you’re like “is that really what you’re thinking about now?”
  • and bambam is like heY nichkhun is hard to beat like his has a face, money, a C A  R and you’re like oh my god and you have the face too, plus the personality 
  • and bambam raises an eyebrow and suddenly you can feel he’s back to his trickster self because he goes “are you sure you’re not just saying that because i complimented you so much?”
  • and you swat his arm you’re like “why,,,,,were those compliments a lie?” and bambam is like nO to be honest i should have laid it on more thick like when you would bend over to get something you dropped and i would be like hey that line of you-
  • and you put your hand over his mouth and you’re like don’t start
  • and he just grins under your hand and gives your palm a kiss and you’re like bAMBAM and he’s like what i can do that now because,,,,,,we’re gonna date right
  • you pretend to think about it for a bit and bambam is like omg don’t tell me you’re gonna reject me after all that c’mon ill get on my knees
  • and he literally does get on his knobby knees and you’re like bAMBAM GET UP and he’s like no ill stay like this till you say yes
  • and you’re like yeS YES fine yes i was going to say yes anyway
  • and bambam dabs because hell yeah you’re his s/o now
  • and you want to smack your face with your hand but you just settle for dabbing along with him beCAUSE WHY NOT YOUR BAMS OTHER HALF NOW YOU GOTTA MEME
  • amazingly the day is a lab and nichkhun comes by to hand out some gloves and bambam leans over and he’s like “hyung,,,,,,you lost your chance with the hottest person on campus because guess what they’re ALL MINE now” and he turns to wink at you
  • and you hide behind your notebook because gfhaljfghkfjsla he’s so corny
  • and nichkhun just grins and pats bambam’s shoulder and is like “if you need to borrow my car to take your sweetheart out for a date - just let me know”
  • and bambam is like OMG REALLY and nichkhun is like lmao no not really are you kidding i wouldn’t trust you with my water bottle i am not trusting you with my car
  • but you and bambam do have a first date,,,, a crazy one because bambam thinks it’s the brightest idea in the world to take you to a club
  • but it’s like why not you might as well let loose with your boyfriend it’s a friday anyway
  • but wow bambam cannot hold his drink and when he dances it’s like long limbs everywhere
  • but it doesn’t matter because the whole night he keeps you near him and you guys get matching light-up necklaces and bambam gets a hold of the djays mic at some point just to scream out i really rEALLY like you y/n
  • and you’re once again hiding behind your cup but gosh he’s cute ok
  • at the end of the night you meetup with jackson and yugyeom who were also there and they help carry bambam whose stumbling everywhere and when you drop the boys off at the dorm
  • bambam is like “goooooodbye kisssssss” and you’re like this is a first date ,,,,,,,,,,, but bambam is puckering his lips and he looks so silly that you just do it
  • and jackson is like AYEEEEE and yugyeom just winks at you because your little secret about how this wouldn’t have happened without him spilling the beans is still,,,,,a secret
  • and you learn that dating bambam is a RIDE but it’s never ever boring and he’s so full of affection
  • and the best part is he is so damn open about it to the point where it can get really embarrassing really fast
  • like you’ll be sitting with the study group for biochem majors and you’re there to help bambam with any chem stuff and he just looks over as you’re solving a problem
  • and brushes his hand over your shoulder and he’s like “so,,,nice,,,,,,,so soft,,,,,,,your skin is always glowing i want to kiss it let’s go somewhere where i can kiss it all i wan-”
  • and you’re like packing up your books dragging bambam away by the ear going bYEEEEE to the rest of the group
  • and you scold him to not be so Vocal about his Desires
  • but bambam just whines and he’s like b U UUUUU T I llllllOO OOVeeee you
  • and you’re like yes i love you too but im not going to go down to the music building open the door and go “I REALLY WANNA MAKEOUT WITH MY HOT BOYFRIEND RIGHT NOW”
  • and bambam completely misses the point because he leans in and smirks and is like “is that what you wanna do? we can do tha-”
  • and you put your hand in his face and you’re like no we’re gonna study right now
  • jb thinks you’re a gift from God because you actually get bambam to study for his tests 
  • and ever since he started dating you his grades have gone up
  • even though he isn’t 100% sure this is the major for him,,,,,he feels like he excels at it and you’re always cheering him on and that makes him wanna work even harder
  • also the fashion majors keep asking you to ask bambam if he’d consider being a model for them and you’re like you can ask him yourself he’s a really sweet guy and they’re like omg no he’s too cool
  • and you wanna laugh because they don’t know how much of an ACTUAL dork your boyfriend is
  • just because he wears a leather jacket and brand-names doesn’t mean he doesn’t try to do horrible aegyo for you to buy him ice-cream like
