because it took me forever to get it to my liking

So I finally watched yesterday’s clip and it was so underwhelming? Like for once I thought we would get some answers, there would be heart to hearts but instead there’s now just another plot?

And the fact that we’re on episode 6 and still feel like we don’t know anything about sana and her religion is so sad. It’s even worse when Muslims like myself are constantly asking for the Muslim representation. That’s not how it should be in a season about a Muslim WOC.

I’m just so disappointed at the writing and I want to learn more about Sana. She deserves a good season, not this love triangle, girls hating girls, always being overshadowed by others season.

My BTS Concert Experience

I just got home like half an hour ago because it took forever for my friend to collect her bag from the VIP place but anyway, here’s what happened:

  • I got to the arena with two friends
  • My phone died *le cries* I have to photos or videos but I’ll get my friends to send me some so I can share it with you
  • I part ways with my friends who are in a different section and get to my seat alone
  • The girls sitting next to me wanted me to move down one so their friend could sit in my seat but after the concert started the person who’s seat i was forced to sit in came back and I had to tell the girl in my seat to move back and they got really salty like hello it’s my seat. I do apologise to the girl who’s seat I was sitting in.
  • They opened with Not Today and when the pyrotechnics kicked in it finally hit me that this was actually happening
  • The fan chants were forgotten, there was too much hype
  • Baepsae was lit
  • I started dancing to Lie
  • I just sang along to all the songs
  • Cypher pt 4 was extra lit
  • Fire was incredibly lit
  • Started dancing when Danger came on
  • When BS&T came on the girl to my right screamed so loud that I became temporarily deaf
  • The wait for the encore was reaaaaally long
  • Jin showed us his heart wristbands and that was the cutest thing ever
  • They finally sang Spring Day
  • The concert ended and I was feeling very happy and sad
  • Waited over an hour and a half for my friends to get their bags
  • Went home

So yeah, all in all it was really fun! I loved seeing the boys in real life even though they were really far away from where I was sitting. I probably would have enjoyed it more if I wasn’t constantly reminded of deadlines and schoolwork, but that’s just me. I hope everyone else who went had a great time!

episode one :: Yuuri Katsuki is the most beautiful disaster that Victor has ever met in his entire life, and Victor has built his empire on beautiful disasters.



Victor isn’t sure he knows what he’s doing anymore by the time casting rolls around for season 22 of The Bachelor.  Okay, he knows what he’s doing, but it’s all autopilot.  He’s got a dossier of Chip Vanderbones and Tad Hardbeefs to look at, but is almost resigned enough to just give into Lilia and Yakov’s suggestion to cast Georgi Popovich, notorious histrionic Bachelorette season 10 runner-up, as this season’s lead out of sheer notgivingafuckness.  At this point Victor isn’t even sure whether he really wants to be in this game at all anymore, but what the hell else he would do besides sleep for a thousand years if he retired before thirty?  

And then Phichit Chulanont comes into his office to distract him during a conference call with Yakov to tell him a story about his friend who just crashed and burned at the Figure Skating Grand Prix Finals, and everything click click clicks into place: redemption narrative.  Twenty young men are going for the gold, but only one can win the heart of Yuuri Katsuki– he can hear the promos, see the character arcs unfold, and the narratives rush through him like they’ve always lived inside him and it feels–exciting.  

“Phichit,” Victor says suddenly, interrupting Phichit and grabbing him from across his desk.  “We have to get him.  He’s our next bachelor.”

“Oh my God,” Phichit replies, eyes widening, and then again, “Oh my God.

“Do you think you could get him?” Victor asks.  He’s seeing figure skating dates, thematic destination shoots in Chile and Finland and Iceland, “The Bachelor: Love on Ice” title screen flashing over two champagne glasses on the lip of an outdoor hot tub.  

“Do I think I can get him,” Phichit repeats dismissively, looking the closest to offended that Victor has ever seen him.  “What do you think you hired me for, Nikiforov.”

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Nine Months - Harry Styles Imagine

No piece of mine has never had as much interest surrounding it as this one has, so thank you for expressing your excitement to me. I hope you’ll find it was worth the wait. (Protip: if you’re reading on mobile, ditch the app and read on Safari or Chrome instead, as the app is prone to close on longer pieces of text).

This one is dedicated to @permanentcross, simply because she’s the best. E has listened to me ramble on and on about this story for longer than anyone should have to. She’s the inspiration behind many things beneath the cut, all of which I will leave up to your own interpretation. 

Without further adieu, I present you with Nine Months…

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Friendship Comes First:  What (Good) Fanfiction Can Teach Us About the Romantic Subplot.

I love all forms of storytelling:  television, books, movies, you name it.  As long as it’s quality, its ripe for the picking.  

It’s so easy for me to become engrossed in the lives and psychologies of fictitious characters, to care for them as though they’re people I really know.  Which, on some metaphysical level, I suppose is true, but that’s a topic for another essay.

However, in the midst of all my possibly Asperger’s-fueled hyper-fixation and nerdery, there’s one inevitable aspect of seemingly every plot to which I will almost always role my eyes and click the fast-forward button:  the goddamned romantic subplot.

So many times have I seen the exact same variation of romantic love between fifty homogeneous couples, and each time, I failed to see the appeal:  in books, the smirking, obnoxious male love interest will woo the object of his desire through flagrant disrespect, the same toned bodies will copulate furiously on my television screens (typically at the exact same moment my parents or small siblings will walk into the room), the same vapid, flirtatious stares and generic dialogue will be exchanged. 

But where’s the basis for it?  Yes, these people are stressed to be attracted to one another to the point of obnoxiousness, but do they even like each other as individuals?  Are they even friends?  Is there any three-dimensionality to their relationship besides sizing each other up and deciding to bump uglies? 

Simply and also sadly, the answer is very rarely.  And so, it seemed to me that romance was not my cup of tea, both in the fictitious world and out of it.  Or so it seemed.  

Because it was then, at approximately seventeen, that I discovered a remarkable phenomenon that would change my life forever:  fanfiction.  

Never before had I been so enraptured in the relationships of fictional characters, and I was baffled as to why.  Yes, I’ve read a tremendous deal of fanfiction that is, in fact, book quality, but as an avid bibliophile, I was perplexed as to why I’d never been so captivated by the romantic endeavors of a published author as I was by the passion-projects of writers not much older than I was.     

After a lot of time, careful consideration, and the illuminating words of some of my fellow bloggers, however, I believe I can finally put words as to why. 


1.  Give your characters a narrative purpose (besides being The Love Interest.) 

Do you ever wonder what inspires Supernatural fans to tirelessly churn out fics about their favorite human-on-angel pairing?  I have, and this is someone who’s a proud proponent of the stuff.  

The sheer magnitude of free literature available, constantly repositing the pair in all manor of situations and walks of life, is absolutely baffling, and undeniably impressive.  Indeed, some of the best works of romantic literature – and yes, I do consider fanfiction to be a form of literature – I have ever come across were starring none other than this specific pairing:  from the infamous Twist and Shout (which I don’t recommend if you ever want to listen to Elvis Presley music, visit a beach, or feel joy ever again) to the charming Have Love, Will Travel (probably my personal favorite), some truly beautiful love stories have blossomed from a pairing that has never even been confirmed onscreen to have romantic connotations.  

Perhaps just as baffling is the other end of the spectrum:  Lisa Braeden.  Lisa, for those unfamiliar, is basically posited as the love of Dean’s life, with whom he lived for a year before being forced to give up his dream of a family life and return to full-time demon busting.  They’ve canonically kissed, had sex, shared a bed, and everything typically associated with an onscreen couple.    

Yet comparatively no fanworks exist about them.  When Lisa does appear in a fic, she is usual Castiel’s rival for Dean’s affections, or simply a hapless bystander. 

Why is this?  Well, a disillusioned observer might point to straight women’s apparent predilection towards fetishizing male homosexuality (I, for the record, am not straight myself;  I’m a proud bisexual who, thus far, has only dated women.)  I’m inclined to retort that this isn’t giving female fans nearly enough credit. 

For starters, remove all context from each relationship and examine them with a critical eye:  on the one hand, you have Castiel, Dean’s angelic savior from forty years in perdition.  Castiel is clearly fascinated with Dean, appearing in his bedroom, somewhat suggestively (advertently or otherwise) inquiring about his dreams, watching him sleep, routinely invading his personal space, and ultimately rebelling against heaven in accordance with Dean’s wishes. 

