because she's written very differently I think

This Jellal in Ch. 531

(I’m taking yonkou’s translation here because it’s very close to the raw’s meaning. He didn’t say anything near “That’s what I like about you” like mangastream has translated them; even though he must have thought that deep down but no he didn’t say it out loud here.)

I think it’s very interesting and well-written how Mashima wrote Jellal in this panel, commenting on Erza’s trusting personality. This not only shows how well he knows her, but is also like a follow up to Ch 416 where Erza questioned her ability to trust in people again and Jellal assured her she could.

Jellal appreciates Erza’s trusting personality. He knows it’s her good quality. But he knows it’s a weakness of her too because she can be used by people with bad intention. He is really the one who has numerous and different 1st hand experience in facing this side of Erza to understand why such personality is good but can be bad for her own at times.

She trusted in him to lead her to escape the Tower of Heaven when they were child slave. But he had exploited her trust in his good nature to deceive her that she had won and he was willing to die along with her in the Tower of Heaven (I’m talking Ch. 93 if you didn’t catch it). Then Erza showed her trust in him again in the Nirvana arc. When Midnight tried to talk Jellal in joining them. When she offered to stay by his side even she didn’t know if they would become enemy again if he regained his memories. When he showed up 7 years later with his memories back and as a member of small guide formed with his former partner in crime, asking for her help in investigating the GMGs, she agreed without questions. Then during Tartaros arc, her trust in the former Chairman resulted in her capture by Tartaros, and led to her self-doubting at the end of the arc.

So when Jellal says Erza’s trusting personality is a weakness of her, he is really like speaking out of 1st hand experience and observation. But he doesn’t judge or diminish her because this side of her had made her suffer. Jellal acknowledges once again, like in Ch. 416, trusting is Erza’s good quality, with another knowing smile. He doesn’t tell Erza to change, to be more skeptical about people, a true display of his trust in and respect for her.  

I also really like how confident and honest Jellal is when speaking to Erza. He’s different from that Jellal who saw Erza as his light in Nirvana arc or that one who thought Erza was always right in GMG. He knows exactly where he stands beside Erza, not acting inferior to her, and is able to see Erza as Erza, strong but with weakness. This is character development.

Last I feel obliged to mention that this panel is perfect also because of his damn charming smile and that muscles under his tight turtleneck shirt.

QUEENS REC : list of wonderful and amazing Malec and Shadowhunters fanfictions' writers - PART 1

I wanted to make a fanfics rec for a long time but there are so many it’s impossible de choose ! I can’t. So instead, I’ve made a writer’s rec. A queens rec, because let face the truth: they are queens. All of them (and a few kings, probably. I still haven’t met you sorry).

We have so many talented writers in this fandom, it’s a blessing. I said it before but I’ll never stop saying it: thank you, you gave me back the love of reading.

Selecting only a few was heartbreaking. Please forgive me. You all deserve a crown. I’ll give you one, in time, I promise.


If you don’t know her work you’re really missing something. Her two fics are simply amazing !

She has a way to take us so deep in hers characters mind that is stunning. Hers fics are not only Malec center so everyone has a place and is very well studied. It’s invigorating ! She doesn’t leave anyone on side and even has interesting OCs.

How to save a family is really brilliant for that. My favorites are Maryse and Jocelyn, two astounding mother figures with all hers complexity. The case of Max is also a very interesting and emotional one. I’ll let you find out why.

The confrontation between Alec and his AU self in Never stand between two mirrors is worth reading ! Intense and funny moments guaranteed.

Her serie of prompts Spaces Between is also remarkable and offer the scenes and POV we deserve.

Never stand between two mirrors
How to save a family*
Spaces between (serie)*


Lucile has gold in her hands. Really. She’s one of the best autor I ever read. But you surely already knew that.

You’re caught as soon the first sentence and emerged only at the end, three hours later (for the short one). You haven’t drunk, eaten or moved between. You just read because that was the only think you could do. Maybe you live-tweeted to yell at her but that’s the only exception.

Yes, I’m a big fan and have literally no will-power when it comes to Lu’s fics. First I scream when I receive the email or see the post, then I drop everything I’m doing to go read it. And let me tell you : I regret nothing. I’m not disappointed. Ever.

She has already written so many fics and I didn’t even read them all (I know I’m a walking scandal, don’t remind me ! I live with the shame everyday) but if I’ll have to chose one, it will be without a doubt Bright Lights, Small Town. This fic is a masterpiece. A beautiful, so well-written original story with strong and deep characters. It’s Magnus’ POV and he is just so endearing and vulnerable that you want to protect him at all cost ! This fic is about family, friendship and love. It’s about grief, moving on and make choices. This fic is about finding a home and there is not a single thing I don’t like about it. It has touched me in a way I can’t described. Run for it if you haven’t.

To build a home (serie) : Bright Lights, Small Town and extras
Stars Aligned (serie) : And the oscar goes to and following
I see fire
Dead men no tales
Invictus


Basically you’ll need a blanket, severals hot chocolate (or tea), a lot of tissues, and a loving pet or a plush to get over of her AU fics.

I’m not kidding ! Paparazzi is the most painful fic I’ve ever read, and I’ve read a lot. My heart broke at each chap and there 17 of them so far. The last part of chap 1 of Addicted to you put me on the floor for hours and chapter two was a roller-coaster for my nerves, always promising the sweet candy of happiness and fluff only to take it away before you could even grab it. In summary, Alec is an idiot and Magnus needs a hug or vice-versa. They’re two idiots in love with each others but don’t realize or accept it and make us suffer for their ignorance or stupidity.

But like her writing is so good I’m willing to suffer, and so should you. When angst is well-written it becomes more bearable (do you see the auto-persuasion here?). So be warn but go for it anyway. She promised happy ending so what’s a few stabs in the heart ?

Paparazzi*
Addicted to you
My true love gave to me


Jackie. Where do I begin ?

Once again I think I don’t have to introduce you to Take me to church, or as we can call it : the longest slow burn ever made. I really hope I don’t. If I do let me ask you something: where you living in a cave without wifi ? That the only excuse I’ll accept.

Slow burn takes all its meaning here. I hope you have patience. Like a lot. No seriously. Love make people blind but at this point it just ridiculous and you just want to bump into the story and scream at this two idiots desperately in love with each others. And you know the worse ? You watch them fall in love. Both of them. So you know. Izzy knows. Jace knows. Catarina knows. Everybody knows. Except them of course.  And on  top on that you have cute Clace and Sizzy, a strong parabatai bond, a brilliant Max Lightwood, Ragnord and Cat as friends of the years but for each year, and a helpful Raj.

I’ve hesitated with Queen of roller-caster because damn I hope you have a good heart. I don’t know how mine survived. Jackie have a way to snap your happiness in one sentence, make you scream of fear the next one to finally made you melt of cuteness two second later. It’s incredible. Seriously my heart had beated so fast so many times while reading this fic ! But you feel so alive, it’s worth it.

And her writing is just a blessing. I don’t count the number of times I had to stop reading because a sentence was so beautifully written that I had to take a moment. There is talent here. This fic really has a particular place in my heart. It’s one of the most beautiful and powerful love story I had the chance to read.

Oh and Fools rush in is extra ! Very different, much more fun and lightly that TMTC but still with angst because it’s Jackie and she can’t help it.

Take me to church*
Fools rush in*
Complete me


I was about to post this rec but Sam posted chapter 17 of In the sin bin before I could and now I don’t think she deserve to be in it anymore…

Yes that chapter ruined me and I’m still pissed. Who’s else ? Raise your hands !

Who else was already on the floor because of the last part of chapter 16 ? Welcome to the club.

And did you see it coming ? No ?! Yeah me neither ! And do you know why ? Because that’s what Sam does ! She always find something to surprise us (or kill us in that case). You think it’ll be okay, they’re going to be happy and then BAM cliffhanger, everything falls apart. How many times did she do that in 17 chapters ? (It was rhetorical question don’t answer that. I don’t want to know). I’m talking about ITSB but chapter 13 of Home was the same. If you read it now you’ll just have to click on next chapter, we had to wait a whole day to find out ! Hearthless.

I’m yelling because that’s what I do but ISTB is a must-read and a fantastic original story. I didn’t know anything about hockey, it’s not really a famous sport in France and I’m the less sportive person you’ll ever met. But reading Sam’s games ? Jesus I hope you have a good heart and aren’t in a public area. It’s more than likely that you’ll scream (of joy and frustration).

But ISTB is not about just hockey. Is about incredible and deep characters. You’ll find in love with Max Lightwood, he has even less chill than Lu. You’ll find in love with Magnus and his suits, Alec and his bread (just kidding they have amazing personality too). You’ll watch them fall in love. Because ITSB is about love, but also about friendship, family, support and team up. ITSB is about taboo and fame, about press and blackmail, about finding yourself and fight in what you love and believe.