  • also bambam is the king of social media, we all know this and his snapchat story is just full of him getting you to try out the filters with him
  • and his sister always snaps back that she doesn’t get what bambam did to deserve someone like you who puts up with him
  • and bambam is like “because they love me um???????” and you’re like OTL i do,,,,,,and his sister is always like i wanna meet you!!!! so i can tell you all of bambam’s childhood secrets!!! and bambam is like sis i will block u don’t test me
  • but he also loves her and he’s always texting you pictures when he’s out shopping because he’s like “should i get this for baby??? she’d like it right?????”  
  • but he ALSO sends pics of stuff and is like “i should get this for my mom”
  • you skyping his mom made bambam so nervous because he respects and loves her so much and he was like “ok ok ok if she doesn’t like you ill just have to,,,,,,,,dump you” and tbh you weren’t sure if he was joking or not the boy loves his family TO DEATH it’s soooo charming
  • but ofc his mom liked you and his sister liked you and bambam is like phew why did i worry you’re PERFECT so ofc they’d like you
  • jackson always comments on bambam’s couple ig posts of you guys as “lolololol my kids” and bambam is like im an adult and jackson is like “no you’re my son”
  • more on dork boyfriend bambam: when you two are passing by like a mirror or something he is like let’s stop and take a funny picture
  • and you either like poke each others face or stick your tongues out
  • and people are looking at you 2 like what in the world but you’re having fun
  • but don’t think bambam isn’t about that couple #aesthetic either like if you guys are wearing matching accessories there will be pictures taken. you guys get coffee together there will be pictures taken. you guys meet a cute puppy there will be pictures taken
  • and once you fell asleep with your head against his chest in a silent study hall and bambam took like a picture from above with his big hand around your shoulder and he captioned it something like ‘my sleeping beauty’ and jinyoung was like “take this down i report this for explicit pda content” and mark was like @jinyoung literally calm down
  • bambam over spoils you and you wish he’d stop but he kinda admits that he does it because he’s so scared of losing you for messing up he tries to compensate with presents
  • and you’re just like you have to hold his face and be like “you are never going to lose me, unless you do something really dumb. but i always want to be by your side”
  • and bambam nods, burying his face in your chest and it’s always a cute meaningful moment,,,,,,,,until you feel his hands on your butt and you’re like OK 
  • when the teacher finds out you’re dating bambam (which is pretty early on bambam literally is like ‘this is my s/o’ and points at you for the whole class) he’s like “are you sure? about him?” and you’re like listen grandpa he’s my delightful slightly loud but still endearing boyfriend and i am 100% sure he will never hurt me so let. it. go.”
  • bambam is the kind of boyfriend who tries to stay up with you when you study but falls asleep and when he wakes up he apologizes and buys you an expensive breakfast and gets you a stuffed animal all because he slept
  • like he’s so nice ????? how are people mean to him i don’t understand
  • tries to get you more into fashion and thinks couple looks are sorta tacky he’s more into couple themes. like all black ft gold or something and he knows his stuff 
  • your dates range from clubs, to cafes, to youngjae trying to teach the two of you how to play league and failing miserably, to expensive dinners because bambam is extra like that
  • couple spa days are a very big thing if you’re into that. if not, and you’re more an active person bambam will try sports for you. he might get hurt in the process, but for you - anything
  • you tried on some his rings and necklaces and stuff once and you were like “i wonder how heavy it would be if i put ALL of them on” you tried and it was heavy but bambam got a pic for insta
  • randomly buys you flowers and brings them to class and you can’t have flowers in the lab but you go outside of the lab and jump on him and cover him in kisses
  • and bambam always begs you to skip so you can go back to his dorm and ; ) but you’re like ,,,,,,,,,,,,no we have to go to lab
  • once you did say yes it was great and bambam was like i can’t believe you broke the rules and you were like it’s your fault. you and your super amazing face and pretty flowers 
  • bambam: whose prettier my face or flowers
  • you: flowers
  • bambam: im calling the Police 
  • recreates memes and sends them to you at like 2 am and you’re too tired to send anything back except a picture of kermit the frog on fire or something
  • match-made in heaven
  • yugyeom is still so proud of himself for making this happen. even if all he did was literally tell you bambam liked you on a blind date you were on with him which you agreed not to tell bambam because bambam would probably flip LOL