On the other hand, you have Lisa, a perfectly nice character who’s introduced as “the bendiest weekend of (Dean’s) life” and…well, that’s about it.  She’s later shown as a sort of amalgamation of Dean’s subconscious desire for a mother figure and normal life, but she, as a character, remains somewhat underdeveloped and hollow. 

You can’t expect fans to hold the two relationships to the same caliber and then cry internalized misogyny and fetishization of gay and bisexual men when they don’t.

The fact of the matter is, onscreen “friendships” are typically much more developed, much more three-dimensional, and much more ideal of what a truly epic romantic plot should be.  A character with a clear place in the narrative and three dimensional characterization all their own will almost always be more charismatic than a character who’s introduced as exclusively The Love Interest.  

This is not to say that what makes fanfiction so great is that it sexualizes or romanticizes friendship.  In fact, I’m inclined to believe it’s the other way around.  

Which brings me to my next point…

2.  Make sure your characters are friends.

It’s a romance for the ages.  A love like no other.  They’re soulmates, yin and yang, a match made in the stars.

But do they enjoy each other’s company?  Laugh at each other’s jokes?  Take part in each other’s interests?  Are they even friends?  

The sad fact of the matter is, romance and erotica are, as a whole, starved for values of friendship and camaraderie. 

This is something I realized only after my love of fanfiction took root, when I tried to return to my normal sources of adult entertainment (romance, erotica, and porn) and found them, by comparison, almost bafflingly lacking in warmth and camaraderie.  

What I think makes fanfiction so addictive is the fact that it’s built upon the established relationships of two or more characters (the Onceler and company notwithstanding) who, typically, care for one another as friends and compatriots.  

Look at some of the internet’s favorite pairings:  Dean Winchester and Castiel remain a classic.  Bucky Barnes and Steve Rogers are always crowd-pleasers.  Kara Denvers and Lena Luthor are seeing a rise in popularity.  We all know Sherlock has somewhat fallen from grace, but the union of its two main characters still retains a devoted following.

This is no accident:  despite lacking onscreen confirmation, these characters have proven themselves to care for one another as more than objects of their sexual desire.  They’re friends, with relationships based in loyalty and warmth that are, unfortunately, sorely lacking in typical fictional romances.  

Once you get a taste of this brand of friendship-infused romance, in fanfiction or otherwise, it’s hard to go back.  

This isn’t just limited to quote-unquote “fanon” couples, either:  couples such as Mulder and Scully, Bones and Booth, Yuuri and Victor, and Ladybug and Chat Noir can all attribute their popularity to this strong basis in friendship, camaraderie, and mutual respect.

This is also the leading cause as to why the formerly booming 50 Shades franchise, and other arguably sexist, abusive dynamics, are struggling at the box office.  

Which reminds me… 

3.  Make sure your characters are equals. 

Unless you’re writing a Lolita-esque social commentary, it’s probably your best bet to keep your characters on fairly equal ground. 

I mean this in every sense of the word, too:  I have a difficult time getting invested in a romance when there’s a pretty blatant power imbalance, which oftentimes occurs due to the implicit sexism of the entertainment industry.

Disproportionately young actresses are assigned as love interests to much older men, such as Emma Watson’s twenty-something-year-old character lusting over a man almost twenty years her senior in Irrational Man.  

Physically mediocre or average-looking male characters are frequently pared with stunningly beautiful women who like them because they’re “nice,” fueling the existing mentality of all self-proclaimed “nice guys” who think society owes them a hot girl.

Furthermore, @popculturedetective just released an amazing video explaining the “Born Sexy Yesterday” trope, in which hopelessly naive, beautiful women are seen swooning over their more savvy male lovers.  (Found here:  https://www.youtube.com/watch?time_continue=2&v=0thpEyEwi80)

I love Splash and the Fifth Element as much as anybody, but both films incorporate all these tropes in ample proportions, and it’s frankly ridiculous. (On the topic of Splash, however, I’m greatly looking forward to a subversion of this trope in its remake, starring Channing Tatum as the titular merman and Julianne Belle as his human love interest.) 

On the other hand, you have fanfiction.  I’ve read numerous essays professing that fanfiction is becoming increasingly popular due to the fact that same-sex relationships tend to be implicitly devoid of these sex-based imbalances, and I’m inclined to agree.  

However, I’ve read others stating that male-male pairings tend to be so popular because male characters are typically more well-developed by writers, making it perfectly understandable that fans would be more invested in a possible romance between two characters of equal multidimensionality (see point 1) than one that is sorrowfully underdeveloped.  I’m inclined to think that this theory is even more on point.   

Because look at some of the successful onscreen relationships I listed prior:  we root for Bones and Booth’s inevitable union the same way we swoon over slowburn fanfiction, delighting in Mulder and Scully’s banter and craving their interaction.  

These are, in my opinion, some examples of straight couples done right, because they’re portrayed as friends (see the previous point), and just as importantly, as equals.  

Last, but certainly not least, the male characters in both pairings are depicted as having nothing but respect for their female compatriots, depending on their intellectual know how and not being ashamed to say so. 

A more contemporary example that gets this wrong?  Well, not to offend any fans of the pairing, but Mon-El and Kara, a la Supergirl.  Mon-El was, at the beginnings of his arc, consistently disrespectful towards Kara, putting her down and insulting her in the very same episodes in which her female compatriot – Lena Luthor – is shown vocally admiring and praising her.  

Mon-El has since improved on his behavior, but the damage is done:  I still have a difficult time seeing him as a likeable character, much less a suitable love interest for my beloved Kara.   


These are just a few recommendations, based on the ways in which my somewhat obsessive love of transformative literature (i.e. good fanfiction) have helped me as a writer and helped me view the implicit problems with mainstream romance with a more discerning and critical eye.

Here, I could provide a counterpoint with the recurring problems I’ve noticed in fanfiction, or I could go into some recomendations for writing explicitly gay and lesbian relationships.  Both of these, however, are topics worthy of another essay.

Disclaimer:  I am assuming that any and all readers are trying for an enjoyable, healthy romantic subplot with equally charismatic, consenting, and likable characters.  Dysfunctionality can be just as interesting from a literary standpoint, but again, this is a topic for another essay.


There will be essays like this published at least once every other week, so be sure to follow my blog and stay tuned for future writing advice and observations! 

13 Reasons Why

Thoughts on 13 Reasons Why characters and a rating of how much I dislike them from 1 being “my baby!!!!” to 10 being “FUCK THEM THEY CAN ROT” 

Hannah Baker: Didn’t deserve everything she went through especially rape. She pushed some people away though and sometimes she was kind of idk how to word it but I didn’t like stuff about her at times. Either way she deserved so much better than what she got. Deserved to be happy with Clay. 2/10.

Clay Jensen: Will fight anyone for Hannah. He was so shy around her and didn’t know what to do whenever he was with her, he’s so precious. Sometimes there were some things he did that didn’t sit right with me but he definitely deserved a happy ending with Hannah Baker; they deserved to be happy and in love and ugh. Also… took like 4823707592 years to listen to the tapes? 2/10.

Tony Padilla: Gay POC which I love because we need more of them. I love him he was so patient with Clay and all he ever did was try and protect Hannah’s wishes. Glad he shared the tapes with Hannah’s parents because they deserved to know why she killed herself instead of being left in the dust wondering why. I was always so happy when he came on screen. CLAY LISTEN TO THE GODDAMN TAPES. 1/10.

Jeff Atkins: My pure cinnamon roll, didn’t deserve to die because of a stupid girl who couldn’t own up to her mistakes. I hate how nobody including his parents and except Clay never knew he wasn’t drunk that night he died. Just wanted Clay and Hannah together. Your fave is problematic: uses “unique” 7 times in an essay. -5435973495797/10. I love him forever, hes so great. Never did anything bad.

Justin Foley: Didn’t deserve the home life he had BUT i really hated him for what he did to Hannah and the fact that he’s a rape enabler and a rape apologist like he literally let his best friend rape his unconscious girlfriend, covered up for him, and lied to her about it and then when she found out, he STILL was justifying what he and Bryce did by telling her that he didn’t tell anyone because Bryce does all this shit for him. KNEW that whatever happened at that party was fucking Jessica up but didn’t come forward until the very end. Claims he cared for her but you don’t do that shit to someone you claim you care about. Fuck him for that. 8/10.