In the sin bin*
Home
Glimpses of Malec*

*those fics are not complete

fic editsHiding Place (ao3) by @alivingfire​ ​ - E, 365k

Louis never wanted a soulmate, didn’t really care for the whole Bonding thing at all, really. Enter Harry Styles, who’s wanted to be Bonded for as long as he could remember. With one fateful meeting in an X Factor bathroom, Louis gets a dagger on his arm and the realization that just because Harry is his soulmate doesn’t mean it’s mutual.
From the X Factor house to Madison Square Garden, from the Fountain Studios stage to stadiums across the world, Louis has to learn to love without losing himself completely, because someday his best friend will Bond to someone and replace Louis as the center of his universe. Meanwhile, Harry begins to think that maybe fate doesn’t actually know what it’s doing after all, because his other half has clearly been right in front of him the whole time. All he has to do now is convince Louis to give them a chance.
OR

the canon compliant Harry and Louis love story from the very beginning, where the only difference is that the love between them is literally written on their skin, and there’s only so much they can hide.

anonymous asked:

Few years ago, I spoke with my stepmother about how I felt isolated from my friends because I never got crushes. She commented that I would eventually, "unless you're one of those asexuals, which I don't think you are." At this point I had been certain for at least a year that I am aroace. Upon questioning she admitted she thought this because I like (well written) romantic scenes in movies. She seems very set in this. How do I explain that attraction is different from what I like in media?

I don’t know how helpful it is but I absolutely am always  reminded of violence when someone is like but you like smut or you love romances. Like people love murder mysteries but they definitely would hate it if their actual life turned into one. Not all media is wish fulfillment sometimes it’s a way to be safely involved in things that aren’t like your own life. Similar to people who love horror movies. 

umbrellatwin said:
i want to hear the explanation

(x)

i’ll try to keep this short but let’s start with the fact that everything that happens in this show hinges on rainbow dash saving fluttershy from their bullies as a kid and challenging them to a race to “defend fluttershy’s honor” in which she flew so hard that she created a giant rainbow explosion seen from miles away. if that’s not the start of a gay love story then i don’t know what is

it’s made explicitly clear that they were close as kids, but they don’t seem to be super close at the start of the series, with more focus put on rainbow’s friendly rivalry with applejack. the big shift comes with find a pet, which is actually… get ready for this… an episode about rainbow dash remembering how close she is with fluttershy! wow!! the lesson of this episode is clearly framed by rainbow dash as her realizing that there’s more to a good friend than someone who can go toe to toe with her physically

and sure enough, they’re suddenly inseparable throughout much of the rest of season 2, culminating with rainbow dash saving fluttershy from the changelings and kissing her on the nose in the finale which opened up my fucking third eye when it aired i tell you what

beyond that though i think they just tend to bring out the best in each other, when written well. they have some shared trauma from their childhood bullying and have basically both been dealing with that in their own ways for the rest of their lives. and i think they really get each other because of that, even if they seem very different at first glance. rainbow dash is often fluttershy’s biggest cheerleader, which gives fluttershy some more confidence and brings out rainbow’s earnest, compassionate side that the show’s writers forget about too often. and fluttershy is someone i think rainbow knows she doesn’t have to try so hard to impress–she can let her guard down around fluttershy even though she’s always trying so hard to look cool around everyone else. it’s a really great dynamic

which is why i spent a year of my life making a video game where they’re gay. thank you

To clarify my salt over the negativity towards acowar: it’s not as if I thought everything in this book was perfect, in fact, I’ll probably copy @abookandacoffee and make my own list of things that needed improvement. It’s just that I hate hate hate tumblrs brand of criticism that quickly goes from “this thing didn’t work for me for all of these valid reasons and here’s my textual evidence” to “this book and this author are trash and how could she do this to us and how dare she write her own characters in such a way.” And after acowar I went to my dash and saw some people who hated it so thoroughly that they legitimately think that they as fic writers can produce a better work?? And I was like, what, have you written and published 9 novels? Like what? it amazes me tbh, not only because there’s a world of difference between fic and canon but because I’ve never read a fic that I felt accurately stood in for canon. I have of course, seen some very legit criticism and meta on the book and that’s not what upsets me. What upsets me is needless negativity because an author failed to give you everything you expected.

and the vitriol directed at sarah also bothers me not only because I hate seeing women writers be vilified and told they don’t deserve the characters they created but also because what the author intended and who the author is as a person has no place in textual criticism.

And ultimately, acowar was a book I enjoyed immensely. Maybe I just have a better ability to ignore things I don’t like than most others, but I also think that for me, literary criticism is not based on how I might morally judge the actions of the characters and the narrative, but rather on thinking about how the pieces of the book work together, and if they are effective. Effective has many different definitions, but for fantasy romance genre fiction, which is what SJM writes, the effectiveness is really whether or not the reader enjoyed it and if there was a lot of emotional pay off (emotional pay off is the main goal of romance). AND I ENJOYED IT A HELL OF A LOT. I laughed and cried and screamed my way through acowar like I do for any of SJMs books. I felt emotionally fulfilled after. The way I feel after many a good romance or fantasy novel. And so to find so much of the fandom…not enjoying it really sucks. Not because it affects me but because I really wish that the fandom I love so much was satisfied.

And it’s fine if you aren’t. But I’m keeping needless negativity off of my blog and will probably begin metaing the shit out of this book this week.

Love the Way You Lie | Harry Styles

Love the Way You Lie (Part 2) by Rihanna

[masterlist]

This one-shot imagine was written in a different style than I usually write, so I hope it’s not too terrible! Let me know what you think! It took me a while to write this because I was very unsure about cheating Harry but I did it! Enjoy!

Love the Way You Lie | Harry Styles One-Shot Imagine

Requested by anonymous: Hi my love! Can I request a cheating imagine? He cheats on the missus but then begs her to stay when she try’s to leave?

[Harry. Missus.]

September 2015

One Direction had just finished the North American leg of their On the Road Again tour not too long ago and Harry decided to spend a week with his family back in Cheshire, which Y/N didn’t mind since Harry hadn’t been home in months, so she said she would wait until he came to London for the start of the UK leg of the tour since they had six shows in a row at the O2.

She had kept her self busy since he’s been gone, trying her best to throw herself into work. She had missed him terribly and even though there were iPhones, iPads, MacBooks to keep them in touch, in all honesty, it really didn’t help much at all. She craved his touch and missed his smile. She missed the way he would smirk when he said something profoundly brilliant and it made her tingle inside when he would place a kiss on her forehead and wrapped his arms around her body after they wore each other out.

But something was different the past couple of months and she couldn’t put her finger on why. His calls became less frequent, his texts were shorter and even the way he said ‘love’ and ‘baby’ had changed but then again it could just be the distance and she was overthinking every little thing again like she always does. She thought that maybe when he’s back in London things will be okay again and she would see that it was just all in her head.

A few days before the first show at the O2, she decided to call him. She hadn’t actually spoken to him since the day he returned to the UK, wanting to give him time with his family.

“Hello?” Harry’s sleepy voice came through her phone.

“Hi babe, are you coming to London before your first show?” She asked cheerfully as she sipped on her morning coffee.

“Mmm yeah, we need to rehearse the day before so probably then.” He yawned.

Her smile instantly faded, “Oh. You’re not coming any sooner?” 

“I don’t know yet love, we’ll see what happens… miss you though.” She heard him slowly say.

“I miss you too Harry.” She didn’t want to push him, knowing that there was enough on his plate.

“Have a good day at work okay?” She knew that he wanted to go back to sleep so she figured she’d let him.

“Okay thank you, tell your family I said hello!” She tried her best to sound happy even though it wasn’t how she was feeling.

After Harry hung up on Y/N, he checked his messages to see notifications from Gracie Carvalho and slightly smiled.

He met her in San Diego during the beginning of the North American leg and gradually started getting to know her. She was beautiful, funny, and charming. Did he like her? No. Was he attracted to her? Yes. She’s a Victoria Secret angel and there’s no denying that she’s gorgeous.

He loved Y/N, of course he loved her, she was everything to him but it had been almost six months since he had been able to touch her and Gracie… well Gracie was there and she was willing.

A year and half, that’s how long Harry and Y/N had been together. He had known Y/N for a total of two years and when he first met her, he knew she was special right away. He needed to get to know her, he was drawn to her and for six month he chased her and they fell in love. Y/N and him were great together; they had so much in common and she balanced him out, kept him grounded. He had never felt that way about anyone before and he had never been happier until a few months ago.

Y/N wasn’t happy when management pushed the five of them into a fourth tour with 80 shows. She was concerned for their health and wanted them to rest but of course, work is work. This is the life they signed up for when they became One Direction.

When Harry went to L.A. in the beginning of the year, Y/N was very upset. They fought a few times while he was away and he hated it. Harry wanted her to come with him but of course she had her own job and she couldn’t just abandon her friends and family to follow him around on tour, which he completely understood, so they tried to make it work.

He hated that she always said no when he offered to fly her out to where ever he was. He was getting really frustrated from all her rejections but then when she surprised him in Dubai, he was absolutely thrilled. He had missed her more than anything. But that happiness soon ended when they fought about the fact that he was going to L.A. for their two month break instead of going back to London.

For the first week and a half of his break, they argued almost every day. He knew that all she wanted was for him to come home but he explained to her that L.A. was also his home and it was where he wanted to stay. It took her a while to finally accept it, but eventually she sort of did and things went back to normal. 

