saw your post mentioning the potential length of their relationship and it really is something. it all seems fairytale esque for them to be together so long and I really hope the best for them. i really hope in 20 years I get to see them in interviews like.... we've been together for near 30 years and we can't wait for 30 more....
I think for me, as someone who is borderline monogamously challenged, it is almost unfathomable that you could meet someone at 16 and 18 and stay with them forever. I was still a virgin who had never had a boyfriend at both 16 and 18, so if someone told me this story without any context I’d be like
I had friends who were divorced by the time they were 24 so maybe I’m just cynical about relationships, but goddamn it when I see Harry and Louis look at each other I’m like
When I first started getting into One Direction I didn’t even have a Tumblr, I’d just go to Tumblr and search “larry stylinson” to see what was going on. I was like, “If I don’t make an account then I can’t technically be called obsessed.”
But we all know how well that worked out. I think actually at that point I had an account but never really used it, so then I was like, “Well if I don’t post about Larry then no one will know how much time I spend looking at posts about Larry.”
Again, that just…didn’t happen. But I’m glad it did eventually! I’ve met some of my best friends through Tumblr, so it’s all good.
Uhhhhh I think I was talking about Larry at some point…oh yeah! So when I first started to really fall down the Larry rabbit hole I did genuinely consider all the possibilities. My best friend and I growing up used to be asked all the time if we were dating but we were just hetero lifemates, well I say “lifemates” but we ain’t friends no mo so like “half of our life-mates”…another reason I’m like, “I just don’t know if people are meant to be with the same person for their entire life.”
However, I have been doing a lot of research about this kind of thing for my book (which you can pre-order now on www.beaslut.com by the way), and looked into Sternberg’s Triangular Theory of Love in which he says that love is comprised of three elements.
Intimacy is basically friendship…so do you get along with the person? Do you want to tell them everything all the time? Do you genuinely enjoy being together?
Passion and infatuation is sexual chemistry
And commitment is the part that I don’t understand because I’ve never been able choose a relationship over myself. I have had deep intimacy and passion with people but when it came to choosing to commit to altering our life plans to accommodate one another, it’s just never happened. I lived in five countries in one year, the fifth being California (which should be its own country really), and whilst I was extremely fortunate to be able to do that, there is no way I could have asked someone else to drop everything whenever I decide I’m bored and want to move every three months.
However…the amount of proof that Louis and Harry are continually choosing each other is quite prevalent all over their goddamn bodies.
Seriously, anyone who looks at a video of themselves and their partner like this after five years is probably doing okay
They’re literally as subtle as a shark attack when it comes to each other, so people dismissing it because Dan fucking Wootton told them to is just silly to me.
I can see how, if you were to only know about Harry and Louis through the media, you might certainly believe that they were just two bros chillin in a hot tub five feet apart cos they’re not gay. But if you are invested in this fandom and have all of this information at your disposal, I don’t particularly understand how one can completely ignore inconvenient things like tattoos or the bears.
What I did when first trying to figure out what the hell was going on was to say, “Okay if Larry is real that what doesn’t make sense?” And basically the only thing that didn’t make sense was their media images and narrative.
When I did the same by going, “Okay if Larry is not real then what doesn’t make sense here?” And you could write a novel of things that don’t add up. #welivetogetherdealwith it; “my son returns to his husband today”; next to you/you can’t sit together, WELLINGTON, tattoos, rbb and sbb, “larry ok”, bee tattoo, the two week rule, Jamaica, “Always in my heart @Harry_Styles yours sincerely louis”…
I was like
So yeah, I’m able to see beyond my own relationship incapabilities to recognise that they husbands.