Jessica Davis: She was so cool and nice in the beginning but then I hated how she got mad at Hannah and slapped her for the list instead of Alex, like really??? You think she asked to be on that list?? PLEASE. But after all that, she was still nice towards her and was never ill-mannered when it came to Hannah. Also, can we talk about how she didn’t deserve to be raped??? Justin Foley DEFINITELY didn’t deserve her. YOU GO GIRL. TELL HIM YOU NEVER WANT TO SEE HIM AGAIN. 5/10.

Alex Standall: He made some poor decisions making that list for a stupid reason and then letting Hannah pay the price. I somewhat like him though. I think he was a redeemable character and had a conscience (although it was too late, rip Hannah Baker) and felt that he needed to own up to it and tell the truth, was ready for whatever penalty he was gonna get. Was the only one (for a while) who thought what the others were trying to do was stupid. He definitely deserved better too, he didn’t deserve to shoot himself (or in other theories, didn’t deserve to be shot by Tyler). Please be okay…please be alive, baby. 4/10. 

Courtney Crimsen: GIRL, BYE. I hate and will always hate her character so much. Her and Bryce should just rot. She was a rape apologist and only cared about herself. Like girl I get that coming out is hard, I haven’t even done it, but to fuck up Hannah’s life like that? Are you serious? Justified Bryce’s actions to hide her truth. And she fucked up Jessica’s life too, in my opinion. She tried so hard to convince herself (and others) that Hannah was lying, Bryce isn’t a rapist, and that Jessica was never raped just so she can stay in the fucking closet. Like there’s nothing wrong with being gay. And she has two gay dads for fucks sake. 10/10 would always hate her again. 

Zach Dempsey: I think he genuinely liked Hannah but after all the shit Hannah had been through and the fact that his friends were his friends, I definitely see Hannah’s side of why she shot him down. I think he, himself, was lonely too but in different way; just because someone’s popular doesn’t mean they’re not lonely. Didn’t get compliments so he stole Hanah’s when she needed it most (I hate how he did that ugh like WHY…did you really need it?). Redeemable character, though. Also…HE KEPT HANNAH’S NOTE IN HIS WALLET!!! 5/10.

Tyler Down: Fuck him. A fucking creep. Like, he stalked people and took pictures of them when they were unaware (especially Hannah) and when she confronted him, HE FUCKING SENT THE PICTURE TO EVERYONE. Claims he “loved” Hannah but really?? FUCK HIM. Why did he even have so much guns? I’m pretty sure he’s planning a school shooting…fucking psychopath…”I can take care of myself” BOY BYE. And if he did shoot Alex, FUCK HIM EVEN MORE. 9/10.

Ryan Shaver: Didn’t respect Hannah’s wishes. Only cared about himself and poetry. Didn’t even care that Hannah didn’t want her shit to get out. I only liked him whenever he said Bryce is a rapist and that Courtney should just shut the fuck up and stop justifying Bryce’s actions. 8/10.

Marcus Cole: He cared more about himself and his reputation more than anyone. Thought he was the shit. Sexually assaulted Hannah then called her easy for refusing. 9/10.

Sheri: I liked her and she was genuinely nice but she crashed the stop sign and left a drunken Hannah at the scene and fled. Caused Jeff to die and I hate her for it. Though she reported it because she knew it was the right thing to do, it was already waaay too late. 6/10 because of Jeff.

Bryce: Rapist. Douchebag. Scum of the earth. He didn’t even think what he did was wrong. He raped two fucking girls and didn’t even feel remorse. He just thought every girl wanted him and that was that. I hate him so much, he can die. 102804802020x100000/10.

Mr. Porter: Could have tried better to stop Hannah from killing herself. She was set on suicide until she had doubts and needed just one person to help her and the one person she came to didn’t care enough to chase after her when she left his room that day. Worst. Guidance Counselor. Ever. 8/10.

5

Sketchdump 3 of Samurai Dad. This one is dubbed the “Dress Up” dump. Ever since the 6th episode with Ashi’s new hairdo and outfit, I was inspired to make nature outfits for all the girls, as well as changing their hair. You will bet that Jack would immediately scrub the “Aku” goo off of the girls. BTW, he’s not mad at them, he’s mad that toddlers were dropped into bubbling goo. Then I got the urge to draw the girls with all their new hairdos and outfits when they’re older. Unfortunately I don’t know whose name is who. Please forgive me, I didn’t have time to assign the listed names, because they never did so.

Neon-Cat-Headphones & grungy green clothes: The main tech and gear head. Tinkerer, inventor. Not a super genius, but still the main tech-head.
Blue Coat with blue eyeshadow: She takes care of all the makeup and beauty needs. Also the experimental chemist who makes dangerous makeup bombs. Her handbag is filled with things from knockout gas & acid, to humble eyeliner & blush.
Chun Li with roller shoes: The tech-head sister made those shoes especially for her. Those shoes are heavier than they look. She likes her snacks & food. 
Pink Sakura Tessen/ first one Jack killed: She loves her books and soaking up knowledge like a sponge. She’s a living encyclopedia.
The Falconer: Nuff said. She loves nature and all of its creatures. Especially birds. Can do almost any bird call.
The rebel graffiti ninja: The artistic graffiti rebel with a cause. The stunts she pulls is baffling, and she’ll get help from her sisters. The people who painted that Soviet star as Patrick Star? She’ll do that s#!t and more.
Ashi, the ladybug warrior: We all know Ashi. But I’d say she’s really dedicated to martial arts and the bushido code studiously. Still loves ladybugs.

The final pic took way long. They’re preparing and gearing up for the final confrontation. And Jack now has his sword back (FINALLY!)

I don’t know if I’ll do another Samurai Jack-based stream next week. It’s pretty much likely that I might just do that. Probably will stop after the hype dies down and the end is near.

To all the viewers who stopped by, thank you so much for putting up with my dry and boring self haha.

The heart beat

It happened again. The same painful disaster. It was happening everyday, so annoying, so unendurable. And to think, everything was so peaceful and nice for Bendy and Boris only a little while ago. Their lives were perfect, they didn’t have anything to worry about and have nothing to fear. Until Bendy got that illness. Everything changed for them both. Now instead of having fun and living their lives they had to put their effort into finding the lost items for the machine in order to save Bendy from all of this pain, and at the same time dealing with those two guys who were out to end them. This all has became an unbearable daily routine for both of them. Especially for Boris. Bendy wasn’t really worried for himself as much as for his bro, who didn’t have anyone else other than him. The older was trying not to pay too much attention to his condition and stay positive to not make his bro too anxious, and Boris also was trying not to think about it too much. At first it wasn’t too hard, but as this keeps happening more and more, Boris just couldn’t ignore it anymore. He was being really stressed and scared, even though he was trying hard not to show it off and not think about it. But this time that was exactly what he was doing, thinking about it. He was sitting on the grass, gazing at his beloved brother who was sleeping peacefully, lying his head on his shirt that he took off a moment ago when the pain attack kicked in again. This time, it seems to be worse than usual.

It was already late evening, but they were both still peppy and were still walking. Suddenly, Bendy curved with a painful groan, falling down while gripping to his stomach. Boris instantly ran towards his brother to help him. Bendy was shaking like crazy, he could barely make any sounds other than just squeaking, felt like something was blocking his breath. At one point, he just fell to his brother’s arms with no sound or movements. Boris started to freak out as he realized that Bendy was no longer trying to breathe, he wasn’t breathing at all! His panic level was increasing as the older one was still unconscious, he tried to pat him softly on the cheek but he was still not moving. Boris could no longer control himself, he started screaming and crying loudly as he was shaking his brother.
“BENDY!! BENDY, NO! COME ON! WAKE UP!! STAY WITH ME PLEASE!!!!” desperately pleaded Boris. Fortunately, the luck was on their side again. After few minutes, Bendy opened his eyes, taking a deep breath and started to cough constantly. He pulled his hand to his throat as a  stream of black liquid flowed down from his mouth to the ground. After that, he took a relived breath and lied on Boris’s lap. The pain was gone.