But Harry needed the intimacy, he missed it, he missed her. He tried to convince her to fly out to L.A. even just for a weekend but she refused. She kept saying ‘no’ and that she would see him when he came back to London, which was her way of getting him to come home and caused them to constantly bicker and argue. He was getting lonely and even though he had friends in L.A., he needed something more. His hand was no longer enough and when Gracie came along offering a ‘no strings attached’ situation, he couldn’t help but cave in. 

The first time it happened was in San Diego. Harry had met her at a club and by the end of the night he was wasted and Gracie was very forward; his hormones took over and he gave in to her advances. She was the one that hit on him then invited him to her room, kissed him, undressed him and he didn’t resist. The next morning, Harry felt like shit, completely guilt-ridden, so he sent Y/N two dozen red roses and called her to tell her how much he had loved and missed her.

The second time it happened was a few weeks ago in New York, after the Buffalo show at the very beginning of September. Since she lived in New York, Harry arranged for Gracie and her friend to have VIP passes to the show and she was so impressed with their performance that she texted him an address to a hotel with a room number. He doesn’t know why he went, but he did. Of course he felt like a complete ass about it afterwards but Gracie was very sexy and once again, his hormones clouded his judgement.

Fuck, he was a shit boyfriend.

Harry knew that he should go to London a few days prior to their first show and spend time with Y/N but he needed more time to get himself together so that the guilt wouldn’t be evident. 

On Wednesday, before their first concert at the O2, the five guys met at the stadium along with the band and their voice coach for sound check and rehearsed for a few hours, running through the setlist. Afterwards Harry went out with Niall for dinner and a few drinks.

“You going to see Y/N tonight?” Niall asked after they finished eating.

“Yeah, I think I’m going to surprise her at her flat.” Harry nodded.

“How long has it been since you’ve actually seen her mate?” Niall finished off his glass.

“Not since April when she surprised me for our one year, so six months?” Harry hummed.

“Damn, how do you all do it? That would drive me insane.” Niall referred to the rest of us guys with girlfriends and shook his head.

Harry’s breath slightly hitched as he thought about the nights he spent with Gracie, “It’s a lot of work.” 

Around 10pm, after Niall and Harry finished, Harry headed over to Y/N’s flat and let himself in. He remembered when she gave him the key to her place, it was on their one year anniversary. She said since she never knew when he was going to be home, she decided to give him a key so that he can pop by whenever he was in London, he ended up giving him her key as well because he trusted her and loved her.

Harry shuffled across the wooden floors of her dark living room, “Babe?” 

He didn’t hear her respond so he made his way to her bedroom door. He saw that it was slightly cracked open and light was coming out of it along with ‘Ready to Run’ playing softly through her speakers. It was her favorite song on their new album, she told him once after a fight that wherever he was was where she belonged.

He pushed opened the door to see her sleeping peacefully with her dark pink leather bound journal opened and pen in her hand. God, he missed her, he really did and the knot in his stomach twisted from the guilt he felt inside. He gently pulled the journal out from under her arm and pen out of her hand and set them on her bedside table and slowly climbed in bed next to her.

“Harry?” Her eyes shot open when she felt his arms around her waist.

“Hi love, I’ve missed you.” He placed a kiss on her forehead.

“You’re here.” Harry heard her voice crack and knew she was tearing up.

“I’m here.” Harry pulled her close to him.

They both fell asleep entangled in each other’s arms.

The next morning Harry woke to an empty bed but smelled the aroma of bacon throughout her flat.

Harry thanked her for breakfast and kissed her tenderly before he had to take off and meet up with his manager before the show. He left her VIP passes for the concert, telling her how happy he was to finally see her again and she felt the same. 

That night Y/N was sitting with other familiar faces of their first show at the O2 and she cheered her heart out. She had missed the boys so much and had been very excited to see them. She was able to catch up with them backstage before they went on and laughed pretty much the entire time. She adored all five of them and they adored her. She had grown pretty close to the other four boys and she knew that she would be devastated if they were no longer in her life.

After the show, Harry wanted to go to a club with Niall, which really wasn’t Y/N’s scene but of course she went because she wanted to spend as much time with him as she could before he had to leave for another two months. While they were there, Harry seemed distant, he would sneak a kiss here and there but it was as if she didn’t have his attention like she use too. A couple hours after being at the club she had asked Harry to take her home, wanting to spend alone time with him. All she wanted was for him to take her home and ravish her, make her feel loved and wanted.

Harry was a bit upset at Y/N’s behavior, not understanding why she didn’t want to party with him, he knew Gracie would. When they both got back to her flat, she tried to touch him, kiss him but he didn’t feel up for the intimacy she longed for. Instead, he kissed her tenderly and pulled her into his arms.

“I’m very tired tonight love, it’s been a long day, I’m so sorry. I’ll make it up to you tomorrow night.” Harry said sleepily.

She found it very odd that he turned her advances down, he has never done that before, not once. She couldn’t sleep that night for the life of her. She lied awake consumed in her thoughts, wondering if she had done anything wrong in the past few months. She could feel that something was different and it definitely wasn’t all in her head. Harry was distancing himself and she felt her heart ache. Was he seeing someone else? A pit in her stomach was beginning to form and she prayed that it wouldn’t get deeper.

The second night of the show, Gracie decided to surprise Harry. She had a modeling gig in London that week and she wanted to see him. Harry was lucky that Y/N was working late and couldn’t make it to the second show so when Gracie invited Harry to her hotel room, he was elated.

After Y/N had got off work, in which she was a Medical Assistant at St. Thomas’ Hospital, paparazzi bombarded her outside the hospital asking her if she knew Harry was with a model named Gracie Carvalho that evening. Of course she had no idea, she had just worked a 10 hour shift and was too busy with patients to answer any calls or messages. She continued walking to her car, keeping her head down, not saying a word. 

When Y/N finally got home, her friends had sent her links of articles of Harry being seen out with this gorgeous model and the pit in her stomach grew. She gave him a call but he didn’t answer her and she slightly panicked. What if he was cheating on her? 

She quickly took a shower and as soon as she stepped out, her phone started ringing and she quickly accepted it and put him on speaker.

“Hello?”

“Hi babe, sorry I didn’t answer earlier, the club was so loud, I didn’t hear my phone ring.”

“That’s alright Harry.” She stood in the middle of her bathroom, soaked with a towel wrapped around her body and her hair was dripping wet. She needed to speak to him and at the moment she didn’t care that water was getting all over her floor.

“How was work today?” He asked.

“Harry, paparazzi attacked me after work asking if I knew about you and some woman named Gracie?”

“I’m so sorry that happened babe, I’m so sorry.” Harry apologized.

“Who is she?” 

She wasn’t going to beat around the bush.

“Gracie? She’s just a friend that I met in California, she’s in London for work and wanted to catch up, nothing to worry about love.”

But she didn’t trust the way he sounded, it was as if he was hiding something from the way he hesitated to answer and she felt a lump in her throat form. They talked for a few more minutes before he told her that he needed to sleep since he had another show tomorrow. 

As she dried her body and blow-dried her hair, she thought about the past few months, starting from when Harry begun acting different, which was in July, when he was still in California. Was it her? She pulled up the links her friends sent her again and then googled Gracie Carvalho to find out that she was a Victoria Secret angel and she was beautiful.

Y/N began feeling self-conscious and her insecurities grew as she stared at herself in the mirror. Is she not enough for Harry anymore? She knew she was no where close to being a model but Harry always made her feel beautiful. Even before she met him, she thought she was pretty, but now, seeing that perhaps this Gracie person had caught Harry’s attention, maybe she wasn’t enough for him.

The next evening after the third show in London, Harry and Gracie met each other up at a club and this time Niall was there, which meant that Harry had to be careful with his actions around Gracie. Y/N was closest to Niall out of the four boys.

Harry felt his phone vibrate in his pocket and pulled it out to see that Y/N was calling. He didn’t feel like answering since the music was blasting and he knew she was just going to ask him what he was doing, so he decided to text her saying that he was with Niall and that he would call her back later. Harry was reluctant to leave when Gracie texted asking him if he wanted to get out of the club. He fed Niall some bullshit excuse that he didn’t feel well and left 30 minutes after Gracie did.

After his rendezvous with Gracie, Harry headed back to his flat seeing that there were 5 missed calls from Y/N and 10 messages from her asking where he was and why he wasn’t picking up and that Niall told her he left the club at midnight. Harry felt a bit agitated after seeing her messages and was even more annoyed when he saw her car parked outside the front of his house.

“Harry! It’s 1:30 in the morning! I’ve been trying to call you, where have you been?” She spouted off as soon as he walked in.

“I was with Niall, I told you.” He set his things down on the table and took off his boots.

“The headlines also said Gracie was at that club.” Y/N stood up from the couch she was sitting on.

“I guess she was there? I don’t know.” He lied.

“Don’t lie to me Harry, are you cheating on me with her?” Her question completely caught him off guard.

“Y/N!” Harry made a stride across his living room floor, “Of course not, why do you think that.” He placed his hands on her cheeks.