college!vixx (here) & college!bts (here) & college!seventeen (here)

find special college!jb (here), college!mark tuan (here) college!youngjae (here), college!jinyoung (here) & college!jackson (here)

find special college!amber (here)

find special college!wonho (here) , college!im (here), college!minhyuk (here), college!kihyun (here) , college!shownu (here) and college!hyungwon (here

and please look forward to more special college!aus!

(My) Favorite headcanons about Matt

  • Matt Holt is an absolute meme lord who can and will fuck you up if you talk shit about Star Wars, Star Trek or any cool Si-fi movies and stuff.
  • Believes in the moon landing and will fight anyone that doesn’t. He’s in a space program ready to go to the Kerberos moon, if he can get that far into space with his dad and teacher (teacher Shiro ftw,) then the moon landing was real, Consider yourself blocked and reported if you think the landing was fake.
  • Matt is the top student in all his classes. One time this kid tried to one up him in knowledge of science, and Matt shot him tf down because there’s no way in hell that’s he’s going down without a fight, and if he has a clear shot, he’s taking it without mercy.
  • Once got into huge trouble for hacking into computers to read top secret files to prove aliens are real. Shiro told him not too, but Matt hit him with that, “try and stop me” and Shiro knows that he cannot stop him. Matt is too powerful when it comes to finding the truth of aliens
  • Matt is so devastated when Katie tells him that people back on earth think the moon landing is still fake because of the supposed “pilot error” and they have no proof that they made it that far in space.
  • Shiro then has to comfort him. “Fuck the garrison”, “that’s right Matt, fuck the garrison”. “they fucking classified our information”, “they sure did.” “I’m gonna fucking document all of this”, “you do that matt.” “—and then shove it down their fucking throats”, “uh matt?” “—fuck them for tricking the world that I’m dead, I am very much alive thank you very much”, “you sure are matt, and I’m glad but please don’t go shoving your documents down their throats.”
  • Matt is just as much as a technology nerd as Pidge and he gets along well with all the other Paladins. Especially Hunk because then he, himself and Pidge can work together to do more things in the name of science

I like the fics where Derek or Stiles get jealous, but what about if everyone else assumes that they’re jealous or possessive, but they really don’t give a shit because they trust each other.

“Stiles did you see Derek’s chatting with that really hot bartender?”
“I hope he’s grabbing me another beer while he’s at it.”

“Derek where’s Stiles?”
“He’s got some overnight project for his astronomy class.”
“Isn’t that the one with that guy who keeps hitting on him?”
“Probably.”
“Don’t you care?”
“Nah.”

“Dude, did you see that hot mom jogging with Derek?”
“I’m really impressed that she can keep up with him, I know I can’t.”
“It doesn’t bother you?”
“No why would it?”

I’m just all about Stiles and Derek trusting each other and not getting jealous when someone else flirts with them because they know at the end of the day they’re going home together. 

The Pharaoh’s Cape

I just woke up and had an epiphany.

As cool and dramatic as Pharaoh Atemu’s scarf-cape is…

I never really felt it was accurate. (Yes, I know. “ACCURACY? In a show about CARD GAMES?”) It’s just, how many Pharaohs have you seen with a great flowing purple cape? Atemu’s father doesn’t even have one.

AND THEN IT HIT ME!! 
The color purple was always associated with royalty back in ancient times. This was because it was very, very, expensive to manufacture the purple dyes. Thus, only the very high class and royalty would be able to afford it. This was very prevalent in Ancient Rome and Ancient Egypt.

MY HEADCANNON: When it was made known that Atemu would become the new Pharaoh, Rome sent a tribute in the form of a grand purple cape…

Which Atemu wears on the day of his coronation.

Throw a book at my head? We'll see who has the last laugh.

So this happens back in freshman year of high school for me, about twenty years ago. Little bit of a back story, I was born with Neurofibromatosis, a genetic condition that causes tumor growth on nerve endings and a large list of other problems like early onset puberty, blindness, epilepsy, death ect.

I had this teacher who if you called her an ancient old hag you’d be being polite. For whatever reason she had it out for me I can only pin it down to her being a bully. Now I had been sick because of my medical condition and had action plans with the school as to not fall behind, the teacher knew of my condition because of this.

So one day I come into the classroom and there’s a depiction of me on the whiteboard with the words “tumor boy” above it….the teacher just shrugged and laughed, she had disclosed my medical condition to the entire class. I tell the principal, nothing. The guidance counselor nothing, my parents? Nothing. Nobody believes me. It’s my word against hers, so for now I let it go. I’m very patient so I know I’ll get another opportunity.

Another incident, she hits my hand with a ruler when I ask her to stop taunting me in front of the other students my medical condition is nobody’s business but my own. She tells the class I have brain tumors which is why my head is so large. She also points out that I have the in my feet again disclosing private medical information just to be a vile person. I again go through everyone, again nobody believes me.

So then I get a mild case of the flu, and miss about a week of school so I ask if I can bring a recorder to school to tape lessons to catch up it’s immediately put in my file for whatever reason she missed this meeting, still it’s in my file so she should know about the agreement. So now I know if she acts like a rancid bitch again her ass is mine, all I need is bait which pretty much just takes me showing up.

The very next day at school I’m sitting in class with the recorder taping in my bag, and she starts with her daily routine of asking someone to draw a picture of “me and all my tumors” on the white board, I again ask her to stop and this is where the book is thrown at my head with a loud thud followed by a profanity filled tirade about how terrible of a child I am.

It’s at this point I stop the recorder, and tell her exactly what I think of her and am then physically removed from the class and taken to the principals office, and I’m expelled.

Once I got home is when I showed my parents the tape, within twenty minutes we are back at the school playing it for the principal and vice principal threatening legal action. Needless to say my expulsion is lifted and she is fired on the spot just before retirement, losing her retirement money.

She even called me after and asked “why are you doing this”? I simply told her she did it to herself and hung up.