Bendy seems to be much better now. But not Boris, he was still terrified after what just happened, for a moment there, he actually thought that everything was over…and seems like Bendy was getting ready for that. For the last few days, Bendy was pushing his young brother much harder to be independent and self-capable. And that was showing the fact that he was ready to give up and die, or at least that’s what Boris thought. And  he couldn’t stand that thought. The thought of losing the one person he loved, the thought of never get to see his smile, hear his voice, never get to hug him, listen to his teaching or just goof around with him. And what will he do without Bendy? Where will he go? He could still try to find and fix the machine on his own, but what is the purpose if he already lost his beloved one? All of those thoughts were causing him a headache. His eyes started to tear up.
No… he is strong enough… he’s not gonna leave me… I know he won’t” silently sobed the young wolf while wiping his eyes.
He looked at his brother, who was still sleeping like a little baby. Boris slowly crawled next to him, trying to be as quite as possible to not wake him up. He seems so pacified, like he never got any deadly diseases. Boris moved his sight to Bendy’s exposed chest that was lowering and rising because of his breathing. He moved his head closer and placed his ear on it.

“Ba bump…” a quiet and pleasant sound is what he heard. The sound of a beating heart, his brother’s  heart.  The sound of life that he valued more than anyone else’s.  It was such a satisfying sound, just listening to that slow beat made Boris so relaxed. All the heavy thoughts were gone, all the worries been drawn away, all that he was thinking now is that his bro was still there, he was still alive. This fact was giving him hope that at one day, all of this pain and suffering would be over, and they will go back to those wonderful times when they could live peacefully with reasons to be nervous or scared.

Boris got carried away so deep in his thoughts that he didn’t realized how he lied down completely on his bro’s chest. He was brought back to reality when someone’s hand gently caressed his forehead.

“Boris, could you get up? You’re too heavy…” Bendy’s soft voice broke the silence. Boris instantly got up nervously rubbing the back of his neck.

“Sorry…” he said with a soft smile.

“What were you even doing?” the other asked.

“Nothing… I just wanted a hug!” childly answered Boris.

“*Yawn* you’ll get your hug tomorrow… I’m very tired…” wearily said Bendy as he flipped over to another side. “You should go to sleep too, it’s really late…”

“Okay” Boris lied down on his back next to Bendy, gazing upon the night sky. He felt much more confident about completing their quest. Only positive thoughts from now on, whining won’t get them nowhere. Other people deserves to be saved too, no one has to go through all this. Being with those who you love is the biggest treasure, and Boris was determined to keep his treasure. Forever.
“Good night Bendy! I love you ~” said Boris as he closed his eyes and start falling asleep.
“Mhmn… love you too, bro…” Mumbled Bendy through his sleep.
Tomorrow is a new day, new challenges to deal with, and new progress to make.

____________________________

Hello there! i’ll be frank, it’s not my first time writing fics, but it is my first sibmission to you!

sorry if there any mistakes i haven’t notice, English is not my first language (plus i’m pretty sure i’ve cheked everything) (⇀‸↼‶)

i fell in love with your AU and it gave me an idea for this “masterpeaceofshit” XP

i also wanna use this oppertunity to tell you dat you are my very favorite artist! your ideas and drawing are stunning and they always inspire me! thank you so much for sharing your work with us Rouge, u da best! (= ̄ω ̄=)

fic by katethepeach

art by Rouge

Jeff gets jealous after the two of you play spin the bottle

Originally posted by bluerangerpower

Request: “could u do a jeff atkins imagine where u guys are at a party w everyone else and he’s really cute w u and everyones playing spin the bottle and it lands on someone else, u can take it from there!“ 


You and Hannah were at Jessica’s party. Hannah decided she wanted to come because Clay invited her. Although it took some encouraging on your part for her to finally give in. You’ve been trying to set Hannah up with Clay since what seems like forever but she’s stubborn most of the times, claiming he "doesn’t like her that way”. 

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inspired by this video (sfw, but a sex toy is being used as car repair, so take that as you will)

“Laura’s gonna flip,” Derek says in dismay, looking at the huge dent in the driver’s side door of the Camaro. Her most precious possession, the car she’d been saving up for forever, the car she waxes and washes every weekend, the car that she let Derek borrow to go to the Mathletes competition in San Francisco because Derek had a basketball game on Friday and couldn’t make the official school bus, the car that Laura made him swear his life on, is now forever ruined.

“Damn, if there ever was a good place to curse, that would have been it,” Stiles says, crossing his arms and looking far more attractive than he had the right to. “C’mon, Derek. Just say it. Fuck.”

Derek blushes, watching the word tumble out of Stiles’ pink mouth. “No, I… there’s gotta be a way to fix it. But if I call her insurance people she’s gonna know…”

“It’s totally my fault,” Stiles says. “I was the one who wanted to go to Tastee Freeze on the way back, and let some dingbat hit you in the parking lot. Actually, it’s their fault, whoever can’t drive.”

Derek shakes his head. It’s his fault. He’d been having too much fun this weekend; he’d spent practically all of it with Stiles. He’d had a crush on him forever— in fact, joined Mathletes at his request, and the whole year of practice, of spending afternoons with Stiles poring over math problems, watching Stiles lick Cheeto dust off his fingers— it’s been too much. Coupled with the fact that Stiles actually just plain forgot to catch the bus on Friday, and then caught a ride with Derek, meant hours in the car listening to him sing along to Hamilton and muddle through the rap bits, and sleeping next to him in the four-to-a-room motel Saturday night, and waking up with Stiles’ face smashed into his shoulder.

Derek had been too overwhelmed by it all, too overwhelmed by Stiles. Getting the chance to spend time with his friend this weekend had just intensified his feelings, and he knows there’s no chance that Stiles will ever feel the same, so he’s just drinking it all in, savoring these moments when he can.

It had been a terrible parking job, the Camaro was at a weird angle, that’s why the person rounding the turn had hit him. Derek sighs. He guesses it’s for the best. He’ll just have to pay Laura back. For forever.

Stiles is studying the door, eyes narrowed in concentration. “Actually, it’s not that bad. They didn’t even scratch it. It’s just a dent. With the right amount of leverage…”

“I’m sorry, do you happen to have a magical car-door fixer in your overnight bag?”

Somehow, this causes Stiles to turn bright red. “Okay. I have an idea. But you have to promise not to laugh.”

“Okay…?”

Derek watches, perplexed, as Stiles pulls his duffle bag out of the back seat, and then rummages around in it.

“Promise not to laugh,” Stiles repeats.

“I promise.” Derek is confused, but sincere.

Stiles pulls a bright blue dildo out of the bag. It’s springy, and jiggles a little with the movement. There’s a thick vein running along the side, and the base even has… balls.

Derek’s brain short circuits, an image of Stiles, naked, working himself on the girth of the toy, his mouth open, panting, as he tries to get the right angle, skin flushed pink from pleasure…

“Fuck,” Derek says.

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So I took “and he gets really sad” to Langst levels because I have no control. 

A small case of the sniffles was nothing to Lance. He worked through it with ease, but when he woke up two days later with a throat so raw and so sore that it brought tears to his eyes, he began to second guess himself.

However, he still tried to power through, but halfway through breakfast, his weak, raspy voice gave out entirely when he was in the middle of reassuring Shiro that he just had a small cold.

He tried to talk, but all that came out was a soft squeak that left him wincing.

“Just a cold, huh?” Keith asked, one eyebrow arched in a teasing manner.

Lance huffed and poked at his throat. He cleared his throat and tried once more to respond vocally, but it was helpless and quite painful.

“You better not,” Shiro warned. “You’ll only make it worse.” He held an index finger up to his mouth, motioning for Lance to keep quiet.

Lance sighed, shoulders slumping in defeat. For the remainder of breakfast, he shoved his food around his plate with his fork as the others chattered around him as if nothing was wrong.

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anonymous asked:

Can we all take a moment to appreciate Blue and Lance bc. Yes they're The Ultimate Bromance™

blue and lance are ??? probably one of my favourite dynamics???