“Because! You’ve been different lately. You’re distant and you’re short with me… you haven’t even touched me since you’ve been back!” Tears sprung to her eyes as she shouted.

“Y/N, I’ve been exhausted! It’s not that I don’t want too, I’m-”

“Because right after every bloody show, you go out drinking and clubbing! You don’t even come home to me or tell me to come over to you!”

“You know you’re always welcome to come out with me.” He said.

“We’ve barely had any alone time together! I don’t want to go out, I want to stay in with you, watch movies like we use too and stay up all night making love!” She felt tears rolled down her cheeks.

“Well I’m sorry I haven’t done any of that with you! I just have been in the mood to go out and have fun! I didn’t think that was a problem!” He snapped at her.

“It’s a problem when you rather club than spend time with your own girlfriend!”

“Whatever Y/N, I’m way too tired to argue with you right now.” Harry stepped around her and went into his room and changed out of his clothes.

She followed him into his closet, “Harry, are you or are you not sleeping with Gracie?”

“I am NOT, when the hell will you get that out of your thick skull?” He growled with his back to her as he undressed.

“Will you stop accusing me of cheating? Where the hell did you even get that from?” He turned around and after he pulled on a pair of short to sleep in.

“Because you’ve just been different!”

“So cheating is your solution? That’s great Y/N, thanks for having so little faith in me!” He shook his head and walked around her.

Harry’s phone kept vibrating and he knew that it was Gracie that was probably calling him so he made sure to keep his phone screen out of Y/N’s sight.

“I’m going home! You’re obviously hiding something from me!” She huffed as she turned on her heels and walked out of his room. After he heard the front door slam shut, Harry checked his phone to see a message from Gracie saying that she wanted more.

Harry texted Gracie his address and told her to come over. He was angry and he needed a way to relieve his stress and Gracie was always down for anything.

Gracie brought over a bottle of wine and they both took turns drinking out of it as they teased each other. Harry ended up giving in first and took her on his bed. Gracie was too drunk to drive home so she fell asleep next to him on his bed after they finished, which was a first.

The next morning Y/N woke up early, she barely slept the night before because she felt so guilty for accusing him of such things. She knew that she should apologize since she had no proof that he was doing something of the sort. Y/N got ready, stopped by Starbucks and ordered her and Harry coffee and headed over to his place.

Y/N was surprised that the door was unlocked when she finally arrived at his house. She knew she locked it before she left last night and thought that maybe Harry went out for a morning jog.

She slowly walked into his flat and saw a trail of clothes from the living room leading into the bedroom and the pit in her stomach deepened and she felt her heart pounding faster. She knew the clothes belonged to a female because she had that exact bra that was dangling on one of his lamps. 

The moment she feared for was here, confirming what she had been suspecting the last two days, the reason everything was different between them and she wasn’t ready, she didn’t want to see him with another women but she needed to. She needed the confirmation. His door was slightly ajar and Y/N took a deep breath before she finally allowed herself to push it open.

She took one step in and she saw two figures laying in his bed. Harry was laying closest to the door and he was facing her direction, his eyes closed, his breathing was steady so she knew he was sleeping. The second figure was laying on Y/N’s side of the bed and she thought she was going to be sick. The coffee cups slipped out of her hands at the sight of the female body, as she felt like the wind was being knocked out of her, and when they hit the wooden floors, the cups cause a loud noise, instantly waking up Harry in time to see Y/N running out of his room.

“Oh shit! Y/N!” Harry scrambled around to find his briefs and chased after her. He lept over the giant puddle of coffee and crash into the wall directly in front of his bedroom door, hurting his toe.

“FUCK! Y/N! Y/N! WAIT!” Harry ran out the door, ignoring the pain in his toe, to see Y/N hopping in her car as she sobbed and she drove away before Harry could even reach her.

“FUCK!” Harry could feel his heart racing faster than ever as the guilt was now eating him alive. He had hurt her. She had found out and he knew she would never be able to unsee what she did.

Harry hurried back into his house and told Gracie she needed to leave as he looked for his phone. Gracie didn’t say anything, she quietly got dressed and left.

Harry called Y/N over and over again but she kept screening or ignoring his calls. He texted her to please answer and pick up but she didn’t reply. Harry spent the day beating himself up for hurting Y/N the way he did, he was so wrong. He was a terrible person.

He tried calling her every fifteen minutes all day, up until the fourth show. He was a proper mess that night. What if he loses her? What if she never forgives him? What if she never wants to see him again? What the hell is he going to do? She’s everything to him and he betrayed her. Why did he do such a stupid thing?

Harry was a wreck: forgetting where to go on stage, running into other boys, almost forgetting lyrics. He had to force his smiles and laughter and he felt terrible towards his fans that he wasn’t giving it his all tonight.

All the guys and crew knew something was off about Harry that evening and kept checking up on him to see if he was alright, but all he wanted and needed was to see Y/N.

After the show ended, Harry rushed out of the stadium and asked to be taken to Y/N’s flat. When he got there he rushed up the steps to her front door and knocked urgently. She didn’t answer and he thought that perhaps she was still at work. Harry checked his watch to see that she should be home soon so he sat in his car and waited.

Harry waited and waited until two hours had passed and she still hadn’t come home. He felt bad that his security team had to wait with him, so eventually he gave up and told them to take him home. She probably was sleeping over at a friends’ because she didn’t want to be alone at a time like this.

The following morning, Harry woke up early and drove over to Y/N’s again but it seemed as if she hadn’t been home at all. Harry didn’t want to seem crazy and stop by her work, because that would draw attention to her hospital and he didn’t want to do that to her. Harry tried calling her again but her phone was now off since it sent him straight to voicemail. He was going absolutely mental not knowing where she was.

Harry spent the rest of the day laying in his bed, waiting until he had to go to the stadium for the fifth show at O2. He told himself that he was going to try again and go back to her flat that night and he knew that she would be home then, he knows her. Y/N couldn’t stand to be away from her bed too long, unless she had too, like for a holiday.

Harry knew that if he was going to get through the show by forcing himself to smile and laugh, he needed alcohol. So when no one was looking, Harry might’ve snuck a small bottle of tequila into his dressing room and took a few swigs.

When the show was over, Harry told his security team to take him back to Y/N’s flat again as he finished the rest of the tequila he poured into his water bottle. They were hesitant but they knew that if they didn’t take him, he would go alone and they couldn’t risk that especially when a concert just ended and all the Directioners were on their concert high, many crazy things have happened.

Harry felt a speckle of hope she he saw that her lights were on in her flat and nearly jumped out of the moving suburban when they were a few buildings away. Harry sprinted up her steps as he pulled out the key she gave him and opened the door to find Y/N sobbing into her pillow. He felt his heart lurch at the sight of her in pain.

“Get out Harry.” Her voice cracked when he came into view.

“Y/N please! Please forgive me!” Harry rushed to the front of where she was sitting and got down on his knees and took her hands in his.

“Don’t touch me Harry!” She shouted as she pulled herself away from him.

Harry felt his heart break inside seeing her hurt because of him and hearing her say those words to him. He dropped his hands to his side, not wanting to upset her anymore.

“Y/N, please forgive me.” He pleaded.

“You lied to me! You lied to me about her! You made me feel like I was crazy and was wrong for accusing you of such things and I didn’t even want to believe it myself! But fuck! I am such an idiot!” Tears streamed down her face as she yelled at him.

“No, I’m the idiot! You aren’t crazy… Y/N, please! I need you to forgive me!” Harry could feel his face heating up as he fought back tears.

“Forgive you? How am I ever suppose to forgive you Harry! She was in your bed! Do you understand that I will never ever be able to get that image out of my head! You’re the worst!” She stood up from where she was sitting and walked away from him.

Harry pushed himself off the floor and grabbed her arm so that she could face him and she jerked herself away from him.

“I said don’t touch me Harry! Not when you’ve touched another woman with those hands!” She sobbed and tears were surfacing in Harry’s eyes.

“Y/N! I am begging you! Please forgive me! I was wrong, so so wrong! I never should’ve slept with her! I don’t even know why I did it! It was such a stupid mistake! You’re right, I am the worst, but I need you. I love you, I love you so much.” Now tears were streaming down his face.

“No Harry, you’re not allowed to say you love me, because if you loved me, you would’ve never ever betrayed me like that.”

“You’re right, you are so right but I was stupid and weak. But I can promise you with everything I have that I do love you!” Harry’s voice was desperate.

“Harry, you don’t and I can’t do this with you. No, I’m not doing this with you anymore. We’re over.” She managed to say without hesitation.

When Harry heard those words come out of her mouth, he completely lost the ability to breathe. He collapsed onto his knees in front of her and sobbed, “Please Y/N, please don’t leave me. I never ever should’ve hurt you. She’s nothing to me! It never meant anything to me, I promise you, nothing. You mean everything to me.” 

“How many times Harry?” Her question not only surprised him but herself as well.

“What…?” He sniffled and looked up at her.

“How many times did you sleep with her?” She wiped the tears from her cheeks and stared down into his green eyes.

Harry was debating on lying to her or telling the truth, but he had a feeling that if he lied she would know, “Five.”