  • Lance totally vents to Blue about anything tbh.
    • First it’s because he wants to try and bond with her and then it’s because she won’t tell him to shut up if he keeps talking (there’s always a risk of that with people. Everyone gets annoyed eventually - it’s not their fault). 
    • Eventually it just becomes routine. Blue always sends these ideas to him – feelings and thoughts and concepts, and they feel like home. 
  • Blue does this thing in battle where she doesn’t tell Lance what to do, she just hints at things. 
    • She’s a little cryptic sometimes and it drives Lance nuts, but it’s worth it for the surge of pride he gets after he realises what she’s hinting at.
  • Blue’s a hidden savage tbh. 
    • Lance was mid-training session with everyone once and he and Blue were completing a loop. Lance was basically neck-and-neck with Keith, but Keith was just pulling ahead. 
    • Keith was like “guess you’re too slow to catch up, huh? Where’s all that gracefulness now?” and Lance was about to bite back with an excellent comeback, but then Blue transmitted this image and it was of Keith wandering past her in the hangar, tripping over his own feet and wiping the fuck out, and Lance actually fucking lost it.
  • When Lance gets super tired and lonely sometimes he clambours up into Blue and settles down in the cockpit. 
    • It’s not very comfortable which is why he now has as many blankets as he can safely fit in one of the storage closets. It feels like home though.
    • Blue regulates the temperature to make Lance feel extra cozy. Hidden bonus. 
  • Lance calls Blue so many nicknames it’s actually nauseating for everyone else.
    • At first everyone thought Lance was hitting on Allura again when he said “of course, beautiful” over the comms after she gave an order, but it turns out he was talking to Blue.
    • Honey, beautiful, baby girl, gorgeous, big blue, babe, darling, and when they’re alone and he’s feeling extra homesick: mi corazón. 
  • For ages Lance feels insecure because he thinks he and Blue have the closest bond but Blue never comes to rescue him like Red does for Keith.
    • He totally bottles it up and Blue knows there’s something wrong (they’re two halves of a whole) but she’s a giant lion, and whilst sentient, can only do so much. 
    • Eventually he tells her the truth because he’s shit at keeping secrets and she does her best to send concepts and images to him to help him understand. 
    • He eventually understands the reason she doesn’t jump into action to save him all the time is because she trusts him to find a way out of danger, to figure out a solution, to use his excellent tactical brain and figure out the best strategy for his crummy situation. 
      • (But because she recognises simply showering him in praise won’t do as much help as action, the next time he’s truly in danger she’s launching herself out of standby and landing, crouched over his injured form. Lance doesn’t stop smiling for a week). 
Redemption // Jeon Jungkook

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the prompt: Jungkook scenario when your pregnant unplan baby he finds the test when you get home he starts yelling, blaming you throwing things,tells you to gtfo of his life with the baby saying fucked up things. So you leave Korea 3 year later you come back with your daughter and you guys see each other again he tries to win you back angst beginning but fluff ending?

words: 8942

category: heavy angst + fluff ending

author note: it’s time to see how good destinee’s character development skills are. also y/n didn’t leave, jungkook did. hope that’s okay. im so proud of myself for writing this?? I didn’t give up and I’m glad i didn’t. anyway, this took forever to write you can literally see my writing improve as you keep reading its kind of funny anyway let’s go!

- destinee

Originally posted by sugutie

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Supercorp/Karlena: There is no platonic explanation for them

Let’s break it down and look at the facts:

  • They believed in one another right from the start despite having only just met.
  • Lena personally inviting Kara to her Gala - showing up at her workplace to invite her (when she probably could have sent an email or a text)
  • Lena looking jealous before she knows that Alex is Kara’s sister
  • The lip biting™
  • How their smiles are the brightest around one another
  • They have saved one another from dying
  • Lena filled Kara’s office FULL of flowers
  • They were going to have a kombucha date
  • Kara defends Lena so hard despite having “video evidence” that says otherwise
  • Kara flies to save Lena despite the fact that she could die
  • Lena works into the night to help Kara
  • Lena’s reaction to Supergirl/Kara getting hurt
  • Kara getting flustered when Lena compliments her
  • Lena validates Kara in her every day life not just as Supergirl
  • The playful banter/teasing
  • The gayze™
  • Kara being the first person Lena calls for advice
  • Lena calling Kara back to check if she was okay
  • Them handling their disagreements with maturity and mutual respect
  • Kara acting jealous around Lena’s ex and Winn
  • Kara knowing Lena was innocent because she looked at her
  • Lena looking like she wants to kill Snapper when he disrespects Kara
  • The unnecessary gay angst in this scene
  • How they open up to one another and have deep and meaningful conversations
  • The closeness of this hug *squishy face hug*
  • Lena walking into Kara’s apartment like it’s her own and immediately sitting down
  • Kara assuring Lena that she will protect and support her on multiple occasions
  • and….

the bridal style carry

I rest my case.

A Little Something About The Tangy and The Tart

I cannot believe it has been so long since I posted and I’m sorry, truly, that it’s taken me forever and a day to get my ass in gear. But due to recent events, I felt inspired to write something and I’m actually really, really happy with how this turned out!

Also, I owe a huge thank you to @permanentcross for giving me advice and reassuring me this wasn’t crap and to @canistay-haz for being her wonderful, loving self and telling me I don’t suck. You both are so, so lovely and I’m lucky that I can ask you for advice when I’m not confident in my writing.

That being said, enjoy!

Warning: NSFW

Masterlist


Normally, Saturday mornings would be reserved for sleeping in, lazy kisses, and barely audible gasps filling your ears. Today however, you and Harry had to be somewhat functioning adults. You were having one last get together with Harry’s closest friends and family before his life was sent into the spotlight for who knows how long, and he didn’t get to be as free and open with his time as he had been. 

You woke up about half an hour after Harry did, knowing you had things to do and people to see but you were having none of it. All you could think about was the slight yet very-much-still-there tingling sensation between your legs thanks to yours and Harry’s late night rendezvous. You smiled to yourself, rolling over and letting your face collide into Harry’s pillow, inhaling his lingering scent that made you want him all over again… 

You made your way downstairs to your boyfriend, legs bare and torso covered in his ridiculously baggy pink shirt that was littered with the white polka dots, your rear just barely peeking out at the bottom hem. Harry was sporting only a pair of grey joggers that hung much too low on his hips, not that you were complaining. 

“Morning, sunshine.” You wrapped your arms around his waist, peppering his back with tiny pecks.

“G’morning, poppet. Sleep okay?” Every morning after, without fail, he asks how you slept. He asks because he knows when you’re both in the heat of the moment, sex isn’t gentle. Not that it’s animalistic, but you and Harry like what you like and making sure you’re comfortable and properly taken care of after is an essential part of his aftercare routine; he’ll be damned if he doesn’t take care of you and pamper any part that might be slightly bruised or extra loved on. He does love a routine after all…

“Mhm,” you purr into his back, pecking his skin once more before he spins around in your grasp, your arms falling to your sides while he places one hand on your cheek and encloses your mouth with his.

“Good,” he smiles down at you, pecking your cheek before turning back to the countertop where you can see he’s been preparing a dessert for the get together later that night. 

“Whatcha makin’?” you ask, hopping upon the countertop, legs swinging back and forth while eyeing the bowl of plain raspberries and the graham cracker crust that was still sitting in the tart pan Harry insisted he needed.

“How does a raspberry tart for tonight sound? Bought the pan, figured there was no use in letting it sit in the cupboard.”

You couldn’t help but stifle a giggle. There was nothing comical about the dessert in and of itself, but you were feeling some type of way this morning and you couldn’t help but think of it in a provocative way.

Harry rolled his eyes, trying not to grin, “Why is that funny?”

You just giggled again and reached to kiss him on the cheek, “Maybe I wanna be your little raspberry tart. I already have the perfect shirt on.” Although you’d been sitting on the countertop for a good minute already, Harry had just noticed how his shirt had ridden up your thighs and he swallowed hard, also taking in how you had only the bottom two buttons fastened and there was little, if anything, left to the imagination. What Harry didn’t know was that you didn’t have anything covering the part of you that wanted him the most; he figured you’d just thrown on something skimpy just to torture him but no, you were completely bare, apart from the bottom of the hem under your bum, and sitting on your boyfriend’s counter. Harry didn’t have a prayer. 

You smirked at him cheekily and even though you’d had him not even eight hours before, he could tell you still had an appetite for something else, something that filled you in a different way. 

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Butterfly wings

Allura:
When Lance was a kid his mom would say his skin looked like the wings of a butterfly.
Something that was beautiful in how the colours stood out over the base.
She would tell him that he was her little butterfly painted by the angels.
She would tell him this everyday he came home crying because of the teasing from the other kids and the pitying looks from the adults.
When Lance turned ten he stole his sisters makeup and used it to cover the pale areas that were visible on his face, neck and arms. Just to see what it would be like he went to town and for the first time ever blended in. He felt absence of confidence coming from the makeup. But he didn’t want to upset his mom. However getting makeup off is much harder then putting it on.
That’s why hours later his Mom found Lance in the bathroom desperately scrubbing at his skin as she called him for dinner.
He broke down and began to cry begging her not to angry for trying to cover up.
His mom just smiled and kissed his temple telling him that if he wanted to cover up he could or if he wanted his skin on show that was fine too, that he was perfect ether way.
So Lance started wearing makeup and gained a new kind of confidence that he never had before. He was louder and happier even flirting.
When he went away to the Garrison he took enough makeup with him to last until Christmas telling himself as long as he had makeup then everything would be ok.
But the night they found Shiro, Lance didn’t have his makeup with him.
He went to space without it.
With every day that passed the small container he always carried for touch ups became emptier and emptier. He knew it wouldn’t last forever but tonight of all nights to run out.

Lance stared in the mirror at the pale splattering that stretched over his eyes as he desperately rubbed at his skin praying to be able to cover up.
But it was no good.
He was out of makeup.
He wondered if Allura had any and if she would mind him borrowing some. But if he asked then she would see.
What if she laughed?
What if she told the others and they treated him differently?
He couldn’t take the teasing again he just couldn’t.
He put his hands on the sink trying to will himself to calm down. If he could just get to Allura’s room then he could steal her makeup and look normal.
Wrapping his blanket round his head allowing it to trail along the floor behind him Lance tip toes through the hall way.
At this time in the morning most of the other paladins were usually in the kitchen having breakfast or for Keith getting in some training before grabbing a quick bite to eat. This didn’t do much for Lance’s anxieties through. Just the thought of being outside his room without makeup on caused his chest to tighten with panic.
This was so much worse.
He felt like every cell in his body was on edge, vibrating with fear of being caught.
When he reached Allura’s room he had to wipe the sweat off his hands before getting the door open.
Allura’s room was huge.
Much bigger then all the paladins rooms combined and filled with various alien nick nacks and photos from Altea.
Lance felt bad about being in her room without permission, but he told himself it would be worth it in the end.
However after almost an hour Lance had found nothing.
No concealer.
No powder.
Nothing.
He felt his chest tighten as the tears began to fall.
What was he going to do?
The team already thought he was nothing but a pretty face, he’ll be even less then nothing if they realise he’s not even that.
As his breaths came less frequently and quicker Lance slowly slipped down to the floor holding his throat with his hands.
He didn’t hear the door slide open.
He didn’t hear the gasp or the sound of footsteps running over to him.
But he did hear his name.
“Lance?” Allura asked panic clear in her voice. She put a steadying hand on his shoulder trying to get him to look up at her. “Lance tell me what is wrong! Are you hurt? What happened?” She asked sounding like a worried mother.
Lance’s only response was a slow shake of the head.
Allura recognising the panic attack hugged him in her strong arms humming a calming tune.
After a while the tears stopped and Lance found himself able to breath normally again. He stayed in Allura’s arms letting her rock him gently back and forth closing his eyes and listening to the calming sound.
“Pretty song” Lance whispered.
“My farther would sing it to me when I was young.” Allura answered a note of pain to her voice. “Ready to tell me what’s wrong?”
Lance shook his head earning him a sigh from the princess.
“Well…is there anything I can do to help?
Lance was quiet for a moment “do you have any makeup I could borrow?” He asked nervously playing with the hem of the blanket.
“Of course. But I do not understand, you often boast about how perfect your skin is.”
A bitter laugh escaped Lance’s throat. “My skins ugly.”
Allura was so surprised by this answer she pulled back just to try and see if the blue paladin was joking. He had to be joking…right?
“Lance why would you think that?” She asked gently.
Lance slowly, very slowly looked up. The blanket falling off his head and showing his face to the older woman.
Allura couldn’t stop the gasp that escaped her lips as she stared at Lance.
His face began to crumble “I knew it! I knew this would happen!” He sobbed curling in on himself.
“No no lance I didn’t mean anything bad!” Allura rambled quickly. “It’s just I did not realise humans also had marks of beauty like Altean’s.”
Lance sniffed looking up at her “marks of beauty?” He asked.
“Yes” she tapped the pink marking on her cheek “on Altea it was a sign of beauty to have markings such as yours on your face. They called them marks of the Drioborn bug… I believe you have something similar on Earth. Butterfly I think they are called.”
Lance smiled for a moment “yeah butterfly is right.”
After his little heart to heart with Allura, Lance though still self conscious didn’t outright hate his skin anymore. He borrowed her makeup as to feel more confident but eventually he opened up to the team allowing himself to love who he is as much as his team does.

My Introduction into the LGBTA+ Community

This came to me while in the shower. I nearly forgot about it but now I can’t forget it and I think it’s important.


Back when I was a small eighth grader, my Christian school asked me to go to a local fair and hold a book reading for kids. I was super excited and said yes right away. I got there, read a book or two, then I had a half hour break. I walked around and saw a sign that said ‘ART!!! X% OF PROCEEDS GO TO CHARITIES TO HELP LGBTA+ MINORS!!“. I don’t remember the exact percentage, but I remember thinking "Art??? I love art!!”

I walked over to the tent where there were two people. One girl with dark purple hair, and another 'girl’ (in quotes for a reason) who had a shaved head. They were in highschool and I was terrified… They were the big kids at a PUBLIC SCHOOL!!! I asked them what lgbta+ meant because I wanted to know where my money was going.

They said “Lesbians, gays, bisexuals, transexuals, ace/aro, and others!” And I’m like??? There’s more than just gay??

They laughed and said yes, asked me my orientation (straight then) and introduced themselves. (I’ll use their traits as names) Purple was a girl, and pansexual, which she explained meant she could love anyone no matter what. (Anyone? I asked. Yep! She said smiling. I just care if you’re kind). She has a girlfriend who was a lesbian.

Artist (the persons who art was being sold) was nonbinary and bisexual. They explained what they meant, and how bi was different from pan. But I was confused about nombinary. I told them I didn’t understand how you could be nothing! They smiled softly and told me this.

“It’s okay if you don’t understand! It can be confusing. All the matters is that you’ll treat me like everyone else.”

We talked until I had to go back, but on all my breaks I went back to them. I told them how my mom was at my stand and wouldn’t be happy if she knew I was there. They told me about highschool and art and lgbta+. I ended up buying two pieces from her. One I’m not a huge fan of bc I grew out of the style but the other I still have hanging up after almost five years.

At some point, I had to leave. They hugged me, wished me luck in life, and we parted ways.

I was packing up when I saw a huge floppy sunhat come into my tent. It was Purple and Artist, who got a huge hat so my mom wouldn’t see their “boy hair cut”. They said hello, pretended not to know me, but slipped me a slip of paper, smiled, and walked away. I opened it to see a drawing of a hotdog Artist drew me (I let calling every dog a hot dog because it was very hot outside). On the bottom was a small heart.

This is so important to me. Those people could’ve easily brushed me off as just a kid who is sheltered and bigoted. But they didn’t. They took me in for the day and (most likely painfully for them) explained everything and answered all my questions. I don’t think I’d be on terms with my sexuality without them.

Long story short, always be nice. Have patience, be kind, and never get short with kids, teens, or even adults who just want to learn or are under informed. Or even if they don’t understand some things, like how I was at first with nonbinary.


Always be patient, always be kind. Anything you say or do can impact someone forever.

Need a hand (Zach DempseyX Reader )

Originally posted by oliviagrey3

Request; Hey could you do  a  Zach Dempsey smut where you find him jerking off and offer to help him. Also i really love the Musical fingers imagine.Btw I don’t know if you do 13rw Characters but if you don’t you could just turn it into a reggie mantle one Thanks in advance.