There was no point in lying to her because for some reason Y/N always knew when he did, she said he had tell but he couldn’t figure out what it was for the life of him.

Harry watched all the color drain out of her face when he finally told the truth and she couldn’t even find the strength to look at him anymore.

“Get out Harry.” She softly said as turned her head to the side and covered her mouth.

“Y/N… please don’t do this to me.” Harry stood back up and put his hands on her arms.

“Don’t do this to you?! What about what you’ve done to me?” She turned her body away from him and wrapped her arms around her self.

“I know! God! I know what I did hurt you but-”

“No Harry, it nearly killed me.” She spat.

“Y/N, I am begging you, please don’t end this.” Harry pleaded again, his hands in his chest.

“Harry. You slept with someone else. You touched someone else. I will never be able to trust you again.”

“Y/N, I would do anything and everything to make it up to you, to earn back your trust, how ever long it takes. I need you Y/N, I fucked up and I know I did, but please… give me another chance.”

It took everything in Y/N to do what she did next but she had to do what was best for her.

She took a step back and shook her head. 

“No Harry, no. I can’t even look at you anymore. You are not the Harry I fell in love with. I know that over time people change and I’ve accepted and learned to love all of you and your changes over the past year, but I never would have ever thought that you could hurt me like this. I just… I just can’t be with you anymore.”

Harry felt his world crumble around him as she finished, his eyes stung and he felt as if he couldn’t breathe anymore. 

“Please go, Harry.” She said sternly.

“Y/N.” He struggled to say in between his sobs.

“Please, go.” This time her voice was soft.

After a few moment Harry finally took a step and put himself in front of Y/N. He gently lifted her chin and looked in her eyes, “I am… so sorry Y/N.” 

Harry’s feet moved across her floor as he made his way to the door. He looked over his shoulder at her one more time before he finally felt as if he had no choice but to walk away for good. He lost her, he had lost her and it was all his fault. Everything was his fault, all because he didn’t realize what an amazing girlfriend he had right in front of him before he had fucked it all up. 

She didn’t deserve this, she deserved someone who was strong and who loved her enough to never even look at another woman. He should’ve been that man, he could’ve been that man but he was weak and she deserved someone better.

As Y/N watched Harry walk out of her flat, she watched her first love walk out of her life. She knew that a part of her will always love him and eventually she would forgive him.  Even though every part of her wanted to say his name and have him hold her in his arms, her head knew better. She knew she deserved better than that… even if he is Harry Styles.

<3 M

Why Symmetra Works

I’ve been thinking a lot about how media portrays neurodivergent characters and why I usually hate most of the confirmed characters despite being autistic myself. But despite that I find I really loved Satya when it was announced she was autistic. 

And I think it all comes down to this: Yes she is characterized doing mostly the standard things people think of when they hear the word autism. But they way she is written and acted feels more sincere. At least to me it does. Also her neurodivergence isn’t treated as some bittersweet tragedy or inspiration-porn. If anything she confidently says that her mind is her greatest weapon and being autistic has allowed her to do her job best since she “sees things other don’t”.  

Also another important thing with Satya is that her characters isn’t wholly focused on her autism. Yes it helps her be her and gives her definition but it isn’t who she is. She’s also an expert architect with years of training since her childhood, it’s her passion and she loves doing it. But she’s also conflicted because she’s quickly realizing the corporation that trained her and gave her this opportunity may not be as good as she had always thought. She’s a artist and a tactical genius making buildings and weapons out of thin air. She’s caring. She wants to make the world a better place. And she’s also prideful, thinking that her way might only be the right way. Having all this is what really fleshes her out and made me love her as well as being confirmed autistic. 

At least this is my opinion on Symmetra and why I think she’s light years better than most other “confirmed” autistic and neurodivergent characters. (I specify “confirmed” because while I headcanon many different characters across several fandoms as autistic, I’ve noticed most characters who are confirmed by writers and directors to be autistic can be written very differently from speculated “quirky” characters. Especially when they aren’t handled by the right writers.)

Ok rant over lol

the-certified-cabinet  asked:

Why do you ship Harry x Luna over Harry x Ginny?

Idk how far into this territory I want to go, because I have a very, very large distaste for H/G for multiple reasons, so I’ll try to keep my answer simple.

H/G is a relationship based off of Ginny being the Love Interest to Harry, and not Harry being the Love Interest of Ginny. In other words, their relationship is highly imbalanced. Multiple times throughout the book we see that Harry puts Ginny down. Multiple. Times. I’m not talking about books 1-3, because let’s be honest they are children at that point and it’s unfair to compare the first three books to books 4-7 when it comes to relationships. Harry doesn’t trust Ginny. He may say he does, and he may seem like he does, but he doesn’t. One of the biggest indicators of this is this scene:

“Hi”, said Ginny uncertainly.  “We recognized Harry’s voice – what are you yelling about?”
“Never you mind,” said Harry roughly.
Ginny raised her eyebrows.
“There is no need to take that tone with me,” she said coolly.  “I was only wondering whether I could help.”
“Well, you can’t” said Harry shortly.

I remember reading this scene and wanting to flip my book, I was so mad. Harry talks and treats Ginny like she is a subordinate to him, not his equal. He does this a lot in the books, both before and after they are together. And honestly? That’s not how a relationship should work. J.K. always meant for H/G to be together, and yet she, herself, wrote them as more toxic than anything else. 

But the main reason, among many others, that I don’t ship H/G, comes from this quote in the book right here:

“Smart girl, that Hermione,” said Harry, trying to smile. “I just wish I’d asked you sooner. We could’ve had ages… months… years maybe…”
“But you’ve been too busy saving the wizarding world,” said Ginny, half-laughing. “Well… I can’t say I’m surprised. I knew this would happen in the end. I knew you wouldn’t be happy unless you were hunting Voldemort. Maybe that’s why I like you so much.”

I almost have to laugh reading this now, because It’s almost like J.K. was writing to herself in that paragraph with Harry. She could’ve had years to develop a believable relationship between H/G, instead she decided to stuff it all in the last two books and turn Ginny, who is one of my favorite female characters into a LI who, I am suppose to believe, let Harry Potter name of their children after SEVERUS SNAPE.

But I’ve bolded the reason, the real reason that H/G is unlike H/L, a very poignant reason:

Why. The. Hell. Would Ginny like Harry because he hunts Voldemort? Or even believe that he would be? That is the underlining problem with H/G for me. It makes no sense. Harry has multiple times said he doesn’t want to be the chosen one, he didn’t want this life, he just wanted to be Harry. And yet here we see Ginny, saying that Harry won’t be happy unless he’s hunting Voldemort and THAT’S why she likes him so much? What is this? This would be a slap in the face if I was Harry. It shows that Ginny still defines Harry the same way everyone else does. Hero. Noble. Savior. Defeater of Voldemort. Chosen One. That’s why I like you. Because you’re a hero. Because you go risk your life AND THE LIFE OF MANY OTHERS. Because let’s be honest, Harry makes stupid decisions and everytime he gets reprimanded on them by Ginny she either 1. defends his bad decisions or 2. ends up getting into an argument with him about it that leaves both sides irritated.

But you know who doesn’t see Harry like that?

Luna. Freakin’. Lovegood.

Luna stands up for Harry not because he’s the chosen one but because she believes in him. She believes in his cause, believes in his ability, and has faith in him. But she doesn’t take his crap, and when he talks down to her she doesn’t snap back at him. She is grounded, unlike Ginny, who is a firecracker. Two bull-headed people should never be paired together. Luna is like water, she puts out Harry’s flame and calms him, whereas Harry shows multiple times his affection and liking towards Luna for who she is, which no one, outside of Ginny (who also called her Loony once), is shown to do. Luna isn’t Harry’s step stool, she’s his equal.

And, as I’ve said before in other posts, they understand eachother. Luna and Harry are both outcasts. They both have suffered from people not believing in them, or thinking they are crazy. They are both pinpointed, though for different reasons. Harry never undermines Luna’s beliefs, though he finds her amusing (and not in a degrading sense), and Luna is shown to be very fond of Harry, because she cares about him. They are friends, and in many ways, kindred spirits. They have a deeper connection, and it was Luna, not anyone else, who was able to get Harry to take the first step in acceptance of Sirius’s death in Book 5.

Sorry, I didn’t mean this to sound SO anti H/G. I could’ve written a lot more but I’ll end my answer here. Basically, I think H/G is toxic and based on “emotions” more than anything else, where as H/L has a genuine friendship and connection and understanding. H/G only succeeds in doing the opposite. It makes fools out of both Harry and Ginny, and goes against everything we’ve seen in development for the characters thus far. And any ship that can only sail if the female character gets bogged down to fit the mold of a subordinate LI to the hero is not one that I want to see happen. And I think most Lunarry shippers know that if H/L were to have become canon, that would not have been the case. 

Season 10 - the verdict

If you’re just reading this to pick a fight because your taste differs from mine, then I suggest you don’t read further. However, if you’re up for a civilized discussion and exchanged of opinions, then go ahead :) I’m certainly not one to critize just for the sake of complaining, but I’d like to express my views on the latest season that has let me down.