A/N; Let me tell you guys how this is another version of this imagine because the first one I  was doing  my computer shut down in the middle of it so I had to  rewrite the whole thing but  yesss   I do 13rw imagines I love that show and all the characters.In other news I write other things not just smut. I can write fluff romance drama just tell me what you want  sis or bro. Idk ask for a part 2 if yah want i lowkey feel this is short but at the same time long idkk

REQUEST ARE OPEN

Warnings;smut,sin, sin,sin ,more sin, jacking off ,blowjobs  blah, blah, blah

Part two

Originally posted by theworldisworthagif

It was a sunny Sunday afternoon one of those day in April when the weather is cooperating. A day meant to go out , the park. shopping , walking  it doesn’t matter as long as you go somewhere to enjoy the weather.Where was I going not anywhere I wished to go. I was walking down the street no not on my way to the park to enjoy this lovely warm weather instead I was stuck studying for a final tomorrow with my study partner Zach Dempsey. Yes you heard right the Zach Dempsey star player of the basketball team.Unlike his teammates he was actually I laid back guy.He knew what mattered.He was pretty smart for a sports guy, He worried about his grades as much as he worried about sports.He wanted to be a biologist or something like that. He told me on one of our study session, I honestly can’t remember correctly maybe I was too busy drooling over the hottie, maybe that’s the problem I’m too  distracted by him. I mean the guy is fit from head to toe, I guess sports really do pay off. Oh if he knew the dreams I have about him and how I fantasize over his lips being on  mine. Zach and I have weird friendship  we are always flirting with each other and making sexual innuendos but we have never made contact that wasn’t just the friend type even though I wished we had. I was early to our study date I was sure Zach wouldn’t mind my parents went out and I didn’t want to be home alone. Zach has texted me earlier to just walk in when I got there. Zach parents were out of town and they took  his little sister with them so it was just going to be me and Zach.I reached the long driveway of the Dempsey home and decided to let myself in.Walking up the driveway I remember all the time Zach has come to open the door for me.How  he’s always wearing a shirt that hugs his bodily perfectly showing off all his muscles and how his sweatpants always hang low on his hips. He looks mesmerizing each time. I reach the door opening it slowly trying to  remember the way to Zach’s room. I’ve been in this house couple of time but the house is a mansion figuring out your way through it is like trying to get out of a maze each time.Making my way up the endless stairs I start to remember the way to his room. When I reach the top of the stairs I hear a something that sounds exactly like a moan. Immediately  I regret my decision of showing up early. What if Zach had someone over? I wouldn’t want to interrupt anything.My mind told me to get out of there but my feet wouldn’t listen they had a mind of their own and I slowly walk towards the door Zach moans got louder and I gotta admit they sounded enticing.Tempted to see what was happening inside I decided to look through the breach of the door. The view was captivating and alluring, Zach was pleasing himself his muscles clenching his hair was damped  and little droplets of sweat decorated his forehead and his eyebrows were furrowed.His hand moving up and down his exquisite cock and in that moment I desired that my mouth was his hand. As a gasp left his mouth I couldn’t hold it any longer my heart palpitated and I felt my body heat up the place in between my legs throbbing for attention.A sudden wave of confidence flowed through me as I stepped into the room speaking up.

“ Need a hand “ I say confidently

Zach is shocked he pulls his pants up in one swift movement turning the chair to face the opposite way that i’m standing.

“ wha… what did you say ?” he says stuttering

I start walking towards him “I asked if you needed help with that” I said standing in front of him. I sit on  his lap and slowly kiss his jawline

Originally posted by relacion-goals

“ like I said I could help but only if you want” I swing my legs to straddle him and get close to his ear I start nibbling on it slightly “Let’s be honest Dempsey you want this as much as I do so what are you waiting for” I say and I start kissing his jawline again.He grabs my hips firmly making me me grind on his bulge. I let out a gasp from the sudden contact. we craved each other. I look up at him his eyes darker full of lust the intensity between us growing. He harshly pulls my face to his crashing our lips together  and a surge of electricity runs through me.The kiss was passionate and lustful at the same time. Like we had been waiting for this forever and like it will last for eternity. I pull away short of breath and see Zach smirking.

“You have no idea how long I’ve been wanting to do that for” he says panting.I get on my knees making eye contact with him eager to have his luscious cock in my mouth my core burning with desire at every touch.I glidle my hand across his bulge and he hisses. I massage it slowly through his boxers. The anticipation of having him in my mouth is killing me but I also want to tease him. I slowly pull down his sweats and he kicks them off he’s only in boxers now giving me a better view.I take off his boxers looking up at him and batting my lashes I take him in my hands and he bucks his hips upward putting more of himself in my hand I pump him a few times before putting his savory tip in my mouth  a suck the tip slowly and he lets out a throaty moan. I take him in my mouth as much as I can slowly bobbing my head up and down  he starts thrusting his cock in my mouth making me moan which sends vibrations onto him.He forcefully pulls my hair into a pony tails guiding me. He hits the back of my throat and I gag. I can hear him cursing under his breath and I know he’s close. The view is consuming , he’s furrowing his eyebrows his mouth slightly open letting string of curse words fall from it once in awhile I moan at the thought of having him come undone inside my mouth. I feel him twitch so I moan again. I feel his milky liquid in my mouth and  I greedily savor his taste, his delicious cock still throbbing in my mouth.He lets go of my hair I wipe the corners of my mouth and get up.I sit on his lap again pulling his lips to mine kissing him passionately.

“Damn Y/N I didn’t know you were such a freak”

he says still short if breath

“Actually there a lot of things you don’t know about me Dempsey” I say smirking.I get up from the chair and start walking towards the door but Zach grabs me and throws me on the bed pinning me down.

“now its my turn to make you feel good” he says kissing my neck

Originally posted by sensuous

Give me a break.

Hii! I know it’s been forever since I wrote something and I’m very sorry. There’s been so much on my mind lately and so many things that made me feel overwhelmed and I just needed to sort it out. This is kind of very loosely based on ‘Love me or leave me’ by Little Mix because someone requested it. I hope you like it. I plan on writing a second part.xxx

“Well, maybe I don’t fucking care anymore!”
It seemed like his booming voice made the whole house vibrate. It seemed like it cut right through Y/N. His words felt like he took a knife and rammed it into her heart and to top it all off he twisted it slowly so the pain had time to spread.
These last weeks felt like nothing but pain for her. He was never home and even when he was he somehow wasn’t. She let him in and he pushed her away. He pushed her so far away she couldn’t feel him anymore.
“Why are you still here then!?”
She had had enough. If he didn’t care anymore he could walk out the door and never come back.
Harry scoffed, turned around and walked up the stairs. When he slammed the bedroom door shut Y/N could feel the last bit of connection between them slipping away completely.
It’s never been this harsh. They slammed doors and yelled hurtful things before but it’s never been like this. Somehow this felt final.
She didn’t know how it happened, how everything between them began to crumble. But it did.
She didn’t feel his loving touch in at least three months. She didn’t hear his loving words in at least three months.
They fought almost every day and when they didn’t fight they didn’t talk to each other at all. Mornings were spent alone and cold, both waking up at their own times without a good morning kiss or a cuddle or anything at all. Nights were even worse. They went to sleep in the same bed but facing away from each other. They never solved their problems before bed. They broke their rule every single night and went to bed angry.
And even though right now Y/N might think it would be better if their paths would part she also knew she wouldn’t recover from it. Harry was the love of her life. She knew she could never be happy without him.
And so she broke down. Ugly sobs and fat tears. The whole weight of the last few months finally got too much and she couldn’t take it anymore. She was sure she’s never cried this much in her entire life. She was sure she never felt so hurt but numb at the same time before.
She didn’t know what the hell went wrong. What she did to push him away. What she did that made him stop loving her.
He doesn’t love you anymore.
Those were the words that constantly replayed in her head, after every fight.
He hates me.
She couldn’t find another explanation. That was the only reason she could think of as to why he wasn’t interested in fixing things between them.