Keep reading

Appreciating You

Just a cute little moment between Lapis and Peridot I came up with at 3AM last night and banged out in a single sitting this afternoon. So apologies if it ain’t that great! I’m very happy with it, so I hope you will be too!

DISCLAIMER: I do not own Steven Universe or any of its characters I use within this non-profit story. It belongs to Rebecca Sugar and Cartoon Network respectively. Please support the official release!


“So?”

Lapis had been nibbling on her fingernails for almost fifteen minutes by the time she couldn’t handle the anticipation any longer and spoke up.

Sitting across from her in their shared living room space sat a young blonde, green eyed girl with hair a triangle of a mess that contrasted Lapis’ more neatly dyed blue hair and skin so pale she practically glowed. In her lap rested a black laptop covered in a random assortment of stickers, its glow reflecting off of the glasses the young blonde wore. Within those reflective lenses Lapis could just barely make out the tiny digitally printed words the other occupant of the room was so intently focused on.

“Peridot, you’re killing me,” Lapis whined, feeling like she was going to explode when the blonde did not answer her previous inquiry.

Peridot, as the blonde has been revealed to be called, held up a single finger. “Hold on, almost done,” she said, never once letting her eyes stray from the words on the laptop.

Lapis huffed, crossing her arms. Patience had never been one of her virtues, but she had no choice in this situation. She was asking for a favor, and it wouldn’t be polite to demand hastiness in such a situation.

Didn’t mean she had to smile about it, though.

As she waited, she examined Peridot’s face. It was currently in a neutral expression, her green eyes flitting back and forth as she read. Her lips pursed just the tiniest bit as she concentrated on the screen in her lap, a cute little habit Lapis had long since noticed she had. They were both dressed in their nightly wear; Lapis in a white tank top and blue sweat pants, and Peridot in a green tee with the words I Believe printed across her chest in simple text and black shorts. They were seated across from each other in their small apartment’s even smaller living room, Lapis on the loveseat couch and Peridot on the computer chair she had pulled over from the desk nestled in the corner behind her.

Lapis would have preferred Peridot join her on the loveseat as she could cuddle the girl while she read, but Peridot had insisted they keep a small distance between them so she could focus. Lapis had wanted to protest, but had been silenced when Peridot had begun reading, her anxiety kicking in.

What if Peridot didn’t like it? What if it was garbage? What if she couldn’t pull it off? What if-?

“Okay,” Peridot hummed, straightening up in her chair as she disengaged from the laptop. She stretched her neck muscles, having been hunched slightly while reading, sighing when she felt a pleasant pop! on each side of her head. “I’m done.”

As Peridot’s words reached her she placed the nails of her right index and middle fingers back into her mouth as her anxiety spiked even further.

“Well?” she tentatively asked, not sure if she was ready for the answer.

“It’s very good. Very well written,” Peridot hesitated, her face scrunching as she fought to find the right words. “It’s very descriptive, very in-depth, very detailed-”

“You hate it.”

Peridot winced, as if Lapis had just swiped at her. “No! Not at all! Why would you think that?”

“Because you basically just said the same thing three times in a row just with different wording,” Lapis pointed out. “And you’re making that face.”

“What face?”

“The face you make when you’re trying to hide what you’re actually thinking from me.”

Peridot groaned. “I like it! I really do!”

“The face!”

Peridot pulled at her hair, producing a string of odd noises, very obviously fighting off one of her famous fits. Lapis knew her girlfriend too well for her to be able to hide anything from her.

“Lapis-” Peridot tried, but she wouldn’t have any of it.

“Just tell me the truth,” Lapis pleaded softly, pouting her lips in the way she knew Peridot couldn’t resist for extra effect. “I want honest feedback. Please?”

Peridot gave a long sigh, knowing she had lost the battle the second Lapis puppy-dog eyed her. “Alright, alright,” she relented. “You really want my honest opinion?”

Lapis nodded eagerly. She valued Peridot’s opinion so much more than anyone else’s, even if she wouldn’t ever actually say that to the girl. Would just inflate her already ginormous ego.

“I wasn’t lying when I said it was well written,” she began, “I really do think it’s expertly descriptive. You have strength in describing scenery and a character’s appearance and how they’re feeling.”

“But?” Lapis prompted.

“But…” Peridot hesitated. She was always so supportive of Lapis, so understanding and patient with her. Lapis could only imagine the internal struggle she had with trying to give her constructive criticism and not coming off mean sounding. “Why Sci-Fi?”

Lapis gave a frown in response to this. “What do you mean? I thought science fiction was your favorite genre?”

“It is,” Peridot acquiesced. “District 9 is my kryptonite. It’s just it’s not your favorite genre. To watch, to read, or to write in. So why are you steering away from your normal contemporary dramas for it?”

Lapis flushed slightly at the question. It was true science fiction had never really been her forte. When she had begun her writing career three years prior she had steadfastly stuck with interpersonal drama-type novels and stories with the occasional crime/thriller subplot. Her publisher ate it up like freshly cooked salmon, her fanbase clamored for it, and it was thanks to it that she was able to keep up with her half of the rent. So it was understandable for Peridot to be curious as to why, all of a sudden, Lapis was jumping ship.

“I don’t know,” Lapis shrugged, hoping it seemed nonchalant, unable to meet her girlfriend’s eyes. She played with the ends of her bangs, noting how she should probably get her dye touched up soon.

“Now you’re using your face,” Peridot pointed out, a little too smugly for Lapis’ liking.

Lapis playfully hissed at her, crossing her arms over her bosom. “I just wanted a change of pace, ya know? Try something new. Test my skills.”

“Mhm,” Peridot stared, not wholly convinced.

Lapis said nothing to this, continuing to play with her hair, hoping Peridot would drop the subject. But Peridot just kept staring, causing Lapis to sweat, relentless in this just as she was in everything in her life. Maybe if Lapis took her top off, Peridot would be too distracted to further question her motives.

“Wait,” Peridot suddenly exclaimed before Lapis could reach down to the hem of her tank top. “Is the reason you’re writing this because it’s my favorite genre?”

Lapis froze, a deer caught in headlights, which gave Peridot all the answer she needed.

“Oh my stars, it is!”

“N-No!” Lapis defended, a little too late. “I’m just trying to stretch my creative muscles a bit! I swear!”

Face!

“Ugh!” Lapis groaned, running a hand through her hair in resignation. “Fine, yes! You caught me. I was trying to write something specifically for you, okay? Happy now?”

Peridot beamed in triumph, always one to enjoy her victories boastfully, but then immediately flushed after at the total realization of what had just been admitted.

“Lapis,” Peridot said softly, leaning forward to catch her attention. “You don’t have to do that. I love all of your writings; you don’t have to cater to me ever.”

The blue haired authoress sighed, letting her arms dangle at her sides and leaning back into the couch as she spoke, “I know, it’s just…” she blushed, fighting to find the right words to say. This was so much easier on the computer, she thought. “I know what I usually write isn’t your favorite style, but you read it anyway to support me. That means so much to me, ya know? I just wanted, for once, to have something that was specifically set for your tastes, to thank you for everything you do for me and my writing.”

“Lapis…”

“I wanted to write something you’d personally be able to reread over and over again. I wanted to give that to you, to show just how much I appreciate you. Because I do, a lot.”

Peridot stared at Lapis, taken aback by her sudden vulnerability. Lapis had never been able to easily express her feelings before, which was one of the main reasons she had taken to writing so quickly. It was a medium where one could openly express themselves without actually talking - where she could describe her feelings in a way that detached herself from them entirely but still got them out. It was a beautiful art, one that Lapis was blessed with having the power to perform.

So for Lapis to be sitting there, speaking from the heart in a way that didn’t involve tapping furiously away at the keyboard, had Peridot stunned slightly.

Finally, Peridot found her voice after a solitary moment of silence, and used it to chuckle.

“You’re too much sometimes, you know that?” Peridot chided, not unkindly.

Lapis caught on quickly to Peridot’s meaning, and snorted, still blushing from her speech. “After all these years you’re just realizing that now?” she quipped.

Peridot shook her head, closing the laptop and placing it on the seat of the chair as she stood, making her way over to the couch to settle down next to Lapis, the taller girl’s arm instantly wrapping around her shoulders to pull her closer.

They sat like that for a moment, just enjoying one another’s company on the couch. Lapis enjoyed this aspect of their relationship the most: the times they could just hold one another and be quiet, nothing needing to be said between them. They understood each other in a way no one else did, so attuned to each other’s feelings they were easily able to call it out when one of them was lying or hiding something. It was a better relationship than Lapis could have ever hoped for as a teen. She knew she had found the one the day she met Peridot.

“You never have to thank me, just so you know,” Peridot said into Lapis’ shoulder, breaking the silence. “Even if it’s not my favorite genre, I still love your novels. I enjoy getting to be the first to read them. That’s all the thanks I need.”

Lapis smiled, kissing the top of her girlfriend’s blonde head. “You’re such a sap,” she teased.

“Hey, you appreciate this sap,” Peridot shot back playfully, causing Lapis to snort out a laugh.

“That I do,” she relented. “That I do.”

Peridot once again gave her smug little smile, snuggling her face into Lapis’ side to get more comfortable. Lapis would have greatly enjoyed closing her eyes and enjoying the moment longer, holding her beloved so close and so intimately, but there was one last question that burned in her mind.

“So, it was that bad, huh?”

The response was immediate, “Planet Arium? Seriously?”

Fandom Things That Drive Me Batty - For Real

OK, you (meaning at least six of you lol) asked for it. Here is the rundown of things that drive me batty within our fandom, ranging from the petty to the - well, they’re technically all petty, and I admit that. Below the cut because if you don’t want to know - please don’t read. Because there are some very common things in there that I know other people like. This is entirely my own personal opinion on things. You have been warned. Also they are in no particular order and I try to explain why they drive me nuts instead of just listing things.

IMPORTANT: I am also guilty of some of these things in my own writing and posts and I know it. Doesn’t mean it doesn’t still drive me batty.

It’s also important as you read these to mentally add “Unless it’s written really well” to the end of each item. Because there are always exceptions to every rule, including every whining word you read below.

Keep reading

Why don’t I see what other people see?

That anon question I got, got me thinking.

I get that kind of response a lot.  From people who are sure they’re right about crazy people being violent and dangerous in a way sane people aren’t.  Sometimes they outright tell me that I’ve seen the same things they have, but that I refuse to acknowledge it for “political” reasons.

It’s not like that at all.

I look at crazy people and I see people who vary as much as sane people.

People have asked me – incredulously – “Have you ever known anyone with dementia?”

Because I didn’t think tricking people with dementia into believing they were leaving a place and escaping, while the entire place they “leave” to is utterly fake, is the wonderful humane thing everyone else seems to see it as.

Especially after an experience with delirium – which can produce similar disorientation to dementia – in which I developed the delusion that I never left the hospital, that I was the one patient who never left the hospital, that my memories of home were a hallucination or a trick, and that they had set up an entire fake town and kept alive one friend of mine so that I would believe I was leaving and staying with a friend when really I’d spend the rest of my life in a hospital in what seemed like the future because I’d been there so long I didn’t realize what year it was and how everything had changed.  Luckily the delirium began to subside before I was rushed back to the hospital or I’d

And like – experiencing that, even as a delusion, was enough to convince me it’s completely horrible to trick people that way, especially if they have any trouble at all understanding reality.

But that’s not actually my main point.

Like.

I believe that institutions suck because I know disabled people and because I have been in and seen the inside of way too many institutions.  This includes crazy people, but also all kinds of disabled people.  (I fall or have at one time fallen into most of the major disability categories – cognitive, physical, psychiatric, developmental, emotional, chronic illness, congenital, acquired, progressive, stable, cyclical, etc.  I know people from all the categories, whether I belong to them or not.)

I believe what I believe about people with dementia because I know people with dementia.

But when I look at people with dementia I don’t see whatever the fuck everyone else seems to be seeing.

I see people.  Not people missing some vital component of being human beings.   Just human beings.

And this isn’t something I force to happen because of my ideas about the world.  I get my ideas about the world from observing the world.  I just observe different things.

I see someone who is seen as unable to answer questions, when what it looks like to me is she processes and responds to information very slowly, and nobody wants to wait around, or even thinks of waiting around.  When she answers at all, the conversation has moved so far on that nobody notices she’s not speaking nonsense, she’s just responding much slower than them.

And the more I see people with dementia, stroke, autism, intellectual disability, etc., who are automatically written off, the more I just see people, who are always taking in and responding to their environment, just not always in the usual ways.

And so many other people, even other people with some of these labels, see the same people as unpersons or only partial persons.  And I know this is how many people see me unless I prove I’m a person, which I can’t always do.

I swear people look at us and see images in their head rather than people.

I see people.

This is an area where I have a strong conviction that what I see is accurate.  It seems to be backed up by the perceptions of some other people - just not most people.

And this doesn’t mean I’m “better than” anyone or silencing my real perception in favor of wha tI want to see. This is really what I see.

And that’s the main thing I want to say:  People tell me to look at certain people so I look at certain people (including myself, often) and see things they don’t and don’t see things they do.

And now my brain wants to shut off.  See you.

Every year I rewatch the show One Tree Hill, every single year since it ended. And I don’t only do it because it is one of my favorite shows, but because the character of Peyton Sawyer is someone that I relate to on a cosmic level. There was something chemical about it right from the very beginning. Never has there ever been a fictional character that I’ve clung to and felt so connected to, right down to my very soul. I even had a friend in high school that called me Peyton. She’s an artist and lives for music, all of which I relate to on an outer level. But it’s her character’s core that pulls me to her. She’s withdrawn and uses her artwork and love of music to deal with her problems. At times, she is her own best friend and worst enemy. She has trouble letting people in, trusting them completely, because in the end people always leave. And she is right. People always leave. More importantly, the reasons she is like that is because she lost her mother at such a young age. She lost her fast and without any warning. She watched her die and she lives and struggles with that every day.

I lost my mother at a young age and I lost her unexpectedly, without any warning. So much so, that I don’t even remember the last thing that I said to her because I didn’t think she was going to leave this world the next day. I wonder every day how my life would be different had I not found her dying in my living room. Yes, very similar to how Peyton found Ellie. I wonder what I would be like if she were still around. Peyton Sawyer is my feelings, my thoughts written out in a fictional character. She’s soft on the inside and hard as hell on the outside. She is me.

When my mother died I was fairly new with my love for OTH and because of that I used it as a way to cope. When it came to Peyton, I instantly felt like I never understood a fictional character more. I knew what she felt and I knew why she felt it. I watched how she struggled and how she evolved. I felt everything she went through. Seeing where she ended up in life, coping with the loss of both her mothers, the tragedies she endured, losing the love of her life, but in the end making her dreams come true… gives me something to strive for. Her courage and passion inspire the hell out of me. I just hope I have the same strength as a fictional character to overcome the obstacles in my life. Like Peyton once felt, surviving is just about all the living I can handle.

Let's get something straight...

I don’t hate Candice Patton. Now let me say that one more time for the people in the back, I DON’T HATE CANDICE PATTON. All that it is, is that I very much dislike lris West, and it is not because she has dark skin. It is perfectly okay to not dislike the actor/ actress, but hate the character. It is how lris is written and her personality that I don’t like. There is no legitimate reason for her to be on team flash besides crossing her arms over her chest and just agreeing with whatever is said, and she can be selfish and self-centered (those subtlety mean two different things). In addition, the sad truth is that she (lris) is now just a love interest. It’s upsetting to think that the writers have stooped low enough to just make her a love interest. Now I know that she is supposed to be the “leader” of team flash, but what happens when Barry comes back from the speed force? I just feel like when he comes back he will resume his role as the so called “leader”, (not saying that he was actually the leader) not knowing that lris has been doing it while he was gone. However, I hate to use the term, “leader” in the context of the Flash because I don’t think that team flash needs a leader. They work as a unit without having one person solemnly in charge. Getting back on topic, lris used to have a purpose on the show as a reporter, and I’m just having a hard time seeing what her purpose will be, besides Barry’s love interest, after he comes back from the speed force. For the final time, I like Candice Patton as an actress, but I haven’t seen anything else she has been in (or know if she’s been in other films) so I can’t judge her acting based on a poorly written character. Some people may not like lris West, and that’s okay. Now what is not okay is racism and hating a character or actor/actress based on the pigment of their skin. I could honestly care less if lris was light skinned or blue or purple; it would not change my opinion of her (lris). I refrained from trying to bring ships into this, but it’s probable that I’ll get some hate. I am not sorry for having my own opinion, whether or not others agree with it. Thank you for reading this long ass explanation and feel free to leave thoughts and likes if wanted.

moroniccyclops  asked:

Yeah! i feel like vriska would hyperbolize some of the stuff in the journal- and lesath would look up to her even more because of it? like it would be like very minor stupid things like eating breakfast or something-

I think the difference between how mindfang and vriska write their journals will be in that vriska would have written hers SPECIFICALLY for her descendant, like she felt mindfang did. So, she’d probably cover things like how to feed spidermom and how to go about being a kid and growing up (it’s hard and nobody understands), she’d put things down like what mistakes to avoid. She’d cover her adventure’s too, but of course she’d wanna seem cool for her descendent.

MCU!Buckynat

What if Natasha and Bucky met way back in the story, but neither of them remember it? 

I know Nat is supposed to be born in 1984, according to Zola, but it could not be true for plenty of reasons also in the MCU, so… Let my imagination draw another scenario that will never happen in the movies. 

In CA:TFA Bucky and Steve went on a double date at a Science fair, where Howard Stark presented a prototype of a flying car. We saw how it went: Steve decided to try to enlist for the thousandth time, leaving Bucky with the two girls. What we didn’t see was Natasha being on a mission for URSS. She was trying to walk away as fast as possible, after stealing some of the Stark’s projects. Bucky was smiling at the young lady at the stand, where he just bought some snacks for the night. So, neither of them saw the other and they literally collide with each other.