When she met him she was sure he was the most wonderful person she’s ever met. He looked at her as if she was the most important thing on earth. He cooked the most delicious dinner for her. He held doors for her. He made her laugh and feel appreciated.
When she really got to know him she was knocked off her feet. He was the most gentle and loving man she could have ever imagined. He was there for her. He was the place she ran to when the world overwhelmed her. He was her happy place. Her home.
When things got a bit rough they stuck together. They were a team. They faced everything together and fought through it.
Y/N was the happiest girl ever. She thought she found her forever. Her happily ever after.
Until the perfect relationship began to change into great, then good, then normal and then…
Into whatever they had now.
She couldn’t take it anymore. And the worst thing was that there was no way out of this hell. They can’t go back to where they’ve once been. And parting ways? No fucking way could she survive without him.

It was three hours and twenty tissues later when Harry finally exited the bedroom and came down the stairs. Y/N was standing in front of the big living room window which had a view over what seemed like half of London. Her back was turned to Harry, her hair messy and her frame slightly shaking.
She knew that whatever would come now would change everything. She knew that they reached a point were something had to happen. Anything.
Harry took a deep breath and took the last few step towards her. Y/N closed her eyes when she felt his warmth. She hadn’t felt it in so long.
When he reached his hand out thread his fingers through hers she flinched. Harry could feel his heart breaking at her reaction to his touch. He closed the gap between them and pressed his chest flush against her back. That’s when Y/N started to cry again. Her whole body shook with the force of her tears and the whimpers and sobs seemed to get louder with every passing second.
“Shhh.” Harry tried to calm her and finally wrapped his arms around her from behind.
He nuzzled his face into her neck where she always smelled so good and that’s when he realized how long he hasn’t done that.
Y/N moved her arms so she could intertwine both her hands with his. She didn’t remember the last time she held his hand. She used to love his hands so much, always playing with his fingers and kissing his knuckles.
Harry kept pressing tiny kisses to her shoulder and squeezed her tighter to him every time a whimper left her lips.
They stood like that for at least ten minutes before Y/N turned around in his arms and hugged him again. He wrapped his arms around her shoulders, his hands stroking softly over her back while her hands were fisting his shirt. She couldn’t get close enough. She needed him closer. Her hands wandered down underneath his shirt to touch his skin. Harry shuddered when her cold hands touched his skin but he knew she needed this. She hasn’t felt his skin in forever. It almost felt foreign.

When they finally pulled away from each other both of them were scared to let go. This couldn’t be it. They needed each other.
“We have to talk, Harry.” she whispered and pressed her forehead against his.
“I know, my love.”
My love. Was she still his love?
She thought he hated her.
They sat down at the kitchen table across from each other. Both of them couldn’t be fast enough to reach out for each other again and when their hands bumped against each other they both laughed softly. For the first time in months.
None of them wanted to be the first to say anything. Until Harry finally couldn’t take the silence anymore.
“I didn’t mean anything that I said earlier. Or… in the last few weeks. God, what is happening with us?”
“I don’t know, Harry. But it can’t keep going like this. I can’t take it anymore.”
“Me neither, love. I know I didn’t show how much it was affecting me but I want you to know that I feel just as broken as you do.”
Broken. Is that what they’ve become?
“I… I thought you hated me. During all these times you pulled away or turned your back towards me, I thought you hated me.”
Harry’s free hand reached out to hers so he could clasp her hand in both of his.
“I never ever hated you. Not for a second. And I never will.”
Y/N felt like a huge weight was lifted from her shoulders and she felt like she could breath again.
“I love you so much, darling.” Harry whimpered.
Her head snapped up so she could look at him and when she saw tears running down his cheek she reached over the table to wipe them away.
“I love you too, Harry. So much.”
Harry removed her hand from his face and pressed gentle kiss to ever knuckle.
“What are we going to do, love? I want to fix this. I want to go back to being the happiest couple ever. I want to go back to being happy with each other.”
“Me too, Harry. God, I’d do everything to get back to what we once had.”
They stared into each other’s eyes until Y/N cleared her throat and diverted her eyes to the table.
“I-I think we need a break.”
Harry’s whole world stopped in that moment. His mouth fell open and his brows furrowed. He pulled his hands from hers and a breathless ‘no’ left his lips.
“No.” He repeated after a moment.
“No way.”
“Harry, listen. I-”
“No!” he shouted.
Y/N flinched and her ears began to ring like every time he raised his voice at her. Her eyes closed and tears began to dribble down her cheeks.
“Do you think I’m stupid? I know exactly what’s going to happen when we do that. You’re going to realize just how unhappy I make you and that you are so sick and tired of me and you’ll never come back. Or you’ll find someone else who makes you laugh more than I ever did. God, I’m going to be gone for two weeks for promo. Is that not enough distance and space for you?!“
“Harry, I need time okay? I need time to take care of myself. I need time for sorting things out. I need time so that this all can work again and if you’re honest, you need it too.”
He laughed humorlessly and crossed his arms over his chest.
“You will have that time when I’m gone.”
“I-I don’t think two weeks are going to be enough.”
His eyes caught hers and she swore she’s never seen him look at her like that. So sad but angry at the same time.
“L-Longer?”
“Two weeks are nothing, Harry.”
“There’s been times when you couldn’t go a single day without me. There’s been times where two weeks without each other seemed like the end of the world.”
She closed her eyes and tried to control the tears which constantly blurred her sight.
“I don’t think we can sort anything out in two weeks.”
“I don’t think we can sort anything out when we’re away from each other.”
“Harry, please.”
He closed his eyes briefly and sighed.
“How long?”
“T-Two months?”
“No fucking way!”
This time it was Y/N’s turn to sigh.
“Harry, I-”
“One month. And not a single day longer.”
She caught his eyes for a moment before she nodded.
“Alright.”
They sat in silence for several minutes, both didn’t know what to say.
“I-I thought I’d stay in a hotel for the two weeks before you’re gone and then I’ll come back.”
“No.”
“Harry,-”
“No. Please, I-… I want to know you’re safe. You’ll stay here and I’ll stay with Gemma.”
“If that’s okay with you.”
“No, it’s actually not.”
She looked at him with the saddest eyes he ever saw and he shook his head and and sighed.
“I’m gonna go pack some stuff and then you won’t have to deal with me anymore.”
“Harry, I did not suggest a break because I want to get away from you as quickly as possible. I want to fix this. And I feel like some distance is the only way to sort things out. Or at least make the first step.”
He didn’t say anything but just left the kitchen and went upstairs to pack a few things. For some reason Y/N couldn’t help but feel guilty. Of course she knew he wouldn’t be happy with taking a break, she wasn’t either. But she hoped he could at least understand where she came from.

When he came down the stairs half an hour later with two big duffle bags Y/N almost felt like crying again. She watched him, how he placed them beside the front door, wiped his tears away, took a deep breath and turned around to make his way to the kitchen so he could say goodbye but she was already standing in the foyer. They stared at each other for a few moments before Harry cleared his throat and removed a greasy strand of hair from his face.
“I’ll go now, I guess.”
“Yeah.” Y/N nodded and sniffled.
He looked at her for another few seconds before he let out a frustrated sigh.
“Can I at least get a hug?”
He saw the surprise on her face but she nodded anyway and took the last few steps towards him. She slung her arms tightly around his neck and pressed her body tightly to his and Harry wrapped his arms around her waist and squeezed her to his chest. He pressed kisses to her shoulder and neck and stroked over her back in gentle patterns.
When they pulled away a bit Y/N reached up to cup his cheeks and stroke over his skin.
“I love you. Nothing changed about that and nothing is going to change. I don’t want you to worry about me breaking up with you. I couldn’t imagine life without you.”
Harry pressed his forehead to hers and pulled her body even closer.
“Will you say goodbye when I’ll leave for New York? Don’t think I could leave without seeing you before.”
“I’ll think about it, okay?”
Harry sighed but nodded.
“C-Can I kiss you?” he asked her in a whisper.
She leaned in and connected her lips to his as an answer, his bottom lip slipping between hers. She kissed him four times before she pulled away a bit to look up at him again.
“I love you. You know that, right?”
She nodded and smiled softly at him.
“I love you, too.”
Harry gazed into her eyes for another few seconds before he pressed a few gentle kisses against her lips again. He pulled away from her then and took his duffle bags.
“I’ll let you know when I’ll leave for New York. You can call me or come over anytime you need, okay?”
“Okay. You can come over or call as well. Even if it’s the middle of the night.”
He nodded and opened the door.
“Take care, yeah?”
“You too, love.”
“I love you.”
“I love you, too.”
And just like that he left.