«I’m sorry, Miss» said Bucky, observing her dress stained with some of the ice-cream he bought.

«It doesn’t matter» and she started walking away, without even looking at him. But he gave her his handkerchief to clean the dress and Natasha looked up. «Thank you» she said, genuinely surprised for his kindness and his smile. Then, she noticed the uniform and said, almost with a sad tone, «You’re a soldier».

«Yes, I’m leaving tomorrow» answered Bucky proudly, but then he asked «You don’t like soldiers, do you?».

«No, I don’t» she said, looking around. 

«I think you’re one of the few women who don’t like a man in uniform» he joked, every second more aware of how beautiful she was.

«They tend to die» Natasha answered coolly, thinking about what she just stole.

«That’s… true» he said a bit embarrassed «May I know your name?».

Natasha looked around again, hesitant because of his smile. And his eyes. Then, she turned him, took the lipstick from the bag and wrote something quickly leaning against his back. «Good luck, soldier» she said with a smile, before disappearing in the crowd. Bucky didn’t even have the time to answer her, he stayed there staring at the point where he saw her walked away. After few seconds, he looked at the handkerchief she put on his hand: Natalia was written in a red tone. He smiled again and went back to Steve, who was having a hard time entertaining the two ladies.

It was only many years later that they met again, in a very different situation. But, when Bucky heard her name during the training, something in him clicked. «Natalia…» he repeated in a whisper, as he was dragged back. Not that he remembered consciously, it seemed just a beautiful name. And Natasha didn’t realize that the kind soldier she met in her youth was him. They fell in love, because it was always meant to be.

There’s a legend, I think it’s Chinese, that narrates you have an invisible red thread on your little finger that connects you with your soul mate. I could remember it wrongly, but essentially it means these two people are destined to meet and love each other. And I imagine Bucky and Natasha being linked by this invisible thread which keep attracting them, over and over again.

littleagentofsmash  asked:

How would Megamind react if Roxanne turned into one of his kind? Or better, was secretly one of his kind and that's why they get along so well and one day she reveals it and he's like, "haha, nice joke-WHAT." Also, where does Megamind's name, Syx, come from? I'm really curious.

hmmmm…I don’t think Roxanne really turning into / actually being M’ega is really my personal cup of tea, writing-wise. (I’m…not completely certain why? Maybe it’s because I really like the ‘we’re the same but different’ thing the human Roxanne and alien Megamind have. Misfits fitting together? That kind of a thing.)

BUT! I do have a fic on my (very large, very nebulous) to-be-written list that involves sexy disguise watch shenanigans, and Roxanne does use the watch at one point to look like a M’ega version of herself!

Back before I started writing Megamind fic, I read a whole bunch of it, and in several stories by different authors, the text had Megamind’s childhood name as “Syx”. 

Because it was found in multiple stories, and some of the content on the LJ com is now gone, I don’t think the fandom is certain of who came up with it originally.

I really liked it, though; it sounded suitably alien, and it makes Megamind’s line in the movie about “imagine the most horrible, terrifying, evil thing you can possibly think of, and then multiply it…by six!” into a dorky pun.

So “Syx” was the first word I decided would be a part of the M’ega language <3

Cana Alberona Character analysis

Before you start reading this, put in mind that if you are a close minded fanboy(this applies to both girls and boys) you will not like what I say.

History:

Cana was one of the first children to join Fairy Tail. She joined the guild after her mother died and left her in the custody of Gildarts. Cana decided to join Fairy Tail in particular because her father was already a member. She wanted to speak to him and tell him the truth, since he doesn’t know he even had a child. She didn’t have the courage to confess to him, so she decided that once she becomes an S-Class mage, she will tell Gildarts the Truth.

Her backstory is often repeated in media, it’s not something new and innovative. However, I actually like her backstory; Cana herself is what makes her backstory, not the other way around. We don’t see any signs of her past affecting her personality and affecting everyday life, other than her drinking habit. (I will talk more about it in the development section)

Personality:

She is often described as an alcoholic, and I wish people would stop saying that because “alcoholic” is NOT a personality trait, it is a habit. It’s the same as describing Levy’s personality as  “bookworm”.

Although she and acts like a laid back person, she is one of the most serious members of FT. she often takes leadership in dire situations, which proves how much of a responsible and mature person she is.

During the Tenrou Island Arc, Cana showed a different side of her. Selfishness, she put her Guildmates at risk in order for her to become an S-Class mage, to confess to Gildarts.

I think her personality is one of the best written in all of Fairy Tail. She is somewhat realistic and different from most of the characters in Fairy Tail.

However, there’s one thing about Cana that I really dislike about her, which is Boob Groping. If this is Mashima’s way to tell us that Cana is a lesbian or a bisexual, then I think he’s being very disrespectful, because this is sexual harassment. There are many ways to show subtle hints about her sexuality without having her act like a sex offender. Best example I can give with subtle hints about a character’s sexuality is Freed.

Development:

Cana is one of the best developed characters in all of Fairy Tail. Her development is realistic, she didn’t suddenly change 180o. The way she changed would happen to a normal person; she matured a little after her mistakes (risking the lives of her guildmates), started caring more about them and became more protective over them. But sadly, she is not given credit for it.

Now, the thing I wanted to mention in her backstory was how she kept on failing the S-Class promotional exam, and was even surpassed by Mirajane and Erza, who joined the guild after her. I kind of wished she showed more of her Selfish side during that time. I wished she would be envious and jealous of their achievements. If she was like this (I highly doubt though) it would have gave more depth to her development, it would have gave a meaning behind her sudden selfish act during Tenrou arc.

Magic:

Her magic is a wasted potential, just like Levy’s Magic. She can be extremely powerful against her enemies as she is not restricted to one element only. And her magic has so many uses! But sadly we don’t get to see her in a major battle, where we would be able to see the extent of her power and magic.

Relationships:

There’s not much to say about her relationships. She’s on good terms with everyone in her guild.

The thing I want to talk about is I’m glad she’s not in a romantic relationship, and she’s not in a popular ship like the big four that would 1000000% become canon. Because I think her character would be reduced to a ship character only, like Levy and Juvia, where they appear only around their lovers.

But having the Plot’s focus on the ships and not the friendships, she started getting less screen time.

Design:

She has a pretty design, not an extremely memorable one though. I really wished he gave her a haircut after the time-skip and made her hair short. Lastly, I love her outfits. The way she dresses really flatters her personality. I don’t know how to fully explain this, but here are some reasons why I like her outfits:

1- The way she dresses complements her laid back attitude.

2- She is a pervert who likes groping boobs. So seeing how she likes the sight of breasts would make sense to why she would wear bikini tops.

3- Ever since her first appearance, she always dressed in a bikini top and capri pants. She didn’t suddenly start dressing up like out of the blue.

And Finally, I give her:

7.5/10 (from a Fairy Tail standard)

She’s a really well written character. It saddens me that not a lot of people talk about her. I also hope she gets more screen-time in the future along with a Major battle that would explain more of her magic.

-Mods Taco & Turtle.

anonymous asked:

Hi! So in s1e4 of DD, Claire seems to be encouraging Matt to help the city, but in e11, part of her reason for not pursuing a relationship with Matt was because "I know you're not going to stop". Do you think there's an inconsistency in the way she's written wrt her romantic decisions since in Luke Cage, she encouraged Luke to use his powers to help Harlem, & then wanted to be with Luke?

   Good question! This distinction, for us, comes down two factors: Claire’s character development, and the fact that Matt and Luke are very different people. When Claire encourages Matt to continue his vigilante activity in DD Season 1 episode 4, she is speaking from a place of fear. She’s just been kidnapped and threatened, she has been thrown headfirst into Hell’s Kitchen’s criminal underworld, and she feels unsafe. She’s also seen all of the people Matt has saved through her work at the hospital, and she wants to believe that he can beat back all of the darkness she now sees around her. She supports the idea of superheroes, and she likes what Matt is trying to do. But between episodes 4 and 11 Claire also comes to realize that Matt really doesn’t know what he’s doing. He is nearly killed over and over again, he contemplates murder, and he demonstrates that he may be too unpredictable at this point to be someone she wants to have in her life. She supports what he’s trying to do, she wants him to survive, she likes and admires him, but she breaks up with him for the very valid reason that she doesn’t know how far he might go, or when he might break, or what kind of danger he may inadvertently place her, or himself, in next.

   By the time Claire runs into Luke in his show, she’s been around the block a few times. She’s gotten a bit more accustomed to danger, and she’s come to realize that a certain level of peril can be expected when superheroes show up. She has, to a certain extent, hardened herself to it. Heck, by this point she’s decided she wants to hang out around superheroes for a living! The idea of immersing herself in that world and all of the darkness that surrounds it isn’t as frightening as it was back in DD Season 1. More to the point, Luke doesn’t have all of Matt’s unresolved emotional turmoil. Luke questions his place in the world, he questions whether or not he wants to be a hero, but his actions and motivations are always clear. Claire supports him as a hero just like she supports Matt, but she also feels comfortable starting up a romantic relationship with him because he is generally more emotionally secure and consistent than Matt. He’s also much less likely to be killed in action, and she probably feels safer around him.